WEBVTT 00:00:18.247 --> 00:00:22.399 STV Film company 00:00:23.247 --> 00:00:26.364 in co-production with Nicola Film 00:00:27.327 --> 00:00:29.318 present 00:00:41.127 --> 00:00:43.641 Alexei BULDAKOV 00:00:45.247 --> 00:00:47.886 Victor BYCHKOV 00:00:49.327 --> 00:00:51.966 Semyon STRUGACHEV 00:00:53.487 --> 00:00:55.047 Serghei RUSSKIN 00:00:57.647 --> 00:00:59.241 Serghei GUSINSKY 00:00:59.635 --> 00:01:03.571 - So what's up with our "Eagle"? - Most likely he's drinking vodka. 00:01:03.710 --> 00:01:06.048 Under a roof in a warm company. 00:01:06.457 --> 00:01:08.957 But that was you who asked him to stay by. 00:01:09.120 --> 00:01:10.086 "Eagle"! 00:01:10.265 --> 00:01:13.859 In such a weather a good master won't let his dog out. 00:01:14.016 --> 00:01:15.550 That's right, a dog. 00:01:15.716 --> 00:01:17.852 "Eagle"! Respond to Semyonov. 00:01:21.127 --> 00:01:23.402 in the film 00:01:24.873 --> 00:01:28.873 PECULIARITIES OF NATIONAL FISHING 00:01:36.189 --> 00:01:39.193 Hello, Mikhalych, is it you? Mikhalych, give me a hand, l've broken down. 00:01:40.243 --> 00:01:42.179 Gotcha. We're on our way. 00:01:42.758 --> 00:01:44.430 O.K. I'm getting ready. 00:01:55.798 --> 00:01:57.140 Stop! Come on! Come here! 00:01:59.639 --> 00:02:02.687 - Give me the end! Come on! Why do you dawdling? - Here, that's it. 00:02:02.919 --> 00:02:03.917 Alright! Come on! 00:02:16.280 --> 00:02:19.460 Mikhalych, I'm ready. You just pull off gently from the place. 00:02:20.360 --> 00:02:23.274 l can't hear a thing. We'll get you there, don't worry! 00:02:24.961 --> 00:02:27.737 Hell of a weather. Great for fishing! 00:02:28.201 --> 00:02:31.337 You should take the stuff out of the back for I can't see a thing. 00:02:31.681 --> 00:02:34.303 That's OK. Let's go. We're already late as it is. 00:02:36.121 --> 00:02:37.293 l don't get it. 00:02:38.521 --> 00:02:39.751 What's going on? 00:02:40.694 --> 00:02:41.866 l don't get it. 00:02:43.162 --> 00:02:45.844 Mikhalych! Who is it that you are towing? 00:02:45.996 --> 00:02:47.880 You're not towing me! 00:02:48.522 --> 00:02:50.962 l can't hear a thing! Are you standing still? 00:02:52.642 --> 00:02:55.734 - He says he's standing still. - We're on the move, alright. 00:02:56.363 --> 00:02:58.247 So if he wants we can go a little faster. 00:03:02.443 --> 00:03:03.841 What cow? 00:03:05.963 --> 00:03:07.951 Eagle, has the general gone by? 00:03:08.964 --> 00:03:11.878 We don't understand - what cow? 00:03:12.644 --> 00:03:15.992 Oh, I got him. The general is bringing you a cow as a present. 00:03:17.124 --> 00:03:20.472 - What do l need a cow for? - You haven't got yours back yet. 00:03:20.953 --> 00:03:23.515 I'd rather had an ostrich or a monkey. 00:03:23.614 --> 00:03:26.302 Keeping exotic animals are more fashionable now. 00:03:26.515 --> 00:03:29.381 Here is our Constable Kiryukhin has got himself a koala bear. 00:03:29.494 --> 00:03:32.566 Now he is planting eucalyptus trees for his koala on the plot of land. 00:03:32.658 --> 00:03:35.496 They - Koalas - love eucalyptus leaves badly. 00:03:35.565 --> 00:03:38.139 Of course, Kiryukhin tried to soak 00:03:38.302 --> 00:03:40.876 our domestic birch tree leaves in eucalyptus liqueur, 00:03:41.026 --> 00:03:42.398 but the koala wouldn't have any of it. 00:03:42.806 --> 00:03:44.794 Yes, Russia still got a hundred years' worth of idiots 00:03:47.726 --> 00:03:49.966 up its sleeve, thank God. 00:04:08.528 --> 00:04:11.750 They are coming. And with a cow, for real. I thought, I heard wrong. 00:04:17.648 --> 00:04:19.784 - Hi. - Welcome. 00:04:21.129 --> 00:04:23.569 - Mikhalych. - Hi, Kuzmich. 00:04:24.299 --> 00:04:25.723 So how is it here? 00:04:25.789 --> 00:04:28.849 lt's O.K. A bream has gone but there's plenty of carps and salmons! 00:04:28.905 --> 00:04:30.943 Good day, General! 00:04:31.178 --> 00:04:34.508 - You didn't need to bring it here. - We couldn't leave it on the road. 00:04:34.560 --> 00:04:37.410 - I grudge leaving it 'cause it's a good one. What is her name? - Ford. 00:04:37.650 --> 00:04:40.422 Original. That's what we called our Sergeant Vasilyuk. 00:04:40.500 --> 00:04:43.770 He wore black shirts 'cause he truly believed 00:04:43.998 --> 00:04:45.938 they need laundry less often. 00:04:48.371 --> 00:04:49.485 Unbelievable mysticism. 00:04:51.051 --> 00:04:54.099 l thought something was dragging me out on the corners. 00:04:54.410 --> 00:04:56.120 Where's Serghei? Huh? 00:04:57.310 --> 00:04:59.896 Where's our car? Where's our Ford? 00:05:01.371 --> 00:05:03.611 You animal! What are you doing here? 00:05:04.650 --> 00:05:08.166 Watch it! They're handy with those hooves. She can kick you, Lyova. 00:05:08.455 --> 00:05:11.391 She covered about 20 kilometres after us. 00:05:11.499 --> 00:05:14.229 She already won't have the strength to kick us. Probably. 00:05:18.206 --> 00:05:19.932 Oh! They've brought Serghei! 00:05:22.733 --> 00:05:23.759 Serghei! 00:05:23.937 --> 00:05:26.939 Was it you who's got the ropes mixed up when tying the safety equipment? 00:05:27.155 --> 00:05:30.467 What are you talking about, Serghei? What you gave me I mixed up, indeed! 00:05:30.634 --> 00:05:32.574 Really? lt was raining so hard, I couldn't see anything tied there, at the end. 00:05:32.663 --> 00:05:35.843 You were hurrying me: 'Come on! Hurry up!' So I caught the cow rope. 00:05:35.994 --> 00:05:39.438 The new Prosecutor's arrived. He is a very strict person. 00:05:39.654 --> 00:05:43.506 - ... If not for the police, hell knows ... - What gave you I mixed up! 00:05:43.619 --> 00:05:47.051 - You tied up your own end! - Of course l did! You saw the rain! 00:05:47.157 --> 00:05:49.935 - Hello, Kuzmich. - So, Semyonov, follow me! 00:05:50.066 --> 00:05:52.798 It's all your fault. 00:05:52.971 --> 00:05:54.031 What's my fault? 00:05:54.140 --> 00:05:57.434 Stop arguing, set the table. I feel like it's time for it. 00:05:57.655 --> 00:05:58.903 OK, let's drink to Sense! 00:06:00.136 --> 00:06:01.308 In what sense? 00:06:02.736 --> 00:06:06.126 In the sense "Long Live Sense, no way to offence!" 00:06:13.167 --> 00:06:16.581 That cow has set a speed record as we can say. 00:06:16.807 --> 00:06:18.947 The general's car was going at least 50. 00:06:19.040 --> 00:06:22.106 It's a pity we can't register it with Guinness. 00:06:22.353 --> 00:06:23.585 I mean, it was documented. 00:06:23.586 --> 00:06:26.799 But we have destroyed the protocol on mutual agreement. 00:06:26.869 --> 00:06:28.847 Otherwise we would have got to the Guinness book of records. 00:06:28.978 --> 00:06:31.984 We'll draw up a new protocol for the Guinness book of records. 00:06:32.037 --> 00:06:35.553 I have one case with a suspect who has PhD in biology. 00:06:35.648 --> 00:06:37.248 He will be the witness. 00:06:37.418 --> 00:06:40.712 It's time for our region to become world-wide known, 00:06:40.918 --> 00:06:42.764 to defend the honor of the Motherland. 00:06:48.659 --> 00:06:51.663 - Prosecutor! What's up? - I've just remembered the Snivels. 00:06:52.659 --> 00:06:54.001 What snivels? 00:06:54.659 --> 00:06:58.553 My village lies between two rivers: The Big Snivel and the Little Snivel. 00:07:03.359 --> 00:07:05.993 - So... - Mikhalych, it's not quite right. 00:07:06.097 --> 00:07:10.232 Of course, l see. So, to the Motherland! 00:07:10.273 --> 00:07:11.153 I see... 00:07:19.061 --> 00:07:20.997 Two vodkas and some sturgeon. 00:07:22.301 --> 00:07:24.591 Yes, the prosecutor is not one of us! 00:07:26.662 --> 00:07:29.102 You drink too much! Such a bore! 00:07:30.702 --> 00:07:34.134 We shouldn't have taken him fishing, he'll ruin all the holiday. 00:07:34.822 --> 00:07:38.716 He says: 'At your lodge the wonders happen. All the amenities, 00:07:39.383 --> 00:07:42.773 the standards and service that never be at any fashionable resorts!' 00:07:46.383 --> 00:07:48.623 Service, my foot! What self-indulgence! 00:07:49.532 --> 00:07:52.124 ln fact, I had a nice building business. 00:07:52.299 --> 00:07:55.443 l've built a verandah in a classic oriental style, 00:07:55.614 --> 00:07:59.064 with a special place for observing and relishing the moon. 00:07:59.204 --> 00:08:04.262 Kuzmich, they were building those verandahs at the end of the Heian period, 00:08:05.904 --> 00:08:08.572 It was a new architectural style 00:08:10.103 --> 00:08:12.393 named shinden-zukuri. 00:08:13.225 --> 00:08:15.615 - What? - Shinden-zukuri. 00:08:16.995 --> 00:08:20.511 Which was based on interest in the inner corners of man. 00:08:20.565 --> 00:08:24.165 l don't know about them, but for me watching the moon is emotional. 00:08:24.986 --> 00:08:27.468 A total escape from our chaos. 00:08:28.146 --> 00:08:30.429 Listen, Kuzmich, why are you constantly 00:08:30.430 --> 00:08:32.712 getting into this oriental mysticism? 00:08:33.775 --> 00:08:38.144 Can't you peacefully meditate in our Russian way? 00:08:38.366 --> 00:08:41.429 lf you do it the Russian way, you'll ruin your health. 00:08:42.227 --> 00:08:44.111 Two rings on the bell, her name is Olya. 00:08:45.227 --> 00:08:47.467 He is a freak that in drinking is weak. 00:08:48.987 --> 00:08:51.227 What a milksop! 00:08:52.468 --> 00:08:56.362 His predecessor was a real man! He was one of us. 00:08:57.828 --> 00:09:02.296 He could drink half a bucket, overflowing, bottoms up, 00:09:02.828 --> 00:09:06.302 and then give a lecture about the dangers of alcoholism, 00:09:07.389 --> 00:09:10.905 and on the culture of sexual relationships in the countryside. 00:09:11.669 --> 00:09:13.909 Kuzmich, don't get us worked up, huh. 00:09:14.829 --> 00:09:19.395 Here! Keep your eyes on! Keep your eyes on where you are steering. So I don't get where are we going to, huh? 00:09:20.070 --> 00:09:22.110 It'll be dark soon at last. 00:09:23.150 --> 00:09:26.198 We'll navigate by the stars then. Two fingers left of Algol. 00:09:28.310 --> 00:09:30.246 What Algol? Are you OK? 00:09:31.359 --> 00:09:33.799 It's a star in the constellation of Perseus. 00:09:33.978 --> 00:09:35.862 There it is, barely noticeable one. 00:09:35.931 --> 00:09:39.237 This is the North Star, a little higher is Cassiopeia. 