1 00:00:05,356 --> 00:00:12,521 [Dr. Drennan] "Wow...you must be smart!" 2 00:00:12,521 --> 00:00:15,361 That's what people say to me when the 3 00:00:15,361 --> 00:00:17,309 conversation comes around, and they 4 00:00:17,309 --> 00:00:19,870 find out what I do for a living. So, I am 5 00:00:19,870 --> 00:00:21,631 a professor of Chemistry and Biology in 6 00:00:21,631 --> 00:00:24,020 the Massachusetts Institute of Technology 7 00:00:24,020 --> 00:00:27,961 known as M.I.T. They say, "Wow...M.I.T., 8 00:00:27,961 --> 00:00:32,968 wow...professor...You must be smart!" 9 00:00:32,968 --> 00:00:34,714 Sometimes they say that and they walk 10 00:00:34,714 --> 00:00:37,066 away. Other times they say that looking 11 00:00:37,066 --> 00:00:39,459 at me, waiting for me to respond, either 12 00:00:39,459 --> 00:00:41,555 in the affirmative, or deny the fact that 13 00:00:41,555 --> 00:00:44,074 maybe I am smart. But what they don't 14 00:00:44,074 --> 00:00:46,914 realize is that, asking me if I am smart, 15 00:00:46,914 --> 00:00:49,994 is a really complicated question for me 16 00:00:49,994 --> 00:00:51,940 to answer. 17 00:00:51,940 --> 00:00:54,713 So, think about what it is to be smart. 18 00:00:54,713 --> 00:00:56,912 There's....usually when you ask someone, 19 00:00:56,912 --> 00:00:58,476 they'll come up with characteristics of a 20 00:00:58,476 --> 00:01:02,786 smart person. They'll say, "Hmm...good 21 00:01:02,786 --> 00:01:05,189 problems solver." or "A lot of knowledge 22 00:01:05,189 --> 00:01:08,102 on a particular topic." , "Able to take 23 00:01:08,102 --> 00:01:10,767 information and see things in that 24 00:01:10,767 --> 00:01:13,410 information that other people might 25 00:01:13,410 --> 00:01:17,162 miss. " "Success in a field." All of 26 00:01:17,162 --> 00:01:18,869 these are characteristics of a smart 27 00:01:18,869 --> 00:01:21,529 person. All of those are characteristics 28 00:01:21,529 --> 00:01:24,493 of me. But there are also other 29 00:01:24,493 --> 00:01:27,222 characteristics not really normally 30 00:01:27,222 --> 00:01:30,465 associated with a smart person, such as, 31 00:01:30,465 --> 00:01:32,842 "Having been in a remedial class in 32 00:01:32,842 --> 00:01:36,650 school."--Having had to repeat a grade. 33 00:01:36,650 --> 00:01:38,410 Those are things that are also true about 34 00:01:38,410 --> 00:01:43,696 me. So smart, but learning disabled. That 35 00:01:43,696 --> 00:01:46,372 was a term that my elementary school 36 00:01:46,372 --> 00:01:48,984 teachers used for me. So what is Learning 37 00:01:48,984 --> 00:01:51,312 Disability? What is being Learning Disabled? 38 00:01:51,312 --> 00:01:54,422 When you think about that, you learn 39 00:01:54,422 --> 00:01:56,323 differently. If there is a bunch of 40 00:01:56,323 --> 00:01:58,377 information, you may see it in a different 41 00:01:58,377 --> 00:02:01,294 way. You may make connections between 42 00:02:01,294 --> 00:02:04,580 that information that other people miss. 43 00:02:04,580 --> 00:02:06,179 So there's definitely parallels...I just 44 00:02:06,179 --> 00:02:07,941 described two things: one for smart and 45 00:02:07,941 --> 00:02:09,585 one for Learning Disabled, that were the 46 00:02:09,585 --> 00:02:11,339 same. 47 00:02:12,249 --> 00:02:14,421 So...I was a pretty odd kid, I have to say. 48 00:02:14,421 --> 00:02:16,142 My parents were older when I was born, and 49 00:02:16,142 --> 00:02:20,359 I was an only child, and my parents really 50 00:02:20,359 --> 00:02:22,507 didn't know all that much about raising 51 00:02:22,507 --> 00:02:24,828 children, to be honest with you. We would 52 00:02:24,828 --> 00:02:26,626 talk about politics at the dinner table 53 00:02:26,626 --> 00:02:29,335 when I was 5 years old. I worked on my 54 00:02:29,335 --> 00:02:33,066 first political campaign when I was 6. 