1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:02,380 What's up cinephiles, I'm Evasive, 2 00:00:02,380 --> 00:00:05,769 and this piece of paper right here means two things: 3 00:00:05,769 --> 00:00:08,510 Number one, I am tens of thousands of 4 00:00:08,510 --> 00:00:09,820 dollars in debt, 5 00:00:09,820 --> 00:00:13,140 and number two, I know a lot about movies. 6 00:00:13,140 --> 00:00:16,909 Since the U.S government isn't giving me any debt relief this year, 7 00:00:16,909 --> 00:00:19,669 I have no choice now but to torture myself on the Internet 8 00:00:19,669 --> 00:00:21,649 for money to pay off the loans 9 00:00:21,649 --> 00:00:23,399 I took out to go to film school. 10 00:00:23,916 --> 00:00:26,566 So for this video, I watched every movie that's ever won 11 00:00:26,566 --> 00:00:29,006 a Razzie Award for Worst Picture of the Year. 12 00:00:29,006 --> 00:00:31,196 This was an extremely painful experience 13 00:00:31,196 --> 00:00:33,257 and I regretted my decision immediately, 14 00:00:33,257 --> 00:00:35,367 but for the sake of my adoring fans 15 00:00:35,367 --> 00:00:36,407 and my bank account, 16 00:00:36,407 --> 00:00:38,547 I went ahead and watched all 46 of these 17 00:00:38,547 --> 00:00:40,367 movies so I could explain them to you. 18 00:00:40,367 --> 00:00:43,027 But after the grueling experience of watching all these, 19 00:00:43,027 --> 00:00:45,247 I'm not about to tackle this breakdown alone. 20 00:00:45,247 --> 00:00:47,827 So I went ahead and roped in another video essay girly 21 00:00:47,827 --> 00:00:49,028 and a talking trash can 22 00:00:49,028 --> 00:00:51,131 to help explain some of these movies for me. 23 00:00:53,211 --> 00:00:54,771 But before I get to the movies, 24 00:00:54,771 --> 00:00:56,511 let me explain what the Razzies are. 25 00:00:59,810 --> 00:01:02,469 The Golden Raspberry Awards are an annual event, 26 00:01:02,469 --> 00:01:04,579 usually held the night before the Oscars, 27 00:01:04,579 --> 00:01:06,959 to award the worst movies of the year. 28 00:01:06,959 --> 00:01:09,059 It was founded by Hollywood copywriter 29 00:01:09,059 --> 00:01:11,389 John Wilson and editor Maureen Murphy. 30 00:01:11,389 --> 00:01:13,819 The idea for the Razzies came about in 1980 31 00:01:13,819 --> 00:01:17,710 when Wilson saw Can't Stop the Music and Xanadu, back to back 32 00:01:17,710 --> 00:01:20,763 and hated them so much, that there ought to be an award show 33 00:01:20,763 --> 00:01:21,958 for this type of thing. 34 00:01:21,958 --> 00:01:23,458 Months later, Wilson hosted an 35 00:01:23,458 --> 00:01:25,358 Oscars watch party at his house, 36 00:01:25,358 --> 00:01:27,408 and after the Oscars had finished, 37 00:01:27,408 --> 00:01:29,938 he and Murphy passed out ballots to everyone 38 00:01:29,938 --> 00:01:31,578 for the worst movies of the year, 39 00:01:31,578 --> 00:01:33,888 and then he announced the winners. 40 00:01:33,888 --> 00:01:36,008 Over time, the ceremony grew and grew, 41 00:01:36,008 --> 00:01:39,244 and today they're considered a staple of the Hollywood award season 42 00:01:39,244 --> 00:01:41,384 as a low-budget Bizarro World Oscars 43 00:01:41,384 --> 00:01:43,346 that distributes awards in categories 44 00:01:43,346 --> 00:01:45,516 such as Worst Actor, Worst Director, 45 00:01:45,516 --> 00:01:46,946 and Worst Screenplay. 46 00:01:46,946 --> 00:01:49,626 Unlike the qualifications for voting at the Oscars, 47 00:01:49,626 --> 00:01:51,826 becoming a Razzie voter is very easy: 48 00:01:51,826 --> 00:01:53,925 either be friends with one of the producers 49 00:01:53,925 --> 00:01:56,365 or just pay a $40 membership fee. 50 00:01:56,365 --> 00:01:58,095 That's all it takes. 51 00:01:58,095 --> 00:01:59,785 So that's the story of the Razzies. 52 00:01:59,785 --> 00:02:02,208 Now are you ready to learn about every single movie 53 00:02:02,208 --> 00:02:03,608 that won Worst Picture? 54 00:02:04,838 --> 00:02:05,798 Because I wasn't. 55 00:02:05,798 --> 00:02:08,796 There's 46 of these things, so I'm going to talk about each one 56 00:02:08,796 --> 00:02:10,049 for just a minute or two 57 00:02:10,049 --> 00:02:11,536 and hand off a few to my guests 58 00:02:11,536 --> 00:02:13,536 so I don't completely lose my mind here. 59 00:02:13,536 --> 00:02:16,216 Also, I put a content warning on a bunch of these movies 60 00:02:16,216 --> 00:02:18,596 because of the sensitive subject matter I discuss. 61 00:02:18,596 --> 00:02:22,029 Not trying to traumatize anybody but myself in this video. 62 00:02:22,686 --> 00:02:24,276 Well, me and my guests. 63 00:02:25,109 --> 00:02:27,489 But I commissioned them for this, so it-it's fine. 64 00:02:37,510 --> 00:02:40,430 Anybody who can swallow 2 snowballs and a ding-dong shouldn't 65 00:02:40,430 --> 00:02:41,717 have trouble with pride. 66 00:02:41,717 --> 00:02:45,209 The first movie to win Worst Picture was Can't Stop The Music, 67 00:02:45,209 --> 00:02:49,209 A movie about the "origins" of the disco group Village People. 68 00:02:49,209 --> 00:02:53,681 I say origins in air-quotes because the Village People play themselves 69 00:02:53,681 --> 00:02:55,666 and the plot is completely made-up 70 00:02:55,666 --> 00:02:58,351 and not at all how the Village People actually formed 71 00:02:58,351 --> 00:03:02,074 The movie itself is super campy and full of these crazy musical numbers 72 00:03:02,074 --> 00:03:03,926 that are unironically kinda great. 73 00:03:03,926 --> 00:03:07,455 It's just too bad that in between those musical numbers are these scenes 74 00:03:07,455 --> 00:03:10,742 with really terrible acting that go on for way too long. 75 00:03:10,742 --> 00:03:15,618 Wait a minute! I am not taking one more step 'til I know where I'm going. 76 00:03:15,757 --> 00:03:19,422 Yeah, quit my job, and you got me walking the beat again! 77 00:03:19,422 --> 00:03:22,193 - I'm not even getting paid for it! - Hold your horses. 78 00:03:22,193 --> 00:03:24,001 I told you I had a surprise for you. 79 00:03:24,001 --> 00:03:26,722 I hope so. I turned in my coin change with the toll booth. 80 00:03:26,722 --> 00:03:30,760 It wasn't that awful, but by 1980 the disco fad was pretty much over and 81 00:03:30,782 --> 00:03:33,048 people loved to hate on disco music at the time 82 00:03:33,048 --> 00:03:35,740 so you can see why this ended up being such a huge bomb. 83 00:03:35,740 --> 00:03:40,029 Also, shockingly, this movie marks the first film appearance of Caitlyn Jenner 84 00:03:40,029 --> 00:03:42,310 and apparently the experience was so bad 85 00:03:42,310 --> 00:03:45,830 she didn't appear in a movie again until Jack & Jill in 2011. 86 00:03:45,830 --> 00:03:49,868 And, uh, well. 87 00:03:56,398 --> 00:03:58,637 Mommie Dearest is a "biopic" 88 00:03:58,637 --> 00:04:02,538 about the life of actress Joan Crawford's adopted daughter Christina. 89 00:04:02,538 --> 00:04:06,739 Again, I say biopic in air-quotes because the movie was based on 90 00:04:06,739 --> 00:04:08,942 Christina Crawford's controversial memoir 91 00:04:08,942 --> 00:04:12,412 that other members of Joan Crawford's family disavowed when it came out. 92 00:04:12,450 --> 00:04:14,469 I haven't done much research on the topic 93 00:04:14,469 --> 00:04:16,852 so I'm in no position to question this story. 94 00:04:16,852 --> 00:04:18,925 But I will say that after the movie was made 95 00:04:18,925 --> 00:04:23,026 Christina said the film was grotesque and not true to her memoir. 96 00:04:23,026 --> 00:04:26,465 Released just 4 years after Joan Crawford passed away, 97 00:04:26,465 --> 00:04:29,732 this movie basically spits all over her fresh grave 98 00:04:29,732 --> 00:04:31,508 and portrays her as a horrible mother 99 00:04:31,508 --> 00:04:34,889 who frequently, physically and emotionally abused her daughter. 100 00:04:34,889 --> 00:04:38,290 Whether or not this is actually true is still a matter for debate. 101 00:04:38,290 --> 00:04:41,534 Regardless of the real-life circumstances behind the movie, 102 00:04:41,635 --> 00:04:44,867 Faye Dunway's performance of Joan Crawford is iconic now. 103 00:04:44,867 --> 00:04:48,052 People who have experienced emotional abuse from a parent 104 00:04:48,052 --> 00:04:51,185 found her performance scarily true to their own life experiences 105 00:04:51,285 --> 00:04:53,844 but general audiences thought she was just being 106 00:04:53,844 --> 00:04:56,388 outrageously campy and over the top the whole movie. 107 00:04:56,418 --> 00:04:57,663 Because of its reputation 108 00:04:57,663 --> 00:05:00,798 the film accidentally became a queer cult classic over the years 109 00:05:00,798 --> 00:05:02,720 especially in the drag community. 110 00:05:02,786 --> 00:05:05,565 It was even featured in the most recent season of RuPaul's Drag Race. 111 00:05:05,664 --> 00:05:10,098 "No wire hangers!" 112 00:05:10,182 --> 00:05:13,798 ♫ No more wire hangers ♫ ♫ Ah, ah! ♫ 113 00:05:13,881 --> 00:05:18,415 ♫ No, no, wire hangers ♫ ♫ No, no, no, no ♫ 114 00:05:24,317 --> 00:05:27,876 [Evasive] Inchon is a movie about the battle of Incheon in the Korean War. 115 00:05:27,876 --> 00:05:30,492 It was financed and produced by the Unification Church, 116 00:05:30,492 --> 00:05:34,004 a movement that was and still is considered a dangerous cult 117 00:05:34,031 --> 00:05:37,242 with a leader who called himself the second coming of Jesus Christ. 118 00:05:37,242 --> 00:05:40,073 The film's producer was a very wealthy member of the church. 119 00:05:40,073 --> 00:05:42,456 He said he was instructed by God to make the film. 120 00:05:42,556 --> 00:05:45,939 So, unsurprisingly, no investors wanted any part of this. 121 00:05:46,021 --> 00:05:51,088 All 46 million dollars of the budget was provided by the church and its followers. 122 00:05:51,172 --> 00:05:54,668 The film itself doesn't have much to do with the Unification Church. 123 00:05:54,768 --> 00:05:58,739 It's a straightforward war movie that's just boring and unremarkable. 124 00:05:58,839 --> 00:06:03,042 It had some star power but only because the actors in it were paid a lot of money. 125 00:06:03,042 --> 00:06:06,074 Laurence Olivier admitted even before the movie was released 126 00:06:06,124 --> 00:06:08,189 that he was only in it for the money. 127 00:06:08,305 --> 00:06:11,489 It was such a flop that nobody bothered to release it on home media. 128 00:06:11,505 --> 00:06:13,688 The only available version of the movie today 129 00:06:13,772 --> 00:06:17,438 is from an old VHS rip from when it played on Unification Church TV channel. 130 00:06:17,505 --> 00:06:21,040 The only thing worth seeing in this movie is Laurence Olivier's makeup job. 131 00:06:21,040 --> 00:06:22,942 I mean he looks like the Joker. 132 00:06:29,942 --> 00:06:31,441 This movie is just tasteless. 133 00:06:31,441 --> 00:06:33,575 it's based on a novel by Harold Robbins 134 00:06:33,674 --> 00:06:36,626 who was paid 600 000 dollars for the film rights 135 00:06:36,709 --> 00:06:38,559 and apparently fell asleep in the screening room 136 00:06:38,559 --> 00:06:40,459 and never actually watched the movie. 