WEBVTT

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I don't know what the fuck I was thinking.

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I bring you to my house as a friend in my kitchen.

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You offered to make the tea.

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Naturally I said yes. You're my guest.

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So I take the offer gratefully.

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But then what I see makes my heart burst.

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You've only gone and put the fucking milk in first.

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NO! You must be out of your mind!

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Looks like you went and poured in about half a pint.

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Now don't forget the boiling water, my tea's already luke warm.

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Man where the fuck were you born.

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Nah, you destroyed a thing that was sacred.

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Pour it down the sink let me show you how to make it.

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Teabag in first. Pour the water on top.

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(Shut up man I will tell you when to stop)

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Then you need to know how much milk is required.

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Making assumptions on how I like it.

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Woah Woah Woah What you doing.

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Don't let the teabag sit there brewing.

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You gotta stir straight away don't stop.

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Or you a green skunk on the top.

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(I hate that stuff)

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Now you put my sugar in... What d'you leave it for?

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Didn't even stir it in you're unbelievable

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What d'you think it would disintergrate itself?

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bruv you need to go see a shrink and get some help.

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You chose the wrong person to mess with.

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Now go get me a Mother Fucking Digestive.

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Stay the hell away from my cup bitch

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don't even meddle with my kettle don't touch it.

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No go sit down, go watch telly

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and bring me back my teaspoon bruv you're not ready.