0:00:02.000,0:00:09.000 Season 1 Episode 2: "The Maid" 0:00:09.000,0:00:15.000 - All right Federica, concentrate, you won't fail, you can do this. 0:00:15.000,0:00:21.000 - Federica, instead of forcing him to guess, just tell him you need a maid. 0:00:21.000,0:00:28.000 - C'mon Martina! If blackmails, tears and hints were not an effective tool for women 0:00:28.000,0:00:33.000 there wouldn't be any bad girls in the soap operas 0:00:33.000,0:00:36.000 - It's so late now! I need to leave 0:00:36.000,0:00:39.000 - Shoot! Shoot you idiot! 0:00:39.000,0:00:44.000 - Now's the time Federica 0:00:44.000,0:00:47.000 - Move! Move! 0:00:47.000,0:00:50.000 - Sorry! I have so many things to do 0:00:50.000,0:00:54.000 If only I could get some help... 0:00:54.000,0:00:56.000 - Honey, you should have said that before 0:00:56.000,0:01:00.000 - So you do get my hint? 0:01:00.000,0:01:06.000 - No, but you should have said it before 'cause now we're watching the match and you're interrupting! 0:01:06.000,0:01:13.000 - You see? You never have time for me, not even 5 minutes. 0:01:13.000,0:01:20.000 - Just wait for the break and you'll get 15 minutes 0:01:20.000,0:01:22.000 - You always ignore me 0:01:22.000,0:01:26.000 - Sorry honey, but you're interrupting in the middle of the match 0:01:26.000,0:01:30.000 - It's over now, its halftime 0:01:30.000,0:01:33.000 - But I need to watch the summary of the goals I already watched 0:01:33.000,0:01:41.000 - I need a maid to clean up so much filth!! 0:01:41.000,0:01:43.000 are you listening?? Otherwise I'll call my mom to come! 0:01:43.000,0:01:48.000 - So our filth is not enough for you? You need to bring your mother, too? 0:01:48.000,0:01:53.000 - I'll call her to help me with the house cleaning, you horse face! 0:01:53.000,0:01:56.000 and don't insult my mother! Have I ever told you your mom 0:01:56.000,0:02:00.000 is a chicken that laid only one ball?? 0:02:00.000,0:02:06.000 - Excuse me but I have two! Two of my kids are present here 0:02:06.000,0:02:08.000 and I don't want to argue in front of them! 0:02:08.000,0:02:14.000 Let's cool down, shall we? 0:02:14.000,0:02:17.000 - You're right. Look, I'm so cool and calm now, you see? 0:02:17.000,0:02:25.000 - Ludovico, please I need a maid to help with the house chores. 0:02:25.000,0:02:29.000 you hear me stingy donkey?? 0:02:29.000,0:02:34.000 - Look, let's not argue, the second half is starting now. Let's discuss about it later. 0:02:34.000,0:02:39.000 - Either you give me an answer right now or... 0:02:39.000,0:02:43.000 - Or what?? Are you going to turn the TV off?? You wouldn't dare! 0:02:43.000,0:02:49.000 - No, but I'll pause the video recorder until you give me an answer! 0:02:49.000,0:02:52.000 - No, no! Wait 'till it's over 0:02:52.000,0:02:55.000 - You've seen it 8 times already! 0:02:55.000,0:02:59.000 - But maybe this time the Cruz Azul team will win 0:02:59.000,0:03:04.000 - So?? 0:03:04.000,0:03:09.000 - All right! But you must hire her by tomorrow evening 0:03:09.000,0:03:11.000 or there's no deal! 0:03:11.000,0:03:21.000 - Yes! 0:03:21.000,0:03:24.000 At the Office 0:03:24.000,0:03:30.000 - So, then I told her: "why don't you hire a maid to help you with the house chores?" 0:03:30.000,0:03:31.000 - What did she reply? 