[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:00.00,0:00:02.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What's up cinephiles,\NI'm Evasive,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:02.38,0:00:05.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and this piece of paper right here\Nmeans two things:
Dialogue: 0,0:00:05.77,0:00:08.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Number one, I am tens of\Nthousands of
Dialogue: 0,0:00:08.51,0:00:09.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,dollars in debt,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:09.82,0:00:13.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and number two, I know a lot\Nabout movies.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:13.14,0:00:16.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and since the U.S government\Nisn't giving me any debt relief this year,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:16.91,0:00:19.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I have no choice now but to\Ntorture myself on the Internet
Dialogue: 0,0:00:19.67,0:00:21.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for money to pay off the loans
Dialogue: 0,0:00:21.65,0:00:23.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I took out to go to film school.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:23.92,0:00:26.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So for this video, I watched every\Nmovie that's ever won
Dialogue: 0,0:00:26.57,0:00:29.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a Razzie Award for Worst Picture\Nof the Year.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:29.01,0:00:31.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This was an extremely painful\Nexperience
Dialogue: 0,0:00:31.20,0:00:33.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I regretted my decision\Nimmediately,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:33.26,0:00:35.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but for the sake of \Nmy adoring fans
Dialogue: 0,0:00:35.37,0:00:36.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and my bank account,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:36.41,0:00:38.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I went ahead and watched \Nall 46 of these
Dialogue: 0,0:00:38.55,0:00:40.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,movies so I could \Nexplain them to you.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:40.37,0:00:43.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But after the grueling experience\Nof watching all these movies,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:43.32,0:00:45.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not about to tackle this\Nbreakdown alone.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:45.25,0:00:47.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I went ahead and roped in\Nanother video essay girly
Dialogue: 0,0:00:47.83,0:00:49.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and a talking trash can
Dialogue: 0,0:00:49.03,0:00:51.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to help explain some of these\Nmovies for me.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:53.21,0:00:54.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But before I get to the movies,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:54.77,0:00:56.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,let me explain what the Razzies are.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:59.81,0:01:02.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Golden Raspberry Awards are\Nan annual event,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:02.47,0:01:04.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,usually held the night before the Oscars,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:04.58,0:01:07.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to give out awards for the worst\Nmovies of the year.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:07.20,0:01:09.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was founded by Hollywood\Ncopywriter
Dialogue: 0,0:01:09.06,0:01:11.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,John Wilson and editor Maureen\NMurphy.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:11.39,0:01:13.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The idea for the Razzies came\Nabout in 1980
Dialogue: 0,0:01:13.82,0:01:17.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when Wilson saw Can't Stop \Nthe Music and Xanadu, back to back
Dialogue: 0,0:01:17.71,0:01:20.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and hated them both so much, he thought\Nthere ought to be an award show
Dialogue: 0,0:01:20.84,0:01:21.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for this type of thing.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:21.96,0:01:23.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Months later, Wilson hosted an
Dialogue: 0,0:01:23.46,0:01:25.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oscars watch party at his house,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:25.36,0:01:27.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and after the Oscars had finished,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:27.41,0:01:29.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he and Murphy passed out ballots\Nto everyone at the party
Dialogue: 0,0:01:29.94,0:01:31.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to vote on the worst movies of the year,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:31.58,0:01:34.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then he announced the\Nwinners in his living room.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:34.07,0:01:36.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Over time, the ceremony \Ngrew and grew,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:36.01,0:01:39.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and today they're considered a staple \Nof the Hollywood award season
Dialogue: 0,0:01:39.24,0:01:41.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as a low-budget Bizarro World\NOscars
Dialogue: 0,0:01:41.38,0:01:43.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that distributes awards in\Ncategories
Dialogue: 0,0:01:43.35,0:01:45.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,such as Worst Actor, Worst Director,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:45.52,0:01:46.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and Worst Screenplay.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:46.95,0:01:49.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Unlike the qualifications for voting\Nat the Oscars though,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:49.63,0:01:51.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,becoming a Razzie voter \Nis very easy:
Dialogue: 0,0:01:51.83,0:01:53.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,either be friends with \None of the producers
Dialogue: 0,0:01:53.92,0:01:56.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or just pay a $40 membership fee.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:56.36,0:01:58.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's all it takes.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:58.10,0:01:59.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So that's the story of the Razzies.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:59.78,0:02:02.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now are you ready to learn about\Nevery single movie
Dialogue: 0,0:02:02.21,0:02:03.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that won Worst Picture?
Dialogue: 0,0:02:04.84,0:02:05.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because I wasn't.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:05.99,0:02:08.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's 46 of these things, so I'm\Ngoing to talk about each one
Dialogue: 0,0:02:08.80,0:02:10.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for just a minute or two
Dialogue: 0,0:02:10.05,0:02:11.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and hand off a few to my guests
Dialogue: 0,0:02:11.54,0:02:13.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so I don't completely lose my mind here.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:13.54,0:02:16.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Also, I put a content warning on a\Nbunch of these movies
Dialogue: 0,0:02:16.22,0:02:18.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because of the sensitive subject\Nmatter I discuss.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:18.60,0:02:22.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not trying to traumatize anybody\Nbut myself in this video.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:22.69,0:02:24.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, me and my guests.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:25.11,0:02:27.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I commissioned them for this,\Nso it-it's fine.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:37.51,0:02:40.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Anybody who swallows two snowballs \Nand a ding-dong shouldn't"
Dialogue: 0,0:02:40.50,0:02:41.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"have trouble with pride."
Dialogue: 0,0:02:41.72,0:02:45.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The first movie to win Worst Picture was \NCan't Stop The Music,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:45.21,0:02:49.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,A movie about the "origins"\Nof the disco group Village People.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:49.21,0:02:53.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I say origins in air-quotes because\Nthe Village People play themselves
Dialogue: 0,0:02:53.68,0:02:55.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the plot is completely made-up
Dialogue: 0,0:02:55.67,0:02:58.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and not at all how the Village People\Nactually formed
Dialogue: 0,0:02:58.35,0:03:02.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The movie itself is super campy\Nand full of these crazy musical numbers
Dialogue: 0,0:03:02.07,0:03:03.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that are unironically kinda great.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:03.93,0:03:07.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's just too bad that in between\Nthose musical numbers are these scenes
Dialogue: 0,0:03:07.46,0:03:10.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with really terrible acting \Nthat go on for way too long.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:10.74,0:03:15.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[movie] -Wait a minute! I am not taking one\N-more step 'til I know where I'm going.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:15.76,0:03:19.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,-Yeah, quit my job, and you\N-got me walking the beat again!
Dialogue: 0,0:03:19.42,0:03:22.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I'm not even getting paid for it!\N- Hold your horses.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:22.19,0:03:24.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,-I told you I had a surprise for you.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:24.00,0:03:26.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,-I hope so. I turned in my\N-coin change with the toll booth.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:26.72,0:03:30.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its not that awful of a movie, but by 1980 \Nthe disco fad was pretty much over and
Dialogue: 0,0:03:30.78,0:03:33.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,people loved to hate on\Ndisco music at the time
Dialogue: 0,0:03:33.05,0:03:35.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so you can see why this\Nended up being such a huge bomb.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:35.74,0:03:40.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Also, shockingly, this movie marks the\Nfirst film appearance of Caitlyn Jenner
Dialogue: 0,0:03:40.03,0:03:42.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and apparently the experience was so bad
Dialogue: 0,0:03:42.31,0:03:45.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,she didn't appear in a movie again until\NJack & Jill in 2011.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:45.83,0:03:49.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And, uh, well.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:56.40,0:03:58.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Mommie Dearest is a "biopic"
Dialogue: 0,0:03:58.64,0:04:02.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,about the life of actress Joan Crawford's\Nadopted daughter Christina.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:02.54,0:04:06.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and again, I say biopic in air-quotes\Nbecause the movie was based on
Dialogue: 0,0:04:06.74,0:04:08.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Christina Crawford's controversial memoir
Dialogue: 0,0:04:08.94,0:04:12.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that other members of Joan Crawford's\Nfamily disavowed when it came out.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:12.45,0:04:14.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I haven't done much research on the topic
Dialogue: 0,0:04:14.47,0:04:16.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so I'm in no position\Nto question this story.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:16.85,0:04:18.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I will say that after\Nthe movie was made
Dialogue: 0,0:04:18.92,0:04:23.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Christina said the film was grotesque\Nand not true to her memoir.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:23.03,0:04:26.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Released just 4 years after\NJoan Crawford passed away,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:26.46,0:04:29.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this movie basically spits all over\Nher fresh grave
Dialogue: 0,0:04:29.73,0:04:31.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and portrays her as a horrible mother
Dialogue: 0,0:04:31.51,0:04:34.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who frequently, physically and emotionally\Nabused her daughter.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:34.89,0:04:38.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,now whether or not this is actually true\Nis still a matter for debate of course.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:38.29,0:04:41.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Regardless of the real-life circumstances\Nbehind the movie,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:41.64,0:04:44.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Faye Dunway's performance\Nof Joan Crawford is iconic now.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:44.87,0:04:48.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,People who have unfortunately experienced \Nemotional abuse from a parent
Dialogue: 0,0:04:48.27,0:04:51.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,found her performance\Nscarily true to their own life experiences
Dialogue: 0,0:04:51.28,0:04:53.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but general audiences thought\Nshe was just being
Dialogue: 0,0:04:53.84,0:04:56.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,outrageously campy and \Nover the top the whole movie.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:56.42,0:04:57.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because of its reputation
Dialogue: 0,0:04:57.66,0:05:00.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the film accidentally\Nbecame a queer cult classic over the years
Dialogue: 0,0:05:00.80,0:05:02.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,especially in the drag community.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:02.72,0:05:05.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and it was even featured in the most\Nrecent season of RuPaul's Drag Race.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:05.97,0:05:10.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"No wire hangers!"
Dialogue: 0,0:05:10.78,0:05:14.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,♫ No more wire hangers ♫\N♫ Ah, ah! ♫
Dialogue: 0,0:05:14.21,0:05:18.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,♫ No, no, wire hangers ♫\N♫ No, no, no, no ♫
Dialogue: 0,0:05:24.32,0:05:27.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Evasive] Inchon is a movie about\Nthe battle of Incheon in the Korean War.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:27.88,0:05:30.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was financed and produced\Nby the Unification Church,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:30.49,0:05:34.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a movement that was and still is\Nconsidered a dangerous cult
Dialogue: 0,0:05:34.03,0:05:37.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with a leader who called himself\Nthe second coming of Jesus Christ.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:37.24,0:05:40.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The film's producer was\Na very wealthy member of the church.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:40.07,0:05:42.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who said he was instructed by God\Nto make the film.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:42.56,0:05:45.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, unsurprisingly, no investors wanted\Nany part of this.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:45.94,0:05:51.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and all 46 million dollars of the budget ended up\Nbeing provided by the church and its followers.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:51.48,0:05:55.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The film itself doesn't really have much\Nto do with the Unification Church.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:55.17,0:05:58.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a straightforward war movie that's\Njust boring and unremarkable.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:58.84,0:06:03.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It had some star power but only because\Nthe actors in it were paid a lot of money.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:03.04,0:06:06.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with Laurence Olivier even admitting\Nbefore the movie was released
Dialogue: 0,0:06:06.12,0:06:08.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that he was only in it for the money.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:08.30,0:06:11.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was such a flop that nobody even\Nbothered to release it on home media.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:11.50,0:06:13.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the only available version\Nof the movie today
Dialogue: 0,0:06:13.77,0:06:17.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is from an old VHS rip from when it\Nplayed on Unification Church TV channel.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:17.50,0:06:21.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The only thing worth seeing in this movie\Nis Laurence Olivier's makeup job.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:21.04,0:06:22.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean he looks like the Joker.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:29.94,0:06:31.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This movie is just tasteless.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:31.44,0:06:33.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's based on a novel by Harold Robbins
Dialogue: 0,0:06:33.67,0:06:36.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who was paid 600 000 dollars\Nfor the film rights,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:36.63,0:06:38.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and apparently fell asleep\Nin the screening room,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:38.76,0:06:40.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and never actually watched the movie.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:40.58,0:06:42.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,First of all, in the first 15 minutes,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:42.78,0:06:45.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,young Ray Liotta,\Nin his first ever movie role,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:45.86,0:06:48.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,sexually assaults the main character\Nwith a garden hose.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:49.04,0:06:52.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then after that the rest of the movie\Nis just her being forced to have sex
Dialogue: 0,0:06:52.53,0:06:55.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with gross older men\Nin order to get ahead in Hollywood.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:55.18,0:06:57.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And you see all of it.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:57.09,0:06:59.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It seems like it was trying to criticize\Nsexism in Hollywood
Dialogue: 0,0:06:59.93,0:07:02.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but instead of handling it with\Nany kind of nuance or respect
Dialogue: 0,0:07:02.46,0:07:04.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the movie fully shows the sex scenes
Dialogue: 0,0:07:04.39,0:07:06.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and does the very thing\Nit's trying to critique.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:06.63,0:07:10.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The final scene in the movie shows\Nher winning an Oscar for Best Screenplay
Dialogue: 0,0:07:10.16,0:07:12.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and calling out the men\Nwho took advantage of her
Dialogue: 0,0:07:12.46,0:07:13.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in her acceptance speech.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:13.70,0:07:17.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then she's booed off stage, and leaves,\Nand the movie just ends there.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:17.63,0:07:20.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's really uncomfortable to watch.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:22.38,0:07:24.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But somehow the next movie is even worse.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:30.07,0:07:34.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ugh, god, ok. soo..
Dialogue: 0,0:07:34.31,0:07:36.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Bolero is a movie by John Derek.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:36.25,0:07:38.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,John Derek is—\N(groan)
Dialogue: 0,0:07:39.59,0:07:41.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,John Derek was an old Hollywood actor
Dialogue: 0,0:07:41.66,0:07:45.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who appeared in supporting roles in\Nseveral big movies in the 1940s and 50s.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:45.72,0:07:48.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In 1973 when Derek was 47 years old,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:48.48,0:07:51.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he traveled to Europe to direct\Na low-budget movie called
Dialogue: 0,0:07:51.06,0:07:53.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Once upon a Love" starring\Na 16 year old girl named
Dialogue: 0,0:07:53.73,0:07:55.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Mary Cathleen Collins".