00:09:40.671 --> 00:09:42.961 Turn left, and there's Algol. 00:09:45.371 --> 00:09:46.369 Have you got it? 00:09:46.468 --> 00:09:47.348 I see... 00:09:49.672 --> 00:09:51.762 Kuzmich! Oh, Lord, Kuzmich! 00:09:52.972 --> 00:09:54.086 Kuzmich! 00:09:54.303 --> 00:09:55.271 He's out. 00:09:55.352 --> 00:09:57.412 He had told me before, on the pier 00:09:58.232 --> 00:10:01.146 about being nervous when waiting for us. 00:10:01.591 --> 00:10:03.601 Yeah. He was drunk! 00:10:03.722 --> 00:10:07.304 What alcohol... dammit... what Algol are we heading for? 00:10:07.482 --> 00:10:10.854 As long as we do not stray off course! 'Two fingers left...' 00:10:10.973 --> 00:10:13.991 Algol is there. There's a light over there, head that way. 00:10:16.234 --> 00:10:19.708 Where should l stick my fingers: vertically or horizontally? 00:10:19.963 --> 00:10:23.269 In any case, Kuzmich has thicker fingers. 00:10:23.445 --> 00:10:25.735 As long as we do not stray off course! 00:10:27.314 --> 00:10:28.600 That way. 00:10:29.834 --> 00:10:31.652 - Are you sure? - Yes. 00:10:33.235 --> 00:10:36.057 - Lyova, are you sure that this is his lodge? - Yes. 00:10:36.395 --> 00:10:40.415 He sent me a Christmas card. lt's his alright. 13th lodge. 00:10:41.835 --> 00:10:43.065 We are going the right way. 00:10:52.916 --> 00:10:54.480 So, unload. 00:11:09.317 --> 00:11:12.623 Jesus, why it and so much? 00:11:16.918 --> 00:11:21.232 The main thing, I called him, l said him: 'Don't bring too much, we're going to have rest.' 00:11:24.758 --> 00:11:26.538 five, six... sixteen boxes! 00:11:31.758 --> 00:11:32.756 Yeah ... 00:11:37.839 --> 00:11:39.293 There's something not quite right... 00:11:40.038 --> 00:11:43.530 The main thing I called him, l said him: 'Don't bring too much, 00:11:43.663 --> 00:11:46.047 we are just going to have rest.' Right? 00:11:46.141 --> 00:11:49.105 l said not more than sixteen, but l meant the bottles, 00:11:49.182 --> 00:11:50.722 Certainly not boxes. 00:11:50.830 --> 00:11:53.938 Do you think I could suggest something like this? 00:11:54.180 --> 00:11:57.192 Let's just hope it's not all for us. 00:11:57.329 --> 00:12:00.989 Well, the Prosecutor also came. Maybe, someone else will show up 00:12:01.085 --> 00:12:02.195 to have rest. 00:12:02.341 --> 00:12:06.007 Kuzmich, why so much vodka? How much were you asked to bring? 00:12:07.321 --> 00:12:09.851 However many you asked for - that's how many l brought. 00:12:10.842 --> 00:12:14.232 But never mind, I'm not an enemy to my health, l can relax in a civilized manner. 00:12:20.482 --> 00:12:22.100 So, to Understanding! 00:12:39.684 --> 00:12:41.464 We know how to relax. 00:12:42.844 --> 00:12:46.066 Sixteen boxes is just about right. The less we couldn't take. 00:12:48.244 --> 00:12:51.508 That must be respect. Look how he is taking care of him. He loves him, probably. 00:12:54.205 --> 00:12:57.679 Kuzmich, why is your colleague keeping silent all the time? 00:12:59.925 --> 00:13:01.155 Definitely not mine. 00:13:03.725 --> 00:13:06.158 I got it so that he's definitely deaf and dumb. 00:13:08.395 --> 00:13:09.238 Things happen, what can you do. 00:13:10.246 --> 00:13:12.286 For women it would be bad. Yeah. 00:13:13.646 --> 00:13:16.826 Because for women, You can say a tragedy. 00:13:17.856 --> 00:13:20.678 All communication is based on words. 00:13:20.786 --> 00:13:26.809 But we men, we can understand each other without words. 00:13:27.749 --> 00:13:29.739 We have a lot of things to discuss, 00:13:29.940 --> 00:13:31.545 among us men. 00:13:35.487 --> 00:13:37.423 Oh! Having a shave wouldn't hurt. 00:13:41.088 --> 00:13:43.618 Mikhalych, be careful with your hands. 00:13:44.248 --> 00:13:47.848 You scratched your neck, and he thought you wanted a drink. 00:13:52.569 --> 00:13:56.043 You see, l didn't come here for that. l came to get some rest. 00:14:01.009 --> 00:14:03.877 Do some fishing, relax. See it? 00:14:06.690 --> 00:14:09.130 We can't hurt his feelings. To the silence. 00:14:09.850 --> 00:14:12.284 So, to the strength of men's silence! 00:14:14.690 --> 00:14:15.908 He understands everything! 00:14:17.328 --> 00:14:21.631 Listen, where can l 00:14:22.491 --> 00:14:28.022 sleep and wash myself? 00:14:28.931 --> 00:14:31.067 Yes, wash myself. 00:14:32.631 --> 00:14:33.629 He got it! 00:14:41.692 --> 00:14:43.310 ls that what we need? 00:15:06.495 --> 00:15:07.395 Oh... 00:15:15.695 --> 00:15:16.893 Oops. Phew! 00:15:25.195 --> 00:15:26.867 Didn't you understand me? 00:15:27.117 --> 00:15:28.735 I told you. 00:15:29.002 --> 00:15:36.032 l came to do some fishing, understand? Big one like this! Big fish, understand? 00:15:45.577 --> 00:15:49.471 Of course, l can't give a toast like the General, l'll be brief: 00:15:50.497 --> 00:15:52.329 So, goodbye, health. 00:16:04.018 --> 00:16:05.582 Help yourself. 00:16:08.858 --> 00:16:09.972 Kuzmich! 00:16:14.658 --> 00:16:15.772 Kuzmich! 00:16:19.958 --> 00:16:21.072 Kuzmich! 00:16:23.339 --> 00:16:24.569 Where am l? 00:16:29.020 --> 00:16:29.960 Lyova! 00:16:30.920 --> 00:16:31.860 Lyova! 00:16:32.580 --> 00:16:35.928 Kuzmich! l'm over here! Which shed did we put the vodka in? 00:16:37.260 --> 00:16:39.186 - ls that you, Lyova? - ls it me? 00:16:51.701 --> 00:16:53.891 Mikhalych, just take the hair of the dog... 00:16:55.261 --> 00:16:59.071 We'll get some worms, have some breakfast, and go fishing, right? 00:17:03.422 --> 00:17:04.420 Right. 00:17:05.702 --> 00:17:08.079 Kuzmich, have you got any bread? 00:17:10.881 --> 00:17:11.881 Maybe. 00:17:13.703 --> 00:17:14.473 Where? 00:17:17.075 --> 00:17:17.775 There. 00:17:23.703 --> 00:17:24.469 Where there? 00:17:25.869 --> 00:17:27.593 Look in the kitchen. 00:17:45.705 --> 00:17:47.485 You've got zilch. 00:17:48.265 --> 00:17:51.087 We'll have to drive to the shop to get some bread. 00:17:52.505 --> 00:17:55.127 Serghei, what do you want for breakfast? 00:18:02.266 --> 00:18:08.353 Serghei, l'm taking some money? For bread? Can I? 00:18:16.187 --> 00:18:17.185 He's alive. 00:18:27.687 --> 00:18:29.359 Mikhalych, we won't be long: 00:18:30.508 --> 00:18:33.376 we'll just go for bread and back. 00:18:44.109 --> 00:18:45.827 lt's a good road. 00:18:46.828 --> 00:18:48.613 Yeah, they've learned how to build. 00:18:54.030 --> 00:18:56.370 - Want some? - No, I can't. 00:18:57.190 --> 00:18:59.326 - Why so? - I'm driving. 00:19:13.191 --> 00:19:14.363 Clap (my back)! [Kuzmich claps his hands] 00:19:20.712 --> 00:19:21.826 Thanks. 00:19:39.193 --> 00:19:43.690 Weird. There's neither bread nor drinks anywhere. 00:19:44.793 --> 00:19:47.131 It's an auto shop. 00:19:47.954 --> 00:19:51.090 - You can't drink and drive. - Can't eat no bread, either? 00:20:02.435 --> 00:20:05.395 Miss, do you like fishing? Pardon. 00:20:07.275 --> 00:20:11.379 Lyova, you had better have a drink of water first before dating with the lady. Let's go. 00:20:14.775 --> 00:20:15.715 Stop! 00:20:15.875 --> 00:20:19.559 Girls! Let's go fishing, huh? It's a nice weather outside. 00:20:21.876 --> 00:20:24.510 We'll sit down, do some fishing, have some talking. 00:20:25.276 --> 00:20:29.044 - We just go and dig up some worms. - And buy some wellies. 00:20:30.026 --> 00:20:32.014 Lyova, you'd better shut up. 00:20:32.096 --> 00:20:35.056 You're scaring even me with your roaring hiccups. 00:21:17.040 --> 00:21:20.132 - Hey, where's the toilet? - I can't drink no more... 00:21:46.882 --> 00:21:49.268 Do you mind I turned my back on you? 00:21:56.363 --> 00:21:58.299 Good night, or day? 00:22:36.805 --> 00:22:39.427 Do you believe in love at first sight? 00:22:42.126 --> 00:22:43.958 Well, neither do I. 00:22:46.806 --> 00:22:51.704 First one must try and understand his feelings, 00:22:53.887 --> 00:22:58.765 only after that a decision must be made. 00:23:06.287 --> 00:23:08.969 Wait a little. I'll get champain. 00:23:11.128 --> 00:23:12.892 I'll be back in a second. 00:23:34.129 --> 00:23:37.089 Have we got any champagne? l need champagne urgently. 00:23:39.450 --> 00:23:42.410 We've got vodka. Kuzmich doesn't keep champagne. 00:23:55.211 --> 00:23:57.645 Who drinks champagne on a fishing trip? 00:23:59.531 --> 00:24:02.879 - Do you have any champagne? - Excuse me, where's the toilet? 00:24:04.451 --> 00:24:07.883 Everywhere. You just don't go near the shed, there are loads of nettles. 00:24:10.091 --> 00:24:11.205 Thanks. 00:24:12.532 --> 00:24:15.166 - Do you have any champagne? - Only vodka. 00:24:50.535 --> 00:24:52.471 Why's everything so clumsy? 00:25:14.572 --> 00:25:15.372 Oh! 00:25:18.617 --> 00:25:20.127 Sorry, Serghei. 00:25:26.737 --> 00:25:31.916 Where's to go now? Lyova, do you remember which way we came? 00:25:32.618 --> 00:25:36.092 You're the bloody native, this is your neck of the woods, not mine. 00:25:37.978 --> 00:25:40.754 Oh, I can see cops. Let's ask them. 00:25:47.739 --> 00:25:51.381 - Hey, listen, how can we get to his place? - Hello! 00:25:54.139 --> 00:25:56.629 To the 13th lodge. I'm Kuzmich. 00:25:58.299 --> 00:26:00.778 You're not buckled up. 00:26:00.779 --> 00:26:02.823 What, are you Karelian? The new one? 00:26:03.900 --> 00:26:06.768 Oh, look, Kuzmich, they've got new uniforms. 00:26:07.060 --> 00:26:08.892 You're drunk. You're swaying. 00:26:09.620 --> 00:26:12.926 - First to the right, and then to the left. Did you get that, Kuzmich? - No, I didn't. 00:26:13.140 --> 00:26:16.446 Thanks, mate, but you should learn some Russian. It'll be usefull to you. 00:26:18.061 --> 00:26:19.515 Hey, Masti, what's happened? 00:26:20.741 --> 00:26:24.719 These Russian are totally flippy, driving around blind drunk, as if they were back home. 00:26:37.142 --> 00:26:40.146 l noticed that something wasn't right yesterday. 00:26:40.222 --> 00:26:42.904 Everything is clean and neat - not our way. 00:26:44.383 --> 00:26:45.781 ...and nostalgia. 00:26:47.063 --> 00:26:49.697 Finland? Sweden? What do you think? 00:26:49.903 --> 00:26:52.951 l think we should get out of here before they get us. 00:26:53.063 --> 00:26:55.401 There's only one problem - the General. 