0:03:31.000,0:03:35.000 - At first she refused, but I convinced her 0:03:35.000,0:03:41.000 - She became very affectionate and she even played the Cruz Azul match for me 0:03:41.000,0:03:44.000 - But you've seen that match 7 times 0:03:44.000,0:03:45.000 - 8 0:03:45.000,0:03:49.000 - But I watched it again so she wouldn't feel bad 0:03:49.000,0:03:52.000 - The only issue I see in all this is that since we are neighbors 0:03:52.000,0:03:56.000 I'm sure Federica will tell Martina to get our own maid, too. 0:03:56.000,0:03:59.000 - Not at all, Flavio. Federica would never do that 0:03:59.000,0:04:04.000 - Of course! Demand that Flavio hires a maid for you 0:04:04.000,0:04:08.000 - Hmm, I doubt it Federica, it's too expensive 0:04:08.000,0:04:10.000 Besides Flavio doesn't make that much money to get that luxury 0:04:10.000,0:04:17.000 -So?? Ludovico makes half of that and I was able to convince him with a little manipulation 0:04:17.000,0:04:22.000 - Plus, that's a good way to ensure he doesn't have enough money to go to a stripping club 0:04:22.000,0:04:24.000 to see brainless women 0:04:24.000,0:04:27.000 - Brainless women? You are right: I need a maid 0:04:27.000,0:04:33.000 - The only problem is that I have to hire her by this evening 0:04:33.000,0:04:38.000 - Impossible. You won't have time to place an ad 0:04:38.000,0:04:46.000 - I have an idea! Come with me 0:04:46.000,0:04:50.000 - Come over here, come so that all of P.Lush City sees you on TV. What is it? 0:04:50.000,0:04:54.000 - I'm willing to divorce if there's a good match out there 0:04:54.000,0:04:55.000 - Are you looking for a husband? 0:04:55.000,0:05:01.000 - No, I meant a match as in soccer match, 0:05:01.000,0:05:05.000 'cause where there's a good match, my husband ignores me! 0:05:05.000,0:05:12.000 - Aah, and I want to announce that if you're a woman looking to make lots of money 0:05:12.000,0:05:19.000 you should go for a casting tonight at my house: 1327 P.Lush Ave. 0:05:19.000,0:05:30.000 The job is easy and I promise you'll feel at home. Thanks! 0:05:30.000,0:05:35.000 - Hey, what are you doing with those paper planes? 0:05:35.000,0:05:37.000 - I'm playing Osama bin Laden 0:05:37.000,0:05:39.000 - How does that work? 0:05:39.000,0:05:44.000 - You have to hit in the middle 0:05:44.000,0:05:49.000 - So how is Federica going to hire a maid? It's not easy nowadays 0:05:49.000,0:05:51.000 - That's the trick 0:05:51.000,0:05:54.000 The deadline is tonight; she won't be able to place an ad 0:05:54.000,0:05:56.000 so she won't be able to hire one 0:05:56.000,0:06:00.000 - What if she makes your kids distribute flyers? 0:06:00.000,0:06:05.000 - She would never use them for that! 0:06:05.000,0:06:08.000 - This kid is being rescued right now. 0:06:08.000,0:06:13.000 after several attempts and he's finally with his mother 0:06:13.000,0:06:16.000 - Ma'am, what do you feel? 0:06:16.000,0:06:20.000 - I feel...disgusted 'cause he stinks 0:06:20.000,0:06:22.000 - But I'll take a moment to tell all women 0:06:22.000,0:06:27.000 who are trying to make lots of money that they should go apply for a job at my house tonight 0:06:27.000,0:06:35.000 1327 P.Lush Ave. The job is super easy and I swear you'll feel at home 0:06:35.000,0:06:40.000 - My baby, be more careful 0:06:40.000,0:06:43.000 - But you pushed me into the manhole 0:06:43.000,0:06:47.000 - Quiet! 0:06:47.000,0:06:52.000 - Well, remember the casting for the job is tonight 0:06:52.000,0:06:55.000 - You're too generous 0:06:55.000,0:06:59.000 Hiring a maid with your salary 0:06:59.000,0:07:03.000 - No, that's not enough, I'll have to work overtime 0:07:03.000,0:07:07.000 - But without the ad, no girls will show up 0:07:07.000,0:07:11.000 - In the end, I'll avoid having to pay for a maid 0:07:11.000,0:07:15.000 - What if she finds a way to find candidates? 