1
00:00:01,174 --> 00:00:03,494
(Twilight)
Hey chump, I hear you need some inane favor.
2
00:00:03,494 --> 00:00:08,060
(Rainbow Dash)
Uh, yeah, Twilight could you please hack "Trixie Variety Show" for me?
3
00:00:08,060 --> 00:00:08,850
(Twilight)
Do What Now?
4
00:00:08,856 --> 00:00:12,884
(Rainbow Dash)
It's a website where they show videos that Trixie likes and a lot of ponies go there
5
00:00:12,884 --> 00:00:15,204
And I want ponies to see my videos, so please hack them.
6
00:00:15,207 --> 00:00:20,107
(Twilight)
Ok, there are a number of problems with your brilliant plan, and one of them is that I don't know how to hack computers.
7
00:00:20,107 --> 00:00:21,495
(Rainbow Dash)
But I thought you knew Linux!
8
00:00:21,495 --> 00:00:22,176
(Twilight)
I don't.
9
00:00:22,176 --> 00:00:23,458
(Rainbow Dash)
But it's okay! I bought a book!
10
00:00:23,458 --> 00:00:25,872
And you can read it and use your brain to learn how!
11
00:00:25,872 --> 00:00:27,412
(Twilight)
Another problem is that I don't care!
12
00:00:27,414 --> 00:00:33,624
(Rainbow Dash) Man, friggin "Trixie Variety Show" keeps putting my videos into footnote updates which they call "Roundups",
13
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(Rainbow Dash) And sometimes that's only after I pester them.
14
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(Rainbow Dash) One of them told me in an email that he thought my videos were boring, played-out stories that no one wants to hear again!
15
00:00:41,486 --> 00:00:45,366
(Twilight) Well, it sounds like they don't care either, so the circle is complete.
16
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(Rainbow Dash) Darn it, I've got my own songs, a lengthy script with over 250 lines of dialogue,
17
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(Rainbow Dash) Several voice actors and the entire thing is hand-drawn and edited frame by over 1000 frames!
18
00:00:55,347 --> 00:00:59,627
(Rainbow Dash) Seriously! I had more than 1000 pictures in this folder, BUT THEY SAID THEY'RE NOT GONNA TOUCH IT!
19
00:00:59,627 --> 00:01:05,127
(Twilight) Well, if they let everyone get by on that amount of effort, I'd imagine they'd be buried in thousands of submissions doing the exact same thing.
20
00:01:05,127 --> 00:01:06,287
(Twilight) They, gotta set standards.
21
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(Rainbow Dash) Some guy named "Alclop Pones" made it to the media page by doing a half-assed one minute voiceover of a scene from Peter Pan.
22
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(Rainbow Dash) And another user made it to the media page by adding the chorus "Space Jam" to that.
23
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(Twilight) Why do you want this on this website again?
24
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(Rainbow Dash) I NEED TO BE LOVED!
25
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(Twilight) Okay, look.
26
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(Twilight) It's obvious that the video submission is run fairly unprofessionally,
27
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(Twilight) So if anything, your videos are being bounced or shuffled aside because the guys in charge have a prejudice against
28
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(Twilight) whatever it is you're reading.
29
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(Twilight) So since they're probably not really watching the video to verify quality,
30
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(Twilight) I figure you should just change the title to something else.
31
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(Rainbow Dash) Would I get in trouble for that?
32
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(Twilight) I dunno.
33
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[mmps mmmps, mmmps, mmmps, dat music]
34
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(RD)Rainbow Dash Presents:
Captain Hook the Biker Gorilla
35
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(RD)
"(Secretly it's Rainbow Factory!)"
36
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(RD)
Also, check out my new fireplace!
37
00:02:03,287 --> 00:02:04,947
(Apple Bloom)
This is kinda a long intro, here.
38
00:02:04,947 --> 00:02:07,207
(RD)
Yeah I know! It's a long video!
39
00:02:15,027 --> 00:02:16,637
[Fade to Black]
40
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(RD)
It's a bright, springtime day in Cloudsdale!
41
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The weather is predictably perfect and the reason is because
42
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Today is the day of the Pegasus' exams for all the little fillies and colts.
43
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Scootaloo, you've just turned old enough to take your test.
44
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You woke up feeling a little nervous, but after barfing once you feel a lot better!
45
00:02:33,147 --> 00:02:34,087
(Apple Bloom)
That's gross.
46
00:02:34,087 --> 00:02:37,156
(RD)
Applebloom and Sweetie Belle are here for moral support!
47
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They decided to come along after seeing how weary you were,
48
00:02:39,576 --> 00:02:42,397
so they're tied to your tail and some balloon so they won't fall down.
49
00:02:42,397 --> 00:02:44,117
(Thrakerzod)
THE STRING IS CHAFFING ME.
50
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THAT IS NORMAL.
51
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(Scootaloo)
Don't worry, baby. I know juust the thing to soothe those rubbin' burns.
52
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HOO!
53
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(RD)
So you go out there and you sign a couple waivers, and then you wait in line.
54
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Standing next to you is a little colt.
55
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(Scootaloo)
Hey there handsome, I like your hair. Does the carpet match the drapes?
56
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(Little Colt)
IIII don't knooooww...
57
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(Scootaloo)
Mine doooes!
58
00:03:01,519 --> 00:03:05,159
(Little Colt)
I'm Orion, Orion Comet. You can call me OC for short!
59
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(Scootaloo)
I'm-
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HOO!
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Scootaloo and these are my friends, Applebloom and Thrackerzod!
62
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(Thrackerzod)
I AM A REGULAR, MAGICAL UNICORN.
63
00:03:12,012 --> 00:03:13,631
(Apple Bloom)
I like your wings.
64
00:03:13,631 --> 00:03:17,661
(OC)
I've seen an earth pony in Cloudsdale before! Are they taking the exam?
65
00:03:17,661 --> 00:03:19,421
(SC)
No, they're just here to WATCH MAH ASS!
66
00:03:19,421 --> 00:03:20,018
HOOAAH!
67
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(RD)
There's like some kind of instructor there named Miss Blossomforth.
68
00:03:22,831 --> 00:03:26,165
She looks a lot like Cheerilee except with wings, and she's a totally different color.
69
00:03:26,165 --> 00:03:29,175
(Blossomforth)
Students, stop your chattiness, we have work today!
70
00:03:29,175 --> 00:03:31,946
I have a test to administer and it WILL not be postponed!
71
00:03:31,946 --> 00:03:36,186
Now continue to stand in a disorganized line, I will call your names in alphabetical order so-
72
00:03:36,186 --> 00:03:36,896
YOU!
73
00:03:36,898 --> 00:03:37,808
ARE YOU CHEWING GUM?!
74
00:03:38,817 --> 00:03:39,227
Spit it out!
75
00:03:39,227 --> 00:03:39,557
(Derpy)
PEW!
76
00:03:39,698 --> 00:03:44,489
(Blossomforth)
Now, I will call your names, and our judges will determine if you have passed the exam.
77
00:03:44,489 --> 00:03:48,789
However, I must warn you, there are many ways to fail.
78
00:03:49,321 --> 00:03:52,261
If you fly too far west, you will fail.
79
00:03:52,623 --> 00:03:55,764
If you drop below the cloud layer, you will fail.
80
00:03:55,764 --> 00:03:59,329
If you perform the exam in reverse! You will fail!
81
00:03:59,329 --> 00:04:01,517
(SC)
But what if we opt out of taking the test?
82
00:04:01,517 --> 00:04:03,136
(Blossomforth)
The exam is offered again in the fall.
83
00:04:03,136 --> 00:04:05,706
And upon that exam, you will fail.
84
00:04:05,706 --> 00:04:07,236
(SC)
But what if we finish too fast?
85
00:04:07,236 --> 00:04:08,328
(BF)
Then you will fail!
86
00:04:08,328 --> 00:04:09,809
(SC)
And what if we pass?
87
00:04:09,809 --> 00:04:15,141
(BF)
Then you exit the educational system, and that is a world an educator is frowned upon to understand.
88
00:04:15,471 --> 00:04:17,209
I KNOW NOT WHAT WILL HAPPEN.
89
00:04:17,209 --> 00:04:20,029
(SC)
So, we don't have to go to school anymore?