Dialogue: 0,0:07:55.60,0:07:58.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,During the production—\N(retching)
Dialogue: 0,0:07:58.67,0:08:00.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm sorry. I'm so sorry
Dialogue: 0,0:08:00.02,0:08:02.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,During the production, \NJohn Derek left his wife
Dialogue: 0,0:08:02.27,0:08:05.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and groomed Mary Collins\Ninto a sexual relationship,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:05.19,0:08:08.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,With the two staying in Europe\Nuntil she turned 18
Dialogue: 0,0:08:08.19,0:08:10.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so he could avoid \Nstatutory rape charges.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:10.57,0:08:15.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When they got married a few years later,\Nshe changed her name to Bo Derek
Dialogue: 0,0:08:15.00,0:08:19.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and proceeded to star in all of his movies\Nuntil he died in 1998.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:19.38,0:08:22.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(retching)\N(vomit squelching)
Dialogue: 0,0:08:22.16,0:08:23.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm sorry.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:23.11,0:08:26.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So anyway, Bolero was a movie\Nabout a young woman fresh from college
Dialogue: 0,0:08:26.59,0:08:29.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who travels to Morocco in Spain\Nto lose her virginity.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:29.94,0:08:31.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and If that wasn't bad enough,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:31.66,0:08:35.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this movie features a full-frontal\Nnudity scene with a 14 year old girl.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:36.06,0:08:39.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not an actress playing a 14 year old girl.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:39.09,0:08:41.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,An actual 14 year old girl.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:41.86,0:08:45.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(retching, vomit squelching)\N(coughing)
Dialogue: 0,0:08:52.75,0:08:54.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you've never seen any\NRambo movies before
Dialogue: 0,0:08:54.87,0:08:57.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the image you probably associate\Nwith the word "Rambo"
Dialogue: 0,0:08:57.68,0:09:00.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is the one where\Nhypermasculine Sylvester Stallone
Dialogue: 0,0:09:00.39,0:09:02.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is firing a machine gun\Nwithout a shirt on.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:02.59,0:09:06.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But see, that's actually from this movie,\N"Rambo First Blood: Part II",
Dialogue: 0,0:09:06.57,0:09:09.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which has very little to do\Nwith Part 1 at all.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:09.09,0:09:11.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The whole point of\Nthe first Rambo movie is that
Dialogue: 0,0:09:11.54,0:09:14.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Rambo was a Vietnam War veteran\Nwith severe PTSD
Dialogue: 0,0:09:14.90,0:09:18.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who snaps and kills a bunch of\Nsmall-town cops who treat him like shit.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:18.46,0:09:19.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This sequel, on the other hand
Dialogue: 0,0:09:20.01,0:09:23.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,throws that tragic anti-war character\Nout the window
Dialogue: 0,0:09:23.40,0:09:26.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as the US government sends him\Nback to Vietnam
Dialogue: 0,0:09:26.01,0:09:27.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to locate prisoners of war
Dialogue: 0,0:09:27.90,0:09:30.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and Rambo is just like weirdly ok with that.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:30.61,0:09:32.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's like he immediately got over his PTSD
Dialogue: 0,0:09:32.84,0:09:35.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and just got straight to blowing stuff up,\Nno problem.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:35.48,0:09:37.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This movie was\Na massive box office success
Dialogue: 0,0:09:37.72,0:09:39.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and made double of what\Nthe first movie made,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:39.84,0:09:43.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so naturally, Rambo III also ditched\Nthe anti-war angle
Dialogue: 0,0:09:43.06,0:09:44.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and sent Rambo to Afghanistan.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:44.94,0:09:47.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I dunno as someone who thought\Nthe first movie was amazing,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:47.66,0:09:51.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it really sucks to see how quickly\Nthey ruined this character.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:51.03,0:09:52.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But, like, I get it.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:52.53,0:09:54.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The people who went to go see\Nthese sequels in theaters
Dialogue: 0,0:09:54.96,0:09:56.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,didn't watch it for the plot.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:56.53,0:09:58.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They watched to see \NSylvester Stallone do this.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:58.94,0:10:07.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(bow twang)\N(explosion)
Dialogue: 0,0:10:13.94,0:10:16.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In the early 80s, \NPrince was a rising star.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:16.66,0:10:18.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And his stardom was cemented in 1984
Dialogue: 0,0:10:18.89,0:10:21.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with the massive hit that was Purple Rain.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:21.00,0:10:22.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so after the success of Purple Rain,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:22.64,0:10:27.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Warner Bros. told Prince he was basically allowed to\Ndo whatever he wanted for his next project
Dialogue: 0,0:10:27.37,0:10:30.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,greenlighting Under the Cherry Moon\Nwithout even reading the script
Dialogue: 0,0:10:30.17,0:10:33.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the story is, Prince plays a guy in \Nthe French Rivier named Christopher
Dialogue: 0,0:10:33.55,0:10:36.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He and his friend (tricky) try to \Nscam a rich girl out of her inheritance
Dialogue: 0,0:10:36.36,0:10:38.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but they both end up \Nfalling in love with her.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:38.56,0:10:40.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,problems with the movie became apparent early on
Dialogue: 0,0:10:40.83,0:10:43.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when Prince hired someone with \Nno experience to write the script.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:43.94,0:10:46.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Then 16 days into filming, \Nthe director quit.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:46.42,0:10:50.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And Prince took over even though he had\Nno experience directing a movie before.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:50.36,0:10:53.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The end result was a movie that features\Nwhat I can only describe as
Dialogue: 0,0:10:54.88,0:10:56.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,{\i1}sarcastically says{\i0} Acting.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:56.43,0:10:59.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Don't try anything funny.\NNot this time, Christopher.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:59.79,0:11:03.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want the money or I throw\Nyou both out onto the street.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:06.30,0:11:07.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(gasp)
Dialogue: 0,0:11:07.26,0:11:09.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's right, [inaudible]
Dialogue: 0,0:11:13.03,0:11:14.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Throw me on the the street?
Dialogue: 0,0:11:14.64,0:11:17.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's bizarre, it's one of \Nthose movies where
Dialogue: 0,0:11:17.16,0:11:19.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the acting is so bad \Nit loops around to being funny
Dialogue: 0,0:11:19.68,0:11:22.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which has given it\Na bit of a cult following over the years
Dialogue: 0,0:11:22.58,0:11:24.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that and the soundtrack is amazing
Dialogue: 0,0:11:24.31,0:11:25.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like with Purple Rain
Dialogue: 0,0:11:25.49,0:11:28.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Prince released an album with the movie\Nthat went Platinum
Dialogue: 0,0:11:28.21,0:11:31.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and is today remembered as \None of his most iconic albums of his career
Dialogue: 0,0:11:31.44,0:11:34.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,After Under the Cherry Moon failed, \NPrince tried one more time
Dialogue: 0,0:11:34.40,0:11:36.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to direct a feature-length movie
Dialogue: 0,0:11:36.08,0:11:38.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but that one got nominated \Nfor a bunch of Razzies too
Dialogue: 0,0:11:38.60,0:11:41.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and after that he gave up and \Nnever tried to direct a movie again.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:41.56,0:11:44.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Also this here marks \Nthe first ever tie in Razzies history
Dialogue: 0,0:11:44.67,0:11:46.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with Under the Cherry Moon tieing with
Dialogue: 0,0:11:46.98,0:11:49.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughing)
Dialogue: 0,0:11:49.16,0:11:50.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Howard the Duck.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:00.29,0:12:11.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Evasive laughing)
Dialogue: 0,0:12:11.08,0:12:16.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Greetings, Evasive viewers, \Nit is I, young Junko, expert in Bird Law
Dialogue: 0,0:12:16.57,0:12:19.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I'm here to defend \Nmy client Howard T. Duck,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:19.64,0:12:23.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,star of the Razzies' Worst Film of 1986, \NHoward The Duck
Dialogue: 0,0:12:23.64,0:12:26.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,For nearly the last 40 years \Nmy client's reputation has been
Dialogue: 0,0:12:26.83,0:12:28.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,tarnished and slandered against
Dialogue: 0,0:12:28.48,0:12:32.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,by quack punch, chicken shit critics \Nfor this tragic box office bomb.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:32.17,0:12:36.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Central character, the Duck, the one \Nthat we're gonna be rooting for,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:36.46,0:12:39.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he's neither funny, or bit of funny."
Dialogue: 0,0:12:39.49,0:12:41.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I'm here to clear the air.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:41.14,0:12:44.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Howard the Duck is not a movie, \Nno, it's a duckumentary.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:45.16,0:12:47.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I know this because I was there.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:47.18,0:12:48.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We all were.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:49.32,0:12:52.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My entire clan witnessed \Nmy client crash land on Earth
Dialogue: 0,0:12:52.99,0:12:55.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to star in a motion picture \Nthat of which has been
Dialogue: 0,0:12:55.82,0:12:59.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Um.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:59.30,0:13:02.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's still awful. It's bad. \NWe're not winning this case, buddy.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:02.80,0:13:04.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I wasn't trying anything. Honest!
Dialogue: 0,0:13:04.74,0:13:06.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is a strange movie to say the least.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:06.82,0:13:09.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Howard the Duck notoriously opens\Nwith 2 instances of
Dialogue: 0,0:13:09.66,0:13:12.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,full frontal duck booba\Nin the span of 30 seconds.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:14.40,0:13:16.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But the rest of the movie is this whiplash
Dialogue: 0,0:13:16.41,0:13:19.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,between what's a squeaky clean\Nfull house type family movie
Dialogue: 0,0:13:19.42,0:13:22.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that no one older than the age of\N3 years old would find funny
Dialogue: 0,0:13:22.18,0:13:25.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,followed by things like \NMarty McFly's mom showing off her ass and
Dialogue: 0,0:13:25.33,0:13:27.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,pulling out a condom for Howard's corkscrew.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:28.28,0:13:29.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Howard…
Dialogue: 0,0:13:29.35,0:13:31.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's like anti-matter Shrek where \Nthey didn't know
Dialogue: 0,0:13:31.75,0:13:34.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,how to mix adult humor \Nand a kids' flick properly yet
Dialogue: 0,0:13:34.40,0:13:37.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so it becomes this overly long \Nbland comedy
Dialogue: 0,0:13:37.21,0:13:38.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with hardly any intentional laughs
Dialogue: 0,0:13:38.85,0:13:42.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that just happens to throw in something \Ntotally obscene every now and then
Dialogue: 0,0:13:42.55,0:13:44.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- [Howard] Oh!\N- I just can't resist your
Dialogue: 0,0:13:44.82,0:13:46.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,intense animal magnetism.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:48.21,0:13:50.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,uhh there's a lot of uhh attempts at duck puns,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:50.88,0:13:54.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,most are just replacing \Na random phrase in a word with "duck"
Dialogue: 0,0:13:54.43,0:13:57.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"That's it. No more Mr. Nice Duck."
Dialogue: 0,0:13:57.86,0:14:00.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Even the director's name is Willard Hyuck.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:01.52,0:14:02.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's a duck name.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:03.78,0:14:05.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's a name you give a duck.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:05.62,0:14:08.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The first half of the movie has Howard\Npointlessly meandering
Dialogue: 0,0:14:08.68,0:14:12.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there's no funny interactions or \Nobservations or memorable bits
Dialogue: 0,0:14:12.16,0:14:15.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's just an aimless movie \Nwith the guy in the duck suit.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:15.18,0:14:17.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You have an entire portion of the movie
Dialogue: 0,0:14:17.28,0:14:19.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,where Howard has a job \Nas a towel boy in like a sex club
Dialogue: 0,0:14:19.78,0:14:21.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's fun for the whole family!
Dialogue: 0,0:14:22.32,0:14:24.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, Breeders, what the hell.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:25.31,0:14:27.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Bareback bestiality and pedophilia.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:27.94,0:14:32.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh yeah, we find Howard getting launched to earth \Nas a result of a quack mace incident.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:32.18,0:14:35.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which also leads to Palpatine \Nsomehow returning from the dead
Dialogue: 0,0:14:35.12,0:14:38.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and possessing the body of that one actor\Nthat's in every 80s movie
Dialogue: 0,0:14:38.10,0:14:40.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who would later go on to be\Narrested for being a sex pervert.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:41.02,0:14:42.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What do you think he would like to eat?
Dialogue: 0,0:14:42.92,0:14:45.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I no longer need human food.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:45.82,0:14:47.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Junko] I need little boy butts.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:47.96,0:14:50.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You have a movie where\Na talking duck fires a giant laser
Dialogue: 0,0:14:50.70,0:14:53.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,at a hell portal to stop \Na horde of alien warlords
Dialogue: 0,0:14:53.14,0:14:54.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,from taking over the Earth
Dialogue: 0,0:14:54.39,0:14:56.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and they still manage \Nto make it a total snooze fest
Dialogue: 0,0:14:56.91,0:14:58.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They try to give Howard a bit of edge
Dialogue: 0,0:14:58.67,0:15:00.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but he still feels \Ntoo kiddy and sanitized
Dialogue: 0,0:15:00.45,0:15:01.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for what they're going for
Dialogue: 0,0:15:01.72,0:15:03.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And part of that is also his design.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:03.49,0:15:05.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He looks like a cross \Nof a Furby and MacCulkin.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:05.88,0:15:07.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There were some things I did like,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:07.35,0:15:09.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like these alien overlords are pretty cool
Dialogue: 0,0:15:09.20,0:15:11.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,their design and the stop motion \Nis really well done.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:11.47,0:15:14.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the sequence where\NHoward gets shot into space
Dialogue: 0,0:15:14.00,0:15:16.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is pretty neat, pretty \Nimpressive to look at.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:16.21,0:15:19.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I like this sequence where Howard\Nand Andy Dufresne get a 6 star wanted level
Dialogue: 0,0:15:19.59,0:15:21.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and start flying away from all the cops
Dialogue: 0,0:15:21.29,0:15:22.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that was good.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:22.30,0:15:23.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, Tim Robins is in this
Dialogue: 0,0:15:23.73,0:15:26.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Imagine having what's considered \None of the best movies of all time
Dialogue: 0,0:15:26.93,0:15:28.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as part of your portfolio
Dialogue: 0,0:15:28.16,0:15:30.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and on the other end of the \Nspectrum, Howard the Duck,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:30.78,0:15:31.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,now that's range
Dialogue: 0,0:15:31.77,0:15:35.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Genuinely I was taken aback \Nbecause some of the shots in this movie
Dialogue: 0,0:15:35.15,0:15:36.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,undeniably do go hard. I feel like
Dialogue: 0,0:15:36.80,0:15:40.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's a version of this movie that \Ncould've actually been good with less work
Dialogue: 0,0:15:40.40,0:15:44.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like if they leaned into Howard being this\Ncynical, perverted wise-quacking duck
Dialogue: 0,0:15:44.18,0:15:46.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that's down on his luck,\Nwho gets thrust into Earth
Dialogue: 0,0:15:46.28,0:15:48.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and finds this strange new realm
Dialogue: 0,0:15:48.00,0:15:49.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,actually isn't so much different from his own.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:49.92,0:15:52.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then it's all about the bills, \Nbaby, put it on my belt
Dialogue: 0,0:15:52.36,0:15:55.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He could take it as an \Nopportunity for a fresh start,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:55.68,0:15:57.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,slowly climbing his way up the corporate ladder
Dialogue: 0,0:15:57.44,0:15:59.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,until becoming a national celebrity
Dialogue: 0,0:15:59.14,0:16:01.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that gets caught up in 80s \Nconsumerism and greed
Dialogue: 0,0:16:01.17,0:16:04.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then maybe having him begrudgingly\Ninvolved in weird sci-fi fantasy stuff
Dialogue: 0,0:16:04.71,0:16:05.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like the comics, I dunno.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:05.91,0:16:08.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not sure how to defend my client.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:08.00,0:16:08.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Give him the chair.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:09.58,0:16:10.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Howard screams)
Dialogue: 0,0:16:19.04,0:16:28.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Evasive laughing)
Dialogue: 0,0:16:29.24,0:16:32.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Alright, I may not have been \Nable to defend Howard,
Dialogue: 0,0:16:32.44,0:16:36.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but know this: from this day forth, \NI will ensure every client of mine
Dialogue: 0,0:16:36.50,0:16:37.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is proven innocent.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:38.33,0:16:41.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now for my next client, \NI will be defending one Bill Cos-.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:41.98,0:16:42.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Bill Co-Bill Cosby.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:46.40,0:16:47.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Bill Co-Bill Cosby.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:47.88,0:16:50.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I-I'm good. Your Honor? i with-I withdrawal.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:50.98,0:16:53.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I withdrawal your honor. I'm good. We're done here. We're done.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:53.92,0:16:57.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's Leonard, part 6.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:57.32,0:16:59.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ask anyone who's seen\Nthis movie, they'll tell you
Dialogue: 0,0:16:59.65,0:17:02.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that's when they first knew \Nlil' Bill was a real piece of shit
Dialogue: 0,0:17:02.14,0:17:06.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I got to say when I first heard there was a\Ncomedy movie that just started on part 6
Dialogue: 0,0:17:06.17,0:17:10.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I thought hey, that's kind funny, maybe this movie\Ncould be bad in a good way, at the very least
Dialogue: 0,0:17:10.50,0:17:14.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Nope, it's just bad, \Nit's boring, it's so boring.
Dialogue: 0,0:17:14.85,0:17:17.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If there's one thing Cosby \Nwas always a master at
Dialogue: 0,0:17:17.22,0:17:18.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's making people very sleepy.
Dialogue: 0,0:17:19.09,0:17:22.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The whole thing is supposed to be \Na spoof on the spy genre, sort of like
Dialogue: 0,0:17:22.04,0:17:25.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like Naked Gun, except it actually\Ncame out a year before that movie
Dialogue: 0,0:17:25.53,0:17:29.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They really just had the cameras rolling \Nand had Bill Cosby do whatever he wanted
Dialogue: 0,0:17:29.28,0:17:31.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's a bunch of weird sex shit
Dialogue: 0,0:17:31.51,0:17:33.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean the clues are all there,
Dialogue: 0,0:17:33.02,0:17:36.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in the movie his wife divorced him\Nbecause he slept with a 19 year old
Dialogue: 0,0:17:36.31,0:17:40.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and his daughter is dating a much older man\Nto further her career as an actress
Dialogue: 0,0:17:40.31,0:17:42.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so then Leonard has to see her \Nflash her tits on stage
Dialogue: 0,0:17:42.84,0:17:46.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for no reason, none of these scenes \Nadd anything to the movie
Dialogue: 0,0:17:46.13,0:17:48.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think Cosby just wanted to\Nlook at some young girl tits
Dialogue: 0,0:17:48.54,0:17:51.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The whole film has this weird\Nlethargic and slow energy to it
Dialogue: 0,0:17:51.88,0:17:54.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Everything from the dialogue\Nto the editing,
Dialogue: 0,0:17:54.12,0:17:56.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's like watching a movie at 0.5 speed.