55 00:02:33,066 --> 00:02:34,721 So when I started first grade, I was 56 00:02:34,721 --> 00:02:36,712 discussing with my first grade teacher 57 00:02:36,712 --> 00:02:38,551 what I thought about International Trade 58 00:02:38,551 --> 00:02:41,639 Agreements, and they decided that, "Wow... 59 00:02:41,639 --> 00:02:43,810 she must be a smart kid!"- so they put me 60 00:02:43,810 --> 00:02:47,946 in the top reading group. Then I went 61 00:02:47,946 --> 00:02:49,956 down, maybe I'd be more comfortable in 62 00:02:49,956 --> 00:02:52,828 the second from top, and then when I hit 63 00:02:52,828 --> 00:02:56,872 rock bottom, and still was below what the 64 00:02:56,872 --> 00:02:58,894 other kids in this bottom reading group 65 00:02:58,894 --> 00:03:00,257 were able to do, it was time to talk to my 66 00:03:00,257 --> 00:03:03,805 parents and say, "She seems smart, but, 67 00:03:03,805 --> 00:03:07,695 she can't learn to read." So somewhere 68 00:03:07,695 --> 00:03:09,371 between first and second grade, I was 69 00:03:09,371 --> 00:03:12,102 diagnosed as being Dyslexic. And my 70 00:03:12,102 --> 00:03:14,574 parents were pulled aside, and said, "You 71 00:03:14,574 --> 00:03:16,985 know, you should prepare yourself. Her 72 00:03:16,985 --> 00:03:19,158 Dyslexia is so severe, that she is probably 73 00:03:19,158 --> 00:03:20,710 not going to be able to graduate from high 74 00:03:20,710 --> 00:03:24,792 school. But--my parents got me extra 75 00:03:24,792 --> 00:03:28,027 tutoring, and the second time through 76 00:03:28,027 --> 00:03:32,094 sixth grade, I learned to read. So the way 77 00:03:32,094 --> 00:03:33,810 that I read--I don't know how normal 78 00:03:33,810 --> 00:03:35,874 people read, but I don't think I read like 79 00:03:35,874 --> 00:03:38,935 that. So what I did the second time through 80 00:03:38,935 --> 00:03:40,984 sixth grade is, I memorized the shapes of 81 00:03:40,984 --> 00:03:44,407 words, and I memorized what words looked 82 00:03:44,407 --> 00:03:47,836 like that shape, and then what that word 83 00:03:47,836 --> 00:03:51,402 sounds like, and what that word means. It 84 00:03:51,402 --> 00:03:53,626 took a ~lot~ of time to memorize the shapes 85 00:03:53,626 --> 00:03:55,600 of all of the words that you might encounter 86 00:03:55,600 --> 00:03:58,617 in a book. But once I had done that, 87 00:03:58,617 --> 00:04:02,150 I could read. So, after I finished sixth 88 00:04:02,150 --> 00:04:04,926 grade the second time, my father retired, 89 00:04:04,926 --> 00:04:06,630 he was older, and we moved to a 90 00:04:06,630 --> 00:04:08,884 different state, and I started in another 91 00:04:08,884 --> 00:04:13,401 school. I had been in the remedial class 92 00:04:13,401 --> 00:04:16,840 in sixth grade, and then I was mainstreamed 93 00:04:16,840 --> 00:04:19,280 in seventh grade. All of a sudden, I 94 00:04:19,280 --> 00:04:21,493 started doing really well, and I went to 95 00:04:21,493 --> 00:04:24,032 the top of the class. I had an English 96 00:04:24,032 --> 00:04:26,320 teacher that said I was one of her best 97 00:04:26,320 --> 00:04:30,616 students ever. English...me! Best students. 