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(bell)

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(bell)

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(bell)

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Dear Respected Thay, dear Respected Elders, dear brothers and sisters, dear community,

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Good morning

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Today is October 12th, 2017.

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We're in the Great Meditation Hall

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at Magnolia Grove Monastery

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on the third day of the Magnolia Grove

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US Tour Retreat entitled

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Peace in Oneself, Peace in the World

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Can everyone hear okay?

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Okay.

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I hope everyone has had a chance

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to settle in

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become acclimated to the changing climate

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It's usually nice to be at the monastery

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for at least 3 to 4 days

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because it takes time for the body

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and the mind to really shift gears

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from the speed and the pace outside

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and sometimes if we don't allow

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our body and mind to settle

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we continue to run in the monastery

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So I hope you've taken conscientious step

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to slow down and enjoy

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the slower pace here

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the nothing-to-doness here

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the brothers and sisters are taking care

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of everything.

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so that we can have this space

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to really stop and look more deeply.

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Yesterday we were very fortunate

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to bathe in very beautiful bath of Dharma

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by Sister Chan Duc.

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And in her talk

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we learn about pleasant,

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neutral, and mixed feelings.

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I'm very aware right now

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that in this big hall

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there's not a single mosquito

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biting me right now.

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(audience laugh)

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and that neutral feeling

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is actually a very pleasant feeling.

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We can touch the practices of mindfulness

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in very concrete ways,

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in moment to moment

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of our daily life.

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If we look with

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the eyes of a practitioner

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there's always a chance for us

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to explore our mind

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explore the minds of others,

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come to a deeper understanding.

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So today...

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I'd like to go further into

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the practice of peace

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We learnt yesterday that

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peace comes from above all,

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from awareness of our pleasant feelings,

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awareness of our neutral feelings,

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and just from that awareness

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grows the nourishment.

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Happiness can grow from

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just being aware.

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We also know that

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we are not just made of,

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we don't just experience

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pleasant and neutral feelings.

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We are a whole spectrum.

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We also have quite unpleasant feelings

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sometimes.

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Uhm.

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And the practice of peace,

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being peace within oneself

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is not just to be with

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our pleasant and neutral feelings

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but learning how to engage with

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relate to

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and transform those

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unpleasant feelings as well.

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So the practice of peace

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is the spirit of peace

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which we relate to those

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icky mosquitoes

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those pesky conversations,

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those irritations.

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And it plays out in

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the social sphere.

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We are very aware that what we do here

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is not just for our small, insular selves,

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not even just for our family,

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but it has a great impact out in society.

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Our capacity to

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take care of those uncomfortable things

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that come our way

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gives us strength to face

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confront and help to transform

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engage in

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those things that are much larger

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much more troublesome

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out there in society.

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So peaceful confrontation is actually

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an actuality, a possibility,

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if we put our energy of practice into it.

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A number of years ago on a

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it was one of our US tours

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We made [inaudible] to our neighbours

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up North in Canada.

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I remember a particular incident that

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always stay with me.

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It's about peaceful confrontation.

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A number of us were on an afternoon

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We had a kind of a lazy day

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when we weren't engaged in a Dharma

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a retreat.

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So we were taking a walk out on town.

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And it was number of brothers and sisters

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together.

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And there was a gentleman

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who was starting to follow

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follow us.

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And he was engaging in speech

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that was a little bit of a...

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inquisitive, not necessarily negative,

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but a little bit provocative.

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And he started to follow.

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And in particular, he started to...

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tried to engage the sisters

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in the group.

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This went on for maybe, probably

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half a block or a block.

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And because the sisters weren't reacting

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We were trying our best not to react

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to this kind of provocation.

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It started escalating.

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It was touching something in him

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so he started getting a little pushy

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a little aggressive.

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And one of our brothers

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in the group

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When he realised what was happening,

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very quickly, but very kindly,

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the energy was confrontatory but

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peaceful, not angry at all.

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He turned to the man

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and, "Woo woo,"

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"We're just trying

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to have a peaceful walk here.

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I'm sure you can understand."

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The brothers and sisters

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continued to walk

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and he engaged

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the gentleman in that conversation

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of who we are, what we are about,

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why we are wearing brown.

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I'm sure in his heart

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he has intentions, good intention

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to know what in the world

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is going on with all these brown

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and bald-headed people.

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But the way that

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he was engaging with us,

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it was quite uncomfortable.

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And so

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That image of that brother

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taking that action

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very peacefully

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stayed with me.

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And for me it's an example of

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how, if we are from

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a place of peace, of clarity

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we can engage in action that

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has a positive effect,

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that doesn't escalate the matter.

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And it's a way forward for both

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that gentleman and for us.

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So this is

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Today's talk is dedicated to

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one of our favourite strong emotions.