90
00:04:20,029 --> 00:04:24,029
(BF)
I assume yes! Though I dare not contemplate the consequences...
91
00:04:24,029 --> 00:04:25,789
(SC)
Sweet! Now I want that one!
92
00:04:25,789 --> 00:04:29,109
(RD)
You guys all get ready and Miss Blossomforth calls out some names.
93
00:04:29,109 --> 00:04:30,585
The first one is some little filly named Aurora.
94
00:04:30,585 --> 00:04:32,345
(OC)
I heard she has pony AIDS.
95
00:04:32,345 --> 00:04:35,945
(BF)
YOU THERE. DO NOT TALK DURING THE EXAM.
96
00:04:35,945 --> 00:04:38,671
(RD)
Aurora starts with the test, but pretty much right away she breaks one wing,
97
00:04:38,671 --> 00:04:39,401
dislocates the other,
98
00:04:39,411 --> 00:04:41,081
and chips FOUR TEETH.
99
00:04:41,081 --> 00:04:45,081
She does all of this during freefall, which I'm pretty sure was impossible beforehand.
100
00:04:45,081 --> 00:04:47,048
(OC)
Somebody must help that pony!
101
00:04:47,048 --> 00:04:47,478
[sneak!]
102
00:04:48,968 --> 00:04:51,215
(TZ)
I DO NOT THINK THAT PONY CAN BE HELPED.
103
00:04:51,215 --> 00:04:52,192
(BF)
Are you passing notes!?
104
00:04:52,192 --> 00:04:52,672
[!]
105
00:04:52,672 --> 00:04:56,302
If you are caught passing notes during the exam, then you are failed!
106
00:04:56,302 --> 00:04:59,002
(OC)
But I wasn't passing anything that had to do with the exam!
107
00:04:59,004 --> 00:05:00,102
(BF)
This is an educational system,
108
00:05:00,102 --> 00:05:03,552
And the system DOES not have time to differentiate between good and bad note passing!
109
00:05:03,742 --> 00:05:07,472
Go to the Gate of Shame™ with Aurora, NOOOOWWW!
110
00:05:07,472 --> 00:05:10,022
(Apple Bloom)
I guess he's not passing anything that has to do with the exam.
111
00:05:10,022 --> 00:05:10,422
[ba dum tiss!]
112
00:05:10,422 --> 00:05:13,542
(RD)
O.C. goes to the Gates of Shame™, and your name comes up next, Scootaloo.
113
00:05:13,542 --> 00:05:15,342
(SC)
Here, hold these, guys. Hold 'em tight.
114
00:05:15,342 --> 00:05:17,092
(AB)
Wait! I have an idea!
115
00:05:17,092 --> 00:05:19,372
What if we help with your exam?
116
00:05:19,372 --> 00:05:21,238
(SC)
Well that's brilliant, baby, but I'm not sure I can
117
00:05:21,238 --> 00:05:25,048
Seduce Miss Blossomforth well enough for the judges to allow it, sugarpie.
118
00:05:25,048 --> 00:05:28,848
(BF)
The rules say "No pegasus may receive assistance from another pegasus."
119
00:05:28,848 --> 00:05:30,878
"Or a bizarro pegasus."
120
00:05:30,878 --> 00:05:33,608
The system does not have time to understand it's own intent.
121
00:05:33,608 --> 00:05:36,788
So, you are permitted to receive help from your friends.
122
00:05:36,788 --> 00:05:41,698
However, if they turn out to be secret pegasi, then you will be failed.
123
00:05:41,698 --> 00:05:44,428
(SC)
Alright, let's show them the superiority of a threesome!
124
00:05:44,428 --> 00:05:45,158
HOOAAH!
125
00:05:45,158 --> 00:05:46,718
(AB)
We're gonna ace this test!
126
00:05:46,718 --> 00:05:49,258
(TZ)
YOUR WORDS ARE STUPID, BUT I MUST AGREE WITH THE GROUP.
127
00:05:49,258 --> 00:05:53,258
(SC)
Well, the entire test is just a physical exam so with two other ponies tied to you,
128
00:05:53,258 --> 00:05:56,018
You basically bombed the timed cloud-kicking exercise,
129
00:05:56,018 --> 00:05:58,868
Applebloom gets tangled up in the hoops during agility section,
130
00:05:58,868 --> 00:06:02,777
And the extra weight causes you fall right through the cloud floor during the freefall portion.
131
00:06:02,777 --> 00:06:05,377
The judges... kinda fail you with a vengeance.
132
00:06:05,377 --> 00:06:06,817
(SC)
Wait! I want a do-over!
133
00:06:06,817 --> 00:06:10,577
I had an unfair handicap and then I had TWO fillies ridin' me the WHOLE TIME.
134
00:06:10,577 --> 00:06:11,057
HOO!
135
00:06:11,057 --> 00:06:15,447
(BF)
The educational system does not have time to understand the difference between a normal, unencumbered pony,
136
00:06:15,447 --> 00:06:17,267
And a pony that has other ponies tied to her.
137
00:06:17,267 --> 00:06:19,997
If this exam were fair, it would take ALL DAY.
138
00:06:19,997 --> 00:06:21,627
Now, go to the Gates of Shame™.
139
00:06:21,627 --> 00:06:25,007
(RD)
No amount of logic or reasoning could persuade the educational system, you guys.
140
00:06:25,007 --> 00:06:28,200
You've got no other choice but to go to the Gates of Shame™ with Aurora and Orion.
141
00:06:28,200 --> 00:06:31,065
(TZ)
NO. I WANT TO GO TO THE OTHER PONIES.
142
00:06:31,065 --> 00:06:32,034
THERE ARE MORE OF THEM.
143
00:06:32,034 --> 00:06:35,692
(RD)
Waiting for you there is pretty much the CREEPIEST pony you've ever seen.
144
00:06:35,692 --> 00:06:38,022
It looks like somebody cooked bacon in his hair this morning.
145
00:06:38,022 --> 00:06:43,372
He's got the kind of facial scruff you'd use to scrap crud out of dishes that you left out for like, THE MONTH.
146
00:06:43,372 --> 00:06:47,102
He's got a beat-up old van with no engine in it and you can only assume that he pulls it himself
147
00:06:47,102 --> 00:06:49,692
From Elementary school to Elementary school on the weekdays.
148
00:06:49,692 --> 00:06:52,202
(OC)
I will not stand for this kind of humiliation!
149
00:06:52,202 --> 00:06:54,142
(TZ)
NOBODY IS HUMILIATING YOU.
150
00:06:54,142 --> 00:06:56,262
(AB)
Yeah, you're not being humiliated, Orion.
151
00:06:56,262 --> 00:06:59,002
(TZ)
IT'S TRUE. NOW YOU SOUND LIKE AN IDIOT.
152
00:06:59,002 --> 00:07:03,502
(OC)
Well, NOW I'm being humiliated, and I will not stand for THIS kind of humiliation!
153
00:07:03,502 --> 00:07:04,742
(Creepy Pony)
MY NAME IS DAZZLER.
154
00:07:04,742 --> 00:07:06,252
AND ZIS IS MY CAT.
155
00:07:06,252 --> 00:07:07,252
HE PAYS ZE BILLS
156
00:07:07,252 --> 00:07:08,582
BUT I HAVE RIGHTS TOO!
157
00:07:10,002 --> 00:07:10,342
GET.
158
00:07:10,342 --> 00:07:10,709
IN.
159
00:07:10,709 --> 00:07:11,049
MY.
160
00:07:11,049 --> 00:07:11,509
VAN!!!
161
00:07:11,748 --> 00:07:14,248
(Aurora)
Uhm, my wing is broken...
162
00:07:14,248 --> 00:07:14,758
[crack]
163
00:07:14,758 --> 00:07:17,248
Like, really, really bad.
164
00:07:17,248 --> 00:07:17,998
(Dazzler)
OKAY!
165
00:07:17,998 --> 00:07:19,688
GET-IN-ZE-VAN.
166
00:07:19,688 --> 00:07:24,513
(AU)
I was sorta hoping for some... medical attention?
167
00:07:24,513 --> 00:07:25,463
(DZ)
NIEN!