98 00:04:30,616 --> 00:04:32,362 And so then the kids started teasing me 99 00:04:32,362 --> 00:04:35,854 about being smart. From the bottom to 100 00:04:35,854 --> 00:04:37,982 the very top, teased on one end, teased on 101 00:04:37,982 --> 00:04:40,362 the other end. I feel like that's what 102 00:04:40,362 --> 00:04:42,153 Dyslexia is all about. Whatever you do, 103 00:04:42,153 --> 00:04:45,729 you're just going to be teased. 104 00:04:45,729 --> 00:04:47,405 I wasn't supposed to graduate from high 105 00:04:47,405 --> 00:04:49,610 school, but I did. I did it in three years, 106 00:04:49,610 --> 00:04:51,361 so I got back on track and I went to 107 00:04:51,361 --> 00:04:55,663 college. I didn't want anyone to know 108 00:04:55,663 --> 00:04:57,332 about my Dyslexia in college. I didn't 109 00:04:57,332 --> 00:04:58,920 want the professors to know, I was 110 00:04:58,920 --> 00:05:02,260 embarrassed. I didn't want that letter of 111 00:05:02,260 --> 00:05:04,955 recommendation that said, "Oh, she's 112 00:05:04,955 --> 00:05:09,206 really good, for a Dyslexic person. " 113 00:05:09,206 --> 00:05:10,796 I wanted the letter that said, "She's 114 00:05:10,796 --> 00:05:14,990 really good." I thought, okay...I'm 115 00:05:14,990 --> 00:05:18,380 going to make mistakes on the test, I'm 116 00:05:18,380 --> 00:05:20,230 not going to get extra time, I won't have 117 00:05:20,230 --> 00:05:22,053 time to correct my mistakes, sometimes I 118 00:05:22,053 --> 00:05:23,982 won't have time to finish the test, but I 119 00:05:23,982 --> 00:05:26,222 am going to learn the material that much 120 00:05:26,222 --> 00:05:28,286 better than everyone else. So, if my 121 00:05:28,286 --> 00:05:31,850 Dyslexia costs me five points, I'll know 122 00:05:31,850 --> 00:05:34,404 five points more worth of material than 123 00:05:34,404 --> 00:05:36,744 everybody else. I'll just be better at it, 124 00:05:36,744 --> 00:05:38,520 I'll know it better, and that will allow 125 00:05:38,520 --> 00:05:40,750 me to compensate. You know, that worked 126 00:05:40,750 --> 00:05:43,000 actually, quite well. I went to Vassar 127 00:05:43,000 --> 00:05:44,958 College, it's a small school. The faculty 128 00:05:44,958 --> 00:05:47,145 get to know the students, they knew who 129 00:05:47,145 --> 00:05:49,194 knew the material. They knew who were 130 00:05:49,194 --> 00:05:51,083 cramming for the test and just trying to 131 00:05:51,083 --> 00:05:52,786 get a good grade, and they knew who was 132 00:05:52,786 --> 00:05:54,980 really interested in learning. This worked 133 00:05:54,980 --> 00:05:57,525 very well. I discovered that I loved 134 00:05:57,525 --> 00:05:59,432 science, I loved chemistry, I loved 135 00:05:59,432 --> 00:06:01,703 biology, and I want to be a teacher and 136 00:06:01,703 --> 00:06:04,595 professor. So...I want to go to grad 137 00:06:04,595 --> 00:06:07,958 school. But there is a problem going to 138 00:06:07,958 --> 00:06:10,437 grad school, and that is that there is a 139 00:06:10,437 --> 00:06:13,861 standardized test that was between me and 140 00:06:13,861 --> 00:06:19,280 my dreams. No matter how much better I 141 00:06:19,280 --> 00:06:21,280 felt like I'd learned those vocabulary 142 00:06:21,280 --> 00:06:25,551 words that no one will ever use...ever... 143 00:06:25,551 --> 00:06:28,958 I knew that I couldn't do as well. I needed 144 00:06:28,958 --> 00:06:32,474 more time, I couldn't compete on a 145 00:06:32,474 --> 00:06:35,173 standardized timed test like that. So I 146 00:06:35,173 --> 00:06:37,242 said, okay, I'm going to let people know 147 00:06:37,242 --> 00:06:39,916 I'm Dyslexic, and take the extra time. 148 00:06:40,446 --> 00:06:44,111 I'll never forget that day. I was in 149 