00:26:57.224 --> 00:27:00.530 Yes, the General is a problem. He might make a point of it. 00:27:10.545 --> 00:27:13.809 Listen, Kuzmich, we stopped here, didn't we? 00:27:15.145 --> 00:27:18.149 - Yeah. Here! Mikhalych is splashing about over there! - Yeah. 00:27:26.145 --> 00:27:27.259 They are asleep. 00:27:27.906 --> 00:27:30.636 Prosecutor, get up! Prosecutor, reveille! 00:27:32.746 --> 00:27:34.310 Serghei, get up. 00:27:35.476 --> 00:27:38.908 We've crossed the border, we've got to leg it, fast and quiet. 00:27:39.036 --> 00:27:41.592 - Lyova... - Get up, I tell you! 00:27:41.757 --> 00:27:43.987 Let's get at least one of them up. 00:27:44.137 --> 00:27:47.383 Serghei, we're over the border, we crossed it! 00:27:47.587 --> 00:27:51.421 Olegych, they can put us behind bars, then we'll be fishing not so soon. 00:27:51.517 --> 00:27:53.055 Serghei! Sery! 00:27:53.207 --> 00:27:54.957 When are we leaving? By night? 00:27:55.548 --> 00:27:57.838 At night it might be too late. 00:27:59.507 --> 00:28:01.547 Lord, how did I get into that. 00:28:01.799 --> 00:28:03.889 Who dressed me like this, huh? 00:28:05.416 --> 00:28:08.806 lt's all your colleague's fault. Your colleague's bastard! 00:28:11.549 --> 00:28:14.641 He spiked my drink with a sleeping pill - l still keep snoozing off. 00:28:15.588 --> 00:28:17.406 - lt's all because of you! - Me? 00:28:17.762 --> 00:28:19.794 - You, you, you! - What's because of me? 00:28:19.848 --> 00:28:23.028 - 'We'll navigate by Algol, two fingers left', huh! - We should make a run for it, got it? 00:28:23.256 --> 00:28:26.604 Olegych, what were you saying about sleeping pills? 00:28:29.550 --> 00:28:33.402 Mikhalych, you mustn't stay in the water so long. You'll get sick. 00:28:34.310 --> 00:28:36.500 All illnesses are from lack of culture. 00:28:38.151 --> 00:28:40.681 Water is the cradle of conscious life. 00:28:42.631 --> 00:28:44.956 lt just gives me pleasure to return to the source of existence. 00:28:44.957 --> 00:28:47.281 and benefit from this untold pleasure. 00:28:48.231 --> 00:28:52.251 lf he stays in his cradle much longer, 00:28:52.632 --> 00:28:55.162 we'll spend the rest of our lives behind bars. 00:28:55.891 --> 00:28:58.131 They have comfortable prisons. 00:28:58.215 --> 00:29:01.995 You get bananas for lunch there, you can do sports and read books. 00:29:02.132 --> 00:29:05.660 Thanks, l can do the same thing at home. 00:29:06.753 --> 00:29:08.637 l want to return to the Motherland. 00:29:10.633 --> 00:29:13.897 Don't break my heart. Start smiling - Mikhalych is here. 00:29:26.754 --> 00:29:28.994 Lovely! The water is wonderful. 00:29:29.613 --> 00:29:33.507 Mikhalych, we've got fed up with this place. Maybe, we'll go to the old lodge? 00:29:33.622 --> 00:29:36.758 - We used to it. - lt's not bad here either. 00:29:38.075 --> 00:29:41.927 At first l felt depressed, but now it abated. 00:29:44.395 --> 00:29:47.953 We must just keep ourselves occupied, we'll go fishing now. 00:29:49.396 --> 00:29:50.568 The pills. 00:29:58.396 --> 00:30:03.982 There're no fish here. They've gone to the silent places. To the old lodge. 00:30:05.157 --> 00:30:07.733 Mikhalych, would you like some more tea? 00:30:10.397 --> 00:30:13.401 - How many pills did you put in? - Two. 00:30:15.757 --> 00:30:16.943 Not enough. He's like a bull. 00:30:20.460 --> 00:30:22.803 Put some more in that he just fall down. 00:30:22.918 --> 00:30:26.434 Kuzmich, where is your verandah for observing the moon? 00:30:28.078 --> 00:30:31.342 - I was searching for it all the morning and l couldn't find it. - There. l'll show you later. 00:30:33.399 --> 00:30:36.033 There are no fish here, almost none. 00:30:40.159 --> 00:30:43.591 - Coincidence, he was lucky. - There's fish here. We have to know how to catch it. 00:30:46.000 --> 00:30:49.222 Would you like some more tea? lt's so hot here. 00:31:03.001 --> 00:31:04.115 Thanks. 00:31:07.081 --> 00:31:09.995 - lt's not working. - lt will soon. 00:31:10.241 --> 00:31:12.779 He's had three cups. Seven pills. 00:31:15.762 --> 00:31:17.646 Maybe they're not the right pills? 00:31:26.562 --> 00:31:27.382 They're the right pills. 00:31:32.163 --> 00:31:35.805 - What's wrong with Serghei? - Too long in the sun. He's asleep. 00:31:37.323 --> 00:31:39.945 Well, it's time to do something else for a change. 00:31:47.164 --> 00:31:48.944 lt's not working. 00:31:50.123 --> 00:31:54.101 Maybe they make them immune to these things in the army. We don't know what. 00:31:54.264 --> 00:31:56.504 Maybe, hypnose against intoxication or something? 00:32:10.245 --> 00:32:12.181 Lyova, what if he falls asleep? 00:32:14.566 --> 00:32:16.398 Well, that's what we are waiting for. 00:32:19.326 --> 00:32:24.256 Yes, but if he falls asleep on that thing? 00:32:30.007 --> 00:32:31.571 Right, he's already asleep! 00:32:36.107 --> 00:32:39.539 - l'll catch lasso him. - Careful. 00:32:40.267 --> 00:32:41.265 Come on! 00:32:42.328 --> 00:32:43.926 Got him! 00:32:44.807 --> 00:32:46.533 Kuzmich, where are you going? 00:32:46.766 --> 00:32:48.220 Mikhalych, stop the boat! 00:32:48.325 --> 00:32:51.055 - Wait, Mikhalych! - Kuzmich, where are you going? 00:32:51.218 --> 00:32:53.508 - Mikhalych, stop! - Kuzmich! 00:32:53.769 --> 00:32:56.637 Mikhalych! Wake up! Mikhalych, dear! 00:32:58.609 --> 00:33:00.849 You are dragging me after you! 00:33:01.129 --> 00:33:02.583 Mikhalych, stop! 00:33:05.088 --> 00:33:06.374 Stop! 00:33:06.535 --> 00:33:09.403 Don't worry, Kuzmich. In my account 00:33:09.596 --> 00:33:12.732 he'll run out of fuel in 2 hours. So hold on! 00:33:13.821 --> 00:33:18.122 Mikhalych, stop! Stop! 00:33:19.730 --> 00:33:22.268 l can't swim! Mikhalych! 00:33:24.091 --> 00:33:25.709 Hold on, Kuzmich! 00:33:36.632 --> 00:33:39.018 lt's over, Kuzmich, he's out of fuel. 00:33:41.012 --> 00:33:43.972 Save me, the General knows how to swim. 00:33:45.772 --> 00:33:48.158 He's got an unsinkable bike! 00:33:54.333 --> 00:33:55.897 Kuzmich, give me a hand. 00:34:02.653 --> 00:34:04.107 Full speed ahead! 00:34:08.574 --> 00:34:11.534 So, goodbye. Sorry for any inconvenience. 00:34:14.174 --> 00:34:16.414 Next time you're down our way, drop in. 00:34:18.654 --> 00:34:22.043 Kuzmich, what do you think, are we already in neutral waters? 00:34:25.094 --> 00:34:27.824 How should l know: everything is so near here. 00:34:28.103 --> 00:34:31.547 Lenin made it to Finland on foot in a few minutes. 00:34:31.755 --> 00:34:33.713 And my boat is going faster. 00:34:33.936 --> 00:34:36.322 Well, do you know where you are going? 00:34:37.335 --> 00:34:39.911 Because Lenin knew where he was going. 00:34:40.226 --> 00:34:43.922 Of course, it's harder to navigate by the sun than by the stars. 00:34:44.074 --> 00:34:47.033 Once you led us the wrong way by your stars. 00:34:47.136 --> 00:34:50.466 Let's hope we don't end up in Africa with your sun. 00:34:51.577 --> 00:34:53.460 So, have we broken through? 00:34:55.337 --> 00:34:56.581 Is it much further? 00:34:58.283 --> 00:34:59.583 Where is the vodka? 00:35:05.937 --> 00:35:08.805 You're like the last donkeys. You left the vodka behind. 00:35:09.558 --> 00:35:12.518 You have not forgotten anything? But vodka you have left. 00:35:12.858 --> 00:35:15.148 Serghei, tell me please, 00:35:16.098 --> 00:35:19.362 did we travel a hundred miles just in order to drink vodka? 00:35:20.579 --> 00:35:21.977 Of course not. 00:35:22.579 --> 00:35:25.927 - So why did we come here? - To fish. 00:35:26.698 --> 00:35:29.428 So fish! And don't even mention vodka! 00:35:30.687 --> 00:35:31.973 ... 14, 15. 00:35:40.780 --> 00:35:42.506 Fifteen boxes! 00:35:45.941 --> 00:35:49.919 Those Russians are smugglers! Are you a smuggler as well? 00:35:51.941 --> 00:35:54.809 No, I'm an owner of a small hotel. 00:35:57.061 --> 00:35:58.679 We have a little vodka. 00:35:58.942 --> 00:36:02.122 The season is about to start, there'll be loads of tourists. 00:36:03.022 --> 00:36:06.286 The Russians are a generous people, they left this vodka for us. 00:36:10.522 --> 00:36:14.122 You don't know the Russians! I remember them though I was a little girl. 00:36:14.175 --> 00:36:16.415 They never leave vodka behind. 00:36:16.493 --> 00:36:19.361 It won't take the spoon-bait at this speed. 00:36:19.502 --> 00:36:23.606 It hurts me to think we left so much vodka behind. 00:36:23.695 --> 00:36:24.635 What the!.. 00:36:24.715 --> 00:36:27.807 And your fishing line is too thick for our waters. 00:36:29.914 --> 00:36:30.970 Olegych! 00:36:35.958 --> 00:36:38.042 - Olegych!!! - Serghei!!! 00:36:56.426 --> 00:36:57.598 Help! 00:36:59.866 --> 00:37:01.906 Help! Somebody! 00:37:17.587 --> 00:37:20.809 Darling! Hello, darling! Everything is fine! 00:37:21.588 --> 00:37:23.974 Not everything, of course. 00:37:24.187 --> 00:37:26.554 That's why tell the emergency services 00:37:26.555 --> 00:37:28.921 that l'm floating on a log in the neutral waters. 00:37:29.428 --> 00:37:31.862 Probably somewhere close to Finland. 00:37:32.268 --> 00:37:36.419 Why can't you? You're having a rest? In Cyprus? 00:37:37.108 --> 00:37:39.298 I'm on a log, and you're in Cyprus? 00:37:47.868 --> 00:37:51.228 There he is, on a log! Serghei, don't worry! 00:37:51.440 --> 00:37:53.090 Guys! I'm here! 00:37:53.267 --> 00:37:57.227 - Lyova, be careful coming up to him. - Lyova, look at the perch I caught! 00:37:57.351 --> 00:37:59.101 Olegych, don't worry! 00:37:59.755 --> 00:38:01.787 - Guys! - Let's take him! Oops! 00:38:06.590 --> 00:38:08.680 Serghei, are you OK? 00:38:10.549 --> 00:38:12.313 - My darling... - What? 00:38:12.488 --> 00:38:15.536 - My wife is in Cyprus. - It's his nerves. The stress. 00:38:15.626 --> 00:38:16.625 Left for Cyprus. 00:38:16.626 --> 00:38:19.490 Serghei! Olegych! Everything is OK. Everything will be gone. 00:38:19.684 --> 00:38:21.188 She left to have a rest. 00:38:21.258 --> 00:38:24.588 Don't worry about the vodka - we'll have loads of vodka. 00:38:24.742 --> 00:38:26.670 She's gone to Cyprus without me. 00:38:26.790 --> 00:38:29.444 So don't take it to your heart - she left. 00:38:29.613 --> 00:38:33.039 My wife went to the theater 8 years ago to see Parsifal, 00:38:33.214 --> 00:38:36.358 and then she sent me a postcard from Kathmandu: 'Don't look for me. 00:38:36.513 --> 00:38:39.271 I found my happiness and true vocation'. 