168
00:07:25,463 --> 00:07:27,673
(OC)
I will not stand for this maltreatment!
169
00:07:27,673 --> 00:07:28,873
(DZ)
FINE, GET IN ZE VAN.
170
00:07:28,873 --> 00:07:30,407
ZE CAT IS A DOCTOR.
171
00:07:30,407 --> 00:07:31,327
[...]
172
00:07:31,327 --> 00:07:33,117
HOW DO YOU THINK HE PAYS ZE RENT?!
173
00:07:33,117 --> 00:07:35,747
(RD)
Aurora climbs in the van and the cat follows afterwards.
174
00:07:35,747 --> 00:07:38,747
Dazzler pops the hood of his van and pulls out some clipboards and stuff.
175
00:07:38,747 --> 00:07:39,977
(DZ)
HERE.
176
00:07:39,977 --> 00:07:41,327
FILL OUT ZIS MEDICAL PAPERWORK AND BE SURE TO LIST ANY
177
00:07:41,327 --> 00:07:43,577
PREEXISTING CONDITIONS OR MEDICATION ALLERGIES.
178
00:07:43,577 --> 00:07:46,717
PLEASE HAND ME YOUR INSURANCE INFORMATION WHEN YOU RETURN ZE FORMS.
179
00:07:46,717 --> 00:07:48,007
(OC)
She has pony AIDS.
180
00:07:48,007 --> 00:07:50,477
(RD)
You guys fill out the confusing paperwork as best you can
181
00:07:50,477 --> 00:07:54,477
And after a while the cat comes out and Dazzler ushers you into the back of the van.
182
00:07:54,477 --> 00:07:58,387
The entire process uses kinda a lot of unnecessary physical contact.
183
00:07:58,387 --> 00:08:03,417
The inside of the van smells like burnt cheese and mouthwash and the only thing in there is like a billion Parasprite™ cans.
184
00:08:03,417 --> 00:08:06,477
It looks like Aurora is all better, though. Or at least in one piece.
185
00:08:06,477 --> 00:08:10,537
That cat is a friggin' miracle worker, granted with a complete lack of medical equipment.
186
00:08:10,537 --> 00:08:13,507
The van starts moving, where you're going you have NO IDEA!
187
00:08:13,507 --> 00:08:15,917
But you get the feeling that it's gonna be kinda a long trip.
188
00:08:15,917 --> 00:08:16,657
(AB)
Soo.....
189
00:08:16,657 --> 00:08:18,967
(TZ)
I HEAR YOU HAVE PONY AIDS.
190
00:08:18,967 --> 00:08:21,987
DO ANY OF THE REST OF US HAVE PONY AIDS?
191
00:08:21,987 --> 00:08:22,407
[snap, crackle, pop!]
192
00:08:22,407 --> 00:08:24,527
(RD)
Wherever Dazzler is taking you, his route is totally indirect.
193
00:08:24,527 --> 00:08:28,527
He's driving ALL OVER Cloudsdale. He stops to the drive-thru at the bank...
194
00:08:28,527 --> 00:08:31,977
(DZ)
JUST BECAUSE ZE CAT PAYS ZE RENT DOESN'T MEAN I DON'T HAVE RIGHTS!
195
00:08:31,977 --> 00:08:33,157
AND I WOULD LIKE TO DEPOSIT A CHECK.
196
00:08:33,157 --> 00:08:35,007
ZE CAT CAN'T STOP ME!
197
00:08:35,007 --> 00:08:37,387
(RD)
He goes to the drive-thru at McSoy's...
198
00:08:37,387 --> 00:08:39,267
(DZ)
I WOULD LIKE A DOUBLE HAPPY.
199
00:08:39,267 --> 00:08:42,937
(Drive-Thru Guy)
Sir, you can have a double happy GET THE HELL OUT OF MY DRIVE-THRU.
200
00:08:42,937 --> 00:08:45,987
(RD)
He drops you off at the hardware store and leaves you there for like an hour.
201
00:08:45,987 --> 00:08:47,937
When he comes back he smells like fish.
202
00:08:47,937 --> 00:08:52,777
Basically, he takes you all over town, then he finally drives you guys to the weather factory in Cloudsdale.
203
00:08:52,777 --> 00:08:54,297
A pair of stallions approach the van.
204
00:08:54,297 --> 00:08:58,505
They're wearing gym clothes and Mexican masks to hide their MYSTERIOUS IDENTITY.
205
00:08:58,505 --> 00:08:59,545
(Masked Pony #1)
Hey, Dazzler!
206
00:08:59,545 --> 00:09:01,255
(DZ)
ZERE'S NOZIN HAY ABOUT IT.
207
00:09:01,255 --> 00:09:02,575
(MP #2) So, uh... These kids...
208
00:09:02,575 --> 00:09:04,565
They're from the actual exam this time, right?
209
00:09:04,565 --> 00:09:06,505
(DZ)
ZE ONLY THING I HATE MORE ZAN CHILDREN
210
00:09:06,505 --> 00:09:08,575
IS CHILDREN ON SKATEBOARDS
211
00:09:08,575 --> 00:09:12,615
(MP #1)
Okay. C'mon kids, let's let Dazzler go back to his grown-up stuff.
212
00:09:12,615 --> 00:09:13,995
We've got a lot of work today.
213
00:09:13,995 --> 00:09:17,845
(RD)
You guys pile out of the van and follow the two masked ponies inside the weather building.
214
00:09:17,845 --> 00:09:21,245
In the reception room, a white pony in a bright purple suit is there waiting.
215
00:09:21,245 --> 00:09:23,655
(White Pony)
Hey, kids! Welcome to the Rainbow Factory™!
216
00:09:23,655 --> 00:09:25,235
It's like Willy Wonka™ in here!
217
00:09:25,235 --> 00:09:27,705
(AU)
Wait, one feels a dream minute...
218
00:09:27,705 --> 00:09:37,870
Our... punishment for failing our exam is we have to take a tour of the Rainbow Factory with a crazy pony?
219
00:09:37,870 --> 00:09:40,230
(SC)
Quick! Which one of us is the fat kid, baby?
220
00:09:40,230 --> 00:09:41,180
I call not it!
221
00:09:41,180 --> 00:09:43,370
(TZ)
I WANT TO BE AN OOMPA LOOMPA.
222
00:09:43,770 --> 00:09:46,000
TAKE ME TO THEM SO THE DEED MAY BE DONE.
223
00:09:46,000 --> 00:09:47,513
(AB)
Nose-goes is the fat kid!
224
00:09:48,809 --> 00:09:52,108
(AU)
Aauwgh... I don't even like chocolate!
225
00:09:52,108 --> 00:09:53,395
(SC)
Too bad, fatty!
226
00:09:53,395 --> 00:09:57,909
(OC)
I am morally outraged with this "fat kid" thing, and in love with Scootaloo!
227
00:09:57,909 --> 00:09:58,389
[beat]
228
00:09:58,389 --> 00:10:02,244
What? Cut me some slack! She looks like my mom, okay?
229
00:10:02,244 --> 00:10:03,835
(White Pony)
See? We are all having fun!
230
00:10:03,835 --> 00:10:05,775
You don't need to run away through the cloud floor
231
00:10:05,775 --> 00:10:07,775
or through the walls or anything!
232
00:10:07,775 --> 00:10:09,880
You're not gonna be ground up into rainbows!
233
00:10:09,880 --> 00:10:13,490
Heh heh, and not a silly thing to think is gonna happen, ya know?
234
00:10:13,490 --> 00:10:14,310
I don't even know!
235
00:10:14,310 --> 00:10:14,740
[shifty eyes...]
236
00:10:14,752 --> 00:10:15,342
Wet wipes-
237
00:10:15,342 --> 00:10:17,982
(TZ)
NOTICE THEM YAWNING! THEY'RE GOING TO GRIND US IN TO RAINBOWS!!
238
00:10:17,982 --> 00:10:21,791
(OC)
Okay, now that's morally outrageous, right? Somebody is with me, aren't they?
239
00:10:21,791 --> 00:10:24,533
I'm starting to get a little frustrated over here!
240
00:10:24,533 --> 00:10:28,873
(AB)
Cut it out you two, she just said we WEREN'T gonna be grinded up into rainbows.
