[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:03.79,0:00:08.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's three o'clock in the morning, and I think my parents really like lesbians.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:08.57,0:00:11.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So to show my parents how much I love them,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:11.22,0:00:14.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I've turned my parents vehicle into more than just a vehicle.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:14.92,0:00:18.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I've turned it into the slut mobile.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:18.28,0:00:24.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Won't mom and dad be surprised and overwhelmed tomorrow morning when they get up to go to work?
Dialogue: 0,0:00:24.24,0:00:26.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I'm hiding inside a box right now,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:26.70,0:00:28.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in my parents' driveway,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:29.28,0:00:31.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that normally contains garbage.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:31.94,0:00:37.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And this box is right beside the car, in the driveway.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:37.70,0:00:40.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ok, so it's daylight now,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:40.62,0:00:45.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and my parents seem to be awake, 'cause the light in the house is on.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:45.37,0:00:47.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I hope my parents like my gift.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:47.55,0:00:52.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I hope when they come out of the house they really enjoy the car that I've painted for them.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:52.29,0:00:53.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Their car.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:59.37,0:01:01.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Holy Christ!
Dialogue: 0,0:01:01.56,0:01:03.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You like it dad?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:03.24,0:01:05.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Come look at it dad.\N- Go talk to your mother, I'm going to work.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:05.61,0:01:09.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- What's the big deal?\N- Yeah, big deal, that better be off.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:09.32,0:01:14.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- It's permanent, come look at it.\N- That's permanent? (...)(heading?) to the police right now.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:14.20,0:01:16.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- What're you talking about?\N- Yeah
Dialogue: 0,0:01:16.82,0:01:18.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Dad, it's a present.\N- Yeah, right.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:18.81,0:01:22.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- It's a present.\N- Well, it's completely untasteful, and ridiculous.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:22.59,0:01:25.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Why?\N- (inaudible)
Dialogue: 0,0:01:25.30,0:01:28.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Where 'you going?\N- I'm going to work, I'm walking, ...\N- You're walking?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:28.24,0:01:32.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I can't take the car.\N- Why can't you take the car?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:34.41,0:01:37.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- What? It's a present for you guys.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:37.46,0:01:41.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- It's to be nice.\N- That'd better be washable or something.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:41.100,0:01:43.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- It's not, it's airbrushed.\N- (...) Yeah, sure.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:43.69,0:01:45.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- It costed me four-hundred dollars to get it done.\N- Yeah, right?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:45.56,0:01:48.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- It did. It costed me four-hundred dollars to get done.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:48.98,0:01:50.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- What you mean you're walking to work?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:50.92,0:01:53.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- You can't walk to work.\N- Yeah, right.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:53.24,0:01:57.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- What? What d'you mean "yeah, right?"\N- Well, how are you gonna show that on television? Stupid!
Dialogue: 0,0:01:58.74,0:02:02.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- What? Oh, come on, don't walk to work!\N- (It's) obscene, insanity.\N- Don't walk to work!
Dialogue: 0,0:02:04.29,0:02:06.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's not obscene, it's love.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:06.95,0:02:08.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Those women are love, dad!
Dialogue: 0,0:02:08.68,0:02:09.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You like it?
Dialogue: 0,0:02:09.76,0:02:12.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Mom!\N- Noo!
Dialogue: 0,0:02:12.65,0:02:15.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(You've) being trying to wipe it off? Mom!
Dialogue: 0,0:02:15.27,0:02:16.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Whoa, mom, what?
Dialogue: 0,0:02:16.33,0:02:17.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Come look at it!\N- No, it's disgusting!
Dialogue: 0,0:02:17.27,0:02:20.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- It's not disgusting, just let me in, let's talk.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:20.73,0:02:23.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is insane. I mean, i worked so hard to make everybody happy.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:23.75,0:02:26.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I hid in that box all night long.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:26.59,0:02:30.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My mom has no intention of talking to me on camera about the slutmobile.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:30.94,0:02:35.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Fortunately, she left a few messages on my answering machine.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:35.06,0:02:37.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And, well here they are.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:37.65,0:02:42.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Next message:\N- Tom, it's your mother. That you did to our car it's really gross, and disgusting.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:45.58,0:02:49.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I'm not impressed. I knew that something was happening.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:49.69,0:02:53.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's just another little horrible thing for us to cope with.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:53.51,0:02:58.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Call me, as soon as you get this message, I am livid.\N- Next message:
Dialogue: 0,0:02:58.35,0:03:04.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Tom, this is your mother. That car ('d) better be back here immediately, and back put to original condition.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:04.59,0:03:07.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I don't find it funny, there's nothing funny about it at all.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:07.83,0:03:12.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's insulting, once again, you know, it's just, it's not funny.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:12.06,0:03:15.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's ruining things that don't belong to you.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:15.66,0:03:21.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- And it's making me sick, and I'm fed up with that.\N- Next message:
Dialogue: 0,0:03:21.40,0:03:25.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Tom, it's eight o'clock in the morning. You've been here, you've gone.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:25.51,0:03:30.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I want my car fixed, it's disgusting.\N- Next message:
Dialogue: 0,0:03:30.72,0:03:33.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Tom, it's your mother, for the fourth call.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:33.42,0:03:40.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want the car taken and returned to its original condition, or your dad and I are going to report this to the police.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:40.35,0:03:43.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is ridiculous, I'm not putting up with it.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:43.96,0:03:49.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You can, you know, be charged with vandalism, or whatever the charge would be.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:49.57,0:03:56.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But you're not going to ruin my things anymore and leave me in the lurch because I don't have a car to use.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:56.05,0:04:00.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now, get over here, and get the car, and repair it, immediately.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:00.57,0:04:03.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- And I'm not kidding.\N- End of message.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:03.46,0:04:07.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Oh, come on, don't walk to work!\N- Obscene, insanity.\N- Don't walk to work!
Dialogue: 0,0:04:07.92,0:04:10.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's not obscene, it's love!
Dialogue: 0,0:04:10.91,0:04:12.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Those women are love, dad!
Dialogue: 0,0:04:12.53,0:04:16.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, dad can't take the bus to work, I'm gonna take the slut-mobile to the bus stop.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:16.17,0:04:20.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Wow, there's a lot of people at the bus stop, I hope my dad it's not embarassed by his slut-mobile.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:20.82,0:04:24.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Come on, I'll drive you to work.\N- (inaudible)
Dialogue: 0,0:04:24.25,0:04:27.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- What?\N- That thing'd better be washed up (...), I don't know how you got it on there.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:27.68,0:04:30.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's permanent. It's a present!
Dialogue: 0,0:04:30.08,0:04:32.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Dad, don't worry if your neighbors see the slut mobile,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:32.91,0:04:35.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean, it's just your slut mobile. RIght?
Dialogue: 0,0:04:35.03,0:04:37.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's just your slut mobile!
Dialogue: 0,0:04:37.19,0:04:45.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Ok, first of all, I thought you liked lesbians, and ...\N- What?
Dialogue: 0,0:04:45.28,0:04:49.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I thought you liked lesbians, and sluts.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:49.02,0:04:53.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And so I thought it would be a nice thing to gift you.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:53.72,0:04:58.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's all. Whether or not I was funny or not, I thought you liked that kind of thing.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:58.82,0:05:07.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Ok? That aside, now I know you don't like lesbians.\N- I didn't say that. I don't want them on my car!
Dialogue: 0,0:05:07.32,0:05:09.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Ok, so you...\N- End of discussion.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:09.98,0:05:13.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- So it's not that you have a problem with lesbians then.