0:07:15.000,0:07:20.000 - She only does that when she wants to make me miserable 0:07:20.000,0:07:26.000 - Imagine, her going to live TV for that! 0:07:26.000,0:07:32.000 - This morning there was protest in the city... 0:07:32.000,0:07:34.000 - Leave her alone, please. 0:07:34.000,0:07:39.000 - How are you, sir? I just stopped by quickly 0:07:39.000,0:07:45.000 Like many who work here: they just "stop by" 0:07:45.000,0:07:51.000 - I only came to say to all women that tonight I'm having a casting 0:07:51.000,0:07:57.000 1327 P.Lush Avenue 0:07:57.000,0:08:02.000 The job is super easy and I swear you'll feel at home 0:08:02.000,0:08:05.000 - That's it. I'm leaving now 0:08:05.000,0:08:13.000 - I never miss your TV shows 0:08:13.000,0:08:18.000 I see you every Thursday night 0:08:18.000,0:08:23.000 Thanks, but my show's on Friday 0:08:23.000,0:08:29.000 Shortly after... 0:08:29.000,0:08:34.000 - You see? She's not even here. Her chance is gone 0:08:34.000,0:08:36.000 and I did want to please her this time 0:08:36.000,0:08:38.000 - I'm here! 0:08:38.000,0:08:42.000 - What happened? Do we have a maid? 0:08:42.000,0:08:43.000 - Did anyone show up? 0:08:43.000,0:09:20.000 - No one came 0:09:20.000,0:09:27.000 - Let me explain: we'll select a winner by direct elimination 0:09:27.000,0:09:30.000 - First of all, you should let go the ugliest ones automatically 0:09:30.000,0:09:34.000 - Okay, so my sister- and my mother-in-law should leave now 0:09:34.000,0:09:40.000 - Enough! Stop playing dumb and give me a kiss! 0:09:40.000,0:09:47.000 - A casting to hire a maid, sis? Only a dumbass could think of that 0:09:47.000,0:09:54.000 - Yes, only a failed man with a miserable salary would think of hiring one of them as a maid 0:09:54.000,0:10:02.000 - A maid?? - How dare you!! You lied to me! 0:10:02.000,0:10:04.000 - What will you do now with these women? 0:10:04.000,0:10:07.000 - I'm not sure, but if I'm going to spend my salary on a maid 0:10:07.000,0:10:13.000 at least it should be one that I like 0:10:13.000,0:10:15.000 - Okay, attention! Do you know why you're here? 0:10:15.000,0:10:17.000 - Yes, to sing 0:10:17.000,0:10:18.000 - To dance 0:10:18.000,0:10:21.000 - To act 0:10:21.000,0:10:24.000 - Yes, but before you'll have to put up with me 0:10:24.000,0:10:30.000 - Put up? I knew it! All TV producers are the same 0:10:30.000,0:10:33.000 - TV producers? I'm not such thing! 0:10:33.000,0:10:38.000 - Federica, you told them this is not X-Factor, right? 0:10:38.000,0:10:48.000 - Not X-FActor? I'm leaving now! 0:10:48.000,0:10:50.000 - As I was saying... 0:10:50.000,0:10:53.000 - Daddy, daddy! It's itchy 0:10:53.000,0:10:54.000 - What is? 0:10:54.000,0:10:56.000 -The tail's itchy 0:10:56.000,0:10:58.000 - Didn't your mom worm you? 0:10:58.000,0:11:09.000 - I mean the tail of the rat I found when I fell into the manhole. Look. 0:11:09.000,0:11:12.000 - Dad, can we keep it as a pet? 0:11:12.000,0:11:16.000 - Yes daddy! We can chase it, step on it, throw rocks at it 0:11:16.000,0:11:23.000 - Junior! If you want to throw rocks at rats, do it with your Aunt Lucrecia! 