-So when you’re at 
home,

can you run down

to the kitchen
in your underpants

in the middle of the night
if you’re hungry?

-I mean,
I could. I don’t.

-You don’t?
-No

-Is there someone

in the kitchen at all times,

like if you wanted
a sandwich in the night,

would you have to
wake someone up?

-Yeah, I wouldn’t
wake someone up

to have a sandwich.

-You’re allowed to go
in the refrigerator

on your own?
-I am! I am!

There’s a refrigerator
there’s silverware.

-When was the last time

you actually cooked?
-Now, it’s been a while

since I cooked.
It has been a while,

I won’t lie about that.
-Do you ever drive?

-I cannot drive.
I mean,

I’m able to drive.
-Is that because

you don’t have
your birth certificate?

-Yeah, exactly!
In Kenya,

we drive
on the other side of the road.

Actually,
the last time I drove,

a former staffer came by
and then he comes

through the South Lawn,
and he’s got

one of these new electric cars…
At the time,

they were new.
And he was very excited about it,

and I said,
“Well, let’s try it out.”

So I just grabbed

his keys and we just go out,

it’s parked right in front.

And I start circling

the South Lawn and the Secret Service

“No matter what you do,
do not let him out”.

And they were pretty upset, so…

-They call you Renegade, right?
-Yeah, yeah.

-Because you’re touring around

in an electric car.
Topping speeds

of 30 miles an hour.
-Yeah, yeah.

I think, we have 35, yeah.

-If you have to go to the dentist,

do you go to the dentist or does the…

-No, the dentist comes to me.
-Dentist comes to you.

You have the chair,
the tools

and you spit on the floor.

-I’ve got the chair,
everything is all there, set up.

-Everything is there?
-Yeah, in the basement.

I didn’t know.
I showed up, I said,

“You know, 
I think I’ve got a cap that’s loose”.

“Sir, here we are”, he said.
-Do you reset the clocks

with Daylight saving time?
-No

-What happens?
-Somebody else does that for me.

-Somebody does that for you.
Will you get rid of daylight saving time?

Or at least, get rid of the part
where we have to wake up earlier.

You can leave the other one.
-Well see, this is a California thing

‘cause you guys are always getting sun.
-Yeah.

-In the East coast, 
you don’t mind loosing that hour,

because,
that’s the signal that spring is here.

-We only care about ourselves.
-Yeah.

-Hi, I’m Jimmy Kimmel. 
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