[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:00.00,0:00:02.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- What's up, AmazingPhil dusties?\N- Hello,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:02.49,0:00:04.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- We're on Phil's channel.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:04.26,0:00:06.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- What the hell is going on?\NWhat's going on? Why are we here?
Dialogue: 0,0:00:06.29,0:00:09.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Feels like one of those times\Nwhere Phil wants to just post something,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:09.89,0:00:12.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'cause he's, you know, too much time\Nhas passed, he has no ideas.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:12.94,0:00:14.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- No!\N- What's the title of this one gonna be?
Dialogue: 0,0:00:14.72,0:00:16.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"We're Dead Forever,"
Dialogue: 0,0:00:16.69,0:00:17.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- We're, we're... (laughs)\N- "He's Leaving Me".
Dialogue: 0,0:00:17.73,0:00:19.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- "We're Leaving-"...\N- "I Died Again".
Dialogue: 0,0:00:19.23,0:00:20.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- "... Trying to Survive Out Here".\N- And I don't know what's going on,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:20.87,0:00:23.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,why are we sat here, dressed like\Nstrange 90s cultists?
Dialogue: 0,0:00:23.41,0:00:25.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- We're in a dressing room\Nin a basement,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:25.59,0:00:26.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the phasement,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:26.34,0:00:28.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and we are rehearsing our tour.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:28.58,0:00:30.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- AKA, our life for the next six months.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:30.51,0:00:32.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- We're about to leave...\N- On tour.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:32.31,0:00:35.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- On tour, and I thought we could\Ndo a kind of farewell Q&A.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:35.17,0:00:36.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- A temporary farewell,\N- Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:36.83,0:00:38.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- we're not disappearing forever.\N- No.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:38.79,0:00:41.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Sorry, just post-hiatus, I felt like\Nwe needed to clarify that
Dialogue: 0,0:00:41.84,0:00:43.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because people still have PTSD\Nfrom their dads disappearing
Dialogue: 0,0:00:43.31,0:00:44.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to get the milk.\N- This is not a hiatus.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:44.65,0:00:46.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We're gonna try and game\Non the gaming channel
Dialogue: 0,0:00:46.60,0:00:48.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I might poke my nose\Nin here for a bit,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:48.51,0:00:49.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Just to say hi, you know.\N- Just to say hi.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:49.82,0:00:51.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- We're gonna answer\Nsome questions about life,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:51.59,0:00:53.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and also about tour.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:53.38,0:00:54.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Lore.\N- Lore!
Dialogue: 0,0:00:54.30,0:00:57.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- If anyone says "piss," I'm just,\N- No, we're just gonna switch it off,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:57.37,0:00:58.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I'm leaving, Phil's gonna film this\Nby himself, answer his own questions.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:58.84,0:01:01.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- "Did you know about the\NJapan conspiracy?"
Dialogue: 0,0:01:01.21,0:01:02.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What the (bark) does that mean?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:02.37,0:01:04.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Is that the one that we\Ngot married in Japan?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:04.15,0:01:07.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because we might be\Naddressing that at the tour.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:07.16,0:01:10.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Let's just say, this tour,\N- Hide your, hide your hand,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:10.53,0:01:11.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,they might see it.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:11.43,0:01:12.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They might see what's\Non your finger.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:12.83,0:01:14.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- What, the lack of wedding ring?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:14.43,0:01:15.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ok, yeah.\N- The phwedding phring.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:15.96,0:01:19.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- This tour is all about establishing\Nwhat the heck this comeback
Dialogue: 0,0:01:19.25,0:01:20.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,new era of Dan and Phil is.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:20.97,0:01:22.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's about the future,\N- Comeback.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:22.37,0:01:24.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- and also confronting\Na bit of the past.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:24.33,0:01:27.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So if you're sensitive to\Ntea being spilled, then
Dialogue: 0,0:01:27.31,0:01:28.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,holy shit, strap yourselves in.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:28.79,0:01:31.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- This camera's kind of giving you\Na cute little anime blush
Dialogue: 0,0:01:31.25,0:01:32.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and a monocle.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:32.08,0:01:34.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Dan laughs)\NLook at that little, little blush!
Dialogue: 0,0:01:34.33,0:01:35.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And a monocle!
Dialogue: 0,0:01:35.85,0:01:37.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- (Dan, in goofy accent)\NMm, very well, good sir,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:37.58,0:01:39.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,dip, dip, dippity in the morning.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:39.27,0:01:40.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- "How many pillows do you sleep with?"
Dialogue: 0,0:01:40.88,0:01:41.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Two.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:41.40,0:01:43.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I've got a problem with the\Npillow inventor, right?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:43.45,0:01:45.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They're either too thin or too thick.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:45.83,0:01:48.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Oh my god, that is so right.\N- We just need one that is,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:48.52,0:01:50.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,1.5 thickness.\N- You need to put your head on a pillow
Dialogue: 0,0:01:50.09,0:01:51.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and it either goes "bam!"\Nto the bottom
Dialogue: 0,0:01:51.92,0:01:54.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or you put it on and it's like\Nthis big and it's like (choking noise).