Dialogue: 0,0:17:56.54,0:17:58.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The movie opens with \NLeonard and an assassin
Dialogue: 0,0:17:58.64,0:18:00.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,having a shootout in a kitchen
Dialogue: 0,0:18:00.31,0:18:03.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The joke is that what they're doing \Nis actually helping prep some of the food
Dialogue: 0,0:18:03.60,0:18:07.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ok, could be funny but the pace of it all\Nis so bizarrely off by a step
Dialogue: 0,0:18:07.88,0:18:11.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Every gag and bit is like this, \Nlike they took something that was
Dialogue: 0,0:18:11.28,0:18:14.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,maybe a 3 out of 10 joke at best\Nand spread it so thin that
Dialogue: 0,0:18:14.55,0:18:15.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you-you ask yourself,
Dialogue: 0,0:18:15.98,0:18:18.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Was there even \Na joke at all to begin with?
Dialogue: 0,0:18:18.04,0:18:20.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The plot follows Leonard \Nbeing the best agent in the world
Dialogue: 0,0:18:20.63,0:18:23.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who's long been retired, until being\Npulled back for one last mission
Dialogue: 0,0:18:23.57,0:18:26.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,after a buncha animals under\Nmind control start killing people
Dialogue: 0,0:18:26.42,0:18:28.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,yet again a god-awful 80s comedy starts
Dialogue: 0,0:18:28.42,0:18:30.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,off with an animal looking at a porno mag.
Dialogue: 0,0:18:30.42,0:18:31.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Here's you two fucking nickels.
Dialogue: 0,0:18:31.88,0:18:34.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The first half is him just \Nstumbling around
Dialogue: 0,0:18:34.39,0:18:36.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,trying to get back with his ex wife
Dialogue: 0,0:18:36.16,0:18:39.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who pours soup on him—\Nwh-what is this gag?
Dialogue: 0,0:18:39.22,0:18:42.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Is this a fetish, Mr. Cosby?\NYou think this was genuinely funny?
Dialogue: 0,0:18:42.36,0:18:46.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[mocking] We'll have him pour soup.
Dialogue: 0,0:18:46.56,0:18:49.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Cosby doesn't have a single \Nfunny line or hook to his character
Dialogue: 0,0:18:49.59,0:18:52.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you can tell he's put \Nzero effort into any of this
Dialogue: 0,0:18:52.14,0:18:55.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's almost like he said "Yeah I'll do the movie \Nbut I don't wanna look too stupid,
Dialogue: 0,0:18:55.14,0:18:56.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,don't make me look too stupid
Dialogue: 0,0:18:56.78,0:19:00.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,most of these so-called jokes are what the most\Nboring uptight person in the world
Dialogue: 0,0:19:00.73,0:19:02.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,would think being silly is.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:02.36,0:19:05.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[mocking] Oh, look, wow \Nhe's being a ballerina, so girly.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:05.82,0:19:10.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, wow, he's doing a silly fitness tape, \Nhow can he subject himself to that.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:10.14,0:19:11.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,oh, wee, you know what I mean?
Dialogue: 0,0:19:11.85,0:19:14.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's like he thinks \Nthese things are so beneath him
Dialogue: 0,0:19:14.49,0:19:16.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that just him doing it would be funny.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:16.42,0:19:17.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What a piece of shit.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:17.92,0:19:19.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,y'know what really makes me mad, though?
Dialogue: 0,0:19:19.70,0:19:23.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's completely unfair. Because everyone\Nelse seems to be trying, but him.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:23.18,0:19:24.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there's a part In the end when Leonard
Dialogue: 0,0:19:24.64,0:19:26.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,frees all the animals from captivity,
Dialogue: 0,0:19:26.18,0:19:29.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I just wanna take this time to\Nrecognize this bird right here.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:29.09,0:19:33.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Who in this 5 second shot, bends the bars\Nof his cage with his beak and breaks free
Dialogue: 0,0:19:33.21,0:19:34.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,God bless this bird.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:34.27,0:19:37.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This bird right here put more effort\Nthan Bill Cosby in his own movie.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:37.63,0:19:41.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This bird did not deserve to be\Nin one of the worst movies of all time.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:41.12,0:19:42.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,None of these animals did.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:42.44,0:19:44.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This ostrich didn't deserve to be betrayed
Dialogue: 0,0:19:44.74,0:19:48.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with a sex criminal grinding\Nhis pudding pop on its back.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:48.18,0:19:49.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,if you think about it
Dialogue: 0,0:19:49.24,0:19:52.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If audiences in 1987 hated this, \Nwatching it now,
Dialogue: 0,0:19:52.100,0:19:56.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with all the humor naturally diluted\Neven further through the passage of time
Dialogue: 0,0:19:56.72,0:19:58.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is like drinking a 40 year old\Ncan of new coke
Dialogue: 0,0:19:58.71,0:20:00.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and when Bill's the one handing you the drink,\Nit's safe to say
Dialogue: 0,0:20:00.89,0:20:02.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you probably shouldn't drink it.
Dialogue: 0,0:20:02.38,0:20:04.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(gurgling)
Dialogue: 0,0:20:10.89,0:20:14.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Cocktail is a movie where young Tom Cruise\Nplays a bartender in Manhattan.
Dialogue: 0,0:20:14.79,0:20:17.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then he movies to Jamaica \Nand falls in love with a girl.
Dialogue: 0,0:20:17.57,0:20:20.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but then he loses her and he moves back\Nto New York to win her back
Dialogue: 0,0:20:20.18,0:20:21.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and that's pretty much it.
Dialogue: 0,0:20:21.41,0:20:23.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What you see is what you get\Nwith this one.
Dialogue: 0,0:20:23.19,0:20:24.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a really mediocre movie.
Dialogue: 0,0:20:24.88,0:20:27.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not that good, but not that bad either.
Dialogue: 0,0:20:27.23,0:20:29.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well except for this scene when\NTom Cruise stands on a bar
Dialogue: 0,0:20:29.40,0:20:31.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and reads his shitty poetry.
Dialogue: 0,0:20:31.14,0:20:32.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is pretty cringey.
Dialogue: 0,0:20:32.31,0:20:34.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[tom cruise] I see America drinking
Dialogue: 0,0:20:34.82,0:20:37.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the fabulous cocktails I make.
Dialogue: 0,0:20:37.55,0:20:38.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,{\i1}crowd laughs{\i0}
Dialogue: 0,0:20:38.94,0:20:42.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,America's getting stinking\Non something I stir or shake.
Dialogue: 0,0:20:42.16,0:20:44.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughing)
Dialogue: 0,0:20:44.46,0:20:47.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I make drinks so sweet and snazz-ay,
Dialogue: 0,0:20:47.15,0:20:49.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the iced tea, the kamikaze,
Dialogue: 0,0:20:49.82,0:20:52.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(hollering)
Dialogue: 0,0:20:52.07,0:20:57.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the sex on the beach\Nis Schnapps made from peach
Dialogue: 0,0:20:57.04,0:21:00.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the ball and hammer\Nthe Alabama slammer!
Dialogue: 0,0:21:00.50,0:21:04.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Unsurprisingly with Tom Cruise starring,\Nthis movie was a massive success,
Dialogue: 0,0:21:04.34,0:21:08.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,earning a ridiculous 171 million dollars\Non a 20 million dollar budget.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:08.96,0:21:12.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's also the movie that the Beach Boys song\N"Kokomo" song was written for.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:12.43,0:21:15.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Besides that, not much to talk about here.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:15.33,0:21:18.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm pretty sure it only won Worst Picture\Nbecause this was the same year
Dialogue: 0,0:21:18.53,0:21:20.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Rain Man was favored to win Best Picture.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:20.52,0:21:24.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the voters must have thought it would be\Nfunny to make the Best and Worst Picture
Dialogue: 0,0:21:24.48,0:21:25.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,be Tom Cruise movies.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:32.55,0:21:36.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ok, so, before making this video,\NI hadn't watched any Star Trek at all.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:36.68,0:21:39.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But because I'm committed to my craft,\NI went ahead and watched
Dialogue: 0,0:21:39.28,0:21:40.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,all 6 of the original movies
Dialogue: 0,0:21:40.93,0:21:43.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just so I could understand why this one\Nis considered the worst.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:43.90,0:21:45.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and after all that, I—
Dialogue: 0,0:21:46.11,0:21:47.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah. I get it now.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:47.84,0:21:51.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's not a horrible movie but especially\Ncompared to the previous films in the series,
Dialogue: 0,0:21:51.57,0:21:53.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Star Trek V is pretty bleh.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:53.60,0:21:56.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Pretty much everything went wrong\Nbehind the scenes.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:56.03,0:21:59.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,William Shatner directed it\Nwith no prior directing experience.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:59.24,0:22:01.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Nobody could agree on anything\Nduring the writing process,
Dialogue: 0,0:22:01.84,0:22:03.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There was a writers' strike.
Dialogue: 0,0:22:03.37,0:22:04.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Then a Teamsters strike.
Dialogue: 0,0:22:04.66,0:22:06.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They shot a lot of the movie\Nin the Mojave Desert,
Dialogue: 0,0:22:06.70,0:22:08.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which is just as miserable as it sounds.
Dialogue: 0,0:22:08.67,0:22:12.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and after filming was done, they only had\N3 months to make the special effects,
Dialogue: 0,0:22:12.67,0:22:15.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and all the best effects technicians\Nin Hollywood were busy working on
Dialogue: 0,0:22:15.80,0:22:18.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Indiana Jones 3\Nand Ghostbusters II at the time.
Dialogue: 0,0:22:18.41,0:22:21.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Do I think this movie\Ndeserved Worst Picture? No.
Dialogue: 0,0:22:21.37,0:22:24.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It does some wacky things like\Nintroduce Spock's long-lost brother
Dialogue: 0,0:22:24.63,0:22:26.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that he never mentioned before
Dialogue: 0,0:22:26.09,0:22:28.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Or show Kirk getting mauled\Nby a cat woman.
Dialogue: 0,0:22:28.49,0:22:30.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but overall I really don't think it's that bad
Dialogue: 0,0:22:30.95,0:22:32.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Though to be honest
Dialogue: 0,0:22:32.04,0:22:33.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not a Trekkie who had to see
Dialogue: 0,0:22:33.46,0:22:36.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Captain Kirk show up on the Enterprise\Nin a "Go climb a rock t-shirt"
Dialogue: 0,0:22:36.83,0:22:37.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So…
Dialogue: 0,0:22:39.81,0:22:41.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean…is that-is that bad?
Dialogue: 0,0:22:41.81,0:22:43.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I-I actually don't know.
Dialogue: 0,0:22:44.66,0:22:48.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Can someone in the comments tell me\Nif i'm, if that's like a bad,
Dialogue: 0,0:22:48.01,0:22:49.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,if that's not in character?
Dialogue: 0,0:22:49.12,0:22:51.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I actually don't know if I\Nshould be mad at this or not?
Dialogue: 0,0:22:58.56,0:23:00.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Adventures of Ford Fairlane was a
Dialogue: 0,0:23:00.79,0:23:02.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"comedy" starring Andrew Dice Clay.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:02.89,0:23:04.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you don't know who Andrew Dice Clay is,
Dialogue: 0,0:23:04.64,0:23:07.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he was a comedian most active\Nin the late 80s and early 90s
Dialogue: 0,0:23:07.93,0:23:10.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who was known for his character the Dice Man,
Dialogue: 0,0:23:10.31,0:23:14.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which was basically a cover for him to tell\Nthe most offensive jokes he possibly could.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:14.71,0:23:16.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And they're always on parade.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:16.66,0:23:19.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They march up and down the street\Nwith t-shirts and flags
Dialogue: 0,0:23:19.42,0:23:21.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'I want money for AIDS disease.'\NBeautiful.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:21.70,0:23:25.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want money for a new fucking car,\NI ain't marching up and down the street
Dialogue: 0,0:23:25.28,0:23:26.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Get a job, butt slammer.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:26.51,0:23:29.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Evasive] The movie itself\Nis about a detective, I guess,
Dialogue: 0,0:23:29.58,0:23:31.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I dunno, it's just not funny at all.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:31.38,0:23:34.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,honestly I kept going to my phone the\Nwhole time because I was just so bored.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:34.59,0:23:36.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I got something serious to discuss.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:37.70,0:23:41.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, what is it, premature ejaculation?\N(laughing)
Dialogue: 0,0:23:41.12,0:23:43.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like that time we were at her\Nparents' wedding anniversary,
Dialogue: 0,0:23:43.77,0:23:44.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I told that joke,
Dialogue: 0,0:23:45.16,0:23:47.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'What's the definition of vagina?
Dialogue: 0,0:23:47.30,0:23:50.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The box the peanuts comes in!' (laugh)
Dialogue: 0,0:23:50.55,0:23:53.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Gilbert Godfrey plays\Nthe only funny character in the movie
Dialogue: 0,0:23:53.31,0:23:56.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but he dies like 25 minutes in\Nand the rest is just a boring mess
Dialogue: 0,0:23:56.74,0:23:58.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that's impossible to follow.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:58.36,0:24:01.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The director Renny Harlin was also\Nworking on Die Hard 2 at the time
Dialogue: 0,0:24:01.82,0:24:05.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which ended up coming out in theaters\Nat the exact same time as Ford Fairlane
Dialogue: 0,0:24:05.66,0:24:08.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and when you look at the money\Ncomparison between the two movies.
Dialogue: 0,0:24:08.56,0:24:11.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, it's pretty obvious which movie\Nhe cared about more.
Dialogue: 0,0:24:11.13,0:24:13.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Clint Eastwood.
Dialogue: 0,0:24:13.42,0:24:15.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I fucked him. Oh!
Dialogue: 0,0:24:22.39,0:24:24.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Evasive] 1990 was another tie
Dialogue: 0,0:24:24.36,0:24:26.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with Ford Fairlane tieing\Nwith another movie
Dialogue: 0,0:24:26.80,0:24:29.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,from unapologetic\Npepophile John Derek.
Dialogue: 0,0:24:29.14,0:24:33.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In this one, Bo Derek plays a woman\Nmarried to a much older man
Dialogue: 0,0:24:33.06,0:24:36.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and when the older man dies,\Nhis ghost takes up residence in her head
Dialogue: 0,0:24:36.75,0:24:38.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and goads her into murdering a man
Dialogue: 0,0:24:38.57,0:24:41.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so he can possess his body\Nand have sex with her again.
Dialogue: 0,0:24:41.34,0:24:43.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a supernatural dirty old man movie
Dialogue: 0,0:24:43.86,0:24:45.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,where John Derek fantasizes about
Dialogue: 0,0:24:45.55,0:24:48.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,living rent-free in Bo Derek's head\Nafter he dies.
Dialogue: 0,0:24:48.47,0:24:50.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Plus this ended up being his last movie.
Dialogue: 0,0:24:50.81,0:24:53.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It would be poetic\Nif it wasn't so disgusting.
Dialogue: 0,0:24:53.21,0:24:57.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Bo was very very young.\NLinda was very young…
Dialogue: 0,0:24:57.62,0:24:59.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,not as young as urcela
Dialogue: 0,0:24:59.75,0:25:01.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I guess I just meet them young,
Dialogue: 0,0:25:01.71,0:25:04.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,before they're wise enough\Nto know I'm not the guy.
Dialogue: 0,0:25:04.14,0:25:06.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Anyway the acting is bad,\Nthe story is bad,
Dialogue: 0,0:25:06.65,0:25:08.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the visuals are bad,
Dialogue: 0,0:25:08.16,0:25:10.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but the real cherry on top here is: this movie
Dialogue: 0,0:25:10.60,0:25:13.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was the first film appearance\Nof Donald Trump.
Dialogue: 0,0:25:13.16,0:25:17.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No joke, Trump's first movie\Nwas made by a pedophile.
Dialogue: 0,0:25:17.23,0:25:19.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He even does a little duck face in it,\Nlook at him.
Dialogue: 0,0:25:22.49,0:25:23.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Poetic.
Dialogue: 0,0:25:29.48,0:25:30.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Just watch this clip.
Dialogue: 0,0:25:30.56,0:25:31.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Woah!
Dialogue: 0,0:25:32.86,0:25:34.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Happy sailing..
Dialogue: 0,0:25:35.38,0:25:40.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh no! How am I driving?\N1-800-I'm gonna-fucking-die!"
Dialogue: 0,0:25:40.12,0:25:43.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Evasive] Bruce Willis plays\Na master burglar fresh out of prison
Dialogue: 0,0:25:43.22,0:25:45.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who was blackmailed into stealing some art
Dialogue: 0,0:25:45.32,0:25:48.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but it's all part of a conspiracy\Nto build a secret machine
Dialogue: 0,0:25:48.12,0:25:50.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,invented by Leonardo Da Vinci\Nthat can turn lead into gold.
