WEBVTT

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Guess what happened?

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What I felt was in the cards.

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The Marble Faun is moving in.

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He just gave us the washing machine.

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That cements the deal.

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I can't bear it, I'm telling you.

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[Roiling piano]

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[Sings] It's my mother's house

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in my mother's name

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and you can't beat mother

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at mother's game.

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'Cause she likes the people

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who I don't like,

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and if I don't like it,

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it's "take a hike!"

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Which is mother's way

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of reminding me

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when you live off mother,

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you can't be free.

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And, I think that mother
is very mean,

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and this latest thing,

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with this washing machine,

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the one Jerry brought...

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don't be too surprised

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if a guy moves in,

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and I'm pulverized.

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'Cause I'll be damned

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if I'm gonna waste my time

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washing clothes

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in a [bleep] machine.

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[Piano flourish]

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[Spoken] I feel very strongly
about mementos.

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Memorabilia, I guess you call it.

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[Sweetly sings] Around the world

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is what I call

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my wall of

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special things.

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Around the world

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with rose bouquets,

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I dried, and tied

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on strings.

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A silver mask

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from a masquerade.

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Around and round

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I twirl.

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You tack them up

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so you can twirrrrl

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around the worrrrrld.

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[Piano intensifies]

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It's my mother's house

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with my mother's friends

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and with Jerry coming

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it never ends.

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It's the same old story

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as George Gould Strong.

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Not in twenty years

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did we get along!

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Though I do feel bad

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about the way he died:

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in a two-bit fleabag,

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a suicide.

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It was mother's money,

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the Bouviers.

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And if mother spends it

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in crazy ways,

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no one else took care of her,

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only me!

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She was taken care of!

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Not sexually.

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And if you infer

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that they were using her,

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I will shove you under

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the [bleep] bed.

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[Piano flourish]

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[Sweetly sings]

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Around the world

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with stones and shells

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the nicest one I lost.

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Around the world

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without a boat,

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or just a quote from Frost.

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"Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,"

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A lovely crossing on.

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Around the world,

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the world around

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the attic wall.

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Around the worrrrld

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there isn't room

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for every special thing.

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Around the world,

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you choose a few

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to make the music sing.

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A silver mask

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from a masquerade,

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around and round

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I twirl.

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You tack them up,

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so when you go,

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the world will be

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the one you know.

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A bird cage I plan to hang;

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I'll get to that

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some day.

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A bird cage

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for a bird

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who flew awayyyy.

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Around the world.

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[Sweet piano]

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[Applause]