Dialogue: 0,0:01:54.66,0:01:57.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- So why aren't we just making\N1.5 thickness pillows?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:57.07,0:01:58.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It would save my neck\Nand my crack.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:58.84,0:02:00.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Do you know sometimes \NI get a TikTok of a guy that's like,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:00.36,0:02:02.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"This is the worst way you could\Npossibly sleep,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:02.50,0:02:04.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"you're killing yourself."\N- And you're like, "oh my God, that's me!"
Dialogue: 0,0:02:04.36,0:02:05.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- It's just me.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:05.09,0:02:07.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm like, on my front, twisted,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:07.44,0:02:08.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,cuddling a pillow.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:08.76,0:02:10.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- They're like, "this is terrible\Nfor your spine,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:10.58,0:02:12.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"it restricts your airflow,\N- Good.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:12.16,0:02:13.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"your intelligence dwindles\Nevery single day,"
Dialogue: 0,0:02:13.61,0:02:16.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and yeah, I'm too busy\N{\i1}snort mimimi{\i0}ing to listen to you, nerd.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:16.10,0:02:18.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yeah, tell me, Winston,\Nwhy is it so comfy?
Dialogue: 0,0:02:18.51,0:02:19.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If nature doesn't want it?
Dialogue: 0,0:02:19.92,0:02:22.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Speaking of comfy,\N"boxers, briefs, or boxer-briefs?"
Dialogue: 0,0:02:22.34,0:02:23.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Fight.\N- Oh, there's some here.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:23.88,0:02:26.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What are these nude-colored\Nbriefs for, Dan?
Dialogue: 0,0:02:26.38,0:02:28.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- You don't wanna know why\Nthat's part of the show.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:28.08,0:02:30.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- What have you got these for?\N- (Dan singing) You don't wanna know,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:30.24,0:02:31.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but you are gonna see.\N- Ooh.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:31.97,0:02:33.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm in a boxer-brief time.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:33.39,0:02:35.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Boxers, too flappy,\Nbriefs, too squashy.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:35.87,0:02:36.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Too constricting.\N- Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:36.86,0:02:39.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- "How different does this tour\Nfeel from your others?"
Dialogue: 0,0:02:39.08,0:02:41.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yo, I mean, look, a lot of time's passed.\N- It's...
Dialogue: 0,0:02:41.44,0:02:42.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- It ain't 2015 anymore.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:42.56,0:02:44.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I haven't been on tour in like 7 years,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:44.38,0:02:45.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so I'd say it's gayer.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:45.73,0:02:48.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- How have you and culture\Nchanged since 2018?
Dialogue: 0,0:02:48.02,0:02:49.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yes.\N- Yeah, yeah.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:49.36,0:02:51.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- It represents what our\Nchannel is like now,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:51.36,0:02:52.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I would say.\N- What-, that's a red flag.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:52.69,0:02:54.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yes, I know.\N- Don't say that.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:54.07,0:02:56.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I don't know.\N- It's kind of a best of everything,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:56.09,0:02:57.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I would say.\N- Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:57.00,0:03:00.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- It's got like the theatrical\Nextraness of TATINOF.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:00.41,0:03:02.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yes.\N- It has some of the aesthetic
Dialogue: 0,0:03:02.23,0:03:04.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and interactive fun\Nof [Interactive] Introverts.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:04.58,0:03:06.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yes.\N- And it has some of the tone
Dialogue: 0,0:03:06.38,0:03:08.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and homosexuality of\N[We're All] Doomed,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:08.06,0:03:09.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which is great, it's like\Nthe ultimate meld.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:09.91,0:03:12.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- They've all banged and made this baby.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:12.02,0:03:13.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yeah, the Voltron of influence.\N- Ooh.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:13.82,0:03:16.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Also, I feel a lot more confident\Nin myself,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:16.62,0:03:19.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so I feel like on stage I'm gonna be\Na bit less like a frightened rabbit
Dialogue: 0,0:03:19.66,0:03:21.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and more like a cougar.\N- Yeah. (record scratch)
Dialogue: 0,0:03:21.72,0:03:23.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- No, not a cougar,\NI'm not a, don't worry.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:23.51,0:03:25.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Phil's saying that he\Nis an available MILF,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:25.86,0:03:28.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and if you're a desperate lesbian\Nin the audience,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:28.08,0:03:29.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he's coming for you.\N- Oh yeah.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:29.69,0:03:31.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hey, we've got one here.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:31.41,0:03:33.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What is your fave... browser?