241
00:10:28,873 --> 00:10:34,473
(AU)
Yeah that's kinda rude...uh...Orion...
242
00:10:34,473 --> 00:10:36,073
(OC)
YOUR THE FAT KID!!!
243
00:10:36,073 --> 00:10:36,733
[snap]
244
00:10:36,733 --> 00:10:38,672
(TZ)
WOW. YOU ARE SUCH A JERK.
245
00:10:38,672 --> 00:10:40,612
(SL)
That was just rude, baby.
246
00:10:40,612 --> 00:10:41,570
(AB)
It's ok Aurora.
247
00:10:41,570 --> 00:10:42,770
You ain't fat.
248
00:10:42,770 --> 00:10:51,770
[AU Speaking Incoherently]
249
00:10:51,770 --> 00:10:53,275
What did she ever do to you, huh?
250
00:10:53,275 --> 00:10:53,614
(OC)
But--
251
00:10:53,614 --> 00:10:56,114
(White Pony)
Ok kids! The time for ridicule is over!
252
00:10:56,114 --> 00:10:57,713
I've got a super fun thing for you!
253
00:10:57,713 --> 00:10:58,953
Its a waver form!
254
00:10:58,953 --> 00:11:02,150
It's like a maze or connect the dots but with a signature.
255
00:11:02,150 --> 00:11:03,681
You just write your little names here.
256
00:11:03,681 --> 00:11:05,743
And then we are going on a magical tour.
257
00:11:05,743 --> 00:11:08,416
(TZ)
WAIT. DOESN'T WILLY WONKA KILL ALL THE CHILDREN?
258
00:11:08,416 --> 00:11:10,391
(WP)
Okay, heh. That's a good point.
259
00:11:10,391 --> 00:11:12,676
Okay. I'm not Willy Wonka no more.
260
00:11:12,676 --> 00:11:13,916
I am Polko the Clown.
261
00:11:13,916 --> 00:11:15,386
See! You can trust Polko!
262
00:11:15,386 --> 00:11:16,354
She's safe with kids.
263
00:11:16,354 --> 00:11:19,039
(TZ)
I DECLARE THAT THIS CANNOT GO WRONG!
264
00:11:19,039 --> 00:11:21,947
(AB)
Well if Thrakerzod trusts the situation, then so do I.
265
00:11:21,947 --> 00:11:23,176
(RD)
So you guys sign your wavers,
266
00:11:23,176 --> 00:11:25,385
and follow Polko the Clown on a tour of the factory.
267
00:11:25,385 --> 00:11:27,916
Which ends in a gigantic room made out of fluffy clouds.
268
00:11:27,916 --> 00:11:29,768
There's like a hundred other kids here too though.
269
00:11:29,768 --> 00:11:31,177
Some of them have the sniffles,
270
00:11:31,177 --> 00:11:31,978
or a broken wing.
271
00:11:31,978 --> 00:11:34,738
There's like one kid who has a magical glandular problem,
272
00:11:34,738 --> 00:11:36,829
and his butt's like fallen through the floor.
273
00:11:36,829 --> 00:11:38,675
He'd make a pretty terrible weather pony.
274
00:11:38,675 --> 00:11:40,539
There's also a big machine in here,
275
00:11:40,539 --> 00:11:42,121
and it looks like about six ponies in
276
00:11:42,121 --> 00:11:44,375
Mexican wrestler masks and sweat clothes are watching it.
277
00:11:44,375 --> 00:11:46,068
There's cookies and punch by the door.
278
00:11:46,068 --> 00:11:46,860
Polko flies off.
279
00:11:46,860 --> 00:11:48,619
She says she's got to talk to her boss,
280
00:11:48,619 --> 00:11:50,120
and that there's cookies and punch by the door.
281
00:11:50,120 --> 00:11:51,416
(TZ)
WHAT IS THE MACHINE FOR?
282
00:11:51,416 --> 00:11:51,947
(RD)
Nothing...
283
00:11:51,947 --> 00:11:54,707
(SL)
So...Orion. You love you some--
284
00:11:54,707 --> 00:11:54,957
HOO!
285
00:11:54,957 --> 00:11:56,167
Scootaloo. Do ya?
286
00:11:56,167 --> 00:11:58,694
(OC)
Um...well maybe LOVE isn't the right word.
287
00:11:58,694 --> 00:12:01,162
(SL)
Well baby, the sky is like a big ocean.
288
00:12:01,162 --> 00:12:03,176
And I'm your little love anemone.
289
00:12:03,176 --> 00:12:05,262
(OC)
I thought sea anemones reproduced asexually.
290
00:12:05,262 --> 00:12:08,292
(SL)
Not this sea anemone, my hunkalicious manatee.
291
00:12:08,292 --> 00:12:10,298
(OC)
It's just what my mom would say...
292
00:12:11,148 --> 00:12:13,353
I don't try to understand the fillies in my life,
293
00:12:13,353 --> 00:12:14,886
I just enjoy their company.
294
00:12:14,886 --> 00:12:19,768
(AU)
My mom was really good at embroidery.
295
00:12:19,768 --> 00:12:21,120
(AB)
Y'all should be a tuna.
296
00:12:21,120 --> 00:12:22,446
'Cause they're the chickens of the sea.
297
00:12:22,446 --> 00:12:24,051
(RD)
Suddenly, everyone goes quiet.
298
00:12:24,051 --> 00:12:24,951
And their attention turns to
299
00:12:24,951 --> 00:12:27,103
the most awesome supervisor in the world.
300
00:12:27,103 --> 00:12:29,230
Who has just stepped on the balcony above you.
301
00:12:29,230 --> 00:12:30,822
She's got her mask on backwards again,
302
00:12:30,822 --> 00:12:32,762
but she was in a hurry because she was late.
303
00:12:32,762 --> 00:12:33,537
So...you know.
304
00:12:33,537 --> 00:12:36,052
But you can just tell that she's the fastest supervisor
305
00:12:36,052 --> 00:12:36,854
in Equestria.
306
00:12:36,854 --> 00:12:39,176
She can't breathe or anything so she takes off her mask
307
00:12:39,176 --> 00:12:40,229
so she can turn it around and...
308
00:12:40,229 --> 00:12:42,230
OMGOSH!!! IT'S RAINBOW DASH!!!
309
00:12:42,230 --> 00:12:43,113
She's so awesome!!
310
00:12:43,113 --> 00:12:44,020
(AB)
Hi Rainbow Dash!!
311
00:12:44,020 --> 00:12:45,631
(RD)
Well hey guys! How's it going?
312
00:12:45,631 --> 00:12:47,762
(SL)
We're ok baby, how about you?
313
00:12:47,762 --> 00:12:49,292
Wanna meet my new boyfriend?
314
00:12:49,292 --> 00:12:51,114
(RD)
Yeah sure! I'll come right down!
315
00:12:51,114 --> 00:12:54,540
(Polko the Clown)
Hey boss! Uh...aren't we supposed to...uh...you know?
316
00:12:54,540 --> 00:12:57,176
(RD)
Uh...yeah about that...
317
00:12:57,176 --> 00:13:00,143
I was thinking that maybe...you know...
318
00:13:00,143 --> 00:13:03,781
I'm really tired today, and the kids just got here.
319
00:13:03,781 --> 00:13:06,719
And there's cookies and punch by the door.
320
00:13:06,719 --> 00:13:07,903
And I brought my stereo.
321
00:13:07,903 --> 00:13:11,520
So...instead of doing the thing
322
00:13:11,520 --> 00:13:13,650
that we normally do...
323
00:13:13,650 --> 00:13:14,583
Uh...maybe...we could have a
324
00:13:14,583 --> 00:13:15,557
Pizza Party!!!
325
00:13:15,557 --> 00:13:17,114
(PtheC)
Okay. First thing;
326
00:13:17,114 --> 00:13:18,490
we can't afford that many pizzas.
327
00:13:18,490 --> 00:13:19,401
Second thing;
328
00:13:19,401 --> 00:13:20,780
the only reason we afford anything at all
329
00:13:20,780 --> 00:13:21,800
is because someone is paying us
330
00:13:21,800 --> 00:13:22,772
to do a job!!
331
00:13:22,772 --> 00:13:24,126
(RD)
WELL IT'S A SUCKY JOB!!!