0:11:23.000,0:11:25.000 - Besides you'll scare your sister with this rat 0:11:25.000,0:11:32.000 - He's right, we can scare Bibi. Good idea! 0:11:32.000,0:11:40.000 - We'll throw it in her room, lock it and the come back 0:11:40.000,0:11:46.000 - Okay we have two final candidates for the job 0:11:46.000,0:11:47.000 - Sorry, sorry. 0:11:47.000,0:11:48.000 -Who are you? 0:11:48.000,0:11:51.000 - I'm Excelsa. 0:11:51.000,0:11:53.000 I'm here because there are many problems in my country: 0:11:53.000,0:11:58.000 devaluations, the national team is eliminated in the first round of the World Cup 0:11:58.000,0:12:02.000 - So you're Argentinian? Why are you in Mexico? 0:12:02.000,0:12:08.000 - I came to triumph. All Argentinians triumph here 0:12:08.000,0:12:14.000 So many Argentinians here have made it big 0:12:14.000,0:12:20.000 All you need to make it big in Mexico is being Argentinian 0:12:20.000,0:12:25.000 Maybe I can even find a husband like Brad Pitt 0:12:25.000,0:12:31.000 or perhaps I'll get naturalized to play in the national soccer team 0:12:31.000,0:12:40.000 - Come here a sec. How will you choose one of those 3? 0:12:40.000,0:12:45.000 - Good night, welcome to Miss P.Lush Contest 0:12:45.000,0:12:49.000 our first candidate is Ms. Azalea 0:12:49.000,0:12:59.000 Hi, I'm Azalea, and I have Master's in cleaning and housekeeping from P.Lush University 0:12:59.000,0:13:04.000 I was born in a small town but I was raised over by India 0:13:04.000,0:13:05.000 - Near Tibet? 0:13:05.000,0:13:17.000 - No, I was raised, by and Indian cook. She's the one that hired me as a maid 0:13:17.000,0:13:19.000 - But, are you a good cook? 0:13:19.000,0:13:22.000 - Of course! International food is my area of expertise 0:13:22.000,0:13:28.000 I learned to make spaguetti in Italy, paella in Spain, sushi in Japan, hamburghers in Hamburgh... 0:13:28.000,0:13:34.000 and at the Vatican I learned to peel Popeatoes 0:13:34.000,0:13:45.000 I'm also a prepared babysitter so that you don't worry about disciplining your kids! 0:13:45.000,0:13:50.000 - She's the one 0:13:50.000,0:13:54.000 - Wait! There's one more 0:13:54.000,0:14:08.000 - Our second one sweeps like this! 0:14:08.000,0:14:22.000 - She got all 10s! 0:14:22.000,0:14:24.000 - She hasn't even shown anything! 0:14:24.000,0:14:27.000 - She can show me all she wants later 0:14:27.000,0:14:28.000 - Ludovico! 0:14:28.000,0:14:31.000 - I meant her resume 0:14:31.000,0:14:32.000 - She looks completely useless 0:14:32.000,0:14:34.000 - So? 0:14:34.000,0:14:36.000 - She can't even grasp the broom properly! 0:14:36.000,0:14:38.000 - So? 0:14:38.000,0:14:41.000 - She can't even speak! 0:14:41.000,0:14:45.000 - Better that way mom, you don't like anyone talking back 0:14:45.000,0:14:49.000 - Do you or do you not want a maid? 0:14:49.000,0:14:51.000 - I do! 0:14:51.000,0:14:58.000 - Careful Federica, this is one of those brainless girls he sees at the stripping clubs 0:14:58.000,0:15:02.000 Of course my Flavio would not even look at her! 0:15:02.000,0:15:08.000 - Do you or do you not want a maid? 0:15:08.000,0:15:10.000 - Doesn't seem trustworthy 0:15:10.000,0:15:13.000 What if she steals from us? 0:15:13.000,0:15:18.000 - I'll watch her even in the shower! 0:15:18.000,0:15:22.000 - We have a tie here! 0:15:22.000,0:15:23.000 - It's my turn, my turn! 0:15:23.000,0:15:30.000 - Be quiet!! 0:15:30.000,0:15:39.000 - Silence! This is an important decision for the P.Lush Family. Take it seriously 0:15:39.000,0:15:42.000 - That's right, daughter. 