Dialogue: 0,0:03:33.85,0:03:35.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I can't believe someone\Nasked that, Phil,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:35.36,0:03:36.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I just, I just, it's wild.\N- Alright.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:36.16,0:03:40.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Oh hello, it's the Browser Fairy here,\Nto let you know
Dialogue: 0,0:03:40.77,0:03:42.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that thanks to the sponsor\Nof today's video,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:42.87,0:03:44.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Opera Browser,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:44.16,0:03:46.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you could be having a much more\Nrelaxing browsing experience
Dialogue: 0,0:03:46.94,0:03:48.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,if you just took the plunge
Dialogue: 0,0:03:48.32,0:03:50.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and cheated on the browser\Nyou're using right now.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:50.46,0:03:51.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's like the feeling of\Ngoing to your friend's house
Dialogue: 0,0:03:51.96,0:03:53.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when you think you're gonna be able\Nto play with one of these
Dialogue: 0,0:03:53.98,0:03:55.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and they hand you this.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:55.26,0:03:58.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,As a chaotic squirrel-brained person,\NI am enjoying the workspace feature
Dialogue: 0,0:03:58.40,0:04:00.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,where you can click between a whole\Nworkspace in an instance.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:00.70,0:04:03.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I've got my tour one, where I'm\Nworking on my tour stuff,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:03.25,0:04:05.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then my other one where I'm\Ndoing my actual work,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:05.35,0:04:06.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,meerkat research.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:06.56,0:04:08.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There is also a Lucid tool.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:08.20,0:04:10.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Let's look at this ancient\NPhil video, right?
Dialogue: 0,0:04:10.49,0:04:12.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Wilhelm scream)\NLook how blurry he is.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:12.19,0:04:14.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not anymore, look,\Nand you can slide it.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:14.31,0:04:17.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I just could spend hours sliding\Nthis Lucid bar back and forth.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:17.96,0:04:20.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Also handy, is your laptop\Ndying throughout the day?
Dialogue: 0,0:04:20.20,0:04:21.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, click on battery saver mode.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:21.88,0:04:23.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It could give you a whole\Nextra chunk of time.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:23.59,0:04:27.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So if this is making you feel like,\N"ooh, Phil, I might actually
Dialogue: 0,0:04:27.59,0:04:29.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"head over to the Opera Browser\Nside of life,"
Dialogue: 0,0:04:29.66,0:04:31.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you can click the link below.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:31.55,0:04:32.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Just give it a go,\Nit's completely free.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:32.67,0:04:35.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Upgrade your browsing life and\Nfeel like this guy
Dialogue: 0,0:04:35.11,0:04:37.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,every day.\N(Otamatone sings)
Dialogue: 0,0:04:37.40,0:04:39.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We know you are\Nsluts for Deliveroo,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:39.24,0:04:41.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but what is the last meal\Nyou actually cooked?
Dialogue: 0,0:04:41.39,0:04:44.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Uh, peanut butter on toast.\N- No, I made a spaghetti bolognese
Dialogue: 0,0:04:44.06,0:04:45.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for you.\N- You did,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:45.64,0:04:47.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- You were ill, and I cooked,\N- you did.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:47.59,0:04:49.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- and got an onion.\N- And I was like, "this is so lovely,"
Dialogue: 0,0:04:49.47,0:04:50.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I can't taste.\N- It was a waste of time.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:50.95,0:04:53.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- So this is the one time\Nyou've cooked in like a year,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:53.09,0:04:54.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yeah.\N- and you gave it to the guy
Dialogue: 0,0:04:54.35,0:04:55.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that has a blocked sinus.\N- I did.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:55.92,0:04:57.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- But the thought was there.\N- It was.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:57.33,0:04:57.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Thanks.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:57.77,0:04:59.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Will Phil let anyone\Nshower on the bus this time?"
Dialogue: 0,0:04:59.72,0:05:00.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- No.\N- No.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:00.51,0:05:02.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I've been in deep dives,\N- Don't set Phil off on his
Dialogue: 0,0:05:02.51,0:05:04.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,water conspiracy.\N- about microbes.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:04.06,0:05:05.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You can't leave water\Nanywhere in the sun without...
Dialogue: 0,0:05:05.81,0:05:07.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- You leave a tap water glass\N- ...beasts.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:07.84,0:05:09.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- out for three minutes, death.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:09.55,0:05:11.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You shower in the theatre.\N- We do.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:11.08,0:05:14.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- You come to a dank basement,\Nwhere like, the chorus line
Dialogue: 0,0:05:14.92,0:05:18.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of Hamilton have just been scrubbing\Ntheir feet for 20 minutes
Dialogue: 0,0:05:18.20,0:05:19.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yes.\N- and then you're like "hell yeah".
Dialogue: 0,0:05:19.40,0:05:21.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- It's communal and there's a lot\Nof crew to shower.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:21.36,0:05:23.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- If you think it's a glamorous life\N- No.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:23.46,0:05:24.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- being backstage\Nin all these theaters,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:24.84,0:05:26.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,they spend all their money\Non the front end
Dialogue: 0,0:05:26.50,0:05:28.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then their back end \Nis a decrepit mess,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:28.00,0:05:29.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,am I right, brother?\N- It's, it's correct.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:29.97,0:05:33.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- "I'm using [the] Terrible Influence\NTour as a lesbian dating event."