137 00:06:40,575 --> 00:06:42,676 First of all, in the first 15 minutes, 138 00:06:42,775 --> 00:06:45,792 young Ray Liotta, in his first ever movie role, 139 00:06:45,859 --> 00:06:48,943 sexually assaults the main character with a garden hose. 140 00:06:49,043 --> 00:06:52,526 After that the rest of the movie is just her being forced to have sex 141 00:06:52,526 --> 00:06:55,176 with gross older men in order to get ahead in Hollywood. 142 00:06:55,176 --> 00:06:57,092 And you see all of it. 143 00:06:57,092 --> 00:06:59,928 It seems like it was trying to criticize sexism in Hollywood 144 00:06:59,928 --> 00:07:02,245 but instead of handling it with nuance or respect 145 00:07:02,245 --> 00:07:04,309 the movie fully shows the sex scenes 146 00:07:04,392 --> 00:07:06,626 and does the very thing it's trying to critique. 147 00:07:06,626 --> 00:07:10,155 The final scene of the movie shows her winning an Oscar for Best Screenplay 148 00:07:10,155 --> 00:07:12,458 and calling out the men who took advantage of her 149 00:07:12,458 --> 00:07:13,703 in her acceptance speech. 150 00:07:13,703 --> 00:07:17,631 Then she's booed off stage, and leaves, and the movie just ends there. 151 00:07:17,631 --> 00:07:20,013 It's really uncomfortable to watch. 152 00:07:22,378 --> 00:07:24,349 But somehow the next movie is even worse. 153 00:07:30,066 --> 00:07:32,999 Ugh, god, ok. 154 00:07:33,412 --> 00:07:36,238 Bolero is a movie by John Derek. 155 00:07:36,253 --> 00:07:38,964 John Derek is— (groan) 156 00:07:39,591 --> 00:07:41,656 John Derek was an old Hollywood actor 157 00:07:41,656 --> 00:07:45,720 who appeared in supporting roles in several big movies in the 1940s and 50s. 158 00:07:45,720 --> 00:07:48,482 In 1973 when Derek was 47 years old, 159 00:07:48,482 --> 00:07:51,059 he traveled to Europe to direct a low-budget movie called 160 00:07:51,059 --> 00:07:53,734 "Once upon a Love" starring a 16 year old girl named 161 00:07:53,734 --> 00:07:55,604 "Mary Cathleen Collins". 162 00:07:55,604 --> 00:07:58,521 During the production— (retching) 163 00:07:58,672 --> 00:08:00,021 I'm sorry. 164 00:08:00,172 --> 00:08:02,206 During the production, John Derek left his wife 165 00:08:02,272 --> 00:08:05,122 and groomed Mary Collins into a sexual relationship, 166 00:08:05,188 --> 00:08:08,138 With the two staying in Europe until she turned 18 167 00:08:08,188 --> 00:08:10,523 so he could avoid statutory (censor beep) charges. 168 00:08:10,573 --> 00:08:14,972 When they got married a few years later, she changed her name to Bo Derek 169 00:08:15,004 --> 00:08:19,123 and proceeded to star in all of his movies until he died in 1998. 170 00:08:19,123 --> 00:08:22,162 (retching) (vomit squelching) 171 00:08:22,162 --> 00:08:23,063 I'm sorry. 172 00:08:23,106 --> 00:08:26,541 So anyway, Bolero was a movie about a young woman fresh from college 173 00:08:26,591 --> 00:08:29,391 who travels to Morocco in Spain to lose her virginity. 174 00:08:29,457 --> 00:08:31,291 If that wasn't bad enough, 175 00:08:31,358 --> 00:08:35,990 this movie features a full-frontal nudity scene with a 14 year old girl. 176 00:08:36,057 --> 00:08:39,024 Not an actress playing a 14 year old girl. 177 00:08:39,091 --> 00:08:41,774 An actual 14 year old girl. 178 00:08:41,857 --> 00:08:45,925 (retching, vomit squelching) (coughing) 179 00:08:52,752 --> 00:08:54,806 If you've never seen any Rambo movies before 180 00:08:54,871 --> 00:08:57,438 the image you probably associate with the word "Rambo" 181 00:08:57,504 --> 00:09:00,271 is the one where hypermasculine Sylvester Stallone 182 00:09:00,388 --> 00:09:02,472 is firing a machine gun without a shirt on. 183 00:09:02,589 --> 00:09:06,455 But see, that's actually from this movie, "Rambo First Blood: Part II", 184 00:09:06,572 --> 00:09:09,089 which has very little to do with Part 1 at all. 185 00:09:09,189 --> 00:09:11,544 The whole point of the first Rambo movie is that 186 00:09:11,544 --> 00:09:14,505 Rambo was a Vietnam War veteran with severe PTSD 187 00:09:14,572 --> 00:09:18,460 who snaps and kills a bunch of small-time cops who treat him like shit. 188 00:09:18,460 --> 00:09:19,969 This sequel, on the other hand 189 00:09:20,009 --> 00:09:22,793 throws that tragic anti-war character out the window 190 00:09:22,793 --> 00:09:26,008 as the US government sends him back to Vietnam 191 00:09:26,008 --> 00:09:27,544 to locate prisoners of war 192 00:09:27,677 --> 00:09:30,527 and Rambo is weirdly ok with that. 193 00:09:30,610 --> 00:09:32,843 It's like he immediately got over his PTSD 194 00:09:32,843 --> 00:09:35,477 and just got straight to blowing stuff up, no problem. 195 00:09:35,477 --> 00:09:37,725 This movie was a massive box office success 196 00:09:37,725 --> 00:09:39,844 and made double of what the first movie made, 197 00:09:39,844 --> 00:09:42,978 so naturally, Rambo III also ditched the anti-war angle 198 00:09:43,061 --> 00:09:44,861 and sent Rambo to Afghanistan. 199 00:09:44,944 --> 00:09:47,577 I dunno if someone thought the first movie was amazing, 200 00:09:47,660 --> 00:09:50,945 it really sucks to see how quickly they ruined this character. 201 00:09:51,027 --> 00:09:52,527 But, like, I get it. 202 00:09:52,527 --> 00:09:54,961 The people who went to see these sequels in theaters 203 00:09:54,961 --> 00:09:56,460 didn't watch it for the plot. 204 00:09:56,527 --> 00:09:58,861 They watched to see Sylvester Stallone do this. 205 00:09:58,944 --> 00:10:07,250 (bow twang) (explosion) 206 00:10:13,940 --> 00:10:16,656 In the early 80s, Prince was a rising star. 207 00:10:16,656 --> 00:10:18,553 And his stardom was cemented in 1984 208 00:10:18,636 --> 00:10:21,003 with the massive hit that was Purple Rain. 209 00:10:21,003 --> 00:10:22,636 After the success of Purple Rain, 210 00:10:22,636 --> 00:10:26,952 Warner Bros. told Prince he was allowed to do whatever he wanted for his next project 211 00:10:26,952 --> 00:10:30,152 greenlighting Under the Cherry Moon without even reading the script 212 00:10:30,172 --> 00:10:33,554 the story is, Prince plays a guy in the French Rivier named Christopher 213 00:10:33,554 --> 00:10:36,362 He and his friend try to scam a girl out of her inheritance 214 00:10:36,362 --> 00:10:38,558 but they both end up falling in love with her. 215 00:10:38,558 --> 00:10:40,831 A problem became apparent early on 216 00:10:40,831 --> 00:10:43,943 when Prince hired someone with no experience to write the script. 217 00:10:43,943 --> 00:10:46,425 Then 16 days into filming, the director quit. 218 00:10:46,425 --> 00:10:50,364 And Prince took over even though he had no experience directing a movie before. 219 00:10:50,364 --> 00:10:53,706 The end result was a movie that features what I can only describe as 220 00:10:55,106 --> 00:10:55,982 Acting. 221 00:10:56,429 --> 00:10:59,497 Don't try anything funny. Not this time, Christopher. 222 00:10:59,793 --> 00:11:03,390 I want the money or I throw you both out onto the street. 223 00:11:06,296 --> 00:11:07,256 (gasp) 224 00:11:07,256 --> 00:11:09,924 That's right, [inaudible] 225 00:11:13,030 --> 00:11:14,638 Throw me onto the street? 226 00:11:14,638 --> 00:11:17,155 It's bizarre, it's one of those movies where 227 00:11:17,155 --> 00:11:19,685 the acting is so bad it loops around to being funny 228 00:11:19,685 --> 00:11:22,583 which has given it a bit of a cult following over the years 229 00:11:22,583 --> 00:11:24,313 that and the soundtrack is amazing 230 00:11:24,313 --> 00:11:25,487 like with Purple Rain 231 00:11:25,487 --> 00:11:28,210 Prince released an album with the movie that went Platinum 232 00:11:28,210 --> 00:11:31,435 and is today remembered as one of his most iconic albums 233 00:11:31,435 --> 00:11:34,395 After Under the Cherry Moon failed, Prince tried one more time 234 00:11:34,395 --> 00:11:36,079 to direct a feature-length movie 235 00:11:36,079 --> 00:11:38,601 but that one got nominated for a bunch of Razzies too 236 00:11:38,601 --> 00:11:41,557 After that he gave up and never tried to direct a movie again. 237 00:11:41,557 --> 00:11:44,668 Also this here marks the first ever tie in Razzies history 238 00:11:44,668 --> 00:11:46,976 with Under the Cherry Moon tieing with 239 00:11:46,976 --> 00:11:49,155 (laughing) 240 00:11:49,155 --> 00:11:50,384 Howard the Duck. 241 00:12:00,286 --> 00:12:11,076 (Evasive laughing) 242 00:12:11,076 --> 00:12:16,317 Greetings, Evasive viewers, it is I, young Junko, expert in Bird Law 243 00:12:16,317 --> 00:12:19,405 and I'm here to defend my client Howard T. Duck, 244 00:12:19,405 --> 00:12:23,419 star of the Razzies' Worst Film of 1986, Howard The Duck 245 00:12:23,419 --> 00:12:26,716 For nearly the last 40 years my client's reputation has been 246 00:12:26,716 --> 00:12:28,476 tarnished and slandered against 247 00:12:28,476 --> 00:12:32,490 by quack punch, chicken shit critics for this tragic box office bomb. 248 00:12:32,173 --> 00:12:36,790 Central character, the Duck, the one that we're gonna be rooting for, 249 00:12:36,457 --> 00:12:39,486 he's neither funny, or bit of funny." 250 00:12:39,486 --> 00:12:41,142 But I'm here to clear the air. 251 00:12:41,142 --> 00:12:44,982 Howard the Duck is not a movie, no, it's a duckumentary. 252 00:12:45,160 --> 00:12:47,147 I know this because I was there. 253 00:12:47,182 --> 00:12:48,196 We all were. 254 00:12:49,323 --> 00:12:52,988 My entire clan witnessed my client crash land on Earth 255 00:12:52,988 --> 00:12:55,823 to star in a motion picture that of which has been 256 00:12:55,823 --> 00:12:59,303 Um. 257 00:12:59,303 --> 00:13:02,987 it's still awful. It's bad. We're not winning this case, buddy. 258 00:13:03,105 --> 00:13:04,790 I wasn't trying anything. Honest! 259 00:13:04,886 --> 00:13:07,460 This is a strange movie to say the least. 260 00:13:07,151 --> 00:13:09,655 Howard the Duck notoriously opens with 2 instances of 261 00:13:09,655 --> 00:13:12,257 full frontal duck booba in the span of 30 seconds. 262 00:13:14,850 --> 00:13:16,285 But the rest of the movie is this whiplash 263 00:13:16,569 --> 00:13:19,418 between what's a squeaky clean full house type family movie 264 00:13:19,518 --> 00:13:22,510 that no one older than the age of 3 years old would find funny 265 00:13:22,151 --> 00:13:25,680 followed by things like Marty McFly's mom showing off her ass and 266 00:13:25,167 --> 00:13:27,305 pulling off a condom for Howard's corkscrew. 267 00:13:28,277 --> 00:13:29,351 Howard… 268 00:13:29,351 --> 00:13:34,149 It's like anti-matter Shrek where they didn't know how to mix adult humor and a kids' flick properly yet 269 00:13:34,149 --> 00:13:37,214 so it becomes this overly long bland comedy 270 00:13:37,214 --> 00:13:38,991 with hardly any intentional laughs 271 00:13:38,991 --> 00:13:42,329 that just happens to throw in something totally obscene every now and then 272 00:13:42,549 --> 00:13:44,820 - [Howard] Oh! - I just can't resist your 273 00:13:44,820 --> 00:13:46,870 intense animal magnetism. 