332
00:13:24,126 --> 00:13:25,264
(AB)
Hey rainbow dash.
333
00:13:25,264 --> 00:13:26,305
(RD)
Hey Apple Bloom.
334
00:13:26,305 --> 00:13:28,600
(AB)
How come you're wearing a wrestler mask?
335
00:13:28,600 --> 00:13:31,069
(RD)
Oh! Well it's the dress code that we have to wear a mask.
336
00:13:31,069 --> 00:13:34,353
'Cause this whole factory thing is like a secret conspiracy
337
00:13:34,353 --> 00:13:36,067
except moral was really low because
338
00:13:36,067 --> 00:13:37,536
all we did was secretly grind ponies into
339
00:13:37,536 --> 00:13:38,431
other rainbows.
340
00:13:38,431 --> 00:13:40,190
So I thought it would really help everyone
341
00:13:40,190 --> 00:13:41,656
to do "Crazy tight mondays",
342
00:13:41,656 --> 00:13:43,308
and "Casual Fridays".
343
00:13:43,308 --> 00:13:44,852
But they still have to wear the masks,
344
00:13:44,852 --> 00:13:46,721
but the WRESTLER masks are individual.
345
00:13:46,721 --> 00:13:48,593
So everyone gets to feel like they're
346
00:13:48,593 --> 00:13:49,655
recognized and important.
347
00:13:49,655 --> 00:13:50,822
(AB)
That's really nice...
348
00:13:50,822 --> 00:13:53,215
(RD)
I've only been working here for 3 days,
349
00:13:53,215 --> 00:13:54,747
but I'm already like the best supervisor.
350
00:13:54,747 --> 00:13:58,314
(AB)
Um...what was that part about the rainbows
351
00:13:58,314 --> 00:13:59,753
and the grinding again?
352
00:13:59,753 --> 00:14:00,263
(RD)
Oh...
353
00:14:00,263 --> 00:14:02,292
(PC)
MAN YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO TELL THEM!!
354
00:14:02,292 --> 00:14:03,323
THEY DON'T CALL IT A CONSPIRACY
355
00:14:03,323 --> 00:14:04,446
BECAUSE YOU ANNOUNCE IT TO A ROOM
356
00:14:04,446 --> 00:14:05,563
OF 100 CHILDREN!!
357
00:14:05,563 --> 00:14:06,975
NOW I DRESSED UP LIKE WILLY WONKA
358
00:14:06,975 --> 00:14:08,248
AND A CLOWN FOR NOTHING!!!
359
00:14:08,248 --> 00:14:10,853
(OC)
See! Outrage!! Totally justified!!!
360
00:14:10,853 --> 00:14:14,248
(AU)
WE'RE GONNA BE GROUNDED UP INTO RAINBOWS!!
361
00:14:14,248 --> 00:14:16,512
(RD)
No!! There's punch and cookies by the door.
362
00:14:16,512 --> 00:14:17,561
No rainbows!!
363
00:14:17,561 --> 00:14:18,400
Pizza Party!!!
364
00:14:18,400 --> 00:14:20,114
(SL)
You've been grinding up ponies, baby?
365
00:14:20,114 --> 00:14:22,291
Are you sure you don't mean grinding up ON ponies?
366
00:14:22,291 --> 00:14:22,685
HOO!
367
00:14:22,685 --> 00:14:24,747
(RD)
NO! I HAVEN'T DONE ANY GRINDING!!
368
00:14:24,747 --> 00:14:26,522
On the first day, I locked myself in the bathroom,
369
00:14:26,522 --> 00:14:27,630
and I was all like:
370
00:14:27,630 --> 00:14:30,007
No! No-- the bathroom is occupied!!!
371
00:14:30,007 --> 00:14:34,006
You can't come in-- you can't make me go out of there!!
372
00:14:34,006 --> 00:14:36,659
You didn't tell me it was going to be little children!!
373
00:14:36,659 --> 00:14:40,413
(...rainbow babble...)
374
00:14:40,413 --> 00:14:41,945
And they had to break down the door,
375
00:14:41,945 --> 00:14:44,093
and drag me outta there, and the sent me home after
376
00:14:44,093 --> 00:14:47,094
On the second day, they had the key so they didn't have to break anything down.
377
00:14:47,094 --> 00:14:48,822
And today's the third day, and we've earned a break
378
00:14:48,822 --> 00:14:50,339
and we should have a pizza party!!!
379
00:14:50,339 --> 00:14:51,946
There's cookies and punch by the door.
380
00:14:51,946 --> 00:14:53,370
(AB)
Well what's the point?
381
00:14:53,370 --> 00:14:55,538
(RD)
Okay. There's a really good reason for this,
382
00:14:55,538 --> 00:14:56,853
and I can totally explain.
383
00:14:56,853 --> 00:14:58,389
...maybe over some pizza?
384
00:14:58,389 --> 00:14:59,571
(PC)
No...
385
00:14:59,571 --> 00:15:03,007
(OC)
There's no good reason for us to be ground into rainbows.
386
00:15:03,007 --> 00:15:04,502
(TZ)
I AM A NORMAL PONY.
387
00:15:04,692 --> 00:15:08,268
AND AS SUCH I DESIRE A NORMAL EXPLANATION,
388
00:15:08,268 --> 00:15:11,476
IN DETAIL...OF THE RITUAL SACRIFICE OF CHILDREN.
389
00:15:11,476 --> 00:15:12,468
(PC looks at RD)
390
00:15:12,468 --> 00:15:13,857
(RD)
Who...me?
391
00:15:13,857 --> 00:15:15,657
(PC)
You're the one who told them in the first place!
392
00:15:15,657 --> 00:15:17,662
(RD)
Um...ok, give me a second.
393
00:15:17,662 --> 00:15:18,291
click
394
00:15:18,291 --> 00:15:20,728
[cue funky techno music]
395
00:15:26,247 --> 00:15:29,216
[ ❤ doo doo doo ❤ ]
396
00:15:42,166 --> 00:15:44,210
♬ You will be turned into rainbows ♬
397
00:15:44,210 --> 00:15:46,294
♬ Everyone will be so happy ♬
398
00:15:46,294 --> 00:15:48,056
♬ You'll be gone, but that's okay ♬
399
00:15:48,056 --> 00:15:50,202
♬ Oh hey, cheer up! It's not that crappy. ♬
400
00:15:50,202 --> 00:15:52,307
♬ If you assume it your life goal ♬
401
00:15:52,307 --> 00:15:54,299
♬ to convert into a rainbow. ♬
402
00:15:54,299 --> 00:15:56,294
♬ You'd dare not be dissappointed, ♬
403
00:15:56,294 --> 00:15:58,356
♬ once I stuff you into this hole. ♬
404
00:16:06,265 --> 00:16:08,234
♬ This is where we take your taxes, ♬
405
00:16:08,234 --> 00:16:10,238
♬ Where we make the weather wanted. ♬
406
00:16:10,238 --> 00:16:12,214
♬ We're not chemists, so don't ask us ♬
407
00:16:12,214 --> 00:16:14,241
♬ how this method got so vaunted. ♬
408
00:16:14,318 --> 00:16:16,378
♬ This job does not need a degree, ♬
409
00:16:16,378 --> 00:16:18,346
♬ That is how they got stuck with me. ♬
410
00:16:18,346 --> 00:16:20,312
♬ I need this for healthcare, you see. ♬
411
00:16:20,312 --> 00:16:22,337
♬ So I can afford therapy! ♬
412
00:16:26,456 --> 00:16:29,700
[ ❤ doo doo doo ❤ ]
413
00:16:30,180 --> 00:16:32,800
(PC)
Man, there is a good reason, but that don't tell them nothing!
414
00:16:32,988 --> 00:16:35,488
(RD)
What do you mean? I need the friggin' health benefits.
415
00:16:35,488 --> 00:16:37,272
(PC)
That's it?! What about the history??
416
00:16:37,272 --> 00:16:39,772
(RD)
The history is that I'm not going back to eleven twenty-five an hour,
417
00:16:39,772 --> 00:16:42,939
because I eat too much fast food,and it's really hard to pay my bills...