Dialogue: 0,0:05:33.79,0:05:34.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, yeah.\N- Do you know what,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:34.67,0:05:37.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this is probably one of the\Nbest times to find a mate.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:37.10,0:05:39.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,A mate? Why, why-\N(Dan laughs)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:39.24,0:05:41.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Are you also a cougar?\N- Are you a cougar?
Dialogue: 0,0:05:41.10,0:05:44.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Are you a young cub on the prowl\Nlooking for a hot MILF-ette?
Dialogue: 0,0:05:44.32,0:05:46.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Just say hi to the person\Nsat next to you,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:46.44,0:05:48.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,get their Instagram,\Nyou never know.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:48.19,0:05:51.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- What you need to do is go,\N"hi, bye, IG?"
Dialogue: 0,0:05:51.37,0:05:55.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I me.\N- You...
Dialogue: 0,0:05:55.07,0:05:56.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Phil claps)\N- Or just hold hands.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:56.80,0:05:59.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Or go into a little chocolate shop.\N- Or like, asexual, let's just binge
Dialogue: 0,0:05:59.66,0:06:01.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Netlix and talk about how\Nmuch we hate people.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:01.38,0:06:05.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Explain the tour in 4 words," go.\N- Oh! Okay. Erm,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:05.06,0:06:06.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- "Erm" is one.\N- Ahhh!
Dialogue: 0,0:06:06.71,0:06:08.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- "Ah."
Dialogue: 0,0:06:08.76,0:06:10.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I can't do it, you do it!\N- "I can't."
Dialogue: 0,0:06:10.99,0:06:13.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Erm," "AHHH!," "I can't!"\N- I can't!
Dialogue: 0,0:06:13.48,0:06:15.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Very 2015 Tumblr of you there.\N- I know.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:15.11,0:06:17.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- No fucks given anymore.\N- Ooh, nice!
Dialogue: 0,0:06:17.57,0:06:18.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- New era, who dis?
Dialogue: 0,0:06:18.97,0:06:20.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,New era, blond haira.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:20.53,0:06:24.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- TVs, twinks, twat,\N(Vine boom)
Dialogue: 0,0:06:24.56,0:06:26.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to...tally amazing.\N- Hyphenated?
Dialogue: 0,0:06:26.88,0:06:27.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yes.\N- Yeah, thanks, Phil.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:27.91,0:06:29.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Can we have a costume preview?"
Dialogue: 0,0:06:29.39,0:06:31.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hi Ellie, yeah, here you go.\N- (Phil drumming thighs) This is it.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:31.37,0:06:34.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- We're going for Y2K meets ventilation.\N- We are.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:34.23,0:06:37.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Ventilation was the priority.\N- Do you want to see my legs?
Dialogue: 0,0:06:37.11,0:06:39.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Ok, so, Phil said ventilation up top\N- I'm wearing...
Dialogue: 0,0:06:39.88,0:06:42.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- and extreme chafe down there.\N- pleather.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:42.85,0:06:44.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, I'm not gonna wear\Nthese shoes, though.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:44.28,0:06:46.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- He said, I want clam, I want clasp,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:46.67,0:06:49.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want this sticky shit on my calf.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:49.29,0:06:51.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I am squeaking in places\NI shouldn't be squeaking.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:51.71,0:06:53.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Do you like my trash bag trousers?\N(Dan slaps thigh)
Dialogue: 0,0:06:53.67,0:06:56.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Shiny. Look at that.\N- Yeah, the lack of breathability is in.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:56.86,0:06:58.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- "Is there still tickets in Europe?"
Dialogue: 0,0:06:58.18,0:07:00.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yes! There are tickets in Europe\N- Oh yeah.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:00.20,0:07:02.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- and there's some for 29 euros.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:02.04,0:07:04.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I'm not saying that we\Ndon't have friends,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:04.40,0:07:07.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the promoter held\N30 seats in every show
Dialogue: 0,0:07:07.09,0:07:09.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as if we were a popstar that\Nwould have dozens of people
Dialogue: 0,0:07:09.37,0:07:10.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in every country to come see,\N- Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:10.38,0:07:13.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- and then we had to tell them\Nwe don't have that many friends.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:13.21,0:07:15.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Antwerp, Copenhagen,\NBerlin, Warsaw,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:15.32,0:07:17.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Frankfurt, Stockholm,\NOslo, Helsinki,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:17.59,0:07:20.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and also, Amsterdam, \NReykjavik, and Dublin
Dialogue: 0,0:07:20.95,0:07:22.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,on the other side of the year.\N- Yes.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:22.10,0:07:24.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Come see us, there are tickets\Non sale now.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:24.46,0:07:26.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They are cheap, bring a friend.\N- DanAndPhilTour.com
Dialogue: 0,0:07:26.80,0:07:29.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Is this tour more (bark)\Nthan the last two?"
Dialogue: 0,0:07:29.50,0:07:31.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That better be bleeped good.\N- Do you know you can't actually
Dialogue: 0,0:07:31.26,0:07:32.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Don't be Dan. Don't be Dan.\N- say that word on YouTube?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:32.100,0:07:36.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- No, no, Dan has had some\Nimportant videos demonetized.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:36.02,0:07:39.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yes, it will be fundamentally\Nmore (bark) than the last two.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:39.10,0:07:40.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Any plans on October 19th\Nthis year?"