274 00:13:48,214 --> 00:13:54,139 There's a lot of attempts at duck puns, most are just replacing a random phrase in a word with "duck" 275 00:13:54,230 --> 00:13:57,744 "That's it. No more Mr. Nice Duck." 276 00:13:57,864 --> 00:14:00,883 Even the director's name is Willard Hyuck. 277 00:14:01,516 --> 00:14:02,793 That's a duck name. 278 00:14:03,783 --> 00:14:05,311 That's a name you give a duck. 279 00:14:05,622 --> 00:14:08,607 The first half of the movie has Howard pointlessly meandering 280 00:14:08,678 --> 00:14:12,158 there's no funny interactions or observations or memorable bits 281 00:14:12,158 --> 00:14:15,105 it's just an aimless movie with the guy in the duck suit. 282 00:14:15,184 --> 00:14:17,440 You have an entire portion of the movie 283 00:14:17,440 --> 00:14:19,782 where Howard has a job as a towel boy in a sex club 284 00:14:19,782 --> 00:14:21,742 it's fun for the whole family! 285 00:14:22,323 --> 00:14:24,737 Yeah, Breeders, what the hell. 286 00:14:25,310 --> 00:14:27,945 Bareback bestiality and pedophilia. 287 00:14:28,154 --> 00:14:32,180 Oh yeah, we find Howard getting a [?] as a result of a [?] incident. 288 00:14:32,258 --> 00:14:40,345 Which also leads to Palpatine somehow returning from the dead and possessing the body of that one actor that's in every 80s movie who'd later be arrested for being a sex pervert. 289 00:14:41,199 --> 00:14:42,859 What would you like to eat? 290 00:14:42,915 --> 00:14:45,815 I no longer need human food. 291 00:14:45,815 --> 00:14:47,964 [Junko] I need little boy butts. 292 00:14:47,964 --> 00:14:50,702 You have a movie where a talking duck fires a giant laser 293 00:14:50,702 --> 00:14:53,142 at a hell portal to stop a horde of alien warlords 294 00:14:53,142 --> 00:14:54,388 from taking over the Earth 295 00:14:54,388 --> 00:14:56,914 and they still manage to make it a total snooze fest 296 00:14:56,914 --> 00:14:58,821 They try to give Howard a bit of edge 297 00:14:58,821 --> 00:15:01,721 but he still feels too kiddy and sanitized 298 00:15:01,721 --> 00:15:03,494 And part of that is his design. 299 00:15:03,494 --> 00:15:05,882 He looks like a cross of a Furby and MacCulkin. 300 00:15:05,882 --> 00:15:07,582 There are some things I did like, 301 00:15:07,582 --> 00:15:09,202 these alien overlords are cool 302 00:15:09,202 --> 00:15:11,630 their design and stop motion is really well done. 303 00:15:11,630 --> 00:15:14,000 The sequence where Howard gets shot into space 304 00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:16,210 is pretty neat, pretty impressive to look at. 305 00:15:16,210 --> 00:15:19,820 I like this sequence where Howard and [?] get a [?] 306 00:15:19,820 --> 00:15:21,540 and start flying away from the cops 307 00:15:21,540 --> 00:15:22,300 that was good. 308 00:15:22,300 --> 00:15:23,730 Yeah, Tim Robins is in this 309 00:15:23,730 --> 00:15:26,931 Imagine having what's considered one of the best movies of all time 310 00:15:26,931 --> 00:15:28,165 as part of your portfolio 311 00:15:28,165 --> 00:15:30,783 and on the other end of the spectrum, Howard the Duck, 312 00:15:30,783 --> 00:15:31,773 now that's range 313 00:15:31,773 --> 00:15:35,150 Genuinely I was taken aback because some of the shots in this movie 314 00:15:35,150 --> 00:15:36,805 undeniably go hard. 315 00:15:36,805 --> 00:15:40,585 There's a version of this movie that could've actually been good with less work 316 00:15:40,585 --> 00:15:44,397 If they leaned into Howard being this cynical, perverted wise-cracking duck 317 00:15:44,397 --> 00:15:46,817 that's down on his luck, who gets thrust into Earth 318 00:15:46,817 --> 00:15:48,482 and finds this strange new realm 319 00:15:48,482 --> 00:15:50,277 isn't so much different from his own. 320 00:15:50,277 --> 00:15:52,917 Then it's all about the bills, baby, put it on my belt 321 00:15:52,917 --> 00:15:55,677 He could take it as an opportunity for a fresh start, 322 00:15:55,677 --> 00:15:57,442 slowly climbing the corporate ladder 323 00:15:57,442 --> 00:15:59,135 until becoming a national celebrity 324 00:15:59,135 --> 00:16:01,443 that gets caught up in 80s consumerism and greed 325 00:16:01,443 --> 00:16:04,709 then have him begrudgingly involved in weird sci-fi fantasy stuff 326 00:16:04,709 --> 00:16:05,913 like the comics, I dunno. 327 00:16:05,913 --> 00:16:08,002 I'm not sure how to defend my client. 328 00:16:08,002 --> 00:16:08,923 Give him the chair. 329 00:16:09,582 --> 00:16:10,902 (Howard screams) 330 00:16:19,038 --> 00:16:28,708 (Evasive laughing) 331 00:16:29,239 --> 00:16:32,441 Alright, I may not have been able to defend Howard, 332 00:16:32,441 --> 00:16:36,502 but know this: from this day forth, I will ensure every client of mine 333 00:16:36,502 --> 00:16:37,919 is proven innocent. 334 00:16:38,328 --> 00:16:41,978 Now for my next client, I will be defending one Bill Cos-. 335 00:16:41,978 --> 00:16:42,968 Bill Co-Bill Cosby. 336 00:16:46,402 --> 00:16:47,612 Bill Co-Bill Cosby. 337 00:16:47,875 --> 00:16:50,785 I'm good. Your Honor? I would draw. 338 00:16:50,975 --> 00:16:53,915 We're done here. We're done. 339 00:16:53,915 --> 00:16:57,316 It's Leonard, part 6. 340 00:16:57,316 --> 00:16:59,652 Ask anyone who's seen this movie, they'll tell you 341 00:16:59,652 --> 00:17:02,708 that's when they first knew lil' Bill was a real piece of shit 342 00:17:02,708 --> 00:17:06,353 When I heard there was a comedy movie that just started on part 6 343 00:17:06,353 --> 00:17:10,813 That's funny, maybe this movie could be bad in a good way, at the very least 344 00:17:10,813 --> 00:17:14,813 Nope, it's just bad, it's boring, it's so boring. 345 00:17:14,853 --> 00:17:17,223 If there's one thing Cosby was always a master at 346 00:17:17,223 --> 00:17:18,837 it's making people very sleepy. 347 00:17:19,087 --> 00:17:22,151 The whole thing is supposed to be a spoof on the spy genre, 348 00:17:22,151 --> 00:17:25,356 like Naked Gun, except it actually came out a year before that movie 349 00:17:25,531 --> 00:17:29,284 They just had the cameras rolling and had Bill Cosby do whatever he wanted 350 00:17:29,284 --> 00:17:31,514 There's a bunch of weird sex shit 351 00:17:31,514 --> 00:17:33,018 I mean the clues are all there, 352 00:17:33,018 --> 00:17:36,309 in the movie his wife divorced him because he slept with a 19 year old 353 00:17:36,309 --> 00:17:40,309 and his daughter is dating an older man to further her career as an actress 354 00:17:40,309 --> 00:17:42,836 Leonard has to see her flash her tits on stage 355 00:17:42,836 --> 00:17:46,127 for no reason, none of these scenes add anything to the movie 356 00:17:46,127 --> 00:17:48,539 Cosby just wanted to look at some young girl tits 357 00:17:48,539 --> 00:17:51,883 The whole film has this weird lethargic and slow energy to it 358 00:17:51,883 --> 00:17:54,124 Everything from the dialogue to the editing, 359 00:17:54,124 --> 00:17:56,541 it's like watching a movie at 0.5 speed. 360 00:17:56,541 --> 00:17:58,635 The movie opens with Leonard and an assassin 361 00:17:58,635 --> 00:18:00,309 having a shootout in a kitchen 362 00:18:00,309 --> 00:18:03,604 The joke is that what they're doing is actually helping the food prep 363 00:18:03,604 --> 00:18:07,882 Ok, could be funny but the pace of it all is so bizarrely off by a step 364 00:18:07,882 --> 00:18:11,275 Every gag and bit is like this, like they took something that was 365 00:18:11,275 --> 00:18:14,552 maybe a 3 out of 10 joke at best and spread it so thin that 366 00:18:14,908 --> 00:18:15,975 you ask yourself, 367 00:18:15,975 --> 00:18:18,036 Was there even a joke at all to begin with? 368 00:18:18,197 --> 00:18:20,633 The plot follows Leonard being the best agent 369 00:18:20,633 --> 00:18:23,567 who's long retired, then pulled back for one last mission 370 00:18:23,567 --> 00:18:26,417 after a buncha animals under mind control kill people 371 00:18:26,417 --> 00:18:28,417 Again a god-awful 80s comedy starts 372 00:18:28,417 --> 00:18:30,417 with an animal looking at a porno mag. 373 00:18:30,417 --> 00:18:31,877 Here's two fucking nickels. 374 00:18:31,877 --> 00:18:34,392 The first half is him just stumbling around 375 00:18:34,392 --> 00:18:36,157 trying to get back with his ex wife 376 00:18:36,242 --> 00:18:39,224 who pours soup on him— what is this gag? 377 00:18:39,224 --> 00:18:42,363 Is this a fetish, Mr. Cosby? You think this was genuinely funny? 378 00:18:42,363 --> 00:18:46,363 [mocking] We'll have him pour soup. 379 00:18:46,560 --> 00:18:49,593 Cosby doesn't have a single funny line or hook to his character 380 00:18:49,593 --> 00:18:52,144 you can tell he's put zero effort into any of this 381 00:18:52,224 --> 00:18:56,713 It's like he said "Yeah I'll do the movie but I don't wanna look too stupid, 382 00:18:56,780 --> 00:19:00,732 These so-called jokes are what the most boring uptight person in the world 383 00:19:00,732 --> 00:19:02,355 would think being silly is. 384 00:19:02,355 --> 00:19:05,816 [mocking] Oh, look, wow he's being a ballerina, so girly. 385 00:19:05,816 --> 00:19:10,310 Oh, wow, he's doing a silly fitness tape, how can he subject himself to that. 386 00:19:10,310 --> 00:19:14,493 Oh, wee, it's like he thinks these things are so beneath him 387 00:19:14,493 --> 00:19:16,415 that just him doing it would be funny. 388 00:19:16,415 --> 00:19:17,920 What a piece of shit. 389 00:19:17,920 --> 00:19:19,705 What really makes me mad, though? 390 00:19:19,705 --> 00:19:23,473 It's completely unfair. Because everyone seems to be trying, but him. 391 00:19:23,473 --> 00:19:26,793 In the end when Leonard tries to free all the animals from captivity, 392 00:19:26,793 --> 00:19:29,090 and I just wanna recognize this bird right here. 393 00:19:29,090 --> 00:19:33,020 Who in this 5 second shot, bends the bars of his cage with his beak and breaks free 394 00:19:33,214 --> 00:19:34,274 God bless this bird. 395 00:19:34,274 --> 00:19:37,404 This bird put more effort than Bill Cosby in his own movie. 396 00:19:37,634 --> 00:19:41,124 This bird did not deserve to be in one of the worst movies of all time. 397 00:19:41,124 --> 00:19:42,435 None of these animals did. 398 00:19:42,435 --> 00:19:44,735 This ostrich didn't deserve to be betrayed 399 00:19:44,735 --> 00:19:48,278 with a sex criminal grinding his pudding pop on its back. 400 00:19:48,278 --> 00:19:53,245 If audiences in 1987 hated this, watching it now, 401 00:19:53,245 --> 00:19:56,725 with all the humor naturally diluted even further to the passage of time 402 00:19:56,725 --> 00:19:58,865 is like drinking a 40 year old can of new coke 403 00:19:58,865 --> 00:20:02,155 and when Bill's handing you a drink, you probably shouldn't drink it. 404 00:20:02,375 --> 00:20:04,477 (gurgling) 405 00:20:10,889 --> 00:20:14,786 Cocktail is a movie where young Tom Cruise plays a bartender in Manhattan. 