[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:00.04,0:00:05.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I didn't know when I agreed to do this,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:05.20,0:00:10.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,whether I was expected to talk, or to sing.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:10.74,0:00:15.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But when I was told that the topic was language,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:15.86,0:00:20.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I felt that I had to speak about something for a moment.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:20.63,0:00:25.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I have a problem.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:25.05,0:00:26.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's not the worst thing in the world,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:26.84,0:00:28.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm fine,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:28.08,0:00:29.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not on fire,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:29.89,0:00:31.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I know that other people in the world
Dialogue: 0,0:00:31.74,0:00:36.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,have far worst things to deal with,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:36.12,0:00:41.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but for me, language and music are
Dialogue: 0,0:00:41.77,0:00:46.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,inextricably linked through this one thing.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:46.46,0:00:54.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And the thing, is that, I have a stutter.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:54.06,0:01:00.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It might seem curious given that I spend a lot of my life on the stage.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:00.32,0:01:03.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,One would assume that i'm comfortable
Dialogue: 0,0:01:03.08,0:01:08.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in the public's fear and comfortable here, speaking to you guys.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:08.36,0:01:13.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But the truth is that I've spent my life up on to this point
Dialogue: 0,0:01:13.07,0:01:20.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and including this point, living in mortal dread of public speaking.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:20.68,0:01:22.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Public 'singing',
Dialogue: 0,0:01:22.68,0:01:23.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,whole different thing.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:23.65,0:01:25.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Chuckles]
Dialogue: 0,0:01:25.72,0:01:28.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But we'll get to that in a moment.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:28.98,0:01:34.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I've never really talked about it before so explicitly.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:34.90,0:01:37.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think that that's because I've always lived in hope
Dialogue: 0,0:01:37.32,0:01:40.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that when I was a grown-up,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:40.01,0:01:45.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I wouldn't have one.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:45.63,0:01:49.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I sort of lived with this idea that when i'm grown,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:49.56,0:01:52.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'd learn to speak French,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:52.91,0:01:55.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and when i'm grown, i'll learn how to manage my money,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:55.78,0:01:57.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and when i'm grown, I won't have a stutter,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:57.92,0:02:00.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and i'll be able to public speak and maybe be the Prime Minister
Dialogue: 0,0:02:00.40,0:02:02.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and anything's possible and, you know.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:02.30,0:02:07.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Chuckles]
Dialogue: 0,0:02:07.09,0:02:10.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I can talk about it now,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:10.14,0:02:17.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because I've reached this point, where, I mean, i'm 28.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:17.87,0:02:20.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm pretty sure that i'm grown now.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:20.49,0:02:22.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Chuckles]
Dialogue: 0,0:02:22.36,0:02:24.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And i'm an adult woman,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:24.36,0:02:28.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who spends her life as a performer,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:28.34,0:02:31.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with a speech impediment.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:31.10,0:02:35.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, I might as well come clean about it.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:35.46,0:02:39.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There are some interesting angles to having a stutter.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:39.29,0:02:42.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,For me, the worst thing that can happen
Dialogue: 0,0:02:42.68,0:02:45.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is meeting another stutterer.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:45.93,0:02:49.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Laughter]
Dialogue: 0,0:02:49.22,0:02:52.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This happened to me in Hamburg, when
Dialogue: 0,0:02:52.53,0:02:54.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this guy, we met and he said,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:54.52,0:02:58.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Hello, m..m..m..my name is Joe",
Dialogue: 0,0:02:58.19,0:02:58.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I said,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:58.62,0:03:02.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Hello, m..m..m..my name is Mey".