Dialogue: 0,0:07:40.89,0:07:43.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Oh, where are we gonna be?\NWe do a show in LA,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:43.34,0:07:44.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,on October 18th,\N- Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:44.68,0:07:47.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- and then we [drive] into Vegas,\Nis anything interesting happening?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:47.16,0:07:49.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- No seriously, imagine it.\N(Dan and Phil chuckling)
Dialogue: 0,0:07:49.67,0:07:52.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Don't want to get people's hopes up.\N- Don't, don't even.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:52.35,0:07:53.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"How many hours a day\Ndid you rehearse?"
Dialogue: 0,0:07:53.70,0:07:57.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- It's been, like, 12\Nfor the last 3 months.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:57.28,0:07:59.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- 9 AM to 10 PM,\Nhas been today.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:59.14,0:08:00.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- And then thinking\Nabout it in our sleep,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:00.61,0:08:02.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yes.\N- and then waking up at 5 AM with anxiety,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:02.54,0:08:04.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then doing some more.\N- And then doing it all again.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:04.50,0:08:05.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Can I go see the tour alone?"
Dialogue: 0,0:08:05.75,0:08:07.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- 100%.\N- Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:07.12,0:08:09.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- You are not alone when you\Ncome to the Dan and Phil show
Dialogue: 0,0:08:09.20,0:08:11.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because it's like being\Nin the comment section.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:11.27,0:08:13.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- It is.\N- You can turn up by yourself,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:13.14,0:08:14.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and if you're not a\Nsocial kind of person,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:14.98,0:08:17.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,get a drink, sit there, enjoy the show,\N- You can just vibe.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:17.39,0:08:20.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- soak in the vibes. If you want to be\Nlike, hey, who's the person next to you,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:20.90,0:08:24.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,chances are, you have nearly\Neverything in common,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:24.47,0:08:26.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and they might be a best friend,\Nor a future partner.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:26.81,0:08:28.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- It is strong, we see...\N- Just saying.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:28.04,0:08:29.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not matchmaking you,\Nbut I'm just saying.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:29.58,0:08:31.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- A lot of people make friends\Non our tour.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:31.04,0:08:32.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"How do you decide what\Ncities to go to?"
Dialogue: 0,0:08:32.56,0:08:34.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Well, as we know from\Npain in the past,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:34.21,0:08:36.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we are at the whim of\Nvenues and promoters.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:36.31,0:08:37.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yeah.\N- We need an available theatre
Dialogue: 0,0:08:37.83,0:08:41.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and some people that go, "Who are\NDan and Phil? Do we trust them?
Dialogue: 0,0:08:41.00,0:08:42.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Are they reputable entertainers?"\N- Yes.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:42.91,0:08:44.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- And then, maybe they'll let us in.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:44.77,0:08:47.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- When we first did a tour, they didn't\Nwant to let us into America.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:47.12,0:08:49.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Dan laughs)\N- They were like, "Who are these guys?"
Dialogue: 0,0:08:49.00,0:08:51.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- And the thing is, all these people\Nhave access to our Instagrams,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:51.35,0:08:53.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so they know exactly how many\Nfollowers we have in every city,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:53.72,0:08:57.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so if you're ever like, "Why won't\NDan and Phil come to Cape Town?,"
Dialogue: 0,0:08:57.06,0:08:58.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yeah.\N- it's because they've gone, "You have
Dialogue: 0,0:08:58.94,0:09:01.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"600 fans, sorry, there's not enough\Npeople for a theatre there."
Dialogue: 0,0:09:01.31,0:09:03.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- And we are begging these people,\N- We would love to.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:03.08,0:09:04.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- we're like, please let us.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:04.35,0:09:06.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My Mexico thread has 63 emails,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:06.90,0:09:09.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which is basically me going,\N"Any news? Any news?"
Dialogue: 0,0:09:09.16,0:09:12.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- So don't worry, we see you,\Nwe love you, we appreciate you,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:12.74,0:09:14.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we are trying, and one day,\N- Yes.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:14.98,0:09:17.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- one fricking day, one fucking day...
Dialogue: 0,0:09:17.21,0:09:20.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"How is your colon babe?"\N(Dan and Phil laughing)
Dialogue: 0,0:09:20.29,0:09:22.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Like you just walk up to someone\Nand say, "How's your colon, babe?"
Dialogue: 0,0:09:22.46,0:09:25.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- As we should. Normalize colonoscopies.\N- Yes.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:25.22,0:09:26.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Everything is healed.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:26.25,0:09:28.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Can we just take a moment to\Npeacefully acknowledge the
Dialogue: 0,0:09:28.42,0:09:31.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,epic charity case that is Phil Lester?\N- I can't help it.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:31.26,0:09:34.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Once upon a time, he had a migraine\Nproblem, then he swallowed superglue,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:34.79,0:09:37.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then he was bleeding out of\Nhis ass, and then guess what?