00:38:39.363 --> 00:38:41.373 Cyprus isn't the end of the world - she'll be back! 00:38:44.273 --> 00:38:46.463 Hands up! Come alongside! 00:38:49.793 --> 00:38:51.357 Stop the engine! 00:38:52.124 --> 00:38:55.172 You have crossed the Russian State border! 00:38:55.313 --> 00:38:58.197 Don't shoot - we have a General and a Prosecutor with us! 00:38:58.358 --> 00:39:01.434 - Everybody stay at your place! - We got lost! 00:39:01.553 --> 00:39:03.599 We're the natives! The natives! I'm Kuzmich! 00:39:03.749 --> 00:39:07.325 Lyova, shine the light on my face! Everybody knows me here! 00:39:07.469 --> 00:39:10.425 How can I shine? I've got my hands up! 00:39:10.529 --> 00:39:12.159 Legs apart! 00:39:12.273 --> 00:39:14.273 Let's do our morning gymnastics! 00:39:14.340 --> 00:39:16.400 - Semyonov! Dear! - Cop! 00:39:18.270 --> 00:39:22.230 Kuzmich, I can't believe that you can get lost in your own backyard. 00:39:22.472 --> 00:39:23.494 Things happen ... 00:39:23.560 --> 00:39:26.500 I was looking for you. Came to have a rest. But you're out. 00:39:26.648 --> 00:39:29.424 I even started to get worried. 00:39:29.596 --> 00:39:31.828 So I took some border guards with me. 00:39:31.966 --> 00:39:35.176 - Kuzmich, we've broken through! - Everything's OK. We were roaming around the skerries. 00:39:35.377 --> 00:39:36.737 Put your hands down then. 00:39:36.797 --> 00:39:39.183 I was showing them our beautiful landscapes. 00:39:40.677 --> 00:39:44.655 The General and the Prosecutor were so impressed by the views that they fell asleep. 00:39:48.717 --> 00:39:50.589 Thank you! Good luck! 00:39:51.518 --> 00:39:55.496 If you need any help - get in touch! See you! Have a nice fishing trip! 00:39:59.338 --> 00:40:01.972 - Stop the engine! - Engine stopped! 00:40:02.159 --> 00:40:03.557 Give me the rope! 00:40:12.819 --> 00:40:15.793 They have a nice sleep. They must have had a nice time. 00:40:16.028 --> 00:40:18.138 Our landscapes are unique. 00:40:18.360 --> 00:40:22.380 I can't understand people that go to Cyprus or elsewhere to rest. But our places... 00:40:25.000 --> 00:40:29.352 What's wrong? I understand, I feel it too. 00:40:29.353 --> 00:40:30.391 Come on. 00:40:50.802 --> 00:40:54.654 - We should wake up the General. We need a toast. - We shouldn't wake up the General. 00:40:54.802 --> 00:40:58.091 - Why? What's he sitting here for then? - The vodka is gone. 00:41:00.292 --> 00:41:01.192 It sank. 00:41:04.883 --> 00:41:07.751 - All of it? - All of it. There won't be any toasts today. 00:41:09.723 --> 00:41:11.265 - Where? - There. 00:41:11.871 --> 00:41:15.789 We must call the scuba divers. ln the spring they dropped a box of cognac. 00:41:16.035 --> 00:41:19.137 When they celebrated the НТ's day of birth. 00:41:19.244 --> 00:41:22.574 They found it in all the mud near the military pier, and they got it back up. 00:41:23.394 --> 00:41:25.654 - Is it deep there? - It's deep there. 00:41:25.735 --> 00:41:27.541 - They'll find it. - It's very deep there. 00:41:27.707 --> 00:41:29.223 They'll find it all the same. 00:41:29.275 --> 00:41:32.257 Especially when they learn there is vodka down there and how much of it - they'll find it. 00:41:32.505 --> 00:41:34.625 So, what, are we going to cry about it? 00:41:49.005 --> 00:41:49.765 Oh! 00:41:52.206 --> 00:41:55.764 Of course, I can't give the toast like the General. 00:41:58.807 --> 00:42:00.261 So, I'll be brief. 00:42:02.507 --> 00:42:03.327 Well, 00:42:06.706 --> 00:42:08.796 So, you know what l mean, guys. 00:42:10.808 --> 00:42:12.372 So, to unity! 00:42:17.038 --> 00:42:20.386 Of course, to unity with nature. To our unity. 00:42:20.439 --> 00:42:23.323 She doesn't like fishing, so she stayed at home. 00:42:23.460 --> 00:42:25.882 I have bought her such a great rod. 00:42:25.943 --> 00:42:28.287 ...3 hours, and not a single bait... 00:42:28.454 --> 00:42:31.850 I caught this massive salmon over yonder, 00:42:31.911 --> 00:42:34.147 A great one, six pounds. 00:42:34.288 --> 00:42:37.082 Listen, it fetched three two-liter jars of caviar. 00:42:37.183 --> 00:42:39.556 No big deal! I was using a worm, a normal worm, 00:42:39.557 --> 00:42:41.719 I pull it to the boat and the rod started to bend, 00:42:41.838 --> 00:42:43.966 and l thought, that's it, the rod is going to break. 00:42:44.177 --> 00:42:48.023 I turned my torch on, and I saw, really saw a fish big as a log. 00:42:49.810 --> 00:42:53.158 And I've got just a paddle. So I took a paddle and gave it a bang. 00:42:54.971 --> 00:42:58.865 And the funniest thing is it was moving all the same, and I didn't even have a hand-net. 00:43:01.171 --> 00:43:03.853 What can I do? So, with my bare hands, 00:43:03.908 --> 00:43:07.382 with my bare hands I grabbed its tail. 00:43:08.212 --> 00:43:09.938 And it started thrashing around. 00:43:10.812 --> 00:43:12.952 3 hours, and not a single bait, 00:43:13.485 --> 00:43:17.273 And then, in 10 minutes I had a such biting! 00:43:17.906 --> 00:43:21.347 I had a full boat of first-rate red-fins. 00:43:21.973 --> 00:43:25.153 I call her and it turns she's left for Cyrpus without me. 00:43:34.293 --> 00:43:35.857 My darling... Cyprus... 00:43:37.214 --> 00:43:39.304 What have you found there, in your Cyprus? My darling... 00:43:43.294 --> 00:43:44.524 Who's there? 00:43:50.735 --> 00:43:52.165 Who's there? Huh? 00:44:47.935 --> 00:44:51.283 Kuzmich, it seems to me we were in a different place. 00:44:51.356 --> 00:44:53.082 We were. Now we're here. 00:44:56.459 --> 00:44:58.023 I don't remember a thing. 00:45:01.619 --> 00:45:03.503 There won't be a moon tonight. 00:45:06.380 --> 00:45:10.274 If you watch the moon for a long time, you go insane. 00:45:12.010 --> 00:45:15.694 That's what they said in Middle Asia, when I was in the army there. 00:45:15.840 --> 00:45:17.566 That's kind of sign. 00:45:19.461 --> 00:45:21.025 I don't remember a thing. 00:45:30.622 --> 00:45:33.304 I don't understand a thing. There was a shed. 00:45:43.902 --> 00:45:49.597 Kuzmich, yesterday you had a shed. There were bushes growing near it. Where is it? 00:45:50.173 --> 00:45:53.235 What for do you need it? I have a lot of buildings. 00:45:53.383 --> 00:45:56.053 - There definitely was a shed. - Nice weather. 00:45:56.183 --> 00:45:58.393 - Maybe I dreamt it. - Agreeable weather. 00:46:00.333 --> 00:46:02.859 - Didn't I drink a lot yesterday? - You did. 00:46:02.914 --> 00:46:04.744 Blacker than a king's hat. 00:46:04.886 --> 00:46:07.410 It happens. Sometimes I'm sure 00:46:07.578 --> 00:46:10.614 I've got a 100 ruble note in my tunic's pocket. 00:46:10.679 --> 00:46:12.959 But I can't find it. Oh! It appeared again! 00:46:13.030 --> 00:46:15.584 Well, stop talking about mysticism. It's time to go fishing. 00:46:15.822 --> 00:46:17.308 May I go with you? 00:46:17.411 --> 00:46:21.071 I've never really been fishing with professionals. 00:46:21.185 --> 00:46:23.763 You can come. You just dig up some worms. 00:46:23.823 --> 00:46:26.641 You must start from elementary things: 00:46:26.719 --> 00:46:30.697 First you angle with worms, then - with spoon-bait, and then - 00:46:33.826 --> 00:46:35.658 the other forms of fishing. 00:46:35.946 --> 00:46:38.350 Dynamite, for example. Electrofishing. 00:46:38.436 --> 00:46:41.610 We don't use it, though. We only fish sportingly. 00:46:41.735 --> 00:46:43.825 Yes, only sportingly. 00:46:43.927 --> 00:46:47.768 Kuzmich, maybe you've got some mermaids here or somebody else. 00:46:47.769 --> 00:46:48.571 Naiads, for example. 00:46:48.627 --> 00:46:53.939 I've got loads of things that go beyond ordinary sense. 00:46:54.547 --> 00:46:59.226 There are lot of women wandering about. This place is great. 00:47:06.228 --> 00:47:12.189 - Kuzmich! Should I dig up worms here? - Dig, alright! There're plenty here. 00:47:18.829 --> 00:47:21.119 Prosecutor, just dig deeper. 00:47:26.150 --> 00:47:30.086 - Kuzmich! There are no worms here! - Dig, alright! There're plenty here. 00:47:32.370 --> 00:47:35.388 Kuzmich, what's the Prosecutor doing in the field there? 00:47:35.489 --> 00:47:37.719 Well, my hands are not getting through. 00:47:37.882 --> 00:47:41.032 Last year I wanted to plant Soya-beans here. 00:47:43.471 --> 00:47:44.757 Or was it Gaolyang... 00:47:46.911 --> 00:47:48.421 Kuzmich! l've found one! 00:47:50.831 --> 00:47:54.263 Lyova, go there! Go there! There're plenty of fish there. Come on! Come on! 00:47:56.232 --> 00:48:00.210 Go straight ahead, Mikhalych. They catch no fish there. I haven't thrown any bait out there. 00:48:05.832 --> 00:48:08.514 - What should l fish with? - There's a sinker there. 00:48:16.313 --> 00:48:18.077 - This one? - That's right. 00:48:19.833 --> 00:48:21.717 And how do you use it? 00:48:22.394 --> 00:48:25.742 You put the worm on the hook, then you cast it and wait. 00:48:26.203 --> 00:48:28.779 If it starts jerking, you pull it out. 00:48:28.919 --> 00:48:30.033 Got it? 00:48:30.634 --> 00:48:33.210 Hook on the worm, and then overboard. OK. 00:48:34.994 --> 00:48:37.724 Hook on the worm... Where's my worm? 00:48:40.915 --> 00:48:42.587 What've you got there? 00:48:44.235 --> 00:48:45.035 Is that all? 00:48:45.036 --> 00:48:47.835 I dug up half a field. I've found only it. 00:48:49.115 --> 00:48:50.895 Okay, let's help. 00:48:52.236 --> 00:48:54.068 Give it a swing. That's it. 00:48:56.515 --> 00:48:59.101 - You cast it. Here, take it. - Thank you. 00:48:59.216 --> 00:49:01.088 - Jesus... - Yeah. 00:49:02.737 --> 00:49:04.463 Pull it out and try once again. 00:49:05.779 --> 00:49:08.509 Lyova, it can't move, it's got stuck on something. 00:49:09.305 --> 00:49:12.173 Pull harder, it's a strong line. It will hold on. 00:49:12.354 --> 00:49:13.294 Oh ... 00:49:18.484 --> 00:49:20.048 Lyova, who is this? 00:49:20.192 --> 00:49:22.128 I mean, what's its name? 00:49:25.558 --> 00:49:27.798 - It's a bream. - Is it a big one? 00:49:28.318 --> 00:49:29.548 It's not small. 