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>> We should all learn to love each other.

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Once I was in San Francisco, walking along the Golden Gate Bridge,

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and I saw this guy on the bridge about to jump.

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I thought I'd try to stall him, detain him, long enough for me to put the film in.

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I said, "Don't jump!"

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And he turns.

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You heard of the elephant man,

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he had the head like the head of a horse.

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My heart went out to him,

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and I said, "Why the long face? "

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He said, "All my life,

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people have called me cruel names like flicka, or trigger, silver,

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chess piece." I says, "Well,

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don't worry about it, Ed.

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They can't be that bad." He said, "Oh yeah? How would you

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like to go through your whole life as a freak?"

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I said, "Well. " He said, "Well,

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you're a bad example."

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I said, "Come on,

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you're not the only person in this world sad over their few problems.

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Don't be mule-headed. Stop horsing around,

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and get down from there, you silly mini."

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He said, "Why go on? In a 100 years,

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the planet will be uninhabitable.

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In 10 million years the sun will burn out.

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In a 100 billion years all matter will disintegrate from the universe."

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I said, "Perhaps,

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but in the meantime, in-between time.

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Besides, you're forgetting about God."

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He said, "How do you know there's a God?"

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I said, "Of course there is a God.

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Do you think billions of years ago a bunch of

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molecules floating around at random without rhyme or

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reason could someday have had the sense of humor to make you

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look like that?"

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He said, "I used to believe in God."

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I said, "That's good.

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Were you a Christian or a Jew?"

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He said, "A Christian."

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I said, "Me too.

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Protestant or Catholic?"

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He said, "Protestant."

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I said, "Me too.

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What franchise?"

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He said, "Baptist."

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I said, "Me too.

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Northern Baptist or a Southern Baptist?"

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He said, "Northern Baptist."

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I said, "Me too.

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Northern Conservative Baptist or Northern Liberal Baptist?"

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He said, "Northern conservative Baptist."

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I said, "Me too.

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Northern conservative fundamentalist Baptist to Northern Conservative Reformed Baptist?"

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He says, "Northern conservative fundamentalist Baptist."

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I said, "Me too.

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North conservative fundamentalist Baptist Great Lakes region

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or Northern conservative fundamentalist Baptist Eastern region?"

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He said, "Northern conservative fundamentalist Baptist Great Lakes region."

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I said, "Me too.

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Northern conservative fundamentalist Baptist Great Lakes region Council of 1879,

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or Northern Conservative fundamentalist Baptist Great Lakes region council of 1912?"

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He said, "Northern Conservative Fundamentals part because

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Great Lakes region council of 1912."

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I said, "Die, you heretic!"

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And I pushed him off.