Dialogue: 0,0:09:37.01,0:09:39.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We are doing something, I should say\N- Something.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:39.00,0:09:41.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- there's some kind of stunt, event,\N- A moment.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:41.26,0:09:44.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- say some kind of satirical,\Nincredible, theatrical,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:44.44,0:09:48.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,climactic moment of the show,\Nand we were having the first ever
Dialogue: 0,0:09:48.08,0:09:50.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,rehearsal for it, and Phil...\N- I broke a rib.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:50.37,0:09:52.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(gasp, glass shattering)\NOr cracked a rib. I don't know.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:52.34,0:09:55.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But now I can't breathe or laugh\Nor move without pain.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:55.80,0:09:58.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm fine.\N- No, he's not fine, but he's fine.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:58.47,0:09:59.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Dog when???"\N- Now.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:59.93,0:10:00.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Now.\N- Here it is!
Dialogue: 0,0:10:00.90,0:10:03.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Imagine. Yeah, let's get a dog\Nand then leave it in a house
Dialogue: 0,0:10:03.33,0:10:05.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then leave the\Nhouse until February.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:05.24,0:10:08.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- No, there's only ever gonna be a dog\Nif we can dedicate time to the hound.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:08.45,0:10:11.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You shouldn't get one for Christmas.\NSo, not now, but sometime.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:11.83,0:10:13.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Who is better at \Norganizing and planning?"
Dialogue: 0,0:10:13.32,0:10:15.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Dan is a lot better at...\N- What do you think?
Dialogue: 0,0:10:15.82,0:10:18.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Look, actually, I'm great\Nat hotels and flights.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:18.74,0:10:21.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I am the flight and hotel whisperer.\N- Phil loves a deal.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:21.09,0:10:22.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'd say that's more about the money.\N- I like a deal.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:22.99,0:10:24.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"What the (bark)\Nwas the silicone for?
Dialogue: 0,0:10:24.76,0:10:26.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ah.\N- Context. Context right now.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:26.90,0:10:28.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Well, I went on a very\Nsketchy website
Dialogue: 0,0:10:28.58,0:10:30.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and had to buy a whole...\N- Oh, don't say that it's sketchy.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:30.64,0:10:34.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- ...lot of silicone.\N- Look, some people are into full-body
Dialogue: 0,0:10:34.64,0:10:37.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,character transformation\Nsilicone-based onesies,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:37.84,0:10:41.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yes. Complete with cow udders.\N- And Phil spent several hundred dollars
Dialogue: 0,0:10:41.71,0:10:44.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,on an item,\N- I did.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:44.22,0:10:47.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- for a perfectly unsexual\Nmoment of the show.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:47.86,0:10:49.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Which you might see.\N- And I think if they weren't
Dialogue: 0,0:10:49.44,0:10:50.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,scared before, they are now.\NYou made it worse.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:50.92,0:10:53.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- All I'll say is I felt a bit\Nclaustrophobic putting it on.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:53.12,0:10:56.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh my god. "How to get over a\Nbreakup you can't get closure from?"
Dialogue: 0,0:10:56.67,0:10:59.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I think you missed the memo.\N- Oh damn, oh, you're in the wrong inbox.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:59.56,0:11:01.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- You missed the memo for this.\N- Are we qualified for that?
Dialogue: 0,0:11:01.65,0:11:04.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- But I'll just say, they're not\Nworth it, you can do better.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:04.56,0:11:06.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Mm.\N- Enjoy that single life.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:06.92,0:11:10.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's loads of things you can do.\N- Phil said, hoe era.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:10.09,0:11:12.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yeah.\N- Things? More like people {\i1}and{\i0} things.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:12.84,0:11:15.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Rat boy summer\Nyourself into that pool.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:15.95,0:11:19.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I mean, if someone doesn't want\Nto give you closure, that is closure.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:19.46,0:11:20.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- That is closure.\N- You know what I'm saying?
Dialogue: 0,0:11:20.64,0:11:21.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yeah.\N- Sometimes in life,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:21.98,0:11:24.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,answers can't be found, and\Nthat has to be your answer.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:24.50,0:11:26.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Mm.\N- Write your own story.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:26.02,0:11:29.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Did you know that children don't\Nhave kneecaps until they're 6?"
Dialogue: 0,0:11:29.05,0:11:31.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I hate this. Are you lying? Am I dumb?\N- Oh, I hate that! No!
Dialogue: 0,0:11:31.62,0:11:33.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Stop it!\N- Are you tricking me? Is this a fact?
Dialogue: 0,0:11:33.18,0:11:37.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- "Most children's kneecaps turn from\Ncartilage to bone between 2 and 6."
Dialogue: 0,0:11:37.02,0:11:39.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Ugh! No. Get away.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:39.34,0:11:41.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- "Phil, what F1 knowledge\Ndid Dan force feed you?"