Dialogue: 0,0:03:02.19,0:03:03.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Imagine my horror when I realized
Dialogue: 0,0:03:03.83,0:03:06.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he thought that I was making fun of him.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:06.59,0:03:12.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Laughter]
Dialogue: 0,0:03:12.83,0:03:17.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,People think i'm drunk. All the time.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:17.39,0:03:21.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Laughter]
Dialogue: 0,0:03:21.25,0:03:29.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,People think that I've forgotten their name, when I hesitate before saying it.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:29.42,0:03:31.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And it is a very weird thing, because
Dialogue: 0,0:03:31.66,0:03:36.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,proper nouns are the worst.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:36.06,0:03:39.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If i'm gonna use the word, 'Wednesday', in a sentence,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:39.92,0:03:42.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and i'm coming up to the word,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:42.59,0:03:45.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I can feel that i'm gonna stutter or something,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:45.63,0:03:50.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I can change the word, to 'tomorrow', or 'the day after Tuesday',
Dialogue: 0,0:03:50.99,0:03:55.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or something else, you know, it's clunky,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:55.05,0:03:58.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but you can get away with it.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:58.47,0:04:05.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because over time, I've developed this loophole method of using speech
Dialogue: 0,0:04:05.64,0:04:12.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,where right at the last minute you change the thing and you trick your brain.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:12.52,0:04:15.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But with peoples' names, you can't change them.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:15.92,0:04:19.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Chuckles]
Dialogue: 0,0:04:19.36,0:04:22.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When I was singing a lot of jazz,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:22.43,0:04:27.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I worked a lot with a pianist whose name was Steve.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:27.92,0:04:33.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,As you can probably gather, 'S's and 'T's together, or independently,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:33.47,0:04:36.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,are like Kryptonite.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:36.12,0:04:38.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Chuckles]
Dialogue: 0,0:04:38.08,0:04:39.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I would have to introduce the band
Dialogue: 0,0:04:39.93,0:04:43.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,over this rolling vamp, you know,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:43.49,0:04:46.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and when I got around to Steve,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:46.06,0:04:51.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'd often find myself stuck on the 'St'.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:51.80,0:04:57.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And it was a bit awkward and uncomfortable and it totally kills the vibe, you know.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:57.53,0:04:59.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So after a few instances of this,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:59.75,0:05:04.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Steve happily became 'Seve'.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:04.12,0:05:05.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Laughter]
Dialogue: 0,0:05:05.78,0:05:10.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And we got through it that way.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:10.83,0:05:12.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I've had a lot of therapy,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:12.70,0:05:19.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and a common form of treatment is to use this technique that's called , 'Smooth Speech',
Dialogue: 0,0:05:19.88,0:05:25.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which is where you almost sing everything that you say.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:25.49,0:05:32.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You kind of join everything together in this very sing-song, kindergarten teacher sort of way,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:32.12,0:05:35.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and it makes you sound very serene, like you've had lots of valium,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:35.35,0:05:36.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Laughter]
Dialogue: 0,0:05:36.01,0:05:39.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and everything is calm.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:39.82,0:05:42.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's not actually me, you know.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:42.92,0:05:51.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I do, I do use that, I use it when I have to be on panel shows,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:51.81,0:05:56.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or when I have to do radio interviews,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:56.26,0:06:00.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when the economy of airtime is Paramount.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:00.77,0:06:04.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Laughter]
Dialogue: 0,0:06:04.26,0:06:08.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I get through it that way, you know, for my job.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:08.79,0:06:11.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But as an artist who feels that their work
Dialogue: 0,0:06:11.36,0:06:17.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is based solely on a platform of honesty,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:17.67,0:06:21.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and being real,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:21.43,0:06:25.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that feels often like cheating.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:25.45,0:06:32.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Which is why before I sing, I wanted to tell you what singing means to me.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:32.06,0:06:36.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's more than making nice sounds,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:36.08,0:06:41.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and it's more than making nice song,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:41.52,0:06:47.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's more than feeling known, or understood.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:47.01,0:06:53.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's more than making you feel the things that I feel.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:53.23,0:06:55.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's not about mythology,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:55.92,0:07:00.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or mythologizing myself to you.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:00.98,0:07:10.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Somehow, through some miraculous synaptic function of the human brain,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:10.78,0:07:16.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's impossible to stutter when you sing.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:16.56,0:07:20.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And when I was younger, that was a method of treatment
