Good Morning
Worldwide, over 1.5 billion people experience un conflict
In response, people are forced to flee their country.
leaving over 15 million refugees.
children without a doubt are
the most innocent and vulnerable victims
but not just from the obvious physical dangers,
but from, the often, unspoken affects that wars have on their families.
The experiences of war leave children at real high risk
for the development of emotional and behavioural problems.
children as we can only imagine,
will feel worried, threaten and at risk.
but there is good news.
The Quality of care that children recieve
in their families, can have a more significant effects
on their well-being, than from
the actual experiences of war that they have been exposed to.
So actually, children can be protected
by warm, secure parenting.
during and after conflict.
In 2011, I was a first year PHD Student
in the University Of Manchester
School Of Physiological Sciences.
Like many of you here, I watched the crisis in Syria
unfold in front of me on the Tv.
My family are originally from Syria, and very early on
I lost several family members in really horrifying ways.
I sit and I gathered with my family and watched the TV.
So we have all seen those scenes,
bombs destroying, buildings, chaos, destruction.
and people screaming and running.
it was always the people screaming and running
that really got me the most.
Specially those terrified looking children.
I was a mother to two young, typically inquisitive children.
They were five and six then.
At an age when they typically ask lots and lots of questions
and expect real convincing answers.
So I began to wonder what it might be like
to parent my children in a war-zone and a refugee camp.
Would my children change?
Would my daughter's bright happy eyes lose their shine?
Would my sons' really relax care-free nature
become fearful and withdrawn?
How would I cope?
Would I change?
As psychologists and parent's trainers
we know that arming parents
with skills and caring for their children
can have a huge effect on their well-being.
We call this parents training.
So the questions I had
was could Parent Training programs be useful for families
while they're still in war-zones or refugee camps?
Could we reach them with advise or training
that would help them through the struggles?
So, I approached my PHD supervisor,
professor Rachel Calam,
with the idea of using my academic skills
to make some changes in the real world.
I wasn't quite sure, exactly, what I wanted to do.
She listened carefully and patiently,
And to my joy, she said:
"If that is what you want to do,
and it means so much to you, then let's do it.
Let's find ways to see if parent programs can be useful
for families in this contexts."
So for the past five years myself and my colleagues,
professor Calam and Dr. Kim Cartwright
have been working on ways to support families
that have experienced war and displacement.
Now, to know how to help families that have been
through conflict, support their children,
the first step must obviously be
to ask them what are they struggling with. Right?
I mean, it seems obvious,
but often those are the most vulnerable
that we are trying to support that we actually don't ask.
How many times have we just assumed
we know exactly the right thing that is gonna help someone or something
without actually asking them first.
So i travelled to the refugee camps in Syria and in Turkey.
And i sat with families and i listened.
I listened to the parenting challenges
I listened to the parenting struggles
And I listened to their call for help
And sometimes that was just bored is all I could do
and destroy them and silence crying and prayer
So they told me about their struggles
They told me about the ruffle, harsh refugee camp condition
That makes it hard forcusing on anything but practical choses
like connecting team water
He told me how they watch their children draw
the sadness, depression, anger bed-wetting, thumb sucking
fear of loud noisy, fear of nightmares terrify terrify nightmares
what we had been watching on TV
the mothers almost had
describe how they coping so badly
They watch their children change and
they have had no idea how to help them.
They didn't know how to answer
their children questions.
this family was so motivated to support their children
to spice all the challenges they face
they'll try to help their children
they will making attempt that they can support from