406 00:20:15,136 --> 00:20:17,639 He movies to Jamaica and falls in love with a girl. 407 00:20:17,639 --> 00:20:20,449 Then he loses her and moves back to New York to win her back 408 00:20:20,449 --> 00:20:21,599 That's pretty much it. 409 00:20:21,599 --> 00:20:23,719 What you see is what you get with this one. 410 00:20:23,719 --> 00:20:25,109 It's a really mediocre movie. 411 00:20:25,109 --> 00:20:27,232 Not that good, but not that bad either. 412 00:20:27,232 --> 00:20:29,699 Well except for when Tom Cruise stands on a bar 413 00:20:29,699 --> 00:20:31,142 and reads his shitty poetry. 414 00:20:31,142 --> 00:20:32,312 This is pretty cringey. 415 00:20:32,312 --> 00:20:34,821 I see America drinking 416 00:20:34,821 --> 00:20:37,554 the fabulous cocktails I make. 417 00:20:38,743 --> 00:20:42,163 America's getting stinking on something I stir or shake. 418 00:20:42,163 --> 00:20:44,463 (laughing) 419 00:20:44,463 --> 00:20:47,273 I make drinks so sweet and snazz-ay, 420 00:20:47,273 --> 00:20:49,817 iced tea the kamikaze, 421 00:20:49,817 --> 00:20:52,067 (hollering) 422 00:20:52,067 --> 00:20:57,037 the sex on the beach is Schnapps made from peach 423 00:20:57,037 --> 00:21:00,497 the ball and hammer the Alabama slammer! 424 00:21:00,497 --> 00:21:04,340 Unsurprisingly with Tom Cruise starring, this movie was a massive success, 425 00:21:04,340 --> 00:21:09,237 earning a ridiculous 171 million dollars on a 20 million dollar budget. 426 00:21:09,237 --> 00:21:12,661 It's also the movie the Beach Boys "Kokomo" song was written for. 427 00:21:13,188 --> 00:21:15,328 Besides that, not much to talk about here. 428 00:21:15,328 --> 00:21:18,534 I'm pretty sure it only won Worst Picture because this was the year 429 00:21:18,534 --> 00:21:20,519 Rain Man was favored to win Best Picture. 430 00:21:20,519 --> 00:21:24,485 The voters must have thought it was funny to make the Best and Worst Picture 431 00:21:24,485 --> 00:21:25,713 be Tom Cruise movies. 432 00:21:32,549 --> 00:21:36,676 Ok before making this video, I hadn't watched any Star Trek at all. 433 00:21:36,676 --> 00:21:40,933 But because I'm committed to my craft, I went and watched all 6 original movies 434 00:21:40,933 --> 00:21:43,895 just so I could understand why this one is considered the worst. 435 00:21:43,895 --> 00:21:45,353 After all that, I— 436 00:21:46,107 --> 00:21:47,840 Yeah. I get it now. 437 00:21:47,840 --> 00:21:51,566 It's not a horrible movie but especially compared to the previous films, 438 00:21:51,566 --> 00:21:53,604 Star Trek V is pretty bleh. 439 00:21:53,604 --> 00:21:56,029 Pretty much everything went wrong behind the scenes. 440 00:21:56,029 --> 00:21:59,240 William Shatner directed it with no prior experience. 441 00:21:59,240 --> 00:22:01,973 Nobody could agree on anything during the writing process, 442 00:22:01,973 --> 00:22:03,370 There was a writers' strike. 443 00:22:03,370 --> 00:22:04,657 Then a Teamsters strike. 444 00:22:04,657 --> 00:22:06,993 They shot a lot of the movie in the Mojave Desert, 445 00:22:06,993 --> 00:22:08,670 which is as miserable as it sounds. 446 00:22:08,670 --> 00:22:12,670 After the filming was done, they only had 3 months to make the special effects, 447 00:22:12,670 --> 00:22:16,120 and all the best effects technicians in Hollywood were busy working on 448 00:22:16,120 --> 00:22:18,594 Indiana Jones 3 and Ghostbusters II at the time. 449 00:22:18,594 --> 00:22:21,539 Do I think this movie deserved Worst Picture? No. 450 00:22:21,539 --> 00:22:24,633 It does some wacky things like introduce Spock's long-lost brother 451 00:22:24,633 --> 00:22:26,091 that he never mentioned before 452 00:22:26,091 --> 00:22:28,487 Or show Kirk getting mauled by a cat woman. 453 00:22:28,700 --> 00:22:31,146 Overall I really don't think it's that bad 454 00:22:31,146 --> 00:22:33,572 Though I'm not a Trekkie who had to see 455 00:22:33,572 --> 00:22:36,834 Captain Kirk show up on the Enterprise in a "Go climb a rock t-shirt" 456 00:22:36,834 --> 00:22:37,904 So… 457 00:22:39,814 --> 00:22:41,814 I mean…is that bad? 458 00:22:42,628 --> 00:22:43,910 I actually don't know. 459 00:22:44,662 --> 00:22:49,041 Can someone in the comments tell me if that's bad, if that's out of character? 460 00:22:49,821 --> 00:22:51,561 Should I be mad at this or not? 461 00:22:58,561 --> 00:23:00,791 The Adventures of Ford Fairlane was a 462 00:23:00,791 --> 00:23:02,889 "comedy" starring Andrew Dice Clay. 463 00:23:02,889 --> 00:23:05,035 If you don't know who Andrew Dice Clay is, 464 00:23:05,035 --> 00:23:08,020 he was a comedian most active in the late 80s and early 90s 465 00:23:08,020 --> 00:23:10,310 who was known as the Dice Man, 466 00:23:10,310 --> 00:23:14,584 which was basically a cover to tell the most offensive jokes possible. 467 00:23:14,711 --> 00:23:16,195 And they're always on parade. 468 00:23:16,655 --> 00:23:19,425 They march down the street with t-shirts and flags 469 00:23:19,425 --> 00:23:21,695 'I want money for AIDS disease.' Beautiful. 470 00:23:21,819 --> 00:23:25,213 I want money for a fucking car, I ain't marching up and down the street 471 00:23:25,284 --> 00:23:26,464 Get a job, butt slammer. 472 00:23:26,506 --> 00:23:29,585 [Evasive] The movie itself is about a detective, I guess, 473 00:23:29,585 --> 00:23:31,385 I dunno, it's just not funny at all. 474 00:23:31,385 --> 00:23:34,779 I was on my phone the whole time because I was just so bored. 475 00:23:34,779 --> 00:23:36,623 - I got something serious to discuss. 476 00:23:37,703 --> 00:23:41,392 Yeah, what is it, premature ejaculation? (laughing) 477 00:23:41,392 --> 00:23:43,846 We were at our parents' wedding anniversary, 478 00:23:43,846 --> 00:23:44,976 and I told that joke, 479 00:23:45,156 --> 00:23:47,076 'What's the definition of vagina? 480 00:23:47,297 --> 00:23:50,507 The box that peanuts comes in!' (laugh) 481 00:23:50,547 --> 00:23:53,313 Gilbert Godfrey plays the only funny character in the movie 482 00:23:53,313 --> 00:23:56,743 but he dies like 25 minutes in and the rest is just a boring mess 483 00:23:56,743 --> 00:23:58,362 that's impossible to follow. 484 00:23:58,362 --> 00:24:01,817 The director Renny Harlin was also working on Die Hard 2 at the time 485 00:24:01,817 --> 00:24:05,657 which came out in theaters at the same time as Ford Fairlane 486 00:24:05,657 --> 00:24:08,562 and when you compare the money between the two movies. 487 00:24:08,562 --> 00:24:11,132 Yeah, it's obvious which movie he cared about more. 488 00:24:11,132 --> 00:24:13,422 Clint Eastwood. 489 00:24:13,422 --> 00:24:15,812 I fucked him. Oh! 490 00:24:22,390 --> 00:24:24,355 [Evasive] 1990 was another tie 491 00:24:24,355 --> 00:24:26,805 with Ford Fairlane tieing with another movie 492 00:24:26,805 --> 00:24:29,141 from unapologetic (censor beep)-phile John Derek. 493 00:24:29,141 --> 00:24:33,063 In this one, Bo Derek plays a woman married to a much older man 494 00:24:33,063 --> 00:24:36,751 and when the older man dies, his ghost takes up residence in her head 495 00:24:36,751 --> 00:24:38,571 and goads her into murdering a man 496 00:24:38,571 --> 00:24:41,343 so he can possess his body and have sex with her again. 497 00:24:41,343 --> 00:24:43,863 It's a supernatural dirty old man movie 498 00:24:43,863 --> 00:24:45,550 where John Derek fantasizes about 499 00:24:45,550 --> 00:24:48,468 living rent-free in Bo Derek's head after he dies. 500 00:24:48,468 --> 00:24:50,640 Plus this ended up being his last movie. 501 00:24:50,806 --> 00:24:53,209 It would be poetic if it wasn't so disgusting. 502 00:24:53,209 --> 00:24:59,753 Bo was very very young. Linda was very young… 503 00:24:59,753 --> 00:25:01,714 I guess I just meet them young, 504 00:25:01,714 --> 00:25:04,138 before they're wise enough to know I'm not the guy. 505 00:25:04,138 --> 00:25:06,888 Anyway the acting is bad, the story is bad, 506 00:25:06,888 --> 00:25:08,157 the visuals are bad, 507 00:25:08,157 --> 00:25:10,597 but the real cherry on top is: this movie 508 00:25:10,597 --> 00:25:13,161 was the first film appearance of Donald Trump. 509 00:25:13,161 --> 00:25:17,102 No joke, Trump's first movie was made by a (censor beep) phile. 510 00:25:17,228 --> 00:25:19,623 He even does a little duck face in it, look at him. 511 00:25:22,487 --> 00:25:23,277 Poetic. 512 00:25:29,481 --> 00:25:30,556 Just watch this clip. 513 00:25:30,556 --> 00:25:31,872 Woah! 514 00:25:32,860 --> 00:25:34,515 Happy [inaudible] 515 00:25:35,375 --> 00:25:40,125 Oh no! How am I driving? 1800-I'm gonna-(censor beep)-die!" 516 00:25:40,125 --> 00:25:43,215 [Evasive] Bruce Willis plays a master burglar fresh out of prison 517 00:25:43,215 --> 00:25:45,325 who was blackmailed into stealing some art 518 00:25:45,325 --> 00:25:48,124 but it's all part of a conspiracy to build a secret machine 519 00:25:48,124 --> 00:25:50,917 invented by Leonardo Da Vinci that can turn lead into gold. 520 00:25:50,917 --> 00:25:54,698 At this point in his career, Bruce Willis was mainly known for Die Hard 1 and 2, 521 00:25:54,698 --> 00:25:56,956 and was looking to branch out with Hudson Hawk. 522 00:25:56,956 --> 00:25:59,509 Apparently he couldn't decide what he wanted it to be. 523 00:25:59,509 --> 00:26:01,697 In an interview, one of the writers later said: 524 00:26:01,697 --> 00:26:03,240 I knew we were in trouble 525 00:26:03,240 --> 00:26:05,275 when Joel and Bruce would say during filming 526 00:26:05,275 --> 00:26:08,071 You know what this is? This is a Pink Panther movie. 527 00:26:08,071 --> 00:26:09,343 The next day they'd say 528 00:26:09,343 --> 00:26:12,452 You know what this is? This is an American James Bond movie. 529 00:26:12,452 --> 00:26:16,080 Then it would be: This is North by Northwest. 530 00:26:16,080 --> 00:26:17,609 I even remember someone saying: 531 00:26:17,609 --> 00:26:20,129 You know what this is? This is Casino Royale. 532 00:26:20,129 --> 00:26:23,864 Eventually I realized, if every day they were saying it was something different 533 00:26:23,864 --> 00:26:26,730 once we got to the editing room, we were gonna be in trouble. 534 00:26:26,730 --> 00:26:29,035 So yeah, the final product is all over the place. 535 00:26:29,035 --> 00:26:31,973 But he movie developed a bit of a cult following 536 00:26:31,973 --> 00:26:34,944 just because it's so…so silly 537 00:26:34,944 --> 00:26:36,664 (screaming) 538 00:26:36,664 --> 00:26:38,754 - Honey? - (screaming) 539 00:26:39,396 --> 00:26:40,395 Ball ball? 540 00:26:40,395 --> 00:26:41,286 Woof! 541 00:26:42,652 --> 00:26:45,442 (dog screaming) 542 00:26:52,648 --> 00:26:54,910 Here's another movie that's really not that bad. 543 00:26:54,910 --> 00:26:58,746 It's a World War II spy movie where Melanie Griffith is a half Jewish woman 544 00:26:58,746 --> 00:27:02,504 with no spy experience who signs herself up to be a spy in Berlin 545 00:27:02,504 --> 00:27:06,385 because she wants to prove herself and save her Jewish cousins who are in hiding. 