418
00:16:42,939 --> 00:16:43,617
[awkward silence]
419
00:16:43,617 --> 00:16:46,470
Okay, I'll admit that they usually say you should do it for the love of the job
420
00:16:46,470 --> 00:16:48,884
and not the money, but the economy is really rough right now,
421
00:16:48,884 --> 00:16:50,037
and this is the best I could get.
422
00:16:50,037 --> 00:16:54,271
(PC)
You know what? Forget you! I'm gonna' explain it Losino style! Listen up kids!
423
00:16:58,366 --> 00:17:00,238
♬ Let's go back to a thousand years ago. ♬
424
00:17:00,238 --> 00:17:02,099
♬ Everything you know is owned by Celestia ♬
425
00:17:02,099 --> 00:17:04,113
♬ The tiny blade of grass that fed on the sun. ♬
426
00:17:04,113 --> 00:17:06,160
♬ The tiny grasshopper that fed on the grass. ♬
427
00:17:06,160 --> 00:17:08,207
♬ The snake in the grass that fed on the grasshopper. ♬
428
00:17:08,207 --> 00:17:10,099
♬ And the holy evil government owned by Celestia. ♬
429
00:17:10,099 --> 00:17:12,083
♬ All things trod beneath an iron hoof. ♬
430
00:17:12,083 --> 00:17:14,329
♬ United, provided, divided by Celestia. ♬
431
00:17:14,329 --> 00:17:16,144
♬ All hailed humbly to the mighty god. ♬
432
00:17:16,144 --> 00:17:17,374
♬ Until one day ♬
433
00:17:17,374 --> 00:17:20,120
♬Then...came...the war!!!♬
434
00:17:20,120 --> 00:17:22,323
[musical guitar music]
435
00:17:22,323 --> 00:17:24,323
♬ Nightmare Moon swept from the sky ♬
436
00:17:24,323 --> 00:17:26,222
♬ lasers from her eyes and teeth like knives. ♬
437
00:17:26,222 --> 00:17:28,130
♬ The power of our god was simply not enough ♬
438
00:17:28,130 --> 00:17:29,965
♬ to overcome....her sister! ♬
439
00:17:29,965 --> 00:17:32,146
♬ The one had sacrificed a piece of her mind ♬
440
00:17:32,146 --> 00:17:34,266
♬ to the dark gods for deeds unkind! ♬
441
00:17:34,266 --> 00:17:36,038
♬ Hope seemed lost, until the time ♬
442
00:17:36,038 --> 00:17:41,783
♬ Celestia....developed....a plan! ♬
443
00:17:42,353 --> 00:17:44,288
♬ pitch one power to retain the rest! ♬
444
00:17:44,288 --> 00:17:46,206
♬ Sacrifice in turn was the gist. ♬
445
00:17:46,206 --> 00:17:48,209
♬ With so many, what was one? ♬
446
00:17:48,209 --> 00:17:50,323
♬ This foul war MUST BE DONE!!! ♬
447
00:17:50,323 --> 00:17:52,215
♬ It must be something she could do without. ♬
448
00:17:52,215 --> 00:17:53,980
♬ A superfluous power she could leave out. ♬
449
00:17:53,980 --> 00:17:56,113
♬ She purveyed them all, and made her decision. ♬
450
00:17:56,113 --> 00:17:58,176
♬ She rested her choice, her prismatic precision. ♬
451
00:17:58,176 --> 00:18:00,074
♬ No more rainbows was her decree! ♬
452
00:18:00,074 --> 00:18:02,145
♬ Equestria's ponies would pay this fee! ♬
453
00:18:02,145 --> 00:18:04,323
♬ But petty politics sought another route! ♬
454
00:18:04,323 --> 00:18:06,113
♬ The electorate could not do without! ♬
455
00:18:06,113 --> 00:18:08,114
♬ So the duty fell to the pegasi, ♬
456
00:18:08,114 --> 00:18:09,403
♬ And when they found the solution, ♬
457
00:18:09,403 --> 00:18:10,583
♬ they began to cry. ♬
458
00:18:10,583 --> 00:18:14,145
OHHH NOOO!!!!
459
00:18:14,145 --> 00:18:15,904
♬ We can't procure pigments without grinding our youth. ♬
460
00:18:15,904 --> 00:18:18,114
♬ Into a fine mist of color, and that is the truth! ♬
461
00:18:18,114 --> 00:18:20,206
♬ But our pleas for reprieve fell upon deaf ears! ♬
462
00:18:20,206 --> 00:18:22,144
♬ And the exit polls showed our greatest fears. ♬
463
00:18:22,144 --> 00:18:24,007
♬ We must make rainbows, there wasn't a choice! ♬
464
00:18:24,007 --> 00:18:27,069
♬ The boneheads and mud ponies smothered our voice! ♬
465
00:18:30,859 --> 00:18:32,223
♬ And so... ♬
466
00:18:32,223 --> 00:18:34,114
♬ We built... ♬
467
00:18:34,114 --> 00:18:36,914
♬ A machiiiiinnneee!!! ♬
468
00:18:36,914 --> 00:18:37,978
[dramatic pause]
469
00:18:37,978 --> 00:18:40,112
(TZ)
YOUR PLANS ARE INTERESTING.
470
00:18:40,112 --> 00:18:42,253
BUT I THINK THEY MAY BE IMPROVED UPON.
471
00:18:42,706 --> 00:18:44,953
FOR EXAMPLE, PERHAPS WE MIGHT INSCRIBE
472
00:18:44,953 --> 00:18:46,888
CERTAIN WORDS ON THE MACHINE WHEN THE
473
00:18:46,888 --> 00:18:48,686
CHILDREN ARE SACRIFICED.
474
00:18:48,686 --> 00:18:52,194
(RD)
Aww... see? What a great kid! She's so helpful!
475
00:18:52,194 --> 00:18:53,568
We should throw a pizza party!
476
00:18:53,568 --> 00:18:56,629
(PC)
No way! If we don't do this now, it's gonna be us in that thing!
477
00:18:56,629 --> 00:18:57,877
Bring one of those kids up!
478
00:18:57,877 --> 00:19:01,235
(RD)
Oh...I dunno. Maybe we should sing another song...
479
00:19:01,235 --> 00:19:02,919
(PC)
WE DON'T HAVE TIME FOR ANOTHER SONG!!!
480
00:19:02,919 --> 00:19:06,006
We'll sing tomorrow, now just hurry up and do what's gotta be done!
481
00:19:06,006 --> 00:19:07,327
(RD)
OKAY!!!!
482
00:19:07,327 --> 00:19:12,235
Okay... Orion. Now you just sit here, al-alright...
483
00:19:12,235 --> 00:19:13,166
(PC)
Come on!!!!
484
00:19:13,166 --> 00:19:15,920
(RD crying)
Um-okay... so we discovered...
485
00:19:15,920 --> 00:19:17,449
that for whatever reason...
486
00:19:17,449 --> 00:19:21,158
the rainbow process works better if you're holding a puppy.
487
00:19:21,158 --> 00:19:23,006
So...here's a puppy.
488
00:19:23,006 --> 00:19:27,128
I...I named him "Mr. Snuffles" because of the way he tickles my neck.
489
00:19:27,128 --> 00:19:31,950
And...and also, it works better if you hold a picture of your family.
490
00:19:31,950 --> 00:19:36,764
So...here's a nice picture we got of your parents, wishing you good luck on the exam.
491
00:19:36,764 --> 00:19:43,691
And also--also it works better if you have a box of crayons.
492
00:19:43,691 --> 00:19:46,005
So that yo--so that you can color...
493
00:19:46,005 --> 00:19:48,858
when you go to pony HEAVEN!!
[sob... (ಥ﹏ಥ) ]
494
00:19:48,858 --> 00:19:49,629
(PC)
Man, get over it!!
495
00:19:49,629 --> 00:19:51,535
After a few of these it's like nothing!
496
00:19:51,535 --> 00:19:53,235
Sure you stay up late at night, thinking about
497
00:19:53,235 --> 00:19:54,950
how your family will think of you.
498
00:19:54,950 --> 00:19:57,006
You wonder what pony hell is gonna be like.
499
00:19:57,006 --> 00:19:58,889
But, other than that it's no big deal
500
00:19:58,889 --> 00:19:59,630
(RD)
NO!!!