00:49:30.757 --> 00:49:32.847 A big bream! A great bream! 00:49:34.758 --> 00:49:36.798 We'll catch an even bigger one! 00:49:37.010 --> 00:49:39.050 Should l put another worm on? 00:49:39.144 --> 00:49:41.826 Yes, put the hook on the worm, and the sinker into the water. 00:49:43.239 --> 00:49:46.107 We're going to catch a massive fish now! 00:49:46.479 --> 00:49:48.205 Somebody's lucky... 00:49:49.579 --> 00:49:50.399 Oh! 00:50:08.829 --> 00:50:09.943 Jesus! 00:50:10.841 --> 00:50:13.031 What are you looking at? Cut it! 00:50:19.562 --> 00:50:20.960 Get the first aid kit. 00:50:24.162 --> 00:50:25.942 How did you manage it? 00:50:27.002 --> 00:50:30.644 This is my first time fishing. My first trip on a boat too. 00:50:31.403 --> 00:50:33.443 Well, you won't forget it in a hurry. 00:50:33.563 --> 00:50:37.079 - We've got nothing, not even vodka. - We should get him to a hospital. 00:50:42.263 --> 00:50:43.605 Well, Semyonov! 00:50:45.764 --> 00:50:49.490 Prosecutor, you should put your finger into the water, to stop the worm from dying. 00:50:49.564 --> 00:50:52.232 Otherwise the ptomain will get into the wood. 00:50:53.844 --> 00:50:55.728 Do something! 00:51:02.644 --> 00:51:03.642 Come on. 00:51:04.005 --> 00:51:05.785 Watch you step. 00:51:06.764 --> 00:51:08.274 Hey! Somebody! 00:51:09.869 --> 00:51:11.267 We need some help. 00:51:13.914 --> 00:51:16.500 - Bon appetite. - Hello. 00:51:16.705 --> 00:51:18.431 Thank you. What's wrong? 00:51:19.846 --> 00:51:22.714 - When did you get it stuck? - Today, out fishing. 00:51:24.646 --> 00:51:25.818 Show me. 00:51:35.247 --> 00:51:39.057 We put it into water, so that it wouldn't die. 00:51:41.167 --> 00:51:42.509 Do you understand? 00:51:46.328 --> 00:51:47.614 Here you are. 00:51:48.848 --> 00:51:50.078 An anesthetic. 00:51:52.248 --> 00:51:53.068 Well! 00:52:00.009 --> 00:52:01.627 Give me the instrument. 00:52:02.209 --> 00:52:03.381 Get it out. 00:52:03.847 --> 00:52:05.665 Well, well, well. This one? 00:52:12.650 --> 00:52:15.742 Yes. It's gone right through. But the end sticks out. 00:52:16.850 --> 00:52:18.360 It's a piece of luck for you. 00:52:20.010 --> 00:52:22.878 We won't touch the worm. We'll just cut it away. 00:52:24.850 --> 00:52:27.284 Never mind, all my stuff is sterilized. 00:52:31.550 --> 00:52:32.722 Easy. 00:52:34.491 --> 00:52:35.721 That's it. 00:52:40.252 --> 00:52:41.816 You can have this as a keepsake. 00:52:44.291 --> 00:52:46.271 - Thank you. - Thank you! 00:52:46.872 --> 00:52:48.652 Thank yous don't pour. 00:52:48.776 --> 00:52:49.774 Got it! 00:52:52.373 --> 00:52:55.763 It's no big deal, my sister's husband got hooked right here. 00:52:56.812 --> 00:52:58.952 The main thing, he picked himself. 00:52:59.023 --> 00:53:02.041 We thought he would never be a man again. 00:53:02.253 --> 00:53:05.991 But he is lucky: he's still got his wife and his mistress. 00:53:06.712 --> 00:53:10.114 Put your finger in some vodka. You have to disinfect it. 00:53:10.350 --> 00:53:12.942 The worm might have been ill. 00:53:13.934 --> 00:53:15.498 So, to the operation! 00:53:25.495 --> 00:53:27.275 What, I have to drink this? 00:53:28.655 --> 00:53:30.945 Well, if you're not squeamish. 00:53:31.794 --> 00:53:34.294 Personally, I am very sensitive to this. 00:53:34.487 --> 00:53:38.603 When you brought that worm on the finger, I nearly went sick. 00:53:38.752 --> 00:53:43.066 Meat dumplings are a traditional Russian meal though they came to us from Siberia 00:53:44.791 --> 00:53:48.223 and in translation they mean "boiled ear". 00:53:48.451 --> 00:53:51.757 If we'd caught some fish, we wouldn't be doing this. 00:53:52.110 --> 00:53:53.994 Meat dumplings are the essence of life. 00:53:54.548 --> 00:53:58.232 This food is rather simple, but it is very healthy for man. 00:53:59.027 --> 00:54:03.005 The main thing is the proportion, especially of dough. 00:54:03.547 --> 00:54:06.639 You can eat up these meat dumplings to a hundred 00:54:07.904 --> 00:54:10.864 without any consequences for your health. 00:54:12.181 --> 00:54:13.691 Wow! How are you? 00:54:13.840 --> 00:54:17.368 I caught this big fish. Lyova, what is it called? 00:54:17.531 --> 00:54:20.153 - A skimmer. - This big skimmer. 00:54:20.234 --> 00:54:21.316 There's no fish. 00:54:21.502 --> 00:54:23.522 The weather is changing, so they're not biting. 00:54:23.680 --> 00:54:27.766 We can catch them only in a vandal way with the help of dynamite or the fishing net. 00:54:28.700 --> 00:54:30.318 So, what are we celebrating? 00:54:31.939 --> 00:54:33.337 So, to the finger! 00:54:35.177 --> 00:54:38.399 That's right. I'd even like to tell you more - that's true. 00:54:38.905 --> 00:54:41.145 When are we going fishing again? 00:54:41.236 --> 00:54:44.284 Later. First we have to make our minimum requirement of dumplings. 00:54:47.254 --> 00:54:50.446 Well, now with these dumplings it would be a long procedure, you know. 00:54:50.652 --> 00:54:51.442 Hey! 00:54:53.773 --> 00:54:55.657 Is anybody there? 00:54:59.451 --> 00:55:00.565 Egad! 00:55:01.471 --> 00:55:04.735 What a silly idea can come to my head! 00:55:05.309 --> 00:55:06.981 Ugh, Lord. 00:55:18.433 --> 00:55:19.253 Hey! 00:55:20.665 --> 00:55:22.391 Excuse me, are you there? 00:55:26.764 --> 00:55:29.340 Excuse me, I wanted to talk to you. 00:55:32.163 --> 00:55:33.889 Don't be afraid of me. 00:55:36.041 --> 00:55:37.327 Excuse me ... 00:55:42.360 --> 00:55:44.794 Hello, my name is Serghei. 00:55:45.028 --> 00:55:46.754 Don't be afraid of me. 00:55:46.900 --> 00:55:50.962 Does your tail get in the way? I mean, when you're on dry land. 00:55:57.156 --> 00:55:58.270 Where are you going? 00:55:59.274 --> 00:56:00.094 Hey! 00:56:13.752 --> 00:56:15.942 Olegych, what are you doing here? 00:56:27.630 --> 00:56:29.670 Excuse me, but again I am. 00:56:30.328 --> 00:56:34.222 I don't want to seem impolite, but you stunned me. 00:56:38.026 --> 00:56:39.312 Excuse me ... 00:56:40.285 --> 00:56:42.484 I never even imagined 00:56:42.485 --> 00:56:44.683 that creatures like you exist. 00:56:46.983 --> 00:56:49.569 Mikhalych, the transformer has broken down. 00:56:53.561 --> 00:56:55.287 What is there ... 00:56:55.581 --> 00:56:58.511 - A Naiad, eyes are grey... - What's wrong with you? 00:56:58.649 --> 00:57:01.105 I'm with the purest intentions ... 00:57:01.180 --> 00:57:03.884 No big deal, I've got a very low voltage here. 00:57:04.008 --> 00:57:06.354 ... and hit me so. It's no good. 00:57:06.508 --> 00:57:09.272 - I should move the box to another place. - So beautiful. 00:57:09.456 --> 00:57:12.564 People confuse it with a toilet or a beach cabin. 00:57:12.676 --> 00:57:15.514 Very politely, with a bunch of flowers. 00:57:15.634 --> 00:57:18.074 From a purely professional interest. 00:57:19.335 --> 00:57:22.767 A season doesn't go by without somebody zapping themselves. 00:57:23.334 --> 00:57:27.270 My intentions were honorable. What was the idea to strike me! 00:57:28.492 --> 00:57:30.364 It's no good. It's no good. 00:57:32.731 --> 00:57:36.331 Shame on you, Serghei. You distress me, really. Well, tell me what the hell... 00:57:37.070 --> 00:57:39.522 did you go into the transformer cabin? 00:57:39.688 --> 00:57:41.594 There is clearly written ... [Don't go there or it will fucking kill you!] 00:57:46.328 --> 00:57:50.180 Kuzmich, what should an intelligent person think, having read this? 00:57:51.456 --> 00:57:53.724 By the way, intelligent people 00:57:53.725 --> 00:57:55.992 don't go into transformer cabins with flowers. 00:57:56.184 --> 00:57:57.268 Mikhalych. 00:57:57.525 --> 00:58:00.831 My wife has left me on Cyprus. But she kissed me. 00:58:01.405 --> 00:58:04.135 - Who kissed you? - What 'who'? The mermaid. 00:58:07.122 --> 00:58:09.162 All the same, you should repair the sign. 00:58:12.041 --> 00:58:13.551 Perfect! Throw it! 00:58:20.719 --> 00:58:22.707 Alright, we've got the delivery. 00:58:28.197 --> 00:58:30.123 Alright, I can walk by myself. 00:58:32.116 --> 00:58:35.252 Kuzmich. What did he tell about the mermaids? 00:58:38.194 --> 00:58:41.704 Ever since we rescued him from the log, he's been out of his mind. 00:58:41.763 --> 00:58:43.813 He tells me about mermaids all the time. 00:58:43.874 --> 00:58:46.366 He keeps asking me if there are a lot of mermaids in these parts. 00:58:46.563 --> 00:58:48.963 - So, are there many? - Are you a materialist? 00:58:49.072 --> 00:58:51.702 I was a victimized materialist. 00:58:51.759 --> 00:58:55.401 I'm not a materialist for a long time. 'Cause a donstant contact with nature, 00:58:55.541 --> 00:58:58.283 with beautiful things lets change the angle of things. 00:58:58.449 --> 00:59:01.815 - Kuzmich, tell it in short. - You'll laugh at me, but they exist. 00:59:01.988 --> 00:59:05.258 No, I see it's hard to believe it, but it's true. 00:59:05.867 --> 00:59:07.097 You don't believe me? 00:59:09.626 --> 00:59:12.340 No. Kuzmich, introduce me to one then, huh? 00:59:13.906 --> 00:59:15.304 It's a deal. 00:59:15.904 --> 00:59:18.244 - What's this? - Meat dumplings. 00:59:21.863 --> 00:59:24.823 - But this is ravioli. - Well, they are meant dumplings. 00:59:26.462 --> 00:59:28.450 Yes, but it's ravioli. 00:59:29.301 --> 00:59:32.733 But they're meant dumplings first and foremost. 00:59:33.860 --> 00:59:35.848 They're dumplings, Mikhalych. 00:59:36.538 --> 00:59:37.936 Yeah, ravioli. 00:59:38.329 --> 00:59:39.947 Well done, Semyonov. 00:59:40.057 --> 00:59:43.321 If it wasn't for you, we'd be making ravioli for the whole night. 01:00:40.282 --> 01:00:41.792 Hey, is anybody here! 01:00:44.161 --> 01:00:49.514 People! Where are you? Kuzmich! 01:01:01.597 --> 01:01:03.251 - This one? - That's right. 01:01:07.775 --> 01:01:08.889 Hello. 01:01:10.166 --> 01:01:11.222 Hi. 01:01:11.910 --> 01:01:12.966 Ivanych! 01:01:13.054 --> 01:01:15.444 - Hello, guys! - Hello. 01:01:44.266 --> 01:01:46.804 - So, what do you think? - Good, bloody good. 01:01:47.336 --> 01:01:49.874 I'm talking about our deal, not about vodka. 01:01:50.024 --> 01:01:52.600 Alright, show me where you left the cargo. 01:01:57.002 --> 01:01:58.782 Here, in this region. 