546 00:27:06,385 --> 00:27:08,466 Michael Douglas plays another spy 547 00:27:08,466 --> 00:27:12,097 and pre-Schindler's List Liam Neeson plays a Nazi officer. 548 00:27:12,097 --> 00:27:14,190 Most complaints about the movie were aimed at 549 00:27:14,190 --> 00:27:16,766 how unbelievable Melanie Griffith is as a spy 550 00:27:16,766 --> 00:27:18,866 because she was really bad at her job. 551 00:27:18,866 --> 00:27:22,543 Like "spilling soup on Liam Neeson and taking the German kids she's nannying 552 00:27:22,543 --> 00:27:25,663 to the building her cousins are hiding in" kind of bad 553 00:27:25,663 --> 00:27:28,106 But overall it's not that awful of a movie 554 00:27:28,106 --> 00:27:30,156 because the plot holes and writing problems 555 00:27:30,156 --> 00:27:33,492 are balanced out by a good soundtrack and good cinematography 556 00:27:33,492 --> 00:27:34,656 It's just average. 557 00:27:34,656 --> 00:27:36,096 Not bad enough to be memorable 558 00:27:36,096 --> 00:27:38,503 but not good enough that you'd ever watch it again. 559 00:27:38,503 --> 00:27:40,803 The cinematic equivalent of eating at Denny's. 560 00:27:40,803 --> 00:27:44,437 I think 1992 was just a slow year for bad movies in general. 561 00:27:44,437 --> 00:27:47,755 That same year they also nominated Newsies for Worst Picture 562 00:27:47,755 --> 00:27:51,188 and Danny DeVito for Worst Supporting Actor 563 00:27:51,188 --> 00:27:54,626 like…what? Why? How? 564 00:27:56,146 --> 00:27:56,846 What? 565 00:28:04,068 --> 00:28:06,354 Once again, this is a movie that's not that bad. 566 00:28:06,354 --> 00:28:08,702 It's a drama where Woody Harrelson and Demi Moore 567 00:28:08,702 --> 00:28:11,408 play a financially struggling married couple in Vegas 568 00:28:11,408 --> 00:28:13,576 and Robert Redford is a filthy rich guy 569 00:28:13,576 --> 00:28:15,618 who offers the couple 1 million dollars 570 00:28:15,618 --> 00:28:17,636 for a 1 night stand with Demi Moore. 571 00:28:17,636 --> 00:28:19,370 Honestly, it's fine. 572 00:28:19,370 --> 00:28:23,403 It takes itself very seriously and it's vaguely misogynistic at points. 573 00:28:23,403 --> 00:28:27,294 Also it's completely unbelievable that a man who looks like Robert Redford 574 00:28:27,294 --> 00:28:30,733 would pay a million dollars to sleep with someone. 575 00:28:30,733 --> 00:28:32,803 But in the context of the movie it works. 576 00:28:32,803 --> 00:28:35,597 Definitely not the worst movie of the year. 577 00:28:35,597 --> 00:28:37,517 You're telling me that Indecent Proposal 578 00:28:37,517 --> 00:28:40,817 won Worst Picture but Mr. Nanny wasn't even nominated? 579 00:28:40,817 --> 00:28:43,187 Razzie voters were asleep at the wheel this year. 580 00:28:52,653 --> 00:28:56,371 In this one Bruce Willis plays a psychologist who can't see the color red 581 00:28:56,371 --> 00:28:58,849 who gets wrapped up in a murder after his colleague 582 00:28:58,849 --> 00:29:00,543 gets killed Assassin's Creed-style 583 00:29:00,543 --> 00:29:02,676 and he suspects someone in his therapy group. 584 00:29:02,722 --> 00:29:06,006 I'm so confused why this was even nominated for Worst Picture 585 00:29:06,006 --> 00:29:08,006 because this wasn't a bad movie at all. 586 00:29:08,175 --> 00:29:11,592 It's surreal and weird, sure, but it's in a Twin Peaks style of way 587 00:29:11,592 --> 00:29:13,966 where it's still unsettling and fun to watch. 588 00:29:13,966 --> 00:29:16,680 Definitely a 6.5 out of 10 movie for me. 589 00:29:17,992 --> 00:29:19,418 Maybe a 7 out of 10 I dunno. 590 00:29:19,418 --> 00:29:22,560 Another one that became a cult hit after home video release. 591 00:29:22,560 --> 00:29:26,196 Partly because of this crazy sex scene in a pool that everybody wanted to see 592 00:29:26,196 --> 00:29:28,846 It was even streaming on Criterion Channel at one point 593 00:29:28,846 --> 00:29:31,115 which basically means that it's certified art. 594 00:29:31,115 --> 00:29:32,325 That's all I have to say. 595 00:29:32,325 --> 00:29:36,057 I dunno guys, some of these 90s movies aren't bad enough to complain about. 596 00:29:42,674 --> 00:29:45,164 There's a lot to be said about Showgirls. 597 00:29:45,164 --> 00:29:47,323 First of all, Director Paul Verhoeven 598 00:29:47,323 --> 00:29:50,089 was the first to accept his Razzie award in person. 599 00:29:50,089 --> 00:29:51,753 And that's kind of funny. 600 00:29:51,802 --> 00:29:55,479 And I'm very happy because it was much more fun 601 00:29:55,479 --> 00:29:58,188 than reading the reviews in September. Thank you so much. 602 00:29:58,188 --> 00:30:01,722 (clapping, cheering) 603 00:30:01,722 --> 00:30:03,851 Second of all, Showgirls isn't bad. 604 00:30:03,851 --> 00:30:07,228 It's actually a great movie, in my opinion, and a lot of people agree. 605 00:30:07,228 --> 00:30:11,043 It is a wild movie about the world of high budget Las Vegas strip shows 606 00:30:11,043 --> 00:30:12,945 Obviously with subject matter like that 607 00:30:12,945 --> 00:30:14,906 you're going to view it very differently 608 00:30:14,906 --> 00:30:16,860 depending on your gender and sexuality. 609 00:30:16,860 --> 00:30:19,040 But regardless of what kind of person you are 610 00:30:19,040 --> 00:30:22,224 the experience of watching this movie is an absolute rollercoaster. 611 00:30:22,224 --> 00:30:24,013 One. Two. Three. 612 00:30:24,013 --> 00:30:28,053 Thrust it. Thrust it. Thrust it! 613 00:30:28,053 --> 00:30:29,494 Come on, thrust it. 614 00:30:29,494 --> 00:30:33,128 But for as over the top as this movie is it's also pretty true to life. 615 00:30:33,128 --> 00:30:36,009 During his research, writer Joe Eszterhas interviewed 616 00:30:36,009 --> 00:30:38,299 over two hundred strippers in Las Vegas 617 00:30:38,299 --> 00:30:41,216 and the result was a shockingly straightforward depiction 618 00:30:41,216 --> 00:30:44,182 of the lives of high profile sex workers and performers 619 00:30:44,182 --> 00:30:47,013 And a biting satire against show business in general. 620 00:30:47,243 --> 00:30:48,571 Take a look at these tits. 621 00:30:48,729 --> 00:30:50,476 What are these, watermelons? 622 00:30:50,504 --> 00:30:52,502 This is a stage, babes, it's not a patch. 623 00:30:52,902 --> 00:30:53,662 See ya. 624 00:30:53,696 --> 00:30:55,724 Your ears are sticking out. They are. 625 00:30:56,069 --> 00:30:58,097 Come back and see me when you get em fixed. 626 00:30:58,524 --> 00:30:59,264 See ya. 627 00:31:01,206 --> 00:31:03,329 Can you spell MGM backwards? I bet you can't. 628 00:31:03,412 --> 00:31:05,222 - MGM. - I'm impressed. 629 00:31:05,613 --> 00:31:08,053 Come back when you fuck some of those baby fat off. 630 00:31:08,053 --> 00:31:11,960 Now in today's era of gritty HBO dramas, none of this is that shocking 631 00:31:11,960 --> 00:31:14,839 but in 1995 this was next level stuff. 632 00:31:14,839 --> 00:31:18,155 Plus with the subject matter, this movie has a lot of nudity. 633 00:31:18,155 --> 00:31:20,534 It was rated NC-17 in America 634 00:31:20,534 --> 00:31:25,225 and to date it is the only NC-17 movie ever given a wide release in theaters. 635 00:31:25,225 --> 00:31:27,706 It was so explicit and controversial 636 00:31:27,706 --> 00:31:31,187 that MGM had to hire security at every movie theater in America 637 00:31:31,187 --> 00:31:34,567 just to make sure nobody under the age of 18 snuck into the theater. 638 00:31:34,567 --> 00:31:36,748 The movie lost millions of dollars 639 00:31:36,748 --> 00:31:39,387 and to this day, no studio has ever dared 640 00:31:39,387 --> 00:31:42,320 to try and release an NC-17 movie in theaters again. 641 00:31:42,320 --> 00:31:46,201 If this sounds interesting to you, I recommend giving this movie a watch 642 00:31:46,201 --> 00:31:49,513 because I can't really do it justice with just words alone. 643 00:31:49,513 --> 00:31:51,398 Just know what you're getting into 644 00:31:51,398 --> 00:31:54,507 because this movie is every bit as traumatic as it is glamorous 645 00:31:54,507 --> 00:31:58,211 And actually to prove to you how much I like this movie, watch this. 646 00:31:59,315 --> 00:32:00,155 Oh. 647 00:32:00,691 --> 00:32:01,634 Oh. 648 00:32:03,684 --> 00:32:05,238 I'm a showgirl. 649 00:32:05,931 --> 00:32:07,918 I'm a showgirl, baby. 650 00:32:08,466 --> 00:32:09,833 I'm a showgirl. 651 00:32:16,472 --> 00:32:17,218 In the mid-90s 652 00:32:17,218 --> 00:32:19,985 Demi Moore was one of the biggest film stars in the world. 653 00:32:20,243 --> 00:32:22,243 And the world was dying to know, 654 00:32:22,243 --> 00:32:24,243 what do Demi Moore's boobs look like? 655 00:32:24,567 --> 00:32:26,908 That's actually the only reason this movie exists. 656 00:32:26,908 --> 00:32:29,761 They paid Demi Moore 12.5 million dollars 657 00:32:29,761 --> 00:32:33,171 the most any woman had ever been paid for a movie role at the time 658 00:32:33,171 --> 00:32:36,514 just so she would star in this movie and show her boobs to the camera. 659 00:32:37,884 --> 00:32:40,801 This movie is like if Showgirls was actually bad. 660 00:32:40,801 --> 00:32:44,868 Demi Moore plays an FBI agent who loses her daughter in a custody battle 661 00:32:44,868 --> 00:32:47,783 and then becomes a stripper in Florida at a place called Eager Beaver 662 00:32:47,783 --> 00:32:49,516 to pay for a court appeal. 663 00:32:49,516 --> 00:32:51,925 She basically girlbosses being a stripper. 664 00:32:51,925 --> 00:32:54,187 Not in a nuanced way like Showgirls though. 665 00:32:54,187 --> 00:32:57,189 But in a stupid way that takes itself seriously 666 00:32:57,189 --> 00:32:59,781 and is mostly boring and not believable at all. 667 00:32:59,781 --> 00:33:02,797 Despite bad reviews, the movie ended up being a huge success 668 00:33:02,797 --> 00:33:05,349 The director-writer-producer Andrew Bergman 669 00:33:05,349 --> 00:33:07,595 basically quit Hollywood after this movie 670 00:33:07,595 --> 00:33:09,163 I'm pretty sure what happened is 671 00:33:09,163 --> 00:33:11,402 once he got Demi Moore to agree to go topless, 672 00:33:11,402 --> 00:33:13,572 he just phoned in the rest of the movie 673 00:33:13,572 --> 00:33:16,821 because clearly the audiences weren't watching for the plot. 674 00:33:16,821 --> 00:33:17,871 But what can I say? 675 00:33:18,450 --> 00:33:19,880 That's showbiz, baby. 676 00:33:20,374 --> 00:33:24,675 That's…that's showbiz, baby. 677 00:33:31,138 --> 00:33:34,982 The Postman takes place in a distant future year of 2013 678 00:33:35,161 --> 00:33:37,756 after much of humanity has been wiped out by a plague. 