1
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Ooh!

2
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Why does he look like a Mumford & Son?

3
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
No!

4
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Looks like your dad.

5
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Swipe right!

6
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Oh, no, Tracy,

7
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
if this is what dating is like,

8
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
you needa buy me 30 cats,

9
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
because I'm dying alone.

10
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- You are so ridiculous,

11
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
they're not all bad,

12
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
like, look, what about him?

13
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Look at that!

14
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
I know, but look at his interests,

15
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
he likes Star Wars.

16
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
I'm not dating a nerd.

17
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- That just means he likes Star Wars,

18
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
that doesn't make you a nerd.

19
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
A lotta people like Star Wars.

20
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- I know, but he puts it as his interest,

21
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
like, if you love a movie that much,

22
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
it's a little overboard.

23
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Really?

24
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
What do you think about this?

25
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- (gasps) That's from my childhood.

26
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
I'm very nostalgic.

27
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- That why you're wearing overalls?

28
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Yes.

29
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Okay, how about this guy?

30
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
He likes sports, he's a King's fan,

31
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
he seems normal.

32
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- He seems great, swipe right.

33
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Its a match!

34
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Oh, you both die alone, probably.

35
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Okay, I have to ask,

36
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
you didn't have the beard 
in your profile picture,

37
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
when did you grow that?

38
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- I been growin' this puppy out ever since

39
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
my King's made the playoffs,

40
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
just for luck, ya know?

41
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Okay.

42
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
You have any other superstitions?

43
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- I wear the same pair of boxers I wore

44
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
last time we won the Stanley Cup,

45
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
and I don't shower.

46
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Oh.


47
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- (gulping)
- Seriously?

48
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- (low belch) Let's get one more!

49
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Okay, Sports was the best,

50
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
how 'bout this guy?

51
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
He likes art.

52
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
He's an adult!

53
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- This red, white and blue penis

54
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
represents the patriarchal American
oppression of other nations.

55
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Is that that guy from that TV show?

56
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- I really like the Big Bang Theory.

57
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Yikes.

58
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
This guy seems normal.

59
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- I really wanted to list more 
of my interests,

60
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
but evidently, they have a rule against

61
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
furries and big jugs.

62
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Like, I'm just really into furries
and big jugs.

63
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Check, please.

64
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Okay, I'll try the Star Wars guy,

65
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
I mean, how bad could he be?

66
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
(harp flourish)

67
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
(guttural moan)

68
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Oh, I, nope.

69
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
No.

70
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Oh, God, what have I gotten myself into?

71
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
(light jazz)

72
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Lisa, right?

73
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Yeah.

74
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- I'm Tyler.

75
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Hi.

76
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Oh, God, I'm so sorry I'm late.

77
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- That's okay.

78
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
But look, before we go any further,

79
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
I feel like I need to tell you,

80
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
I've never seen Star Wars before
and I feel really weird about it,

81
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
so, I'm sorry?

82
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- This is about my profile, right?

83
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Yeah.

84
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Okay, ah,

85
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
I like the movies but they do not
define me at all.

86
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Okay.

87
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- You're an actress, right?

88
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Ah, yes, and I also own 
a children's theater.

89
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- No way, 


90
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
my mom's a high school drama teacher!

91
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- No way!

92
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- She's been doin' it forever,
like since I was a little kid.

93
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Aw, that's so cute.

94
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
(romantic music)

95
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Wyatt is a very cute dog.

96
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Thanks!

97
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Oh, gosh, it's almost five o'clock,
I totally lost track of time.

98
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
I need to go to therapy to ah, pilates!

99
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
I gotta go to pilates, so--

100
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Do you want me to walk you to your car?

101
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Yeah, that'd be nice.

102
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Alright, cool. Ladies first.

103
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
No, I don't think so,

104
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
he was nursing that glass of wine also,
that whole time we were there.

105
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
It's very strange.

106
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Very sad. This is me.

107
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Alright,

108
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
well, we should totally do this again,
I had a great time.

109
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- I did too, I'd like that.

110
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- So, I'll call you?

111
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Yeah.

112
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Have a good night.

113
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- 'Kay, you too.

114
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
(dramatic flourish)

115
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Shit! I'm in love with a Star Wars nerd!

116
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Next time:

117
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
This is Luke Skywalker.

118
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
He's trained to become a Jedi master by?

119
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Spock.

120
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- That's Star Trek.

121
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Gandalf!

122
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- That's Lord of the Rings.

123
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- Neil Armstrong.

124
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
- That's a real person.

125
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Did you graduate high school?