I keep looking at it, I have to go back and start working again.
What I'm looking for is resolution. I have it one day and I don't have it the next day.
That's why being an artist is so great because you can get that kind of satisfaction.
The thing that has been hard about these paintings, is that I don't know how I'm gonna get them resolved.
I thought, when I did the drawings for this painting, I was very excited.
They looked really great to me. And then I blew it up,
And the guys who make these forms for me put it together, made it, and it came back into the studio.
And, you know, the minute I saw it, I just didn't see how it was gonna go together at all.
Even before I touched it. Just the way the forms were working.
"What was I thinking of! This is gonna be horrible."
And it was really, really a long journey with this painting.
The colors I thought I thought I was going to use, none of them worked in the beginning.
But that's nothing new.
The whole painting was painful.
Usually, what happens is when I start to really hate it, it starts to go someplace.
It's almost as though you have to get down into that place where
You absolutely hate it and want to rip it off the wall and throw it out,
To start getting into it. It's very strange.
For instance, that particular blue-pie shape with the spinal column going through it,
I wanted something through the center, it needed something in the middle,
That was going off-center in the form. I had a zig-zaggy line for a while.
For a while, I liked it, and then I came in one day, and I said, "No."
The spinal column ended up being a kind of way to get through the shape into the next shape.
The resolution has to happen without anybody seeing it, not even me.
But I know that it's there. I feel that it's there.
There's a moment when I start to feel it with this painting. And I don't think I can describe it
But I feel that with it because I can stop it.
When I look at it, instead of being this battle, this conflict that I have to pull together,
I can look at it peacefully.
[Man] Lift for the blocks. Come on Steve, put the block man.
[Man] No, not on the chicken head.
When it feels right, it is such a natural thing, when you realize that something really is completed.