0:00:00.212,0:00:04.577 ♪ Music playing ♪ 0:00:04.577,0:00:05.981 Guy: If we get married, you could have this every night. Girl: What? 0:00:05.981,0:00:09.344 [Guy on right] You gotta be less of a douche in front of me. 0:00:09.344,0:00:10.578 Owen: Are you getting mad?[br]Yeah. 0:00:10.578,0:00:11.635 Tell me why you're getting mad. 0:00:11.635,0:00:14.455 It, 'cause you're like hilariously offensively douche-y. 0:00:14.455,0:00:16.282 You just gotta cool it. 0:00:16.282,0:00:18.589 No! Nope! Hey! Nope, none of that![br]Hey! Be nice. Be nice. 0:00:18.589,0:00:24.353 Not to you. You just gotta cool it. You gotta be less of a cunt while you're standing in front of me.[br]Teach me, teach me. 0:00:24.353,0:00:27.500 Well, just stand there and don't be a dick. 0:00:27.500,0:00:29.634 Teach me. [br]You're doing a really good job. 0:00:29.634,0:00:33.165 How do you know I don't think you're being a dick? [br]No, just do it like you're doing it. 0:00:33.165,0:00:34.732 How do you know I don't think you're being a dick? 0:00:34.732,0:00:36.956 Just stand still.[br]How do you know I don't think you're being a dick? 0:00:36.956,0:00:39.545 That's it, no just stand still.[br]Society has different value systems. 0:00:39.545,0:00:41.108 But no, that's true. 0:00:41.108,0:00:42.328 'Cause I could tell you to stand still - 0:00:42.328,0:00:42.996 I am! 0:00:42.996,0:00:45.158 And, hey you gotta stand still. 0:00:45.158,0:00:46.791 I am. 0:00:46.791,0:00:47.754 Ok, now we both gotta stand still, gotta suppress our sevles. 0:00:47.754,0:00:51.817 But I'm not, I'm not grabbing strangers and then calling them sluts. I'm just sayin'.[br]Did she have fun? Did she have fun? 0:00:51.817,0:00:52.929 Not with you. 0:00:52.929,0:00:53.879 Really? 0:00:53.879,0:00:55.383 She's gonna regret that tomorrow. 0:00:55.383,0:00:56.290 Why? 0:00:56.290,0:00:57.400 Just cool down. 0:00:57.400,0:00:58.764 Why's she gonna, just tell me why she's gonna regret it. 0:00:58.764,0:01:03.036 'Cause you're a balding ginger loser that she had to grind with in front of a bar. 0:01:03.036,0:01:04.787 Ok, ok, so, wait, wait, wait. [br]Relax. 0:01:04.787,0:01:06.124 Wait, wait, wait. 0:01:06.124,0:01:07.459 So, what you're doing, what are you doing? 0:01:07.459,0:01:08.954 First thing you're doing is tryna make it 0:01:08.954,0:01:11.839 You're representing that conformy shit 0:01:11.839,0:01:14.355 when you're trying to make people who don't look like the ideal way socially 0:01:14.355,0:01:16.522 have a bad time of life. Right?[br]No! I just - 0:01:16.522,0:01:17.817 No, you are, right? 0:01:17.817,0:01:18.807 Number two 0:01:18.807,0:01:21.490 You're tryna say; 'Don't go talking to girls who are having fun'. 0:01:21.490,0:01:22.635 No, no, this is different. 0:01:22.635,0:01:24.292 Right? No, is she smiling? 0:01:24.292,0:01:26.251 If I got out a video camera right now, and we did a video chat check 0:01:26.251,0:01:29.041 would she be smiling and laughing? 0:01:29.041,0:01:30.760 Or would she be frowning? 0:01:30.760,0:01:36.227 Her, and you.[br]Girl: Hi!! -Girl laughing- 0:01:36.227,0:01:38.628 Hey, we're friends now! I'm like, hey, we're friends now! 0:01:38.628,0:01:40.332 No, no- 0:01:40.332,0:01:41.398 You should, now you, now 0:01:41.398,0:01:42.545 here's what we're gonna do. 0:01:42.545,0:01:43.789 You're gonna show me how to talk to girls. 0:01:43.789,0:01:44.505 And I'm gonna learn from you. I'm gonna be open-minded. 0:01:44.505,0:01:45.627 No, no, no, none of that.[br]No, I'm gonna be open-minded. 0:01:45.627,0:01:47.083 Ok, no, no.[br]You know what people like you do? 0:01:47.083,0:01:50.773 You suppress people who do wanna go talk to girls 0:01:50.773,0:01:52.559 and you fuck up their confidence. 0:01:52.559,0:01:55.211 People that are not mentally strong, you fuck 'em up. 0:01:55.211,0:01:56.952 Because people have done that to you, right? 0:01:56.952,0:01:58.730 People hurt you. 0:01:58.730,0:02:00.337 So you pass that cycle of pain. 0:02:00.337,0:02:01.839 We're gonna stop that cycle of pain tonight. 