Dialogue: 0,0:25:50.47,0:25:54.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,At this point in his career, Bruce Willis\Nwas mainly known for Die Hard 1 and 2,
Dialogue: 0,0:25:54.55,0:25:56.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and was looking to branch out\Nwith Hudson Hawk.
Dialogue: 0,0:25:56.78,0:25:59.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but apparently he couldn't decide\Nwhat he wanted it to be.
Dialogue: 0,0:25:59.51,0:26:01.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In an interview,\None of the writers later said:
Dialogue: 0,0:26:01.43,0:26:03.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I started to know we were in trouble
Dialogue: 0,0:26:03.17,0:26:05.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when Joel and Bruce\Nwould say during filming
Dialogue: 0,0:26:05.28,0:26:08.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You know what this is?\NThis is a Pink Panther movie.
Dialogue: 0,0:26:08.07,0:26:09.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The next day they'd say
Dialogue: 0,0:26:09.34,0:26:12.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You know what this is? This is an\NAmerican James Bond movie.
Dialogue: 0,0:26:12.45,0:26:16.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Then it would be: you know what this is\NThis is North by Northwest.
Dialogue: 0,0:26:16.08,0:26:17.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I even remember someone saying:
Dialogue: 0,0:26:17.61,0:26:19.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You know what this is?\NThis is Casino Royale.
Dialogue: 0,0:26:19.96,0:26:23.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Eventually I realized, that if every day they\Nwere saying it was something different
Dialogue: 0,0:26:23.86,0:26:26.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,by the time we got to the editing room,\Nwe were going to be in trouble.
Dialogue: 0,0:26:26.73,0:26:29.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So yeah, the final product\Nis all over the place.
Dialogue: 0,0:26:29.04,0:26:31.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But the movie has developed\Na bit of a cult following over the years
Dialogue: 0,0:26:31.97,0:26:34.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just because it's so…so silly
Dialogue: 0,0:26:34.94,0:26:36.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(screaming)
Dialogue: 0,0:26:36.66,0:26:38.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Honey?\N- (screaming)
Dialogue: 0,0:26:39.40,0:26:40.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ball ball?
Dialogue: 0,0:26:40.40,0:26:41.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Woof!
Dialogue: 0,0:26:42.65,0:26:45.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(dog screaming)
Dialogue: 0,0:26:52.65,0:26:54.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Here's another movie\Nthat's really not that bad.
Dialogue: 0,0:26:54.91,0:26:58.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a World War II spy movie where\NMelanie Griffith is a half Jewish woman
Dialogue: 0,0:26:58.75,0:27:02.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with no spy experience\Nwho signs herself up to be a spy in Berlin
Dialogue: 0,0:27:02.20,0:27:06.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because she wants to prove herself and\Nsave her Jewish cousins who are in hiding.
Dialogue: 0,0:27:06.20,0:27:08.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Michael Douglas plays another spy
Dialogue: 0,0:27:08.47,0:27:11.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and pre-Schindler's List\NLiam Neeson plays a Nazi officer.
Dialogue: 0,0:27:11.94,0:27:14.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Most of the complaints about\Nthe movie were aimed at
Dialogue: 0,0:27:14.19,0:27:16.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,how unbelievable\NMelanie Griffith is as a spy
Dialogue: 0,0:27:16.57,0:27:18.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because she is really bad at her job.
Dialogue: 0,0:27:18.80,0:27:22.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Like "spilling soup on Liam Neeson and\Ntaking the German kids she's nannying
Dialogue: 0,0:27:22.54,0:27:25.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to the building her cousins are hiding in"\Nkind of bad
Dialogue: 0,0:27:25.66,0:27:28.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But overall it's not that awful of a movie
Dialogue: 0,0:27:28.11,0:27:30.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because the plot holes\Nand writing problems
Dialogue: 0,0:27:30.16,0:27:33.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,are balanced out by a good soundtrack\Nand good cinematography
Dialogue: 0,0:27:33.41,0:27:34.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's just average.
Dialogue: 0,0:27:34.66,0:27:36.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not bad enough to be memorable
Dialogue: 0,0:27:36.10,0:27:38.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but not good enough\Nthat you'd ever watch it again.
Dialogue: 0,0:27:38.50,0:27:40.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,basically the cinematic equivalent\Nof eating at Denny's.
Dialogue: 0,0:27:40.80,0:27:44.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think 1992 was just a slow year\Nfor bad movies in general.
Dialogue: 0,0:27:44.44,0:27:47.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That same year they also \Nnominated Newsies for Worst Picture
Dialogue: 0,0:27:47.76,0:27:50.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and Danny DeVito for\NWorst Supporting Actor
Dialogue: 0,0:27:50.76,0:27:54.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like…what? Why? How?
Dialogue: 0,0:27:56.15,0:27:56.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What?
Dialogue: 0,0:28:04.07,0:28:06.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Once again, this is a movie\Nthat's not that bad.
Dialogue: 0,0:28:06.35,0:28:08.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a drama where\NWoody Harrelson and Demi Moore
Dialogue: 0,0:28:08.70,0:28:11.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,play a financially struggling\Nmarried couple in Vegas
Dialogue: 0,0:28:11.24,0:28:13.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and Robert Redford is a filthy rich guy
Dialogue: 0,0:28:13.45,0:28:15.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who offers the couple 1 million dollars
Dialogue: 0,0:28:15.53,0:28:17.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for a 1 night stand with Demi Moore.
Dialogue: 0,0:28:17.64,0:28:19.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Honestly, it's fine.
Dialogue: 0,0:28:19.37,0:28:23.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It takes itself very seriously\Nand it's vaguely misogynistic at points.
Dialogue: 0,0:28:23.40,0:28:26.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Also it's completely unbelievable that\Na man who looks like Robert Redford
Dialogue: 0,0:28:26.96,0:28:29.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,would ever feel the need to\Npay a million dollars
Dialogue: 0,0:28:29.40,0:28:30.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to sleep with someone
Dialogue: 0,0:28:30.73,0:28:32.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But in the context of the movie it all works.
Dialogue: 0,0:28:32.80,0:28:34.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,definitely not the\Nworst movie of the year.
Dialogue: 0,0:28:34.60,0:28:35.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that's for sure
Dialogue: 0,0:28:35.60,0:28:37.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean You're telling me that Indecent Proposal
Dialogue: 0,0:28:37.52,0:28:40.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,won Worst Picture but Mr. Nanny\Nwasn't even nominated?
Dialogue: 0,0:28:40.82,0:28:43.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Razzie voters were asleep\Nat the wheel this year.
Dialogue: 0,0:28:52.65,0:28:56.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In this one Bruce Willis plays a\Npsychologist who can't see the color red
Dialogue: 0,0:28:56.37,0:28:58.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who gets wrapped up\Nin a murder after his colleague
Dialogue: 0,0:28:58.85,0:29:00.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,gets killed Assassin's Creed-style
Dialogue: 0,0:29:00.54,0:29:02.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and he suspects it was someone\Nin his therapy group.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:02.72,0:29:05.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm so confused why this\Nwas even nominated for Worst Picture
Dialogue: 0,0:29:05.90,0:29:08.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because it really isn't a bad movie at all.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:08.11,0:29:11.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's surreal and weird, sure,\Nbut in a Twin Peaks type of way
Dialogue: 0,0:29:11.59,0:29:13.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,where it's still unsettling\Nand fun to watch.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:13.97,0:29:16.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Definitely a 6.5 out of 10 movie for me.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:17.99,0:29:19.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Maybe a 7 out of 10 I dunno.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:19.42,0:29:22.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this is another one that became a\Ncult hit after it was released on home video
Dialogue: 0,0:29:22.56,0:29:26.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Partly because of this crazy sex scene\Nin a pool that everybody wanted to see
Dialogue: 0,0:29:26.11,0:29:28.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was even streaming\Non Criterion Channel at one point
Dialogue: 0,0:29:28.51,0:29:30.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which basically means\Nthat it's certified art.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:30.84,0:29:32.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's all I have to say.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:32.32,0:29:36.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I dunno guys, some of these 90s movies\Njust aren't bad enough to complain about.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:42.67,0:29:45.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's a lot to be said about Showgirls.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:45.16,0:29:47.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,First of all, Director Paul Verhoeven
Dialogue: 0,0:29:47.17,0:29:49.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was the first to accept\Nhis Razzie award in person.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:49.94,0:29:51.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And that's kind of funny.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:51.75,0:29:55.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Paul] And I'm very happy \Nbecause it was much better, much more fun
Dialogue: 0,0:29:55.48,0:29:58.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,than reading the reviews in September. \NThank you so much.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:58.19,0:30:01.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(clapping, cheering)
Dialogue: 0,0:30:01.72,0:30:03.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Second of all, Showgirls isn't bad.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:03.85,0:30:07.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's actually a great movie, \Nin my opinion, and a lot of people agree.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:07.23,0:30:11.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It is a wild movie about the world of\Nhigh budget Las Vegas strip shows
Dialogue: 0,0:30:11.04,0:30:12.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and Obviously with subject matter like that
Dialogue: 0,0:30:12.94,0:30:14.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you're going to view it very differently
Dialogue: 0,0:30:14.91,0:30:16.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,depending on your gender and sexuality.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:16.86,0:30:19.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But regardless of what kind\Nof person you are
Dialogue: 0,0:30:19.04,0:30:22.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the experience of watching this movie\Nis an absolute rollercoaster.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:22.09,0:30:24.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,One. Two. Three.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:24.01,0:30:28.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thrust it. Thrust it. thrust it. Thrust it!
Dialogue: 0,0:30:28.05,0:30:29.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Come on, thrust it.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:29.49,0:30:33.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But for as over the top as this movie is\Nit's also pretty true to life.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:33.13,0:30:36.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,During his research, \Nwriter Joe Eszterhas interviewed
Dialogue: 0,0:30:36.01,0:30:38.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,over two hundred strippers in Las Vegas
Dialogue: 0,0:30:38.19,0:30:41.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the result was a\Nshockingly straightforward depiction
Dialogue: 0,0:30:41.22,0:30:44.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of the lives of high profile\Nsex workers and performers
Dialogue: 0,0:30:44.07,0:30:47.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And a biting satire against\Nshow business in general.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:47.24,0:30:48.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Take a look at these tits.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:48.73,0:30:50.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What are these, watermelons?
Dialogue: 0,0:30:50.50,0:30:52.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is a stage, babe, it's not a patch.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:52.90,0:30:53.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,See ya.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:53.70,0:30:55.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Your ears are sticking out. They are.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:56.07,0:30:58.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Come back and see me\Nwhen you get em fixed.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:58.52,0:30:59.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,See ya.
Dialogue: 0,0:31:01.21,0:31:03.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Can you spell MGM backwards?\NI bet you can't.
Dialogue: 0,0:31:03.41,0:31:05.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- MGM.\N- I'm impressed.
Dialogue: 0,0:31:05.61,0:31:08.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Come back when you\Nfuck some of those baby fat off.
Dialogue: 0,0:31:08.05,0:31:11.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now in today's era of gritty HBO dramas,\Nnone of this is that shocking
Dialogue: 0,0:31:11.78,0:31:14.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but in 1995 this was next level stuff.
Dialogue: 0,0:31:14.84,0:31:18.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Plus with the subject matter,\Nthis movie has a lot of nudity.
Dialogue: 0,0:31:18.16,0:31:20.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was rated NC-17 in America
Dialogue: 0,0:31:20.53,0:31:25.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and to date it is the only NC-17 movie\Never given a wide release in theaters.
Dialogue: 0,0:31:25.22,0:31:27.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was so explicit and controversial
Dialogue: 0,0:31:27.71,0:31:31.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that MGM had to hire security\Nat every movie theater in America
Dialogue: 0,0:31:31.19,0:31:34.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just to make sure nobody under\Nthe age of 18 snuck into the theater.
Dialogue: 0,0:31:34.57,0:31:36.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The movie lost millions of dollars
Dialogue: 0,0:31:36.75,0:31:39.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and to this day, no studio has ever dared
Dialogue: 0,0:31:39.39,0:31:42.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to try and release an NC-17 movie\Nin theaters again.
Dialogue: 0,0:31:42.32,0:31:46.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If this sounds interesting to you,\NI actually recommend giving this movie a watch
Dialogue: 0,0:31:46.34,0:31:49.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because I can't really do it justice\Nwith just words alone.