0:15:42.000,0:15:46.000 - You can divorce your husband any time 0:15:46.000,0:15:49.000 but a good maid should be with you for life 0:15:49.000,0:15:59.000 - Grandma is right, mommy. Let's finish this and hire the mute girl 0:15:59.000,0:16:01.000 - Why the mute one? 0:16:01.000,0:16:06.000 When I'm yelling, you always say I should be a mute boy 0:16:06.000,0:16:09.000 - That's the best decision 0:16:09.000,0:16:14.000 Besides, remember that you didn't finish nursing Ludoviquito 0:16:14.000,0:16:16.000 - Never! 0:16:16.000,0:16:20.000 - We'll hire Ms. Azalea. She's better prepared 0:16:20.000,0:16:24.000 and she will make the kids change for the better 0:16:24.000,0:16:26.000 - Look mom, I'll be honest. 0:16:26.000,0:16:34.000 I won't change just because you hire a grumpy, bulldog-faced old woman 0:16:34.000,0:16:39.000 - I decide in this home and I'll decide who the maid will be 0:16:39.000,0:16:46.000 - But I'm the one who makes the worst mess, so I decide 0:16:46.000,0:16:50.000 - But I've had diarrhea for 3 days and that's why... 0:16:50.000,0:16:53.000 wait, that's not related to this 0:16:53.000,0:16:56.000 - Why don't you flip a coin? 0:16:56.000,0:17:02.000 - You're right, I'll flip in bed with the mute girl and I'll be right back 0:17:02.000,0:17:07.000 - I meant flip a coin in the air and if you win, then you decide 0:17:07.000,0:17:11.000 If I win twice, can I flip with two girls? 0:17:11.000,0:17:16.000 - No, I meant that you flip a coin, not that you flip in... 0:17:16.000,0:17:18.000 - Enough, here's the coin 0:17:18.000,0:17:20.000 -Heads 0:17:20.000,0:17:22.000 - I'll choose the breast 0:17:22.000,0:17:45.000 I meant tails. I got confused 0:17:45.000,0:18:00.000 - Ludovico will choose the new maid 0:18:00.000,0:18:02.000 - We all agree? 0:18:02.000,0:18:05.000 The brainless mute girl 0:18:05.000,0:18:12.000 Let me remind you all that the decision cannot be overturned 0:18:12.000,0:18:13.000 and cannot be changed 0:18:13.000,0:18:20.000 - The winner is...the brainless! 0:18:20.000,0:18:23.000 - I don't like to be called "brainless" 0:18:23.000,0:18:30.000 but if that means getting the job, I'll forgive you this time 0:18:30.000,0:18:33.000 - The decision cannot be changed 0:18:33.000,0:18:39.000 - You're hired. Welcome the brainless one!! 0:18:39.000,0:18:42.000 - I wasn't referring to her 0:18:42.000,0:18:45.000 I was talking about the other brainless 0:18:45.000,0:18:52.000 - I'll make dinner 0:18:52.000,0:19:06.000 - Thanks for coming, we have a maid 0:19:06.000,0:19:11.000 - Don't be sad, Dad. We fell but our pride stands still 0:19:11.000,0:19:14.000 - Thanks for your words of support, baby 0:19:14.000,0:19:17.000 But it's not fair! 0:19:17.000,0:19:20.000 -C'mon dad, get over it 0:19:20.000,0:19:25.000 - I was so close to her 0:19:25.000,0:19:29.000 - What's this? What's this Federica? 0:19:29.000,0:19:31.000 - Dinner, I guess. 0:19:31.000,0:19:36.000 - Don't worry boss, I promise I'll learn to cook in 6-7 months 0:19:36.000,0:19:40.000 6-7 months?? 0:19:40.000,0:19:46.000 - Honey, first she needs to learn to wash, clean up, ironing 0:19:46.000,0:19:49.000 - Don't be so impatient with her 0:19:49.000,0:20:10.000 - I was so close! 0:20:10.000,0:20:20.000 - "Ludovico: I'll appreciate it if you could send me a couple of sugar cups with my new maid." -Flavio 0:20:20.000,0:20:27.000 Son of a... 0:20:27.000,0:20:57.000 I was so close! 0:20:57.000,0:21:02.000 Don't leave, please! 0:21:02.000,0:21:06.000 There's something left here