679 00:33:37,756 --> 00:33:40,320 Kevin Costner, who also directed the movie, 680 00:33:40,434 --> 00:33:44,691 stars as a traveling Shakespeare performer that's conscripted to Caesar's Legion 681 00:33:44,691 --> 00:33:47,058 He escapes and finds an old mail bag full of mail 682 00:33:47,058 --> 00:33:49,317 and pretends to be a mailman so he can get food 683 00:33:49,317 --> 00:33:52,310 and accidentally restarts the US postal service in the process 684 00:33:52,440 --> 00:33:54,525 Also it's almost 3 hours long. 685 00:33:54,525 --> 00:33:59,055 Honestly, as far as post-apocalyptic adventures go, this one isn't that bad. 686 00:33:59,055 --> 00:34:02,118 It's about the same level of quality as Waterworld, actually. 687 00:34:02,118 --> 00:34:06,118 But the fact that it was a 3 hour long Kevin Costner vanity project, 688 00:34:06,118 --> 00:34:08,487 released just a week after Titanic, 689 00:34:08,487 --> 00:34:10,516 made it a very easy target for critics. 690 00:34:10,639 --> 00:34:13,308 What is Kevin Costner even up to, these days? 691 00:34:13,308 --> 00:34:16,309 (typing) Kevin Costner. 692 00:34:25,312 --> 00:34:27,638 I mean, hey. Good luck Kevin. 693 00:34:35,328 --> 00:34:37,878 If you aren't familiar, the name Alan Smithee 694 00:34:37,878 --> 00:34:41,636 is a fake name the Director's Guild came up with in 1968 695 00:34:41,636 --> 00:34:44,065 that directors who took their name off a movie 696 00:34:44,065 --> 00:34:45,549 were required to use instead. 697 00:34:45,549 --> 00:34:47,858 And this movie caused such a headache 698 00:34:47,858 --> 00:34:50,972 that the Directors' Guild had to officially stop allowing 699 00:34:50,972 --> 00:34:53,320 the use of the Alan Smithee name in movies. 700 00:34:53,320 --> 00:34:55,784 This movie was written by Joe Eszterhas 701 00:34:55,784 --> 00:34:57,512 and was directed by Arthur Hiller. 702 00:34:57,512 --> 00:35:01,002 It's a mockumentary about a guy whose name was actually Alan Smithee 703 00:35:01,002 --> 00:35:03,861 who directs an action movie but he hates the finished product 704 00:35:03,861 --> 00:35:06,317 so he steals the film reels and holds them ransom 705 00:35:06,317 --> 00:35:08,645 because he wasn't allowed to take his name off. 706 00:35:08,645 --> 00:35:10,326 Now behind the scenes in real life, 707 00:35:10,326 --> 00:35:13,247 Joe Eszterhas was in charge of cutting Burn Hollywood Burn 708 00:35:13,247 --> 00:35:15,663 and when Arthur Hiller saw the final version 709 00:35:15,663 --> 00:35:19,003 he hated it so much he had his name taken off the movie 710 00:35:19,003 --> 00:35:20,816 But this of course created a confusion 711 00:35:20,816 --> 00:35:23,422 because this was a movie about Alan Smithee 712 00:35:23,422 --> 00:35:26,259 and the poster said it was directed by Alan Smithee 713 00:35:26,259 --> 00:35:28,428 which you would assume was just a joke 714 00:35:28,428 --> 00:35:32,581 but no, the director actually had his name taken off the movie. 715 00:35:32,581 --> 00:35:36,151 It would take me so long to explain everything that's wrong with this movie 716 00:35:36,151 --> 00:35:37,771 so let me sum it up in four words. 717 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Not funny. 718 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Didn't laugh. 719 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 There's way too many characters, 720 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 the movie jumps all over the place 721 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Harvey Weinstein is in it. 722 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 "Eew." 723 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 There's lots of not funny parts where the camera freeze frames 724 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and there's a wall of text on screen. 725 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I'm guessing what happened is they filmed all these scenes separately 726 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and thought they were hilarious on set 727 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but when they got to the editing room they realized they had nothing to work with 728 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 so Joe Eszterhas tried to salvage it by adding a bunch of text edit jokes 729 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 which actually made the movie worse. 730 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I have no proof of this of course but it seems right to me. 731 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I'd probably do the same thing in that situation. 732 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Ok so this is a Western steampunk fusion movie 733 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 starring the Fresh Prince and the guy who plays Mr. Fischoeder in Bob's Burgers 734 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 as cowboy government agents who hunt down an evil ex-Confederate officer with no legs 735 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 who kidnaps President Ulysses S. Grant with a giant robot spider. 736 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 That's what this movie is. 737 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 (hooting) 738 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 This movie is ridiculous. 739 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I don't know what the executives at Warner Bros. were snorting in the board room 740 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 when they decided to spend over a 170 million dollars 741 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 on a movie where cowboy Will Smith fights a huge mecha spider 742 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but thank god they did because Will Smith turned down playing Neo in the Matrix to do this movie 743 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And I'd like you to imagine what it would be like if Will Smith played Neo in the Matrix. 744 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I probably would have messed the Matrix up. 745 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I would've ruined it. 746 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So I did y'all a favor. 747 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 This might not be a "good" movie 748 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but oh my god it's so funny. 749 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Plus the theme song is pretty fire. 750 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 If I may quote one of the great gangster rappers, William Will Smith, 751 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 (nonchalantly) wicki wild wild, wicki wicki wild 752 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 wicki wild, wicki wicki wild wild wild west. 753 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 wicki wild, wicki wicki wild wild west. 754 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Do you find those lyrics inspiring? 755 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I mean, I… 756 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Battlefield Earth is an action sci-fi movie based on a novel written by Ron Hubbard, the founder of Scientology 757 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 which he wrote in 1982 when he was in hiding to avoid going to prison for his numerous crimes. 758 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's about a distant future world where humanity has been enslaved by aliens called "psychlos" 759 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 which are a very obvious metaphor for L. Ron Hubbard's vitriolic hate for psychiatrists. 760 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 John Travolta, who plays the evil alien leader called Turl 761 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and has been a scientologist since 1975 762 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 is directly responsible for this movie existing. 763 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 The production company who took it on was later found to have defrauded investors out of 31 million dollars 764 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 by overreporting production costs 765 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 causing a lawsuit that forced the company to go bankrupt and shut down in 2007. 766 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 On top of that, the movie was a massive financial flop 767 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 not just because the movie and its John Travolta action figures 768 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 were an obvious Scientology recruitment tactic 769 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but because the movie itself was a visual nightmare. 770 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 The special effects are ugly, 771 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 the costumes are disgusting, 772 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and the whole movie was filmed in these crooked angles 773 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that changed multiple times a scene. 774 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 which gave a bunch of people motion sickness. 775 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's a really infamously bad movie that's been covered by a bunch of other YouTube channels over the years 776 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 so if you want more information on it, go watch one of those videos. 777 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Just don't watch the movie itself. 778 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It'll do nothing but make you nauseous and waste two hours of your time. 779 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I'm serious, don't do it. 780 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I'm sorry, you guys, conflict of interest, I can't talk about Freddy Got Fingered. 781 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 One of my friends and I watched this movie like four times during quarantine 782 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and we kinda bonded over it. 783 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And now this movie has a special place in my heart. 784 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 "Aw." 785 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So I made Nikki watch it instead. 786 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Because she's never seen it before. 787 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And here she is now. 788 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Where the hell do I even begin with this movie. 