00:06:44,111 --> 00:06:46,548 college, I had been working at a summer 150 00:06:46,548 --> 00:06:48,991 camp in the summers in the Pocono 151 00:06:48,991 --> 00:06:51,096 Mountains. I had found a local college 152 00:06:51,096 --> 00:06:53,607 that was offering these G.R.E. exams, 153 00:06:53,607 --> 00:06:55,669 and there was a professor paid extra 154 00:06:55,669 --> 00:06:58,324 money to proctor me. I was the only one 155 00:06:58,324 --> 00:06:59,884 with a disability, I was the only one in 156 00:06:59,884 --> 00:07:03,649 the room. I had the extra time. 157 00:07:03,649 --> 00:07:05,280 I remember he came in, and he was trying 158 00:07:05,280 --> 00:07:08,430 to be so nice to me. He said, "Cheer up. 159 00:07:08,430 --> 00:07:12,290 There's some university that might take 160 00:07:12,290 --> 00:07:16,827 you. You never know! It's possible." He's 161 00:07:16,827 --> 00:07:19,292 like, "You know, there are no statistics 162 00:07:19,292 --> 00:07:23,662 for people like you." And you know, I had 163 00:07:23,662 --> 00:07:25,683 been embarrassed by my Dyslexia, but I 164 00:07:25,683 --> 00:07:28,140 had never had really thought that it was 165 00:07:28,140 --> 00:07:30,974 like, people like ~me~. Somehow, this one 166 00:07:30,974 --> 00:07:33,858 thing about me just completely defined 167 00:07:33,858 --> 00:07:37,299 my entire existence, that I was Dyslexic, 168 00:07:37,299 --> 00:07:39,922 and that's all I was. I think...I don't 169 00:07:39,922 --> 00:07:42,164 know if I said anything to him...I'm sure 170 00:07:42,164 --> 00:07:44,540 I was polite, I'm always very polite. But 171 00:07:44,540 --> 00:07:48,086 I remember thinking at the time, someone 172 00:07:48,086 --> 00:07:49,530 will accept me, and it's going to be a 173 00:07:49,530 --> 00:07:54,018 really good school, and I'll show you. 174 00:07:54,018 --> 00:07:55,646 So, I did get into a good school. I went 175 00:07:55,646 --> 00:07:57,619 to the University of Michigan, and I had a 176 00:07:57,619 --> 00:07:59,564 wonderful adviser there, the late Martha 177 00:07:59,564 --> 00:08:03,071 Ludwig. She really took me under her wing 178 00:08:03,071 --> 00:08:04,917 and mentored me, and helped me reach my 179 00:08:04,917 --> 00:08:07,158 full ability. I was pushing...I was like, 180 00:08:07,158 --> 00:08:08,915 I want to do this, I don't want Dyslexia 181 00:08:08,915 --> 00:08:12,295 to define me. I want to keep going, not 182 00:08:12,295 --> 00:08:13,941 supposed to graduate from high school... 183 00:08:13,941 --> 00:08:15,668 HA, I'll go to college! HA, I'll go to grad 184 00:08:15,668 --> 00:08:18,641 school. I'm just going to keep going. But 185 00:08:18,641 --> 00:08:20,025 you know, I always felt like there was 186 00:08:20,025 --> 00:08:21,755 going to be this kind of "Dyslexia ceiling". 187 00:08:21,755 --> 00:08:24,222 It's like, okay...you got that far. You got 188 00:08:24,222 --> 00:08:26,280 into Grad school, but, eh...now you are 189 00:08:26,280 --> 00:08:28,735 done. I didn't have a lot of confidence 190 00:08:28,735 --> 00:08:31,452 and I had a really huge imposter syndrome 191 00:08:31,452 --> 00:08:32,828 going on, waiting for everyone to figure 192 00:08:32,828 --> 00:08:34,721 out I really didn't belong there. Somehow, 193 00:08:34,721 --> 00:08:36,521 I really shouldn't have even graduated from 194 00:08:36,521 --> 00:08:40,200 high school. But Martha saw in me 195 00:08:40,200 --> 00:08:42,973 tremendous potential. She mentored me, 196 00:08:42,973 --> 00:08:45,163 and with a collaborator, Rowena Matthews, 197 00:08:45,163 --> 