WEBVTT 00:00:00.635 --> 00:00:02.191 (Half bell) 00:00:05.239 --> 00:00:12.416 (Bell) 00:00:30.191 --> 00:00:31.513 When I am angry, 00:00:31.513 --> 00:00:35.018 how do I let my anger out? 00:00:36.731 --> 00:00:39.731 How to let my anger out? 00:00:46.037 --> 00:00:49.389 Do you think that your anger has come from the outside, went in, 00:00:49.511 --> 00:00:52.535 and now you want to let it out again? 00:00:52.919 --> 00:00:56.044 Are you sure that the anger is coming from the outside? 00:00:59.831 --> 00:01:02.067 That is a counter question. 00:01:02.072 --> 00:01:03.844 (Laughter) 00:01:12.567 --> 00:01:15.530 In Plum Village, we learn 00:01:16.466 --> 00:01:20.645 how to deal with our anger, 00:01:22.210 --> 00:01:25.560 how to take care of our anger. 00:01:33.607 --> 00:01:38.034 Anger is not something pleasant. 00:01:39.343 --> 00:01:40.889 It is like the mud. 00:01:42.246 --> 00:01:43.835 But without the mud, 00:01:44.041 --> 00:01:46.256 we cannot grow lotus flowers. 00:01:47.687 --> 00:01:51.706 So the mud is useful, somehow... 00:01:52.125 --> 00:01:55.559 so your anger is useful, somehow. 00:01:56.927 --> 00:02:01.655 So, maybe you should not let it out. 00:02:03.454 --> 00:02:05.720 You should not throw it away. 00:02:06.445 --> 00:02:08.842 If you know how to make good use 00:02:09.083 --> 00:02:10.519 of your anger, 00:02:10.568 --> 00:02:14.424 you can grow the lotus of peace, 00:02:15.054 --> 00:02:18.160 of joy, of forgiveness. 00:02:19.957 --> 00:02:23.778 This is a very deep teaching in Plum Village. 00:02:24.887 --> 00:02:26.771 We have been learning about this. 00:02:29.500 --> 00:02:32.948 Anger comes "up" -- 00:02:33.271 --> 00:02:36.036 not from the outside, but from inside. 00:02:39.097 --> 00:02:43.715 Because we do not understand, 00:02:45.236 --> 00:02:48.643 that is why we cannot love. 00:02:52.798 --> 00:02:56.927 And, if we look deeply, 00:02:57.787 --> 00:02:59.681 if we listen deeply, 00:03:00.218 --> 00:03:03.011 we'll be able to understand. 00:03:03.529 --> 00:03:05.086 And, when we understand, 00:03:05.086 --> 00:03:06.267 there is love. 00:03:06.267 --> 00:03:07.716 And when there is love, 00:03:07.716 --> 00:03:11.466 anger just transforms itself. 00:03:11.947 --> 00:03:13.782 You don't have to take anger 00:03:14.573 --> 00:03:16.596 and throw it away. 00:03:18.907 --> 00:03:23.084 In fact, anger is something that you can use. 00:03:24.493 --> 00:03:28.246 And, if you hold that anger 00:03:28.473 --> 00:03:32.147 in understanding, in compassion, 00:03:32.520 --> 00:03:36.786 then, anger becomes something like love... 00:03:37.192 --> 00:03:40.703 like compassion. 00:03:44.036 --> 00:03:46.294 I will give you an example. 00:03:48.998 --> 00:03:51.026 The other fellow, this morning, 00:03:51.026 --> 00:03:53.442 said something unkind to you. 00:03:55.389 --> 00:03:58.149 He did something or he said something unkind to you, 00:03:58.149 --> 00:03:59.295 and you suffered. 00:03:59.328 --> 00:04:01.203 And, anger is coming up. 00:04:03.282 --> 00:04:04.334 And, usually, 00:04:04.334 --> 00:04:06.579 if you are not good practitioner, 00:04:06.632 --> 00:04:12.415 you want to give that boy or that girl a punch, 00:04:14.256 --> 00:04:15.814 to punish him or her. 00:04:16.054 --> 00:04:18.729 And that is anger "in" us. 00:04:20.976 --> 00:04:22.868 And that anger is a kind of mud 00:04:23.973 --> 00:04:25.575 to smear everything. 00:04:26.565 --> 00:04:28.554 So, we need to be aware that 00:04:28.578 --> 00:04:33.743 we have to control that mud of anger 00:04:34.722 --> 00:04:38.210 and do not let the mud to smear us 00:04:38.558 --> 00:04:39.989 and the other person. 00:04:46.337 --> 00:04:48.664 So, you might like to breathe in, 00:04:50.294 --> 00:04:52.254 calmly, mindfully, 00:04:52.314 --> 00:04:54.956 and look at that boy or girl. 00:04:59.323 --> 00:05:01.669 And, what do you see 00:05:02.049 --> 00:05:03.419 in him or in her? 00:05:03.745 --> 00:05:05.684 You see that there is a violence in him. 00:05:06.746 --> 00:05:08.667 There is anger, suffering in him 00:05:10.439 --> 00:05:11.814 or in her. 00:05:12.034 --> 00:05:14.801 If that boy or girl is happy, 00:05:14.992 --> 00:05:19.697 he or she would not have said something 00:05:19.890 --> 00:05:20.931 mean like that. 00:05:21.372 --> 00:05:24.374 He or she wouldn't have done something violent like that. 00:05:26.384 --> 00:05:31.245 But, he does not have the happiness in him. 00:05:32.245 --> 00:05:34.607 That is why he suffers. 