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Out of fear, despair and anger,

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I decided to focus on anger today.

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So we know that

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working on anger is not just management.

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We hear that a lot sometimes,

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anger management.

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I want to emphasize that,

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working with, understanding our anger,

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is peace work.

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Peace work is anger work.

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Anger work is peace work.

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And it's important that we engage

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in this mud,

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because we as human beings

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we should give ourselves permission

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to be fully human,

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fallable, we make mistakes.

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We dig (?) into negative afflictions.

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And to acknowledge that, first of all,

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is a practice of loving kindness

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for ourselves and all of humanity.

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When we can begin to acknowledge

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that there is that seed of anger in us

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then that's the start of being

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able to be in peace

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with those parts of ourselves

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that are uncomfortable.

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So how many of us here

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has anger issues?

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Okay. That's kind of a hard term.

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So how about,

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how many of us have challenges

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with anger sometimes?

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Okay, a little bit more people.

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How many of us

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who know someone

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who has issues with anger?

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(audience laugh)

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Okay.

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So honestly most of us should be

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raising our hands at that point

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because as we learn from

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Buddhist psychology

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we all have all of these seeds

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positve and negative,

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wholesome or unwholesome.

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And it's just a matter of fact,

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reality to say

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Yes, I have anger in me.

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Yes, my loved one has anger in them.

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And yes sometimes I water that anger

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in them quite a lot.

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So this is a loving approach

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to this seed.

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So we acknowledge it

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in order to become more whole

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first of all.

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We also need to work on

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our anger as a practice

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because if we leave

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this particular seed untended

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it can have quite harmful effects.

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We already can see that,

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out in society,

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out in our relationship when we

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have arguments, conflicts,

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and they fester,

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We don't take care of our anger.

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We don't acknowledge

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the other person's anger.

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We see it in the political sphere.

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So we know that

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anger is a force to be reckoned with.

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And as an emotion,

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in Buddhism, we know its rightful place

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in our life.

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Maybe it's taking up quite a lot of space

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in our heart and mind right now.

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But the teachings point to a drawer

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that we can actually

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we can accurately put the emotion in.

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It is an emotion,

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our teacher would say.

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It is just an emotion.

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It's not to negate its power

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but to help us to begin to have a

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working loving relationship with anger.

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So for me I respect anger greatly.

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First of all because

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I can see how harmful it can be in me.

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It wreaks havocs in my peace of mind.

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Sometimes when I'm bit by anger,

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it takes quite a long time

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to come back to a place of stillness

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and clarify, loving kindness.

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And I see it in my relationship

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with others.

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When I touch someone with anger,

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you know you have to deal with

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the karma of that.

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So who wants that right?

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So it's something we respect

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because it has a power to effect

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very negatively the environment.

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But also we respect our emotions,

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we respect other people's emotions

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because it is a gateway

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into understanding ourselves more deeply.

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What is at the heart of what we value,

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what we hold dear,

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what we're afraid of.

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Anger is that gate that allows us

294
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to see ourselves,

295
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sometimes quite suddenly,

296
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more clearly.

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So today I'd like to invite us

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to gather the strength

299
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to look deeply at our own anger.

300
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Make it a personal thing.

301
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
This is your anger,

302
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
or your beloved one's anger.

303
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Actually probably it's your anger

304
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but if it's easier, let's just say,

305
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
your beloved one's anger.

306
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(audience laugh)

307
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Make it personal.

308
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And we take strength to look into this

309
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
because we are being nourished everyday

310
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
at this retreat with Dharma,

311
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
with awareness of

312
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
the positive and neutral.

313
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So we already have a foundation

314
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from which to take some strength

315
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
to now, shine the light

316
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
in our darker corner,

317
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
deeper corner.

318
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
And secondly, we take courage from

319
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
our aspiration to do well by the world

320
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
to do well by others.

321
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We take courage from the fact that

322
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everywhere in every corner

323
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
of this monastery

324
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
we have safe spaces

325
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
in our Dharma sharing circles

326
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
to engage in this acknowledgement

327
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
of who we are as whole human beings,

328
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
the anger, the joy,

329
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
the hope, the fear.

330
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
We're opening ourselves up

331
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
to who we are

332
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to be fully human.

333
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Okay, so anger is front and centre.

334
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So we're gonna put anger up

335
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on the pedestal to kind of

336
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a clump of clay (?)

337
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
and look at it.

338
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I think most of us know

339
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
what anger feels like.

340
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
So there's a couple of approaches

341
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
that I'd like to take.

342
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First of all, we will get into

343
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
how it feels like in our mind and body

344
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
but first of all, from a more

345
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
objective space.

346
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Take a step back and look at it,

347
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
kind of from a personal academic's way.

348
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Anger is what?

349
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Anger is a kind of feeling

350
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
unpleasant feeling first of all.

