(man) Hi there, girl, can I Squirtle on your Jigglypuff?
(Ian) Shut up!
I can't wait to discover new Pokémon.
I just better make sure I don't walk in front of anyone while--
Damn it, I am not fighting anyone!
Oh, no, no, I wanted to give you a cool new move
that you could teach to your Pokémon.
It's called "fly."
You just teach it to any flying Pokémon
and you can ride it to any destination.
So you're telling me if I taught this to a tiny little
bird Pokémon, I could fly on its back or something?
Anything's possible with Pokémon.
(muttering) You freakin' jackass.
'Kay, now I can finally start my quest...
What the hell?
Wild MANKEY appeared!
Oh sweet, a wild Pokémon!
Mankey, extremely quick to anger.
You mean "Monkey"?
Mankey.
No, that's definitely a monkey.
- Mankey. - Whatever!
- You're going down, Monkey! - Mankey.
Go, Pikachu!
Pikachu.
All right, Pikachu! Use quick attack!
- Pika! - (Mankey chattering)
PIKACHU used QUICK ATTACK.
Critical hit!
- All right, Monkey... - Mankey.
Shut the f--k up!
All right, you're mine!
Damn it! But I'll get you this time!
20 Minutes Later
I'm bound to catch you sometime.
Wild MANKEY became bored.
Whatever, I didn't want you anyway.
That monkey may have tested my resolve,
but I'm not gonna let that discourage me from--
- Better not be another freakin' monkey! - Mankey.
Wild CHARIZARD appeared!
Whoa! We're not gonna let this one get away.
Quick, Pikachu, use AK-47 attack!
Pika?
(gun cocks)
Pika...chu!!!
(automatic gunfire, Charizard groaning)
It's super effective!
All right, I've got you this time, Charizard!
♪ (suspenseful music) ♪
Booya! CHARIZARD was caught!
Yeah!
Hey, you douchebag! I want a rematch!
Oh God, all right, Charizard, come out now!
(roars)
All right, Charizard, get us the hell out of here!
Use fly!
CHARIZARD cannot learn FLY.
But he has wings;
it's not like I'm trying to teach it to a freakin' monkey.
- Mankey. - (wings fluttering)
Whoo! Pidgey, f--k yeah! (laughs)
(Ian) To see bloopers from this video and more,
click the link in the description below!
Quick! Use subscribe attack by clicking the yellow button!
♪ (light cheerful tune) ♪
If this music is giving you a nostalgia-boner
that lasts longer than four hours,
contact your physician immediately.
It's bad. Happened to me once.