Dette er en test, hei,hei
This is in Shreve mind you - Shreve!!!!
They see a neighbor with a sign that says
"Worms for Sale!"
Jeff asks Uncle Jim where they get the worms from
Uncle Jim turns around and says
"His wife probably shits 'em!"
It's true!
Oh the shit that fucker used to say!
Still has them screaming
Oh, and the story about the original Zittooth
His son Timmy, Jeff and Joe's Cousin
Asked Uncle Jim
If he seen that motherfucker's teeth
Like anyone could miss that dude's mouthful of rocks
And Uncle Jim says
Christ those teeth look like hell!
Said Zittooth probably had to drain the infection with a fawcet
Oh, and the story 40 years ago at his own brother Jerry's funeral
They were all outside waiting on the hearse and someone farted like hell
Uncle Jim comes out of the home, sniffs, and said "Jesus Christ, who died?"
At his own brother's funeral for God's sake!
But seriously, I gotta tell you about Sheck - a grocery store in Shreve
That Jim and Yukie's deceased brother used to clean
Jim wanted to burn it down!
Mad as hell right there at the funeral home
Because he heard Sheck wouldn't pay Jerry's widow the money he owed them
It's true
Then Uncle Jim, he said........
Right there at the funeral that he'd take his Goddamned business elsewhere!
Bastard was fuming mad at Sheck
Then some 20 years later Jeff hears on the radio Shecks burned down - on the radio
Yeah, on the radio!
Oh that shit was priceless!
Uncle Jim was never implicated in the arson
Never even brought in for questioning
No one ever questioned him at all?
Oh hell no, he didn't come forward either
Hell knowing the pull Jim had in Shreve the fuckin' cops probably helped him gas it down
Blake probably was with him
Probably lit the match
His wife probably shits 'em!
Says that to a carload of elementary age kids
And has them laughing so hard they almost puke!