351
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And anger is an intense displeasure

352
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pointed towards, against

353
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
something that causes us something.

354
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Some big questions right?

355
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
So let me just write a few

356
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
of these phrases down.

357
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Intense displeasure

358
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aimed towards

359
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
so it's not sitting there but it's

360
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
coming out of you.

361
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
It's radiating out,

362
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
aimed at that thing or that person

363
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
or that situation that

364
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we perceive is hurting us,

365
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harming us,

366
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
offending us,

367
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
annoying us.

368
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Okay. So it's an intense displeasure

369
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
radiating out, aimed against

370
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
something that is causing us

371
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
some kind of blockage.

372
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
The question before is,

373
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
when we look deeply,

374
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what is it blocking?

375
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
We'll get back to that later.

376
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
What is it challenging

377
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
that causes us to kind of

378
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
swarmed up like a bee's nest.

379
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Okay.

380
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
So I... I don't know if anyone

381
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
ever has a callus

382
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
either on your food, your hand, right.

383
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
We know that in the body

384
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
the body has a way of dealing with pain,

385
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
sensitivities.

386
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For example, you get a splinter in

387
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
finger or your...

388
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Or I play the guitar so I...

389
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
when I play, the nerves underneath

390
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
are quite sensitive.

391
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
And over time,

392
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
a callus kind of is created above that

393
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
that sensitivity,

394
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
or that splinter,

395
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
or that corn in your foot.

396
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Underneath that hard part,

397
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
there is an area of sensitivity.

398
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
And I'd like to invite us to

399
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
reflect on anger

400
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
as this combination of

401
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
hardness,

402
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
or harshness, that callus.

403
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
And that underlying sensitivity,

404
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
what lies underneath?

405
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Again, that's the question.

406
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
We can see anger as a kind of habit energy

407
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
of reacting.

408
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
And it's a reaction because

409
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
we are trying to regain

410
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
or restore something that we have lost.

411
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Sometimes anger comes

412
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
from a place of fear, right?

413
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
I remember a friend of mine

414
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
in college.

415
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
She almost overdosed.

416
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
At that time I didn't know that

417
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
she was trying to block out pain.

418
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
I thought that she was trying

419
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
to commit suicide.

420
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
And I didn't understand why.

421
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
So when I heard that

422
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
she had almost overdosed and I...

423
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
What it touched in me was

424
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
that strong fear, that strong anger,

425
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
strong fear followed by anger.

426
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
And I confronted her with that question,

427
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
"How could you do that?"

428
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
"What were you thinking?"

429
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
And I learnt after that

430
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
that she wasn't trying to

431
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
harm or hurt herself.

432
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
She was just trying to block out

433
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
the pain with the pills.

434
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
And that was the only way she knew how.

435
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
But in that situation,

436
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
both she and I touched

437
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
desparation and fear.

438
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
And mine turned into anger.

439
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
And hers turned into trying to escape.

440
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
There's a relationship between

441
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
fear and anger sometimes.

442
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
If any of us are parents...

443
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
How many of us here are parents?

444
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Yeah. Do you ever get angry

445
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
at your children

446
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
because they've done something

447
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
that scared the beeheegeebee (?)

448
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
out of you?

449
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Right. That fear quickly can

450
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
turn into anger.

451
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
So this is a reaction that we need

452
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
to look at carefully,

453
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
to get at the roots of.

454
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
So fear is one side, one kind of push,

455
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
and anger, one kind of sensitivity.

456
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
This sensitivity here

457
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
what is underneath is

458
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
a fear.

459
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Fear something that...

460
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
It's feeling afraid

461
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
something in us that was secure

462
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
was no longer secure.

463
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
So underneath this harshness,

464
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
this prickliness of our anger

465
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
is also a sense of sense,

466
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
what we call it manas,

467
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
what we define as who we are,

468
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
what belongs to us,

469
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
I, me, mine.

470
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
And when that is threatened,

471
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
that can also give rise to anger, right?

472
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
How dare you cut in front of me

473
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
when I'm driving?

474
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
This lane belongs to me (laugh), right?

475
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Road rage is a very strange phenomenon

476
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
but when you look at it

477
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
in the light of a sense of self,

478
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
it becomes a little bit

479
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
more understandable.

480
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
How dare you take away from me?

481
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
That belongs to me.

482
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
How dare you challenge my view,

483
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
my view?

484
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
So it all has something to do with

485
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
our sense of self,

486
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
our pride,

487
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
what we feel entitled to.

488
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
Never mind about we actually are

489
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
entitled to it or not.

490
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
That's not the question.

491
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
As Dharma practitioner,

492
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
we focus on the facileness of our mind

493
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
in relationship to what is it

494
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
that is there.

495
99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999
We talk about right action later okay? 25:30