0:02:01.839,0:02:02.632 What are you talking about? 0:02:02.632,0:02:04.070 We're gonna stop the cycle of pain tonight! 0:02:04.070,0:02:05.523 No, no! 0:02:05.523,0:02:06.582 We're gonna party! 0:02:06.582,0:02:07.412 No! 0:02:07.412,0:02:08.582 We're gonna have fun! 0:02:08.582,0:02:10.572 And tonight you're gonna get laid for the first time in your life. 0:02:10.572,0:02:13.462 [Guy off camera] With a girl. [br]And it's gonna be amazing, with a girl, dude. 0:02:13.462,0:02:15.910 And it's gonna be awesome.[br]No, here, we can talk about it. 0:02:15.910,0:02:16.920 It's gonna be awesome! 0:02:16.920,0:02:18.376 Tell me, tell me, tell me. 0:02:18.376,0:02:19.606 What are we gonna do? What are we gonna do? 0:02:19.606,0:02:22.041 No, I do pretty well for myself. But- 0:02:22.041,0:02:23.165 How do you do it? How do you do it? 0:02:23.165,0:02:25.052 But I don't, I don't find , like- 0:02:25.052,0:02:26.880 How do you do it? Where do you meet girls? 0:02:26.880,0:02:28.448 Anywhere you wanna meet girls. 0:02:28.448,0:02:30.024 Like, tell me how. Do you go up to them in the mall? 0:02:30.024,0:02:30.857 No, you don't- 0:02:30.857,0:02:32.417 Do you go up to them in Starbucks? 0:02:32.417,0:02:34.583 The library? 0:02:34.583,0:02:36.121 No, you don't -[br]In the street? 0:02:36.121,0:02:37.909 You don't have to approach anybody anywhere like that. 0:02:37.909,0:02:39.578 How do you, how do you meet girls? Tell me. 0:02:39.578,0:02:40.991 Very easily. 0:02:40.991,0:02:42.332 Tell me how, tell me how. I wanna learn. 0:02:42.332,0:02:45.083 You just smile at a stranger and you see if it works. 0:02:45.083,0:02:48.581 So wait, you just go up like this? 0:02:48.581,0:02:49.580 Watch, I'm gonna practice. You walk up, like [smiles]. 0:02:49.580,0:02:52.166 Wait, here, watch. 0:02:52.166,0:02:53.205 -Yells- HEY! HEY! 0:02:53.205,0:02:55.385 I tried, I tried. This smile? -Laughs- 0:02:55.385,0:02:56.710 No, see, you just seem like you're being really cunt-y. 0:02:56.710,0:02:59.581 I know, I know. Show me. [br]You should just not be. 0:02:59.581,0:03:02.118 Just show me. Just, like this? Like this? 0:03:02.118,0:03:05.416 Nah. I'ma let you wear your cool shirt and shit. Just- 0:03:05.416,0:03:07.965 Dude, don't be mean, that's sarcastic. That's sarcastic. 0:03:07.965,0:03:08.790 No, I - 0:03:08.790,0:03:10.639 [inaudible] aim that weak-minded people to lower their emotions. 0:03:10.639,0:03:13.583 Like, and then they're [delta sure], right? 0:03:13.583,0:03:15.606 See, I wouldn't call me 'weak-minded'. I do really well for myself. 0:03:15.606,0:03:19.499 No, you try, you assume - You do that kinda stuff on other weak-minded people. 0:03:19.499,0:03:22.400 Right?[br]No, I don't, I don't talk to weak-minded people. 0:03:22.400,0:03:25.751 'Cause see, I know people who if you said that to, would be crushed. 0:03:25.751,0:03:27.833 You fuck, You fuck people's heads up. 0:03:27.833,0:03:29.177 No, no, not at all!! 0:03:29.177,0:03:30.884 Yes you do, you fuck people's head up. [br]I don't wanna touch your head. I just saw - 0:03:30.884,0:03:34.996 You do. You called me a balding ginger, you called me a douche.[br]Well, I - 0:03:34.996,0:03:36.293 You told me to stand still. 0:03:36.293,0:03:38.598 You're an asshole. -Laughs-[br]No, no. 0:03:38.598,0:03:39.365 Dude, dude, dude. 0:03:39.365,0:03:41.077 No, no, wait, come back, come back! 0:03:41.077,0:03:44.118 Come back! Asshole! Come back, asshole! 0:03:44.118,0:03:47.148 [Woman squealing and laughing] 0:03:47.148,0:03:49.861 Have you ever kissed a girl before? 0:03:49.861,0:03:51.549 Girl: Of course. I kiss girls all the time. 0:03:51.549,0:03:53.469 We're gonna kiss a girl right now. Slut. Do it. 0:03:53.469,0:03:57.792 -Woman laughing- I love you. 0:03:57.792,0:04:03.376 [Murmuring] Now me. Make her do it on me. -Kissing noises- 0:04:03.376,0:04:06.000 Bleeeeeaaaarrrrggghhhhhh.