789 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Part of me thinks this movie is some kind of deep anti-comedy 790 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 meant to satirize the other gross out comedies 791 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that were popular in the early 2000s 792 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and the other part of me thinks that maybe it means nothing at all. 793 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I mean any normal human being 794 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 would read a title called 795 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Freddy Got Fingered 796 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and run away in the opposite direction. 797 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Because what the fuck is that supposed to mean? 798 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But to put it simply, this movie is about a 28 year old man 799 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 "Stop it, stop it, Mom, I'm a 28 year old man." 800 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 "Hey, baby, he's a 28 year old man." 801 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 His name is Gord and he moves to LA to be a cheese worker. 802 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And also to pursue his dream of being a professional animator. 803 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Seems pretty simple, right? Seems pretty cut and dry? 804 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But that's where you'd be wrong. 805 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Because so very many things happen in this movie 806 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that are beyond human explanation. 807 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Just to name a few, 808 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Tom Green jerks off a horse 809 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 he swings a baby around by its umbilical cord 810 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Tom Green walks around in a deer carcass 811 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And he goes scuba diving in his own toilet. 812 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - Get out of that toilet! - (bubbling, gurgling) 813 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But at the risk of sounding clinically insane 814 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and demented 815 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 there are moments in this movie that I find kind of relatable. 816 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Like this scene where the CEO of an animation company tells Gord that he doesn't like his drawings. 817 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - It sucks. 818 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And so he immediately sticks a gun in his mouth and starts screaming. 819 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - The characters are so lame, I'm a loser. 820 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I wish I was dead. 821 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - (screaming) - Wait, wait. 822 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 What makes this even funnier is that once he receives validation, 823 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 he takes the gun out of his mouth and acts like none of that ever happened at all. 824 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - Sir I can't work on this all day, I got a job at the cheese sandwich factory. 825 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 If you're mentally ill, and make art, this is the film for you. 826 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - It's time I grow up and get a job instead of acting like a little baby all the time. 827 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I can't think of anything to draw because I'm so stupid. 828 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I'm so stupid. 829 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - And this movie surprised me in so many different ways 830 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 For one, it made me laugh way more than I anticipated. 831 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - Can't you see we're both just a couple of stupid idiots. 832 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - Gord… - (mocking) Gord! Gordie! 833 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It was also weirdly based at times. 834 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I say weirdly because the early 2000s was a derogatory fever dream. 835 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It was like running thru the perfume department in SpongeBob 836 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but the perfume was slurs. 837 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Gord ends up asking out this nurse named Betty 838 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and she says yes, but afterwards he finds out that she's in a wheelchair. 839 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 At first I was like, oh shit, it's about to get real ableist in here 840 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Lel-lel-lel. 841 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I was truly prepared for the worst. 842 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But my expectations were subverted when Betty ended up 843 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 not only the smartest person in this whole movie 844 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but her and Gord remain in a relationship for the rest of the film. 845 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - I have a bag of jewels for you. - Gord… 846 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - They're jewels, Betty. 847 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Another interesting thing to me is that 848 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Betty constantly wants to give Gord a blow (dolphin sound) job. 849 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Here me out dude! 850 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 She asks him this so many times in the movie, 851 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that it comes off as very obviously satirical. 852 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - Gord, I don't care about jewels, I just wanna suck your cock 853 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 My life's a little hectic lately, 854 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I'm having trouble concentrating with all the skateboarding and 855 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - you sucking my penis all the time - (chuckling) 856 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And again, my expectations are subverted by Gord repeatedly asking if they can just go out on a date. 857 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - I just think if we went out on at least one date 858 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and you didn't do any sucking right now 859 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that would make the whole sucking to date ratio 860 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 far more balanced, you know? 861 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - This could be a play on the trope of male protagonists in comedy especially 862 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 being obsessed with sex 863 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And not only that but women being ultra sexualized in these movies. 864 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Not all the subversion in this movie is good, though, necessarily. 865 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 If you were wondering how the movie got its title, 866 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I shit you not, about 50 minutes into the film, 867 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Gord frames his dad for "fingering" his brother. 868 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - At least I don't touch Freddy. 869 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 He fingers him. 870 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - His brother who is like 25 and doesn't even live with them. 871 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - He's a molester! 872 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 He's a child molester! 873 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - But CPS literally goes into his apartment and takes him to the molestation hospital. 874 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Is this shocking? 875 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Uh, yes. 876 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I don't know if it's shocking compared to the other things that happen in this movie. 877 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 (screaming) 878 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Is it in poor taste? 879 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Uh…luhh…luhh… 880 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Maybe. 881 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But this whole framing of the fingering 882 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 is the canon event that leads to the finale of the film. 883 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 When Gord pranks his dad by 884 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 abducting him in the middle of the nightand taking him to Pakistan. 885 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - You're fucking dead. 886 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 They could write books and novels and college theseses 887 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 about everything else that happen between then and the ending 888 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but just know that this movie ends with Gord and his dad being covered in elephant c—(censor beep) 889 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 (elephant trumpeting) 890 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Speaking of which, there's an elephant in this room! 891 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 The elephant is that I actually kinda like this movie. 892 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Also the elephant is coming. 893 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Is that so wrong? 894 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And is it so wrong that maybe kinda 895 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I might be attracted to Tom Green in this movie? 896 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Is it ok that he might be the Pete Davidson of the 90s? 897 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Shut up. 898 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 As far as career-ruining films go, 899 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Tom Green took the failure of Freddy very very well. 900 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 He even showed up to accept his Golden Razzie. 