501
00:19:59,630 --> 00:20:00,420
(PC)
Come on man!!
502
00:20:00,420 --> 00:20:02,660
(RD)
WAIT!! I'M NOT READY!!
503
00:20:02,660 --> 00:20:04,421
(AB)
I think maybe we should escape.
504
00:20:04,421 --> 00:20:06,296
(TZ)
THAT PONY IS GOING TO BE SACRIFICED!
505
00:20:06,296 --> 00:20:09,327
OH, I'M GOING TO UTTER A PRAYER SO HARD.
506
00:20:09,327 --> 00:20:09,919
[pause]
507
00:20:09,919 --> 00:20:12,327
I MEAN, YES WE--UM--YEAH WE SHOULD ESCAPE.
508
00:20:12,327 --> 00:20:14,481
(AU)
But how are we going to escape?
509
00:20:14,481 --> 00:20:17,766
My wing is broken so I can't fly!
510
00:20:17,766 --> 00:20:19,536
(SL)
She makes a good point, baby.
511
00:20:19,536 --> 00:20:22,067
We are surrounded by an impenetrable prison of fluffy clouds.
512
00:20:22,067 --> 00:20:24,935
And a hundred of us unrestrained children are being guarded
513
00:20:24,935 --> 00:20:28,037
by no less than six colorful winged ponies!!
514
00:20:28,037 --> 00:20:30,344
Surely nothing could more terrifying.
515
00:20:30,344 --> 00:20:32,359
(AB)
We need to devise an extraordinary plan!!
516
00:20:32,359 --> 00:20:33,067
(TZ)
NO.
517
00:20:33,067 --> 00:20:35,451
I'M SURE A REGULAR PLAN WILL BE JUST FINE.
518
00:20:35,451 --> 00:20:38,166
(AU)
Maybe we can tell everyone to
519
00:20:38,166 --> 00:20:41,949
follow the secrets from the exam from earlier,
520
00:20:41,949 --> 00:20:46,598
and each secret will be a code for a particular kind of attack!
521
00:20:46,598 --> 00:20:48,828
(TZ)
OH, I'M SORRY. YOU MEAN THE EXAM THAT EVERYONE
522
00:20:48,828 --> 00:20:51,329
IN THIS ROOM WAS TOO MENTALLY DEFICIENT TO PASS?
523
00:20:51,329 --> 00:20:52,765
(AB)
We need to think of a distraction.
524
00:20:52,765 --> 00:20:53,796
(SL)
HEY EVERYONE!!
525
00:20:53,796 --> 00:20:54,908
LOOK AT SCOOTALOO DANCE!!
526
00:20:54,908 --> 00:20:56,505
(AB)
WE NEED TO THINK OF A DISTRACTION THAT DOESN'T
527
00:20:56,505 --> 00:20:58,253
DRAW ATTENTION TO US!!!!
528
00:20:58,253 --> 00:21:01,659
(AU)
OH MY GOD THEIR GOING TO GRIND US INTO
529
00:21:01,659 --> 00:21:03,327
RAINBOWS!!!!
530
00:21:03,327 --> 00:21:03,906
[pause]
531
00:21:03,906 --> 00:21:05,006
EVERYBODY PANIC!!
532
00:21:05,006 --> 00:21:06,648
[cue panic noises]
533
00:21:06,648 --> 00:21:07,995
(RD)
Oh My Gosh. Wait guys!
534
00:21:07,995 --> 00:21:10,128
We--we don't have to get violent!!
535
00:21:10,128 --> 00:21:10,709
We can still have a
536
00:21:10,709 --> 00:21:11,271
Pizza Party!!
537
00:21:11,271 --> 00:21:13,211
There's punch and cookies by the door!!
538
00:21:13,211 --> 00:21:14,234
(AB)
Good work Aurora!!
539
00:21:14,234 --> 00:21:15,505
Now everyone run!
540
00:21:15,505 --> 00:21:16,389
[runs to door]
541
00:21:16,389 --> 00:21:19,343
IT'S LOCKED! AND MADE OF CLOUDS!! WHAT DO WE DO?
542
00:21:19,343 --> 00:21:21,566
[cue Thrakerzod #2!!]
543
00:21:21,566 --> 00:21:23,317
(AB)
Did y'all just come from over there?
544
00:21:23,317 --> 00:21:24,314
(TZ #2)
YES.
545
00:21:24,314 --> 00:21:25,975
I HAVE TRAVERSED THE PLANE OF
546
00:21:25,975 --> 00:21:27,067
THE RAINBOW FACTORY.
547
00:21:27,067 --> 00:21:29,735
(SL)
Tell us how to boogie on outta here baby!!
548
00:21:29,735 --> 00:21:31,129
(TZ)
VERY WELL.
549
00:21:31,129 --> 00:21:33,097
YOU CAN START BY RUNNING UP THE STAIRS,
550
00:21:33,097 --> 00:21:33,967
TO THE CRYPT.
551
00:21:33,967 --> 00:21:35,951
GRAB THE BOOK FROM THE SKELETONS,
552
00:21:35,951 --> 00:21:38,721
AND PASS INTO THE PIT OF THE PENDULUM.
553
00:21:38,721 --> 00:21:40,482
KNOCK OVER THE COLUMN,
554
00:21:40,482 --> 00:21:43,481
AND CLIMB INTO THE KING'S STOREROOM!!
555
00:21:43,481 --> 00:21:45,536
SMASH THE CLAY POTS TO FIND THE KEY,
556
00:21:45,536 --> 00:21:48,450
TO LEAD YOU INTO THE CHAMBER OF THE SECRET MARKERS!!
557
00:21:48,450 --> 00:21:50,920
MATCH THE SYMBOLS ON THE RIGHT TO THOSE ON THE LEFT,
558
00:21:50,920 --> 00:21:52,066
AND PASS INTO THE ROOM OF
559
00:21:52,066 --> 00:21:53,796
THE ANCIENT WARRIORS!!
560
00:21:53,796 --> 00:21:55,567
PLACE YOURSELF IN THE CORRECT ARMOR,
561
00:21:55,567 --> 00:21:56,690
AND OPEN THE DOOR TO THE
562
00:21:56,690 --> 00:21:59,567
SHRINE OF THE SILVER MONKEY.
563
00:21:59,567 --> 00:22:01,766
ASSEMBLE THE STATUE, AND YOU MAY BE HEADED TO THE
564
00:22:01,766 --> 00:22:03,857
ROOM OF THE SECRET PASSWORD!!
565
00:22:03,857 --> 00:22:06,189
FIND THE TABLET WITH THE CORRECT INSCRIPTION
566
00:22:06,189 --> 00:22:07,629
AND SHOUT IT TO OPEN THE DOOR TO THE
567
00:22:07,629 --> 00:22:09,741
PHARAOH'S SECRET PASSAGE!!
568
00:22:09,741 --> 00:22:11,364
SLIDE DOWN THE TUNNEL, TO THE
569
00:22:11,364 --> 00:22:13,056
QUICKSAND BOUGH, WHERE YOU CAN SMASH THROUGH TO
570
00:22:13,056 --> 00:22:14,952
THE DARK FOREST!!
571
00:22:14,952 --> 00:22:17,196
BUT BEWARE OF THE TEMPLE GUARDS
572
00:22:17,196 --> 00:22:19,098
WHICH MAY INHABIT THE TREES.
573
00:22:19,098 --> 00:22:20,479
FIND THE KEY IN THE TREE, AND YOU'LL ENTER
574
00:22:20,479 --> 00:22:23,072
THE JESTER'S COURT!!
575
00:22:23,072 --> 00:22:24,919
PRESS YOURSELF AGAINST THE CORRECT WALL
576
00:22:24,919 --> 00:22:26,740
PAINTING, AND YOU'LL GAIN ENTRY TO
577
00:22:26,740 --> 00:22:28,358
THE TOMB OF THE HEADLESS KINGS!!
578
00:22:28,358 --> 00:22:30,887
PULL THE VINES TO RELEASE THEIR BONES.
579
00:22:30,887 --> 00:22:33,536
AND ATTACH THE MISSING SKULLS TO THE
580
00:22:33,536 --> 00:22:34,234
PROPER KING.
