A 3 decker!
Consisting of One - The Sneetches
Two - The Zax
and Three - Green Eggs and Ham
Now the star bellied sneetches had bellys with stars.
The plain bellied sneetches had none upon thars.
No stars on their bellys. No stars upon thars.
Now those stars weren't so big.
They were really quite small.
You would think such a thing wouldn't matter at all.
But because they had stars, all the
star bellied sneetches would brag.
"We're the best kind of sneetch on the beaches!"
With their snoots in the air,
the would sniff and they'd snort.
They'd have nothing to do with the plain bellied sort.
"Ronald, remember, when you are out walking,
you walk past a sneetch of that type without talking."
"Keep your snoot in the air, and remember to snort.
We have no truck whatever with the plain bellied sort."
When the star bellied children went out to play ball.
Could a plain belly get in the game? Not at all!
You only could play if your bellies had stars.
And the plain bellied children had none upon thars.
Yar Yar...your belly's got no stars.
When the star bellied sneetches had frankfurter roasts,
or picnics or parties or marshmallow toasts,
They never invited the plain belly sneetches.
They left them out cold and in the dark
on the beaches.
They kept them away.
They never let them come near.
That's how they treated them year after year.
They got snort. They got snooted.
Their bottoms got booted.
While the star bellied sneetches all taunted and hooted.
"They just are not suited. No stars upon thars!"
Then one day, it seems while the plain
bellied sneetches were moping and doping
alone on the beaches, just sitting there
wishing their bellies had stars.
A stranger approached in the strangest of cars.
"My friends, I have seen they've been treating you mean.
My name is Sylvester McMonkey McBean.
I know precisely why you're so unhappy.
And that I can fix. I'm the fix it up chappy.
machine noises
My prices are low, and I work with great
speed and my work is 100% guaranteed.
By my new patent process of protoprotoxis
of the inner subnuclear neausbaum nogoxsis
you'll get a star like the star bellied
sneetch for the mere paltry payment of $3 each.
A star? Here?
Yes my friend, there.
And the first to go through gets the trip at
half fare.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
machine noises
It works!
Yeah, It works! It works!
Ladies and gentlemen. We are faced with a
most awkward dilemma.
We're the true star bellys.
We had them first.
We're still the best sneetches, and
they're still the worst.
Yeah, but how are we going to proove it?
Which is which? I can't tell us apart.
Let me through...excuse me.
Step aside please. Thank you.
You don't know me my friends
but calm down if you can, I'm here
to help the original star bellied clan.
Those upstarts it's true now have
stars just like you.
But follow me my friends and you know what
I'll do? I'll make you again the best sneetches
on the beaches and all it will cost you is
$10 eaches.
Belly stars my dear friends are no
longer in style. I'll have yours off in a
very short while.
In my wondrous machine which
eradicates stars. Then you won't look like sneetches
who have them on thars.
Eradicate these? Eradicates these with the greatest of ease!
Provided you pay your 10 bucks if you please.
Here's $10 for the boy and $10 for me.
Thank you.
Thank you. Thank you.
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How original! How distinctive!
How exclusive!
Then of course, those with stars
all got frightfully mad.
To be wearing a star now was frightfully bad.
And of course old Sylvester McMonkey McBean,
invited them into his "Star Off" machine.
Thank you. Thank you.
machine noise
Then of course from then on,
as you probably guessed, things really got into a horrible mess.
machine noise
All the rest of that day
on those wild screaming beaches,
the fix it up chappy kept fixing up sneetches!
Off again, on again, in again, out again.
Through the machine, they raced round and about
again changing their stars every minute or two.
They kept paying money.
They kept running through until
neither the plain or the star bellies
knew whether this one or that one was
this one or which one was what one.
Or what one was who.
Then, when every last cent of their money
was spent, the fix it up chappy
packed up and he went.
machine noise
And he laughed as he drove his
car up the beach.
They never will learn. No, you can't teach a sneetch.
But, McBean was quite wrong.
I am happy to say that the sneetches
got really quite smart on that day.
That day they decided that sneetches
are sneetches and no kind of sneetch
is the best on the beaches.
That day all the sneetches forgot about stars,
and whether or not they had one upon thars.