Dialogue: 0,0:11:41.49,0:11:43.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Dan laughs)\N- Alright. Here we go.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:43.60,0:11:45.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Quiz me. Quiz me.\N- Who are the Ferrari drivers?
Dialogue: 0,0:11:45.98,0:11:49.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Charles Leclerc. Leclerc!\N- (Frenchly) Leclerc!
Dialogue: 0,0:11:49.12,0:11:50.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(child in video)\N"LeCLERCghugh!"
Dialogue: 0,0:11:50.34,0:11:54.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- And, uh, Kyle Pe...\N- Car...
Dialogue: 0,0:11:54.28,0:11:56.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Carlos Sainz.\N- Ooh...
Dialogue: 0,0:11:56.41,0:11:58.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I got it. I got it.\N- Taking up, taking up brain space.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:58.70,0:11:59.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's all you need to\Nknow about the sport.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:59.74,0:12:01.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I've got more. Valtteri Bottas, \NLewis Hamilton,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:01.92,0:12:03.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,George Russell,\N- Yes.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:03.59,0:12:06.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Stephen Mulhern. No, that's a magician.\N- No.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:06.89,0:12:09.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Stephen Mulhern in a car?!
Dialogue: 0,0:12:09.49,0:12:10.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I don't know what I was thinking.\N- Sorry, that is the most
Dialogue: 0,0:12:10.80,0:12:12.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,British reference ever.\N- That was very British.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:12.34,0:12:13.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- What the hell, Phil.\N- Yeah, I don't know.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:13.72,0:12:15.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Did y'all have a brat summer?"
Dialogue: 0,0:12:15.27,0:12:17.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- We had a rat summer.\N- Rat boy summer.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:17.17,0:12:20.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We were in... a... holiday place.\NI won't say where we were.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:20.33,0:12:22.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Phil's trying to dox\Nour holiday location.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:22.13,0:12:24.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- We went on holiday, \Nit was nice. Very ratty.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:24.80,0:12:26.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- And since then we've been\Nrehearsing for a tour.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:26.31,0:12:33.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- (Dan singing) Summeeerrr...\N- But to be honest, the true essence
Dialogue: 0,0:12:33.25,0:12:36.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of a brat summer sounds\Nhorrendous to me. Up at 4 AM...
Dialogue: 0,0:12:36.39,0:12:40.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Are you not a 365 party girl?\N- No. I'm a half an hour party boy.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:40.33,0:12:42.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Terrible Influence when\Nyou're bumping that?
Dialogue: 0,0:12:42.18,0:12:45.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And you're about to be\Nso 365 until January,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:45.08,0:12:46.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- That's fine.\N- so you better become it.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:46.98,0:12:48.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I'll take it in small doses.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:48.36,0:12:50.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- "Is Jake Gyllenhaal hot?" What kind\Nof (barking) question is that?
Dialogue: 0,0:12:50.82,0:12:51.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yes.\N- Yes.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:51.53,0:12:53.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He's one of the...\N- Who says no? Find me.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:53.09,0:12:54.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- He's one of the rare people\N- Choke.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:54.73,0:12:56.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- that have been hot at\Nevery stage of his career.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:56.80,0:12:59.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Donnie Darko through to\Nwhatever the hell he's doing now.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:59.46,0:13:02.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's all... hotness. I say it's\None of the-
Dialogue: 0,0:13:02.88,0:13:04.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Do you need a moment, Phil?\N- Yes.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:04.51,0:13:05.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- He made you gay?\N- He did.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:05.72,0:13:07.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Right. Yep.\N- Do you know people who are like,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:07.05,0:13:08.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Oh, Phil's really going off\Non Jake Gyllenhaal.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:08.58,0:13:10.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I'm not, I'm just saying-\N- No, we're having a moment,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:10.32,0:13:11.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and that's okay, we just need\Nto acknowledge that.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:11.51,0:13:15.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- There are some people that are so\Nbeyond hot, even if I was a straight man
Dialogue: 0,0:13:15.51,0:13:18.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- You'd have to be like, Jake Gyllenhaal,\N- I would be like, yes.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:18.02,0:13:20.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- he can get it, he can take it,\Nhe can throw it across the room.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:20.01,0:13:23.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Give me that Gyllen-\N- I would wash his sweaty vest.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:23.48,0:13:24.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Mm. Ok.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:24.90,0:13:26.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- "Merch vibes?"
Dialogue: 0,0:13:26.07,0:13:29.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- You wanted merch vibes, huh?\N- Oh, look at this!