00:08:46,720 I had these two female professors who 198 00:08:46,720 --> 00:08:49,960 really helped work with me, and gave me 199 00:08:49,960 --> 00:08:51,954 tremendous opportunities. Like the 200 00:08:51,954 --> 00:08:54,874 opportunity to talk about my research in 201 00:08:54,874 --> 00:08:57,465 an international meeting. At that meeting, 202 00:08:57,465 --> 00:08:59,352 there was another female professor in the 203 00:08:59,352 --> 00:09:01,240 audience, JoAnn Stubbe. And she saw me 204 00:09:01,240 --> 00:09:03,744 and said, "That's somebody we'd like to 205 00:09:03,744 --> 00:09:06,399 hire on the faculty at M.I.T." So, I didn't 206 00:09:06,399 --> 00:09:10,100 apply, because, what am I? Crazy? 207 00:09:10,100 --> 00:09:12,363 Professor at M.I.T.? No...that would not 208 00:09:12,363 --> 00:09:15,086 work out. I didn't apply, but I was 209 00:09:15,086 --> 00:09:17,521 recruited, invited to come and give a 210 00:09:17,521 --> 00:09:20,659 talk. Okay, I said, how fun is this? I'm 211 00:09:20,659 --> 00:09:23,929 talking at M.I.T.! And then they offered 212 00:09:23,929 --> 00:09:27,011 me a job, and my jaw hit the bottom. 213 00:09:27,011 --> 00:09:28,424 I was like, "What do you mean?" and they 214 00:09:28,424 --> 00:09:30,953 were like, you know, "We are offering 215 00:09:30,953 --> 00:09:32,375 you a position at M.I.T." So I took it, 216 00:09:32,375 --> 00:09:34,442 and I thought, "Okay, this is going to be 217 00:09:34,442 --> 00:09:35,890 really fun for a few years. I'm going to 218 00:09:35,890 --> 00:09:38,114 have the time of my life doing research, 219 00:09:38,114 --> 00:09:40,387 until they figure out what a crazy mistake 220 00:09:40,387 --> 00:09:43,617 they made and kick me out." But, somehow, 221 00:09:43,617 --> 00:09:46,134 I was able to fool them for a long enough 222 00:09:46,134 --> 00:09:48,104 to get tenure and then be promoted to a 223 00:09:48,104 --> 00:09:50,500 full professor, so they can't fire me now. 224 00:09:50,500 --> 00:09:53,617 They can figure it out...too late... tenure. 225 00:09:53,617 --> 00:09:56,194 Awesome thing! Really awesome. 226 00:09:56,194 --> 00:09:58,675 So, I was at M.I.T. with these really 227 00:09:58,675 --> 00:10:03,619 smart people. My research: I really think 228 00:10:03,619 --> 00:10:07,406 it was an advantage to be Dyslexic in some 229 00:10:07,406 --> 00:10:08,996 of the research I'm doing. 230 00:10:08,996 --> 00:10:10,485 I'm just going to tell you briefly about 231 00:10:10,485 --> 00:10:13,590 my research to see how Dyslexia, I think, 232 00:10:13,590 --> 00:10:16,004 was an advantage for me to be able to do 233 00:10:16,004 --> 00:10:19,602 well in this area. 234 00:10:19,602 --> 00:10:22,504 My research is about visualizing tiny 235 00:10:22,504 --> 00:10:25,553 molecules, like protein molecules. If you 236 00:10:25,553 --> 00:10:27,766 think about visualizing things--this is my 237 00:10:27,766 --> 00:10:30,585 daughter, Samantha. And if I want to 238 00:10:30,585 --> 00:10:33,384 visualize her moving around and doing a 239 00:10:33,384 --> 00:10:35,689 dance, I can take out my cell phone and 240 00:10:35,689 --> 00:10:38,927 take a picture of her. That's pretty easy. 241 00:10:38,927 --> 00:10:40,852 But inside my daughter, and inside all 242 00:10:40,852 --> 00:10:43,446 living creatures there are cells, and those 243 00:10:43,446 --> 00:10:46,220 cells are much smaller, but still, you can 244 00:10:46,220 --> 00:10:47,643 get a microscope. If you get a good 245 00:10:47,643 --> 00:10:49,913 quality microscope, you can visualize 246 00:10:49,913 --> 00:10:53,171 those cells moving around. But inside 247 00:10:53,171 --> 00:10:56,380 cells, there are proteins, or enzymes, that 248 00:10:56,380 --> 00:10:58,933 are carrying out the life functions of the 249 00:10:58,933 --> 00:11:02,256 cell. If you want to see those proteins, 250 00:11:02,256 --> 00:11:05,257 moving around, that's a lot harder. There 251 00:11:05,257 --> 00:11:07,883 isn't such a thing--like a microscope, and 252 00:11:07,883 --> 00:11:09,998 you have to use biophysical methods, one of 253 00:11:09,998 --> 00:11:13,278 which is X-ray crystallography, what I do. 254 00:11:13,278 --> 00:11:15,311 You need to get these images of these 255 00:11:15,311 --> 00:11:17,698 protein molecules moving by taking 256 00:11:17,698 --> 00:11:22,394 snapshots using this biophysical method. 257 00:11:22,394 --> 00:11:24,776 That is the research my lab does. We want 258 00:11:24,776 --> 00:11:27,450 to watch protein molecules shake, rattle, 259 00:11:27,450 --> 00:11:30,790 and roll and carry out their function. 260 00:11:30,790 --> 00:11:32,212 Let me just tell you a little bit about the 261 00:11:32,212 --> 00:11:34,764 technique of crystallography. Jenny 262 00:11:34,764 --> 00:11:38,087 Glusker compared crystallography to a 263 00:11:38,087 --> 00:11:40,997 light microscope. In a light microscope, 264 00:11:40,997 --> 00:11:44,312 you have visible light shining through your 265 00:11:44,312 --> 00:11:46,619 amoeba, planararian, whatever you are 266 00:11:46,619 --> 00:11:48,963 looking at. The light is diffracted, and 267 00:11:48,963 --> 00:11:51,610 there is a lens which can combine the 268 00:11:51,610 --> 00:11:53,502 diffracted light waves, and give you an 269 00:11:53,502 --> 00:11:56,145 enlarged image. If you want to look at 270 00:11:56,145 --> 00:11:58,600 something small like a protein molecule, 271 00:11:58,600 --> 00:12:00,302 you can't use visible light, you have to 272 00:12:00,302 --> 00:12:03,912 use x-rays. You can't just have one copy 273 00:12:03,912 --> 00:12:05,590 of your molecule, you need to have 274 00:12:05,590 --> 00:12:07,533 thousands of copies of your molecule 275 00:12:07,533 --> 00:12:10,146 lined up in a regularly repeating pattern 276 00:12:10,146 --> 00:12:12,692 or a crystal. So you shine x-rays through 277 00:12:12,692 --> 00:12:16,746 your crystal, the x-rays are diffracted, 278 00:12:16,746 --> 00:12:18,736 but now there is no such thing as a lens 279 00:12:18,736 --> 00:12:21,913 which can combine diffracted x-rays. 280 00:12:21,913 --> 00:12:24,191 The crystallographer and her computer need 281 00:12:24,191 --> 00:12:27,528 to do that. We collect data that tells us 282 00:12:27,528 --> 00:12:31,245 on a piece of film or a detector, tells us 283 00:12:31,245 --> 00:12:33,829 about those x-rays. You get a spot on the 284 00:12:33,829 --> 00:12:37,146 piece of film when the x-ray hits. Then, 285 00:12:37,146 --> 00:12:39,718 we have to mathematically combine the 286 00:12:39,718 --> 00:12:42,112 information about the waves, and you get 287 00:12:42,112 --> 00:12:45,187 what is known as an electron density map. 288 00:12:45,187 --> 00:12:47,650 This is a map in three dimensions that say 289 00:12:47,650 --> 00:12:49,665 electrons are here, which means your atoms 290 00:12:49,665 --> 00:12:52,320 are here. Into that, you have to put atoms 291 00:12:52,320 --> 00:12:56,574 to build the structure of your molecule. 