01:02:02.500 --> 01:02:04.118 But that's a foreign country! 01:02:05.070 --> 01:02:07.360 - Really? - Impossible. 01:02:07.418 --> 01:02:08.704 Unbelievable. 01:02:08.819 --> 01:02:12.755 - So what if it's a foreign country? - You're out of your mind, landlubber idiots! 01:02:12.918 --> 01:02:15.540 We go in quickly, load it and then go out. 01:02:15.998 --> 01:02:19.262 Do you understand in what kind of country you live? 01:02:20.257 --> 01:02:22.497 - Of course. Lyova. - Serghei. 01:02:23.816 --> 01:02:26.684 Semyonov, get in. The water is wonderful. 01:02:29.574 --> 01:02:32.838 A man should have constant contact with water. 01:02:34.733 --> 01:02:37.913 I don't mean that vulgar consumption of liquids. 01:02:39.891 --> 01:02:42.759 It goes without saying. I mean here - the contact. 01:02:43.250 --> 01:02:46.298 It's being at one with mother nature, 01:02:47.408 --> 01:02:49.396 with our creator. 01:02:57.807 --> 01:03:00.047 Semyonov, I'd go even further: 01:03:02.405 --> 01:03:05.669 we all came from water, and we'll all return to it. 01:03:06.063 --> 01:03:07.405 To this environment. 01:03:12.434 --> 01:03:13.720 Ah, that's great! 01:03:18.641 --> 01:03:22.409 Only amateurs talk that way: go there, come back. 01:03:22.801 --> 01:03:25.483 This is not a taxi, this is a combat vessel. 01:03:26.399 --> 01:03:28.929 I can dump an aircraft carrier. 01:03:29.737 --> 01:03:31.827 Well, if I'll get a chance, of course. 01:03:32.238 --> 01:03:34.528 And you're talking about some boxes. 01:03:35.038 --> 01:03:36.974 This isn't the right shed. 01:03:41.555 --> 01:03:43.065 Semyonov, come in, look. 01:03:45.214 --> 01:03:47.186 Do you know what it is? 01:03:47.597 --> 01:03:48.597 Plastic explosives. 01:03:49.483 --> 01:03:51.600 Where did Kuzmich get it? 01:03:52.712 --> 01:03:58.001 Nobody reported to me as yet about the theft of plastic explosives. 01:03:58.210 --> 01:03:59.324 Nobody? 01:04:02.630 --> 01:04:06.482 But never mind. Blow this stuff up, there'll be plenty of fish. 01:04:09.228 --> 01:04:12.618 Well, we'll do it not for us! The guys will come back, and we'll give them some fish. 01:04:12.728 --> 01:04:15.864 Well actually it goes beyond the law. It's poaching. 01:04:16.226 --> 01:04:20.162 So we should go further behind the island, further, it's quite there, no one will notice. 01:04:20.386 --> 01:04:23.986 What you are suggesting called diversion, got it? 01:04:24.625 --> 01:04:28.099 In any country it's called a diversionary operation. 01:04:29.023 --> 01:04:32.287 Let's not argue about the terms. Just think about it. 01:04:32.541 --> 01:04:34.305 - Lyova. - Sergei. 01:04:36.541 --> 01:04:38.781 We're not hurrying you, Ivanych. 01:04:42.020 --> 01:04:45.112 - There's no hurry. - We've plenty of time. 01:04:53.217 --> 01:04:55.507 It's not just sport or relaxation, 01:04:56.776 --> 01:05:00.586 it's a state of being, a repose from the worries of daily life. 01:05:01.016 --> 01:05:03.650 General, we won't be long! We just go there and back! 01:05:07.853 --> 01:05:10.813 After all, is it our fault that we were born in Russia? 01:05:12.612 --> 01:05:16.926 We need very little to be happy, not to lose the land under our feet: 01:05:17.850 --> 01:05:19.734 a sense of the Motherland, of the Universe. 01:05:21.009 --> 01:05:24.609 A quiet river, a small forest lake, and simple fishing equipment. 01:05:28.197 --> 01:05:31.259 We'll use a smoke screen, and no one will see. 01:05:31.465 --> 01:05:33.725 We'll abandone our belongings quickly and go home. 01:05:34.606 --> 01:05:37.828 You are so clever! Why don't you marching in uniform, 01:05:39.765 --> 01:05:42.399 and why don't you wear a pirate's sconce if you know it all, you landlubbing half-wits! 01:05:42.645 --> 01:05:45.327 - Where's the toilet? - To the left down the corridor. 01:05:45.453 --> 01:05:48.501 And put my coat on. This is a combat ship, after all. 01:05:48.561 --> 01:05:51.137 And you go here, as naked apes. 01:05:54.461 --> 01:05:57.465 Comrade Lieutenant-Captain. There's a package from headquarters. 01:05:57.561 --> 01:05:59.445 And sign here. 01:06:03.358 --> 01:06:06.664 You're to open it at the time specified on the envelope. 01:06:08.597 --> 01:06:10.107 Permission to leave? 01:06:12.195 --> 01:06:14.121 Leave, leave. 01:06:23.193 --> 01:06:26.241 We must be 20 meters away, or we'll blow ourselves up. 01:06:29.761 --> 01:06:31.689 Depth is small here. 01:06:31.741 --> 01:06:35.737 After the explosion, as a rule, only 10 to 12 per cent of the fish will float up. 01:06:35.851 --> 01:06:37.851 The rest of it will remain on the floor of the sea. 01:06:38.329 --> 01:06:42.013 Our mission is to collect the fish that will be on the surface. 01:06:42.147 --> 01:06:44.031 Until she pulled itself together. 01:06:44.349 --> 01:06:48.033 - Semyonov, is a current towards or away from us? - That l don't know. 01:06:49.676 --> 01:06:53.108 Full speed ahead, or we're done for! Semyonov! Full speed ahead! 01:06:53.246 --> 01:06:56.382 - Dear mother! Swim for your life! - Where are you going?! Go to the steering wheel! 01:06:56.777 --> 01:06:59.363 I'm running ahead! To which the steering wheel? 01:06:59.491 --> 01:07:02.839 Run to the fore, Prosecutor! Run to the fore, or we're done for! 01:07:03.211 --> 01:07:04.497 We're done for! 01:07:09.981 --> 01:07:13.623 How much vodka did you leave at the near border area? 01:07:14.500 --> 01:07:15.842 Sixteen. 01:07:16.038 --> 01:07:17.152 Boxes. 01:07:18.339 --> 01:07:21.069 - How much? - Only 15 left, to be exact. 01:07:22.657 --> 01:07:24.329 So it's ... 01:07:25.528 --> 01:07:28.876 You should have said that straight away. But you said 'we left a little'. 01:07:29.076 --> 01:07:31.944 - Can you show me the exact place? - Yes. 01:07:35.574 --> 01:07:39.468 It's an uninhabited area. lt would be better to go by submarine. 01:07:40.083 --> 01:07:42.829 - In a "Baby-Sub"? - How do you know? 01:07:42.930 --> 01:07:45.060 It's a state secret! 01:07:45.172 --> 01:07:48.700 Last year we took it to the island to go berry-picking. 01:07:49.811 --> 01:07:53.579 - Who took off my sandals? - Maybe, the explosion tore them off. Are you OK? 01:07:53.971 --> 01:07:59.441 I'm OK but my feet are wet. And why are you shouting at me? 01:08:01.168 --> 01:08:03.258 I thought you were shell-shocked. 01:08:04.047 --> 01:08:06.437 - And where's our boat? - It sank. 01:08:07.166 --> 01:08:10.598 Kuzmich will be upset. He liked it. What will we do? 01:08:10.816 --> 01:08:12.956 Maybe we should swim to the shore, huh? 01:08:13.145 --> 01:08:15.335 It's good that it happened in the summer. 01:08:16.042 --> 01:08:19.349 If it had been autumn or spring, we'd die from exposure. 01:08:19.653 --> 01:08:23.883 If they didn't get a pilot shot down over the Baltic in 20 minutes, 01:08:24.020 --> 01:08:25.693 he was frozen to death. 01:08:25.961 --> 01:08:30.064 If they got him in time, they could warm him up. Bring him back to life. 01:08:30.600 --> 01:08:33.573 The best way to warm him up were two women from each side. 01:08:33.627 --> 01:08:36.020 They succeed to warm him up best of all. 01:08:36.240 --> 01:08:40.158 Lots of them had their eyes pecked out by seagulls. 01:08:40.877 --> 01:08:43.925 The eyes glitter in the sunshine, so they peck them out. 01:08:44.158 --> 01:08:46.996 Can't you think of anything more cheerful? 01:08:47.055 --> 01:08:48.827 You talk such rubbish! 01:08:48.966 --> 01:08:52.283 Birds are very responsive to shiny objects. 01:08:54.474 --> 01:08:57.011 - My name is Vasily. - Serghei. 01:09:03.892 --> 01:09:06.182 The second battle shift, intercede! 01:09:06.600 --> 01:09:10.002 What are you doing here? I told you to get the landlubbings to the land! 01:09:10.149 --> 01:09:13.845 Our training exercises have begun. Kuzmich, have you seen a package from headquarters? 01:09:14.309 --> 01:09:17.193 A secret one? Lyova wanted to open it yesterday. 01:09:17.247 --> 01:09:18.912 You ask him. 01:09:18.988 --> 01:09:21.781 I need it as much as a hedgehog needs a T-shirt. 01:09:22.287 --> 01:09:25.479 Serghei got it, he signed the receipt. 01:09:25.654 --> 01:09:27.158 Oh, my head hurts. 01:09:27.247 --> 01:09:30.997 Why can we never sit and talk in a civilized manner, 01:09:31.104 --> 01:09:33.165 do we always need to drink. 01:09:34.385 --> 01:09:36.057 Where is the package? 01:09:37.303 --> 01:09:41.238 - Anyway, is there any left? - My plan of actions is in it. 01:09:42.142 --> 01:09:44.624 We've got training exercises with live shooting. 01:09:45.301 --> 01:09:48.607 And I don't know which way to shoot. Where is the package? 01:09:49.490 --> 01:09:53.576 Like a broken record! Ivanych, have you got any left? 01:09:53.707 --> 01:09:56.846 We should have a hair of the dog, then look for it. 01:09:57.016 --> 01:09:59.226 He should be somewhere here - we didn't go anywhere, did we? 01:09:59.276 --> 01:10:00.643 Yes. 01:10:00.757 --> 01:10:04.879 I will be at the location in 20 minutes, and I don't know the procedure. 01:10:07.935 --> 01:10:10.757 - Do you have any children, Vasily? - No. 01:10:11.214 --> 01:10:14.394 - How old are you? - Nearly thirty-four. 01:10:15.374 --> 01:10:17.664 Nearly... And you haven't lived at all yet. 01:10:20.253 --> 01:10:23.257 What are you talking about? Stop this nonsense. 01:10:25.290 --> 01:10:28.680 - Sorry. You should be realistic. - Semyonov! 01:10:29.120 --> 01:10:32.212 - Look the danger bravely in the face. - Follow me! 01:10:32.333 --> 01:10:33.951 Vasily, where are you going? 01:10:34.073 --> 01:10:35.945 - Vasily! - Paddle! 01:10:40.006 --> 01:10:43.732 The explosion must have lifted it up from the bottom. Or it must be the storm. 01:10:46.685 --> 01:10:49.689 There's very little time, I have to open the package. 01:10:50.645 --> 01:10:54.161 Good God, what made me get mixed with you, landlubbers. 01:10:55.623 --> 01:10:58.887 - Where can l get some water? - There's water all around. 01:11:00.430 --> 01:11:01.456 I'm done! 01:11:01.601 --> 01:11:04.943 Don't worry. Everything will be OK, even alright. 01:11:05.111 --> 01:11:07.891 A grappling hook and knob up your holes! 