581
00:22:34,234 --> 00:22:35,452
THEN RACE THROUGH THE VENT,
582
00:22:35,452 --> 00:22:36,690
CLIMB THROUGH THE LEDGES,
583
00:22:36,690 --> 00:22:37,752
RACE DOWN THE STAIRS,
584
00:22:37,752 --> 00:22:39,449
AND BACK THROUGH THE TEMPLE GATE.
585
00:22:39,449 --> 00:22:41,844
THE CHOICES ARE YOURS AND YOURS ALONE!!
586
00:22:41,844 --> 00:22:45,006
(AU)
You guys, go ahead!
587
00:22:45,006 --> 00:22:51,140
I will wait here and violently rage a war between
588
00:22:51,140 --> 00:22:52,982
Rainbow Dash.
589
00:22:52,982 --> 00:22:53,796
(AB)
'Kay, bye!!
590
00:22:53,796 --> 00:22:56,119
(RD)
Hey kid! Did Apple Bloom and her friends [snap] go that way?
591
00:22:56,119 --> 00:22:58,526
Oh my gosh!! I'm so sorry!!
592
00:22:58,526 --> 00:23:01,766
I--um--uh--here.
593
00:23:01,766 --> 00:23:02,741
(RD narrates)
So you guys do really well!
594
00:23:02,741 --> 00:23:06,012
You make it all the way to the room of the
Silver Monkey.
595
00:23:06,012 --> 00:23:07,995
(AB)
I'm trying to force it, but it won't go!!
596
00:23:07,995 --> 00:23:09,235
(TZ & TZ)
THE HEAD IS BACKWARDS.
597
00:23:09,235 --> 00:23:10,607
(SL)
Try jiggling it around!
598
00:23:10,607 --> 00:23:11,958
(TZ & TZ)
THE HEAD IS BACKWARDS.
599
00:23:11,958 --> 00:23:13,057
(AB)
Maybe it's broken...
600
00:23:13,057 --> 00:23:14,451
(TZ & TZ)
THE HEAD IS BACKWARDS!!!
601
00:23:14,451 --> 00:23:15,889
(RD)
Then you get grabbed by temple guards.
602
00:23:15,889 --> 00:23:17,727
They take you to the main factory,
603
00:23:17,727 --> 00:23:18,887
where everyone has calmed down now,
604
00:23:18,887 --> 00:23:20,450
and they're enjoying the punch and cookies.
605
00:23:20,450 --> 00:23:21,861
You don't know how that came to pass,
606
00:23:21,861 --> 00:23:23,648
but they do look like good cookies...
607
00:23:23,648 --> 00:23:24,470
[ BLAM!!!! ]
608
00:23:24,470 --> 00:23:26,328
(AB)
RUN THRACKERZOD!! HELP US!!!
609
00:23:26,328 --> 00:23:27,455
[ ANOTHER BLAM!!! ]
610
00:23:27,455 --> 00:23:29,526
(AB)
How long before you think y'all come back?
611
00:23:29,526 --> 00:23:32,525
(TZ)
I ALREADY OPENED THE DOOR FOR YOU AND GAVE YOU DIRECTIONS.
612
00:23:32,525 --> 00:23:34,266
WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!?
613
00:23:34,266 --> 00:23:35,859
(RD)
The temple guards leave you at the top of the
Rainbow Machine,
614
00:23:35,859 --> 00:23:38,525
where Orion is still sitting with his puppy and stuff.
615
00:23:38,525 --> 00:23:40,982
Dash has cleverly taped an out of order sign
616
00:23:40,982 --> 00:23:42,389
to the operating lever on the thing,
617
00:23:42,389 --> 00:23:43,827
so the day is probably saved.
618
00:23:43,827 --> 00:23:45,088
(PC)
Very funny man.
619
00:23:45,088 --> 00:23:46,210
I'm the factory engineer.
620
00:23:46,210 --> 00:23:47,797
I think I'd know if the machine was broken down.
621
00:23:47,797 --> 00:23:49,149
(RD)
You don't know!! You didn't check it first.
622
00:23:49,149 --> 00:23:51,858
We have to close down for maintenance!!
623
00:23:51,858 --> 00:23:53,057
(PC)
Alright boss, I know your new, and this is hard.
624
00:23:53,057 --> 00:23:55,135
Look, I'll tell you what.
625
00:23:55,135 --> 00:23:57,179
How 'bout we take the kid and the puppy off the machine.
626
00:23:57,179 --> 00:23:58,636
And we just do a practice run, ok?
627
00:23:58,636 --> 00:24:00,088
(RD)
Okay...
628
00:24:00,088 --> 00:24:02,273
(PC)
Now come over here, and pull the lever, man.
629
00:24:02,273 --> 00:24:05,858
(RD)
Right...the lever...uh which part was that again?
630
00:24:05,858 --> 00:24:07,735
I THINK I SHOULD GO TO THE BATHROOM
631
00:24:07,735 --> 00:24:08,617
AND CHECK THE MANUAL.
632
00:24:08,617 --> 00:24:09,388
REALLY LOUDLY!
633
00:24:09,388 --> 00:24:10,950
(PC)
The bathroom doesn't have locks anymore.
634
00:24:10,950 --> 00:24:12,242
(RD)
That's ok!
635
00:24:12,242 --> 00:24:14,327
(PC)
Look, I'll show you. It's not so bad, see?
636
00:24:14,327 --> 00:24:15,574
(RD)
Polko the Engineer Clown pulls the lever.
637
00:24:15,574 --> 00:24:18,119
The crayons and a picture of Orion's family
638
00:24:18,119 --> 00:24:21,215
fall into the hole and disappear into a pit of wiring blades.
639
00:24:21,215 --> 00:24:23,470
After some silly noises a stream of colorful rainbows
640
00:24:23,470 --> 00:24:25,953
flows out of the bottom of the machine and into a giant vat.
641
00:24:25,953 --> 00:24:28,711
(PC)
Did--di--did that thing just make rainbows.
642
00:24:28,711 --> 00:24:31,494
(RD)
Yeah... That's what it's supposed to do right?
643
00:24:31,494 --> 00:24:33,649
(PC)
Out of crayons and a picture of a family?
644
00:24:33,649 --> 00:24:35,040
Are you kidding me?!?
645
00:24:35,040 --> 00:24:36,087
We don't even need a kid?
646
00:24:36,087 --> 00:24:37,959
(RD)
Um... I guess so.
647
00:24:37,959 --> 00:24:40,743
(PC)
Quick!! Put another picture of a kid's family on there!!
648
00:24:40,743 --> 00:24:43,327
(RD)
We do, and sure enough the machine produces
649
00:24:43,327 --> 00:24:43,926
another batch of rainbows.
650
00:24:43,926 --> 00:24:46,659
(PC)
Aw man...I can't believe we're going to
651
00:24:46,659 --> 00:24:47,921
pony hell for nothing.
652
00:24:47,921 --> 00:24:49,545
(RD)
So given the new circumstances,
653
00:24:49,545 --> 00:24:51,409
you guys and all the other kids go home
654
00:24:51,409 --> 00:24:52,425
to your families.
655
00:24:52,425 --> 00:24:53,709
Where you're allowed to take happy pictures,
656
00:24:53,709 --> 00:24:55,241
that are then fed into a horrible machine
657
00:24:55,241 --> 00:24:57,910
for the nefarious purposes of the government.
658
00:24:57,910 --> 00:25:01,335
Also politicians celebrate by
lowering taxes for the rich.
659
00:25:01,335 --> 00:25:02,948
Yay government!!
660
00:25:02,948 --> 00:25:03,648
So...
661
00:25:03,648 --> 00:25:04,711
The End!
662
00:25:05,651 --> 00:25:08,918
Subtitles Created/edited By:
@yahooeny--Enoch Kim
暉庭 王
musickat2199--Laurel
663
00:25:10,178 --> 00:25:12,827
We apologize for any mistakes and other things we did wrong
when subtitling the video.
664
00:25:14,417 --> 00:25:16,877
But if we did good, tell us in the comments!!!
665
00:25:19,867 --> 00:25:22,398
(｡◕‿◕｡) (｡◕‿◕｡) (｡◕‿◕｡)