Dialogue: 0,0:31:49.51,0:31:50.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Just know what you're getting
Dialogue: 0,0:31:50.46,0:31:51.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,into before you turn it on
Dialogue: 0,0:31:51.40,0:31:54.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because this movie is every bit\Nas traumatic as it is glamorous
Dialogue: 0,0:32:00.35,0:32:01.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This movie is like if showgirls
Dialogue: 0,0:32:01.92,0:32:03.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was actually bad
Dialogue: 0,0:32:03.04,0:32:04.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Demi Moore plays an FBI agent
Dialogue: 0,0:32:04.93,0:32:08.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who looses her daughter in a custody battle\Nand becomes a stripper in florida
Dialogue: 0,0:32:08.42,0:32:10.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,at a place called the eager beaver
Dialogue: 0,0:32:10.01,0:32:11.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to pay for a court appeal
Dialogue: 0,0:32:11.69,0:32:14.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,she basically girl bosses\Nbeing a stripper
Dialogue: 0,0:32:14.02,0:32:16.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,not in a nuance way\Nlike showgirls though
Dialogue: 0,0:32:16.22,0:32:19.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but in a stupid way that\Ntakes itself too seriously
Dialogue: 0,0:32:19.38,0:32:21.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and is mostly just boring\Nand not believable at all
Dialogue: 0,0:32:21.95,0:32:25.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,despite the bad reviews the movie\Nended up being a huge success
Dialogue: 0,0:32:25.01,0:32:27.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The director, writer, producer\NAndrew Bergman
Dialogue: 0,0:32:27.50,0:32:29.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,basically quit holly wood after this movie
Dialogue: 0,0:32:29.76,0:32:33.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm pretty sure what happened is once\Nhe got Demi Moore to agree to go topless
Dialogue: 0,0:32:33.53,0:32:36.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he just phoned in the rest of the movie\Nbecause clearly the audiences
Dialogue: 0,0:32:36.83,0:32:39.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who went to see this\Nweren't watching it for the plot
Dialogue: 0,0:32:45.82,0:32:49.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The post man takes place\Nin a distant future year of 2013
Dialogue: 0,0:32:49.34,0:32:52.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,after much of humanity has\Nbeen wiped out by the plague
Dialogue: 0,0:32:52.05,0:32:56.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Kevin Costner who also directed the movie\Nstars as a traveling shakespeare performer
Dialogue: 0,0:32:56.97,0:33:00.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that's conscripted to caesar's legion\Nbut he escapes and finds an old mail bag
Dialogue: 0,0:33:00.50,0:33:03.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,full of mail and pretends\Nto be a mail man so he can get food
Dialogue: 0,0:33:03.40,0:33:06.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and accidently restarts the\Nus postal service in the process
Dialogue: 0,0:33:06.68,0:33:08.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,also it's almost 3 hours long
Dialogue: 0,0:33:08.77,0:33:13.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,honestly as far as post apocalyptic\Nadventures go, this one isn't that bad
Dialogue: 0,0:33:13.09,0:33:16.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's about the same level of quality\Nas water world actually
Dialogue: 0,0:33:16.37,0:33:20.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but the fact that it was a 3 hour long\Nkevin costner vanity project
Dialogue: 0,0:33:20.36,0:33:24.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,released just a week after titanic\Nmade it a very easy target for critiques
Dialogue: 0,0:33:24.69,0:33:27.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,what is Kevin Costner up to\Nthese days anyway
Dialogue: 0,0:33:27.42,0:33:30.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,{\i1}typing on computer{\i0}
Dialogue: 0,0:33:39.25,0:33:41.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean hey, good luck Kevin
Dialogue: 0,0:33:49.55,0:33:50.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you aren't familiar
Dialogue: 0,0:33:50.59,0:33:56.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The name Alan Smithee is a fake name the directors\Nguild of america came up with in 1968
Dialogue: 0,0:33:56.02,0:33:59.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that directors who wanted to take their\Nname off a movie, were required to use instead
Dialogue: 0,0:33:59.90,0:34:03.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and this movie caused such a headache\Nthat the directors guild had to
Dialogue: 0,0:34:03.66,0:34:07.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,officially stop allowing the use of the\NAlan Smithee name in movies
Dialogue: 0,0:34:07.40,0:34:11.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,OK, so, this movie was written by\NJoe Eszterhas and directed by Arthur Hiller
Dialogue: 0,0:34:11.66,0:34:15.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a mockumentary about a guy\Nwho's name is actually Alan Smithee
Dialogue: 0,0:34:15.24,0:34:18.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who directs an action movie\Nbut he hates the finished product
Dialogue: 0,0:34:18.12,0:34:20.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so he steals the film reels\Nand holds them ransom
Dialogue: 0,0:34:20.51,0:34:22.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because he wasn't allowed to take\Nhis name of it
Dialogue: 0,0:34:22.65,0:34:25.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,now behind the scenes in real life\NJoe Eszterhas was in charge of
Dialogue: 0,0:34:25.93,0:34:29.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,cutting burn hollywood burn and when\NArthur Hillers saw the final version
Dialogue: 0,0:34:29.71,0:34:33.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he hated it so much he had\Nhis name taken off the movie
Dialogue: 0,0:34:33.09,0:34:36.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but this of course created confusion\Nbecause this was a movie
Dialogue: 0,0:34:36.08,0:34:40.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,about Alan Smithee and the poster\Nsaid it was directed by Alan Smithee
Dialogue: 0,0:34:40.45,0:34:45.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which you would assume was just a joke\Nbut no, the director actually had his name
Dialogue: 0,0:34:45.60,0:34:46.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,taken off the movie
Dialogue: 0,0:34:46.78,0:34:49.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it would take me so long to explain\Neverything that's wrong
Dialogue: 0,0:34:49.55,0:34:52.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with this movies so let me\Njust sum it up in four words
Dialogue: 0,0:34:56.59,0:34:59.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there is way too many characters\Nthe movie jumps all over the place
Dialogue: 0,0:34:59.71,0:35:01.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Harvey weinstein is in it
Dialogue: 0,0:35:01.72,0:35:03.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,{\i1}eww sound effect{\i0}
Dialogue: 0,0:35:03.07,0:35:06.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there's lots of not funny parts\Nwhere the camera freeze frames
Dialogue: 0,0:35:06.33,0:35:08.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and there's a wall\Nof text on screen
Dialogue: 0,0:35:08.02,0:35:11.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm guessing what happened is they\Nfilmed all these scenes separately
Dialogue: 0,0:35:11.21,0:35:14.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and thought they were hilarious on set\Nbut when they got to the editing room
Dialogue: 0,0:35:14.52,0:35:17.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,they realized they had nothing to work with\Nso Joe Eszterhas tried to
Dialogue: 0,0:35:17.97,0:35:20.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,salvage it by adding a bunch of\Ntext edit jokes
Dialogue: 0,0:35:20.49,0:35:22.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which actually made the movie worse
Dialogue: 0,0:35:22.05,0:35:24.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I have no proof of this of course\Nbut it seems right to me
Dialogue: 0,0:35:24.91,0:35:27.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean I'd probably do the\Nsame thing in that situation
Dialogue: 0,0:35:41.22,0:35:45.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,ok so this is a western steampunk\Nfusion movie starring the fresh prince
Dialogue: 0,0:35:45.61,0:35:48.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the guy who plays Mr. Fish odor\Nin bob's burgers
Dialogue: 0,0:35:48.60,0:35:53.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as cowboy government agents hunt down\Nan evil ex confederate officer with no legs
Dialogue: 0,0:35:53.41,0:35:57.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who kidnapped president\NUlysses S Grant with a giant robot spider
Dialogue: 0,0:35:58.88,0:36:00.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that's what this movie is
Dialogue: 0,0:36:08.01,0:36:09.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this movie is ridiculous
Dialogue: 0,0:36:09.47,0:36:12.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't know what the executives at\Nwarner brothers were snorting in the board room
Dialogue: 0,0:36:12.65,0:36:17.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when they decided to spend over $170\Non a movie where cowboy Will Smith
Dialogue: 0,0:36:17.36,0:36:19.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,fights a huge mecha-spider
Dialogue: 0,0:36:19.08,0:36:24.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but thank god they did because Will Smith\Nturned down playing Neo in the matrix to do this movie
Dialogue: 0,0:36:24.50,0:36:29.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I want you to imagine now what it\Nwould be like if Will Smith played Neo in the matrix
Dialogue: 0,0:36:31.27,0:36:32.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,{\i1}Evasive laughs{\i0}
Dialogue: 0,0:36:32.53,0:36:35.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Will Smith] I probably would have\Nmessed the matrix up. I wouldv'e ruined it
Dialogue: 0,0:36:35.09,0:36:37.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so I did y'all a favor
Dialogue: 0,0:36:37.16,0:36:41.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this might not be a good movie but\Noh my god it's so funny
Dialogue: 0,0:36:41.47,0:36:43.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,plus the theme song is pretty fire
Dialogue: 0,0:36:43.55,0:36:47.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"if I may quote one of the great gangster rappers\NWilliam Will Smith
Dialogue: 0,0:36:47.66,0:36:59.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,{\i1}wicky wild wild wicky wicky wild\Nwicky wild wicky wicky wild wild wild west{\i0}
Dialogue: 0,0:36:59.13,0:37:03.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,{\i1}wicky wild wicky wicky wild wild west{\i0}
Dialogue: 0,0:37:04.63,0:37:06.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,do you find those lyrics inspiring?
Dialogue: 0,0:37:06.14,0:37:07.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[person 1] I mean, I-I...
Dialogue: 0,0:37:15.26,0:37:20.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,battlefield earth is an action sci-fi movie\Nbased on a novel written by L. Ron Hubbard
Dialogue: 0,0:37:20.19,0:37:21.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the founder of scientology
Dialogue: 0,0:37:21.86,0:37:25.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which he wrote in 1982 when he\Nwas in hiding to avoid going to prison
Dialogue: 0,0:37:25.88,0:37:27.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for his numerous crimes
Dialogue: 0,0:37:27.33,0:37:30.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's about a distant future world\Nwhere humanity has been enslaved
Dialogue: 0,0:37:30.29,0:37:33.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,by evil aliens called the Psychlos\Nwhich are a very obvious metaphor
Dialogue: 0,0:37:33.93,0:37:36.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for L. Ron Hubbard's vitriolic hate of psychiatrists
Dialogue: 0,0:37:36.88,0:37:40.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,John Travolta who plays the evil\Nalien leader named Terl
Dialogue: 0,0:37:40.49,0:37:45.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and has been a scientologist since 1975\Nis directly responsible for this movie existing
Dialogue: 0,0:37:45.72,0:37:49.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the production company that took it on\Nwas later found to have defrauded investers
Dialogue: 0,0:37:49.33,0:37:53.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,out of $31 million by over reporting\Nproduction costs causing a law-suit
Dialogue: 0,0:37:53.80,0:37:57.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that forced the company to go bankrupt\Nand shut down in 2007
Dialogue: 0,0:37:57.28,0:38:01.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,on top of that the movie was a massive\Nfinancial flop not just because the movie
Dialogue: 0,0:38:01.50,0:38:05.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and it's John Travolta action figures\Nwere an obvious scientology recruitment tactic
Dialogue: 0,0:38:05.95,0:38:08.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but because the movie itself\Nwas a visual nightmare
Dialogue: 0,0:38:08.78,0:38:12.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the special effects are ugly\Nthe costumes are disgusting
Dialogue: 0,0:38:12.12,0:38:13.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the whole movie was filmed
Dialogue: 0,0:38:13.57,0:38:16.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with these crooked angles that changed\Nmultiple times a scene
Dialogue: 0,0:38:16.80,0:38:19.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which gave a bunch of people motion sickness
Dialogue: 0,0:38:19.27,0:38:22.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's a realy infamously bad movie\Nthat's been covered by dozens of
Dialogue: 0,0:38:22.17,0:38:23.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,other youtube channels over the years
Dialogue: 0,0:38:23.77,0:38:26.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so if you want more information on it\Ngo watch one of those videos
Dialogue: 0,0:38:26.43,0:38:29.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just don't watch the movie itself because\Nit will do nothing but make you nauseous
Dialogue: 0,0:38:29.97,0:38:31.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and waste 2 hours of your time
Dialogue: 0,0:38:31.61,0:38:33.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm serious you guys\Ndon't do it
Dialogue: 0,0:38:41.21,0:38:42.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm sorry you guys
Dialogue: 0,0:38:42.32,0:38:43.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,conflict of interest
Dialogue: 0,0:38:43.67,0:38:45.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I can't talk about Freddy got fingered
Dialogue: 0,0:38:45.33,0:38:49.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,one of my friends and I watched this movie\Nlike 4x during quarantine and we
Dialogue: 0,0:38:49.01,0:38:50.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,kind of bonded over it
Dialogue: 0,0:38:50.43,0:38:52.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and now this movie has a special\Nplace in my heart
Dialogue: 0,0:38:54.24,0:38:56.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so I made Nicky watch it instead\Nbecause shes never seen it before
Dialogue: 0,0:38:56.74,0:38:57.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and here she is now
Dialogue: 0,0:38:57.82,0:39:01.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Nicky} where the hell do I even\Nbegin with this movie
Dialogue: 0,0:39:01.41,0:39:06.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,part of me thinks this movie is some kind\Nof deep anti comedy meant to saterize
Dialogue: 0,0:39:06.68,0:39:11.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the other gross out comedies that\Nwere popular in the early 2000s
Dialogue: 0,0:39:11.10,0:39:14.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the other part of me thinks that \Nmaybe it means nothing at all
Dialogue: 0,0:39:14.53,0:39:21.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean any normal human being\Nwill read a title like Freddy got fingered
Dialogue: 0,0:39:21.28,0:39:23.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and run away in the opposite direction
Dialogue: 0,0:39:23.68,0:39:25.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because what the fuck\Nis that suppose to mean
Dialogue: 0,0:39:28.03,0:39:31.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but to put it simply\Nthis movie is about a 28yr old man
Dialogue: 0,0:39:37.10,0:39:42.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,his name is Gord\Nand he moves to LA to be a cheese worker
Dialogue: 0,0:39:42.16,0:39:46.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and also to pursue his dreams\Nof being a professional animator
Dialogue: 0,0:39:46.12,0:39:49.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,seems pretty simple right?\Nseems pretty cut and dry
Dialogue: 0,0:39:49.85,0:39:54.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but that's where you'd be wrong\Nbecause so very many things happen
Dialogue: 0,0:39:54.23,0:39:57.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in this movie that are beyond\Nhuman explanation
Dialogue: 0,0:39:57.78,0:40:01.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just to name a few\NTom Green jerks off a horse
Dialogue: 0,0:40:01.32,0:40:05.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he swings a baby around by it's\Numbilical cord
Dialogue: 0,0:40:05.32,0:40:10.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Tom Green walks around in a deer carcass\Nand he goes scuba diving in his own toilet
Dialogue: 0,0:40:10.90,0:40:17.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[movie dialogue] get out of the toilet.\Nget out of that toilet!
Dialogue: 0,0:40:17.06,0:40:21.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but at the risk of sounding clinically\Ninsane and demented
Dialogue: 0,0:40:21.97,0:40:27.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there are moments in this movie\Nthat I find kind of relatable
Dialogue: 0,0:40:27.21,0:40:30.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like this one where the CEO of\Nan animation company tells
Dialogue: 0,0:40:30.74,0:40:33.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Gord that he doesn't like his drawings
Dialogue: 0,0:40:33.72,0:40:34.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"it sucks"
Dialogue: 0,0:40:34.75,0:40:39.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and so he immediatly sticks a gun\Nin his mouth and starts screaming
Dialogue: 0,0:40:43.71,0:40:47.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and what makes this even funnier\Nis the fact that once he recieves
Dialogue: 0,0:40:47.64,0:40:53.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,validation, he takes the gun out of his mouth\Nand acts like none of that ever happened at all
Dialogue: 0,0:40:56.65,0:41:01.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,if you're mentally ill and make art\Nthis is the film for you
Dialogue: 0,0:41:10.02,0:41:15.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and this movie surprised me in so many\Ndifferent ways for one, it made me laugh
Dialogue: 0,0:41:15.08,0:41:16.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,way more than I anticipated
Dialogue: 0,0:41:16.96,0:41:19.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"can't you see we're both a couple\Nof stupid idiots
Dialogue: 0,0:41:19.38,0:41:22.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[female] Gord\N[Gord] Gord, Gordy
Dialogue: 0,0:41:22.60,0:41:28.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and it was all so like weirdly based\Nat times and I say weirdly because
Dialogue: 0,0:41:28.12,0:41:31.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the early 2000s was just like a diragatory\Nfever dream
Dialogue: 0,0:41:31.43,0:41:34.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it was like running through\Nthe perfume department in spongebob
Dialogue: 0,0:41:34.76,0:41:36.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but the perfume was slurs
Dialogue: 0,0:41:36.95,0:41:40.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so like Gord ends up asking out\Nthis nurse named Betty
Dialogue: 0,0:41:40.93,0:41:46.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and she says yes but afterwards he finds\Nout that she's in a wheelchair and at first
Dialogue: 0,0:41:46.81,0:41:51.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm was like oh shit! like it's about to\Nget really ableist in here
Dialogue: 0,0:41:52.12,0:41:57.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was truly prepared for the worst but\Nmy expectations were completely subvirted
Dialogue: 0,0:41:57.26,0:42:01.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when Betty ended up not only being the\Nsmartest person in this whole movie
Dialogue: 0,0:42:01.74,0:42:05.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but her and Gord remain in a relationship\Nfor the rest of the film
Dialogue: 0,0:42:06.90,0:42:12.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"have a bag of jewels for you\Nthey're jewels Betty, they're jewels"
Dialogue: 0,0:42:12.95,0:42:17.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,another interesting thing to me is that\Nbetty constantly wants to give Gord
Dialogue: 0,0:42:17.72,0:42:22.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a blow job. Hear me out dude\Nlike, she actually asks him this
Dialogue: 0,0:42:22.06,0:42:27.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so many times in the movie that\Nit comes off as very obviously satirical
Dialogue: 0,0:42:37.65,0:42:43.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and again my expectations were subverted\Nby Gord being the one that repeatedly asks
Dialogue: 0,0:42:43.58,0:42:45.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,if they can just go out on a date
Dialogue: 0,0:42:53.84,0:42:58.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This could be a play on the trope of\Nmale protaganist in comedy especially
Dialogue: 0,0:42:58.67,0:43:02.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,being obssesed with sex\Nand not only that but woman
Dialogue: 0,0:43:02.76,0:43:05.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,being ultra sexualized in these movies
Dialogue: 0,0:43:05.24,0:43:08.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,not all the subversion in this movie\Nis good though necessarily
Dialogue: 0,0:43:08.68,0:43:11.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean if you were wondering how\Nthe movie got its title
Dialogue: 0,0:43:11.80,0:43:15.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I shit you not about 50mins into the film
Dialogue: 0,0:43:15.12,0:43:19.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Gord frames his dad\Nfor fingering his brother
Dialogue: 0,0:43:19.81,0:43:22.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"at least I don't touch Freddy"\N"he fingers him"
Dialogue: 0,0:43:22.17,0:43:25.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,his brother who is like 25 and\Ndoesn't even live with them
Dialogue: 0,0:43:25.11,0:43:29.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"he's a molester"\N"he's a chiiiild molester"
Dialogue: 0,0:43:29.39,0:43:35.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but CPS literally goes to his apartment\Nand takes him to the molestation hospital
Dialogue: 0,0:43:35.24,0:43:37.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is this shocking? yes
Dialogue: 0,0:43:37.90,0:43:39.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't know if it's shocking\Ncompared to the other
Dialogue: 0,0:43:39.99,0:43:41.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,things that happen in this movie