01:11:08.088 --> 01:11:10.038 You liquid fuel oil under grease! 01:11:10.201 --> 01:11:11.555 Although never mind. 01:11:11.619 --> 01:11:14.397 The detonator of sea mine needs to be hit very hard 01:11:14.678 --> 01:11:16.718 to set the mine off, 01:11:17.277 --> 01:11:21.507 otherwise an occasional storm or fish, any of it, would explode all mines. 01:11:25.195 --> 01:11:27.079 Hey! We're over here! Save us! 01:11:35.912 --> 01:11:39.428 So interesting - our whistles play in one tonality. 01:11:41.111 --> 01:11:42.509 What are you talking about? 01:11:42.830 --> 01:11:46.820 We could play some simple melody. Bolero, for example. 01:11:46.879 --> 01:11:50.641 If you don't like classical music, something modern. 01:11:50.827 --> 01:11:52.271 What d'you think, Vasya, huh? 01:11:52.357 --> 01:11:55.285 I, for example, like the Early Beatles. 01:11:55.448 --> 01:11:57.060 Semyonov, are you an idiot? 01:12:01.905 --> 01:12:04.539 - Do I look like an idiot? - You do. 01:12:05.904 --> 01:12:09.126 Excuse me, where can I get a drink of water? 01:12:09.264 --> 01:12:11.704 - Upstairs. - Thank you. 01:12:12.343 --> 01:12:13.853 Battle stations! 01:12:22.900 --> 01:12:26.500 - Prepare missiles for action! - Missiles are prepared for action! 01:12:45.388 --> 01:12:46.952 Where are you going, Ivanych? 01:12:47.092 --> 01:12:50.184 What the hell have you done, you streak of sea-scum?! 01:12:50.294 --> 01:12:53.558 I just wanted a drink of water, but none of the buttons work. 01:12:53.812 --> 01:12:57.916 How did this mixture of sea-scum monkey and sprat get on board my ship? 01:12:58.970 --> 01:13:02.948 - Sir, have the missiles gone? - You know, go and have a look. 01:13:03.210 --> 01:13:05.640 How should I know? Why me again? 01:13:05.840 --> 01:13:07.848 - What? - Checking the rockets, sir! 01:13:08.008 --> 01:13:11.182 The sergeant Kurtov, check visually if the missiles are gone! 01:13:11.270 --> 01:13:13.090 Ivanych, was there shooting? 01:13:13.237 --> 01:13:16.033 All my life l've dreamt of seeing how missiles fly. 01:13:16.087 --> 01:13:18.059 The same with me. 01:13:18.136 --> 01:13:19.506 Did you shoot well? 01:13:19.507 --> 01:13:21.904 Ask him if did he shoot well. 01:13:22.105 --> 01:13:24.531 Buttons! I thought it was about water. There were the signs: 01:13:24.532 --> 01:13:26.449 with bubbles, without bubbles. And there's a cup here. 01:13:26.745 --> 01:13:28.785 Why do you confuse the people? 01:13:28.883 --> 01:13:32.369 What do you know about naval humor? You landlubbing... 01:13:32.562 --> 01:13:34.972 Comrade Commander! The missiles have been launched. [Comrade Commander! The unstated launching happened!] 01:13:44.399 --> 01:13:46.839 - What was that? - What will happen to us? 01:13:48.239 --> 01:13:50.123 It looks like they fired missiles. 01:14:03.256 --> 01:14:04.016 Oh! 01:14:07.792 --> 01:14:11.056 Comrade Lieutenant Captain, the Commander - is on the line. 01:14:11.472 --> 01:14:13.036 Dear God, why? 01:14:14.151 --> 01:14:16.489 Captain, the Commander is on the line. 01:14:18.211 --> 01:14:20.693 Tug-boats, thank you for the mission. 01:14:22.789 --> 01:14:25.127 Permission to return to base, over. 01:14:25.948 --> 01:14:29.548 Comrade Commander, the Captain of the missile boat is on the line. 01:14:33.466 --> 01:14:37.444 Commander is speaking. Excellent work, Captain of the third rank. 01:14:37.626 --> 01:14:40.718 No, that's not a mistake, you have been promoted. 01:14:43.623 --> 01:14:46.971 That's the way, comrades: two missiles, two hits. 01:14:47.863 --> 01:14:48.919 So? 01:14:50.242 --> 01:14:51.356 What happened? 01:14:54.281 --> 01:14:56.207 They've promoted me. 01:14:56.358 --> 01:14:58.346 We must have hit something. 01:14:58.619 --> 01:15:01.667 You say! I would've been surprised if we'd missed. 01:15:03.078 --> 01:15:06.606 You should see Serghei hunting, with a Remington in his hands! 01:15:06.696 --> 01:15:08.116 And there are the missiles here... 01:15:08.328 --> 01:15:10.040 Set course for base! 01:15:10.196 --> 01:15:13.272 - Let's celebrate the promotion. - And our shooting skills. 01:15:24.133 --> 01:15:26.663 Semyonov, don't whistle, or you won't have money. 01:15:26.993 --> 01:15:29.693 - Watch out, there's a mine! - It's a fake, for training. 01:15:29.790 --> 01:15:31.840 It missed since last year. 01:15:32.061 --> 01:15:35.877 What are you doing in the military training zone? 01:15:36.030 --> 01:15:37.312 Fishing. 01:15:37.898 --> 01:15:40.644 - Kuzmich! Lyova! - Come on, get up! 01:15:40.738 --> 01:15:44.122 - The fishermen, my foot! - Now we'll fire into the mine. 01:15:44.309 --> 01:15:45.363 We're saved! 01:15:46.847 --> 01:15:49.623 Thank you, I can't drink any more water. 01:15:49.857 --> 01:15:52.357 Semyonov, what were you doing here? 01:15:52.445 --> 01:15:55.913 - Kuzmich, are you a brave man? - Well, I have my moments. 01:15:56.124 --> 01:15:59.535 Then, you must face it with honor: 01:15:59.536 --> 01:16:00.672 your boat sank. 01:16:05.362 --> 01:16:08.322 Prepare to eliminate the training mine. Fire! 01:16:13.600 --> 01:16:14.886 It's not fake. 01:16:40.913 --> 01:16:43.053 Faster! What are you doing there? How long I can wait for you? 01:16:57.188 --> 01:17:01.124 Hello. This is the senior commando, a specialist in secret operations. 01:17:02.347 --> 01:17:04.737 - Kuzmich. - Lyova. 01:17:05.467 --> 01:17:07.557 Serghei Olegovich. Hello. 01:17:08.586 --> 01:17:10.204 Vityok. What do you want? 01:17:11.305 --> 01:17:14.653 It's not far from here. To take our things. Just there and back. 01:17:28.340 --> 01:17:29.570 Interesting. 01:17:43.736 --> 01:17:46.696 Interesting. When he had time to be there? 01:17:48.735 --> 01:17:51.025 He never told us about being in Africa. 01:17:54.523 --> 01:17:56.867 They're getting up to their tricks again. 01:17:57.033 --> 01:18:00.657 Owner of a province hotel arrested by Police of Finland 01:18:00.871 --> 01:18:03.343 for the possession of smuggled vodka. 01:18:03.511 --> 01:18:05.501 This is the largest amount 01:18:05.592 --> 01:18:09.042 brought to Finland in recent times... 01:18:09.170 --> 01:18:10.604 That means it wasn't a dream. 01:18:10.679 --> 01:18:13.715 Semyonov, do you have any contacts in the Finnish Republic? 01:18:13.869 --> 01:18:17.253 I do, but they are of a private nature. A Finnish writer. 01:18:17.329 --> 01:18:20.105 Last autumn l took him hunting. Hunting elk. 01:18:20.737 --> 01:18:23.873 - Why? - There's a shed we have to open. 01:18:23.945 --> 01:18:27.305 - Urgently. It's the third day... - What do you mean? 01:18:27.405 --> 01:18:29.641 He agreed! You know I called upon 01:18:29.781 --> 01:18:32.937 his professional patriotic pride. 01:18:33.103 --> 01:18:35.113 Because at first he refused. 01:18:36.084 --> 01:18:38.020 We leave in two hours! 01:18:39.162 --> 01:18:43.014 Right, Semyonov, do what you want but you just get my boat back! 01:18:45.160 --> 01:18:47.594 Alright, if God let us we must get back by tomorrow morning. 01:18:51.289 --> 01:18:53.693 We need to get some scuba drivers. 01:18:53.898 --> 01:18:57.762 You must call your Finn in Finland, and tell him to open the shed. 01:19:00.156 --> 01:19:04.035 God, three days... 01:19:05.475 --> 01:19:09.201 Vodka. Vodka is the uniquest invention of our people. 01:19:10.474 --> 01:19:13.566 It's not just a strong drink like any other. 01:19:14.234 --> 01:19:17.370 It's a nationality, a national character. 01:19:17.923 --> 01:19:22.123 It is what protects all of us from total disintegration, 01:19:22.351 --> 01:19:26.155 bearing in mind we are reasonable enough 01:19:26.271 --> 01:19:28.199 when consuming it. 01:19:37.387 --> 01:19:40.693 Our vodka uses natural, soft water, 01:19:42.865 --> 01:19:46.843 which, alongside with cereals, gives it a special taste. 01:19:48.624 --> 01:19:52.476 In other countries they use distillation 01:19:53.782 --> 01:19:56.962 and boiling, but here we only use pure, filtered water. 01:19:57.462 --> 01:20:01.104 That is why our vodka is superior to other drinks, 01:20:02.060 --> 01:20:05.744 such as the French Frambois or ltalian Grappa. And Cynar. 01:20:07.979 --> 01:20:11.957 That's without even mentioning rum. From the best - Cuban one to the worst - from Haiti. 01:20:15.537 --> 01:20:17.525 Right, where's everybody gone? 01:20:20.376 --> 01:20:23.290 Kuzmich, is it called Baby? 01:20:23.856 --> 01:20:26.570 It's navi after all. It's called that on purpose, 01:20:27.694 --> 01:20:31.126 to confuse the enemy and other rubber-necks. 01:20:32.292 --> 01:20:36.060 Attention! You are on board a military underwater craft! 01:20:37.771 --> 01:20:41.329 It's not a ferry-boat for you, so don't touch anything, 01:20:41.611 --> 01:20:44.875 don't press any buttons, and don't ask stupid questions. 01:20:46.228 --> 01:20:48.230 - Are there any questions? - No. 01:20:48.298 --> 01:20:50.428 We'll be submerging in five minutes. 01:20:50.628 --> 01:20:54.492 - Kuzmich. Kuzmich, have you already been on it? - I have. 01:20:55.127 --> 01:20:56.907 Do they have a toilet? 01:20:57.126 --> 01:21:00.130 Everybody to their places. Fasten safety belts. 01:21:03.684 --> 01:21:06.644 What are the belts for? Are we going to fly? 01:21:07.763 --> 01:21:10.943 So that people like you stay put 01:21:11.523 --> 01:21:15.501 and not wander around the toilets or sink water down the pan... and there... 01:21:17.761 --> 01:21:20.983 - What can be in there? - Anything, got it? 01:21:21.201 --> 01:21:22.315 We're off! 01:21:27.578 --> 01:21:28.634 Lyova ... 01:21:30.517 --> 01:21:31.859 We're diving. 01:21:38.605 --> 01:21:40.795 So, where did you sink the boat? 01:21:40.935 --> 01:21:43.849 - Over there, l think. - I think, over there. 01:21:44.595 --> 01:21:46.933 Do you remember any landmarks? 01:21:46.993 --> 01:21:50.803 There was a lot of water, a horrible amount of seagulls, and a mine was floating. 01:21:53.431 --> 01:21:54.545 Understood. 01:21:56.351 --> 01:21:58.927 This isn't it, it's a shed. And this... 01:22:01.189 --> 01:22:03.073 Look, isn't this your one? 01:22:08.347 --> 01:22:11.989 No it isn't that. Ours was a bit more respectable, and more buildings around it. 01:22:13.506 --> 01:22:14.904 We'll keep looking. 