Dialogue: 0,0:13:29.30,0:13:31.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- You like a bit of chrome? Ooh.\N- Ooh, look at that.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:31.50,0:13:33.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Can I spoil this one? Please?\N- Go on then. Do it.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:33.99,0:13:35.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Dan and Phil laughing)
Dialogue: 0,0:13:35.99,0:13:38.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Already every person on \Nthe crew wants to wear that.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:38.20,0:13:41.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Someone's like, I'm gonna\Nget this for my grandma,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:41.17,0:13:42.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- They need it.\N- and I will make her wear it.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:42.74,0:13:44.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- We always like to\Nhave one funny thing.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:44.11,0:13:45.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Color energy, oh.\N- Oh, oh.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:45.31,0:13:47.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- We do have a kind of\Nwild update, though,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:47.49,0:13:49.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yes.\N- which is, as of yesterday,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:49.31,0:13:53.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,every single VIP ticket for our show\Nto come to the meet-and-greet
Dialogue: 0,0:13:53.32,0:13:55.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,has completely sold out,\N- They're gone,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:55.09,0:13:57.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we're gonna be meeting so many of you.\N- at every single show around the world,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:57.93,0:14:00.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so thank you.\N- Thanks.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:00.05,0:14:02.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Tour hasn't even started yet,\Nthat's never happened before.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:02.100,0:14:06.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There may be a couple venues where\Nthey found some space to add more,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:06.28,0:14:08.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so do check just in case.\N- Look around.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:08.58,0:14:11.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- But, for most of them,\Nwe wanted to do something
Dialogue: 0,0:14:11.18,0:14:12.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for all of the people that\Nalready bought tickets,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:12.89,0:14:14.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and for the people that\Nmay yet be on the fence.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:14.77,0:14:17.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yes, so anyone that's\Nalready bought a ticket
Dialogue: 0,0:14:17.24,0:14:19.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or anyone that's gets one\Nin the next month,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:19.05,0:14:22.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Anyone who buys any ticket.\N- Any kind of ticket. The cheap ones.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:22.85,0:14:26.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Two people from every single\Nshow are going to get upgraded
Dialogue: 0,0:14:26.55,0:14:29.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to the full meet-and-greet. You get\Nto meet us, you get to have some merch,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:29.29,0:14:31.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you get to come to the thing early.\NThe whole shebang.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:31.91,0:14:34.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Bang.\N- And all you have to do is have a ticket.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:34.24,0:14:36.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And that is everyone\Nwho's already got one
Dialogue: 0,0:14:36.07,0:14:38.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and anyone who gets one\Nin the next month.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:38.43,0:14:41.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So if you and a friend are like,\Noh my god, I found these ones
Dialogue: 0,0:14:41.01,0:14:43.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that are really really cheap and we\Ncould just like, randomly meet them,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:43.12,0:14:44.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Go grab 'em.\N- Do it. Do it.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:44.72,0:14:46.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- But make sure you do it in the next\Nmonth because then it runs out.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:46.17,0:14:48.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- You know how Phil always wins\Nthese competitions and stuff?
Dialogue: 0,0:14:48.38,0:14:50.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- It could be you.\N- It's because he enters them.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:50.11,0:14:53.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yes. And if any of this tour\Ntalk has tickled your pickle,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:53.85,0:14:56.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,make sure to go to DanAndPhilTour.com,\Nsee if we're coming near your town...
Dialogue: 0,0:14:56.99,0:14:59.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- We're going everywhere.\N- If not, travel.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:59.24,0:15:01.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Get on a train for half an hour.\N- Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:01.32,0:15:03.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- It's worth it.\N- Eight hour road trip with the bestie.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:03.38,0:15:04.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- It's worth it.\N- It's worth it.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:04.65,0:15:07.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You don't want to be like, oh,\Nthese guys meant so much to me.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:07.56,0:15:09.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I could've waved at them from\Nacross the room.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:09.48,0:15:11.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Now I can't.\N- We want to see you.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:11.06,0:15:12.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Come and see us. See what\Nwe've been working on.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:12.84,0:15:14.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We've been working so hard on it,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:14.38,0:15:15.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and it'd be great if you could.\N- I don't think we can even begin
Dialogue: 0,0:15:15.79,0:15:19.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to explain how hard we've been\Nworking on this show for months.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:19.28,0:15:20.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- A little word from the other Phil.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:20.69,0:15:23.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thanks again to my bros, Opera\NBrowser, for sponsoring this video.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:23.17,0:15:26.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you want to upgrade your\Nbrowsing life, make it super satisfying,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:26.87,0:15:29.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,click the link below, get it for free,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:29.14,0:15:31.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and have a lovely day.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:31.26,0:15:33.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Thanks, Phil. Yeah.\N- Yeah. Thank you. Great. Do it.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:33.32,0:15:36.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, subscribe! Check out the gaming\Nchannel, we'll be posting loads of little
Dialogue: 0,0:15:36.35,0:15:38.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,sneaky tour bits on there.\N- More stuff. Go check out our Instagram,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:38.91,0:15:40.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,our Twitters. We're posting\Nall kinds of sneaks.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:40.79,0:15:42.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Yeah. AmazingPhil\Nmight be a bit quiet,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:42.49,0:15:44.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but I'll poke my nose in.\N- He's busy, he'll come say hi
Dialogue: 0,0:15:44.35,0:15:47.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,every now and then. \N- Sometimes. Have a lovely day
Dialogue: 0,0:15:47.09,0:15:49.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and we will see you on stage.\N- Thank you for having us.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:49.71,0:15:51.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Bye.\N- Ciao.