Dialogue: 0,0:43:44.63,0:43:48.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is it in poor taste?\Nlike, uhhhh, maybe
Dialogue: 0,0:43:48.74,0:43:52.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but anyways this whole framing of the\Nfingering is the cannon event
Dialogue: 0,0:43:52.59,0:43:54.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that leads to the finale of the film
Dialogue: 0,0:43:54.65,0:43:59.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when Gord pranks his dad by\Nabducting him in the middle of the night
Dialogue: 0,0:43:59.20,0:44:01.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and taking him to pakistan
Dialogue: 0,0:44:01.07,0:44:02.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"you're fucking dead"
Dialogue: 0,0:44:04.51,0:44:09.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,they could write books and novels\Nand college thesis about everything
Dialogue: 0,0:44:09.27,0:44:12.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,else that happens in-between\Nthen and the ending
Dialogue: 0,0:44:12.70,0:44:16.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but just know that this movie ends with\NGord and his dad being covered
Dialogue: 0,0:44:16.69,0:44:17.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in elephant c**
Dialogue: 0,0:44:22.63,0:44:23.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,speaking of which
Dialogue: 0,0:44:23.55,0:44:30.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there's an elephant in this room and\Nthe elephant is that I actually kind of like this movie
Dialogue: 0,0:44:30.46,0:44:31.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,also the elephant is cumming
Dialogue: 0,0:44:32.39,0:44:36.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is that so wrong?\Nand is it so wrong that maybe kind of
Dialogue: 0,0:44:36.24,0:44:41.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I might be attracted to Tom Green in this movie?\Nis it maybe ok if I think
Dialogue: 0,0:44:41.63,0:44:44.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he might be the Pete Davidson of the 90s
Dialogue: 0,0:44:44.05,0:44:47.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you know what, shut up\Nas far as career ruining films go
Dialogue: 0,0:44:47.44,0:44:53.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Tom Green took the failure of Freddie very\Nvery well. He even showed up to accept
Dialogue: 0,0:44:53.05,0:44:56.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,his golden razzie\Nhe rolled out his own red carpet too
Dialogue: 0,0:45:05.37,0:45:08.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,celebrate your successes and your failures
Dialogue: 0,0:45:15.96,0:45:18.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[evasive] a remake of an italian film\Nfrom 1974
Dialogue: 0,0:45:18.74,0:45:23.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,swept away is a movie where Madonna\Nplays the dumbest most unlikable rich woman
Dialogue: 0,0:45:23.23,0:45:23.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in the world
Dialogue: 0,0:45:23.94,0:45:27.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who gets marooned on an island\Nwith an italian sailor who hates her
Dialogue: 0,0:45:27.57,0:45:30.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and sexually assaults her.\NAnd then 3 mins after that
Dialogue: 0,0:45:30.42,0:45:32.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there's a time skip and suddenly\Nthey're in love
Dialogue: 0,0:45:32.84,0:45:37.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its a nasty nasty nasty movie\Nand I don't even want to talk about it
Dialogue: 0,0:45:37.65,0:45:41.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it was so bad it caused Madonna\Nto give up on acting entirely
Dialogue: 0,0:45:41.25,0:45:44.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's a disaster.\NAbsolute agony to watch
Dialogue: 0,0:45:44.43,0:45:48.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,especially when you consider that the movie\Nwas directed by Madonna's then husband Guy Ritchie
Dialogue: 0,0:45:48.73,0:45:52.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Madonna later divorced Guy Ritchie in 2008\Nbut in my opinion queen should've
Dialogue: 0,0:45:52.82,0:45:55.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,divorced Guy Ritchie on the spot for\Neven suggesting this movie
Dialogue: 0,0:45:55.82,0:46:01.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Madonna] it was rough. There was nothing\Nglamorous about it and you were really mean to me
Dialogue: 0,0:46:01.38,0:46:03.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Guy] Mrs. Ritchie\N[Madonna] I just want to slap you on camera
Dialogue: 0,0:46:03.43,0:46:04.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Guy] but why Mrs. Ritchie
Dialogue: 0,0:46:05.33,0:46:08.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Madonna] for all those times you let adriano \Nslap me and you never yelled cut
Dialogue: 0,0:46:09.13,0:46:11.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and all those times they threw octopuses on me\Nand all those times you made me sit
Dialogue: 0,0:46:11.81,0:46:13.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in the freezing cold ice water\Nand those times you made me run
Dialogue: 0,0:46:13.95,0:46:17.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,down the sand dune and all those\Ntimes you ate my food and you didn't pay me
Dialogue: 0,0:46:17.31,0:46:18.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and you never said thank you
Dialogue: 0,0:46:19.26,0:46:23.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,{\i1}Madonna cries and leaves{\i0}
Dialogue: 0,0:46:39.40,0:46:40.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not going to lie
Dialogue: 0,0:46:40.17,0:46:44.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was riding the high of actually\Nenjoying Freddie got fingered
Dialogue: 0,0:46:44.43,0:46:48.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when Gigli came in and literally snuffed\Nthe life out of me
Dialogue: 0,0:46:48.40,0:46:50.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Gigle is a movie
Dialogue: 0,0:46:52.14,0:46:56.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's about a mobster names Gigli\Nplayed by Benjamin, Benny boy Affleck
Dialogue: 0,0:46:56.43,0:47:01.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and much like this review on letter box,\NI too hope Gigli killed himself
Dialogue: 0,0:47:01.44,0:47:06.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because not only does he abduct a\Nmentally challenged teenager
Dialogue: 0,0:47:06.14,0:47:08.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and abuse him while holding him for ransom
Dialogue: 0,0:47:11.74,0:47:15.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he's also just cringe\Nunforgivably so
Dialogue: 0,0:47:15.61,0:47:18.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jaylo was also in this movie unfortunately
Dialogue: 0,0:47:18.58,0:47:22.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and she plays this other mobster \Nor mobsteret
Dialogue: 0,0:47:22.36,0:47:26.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who is suppose to help him\Ntake care of this mentally disabled kid
Dialogue: 0,0:47:26.34,0:47:29.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and she also just happens to be a lesbian
Dialogue: 0,0:47:33.23,0:47:37.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or should I say the least convincing\Nlesbian in film history
Dialogue: 0,0:47:37.10,0:47:40.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,no lesbians were consulted in\Nthe making of this movie
Dialogue: 0,0:47:40.01,0:47:41.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because what the fuck is this
Dialogue: 0,0:47:47.13,0:47:50.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you may not be able to tell because this\Nis the weirdest way
Dialogue: 0,0:47:50.16,0:47:54.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,i've ever heard anyone describe it \Nbut she's talking about eating pussy here
Dialogue: 0,0:47:54.75,0:48:00.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I really don't know who like told Jaylo\Nor whoever wrote this script that
Dialogue: 0,0:48:00.05,0:48:03.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,lesbians call that turkey time \Nbut whoever it was
Dialogue: 0,0:48:03.84,0:48:06.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,deserves to be taken out\Nbehind a barn and shot
Dialogue: 0,0:48:06.15,0:48:10.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,anyways though of course Gigli\Ndoesn't respect her sexuality
Dialogue: 0,0:48:18.80,0:48:21.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and he whines and complains \Nthroughout the whole movie
Dialogue: 0,0:48:21.38,0:48:25.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,about oooh, it's not fair that she's like\Na lesbian but i'm like attracted to her
Dialogue: 0,0:48:25.33,0:48:26.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I want to be with her
Dialogue: 0,0:48:43.04,0:48:46.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and after enough complaining ricky\Nstarts doing deeds with him
Dialogue: 0,0:48:46.69,0:48:49.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and its not like this is realistic\Nat all in any way
Dialogue: 0,0:48:49.33,0:48:55.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but in the hypothetical scenario where\Nfor some reason a lesbian had sex
Dialogue: 0,0:48:55.07,0:48:57.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with a guy. It would not be with this guy
Dialogue: 0,0:48:59.99,0:49:02.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he's always like licking \Nhis teeth and shit
Dialogue: 0,0:49:05.60,0:49:08.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but luckily there's not just \Nlesbian cringe
Dialogue: 0,0:49:11.14,0:49:13.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there's also plenty of \Nhetero sexual cringe
Dialogue: 0,0:49:15.42,0:49:16.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and gay cringe
Dialogue: 0,0:49:17.76,0:49:21.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and despite this movie literally\Nbeing about mobsters
Dialogue: 0,0:49:21.21,0:49:25.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,nothing mobster related really happens\Nin this movie
Dialogue: 0,0:49:25.27,0:49:29.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,until like the last 30 mins where for some\Nreason Al Pacino is here
Dialogue: 0,0:49:31.58,0:49:34.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm sure this is Al Pocinos favorite\Nrole of all time
Dialogue: 0,0:49:34.44,0:49:36.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,right up there next to jack and jill
Dialogue: 0,0:49:42.40,0:49:43.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but to give it to you straight
Dialogue: 0,0:49:43.86,0:49:47.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the movie ends with Gigli leaving\Nthe mentally disabled kid
Dialogue: 0,0:49:47.66,0:49:52.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,on a random beach\Nwith a cast of baywatch
Dialogue: 0,0:49:52.05,0:49:56.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and it's literally played out like its\Nsuppose to be this inspirational thing
Dialogue: 0,0:49:56.40,0:49:58.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like a tear jerker or something
Dialogue: 0,0:50:06.47,0:50:09.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,meanwhile Gigli and Ricky \Nride off into the sunset
Dialogue: 0,0:50:09.59,0:50:12.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just as she's telling him that he should\Nwear some makeup
Dialogue: 0,0:50:15.85,0:50:17.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,do not watch this movie
Dialogue: 0,0:50:17.33,0:50:20.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you will get a UTI\Nor that other thing
Dialogue: 0,0:50:29.42,0:50:32.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[evasive] ok first of all this movie is\Ncatwoman in name only
Dialogue: 0,0:50:32.59,0:50:35.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,despite being a DC comics movie\Nthe catwoman in this movie
Dialogue: 0,0:50:35.81,0:50:38.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,has pretty much nothing to do with the\Ncatwoman from batman
Dialogue: 0,0:50:38.58,0:50:41.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this character has a different name\Nlives in a different city
Dialogue: 0,0:50:41.79,0:50:45.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and gets her cat super powers from a magic\Ncat burping in her mouth
Dialogue: 0,0:50:45.83,0:50:49.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's just so stupid\Nit's actually really fun to watch
Dialogue: 0,0:50:49.94,0:50:54.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,especially the CGI Halle Berry during the\Naction scenes it's so funny
Dialogue: 0,0:50:54.02,0:50:57.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as you might expect this movie bombed hard\Nprobably because they put it out in
Dialogue: 0,0:50:57.69,0:50:59.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,theaters around the same time as\Nspider man 2
Dialogue: 0,0:51:06.17,0:51:08.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its a pretty infamous \Nsuperhero movie now
Dialogue: 0,0:51:08.14,0:51:11.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the director Pitof was basically\Nlaughed out of hollywood
Dialogue: 0,0:51:11.14,0:51:12.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,never directed a movie again
Dialogue: 0,0:51:12.89,0:51:15.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but Halle Berry embraced \Nthis movie was a flop
Dialogue: 0,0:51:15.43,0:51:18.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and she even showed up in person\Nto accept her Razzie award
Dialogue: 0,0:51:38.56,0:51:39.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,dirty love is a
Dialogue: 0,0:51:40.68,0:51:41.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"comedy"
Dialogue: 0,0:51:41.77,0:51:43.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,created by Melissa McCarthy's cousin
Dialogue: 0,0:51:43.51,0:51:47.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,notorious anti vaccer and masked \Nsinger judge Jenny McCarthy
Dialogue: 0,0:51:47.27,0:51:51.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,she stars as a woman who gets dumped\Nby her boyfriend and her life falls apart
Dialogue: 0,0:51:51.42,0:51:54.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its really unhinged but not in a funny\Nkind of way
Dialogue: 0,0:51:54.20,0:51:57.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,more of a i'm bored and uncomfortable\Nand I want to leave the room kind of way
Dialogue: 0,0:51:57.91,0:52:00.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I actually had a hard time finding\Nclips from this movie online
Dialogue: 0,0:52:00.88,0:52:03.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because its pretty obscure\Nand nobody likes it
Dialogue: 0,0:52:03.18,0:52:07.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its mostly badly delivered jokes\Nand gross out humor with a feminine spin
Dialogue: 0,0:52:07.71,0:52:12.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and by feminine spin I of course mean\Nperiod jokes like this scene where a
Dialogue: 0,0:52:12.43,0:52:15.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,bleeding Jenny McCarthy goes to the\Ngrocery store in a white skirt
Dialogue: 0,0:52:15.51,0:52:17.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and no underwear \Nand almost bleeds out on the floor
Dialogue: 0,0:52:17.68,0:52:19.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you know, relatable comedy for women
Dialogue: 0,0:52:19.85,0:52:23.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just girly thing\N#justgirlythings
Dialogue: 0,0:52:23.38,0:52:24.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just girly things
Dialogue: 0,0:52:24.59,0:52:27.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's a girly thing so you wouldn't\Nunderstand boys
Dialogue: 0,0:52:27.53,0:52:29.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's a girly thing
Dialogue: 0,0:52:29.07,0:52:32.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,#justgirlythings\Nit's a girly thing
Dialogue: 0,0:52:32.17,0:52:37.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's a girly thing\N#justgirlythings
Dialogue: 0,0:52:45.26,0:52:47.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so this is a sequel to basic instincts
Dialogue: 0,0:52:47.62,0:52:50.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,an erotic murder mystery thriller\Nfrom the early 90s
Dialogue: 0,0:52:50.17,0:52:53.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its maybe best remembered today for the\Nscene where newman from Seinfeld
Dialogue: 0,0:52:53.42,0:52:57.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,sees Sharon Stones' bare uncensored tits\Nin an interrogation room
Dialogue: 0,0:52:57.02,0:53:00.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the original was nominated for a few\Nrazzies in its day but it was a
Dialogue: 0,0:53:00.22,0:53:01.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,massive box office hit
Dialogue: 0,0:53:01.58,0:53:04.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and is today remembered as a pretty solid\NNeo Noir thriller
Dialogue: 0,0:53:04.48,0:53:08.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,now basic instinct 2 on the other hand\Nonly exists because Sharon Stone
Dialogue: 0,0:53:08.28,0:53:10.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was promised $14 million\Nto star in the movie
Dialogue: 0,0:53:10.89,0:53:14.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and when the producers tried to cancel it\Nshe sued them to force them to make it
Dialogue: 0,0:53:19.44,0:53:22.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its kind of hard to talk about this movie\Nwithout spoiling a bit of the original
Dialogue: 0,0:53:22.65,0:53:25.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but I will say that overall\NI didn't hate this movie
Dialogue: 0,0:53:25.38,0:53:29.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but I also barely remember anything about\Nthe plot and I only saw it a couple months ago
Dialogue: 0,0:53:29.59,0:53:33.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it rehashes a lot of the same story, beats\Nand plot points as the original
Dialogue: 0,0:53:33.14,0:53:34.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just not as good
Dialogue: 0,0:53:34.67,0:53:38.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,would I call it a terrible movie?\Nno, not really
Dialogue: 0,0:53:38.06,0:53:41.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but compared to the original \Nits pretty bland and forgettable
Dialogue: 0,0:53:41.06,0:53:42.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but that's what happens when your\Nonly reason for
Dialogue: 0,0:53:42.84,0:53:44.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,making a movie is to \Navoid a massive lawsuit
Dialogue: 0,0:53:44.81,0:53:47.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,got to love showbiz baby
Dialogue: 0,0:53:57.40,0:54:00.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I know who killed me is a horror\Nmovie starring Lindsay Lohan as a girl
Dialogue: 0,0:54:00.74,0:54:02.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who was kidnapped \Nby a serial killer
Dialogue: 0,0:54:02.47,0:54:05.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but survives and wakes up in a hospital\Nsaying shes someone else
Dialogue: 0,0:54:05.71,0:54:11.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this movie was released on july 27, 2007\Nright at the peak of the tabloid frenzy
Dialogue: 0,0:54:11.15,0:54:14.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,about Lindsay Lohan and her struggles \Nwith alcohol and drug addiction
Dialogue: 0,0:54:14.28,0:54:16.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there was a lot of attention on the movie\Nwhile it was filming
Dialogue: 0,0:54:16.78,0:54:21.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,especially because Lohan checked into\Nrehab the first time a month into production
Dialogue: 0,0:54:21.02,0:54:24.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the film set was so swarmed with paparazzi\Nthat some of them even showed up in
Dialogue: 0,0:54:24.62,0:54:26.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the background of a few \Nshots in the movie
Dialogue: 0,0:54:26.42,0:54:30.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,then a couple months after filming wrapped\NLohan was arrested for drunk driving
Dialogue: 0,0:54:30.10,0:54:33.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,then on July 24th, just 3 days before\Nthe movie was released
Dialogue: 0,0:54:33.62,0:54:37.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Lohan was arrested for drunk driving again\Nand couldn't even attend the premier
Dialogue: 0,0:54:37.58,0:54:41.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,all of this negative media attention\Nmade Lindsay Lohan enemy #1 in hollywood
Dialogue: 0,0:54:41.94,0:54:43.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,critics eviscerated this movie
Dialogue: 0,0:54:43.88,0:54:46.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but in the years since its release\Nthis film has become a bit of a
Dialogue: 0,0:54:46.76,0:54:48.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,cult classic with horror movie fans
Dialogue: 0,0:54:48.66,0:54:51.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and its been screened in theaters many\Ntimes over the last decade
Dialogue: 0,0:54:51.63,0:54:55.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,ive seen a lot of people in line compared\Nto giallo movies, an itallian film genre
Dialogue: 0,0:54:55.68,0:55:00.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,popular in the 60s and 70s that mixed elements\Nof murder mysteries, slashers, and erotica
Dialogue: 0,0:55:00.97,0:55:03.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the influence of giallo is definitely\Npresent here
Dialogue: 0,0:55:03.64,0:55:08.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its a stylish weird thriller and Lohans background\Nmade her kind of perfect for the role
Dialogue: 0,0:55:08.33,0:55:12.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as the main character quickly transforms from\Na sweet highschool girl
Dialogue: 0,0:55:12.17,0:55:14.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,into a deeply traumatized woman\Nwith a robotic hand
Dialogue: 0,0:55:14.78,0:55:17.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its definitely not for everyone\Nmyself included
Dialogue: 0,0:55:17.79,0:55:21.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but if you're into weird gory horror\Nmovies there's a lot to vibe with here
Dialogue: 0,0:55:21.11,0:55:23.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its a much better movie than norbit\Nthat's for sure
Dialogue: 0,0:55:23.50,0:55:24.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean have you ever seen norbit
Dialogue: 0,0:55:44.31,0:55:48.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the love guru is a movie written by,\Nproduced by, and starring Mike Meyers
Dialogue: 0,0:55:48.68,0:55:52.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that's mostly remembered today as the movie\Nthat completely tanked his career
Dialogue: 0,0:55:52.01,0:55:54.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and caused him to step away from hollywood\Nfor 8 years
Dialogue: 0,0:55:54.90,0:55:57.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,critics and audiences both hated it
Dialogue: 0,0:55:57.43,0:56:02.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with critics calling it lazy, immature,\Nmindless, pitiable, insulting, painful
Dialogue: 0,0:56:02.00,0:56:06.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,gross, contemptuous, racist, and unlikable\Namong many other things
Dialogue: 0,0:56:06.09,0:56:09.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but don't take their word for it\Ntake my word for it
Dialogue: 0,0:56:11.64,0:56:13.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't really have any other words for it\Nthat pretty much sums it up
Dialogue: 0,0:56:13.100,0:56:15.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,anyway here's a scene that they \Nused in the trailer
Dialogue: 0,0:56:15.71,0:56:17.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,ohhh, how did you get there?
