WEBVTT 00:00:00.720 --> 00:00:02.312 [Music and applause] 00:00:07.502 --> 00:00:08.988 Oh, thank you so much. 00:00:08.988 --> 00:00:12.708 This is so exciting for me this evening, taping a television show and everything. 00:00:12.708 --> 00:00:13.999 It's always a thrill. 00:00:13.999 --> 00:00:15.210 I love doing TV. 00:00:15.210 --> 00:00:19.019 I was recently on a show called "Star Search", heard of it? 00:00:19.019 --> 00:00:20.699 [applause] 00:00:20.699 --> 00:00:22.529 But actually I wasn't on the real Star Search, 00:00:22.529 --> 00:00:25.278 I was on Star Search International. 00:00:25.278 --> 00:00:28.589 Because I'm so very international. 00:00:28.589 --> 00:00:33.024 They had a real problem with me because I look this way, but I talk this way. 00:00:33.024 --> 00:00:35.574 [laughter] 00:00:35.574 --> 00:00:38.154 That was like a problem and they're trying to be sensitive about it. 00:00:38.154 --> 00:00:41.910 They're like, "Margaret, we don't want you to take this the wrong way but 00:00:41.910 --> 00:00:45.071 could you be a little more, oh I don't know, Chinese"? 00:00:45.071 --> 00:00:47.595 [laughter] 00:00:47.595 --> 00:00:50.208 Well, actually I'm Korean. 00:00:50.208 --> 00:00:51.878 "Whatever." 00:00:51.878 --> 00:00:53.592 [laughter] 00:00:53.592 --> 00:00:57.155 I was supposed to go on this show and tell jokes, what was I supposed to do? 00:00:57.155 --> 00:01:08.359 Oh, my husband is so fat, that when he sit around the [unintelligible] 00:01:08.359 --> 00:01:10.448 he really sit around the [unintelligible]. 00:01:10.448 --> 00:01:11.598 [laughter] 00:01:11.598 --> 00:01:12.678 Gong. 00:01:12.678 --> 00:01:18.242 I don't go to church anymore, and my grandmother follows me around 00:01:18.242 --> 00:01:24.188 "Margaret, Margaret, how come you don't go to church?" 00:01:24.188 --> 00:01:29.636 "You have many friends at church." [snoring] 00:01:29.636 --> 00:01:32.160 [laughter] 00:01:32.160 --> 00:01:39.605 [snoring] Bingo! 00:01:39.605 --> 00:01:43.586 [laughter and applause] 00:01:51.789 --> 00:01:56.810 My mother is convinced that everybody in show business does drugs. 00:01:56.810 --> 00:02:01.705 She's like, "Oh you cannot go to the club because they take the drugs." 00:02:01.705 --> 00:02:08.422 "Those people they take the cocaines and then they take the D, the D, the D." 00:02:08.422 --> 00:02:09.920 Mom, it's LSD. 00:02:09.920 --> 00:02:11.193 "How do you know that?" 00:02:11.193 --> 00:02:13.474 [laughter] 00:02:13.474 --> 00:02:16.938 My mother really wants me to get married but I don't know if that gonna happen soon. 00:02:16.938 --> 00:02:18.359 I have trouble with men. 00:02:18.359 --> 00:02:20.343 Do you ever go out with somebody and you like them so much, 00:02:20.343 --> 00:02:21.907 you like them so much, you like them so much, 00:02:21.907 --> 00:02:24.085 you like them so much, you like them so much, 00:02:24.085 --> 00:02:29.379 and then they do something, and then you don't like anymore? 00:02:29.379 --> 00:02:31.032 I went out with this guy recently. 00:02:31.032 --> 00:02:32.462 I liked him so much, I liked him so much, 00:02:32.462 --> 00:02:33.772 I like him so much, I like him so much, 00:02:33.772 --> 00:02:36.882 we went out and we went dancing and he started moon walking 00:02:36.882 --> 00:02:43.842 around me [audience laughs] and I didn't like him anymore. 00:02:43.842 --> 00:02:46.503 [laughter] 00:02:46.503 --> 00:02:48.839 I dated one guy who said that if I broke up with him that he would 00:02:48.839 --> 00:02:52.462 kill himself, and I broke up with him but he's not dead yet. 00:02:52.462 --> 00:02:54.772 [laughter] 00:02:54.772 --> 00:02:57.134 And I want to call him up and go, "You know, what's the deal?" 00:02:57.134 --> 00:03:00.615 [laughter] 00:03:00.615 --> 00:03:02.105 I thought we had a agreement. 00:03:02.105 --> 00:03:04.685 [laughter and applause] 00:03:07.450 --> 00:03:09.407 I love being her in Montreal, it's a beautiful city. 00:03:09.407 --> 00:03:12.527 I travel a lot, I like traveling but I get kind of nervous when I go 00:03:12.527 --> 00:03:16.165 to places where there aren't a lot of Asians like Alabama. 00:03:16.165 --> 00:03:18.692 [laughter] 00:03:18.692 --> 00:03:21.445 I was in Mobile Alabama, I was walking down the street and this man actually 00:03:21.445 --> 00:03:23.839 called me a "chink". 00:03:23.839 --> 00:03:28.407 I mean he actually called me a chink - I was so mad I just looked at him 00:03:28.407 --> 00:03:33.646 and I said, "Chink? I'm sorry Chinks are Chinese, I'm Korean, I'm a gook alright." 00:03:33.646 --> 00:03:35.819 [laughter] 00:03:35.819 --> 00:03:40.061 If you're going to be racist, at least learn the terminology. 00:03:40.061 --> 00:03:42.530 Get like a redneck to English dictionary. 00:03:42.530 --> 00:03:45.225 [laughter and applause] 00:03:53.080 --> 00:03:56.280 I think that racism is the biggest disadvantage to being Asian in 00:03:56.280 --> 00:04:00.597 America but if I was to choose, I think the biggest advantage to being 00:04:00.597 --> 00:04:03.857 Asian in America is that if you're at an airport or a bar or something, 00:04:03.857 --> 00:04:06.406 and somebody comes up and talks to you, and you don't want to talk 00:04:06.406 --> 00:04:10.019 to them you can just pretend you don't speak English. 00:04:10.019 --> 00:04:12.715 "Oh no, I don't know." 00:04:12.715 --> 00:04:14.240 [laughter] 00:04:14.240 --> 00:04:15.540 Thank you very much. 00:04:15.540 --> 00:04:16.977 [music and applause]