Dialogue: 0,0:07:20.12,0:07:22.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that worked very well for me.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:22.47,0:07:24.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Singing.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:24.79,0:07:26.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I did it a lot.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:26.27,0:07:28.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Chuckles]
Dialogue: 0,0:07:28.16,0:07:31.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And that's why i'm here, today.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:31.99,0:07:42.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Applause]
Dialogue: 0,0:07:42.46,0:07:47.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Singing for me is sweet relief.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:47.13,0:07:55.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It is the only time when I feel fluent.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:55.64,0:07:59.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It is the only time when what comes out of my mouth
Dialogue: 0,0:07:59.48,0:08:01.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is comprehensively exactly what I intended.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:01.45,0:08:04.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Chuckles]
Dialogue: 0,0:08:04.14,0:08:10.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I know that this is a TED talk, but now i'm going to TED sing.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:10.95,0:08:12.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is a song that I wrote last year.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:12.54,0:08:13.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thank you very much.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:13.96,0:08:14.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thank you.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:14.97,0:08:27.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Applause]
Dialogue: 0,0:08:27.72,0:08:43.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Piano]
Dialogue: 0,0:08:43.20,0:08:47.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I would be a beauty
Dialogue: 0,0:08:47.05,0:08:50.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but my nose
Dialogue: 0,0:08:50.47,0:08:54.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is slightly too big
Dialogue: 0,0:08:54.23,0:08:57.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for my face
Dialogue: 0,0:08:57.75,0:09:01.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I would be a dreamer
Dialogue: 0,0:09:01.71,0:09:05.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but my dream
Dialogue: 0,0:09:05.18,0:09:08.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is slightly too big
Dialogue: 0,0:09:08.66,0:09:12.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for this space
Dialogue: 0,0:09:12.27,0:09:16.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I would be an angel
Dialogue: 0,0:09:16.44,0:09:19.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but my halo
Dialogue: 0,0:09:19.45,0:09:23.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,impales in the glow
Dialogue: 0,0:09:23.34,0:09:26.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of your grace
Dialogue: 0,0:09:26.90,0:09:30.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I would be a joker
Dialogue: 0,0:09:30.76,0:09:39.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but that could look silly when you play
Dialogue: 0,0:09:39.36,0:09:43.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,your ace
Dialogue: 0,0:09:43.17,0:09:56.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Piano]
Dialogue: 0,0:09:56.11,0:10:00.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I'd like to know,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:00.10,0:10:03.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Are there stars in hell?
Dialogue: 0,0:10:03.84,0:10:07.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I'd like to know,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:07.51,0:10:10.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,know if you can tell
Dialogue: 0,0:10:10.94,0:10:18.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that you make me lose everything I know
Dialogue: 0,0:10:18.02,0:10:24.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That I cannot choose to or not let go
Dialogue: 0,0:10:24.58,0:10:38.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Piano]
Dialogue: 0,0:10:38.50,0:10:42.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I'd stay forever
Dialogue: 0,0:10:42.64,0:10:46.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but my home
Dialogue: 0,0:10:46.02,0:10:49.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is slightly too far
Dialogue: 0,0:10:49.40,0:10:52.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,from this place
Dialogue: 0,0:10:52.61,0:10:56.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I swear I tried to
Dialogue: 0,0:10:56.77,0:11:00.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,slow it down
Dialogue: 0,0:11:00.38,0:11:07.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when I'm walking at your pace
Dialogue: 0,0:11:07.41,0:11:09.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But all I could think
Dialogue: 0,0:11:09.17,0:11:14.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Is land through the cities,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:14.62,0:11:21.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Do I look pretty in the rain?
Dialogue: 0,0:11:21.86,0:11:25.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I don't know how someone
Dialogue: 0,0:11:25.68,0:11:29.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,quite so lovely
Dialogue: 0,0:11:29.30,0:11:34.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,makes me feel ugly
Dialogue: 0,0:11:34.66,0:11:37.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So much shame
Dialogue: 0,0:11:37.46,0:11:44.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Piano]
Dialogue: 0,0:11:44.15,0:11:47.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And i'd like to know,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:47.84,0:11:51.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Are there stars in hell?
Dialogue: 0,0:11:51.42,0:11:55.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And i'd like to know,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:55.05,0:12:06.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,know if you can tell that you make me lose everything I know
Dialogue: 0,0:12:06.35,0:12:12.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that I cannot choose to or not let go