Dialogue: 0,0:56:19.20,0:56:21.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this little guy scared the crap\Nout of me
Dialogue: 0,0:56:21.25,0:56:23.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,think i'm going to have to do a panty\Ncheck, I might have some
Dialogue: 0,0:56:23.48,0:56:24.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,monkey monsters back there
Dialogue: 0,0:56:24.98,0:56:26.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who is this prick
Dialogue: 0,0:56:27.42,0:56:30.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,well, how do you do, shrimp?
Dialogue: 0,0:56:31.28,0:56:32.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,what'd you call me
Dialogue: 0,0:56:32.67,0:56:34.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,im sorry, i didn't catch your gnome\Nname!
Dialogue: 0,0:56:36.64,0:56:37.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you are a midget
Dialogue: 0,0:56:37.98,0:56:41.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so the plot of this movie is Mike Meyers\Nplays this self help guru
Dialogue: 0,0:56:41.75,0:56:44.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,named maurice Pitka\Nwho was raised in india
Dialogue: 0,0:56:44.54,0:56:47.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,wears a chastity belt and dreams\Nof being on Oprah
Dialogue: 0,0:56:47.72,0:56:50.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he's hired by the Toronto maple leafs\Nto help their star player
Dialogue: 0,0:56:50.67,0:56:52.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,get back together with his wife
Dialogue: 0,0:56:52.00,0:56:55.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because he is the love guru therefore\Nonly he can save their marriage
Dialogue: 0,0:56:55.63,0:56:59.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its basically a one note movie\Nthat feels like it was written by a 10yr old boy
Dialogue: 0,0:56:59.83,0:57:01.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,every scene goes on for way too long
Dialogue: 0,0:57:01.68,0:57:05.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Mike Meyers keeps laughing at his own jokes\Nand pretty much every line is about
Dialogue: 0,0:57:05.46,0:57:07.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,poop, pee, farts, balls or dicks
Dialogue: 0,0:57:07.92,0:57:10.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with many of the characters names being dick jokes
Dialogue: 0,0:57:10.54,0:57:15.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we got tugginmypudha, coach cherkov, Le Coq\Ndick pants
Dialogue: 0,0:57:15.84,0:57:17.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,{\i1}starts laughing{\i0}
Dialogue: 0,0:57:19.73,0:57:22.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its not funny that John Olivers\Nnamed Dick Pants
Dialogue: 0,0:57:22.60,0:57:25.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,{\i1}starts laughing again{\i0}\Nits not...
Dialogue: 0,0:57:32.62,0:57:36.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ok, ill be the first to say that\NI don't think any of the transformers movies
Dialogue: 0,0:57:36.36,0:57:37.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,are particularly good
Dialogue: 0,0:57:37.75,0:57:40.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that being said, transformers\Nrevenge of the fallen is definitely
Dialogue: 0,0:57:40.84,0:57:41.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the worst one
Dialogue: 0,0:57:41.95,0:57:44.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,if only for how offensive and annoying\Nit is
Dialogue: 0,0:57:44.66,0:57:49.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,pretty much every transformer introduced in\Nthis movie either talks with a racist accent
Dialogue: 0,0:57:49.09,0:57:53.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or the most annoying cartoon voice imaginable\Nand when it isn't being annoying or racist
Dialogue: 0,0:57:53.81,0:57:55.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its doing shit like this
Dialogue: 0,0:58:07.39,0:58:11.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,{\i1}sighs deeply{\i0}
Dialogue: 0,0:58:13.15,0:58:16.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like is it any wonder\NMegan Fox quit the series after this
Dialogue: 0,0:58:16.48,0:58:20.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,sadly though this movie ended up making\N$836 million which was about
Dialogue: 0,0:58:20.78,0:58:24.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,$100 million more than up made \Nthat same year
Dialogue: 0,0:58:51.29,0:58:54.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,what can I even say about this movie\Nthat hasn't been said a thousand times already
Dialogue: 0,0:58:54.96,0:58:58.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this live action trash fire\Ndirected by M Night Shyamalan
Dialogue: 0,0:58:58.28,0:59:01.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,attempted to condense the first season\Nof an amazing animated tv show
Dialogue: 0,0:59:01.90,0:59:04.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,into a 90 min CGI filled mess
Dialogue: 0,0:59:04.45,0:59:08.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,maybe if you watched this never having\Nseen the original series it's just another
Dialogue: 0,0:59:08.89,0:59:14.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,lame hollywood fantasy action movie but for fans\Nof the series this was offensively bad
Dialogue: 0,0:59:14.06,0:59:17.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the creators of the show were not allowed\Nto give any input on the movies development
Dialogue: 0,0:59:17.73,0:59:20.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but loving characters were made\None dimensional and pointless
Dialogue: 0,0:59:20.82,0:59:25.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,major plot points were skipped over\Ncharacters names are pronounced wrong
Dialogue: 0,0:59:25.09,0:59:26.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like how do you even screw that up
Dialogue: 0,0:59:26.95,0:59:29.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this movie made a lot of money\Nbut it was so hated by audiences
Dialogue: 0,0:59:29.93,0:59:33.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that paramount must have known they couldn't\Nfool people twice and cancelled plans
Dialogue: 0,0:59:33.50,0:59:35.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to adapt the other two seasons
Dialogue: 0,0:59:35.32,0:59:39.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,effectively sinking the career of the kid\Nwho played Aang before it even began
Dialogue: 0,0:59:39.05,0:59:40.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's just sad
Dialogue: 0,0:59:40.25,0:59:45.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the whole movie is a sad waste of source material\Nyou'd probably have a better time playing the
Dialogue: 0,0:59:45.18,0:59:48.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,official last airbender Wii game then you\Nwould watching this movie
Dialogue: 0,0:59:55.18,0:59:56.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,ok maybe not
Dialogue: 0,1:00:02.89,1:00:07.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,{\i1}somber music playing{\i0}
Dialogue: 0,1:00:29.30,1:00:32.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,alright razzies\Nrespectfully, what the fuck
Dialogue: 0,1:00:32.56,1:00:37.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,listen, I wouldn't call myself a twilight fan\Ni've never read the books and didn't watch
Dialogue: 0,1:00:37.06,1:00:41.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the movies until recently but even I know\Nthe last movie of the twilight series isn't
Dialogue: 0,1:00:41.66,1:00:42.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that bad a movie
Dialogue: 0,1:00:42.74,1:00:46.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its ridiculous sure but out of all the movies\Nin the series it's definitely the most exciting
Dialogue: 0,1:00:46.94,1:00:49.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and most interesting entry\Naside from the first one
Dialogue: 0,1:00:49.24,1:00:52.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,obviously they gave it worst picture to\Nsort of dig at the entire series
Dialogue: 0,1:00:52.63,1:00:55.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,since none of the others have won worst\Npicture before but come on
Dialogue: 0,1:00:55.78,1:00:58.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,breaking dawn part 2 is fun
Dialogue: 0,1:00:58.16,1:01:02.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its got a big fight scene on a frozen lake\Nits got a girl named renesmee
Dialogue: 0,1:01:02.11,1:01:06.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it concludes one of the most iconic\Nand stupid blockbuster movie series of all time
Dialogue: 0,1:01:06.62,1:01:10.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it is so entertaining and over the top that\Neven if you hate twilight and everything about it
Dialogue: 0,1:01:10.87,1:01:14.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you cant tell me that this movie is worst\Nthan the Adam Sandler movie where
Dialogue: 0,1:01:14.19,1:01:16.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he shows a 13yr old impregnating his teacher
Dialogue: 0,1:01:17.96,1:01:19.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you can't tell me that
Dialogue: 0,1:01:19.99,1:01:20.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because you'd be wrong
Dialogue: 0,1:01:29.69,1:01:32.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,let me start this one off by showing\Nyou a list of people who were involved in this movie
Dialogue: 0,1:01:35.16,1:01:36.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and that's not even all of them
Dialogue: 0,1:01:36.24,1:01:39.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,movie 43 is a compilation of raunchy\Ncomedy sketches
Dialogue: 0,1:01:39.50,1:01:40.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,each directed by different people
Dialogue: 0,1:01:40.88,1:01:43.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,made by an impossibly cheap budget of\N$6 million
Dialogue: 0,1:01:43.90,1:01:47.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this thing took 3 whole years to film\Nbecause the producers worked around
Dialogue: 0,1:01:47.81,1:01:51.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,actors schedules to maximize how many\Nfamous people could show up in this
Dialogue: 0,1:01:51.42,1:01:55.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the sketches themselves are a relentless\Nonslaught of dirty shock humor
Dialogue: 0,1:01:55.67,1:01:58.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there's one where Hugh Jackman has balls\Non his face
Dialogue: 0,1:01:58.30,1:02:01.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there's one where Chloe Grace Moretz\Nsmears period blood on the wall
Dialogue: 0,1:02:01.79,1:02:04.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there's one where a horny cat pisses on\Nelizabeth banks
Dialogue: 0,1:02:04.38,1:02:08.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there's one where Karen Culkin says he wants \Nto leave a hickey on Emma Stones' vagina
Dialogue: 0,1:02:08.45,1:02:12.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,my personal favorite is where Anna Faris asks\NChris Prat to poop on her
Dialogue: 0,1:02:12.60,1:02:16.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,during sex so he takes some poop viagra\Nand then gets hit by a car
Dialogue: 0,1:02:21.88,1:02:25.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,if you're feeling sadistic throw this on\Nat your next bad movie night with friends
Dialogue: 0,1:02:25.56,1:02:27.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its got a little something for everyone
Dialogue: 0,1:02:43.05,1:02:46.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so if you're unfamiliar\NKirk Cameron was a child actor in the 80s
Dialogue: 0,1:02:46.46,1:02:49.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who took a hard right turn into\Nevangelical christianity
Dialogue: 0,1:02:49.21,1:02:53.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and has since appeared in almost exclusively\Nlow budget christian movies and radio programs
Dialogue: 0,1:02:53.46,1:02:57.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,today he is mostly know for his\Ninflammatory publicity stunts
Dialogue: 0,1:02:57.14,1:03:02.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like in 2020 when he organized massive caroling\Nevents in LA to protest covid restrictions
Dialogue: 0,1:03:02.93,1:03:06.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which he called communism disguised as\Npublic health
Dialogue: 0,1:03:06.12,1:03:08.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you know the type\Nhe's a nutcase
Dialogue: 0,1:03:08.02,1:03:11.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and his movie had been dumped on\Na hundred times by youtubers already
Dialogue: 0,1:03:11.24,1:03:14.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because for awhile this was the lowest\Nrated movie in IMDB
Dialogue: 0,1:03:14.53,1:03:17.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with an average rating of 1.3/10
Dialogue: 0,1:03:17.20,1:03:20.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which he claimed was a result of\Nan atheist conspiracy on reddit
Dialogue: 0,1:03:20.35,1:03:22.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,basically the whole movie takes place\Nin one house
Dialogue: 0,1:03:22.54,1:03:26.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and almost every scene is him using\Nweird circular reasoning to explain
Dialogue: 0,1:03:26.30,1:03:30.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,how non christian christmas traditions had\Nactually been christian all along
Dialogue: 0,1:03:30.04,1:03:34.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like how christmas trees were gods idea\Nbecause god created trees
Dialogue: 0,1:03:34.10,1:03:38.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or how the holiday isn't actually materialistic\Nbecause the ability to buy gifts
Dialogue: 0,1:03:38.28,1:03:40.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is gods gift to humanity
Dialogue: 0,1:03:40.43,1:03:41.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's just boring
Dialogue: 0,1:03:41.48,1:03:45.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's a very boring movie where nothing\Nhappens and everyone is just sitting
Dialogue: 0,1:03:45.20,1:03:47.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or standing around not doing anything
Dialogue: 0,1:03:47.09,1:03:50.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the only remotely entertaining part of the\Nwhole movie is when all the extras
Dialogue: 0,1:03:50.03,1:03:51.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,have an epic dance party at the end
Dialogue: 0,1:04:26.38,1:04:30.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,fant 4 stic is a classic case of too\Nmany people having their hands on the same movie
Dialogue: 0,1:04:30.60,1:04:32.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the writers disagree on everything
Dialogue: 0,1:04:32.29,1:04:36.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the director Josh Tranks slept with a loaded\Ngun on him because he got death threats
Dialogue: 0,1:04:36.46,1:04:37.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for casting Michael B Jordan
Dialogue: 0,1:04:37.98,1:04:42.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,fox executives had whole scenes cut out and\Nother scenes re-shot without Tranks
Dialogue: 0,1:04:42.68,1:04:45.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,approval because they thought his version\Nwas too dark
Dialogue: 0,1:04:45.17,1:04:49.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Trank also put out a tweet right before\Nthe movie came out basically disowning it
Dialogue: 0,1:04:49.06,1:04:52.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the end result of all of this was an ugly\Nboring mess of a movie
Dialogue: 0,1:04:52.56,1:04:55.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,where there's no real stakes \Nor tension anywhere
Dialogue: 0,1:04:55.34,1:04:58.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,they don't even become superheros until\Nhalfway through the movie
Dialogue: 0,1:04:58.01,1:05:01.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and most of the time they're just standing\Naround talking and not doing anything
Dialogue: 0,1:05:01.23,1:05:03.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you can see the remnants \Nof a decent movie in here
Dialogue: 0,1:05:03.28,1:05:06.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like in the scene where Miles Teller\Nwakes up on a hospital bed
Dialogue: 0,1:05:06.21,1:05:07.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,looking like Lanky Kong
Dialogue: 0,1:05:07.33,1:05:10.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but we'll never know what the movie was\Nsuppose to be because nobody cares
Dialogue: 0,1:05:10.85,1:05:13.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there's nobody out there saying \N#releasethetrankcut
Dialogue: 0,1:05:48.76,1:05:53.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so 2015 was another tie with 50 shades\Nof grey also being awarded worst picture
Dialogue: 0,1:05:53.52,1:05:55.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this is another movie where im like
Dialogue: 0,1:05:55.25,1:05:58.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,what can I possibly say about this\Nthat hasn't been said already
Dialogue: 0,1:05:58.88,1:06:02.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its based on an erotic novel that started\Nout as a twilight fan fiction
Dialogue: 0,1:06:02.40,1:06:06.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the stars have no chemistry and nothing\Nabout their relationship is believable
Dialogue: 0,1:06:06.16,1:06:09.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the movie spawned that \Nlove me like you do song
Dialogue: 0,1:06:09.02,1:06:12.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that has haunted retail workers for\Nalmost a decade now
Dialogue: 0,1:06:12.04,1:06:14.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's just a bad movie\Nit's boring and bad
Dialogue: 0,1:06:14.66,1:06:16.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and it made over $500 million
Dialogue: 0,1:06:16.38,1:06:19.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so rather than repeat the same things a\Nhundred other youtubers have said
Dialogue: 0,1:06:19.70,1:06:21.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,i'll just leave you with a little mental image
Dialogue: 0,1:06:21.73,1:06:25.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,see this movie came out on \Nvalentines day 2015
Dialogue: 0,1:06:25.65,1:06:29.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want you to imagine for a second all the\Nthousand of couples who went to see this
Dialogue: 0,1:06:29.19,1:06:30.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,on valentines day
Dialogue: 0,1:06:30.94,1:06:34.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want you to visualize Kaylyynn and Greg\Nfrom sugar land texas who went
Dialogue: 0,1:06:34.53,1:06:37.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to see this at the local AMC\Non valentines day
Dialogue: 0,1:06:38.09,1:06:41.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want you to visualize Kaylyynn giving Greg\Na dry handjob in the back of the theatre
Dialogue: 0,1:06:41.74,1:06:42.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,40 mins into the movie
Dialogue: 0,1:06:43.62,1:06:45.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want you to visualize them going to\Napplebees after
Dialogue: 0,1:06:45.82,1:06:48.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to eat a slightly burnt chicken breast and\Nsome unseasoned broccoli
Dialogue: 0,1:06:49.79,1:06:50.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want you to visualize
Dialogue: 0,1:07:00.33,1:07:04.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,if you don't know already Dinesh D'Souza\Nis a far right political commentator
Dialogue: 0,1:07:04.03,1:07:07.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who has been releasing propaganda films\Nevery year since 2012
Dialogue: 0,1:07:07.45,1:07:10.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he also pleaded guilty to campaign\Nfinance fraud in 2014
Dialogue: 0,1:07:10.79,1:07:14.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and was sentenced 5 years probation\Nduring which he made Hillary's america
Dialogue: 0,1:07:14.97,1:07:17.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the secret history of the democratic party
Dialogue: 0,1:07:17.19,1:07:21.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,released in the summer of 2016\Nhillarys americas a movie that claims
Dialogue: 0,1:07:21.45,1:07:25.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its a documentary but aside from a few\Nnews clips and scripted sounding interviews
Dialogue: 0,1:07:25.58,1:07:29.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,much of the movie is either historical\Nreenactments or just Souza talking to
Dialogue: 0,1:07:29.44,1:07:32.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,terrible actors trying to pass it off as\Ndocumentary footage
Dialogue: 0,1:07:32.94,1:07:35.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the movie opens with D' Souza being\Nsentenced for fraud
Dialogue: 0,1:07:35.78,1:07:38.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which he claims was a democratic\Nconspiracy to shut him up
Dialogue: 0,1:07:38.79,1:07:42.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and from there he goes to prison and starts\Ninterviewing other prisoners about how
Dialogue: 0,1:07:42.50,1:07:43.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,gangs work
Dialogue: 0,1:07:58.87,1:08:03.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,later on he visits the democrat national\Nheadquarters and it's all done up to look
Dialogue: 0,1:08:03.07,1:08:06.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like a high tech museum of the glory of\Nthe democratic party
Dialogue: 0,1:08:06.28,1:08:09.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then he sneaks into the restricted \Npart of the building
