Today I’m gonna teach you how to celebrate
freedom like a real American. So pay attention!

Or don’t. It’s a free country.

That was lesson number one.

You’re welcome.

Hi it's Emily from Bite Size Vegan and welcome
to a vegan nugget so American it’s busting

out of its bite size britches – ‘cause
you ain’t free till you’ve exercised your

right to grow the glory of your freedom gut
through at least one pair of pants!

America!

That was another lesson. Try to keep up.

Today is the 4th of July. Or the day I’m
posting this video is the 4th. But it doesn’t

matter when you watch because freedom means
not having to be accurate, consistent or timely.

That one was a freebie.

July 4th is the day America celebrates our
independence from foreign tyranny. The day

our forefathers declared that “all men are
created equal” expect of course “the merciless

Indian Savages whose known rule of warfare,
is an undistinguished destruction of all ages,

sexes and conditions.”

‘Cause it don’t matter who’s been living
on the top of the mountain. It’s the man

who climbs that thing and plants the flag
that can be named the victor!

I just made that up. That’s a lesson in
the freedom to sound smart as hell.

America!

And anyway, we still honor the Indians with
our football teams and casinos and our annual

day of thanks for the corn and stuff, which
also involves more football,

so that’s basically all them.

America!

Ya see, freedom means you can change your
mind anytime and admit if you were wrong and

make up for it. Like that slavery bit. They
fixed that too…almost 90 years later…

America

But the most American way to declare your
independence and revel in your freedom is

with a big-ole-American-BBQ! Serve on up some
burgers and sausage, some ribs and wings,

mountain of chip and dip, and a couple gallons
of ice cream to eat

while you blow crap up in the sky!

America!

Cause nothing says freedom like the enslavement
of billions!

Nothing says independence like obliterating
the rights of others.

Nothing declares equality like deciding who
lives and who dies based on how they look.

Nothing displays family values like bonding
over the spoils of another

family’s complete destruction.

And nothing says America like affording more
rights to your taste buds

than living, breathing beings.

America!

You’re free to give this video a like and
share it around to spark discussion. Or patriotic rage.

You’re also at liberty to subscribe
to the channel for more vegan content every

Monday, Wednesday and some Fridays. And if
you so wish, you’re within your rights to

choose to support Bite Size Vegan’s educational
mission by clicking the support links below

or in the sidebar. Now go live vegan, in America, and I’ll see you soon.

I'm gonna go in and out of accent like a maniac in this thing, apparently.

It's like when I visit my family, my Southern comes back

and if I record a video then I start talking the way you guys normally hear me talk.