292 00:12:56,574 --> 00:12:58,855 Proteins are made up of twenty different 293 00:12:58,855 --> 00:13:02,651 amino acids, and those are shown here. 294 00:13:02,651 --> 00:13:04,602 You know your protein has those amino 295 00:13:04,602 --> 00:13:06,479 acids, and you know the order of the amino 296 00:13:06,479 --> 00:13:08,663 acids in your protein, and then you get 297 00:13:08,663 --> 00:13:10,936 electron density that looks like this. 298 00:13:10,936 --> 00:13:13,889 This is one slice of electron density. 299 00:13:13,889 --> 00:13:16,755 You have to figure out which side chain 300 00:13:16,755 --> 00:13:22,582 goes in which piece of electron density. 301 00:13:22,582 --> 00:13:25,416 This is just the perfect technique for me 302 00:13:25,416 --> 00:13:28,170 because of the way I learned how to read. 303 00:13:28,170 --> 00:13:30,293 There was the shape of a word, and I 304 00:13:30,293 --> 00:13:33,295 figured what word went into that shape. 305 00:13:33,295 --> 00:13:35,283 This is the same thing, but it's infinitely 306 00:13:35,283 --> 00:13:38,115 easier, there's a lot of different words! 307 00:13:38,115 --> 00:13:41,744 There are only 20 amino-acids. This is not 308 00:13:41,744 --> 00:13:45,168 bad at all. There was a shape, and I just 309 00:13:45,168 --> 00:13:47,374 had to figure out what amino acid went 310 00:13:47,374 --> 00:13:49,577 into that shape, and build protein 311 00:13:49,577 --> 00:13:52,636 molecules. So here is a piece of electron 312 00:13:52,636 --> 00:13:54,988 density, here is the amino acid that fits 313 00:13:54,988 --> 00:13:57,734 in. Here is another piece of electron 314 00:13:57,734 --> 00:14:00,103 density, here is the maino acid that fits 315 00:14:00,103 --> 00:14:02,560 into that piece. There is only 20 316 00:14:02,560 --> 00:14:06,155 possibilities. This is not so bad. Now... 317 00:14:06,155 --> 00:14:07,738 these maps, you might say...that 318 00:14:07,738 --> 00:14:09,364 looks pretty straightforward, every one 319 00:14:09,364 --> 00:14:11,316 could probably do that. But this is really 320 00:14:11,316 --> 00:14:13,611 good quality data, and a lot of times what 321 00:14:13,611 --> 00:14:15,295 we get is not very good, and the maps 322 00:14:15,295 --> 00:14:18,065 don't look that good. But I am very good at 323 00:14:18,065 --> 00:14:19,939 recognizing patterns that other people 324 00:14:19,939 --> 00:14:22,533 don't see, and seeing things in that 325 00:14:22,533 --> 00:14:25,427 density that other people miss. Sometimes 326 00:14:25,427 --> 00:14:27,218 my students will be working on this part 327 00:14:27,218 --> 00:14:28,687 of the structure, and they are trying to 328 00:14:28,687 --> 00:14:30,496 build it ~this~ way, and build it ~that~ 329 00:14:30,496 --> 00:14:31,808 way, and they can't figure out what is 330 00:14:31,808 --> 00:14:33,368 going on and I walk by and go, "Oh, like 331 00:14:33,368 --> 00:14:35,773 that..." They try it and they look at me, 332 00:14:35,773 --> 00:14:37,770 and they are like, "How on earth did you 333 00:14:37,770 --> 00:14:40,678 see that?" It's because I have these years 334 00:14:40,678 --> 00:14:43,494 of experience looking at patterns. It's the 335 00:14:43,494 --> 00:14:46,380 way that I read, it's what I do. So I am 336 00:14:46,380 --> 00:14:49,356 able to see those shapes. Sometimes... 337 00:14:49,356 --> 00:14:51,220 we had a discovery early on that got me 338 00:14:51,220 --> 00:14:53,450 tenured at M.I.T., and I found out later 339 00:14:53,450 --> 00:14:55,726 that other people had been stuck. There 340 00:14:55,726 --> 00:14:57,775 was this one part of the protein, one 341 00:14:57,775 --> 00:14:59,298 part of the map, it was a very flexible 342 00:14:59,298 --> 00:15:02,839 region. The electron density was terrible. 