Dialogue: 0,1:08:09.10,1:08:13.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and breaks into the secret archives to \Nreveal the secret information
Dialogue: 0,1:08:13.82,1:08:17.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that is literally just in the curriculum\Nin 8th US history
Dialogue: 0,1:08:17.61,1:08:22.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like hey guys, did you know that most of the\Nslave owners in the civil war were democrats
Dialogue: 0,1:08:22.54,1:08:27.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,wow isn't that crazy?\Nhow come nobody's talking about this
Dialogue: 0,1:08:27.10,1:08:31.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the sad truth is this movie sold\N$13 million worth of tickets when it came out
Dialogue: 0,1:08:31.91,1:08:36.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which means that hundreds of thousands of\Nvery gullible americans saw this in theatres
Dialogue: 0,1:08:36.59,1:08:39.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and many probably dragged their \Nimpressionable kids with them
Dialogue: 0,1:08:39.67,1:08:43.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when all those kids wanted to do was play\Nthe new pokemon go game that just came out
Dialogue: 0,1:08:43.35,1:08:47.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its depressing to think about\N2016 was a very dark time
Dialogue: 0,1:09:01.61,1:09:02.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,hey guys\Nim sorry
Dialogue: 0,1:09:02.70,1:09:04.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I can't talk about the emoji movie
Dialogue: 0,1:09:04.33,1:09:09.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you see, on a hot summer day in 2017\NI actually saw the emoji movie in theatres
Dialogue: 0,1:09:09.35,1:09:12.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in a room full of screaming sugar'd\Nup children
Dialogue: 0,1:09:12.08,1:09:14.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and if you think this movie looks bad\Nenough on its own
Dialogue: 0,1:09:14.13,1:09:18.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,try watching it completely sober while a 7yr\Nold kicks the back of your chair the whole time
Dialogue: 0,1:09:18.49,1:09:23.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I just can't relive the trauma of that day\Nagain so I passed this one off to trash guy
Dialogue: 0,1:09:24.36,1:09:28.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[trash guy] young junko\Nhe was the best lawyer who ever lived
Dialogue: 0,1:09:28.18,1:09:31.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but decidingly the hammer of justice\Nmade him his walnut
Dialogue: 0,1:09:32.58,1:09:34.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and under the pressure he cracked
Dialogue: 0,1:09:35.01,1:09:37.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,by his side he had only left this note
Dialogue: 0,1:09:38.00,1:09:41.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,sad face, sad face, cry face, trash can,\Nwater gun, squirt, squirt, sad face
Dialogue: 0,1:09:41.73,1:09:45.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,*watch The Emoji Movie in theaters\NJuly 28 2017 for more info
Dialogue: 0,1:09:46.03,1:09:49.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Emoji movie is like the cinematic equivalent\Nof seeing an AD for Cricket wireless
Dialogue: 0,1:09:49.91,1:09:52.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,on the side of the bus\Nit's the same artistic merit
Dialogue: 0,1:09:52.66,1:09:56.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its hard to not look at this movie without\Nthinking of the evolution of 3D animation
Dialogue: 0,1:09:56.11,1:09:58.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as a craft in the last 4 years
Dialogue: 0,1:09:58.14,1:10:01.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the way that the medium improved over time\Nnot just in terms of vitality
Dialogue: 0,1:10:01.34,1:10:05.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but the heart felt boundary pushing\Nstorytelling that made animated characters
Dialogue: 0,1:10:05.06,1:10:06.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,come across as more tangible
Dialogue: 0,1:10:06.47,1:10:09.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in exploring the worlds they inhabited\Nin a serel way
Dialogue: 0,1:10:09.57,1:10:13.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and all that, all that led to this\Na movie about emojis
Dialogue: 0,1:10:14.22,1:10:17.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,on a kids cellphone\Nits so in personable
Dialogue: 0,1:10:17.13,1:10:20.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its not like toy story where Andy\Nand the toys have a clear relationship
Dialogue: 0,1:10:20.19,1:10:24.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in emoji land you get scanned whenever the\Nkid picks you for a text message
Dialogue: 0,1:10:24.02,1:10:26.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like why is this kid only texting in emojis
Dialogue: 0,1:10:26.84,1:10:28.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he's like a little, a little man slut
Dialogue: 0,1:10:28.51,1:10:32.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the whole plot being he wants to text\Na girl in his class and that's it
Dialogue: 0,1:10:32.50,1:10:35.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that's it. He has no connection to\Nthese main essential characters
Dialogue: 0,1:10:35.79,1:10:38.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,they're just a button on his phone\Nits so pointless
Dialogue: 0,1:10:38.27,1:10:40.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the worlds not interesting at all
Dialogue: 0,1:10:40.72,1:10:45.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the main character gene is suppose to be\Nthe meh emoji but he's malfunctioning
Dialogue: 0,1:10:45.02,1:10:48.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so he goes on a quest with hand emoji\Nand jailbreak
Dialogue: 0,1:10:48.18,1:10:52.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,an elite emo hacker girl emoji with blue\Nhair who can access the cloud and
Dialogue: 0,1:10:52.50,1:10:55.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,see all the rule 34 of herself \Nmade over the years
Dialogue: 0,1:10:57.64,1:11:01.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its a movie made specifically for loud\Ndrunk parents circuit 2017 to take
Dialogue: 0,1:11:01.66,1:11:04.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,their ipad kids to so they can run around\Nthe theatre and pick their ass
Dialogue: 0,1:11:04.61,1:11:06.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,while they shove a bunch of ads at\Ntheir eyeballs
Dialogue: 0,1:11:06.25,1:11:10.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you got whole scenes explaining \Ncandy crush and just dance
Dialogue: 0,1:11:10.08,1:11:15.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and spotify. its as shameless in corporate\Nas an animated movie could possibly be
Dialogue: 0,1:11:15.39,1:11:19.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,i'm sure some belligerently wasted\Nparent in the theatre howled with laughter
Dialogue: 0,1:11:19.08,1:11:21.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when james corden hand emoji said\Nbye Felisha
Dialogue: 0,1:11:23.21,1:11:26.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I wouldn't know though because the first\Ntime I saw emoji movie was at 2am
Dialogue: 0,1:11:26.22,1:11:29.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when I hacked amazon fire stick plugable\Ninto my friends CRT
Dialogue: 0,1:11:29.56,1:11:32.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that's just about the viewing experience\Nthis movie deserves
Dialogue: 0,1:11:32.95,1:11:36.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[evasive] but hey for as much as a soulless\Ncash grab the emoji movie was
Dialogue: 0,1:11:36.83,1:11:38.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there is one good thing about it
Dialogue: 0,1:11:38.95,1:11:43.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and that's that it is inadvertently responsible\Nfor causing jordan peele to make get out
Dialogue: 0,1:11:57.88,1:12:00.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,holmes and watson was the much \Nanticipated reunion between
Dialogue: 0,1:12:00.61,1:12:05.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,John C Reilly and Will Ferrell a duo that starred\Nin a couple smash hit comedies in the mid 2000s
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so when this movie released to atrocious reviews\Nit left some people scratching their head
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,wondering how two guys who worked so\Nwell together before
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,could fuck up a movie this bad
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and trust me no matter what your sense of\Nhumor is this movie is bad
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its not funny at all. not even a little bit\Nits just boring and hard to watch
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the plots is impossible to follow\Nthe jokes fall flat on their face
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and some of them were already dated\Nby the time the movie came out
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,compared to teledated nights and step brothers
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,everything about their delivery here just\Nfeels off
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the blame probably rests with\Nwriter/ director Etan Cohen
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,not to be confused with\NEtan coen, no
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Etan Coen is a writer that built a pretty\Ndecent resume in the 90s
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and 200s and decided to branch out into \Ndirecting with get hard in 2015
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,holmes and watson was his 2nd attempt at\Ndirecting and possibly his last because
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the movie just barely didn't break even and\Nsince its release coen seems to have
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,returned exclusively to writing
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,my theory is the man didn't know how to\Ndirect Will Ferrell and John C Reilly
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think he just got them together and \Nassumed their chemistry would be enough
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to carry the movie because the whole thing\Njust feels like he dressed them up in
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,victorian era cloths and said \Njust do whatever you want
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we will edit it down to just the funny parts
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then surprise not of it was funny
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,cats is a hilarious movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it is so funny for all the wrong reasons\NI saw this in theatres when it came out
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,after rating a couple of very powerful\Nweed gummies and it is
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,an experience I will remember for the\Nrest of my life
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its unlike any other movie ever made\Nit really is
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,released at the tail end of 2019\Ncats was an act of pure huberous
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,from director Tom Hooper who was well\Nknown in hollywood for directing
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the kings speech, les miserables, and\Nthe danish girl
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,while I guess tommy boy got pretty full\Nof himself after all those award winners
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because for his next project he proceeded\Nto blow $100 million on a film adaptation
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of cats the musical
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,behind the scenes hooper rushed the movie\Nout the door to release in time for christmas
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and in the process treated the animators\Nlike complete shit
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,anonymous sources later reported that\Nhooper knew nothing about animation
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,made them work 90 hour weeks for months\Nand was horrible, disrespectful, demeaning
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and condescending toward everyone
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,one source said that hooper talked about\Nthe animators like they were garbage and
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,even compared their time working on cats\Nto slavery
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its been a few years now since cats
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,released and Tom Hooper hasn't been heard\Nfrom since
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so I think its safe to assume those\Nallegations were completely true
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and he wont be making a comeback\Nanytime soon
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,anyway I just wanted to play you a song \Nfrom the movie but youtube will probably
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,demonetize me if I did that so instead i'm\Ngoing to play you a
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,public service announcement from the 80s
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so absolute proof is not a movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for the first time in razzie history the\Nrazzies gave worst picture to something
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that was not a movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this is a 2 hour long special that aired\Non one american news in February 2021
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,where Mike Lindell the my pillow\Nguy bought air time to prove that
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,2020 election was hacked by china\Nusing statistics that were proven
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to be fake and interviewing experts\Nthat don't have any real credentials
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this special was also uploaded on youtube\Nbut was quickly taken down for spreading
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,false information. I was hoping it would\Nbe at least unintentionally funny
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but it was just really boring to watch
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its mostly the my pillow guy saying\N"wow"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,talking about voting data that was given\Nto him by a fraudster
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,at one point he brings on a guy who claims\Nhe invented email
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't know, I don't have\Nanything to say about this one
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's not a movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so this is also not a movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Diana the musical is a broadway show\Nthat was planned to open March 31, 2020
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,obviously that didn't pan out but in \Nthe summer of 2020 they were able to get
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the cast together to make a recording of\Nthe show with heavy covid restrictions
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and no audience of course. Then for some\Nbizarre reason they decided to release that
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,recording on netflix on october 2021\NA whole month before the show
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,re opened on broadway. obviously this was\Nthe dumbest possible thing they could
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,have done because why would anyone who\Nisn't a hardcore house winser fan
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,pay over $100 for a broadway ticket to\Nthis cringe fest when they could
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,watch the cringe fest for free at home
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this show was a complete flop\Nperforming to a half full theater
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,every night for a month until the\Nproducers put the show out of its misery
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and cancelled it on december 19
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,even if it hadn't been dumped on netflix\Nbefore it opened it still probably would've
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,flopped because it's still every bit\Ntone deaf as the title suggest
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the lyrics are like a 14yr old girl\Nsaw hamilton and newsies a few times
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and was like OH MY GOD\NI can do that too
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,except it wasn't written by a 14yr old girl\Nit was written by a tony award winning
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,play write in his 50s\Nhere's just an example of some of
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the lyrics that this show throws at you
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,directed by eccentric author Andrew Dominik
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,blonde is the most recent worst picture\Nwinner as the time I made this video
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and probably the most controversial winner\Nsince showgirls
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its a nearly 3hr long mt-17 rated movie\Nabout the life of Marilyn Monroe
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that takes extreme liberties with her \Nlife story because it's actually based on
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a historical fiction novel by Joyce Carol
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the reviews on this thing were all over\Nthe place.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when it premiered at the venice film\Nfestival it received a 14 min long
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,standing ovation and early critic reviews\Nwere extremely positive
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,then it released on netflix a few weeks\Nlater and the drama started
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,on the positive end the movie got\Npraised for its stunning cinematography
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and for ana de armas performance as monroe
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,on the negative end the movie was criticized\Nfor being exploitative, sexist and
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,dehumanizing and for brutally depicting\NMarilyn Monroe as a helpless girl
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,relentlessly abused by the hollywood system\Nwhen her real life story was much more
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,complicated than that and it certainly\Ndoesn't help that Andrew Dominik
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,doubled down on it after the films\Nrelease saying
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[evasive reading]
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't know about you guys
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I could speak on this movie more but\Ni don't want to
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this is the last movie on this list\Nand im tapping out
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I don't want to see any of you in\Nthe comments saying
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"ugh, ava tapping out"\N"avan not giving her real opinion"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"you're being evasive, you cant do that"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,thank god this is over
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,my eyeballs and my brain are absolutely\Nfried right now
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,i don't have a single thought left in my head
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but let me go ahead and summarize my\Nthoughts by sorting all these movies
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,into 4 categories
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,these categories are boring bad, funny bad\Nnot that bad and crimes against humanity
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and there we go
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I am evasive, thank you to my patreon\Nsupporters.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,thank you to all of you\Nfor watching
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and thank you so much for my guests to\Ncontributing to this video
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and hey, razzie people, if you're watching\Nhi
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,invite me to the show sometime maybe
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,honestly i think you guys are a little \Ncringy and you've made some very
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,questionable decisions in the past but like\Ni dont- I dont care
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in the meantime i'm going to do literally\Nanything else besides watching movies
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you know what i'm going to do
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,i'm going to go look at some clouds\Noooh, and touch grass
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,ohhh, I cent remember the last\Ntime I touched grass
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,ok i'm going to go outside look at clouds\Nand touch grass
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,ok, by guys