01:22:16.505 --> 01:22:19.509 This definitely isn't yours. And this maybe... 01:22:22.944 --> 01:22:26.502 - Probably Russians. - Yeah... They've probably got lost again. 01:22:29.182 --> 01:22:32.446 - This is it, right here. - Here. Definitely here. 01:22:38.940 --> 01:22:40.972 This one maybe? Take a look. 01:22:41.419 --> 01:22:44.241 It sort of looks familiar. Lyova, take a look. 01:22:47.197 --> 01:22:49.437 - Well? - Yes. 01:22:49.617 --> 01:22:52.051 The cat is sitting there. It stole our fish. 01:22:53.006 --> 01:22:54.142 What fish? 01:22:54.319 --> 01:22:57.141 What kind of fish they have got? They haven't got any fish! 01:22:57.255 --> 01:23:00.447 You come to my lodge, l will show you loads of fish. 01:23:00.640 --> 01:23:02.960 You have never seen such fish! 01:23:03.053 --> 01:23:04.795 And who is that? lnteresting. 01:23:11.251 --> 01:23:14.073 We're off on the mission. ln charge will be... 01:23:14.249 --> 01:23:15.945 Let will be Lyova. 01:23:16.070 --> 01:23:19.058 - What is your rank? - Major, homicide department. 01:23:19.289 --> 01:23:23.195 - You will work. Don't touch anything. - Got it! - Don't untie this. 01:23:23.648 --> 01:23:26.996 - And don't press any buttons. - Lyova, is there a toilet here? 01:23:28.687 --> 01:23:32.287 In the navy, we call it the head. Serghei, just be patient, don't you? 01:23:45.965 --> 01:23:46.963 Let's go. 01:24:04.917 --> 01:24:05.857 Quiet. 01:24:08.375 --> 01:24:10.259 Something's not right here. 01:24:12.901 --> 01:24:14.213 Oh! What is this? 01:24:14.415 --> 01:24:17.389 I've only been gone for two days, and they've laid hands on it! 01:24:21.393 --> 01:24:22.507 It's closed. 01:24:26.312 --> 01:24:27.426 Very impressive. 01:24:31.390 --> 01:24:32.562 Wow, Raimo! 01:24:33.950 --> 01:24:37.550 Lyova, I need to go to the head. My will is finishing to be patient. 01:24:37.628 --> 01:24:40.676 You can wait with your head! No time for you. 01:24:41.228 --> 01:24:44.450 No, ours wasn't made of wood. Ours was iron. Keep looking. 01:24:45.628 --> 01:24:48.764 The current is strong here. It could have gone further. [Semyonov, is there any marks?] 01:24:50.225 --> 01:24:53.405 There was a clock on the steering wheel, in a metal housing. 01:24:54.725 --> 01:24:58.703 There was a clock on the steering wheel, in a metal housing. [Is it a mark?] 01:24:59.693 --> 01:25:03.821 Are there so many boats down there? Can't you pick ours? 01:25:03.902 --> 01:25:05.540 - Kuzmich! - What? 01:25:05.642 --> 01:25:08.066 - There are some strange guys up there. - Where? 01:25:08.128 --> 01:25:09.710 They went to the shed. 01:25:09.900 --> 01:25:12.090 And I saw Raimo by the shed. 01:25:13.899 --> 01:25:17.583 Are you crazy? You're hallucinating! Where did he come from? 01:25:17.737 --> 01:25:20.467 - Stop babbling! Take this! - Go on! 01:25:21.897 --> 01:25:22.837 Freeze! Who's there? 01:25:23.897 --> 01:25:27.497 My friends called me and asked me to open this shed. 01:25:28.615 --> 01:25:31.663 Hi, my friends told me to open this shed... 01:25:39.533 --> 01:25:40.819 One, two. 01:25:47.291 --> 01:25:48.405 We've been spotted. 01:25:49.890 --> 01:25:52.380 - What's happening? - There was an ambush. 01:25:53.890 --> 01:25:55.670 And what happened? 01:25:59.007 --> 01:26:00.237 They are tying us up. 01:26:01.608 --> 01:26:03.062 We've got you. 01:26:04.066 --> 01:26:06.842 - It won't come down. - Lyova, can I help you? 01:26:06.924 --> 01:26:09.164 Well, tell me what do we do now? 01:26:10.285 --> 01:26:13.759 - That's the lot. We've made it. - Can I go to the toilet now? 01:26:15.603 --> 01:26:17.113 Let me look... 01:26:18.783 --> 01:26:20.667 So what was their plan! 01:26:22.361 --> 01:26:25.835 Never mind, they never took Vityok with bared hands! 01:26:27.040 --> 01:26:30.892 Maybe we should surrender? We'll say we just got lost. 01:26:32.119 --> 01:26:35.509 Shut up, you ballast! We've got out of worse fixes. 01:26:36.650 --> 01:26:38.238 You shouldn't piss in wineglass. 01:26:38.377 --> 01:26:40.733 That's exactly what I'd like to do. 01:26:42.117 --> 01:26:43.515 Hold tight! 01:26:48.275 --> 01:26:49.839 Give me another rope! 01:27:01.111 --> 01:27:03.979 Lord, isn't there a simple toilet 01:27:04.590 --> 01:27:07.458 on such an advanced submarine? I mean the head. 01:27:11.189 --> 01:27:12.807 With God's help, we're off! 01:27:32.983 --> 01:27:36.119 - What should we do? - Fight. 01:27:36.703 --> 01:27:40.063 Lord, great fishing... 01:27:40.261 --> 01:27:43.747 We're almost out of fuel. Pour some vodka into the tank, or we won't go away. 01:27:45.340 --> 01:27:47.320 - Vodka into here? - Into here! 01:27:47.578 --> 01:27:49.684 Are you crazy, this is vodka! 01:27:49.816 --> 01:27:51.514 - Lyova! - Wait a minute. 01:27:51.668 --> 01:27:53.910 Does it run on vodka? 01:27:54.044 --> 01:27:56.984 It runs on anything that burns. Pour! 01:27:57.076 --> 01:28:00.400 Lyova! It is better to be free without vodka than to be in prison with vodka. 01:28:00.595 --> 01:28:01.847 Get on with it! 01:28:01.977 --> 01:28:04.337 - Lyova! - What "Lyova"? Come on! 01:28:06.654 --> 01:28:07.884 Like this... 01:28:16.012 --> 01:28:17.522 She's moving, the beauty! 01:28:43.425 --> 01:28:46.659 - Did you have a box? - What wooden box? 01:28:46.884 --> 01:28:50.118 - Did we have a wooden box at the boat? - Yes. lt was at the back. 01:28:51.523 --> 01:28:54.053 Yes, there was a wooden box on the stern. [Semyonov, I'll get it then] 01:28:57.321 --> 01:28:59.707 So, get the box at least. 01:29:04.559 --> 01:29:06.799 I've got it. lt's heavy. 01:29:10.958 --> 01:29:12.738 A very interesting chest. 01:29:15.596 --> 01:29:17.214 Cognac. Year 1804. 01:29:17.516 --> 01:29:20.762 That was the year they declared Napoleon emperor of France. 01:29:20.854 --> 01:29:23.926 Before that he was a simple consul for the rest of his life. 01:29:24.114 --> 01:29:25.856 Is cognac a good thing? 01:29:25.994 --> 01:29:29.552 - French one, it's almost 200 years old. - I've never tried anything like it. 01:29:29.553 --> 01:29:32.458 200 years old. Such an old vintage! 01:29:32.601 --> 01:29:35.420 All the stars on our lapels wouldn't be enough! 01:29:36.231 --> 01:29:39.537 - Vityok, this is the fifteenth box. - Pour! We're going well. 01:29:40.049 --> 01:29:40.989 Yes, sir! 01:29:45.149 --> 01:29:46.875 She's never run better. 01:29:48.268 --> 01:29:51.370 I'd like to see what kind of an engineer 01:29:51.575 --> 01:29:53.751 built a vodka-consuming engine? 01:29:53.926 --> 01:29:56.276 Right you are. This is the last one. 01:30:10.521 --> 01:30:14.467 Oh! Kuzmich, and you wouldn't believe me. Take a look. 01:30:16.821 --> 01:30:18.439 Vityok, let's go up: 01:30:19.720 --> 01:30:23.122 We're dragging half of Finland after us, including a civilian. 01:30:23.338 --> 01:30:24.422 Raimo ... 01:30:24.569 --> 01:30:28.601 Such a cognac is rare, it can be acquired only at international auctions. 01:30:28.748 --> 01:30:31.750 - How much would it cost? - Very expensive. 01:30:31.867 --> 01:30:35.305 We could never buy the like. And never taste it. 01:30:35.500 --> 01:30:37.428 Why should we? We've got it. 01:30:44.533 --> 01:30:46.521 I've never seen anything like it. 01:30:57.450 --> 01:30:59.490 This is what l'd like to say. 01:31:00.369 --> 01:31:03.549 Destiny brought us together, we were like living next door, 01:31:04.968 --> 01:31:09.941 we live quietly but we didn't notice each other. 01:31:10.000 --> 01:31:11.333 And then - this adventure happened to us. 01:31:12.046 --> 01:31:14.960 To us remembering this summer forever! 01:31:16.006 --> 01:31:18.966 That we be happy as we are now. 01:31:19.964 --> 01:31:26.355 - And I'd also like to say... - So, to fishing! 01:31:26.922 --> 01:31:28.634 Ask Lyova. 01:31:28.725 --> 01:31:31.737 I ask you was vodka good that you have left? 01:31:31.922 --> 01:31:34.836 - Is there any other kind? - Golden words of truth. 01:31:36.200 --> 01:31:38.340 I caught this massive bream! 01:31:38.519 --> 01:31:42.455 I'll show you how we fish! There is nothing like our fishing! 01:31:44.358 --> 01:31:46.084 Oh, come on! 01:31:47.357 --> 01:31:49.933 Your fishing is just sitting and staring at the float. 01:31:52.596 --> 01:31:55.860 But with us it's much more fun. We can sit and have a talk. 01:31:57.035 --> 01:31:59.839 We can rest to our heart's content in a cultural way. 01:32:01.433 --> 01:32:04.949 Could I have a cigarette? I din't smoke for all the day. 01:32:05.873 --> 01:32:07.861 Why didn't you ask earlier. 01:32:08.791 --> 01:32:11.751 Try one of ours. It's not one of your scummy foreign ciggies with grease. 01:32:13.790 --> 01:32:17.264 We've rested nicely. I've never had such good fishing. 01:32:18.439 --> 01:32:21.757 What are you talking about, Mikhalych? I know places 01:32:21.987 --> 01:32:24.871 where such kind of fish jump out of the water. Let's go there now... 01:33:15.247 --> 01:33:17.238 Starring: 01:33:17.407 --> 01:33:20.399 Alexei Buldakov as the General 01:33:20.567 --> 01:33:23.559 Victor Bychkov as Kuzmich 01:33:26.727 --> 01:33:29.719 Semyon Strugachev as Lyova 01:33:32.887 --> 01:33:35.879 Serghei Russkin as Serghei 01:33:38.047 --> 01:33:41.039 Serghei Gusinsky as Semyonov 01:33:44.247 --> 01:33:47.239 Vasily Domrachev as the Prosecutor 01:33:50.407 --> 01:33:53.399 Alexei Sevastyanov as the Captain-Lieutenant 01:33:56.567 --> 01:33:59.559 Andrei Krasko as Vityok 01:34:02.727 --> 01:34:05.560 Ville Haapasalo as Raimo 01:34:08.567 --> 01:34:11.559 Written and directed by Alexander Rogozhkin 01:34:14.727 --> 01:34:17.719 Director of photography - Valery Martynov 01:34:20.887 --> 01:34:23.879 Production designers - V. Kartashov, E. Zhukova 01:34:24.047 --> 01:34:27.039 Music by Vladislav Panchenko 01:34:27.247 --> 01:34:30.239 Executive producer - Dmitry Delov 01:34:30.407 --> 01:34:33.399 Produced by Serghei Selyanov, lgor Kalenov 01:34:33.409 --> 01:34:35.899 Переведено на Нотабеноиде 01:34:35.909 --> 01:34:36.899 Переводчики: mykstery, olhy, Anjelika9, Esmal 01:34:36.909 --> 01:34:37.899 samezzz, swiftlv