343 00:15:02,839 --> 00:15:04,662 No one else could trace it. They couldn't 344 00:15:04,662 --> 00:15:06,439 finish solving the structure, they couldn't 345 00:15:06,439 --> 00:15:08,691 figure out what was going on. But I was 346 00:15:08,691 --> 00:15:10,054 able to do it. I did it myself early on in 347 00:15:10,054 --> 00:15:13,580 the lab, and I built it and it was right. 348 00:15:13,580 --> 00:15:15,421 We got the first structure, and we got the 349 00:15:15,421 --> 00:15:18,949 credit. I really do believe there are 350 00:15:18,949 --> 00:15:21,263 things that you see differently when you 351 00:15:21,263 --> 00:15:23,659 are Dyslexic that can be a huge advantage 352 00:15:23,659 --> 00:15:26,992 in certain areas. This "visualizing", this 353 00:15:26,992 --> 00:15:29,859 ability to see shapes and patterns 354 00:15:29,859 --> 00:15:33,582 definitely is true for me. 355 00:15:33,582 --> 00:15:37,536 What kind of advice can I give going out? 356 00:15:37,536 --> 00:15:41,270 I feel like one thing, "Don't listen to 357 00:15:41,270 --> 00:15:44,298 what anyone tells you , you can or can 358 00:15:44,298 --> 00:15:47,640 not do." --Not graduate from high school... 359 00:15:47,640 --> 00:15:49,815 I think that's maybe why I am a professor. 360 00:15:49,815 --> 00:15:51,691 I'm like..."I'm going to stay in school... 361 00:15:51,691 --> 00:15:57,700 FOREVER!" No one really knows what 362 00:15:57,700 --> 00:16:00,799 someone is capable of. Even that person 363 00:16:00,799 --> 00:16:03,030 doesn't know what they are capable of. 364 00:16:03,030 --> 00:16:04,892 The only way you figure out what you are 365 00:16:04,892 --> 00:16:07,464 capable of is to try it! You can't be 366 00:16:07,464 --> 00:16:11,134 afraid to fall on your face and fail. If 367 00:16:11,134 --> 00:16:12,655 you are doing anything that's important 368 00:16:12,655 --> 00:16:15,324 or significant, it's going to be hard! 369 00:16:15,324 --> 00:16:17,325 There is going to be failure. The key to 370 00:16:17,325 --> 00:16:20,062 success is just going, "Well, that didn't 371 00:16:20,062 --> 00:16:22,790 go well...Let's try that again!" You pick 372 00:16:22,790 --> 00:16:25,582 yourself up and you go right back at it. 373 00:16:25,582 --> 00:16:28,341 If you do that, and you just do what you 374 00:16:28,341 --> 00:16:30,346 love to do, and find things that are cool 375 00:16:30,346 --> 00:16:33,308 and interesting and fun. And only work 376 00:16:33,308 --> 00:16:35,982 for nice people. Life is hard enough. You 377 00:16:35,982 --> 00:16:38,020 really don't want to work for people who 378 00:16:38,020 --> 00:16:40,253 are not nice. Get yourself a group of 379 00:16:40,253 --> 00:16:42,420 people that you really like that you can 380 00:16:42,420 --> 00:16:45,389 support each other...People who will have 381 00:16:45,389 --> 00:16:48,085 your back. If you don't have that support 382 00:16:48,085 --> 00:16:51,144 group, look for it. You know, I could work 383 00:16:51,144 --> 00:16:52,696 for a lot of different people, but I 384 00:16:52,696 --> 00:16:54,365 picked someone that I knew would be a good 385 00:16:54,365 --> 00:16:57,494 mentor toward me. That was really key. If 386 00:16:57,494 --> 00:16:59,122 you have nice people surrounding, and you 387 00:16:59,122 --> 00:17:03,339 just go for it...it's amazing. There is no 388 00:17:03,339 --> 00:17:05,950 Dyslexia ceiling, it doesn't exist unless 389 00:17:05,950 --> 00:17:08,079 you create it in your own mind. 390 00:17:08,079 --> 00:17:10,813 Thank you very much.