00:05:35.025 --> 00:05:36.616 And, when he suffers like that, 00:05:37.147 --> 00:05:39.818 he wants to get his suffering out, 00:05:40.225 --> 00:05:42.011 by saying something mean to you, 00:05:42.266 --> 00:05:44.623 or doing something unkind to you. 00:05:45.022 --> 00:05:46.773 And, he thinks that, by doing so, 00:05:46.815 --> 00:05:48.118 he will suffer less. 00:05:48.690 --> 00:05:51.045 That is not very intelligent. 00:05:51.686 --> 00:05:53.385 So, when you look and you see that 00:05:54.012 --> 00:05:56.224 that boy is unhappy, 00:05:56.292 --> 00:05:58.213 there is anger or violence in him, 00:05:58.222 --> 00:06:00.189 and he does not know how to handle 00:06:00.189 --> 00:06:03.905 the violence in him, the unhappiness in him, 00:06:04.169 --> 00:06:05.769 that is why he suffers. 00:06:05.934 --> 00:06:07.674 And, when he suffers like that, 00:06:07.674 --> 00:06:09.364 it is natural that he makes people 00:06:09.660 --> 00:06:12.141 around him suffer like that. 00:06:12.409 --> 00:06:15.000 So, when you see the anger in him or in her, 00:06:15.150 --> 00:06:17.586 and you understand 00:06:18.711 --> 00:06:19.969 that anger... 00:06:19.969 --> 00:06:22.285 you are no longer angry at him. 00:06:22.357 --> 00:06:25.524 Poor little boy. Poor little girl. 00:06:26.109 --> 00:06:27.554 They suffer. 00:06:27.647 --> 00:06:30.477 I don't want to punish him, 00:06:32.495 --> 00:06:34.315 to make him suffer more. 00:06:35.382 --> 00:06:38.673 I want to make him suffer less. 00:06:39.165 --> 00:06:41.020 And, you smile to him. . 00:06:41.266 --> 00:06:43.903 You say: "Dear friend, I know that you suffer." 00:06:44.524 --> 00:06:45.787 "I am not angry at you," 00:06:45.787 --> 00:06:47.527 "even if you have said something" 00:06:47.549 --> 00:06:48.716 "like that to me." 00:06:48.860 --> 00:06:51.236 "Even if you have done something like that to me." 00:06:51.476 --> 00:06:53.859 "Because you suffer a lot." 00:06:55.483 --> 00:06:57.251 "So, I do not blame you." 00:06:57.254 --> 00:06:58.834 "I am not angry at you." 00:06:58.914 --> 00:07:00.639 "I am breathing in and out." 00:07:00.732 --> 00:07:02.772 "I understand you." 00:07:02.814 --> 00:07:05.986 "That is why I am not angry at you." 00:07:06.143 --> 00:07:07.976 "I do not suffer." 00:07:08.099 --> 00:07:10.494 You are a good practitioner. 00:07:10.729 --> 00:07:12.178 And, he will be amazed. 00:07:13.127 --> 00:07:16.114 Other people will react differently. 00:07:17.592 --> 00:07:20.262 They will hit him or tell him 00:07:20.546 --> 00:07:22.142 something very mean. 00:07:22.341 --> 00:07:24.190 But you are not doing that. 00:07:24.507 --> 00:07:26.995 You are reacting in a very different way; 00:07:27.827 --> 00:07:31.005 with tenderness, with loving kindness, 00:07:31.379 --> 00:07:32.521 ...smiles. 00:07:34.578 --> 00:07:36.445 And, he will be amazed. 00:07:36.960 --> 00:07:38.803 And, one day, he will ask you: 00:07:39.176 --> 00:07:40.588 "How can you do that?!" 00:07:41.187 --> 00:07:42.567 "When someone said something" 00:07:42.914 --> 00:07:45.289 "very brutal, very mean," 00:07:45.900 --> 00:07:49.382 "and did something violent like that" 00:07:49.643 --> 00:07:52.078 "and you can still keep your calm," 00:07:52.387 --> 00:07:53.416 "your peace." 00:07:55.736 --> 00:07:56.656 "How?!" 00:07:56.656 --> 00:07:59.037 And, then, you tell him, you tell her 00:07:59.037 --> 00:08:01.864 how you have come to Plum Village 00:08:02.142 --> 00:08:05.069 and learn that kind of mindful breathing, 00:08:05.763 --> 00:08:07.896 and recognize the anger in yourself, 00:08:07.896 --> 00:08:09.828 and recognize anger in you 00:08:09.849 --> 00:08:12.649 and in that person. 00:08:14.162 --> 00:08:20.177 So, you come here as a very young people, 00:08:20.876 --> 00:08:23.187 and we learn these wonderful things. 00:08:23.537 --> 00:08:25.673 And, you might be able to share that 00:08:25.702 --> 00:08:26.874 with your friends, 00:08:27.194 --> 00:08:29.416 when you go back to school. 00:08:32.282 --> 00:08:34.222 That is also a good question. 00:08:42.005 --> 00:08:43.739 (Half bell) 00:08:47.870 --> 00:08:55.020 (Bell)