901 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 He rolled out his own red carpet too. 902 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - Well done you guys. Give him some space. 903 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Thank you very much. 904 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Celebrate your successes 905 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and your failures. 906 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Evasive] A remake of an italian film from 1974 907 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Swept Away is a movie where Madonna plays the dumbest 908 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 most unlikable rich woman in the world 909 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 who gets marooned on an island with an Italian sailor 910 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 who hates her and sexually assaults her. 911 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 3 minutes after that 912 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 there's a time skip and suddenly they're in love. 913 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's a nasty nasty nasty movie 914 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and I don't even wanna talk about it. 915 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It was so bad it caused Madonna to give up on acting entirely. 916 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's a disaster. Absolute agony to watch. 917 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Especially when you consider the movie was directed by Madonna's then-husband Guy Ritchie. 918 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Madonna later divorced Guy Ritchie in 2008 919 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but in my opinion queen should've divorced Guy Ritchie on the spot 920 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 for even suggesting this movie. 921 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Madonna] Ugh. It was rough. 922 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 There's nothing glamorous about it, then you were really mean to me. 923 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Mrs. Ritchie. 924 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I just want to slap you on camera. 925 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Why, Mrs. Ritchie? 926 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 For all those times you let Adriano slap me and never yelled cut. 927 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Ritchie] One more. 928 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Madonna] And all those times they threw octopuses on me. 929 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And all those times you made me stay in the freezing cold ice water. 930 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And all those times you made me run down the sand dunes. 931 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And all those times you ate my food. 932 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And you didn't pay me. 933 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And you never said thank you. 934 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 (crying) 935 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I'm not gonna lie, I was riding the high 936 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 of actually enjoying Freddy Got Fingered 937 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 when Gigli came in and literally snuffed the life out of me. 938 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Gigli is a movie. 939 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's about a mobster named Gigli 940 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 played by Benjamin, Benny Boy, Affleck. 941 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Much like this review on Letterboxd, 942 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I too hope Gigli k—(dolphin noises) himself. 943 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Because not only does he abduct a mentally challenged teenager, 944 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and abuse him while holding him for ransom, 945 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 What if I smack you in the fucking head? 946 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 He's also just cringe. 947 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Unforgivably so. 948 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 J.Lo. is also in this movie, unfortunately 949 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and she plays this other mobster or mobsterette 950 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 who is supposed to help him take care of this mentally disabled kid 951 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and she also just happens to be a lesbian. 952 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It means I'm a lesbian. 953 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Or should I say, the least convincing lesbian in film history. 954 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 No lesbians were consulted in the making of this movie. 955 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Because what the fuck is this? 956 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's turkey time. 957 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Huh? 958 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Gobble gobble. 959 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 You may not be able to tell 960 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because this is the weirdest way I've ever heard anyone describe it 961 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but she's talking about eating (dolphin sound) ussy here. 962 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I really don't know who told J.Lo. 963 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 or whoever wrote this script 964 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that lesbians call that turkey time. 965 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But whoever it was deserves to be taken out behind a barn and shot. 966 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Of course Gigli doesn't respect her sexuality. 967 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Your girlfriends, they're at a natural disadvantage. 968 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 They might try hard but they're not just backed up 969 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 by millions of years of genetic engineering. 970 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 He whines and complains throughout the whole movie about 971 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Oh, it's not fair, she's a lesbian but I'm attracted to her. 972 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And I wanna be with her. 973 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 You know why I'm fucking sad? 974 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Because I've got this fucking 975 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 beautiful, sexy, gorgeous heartthrobba-rama 976 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 fucking smart, amazing, bombshell 977 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 17 on a fucking 10 scale girl 978 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 sleeping on the bed right next to me. 979 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 She's a stone cold d—(vine boom)—yke. 980 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 A fucking untouchable, unaffable 981 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 brick wall fucking d—(vine boom)—kossaurus rex. 982 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 (mocking) Eugh…eugh… 983 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And after enough complaining, Ricki starts doing deeds with him. 984 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's not like this is realistic at all in anyway, 985 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but in the hypothetical scenario 986 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 where for some reason a lesbian had sex with a guy 987 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 it would not be with this guy. 988 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 He's always like licking his teeth and shit. 989 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But luckily there's not just lesbian cringe, 990 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 This ain't fucking lesbian talk circle time! 991 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 There's also plenty of heterosexual cringe. 992 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 God bless you penis. 993 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And gay cringe. 994 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I'm not gay! 995 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Despite this movie literally being about mobsters, 996 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 nothing mobster-related really happens in this movie until the last 30 minutes 997 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 where for some reason Al Pacino is here. 998 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 You piece of shit! 999 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I'm sure this is Al Pacino's favorite role of all time 1000 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 right up there next to Jack and Jill. 1001 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Ok, come on, low bat it here pitcher, we got em. 1002 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Ho! 1003 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Ho! 1004 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But to give it to you straight, 1005 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 the movie ends with Gigli leaving the mentally disabled kid 1006 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 on a random beach with the cast of Baywatch. 1007 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And it's literally played out like it's supposed to be this inspirational thing. 1008 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Like a tearjerker or something. 1009 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 (inspirational music) 1010 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Meanwhile, Gigli and Ricki ride off into the sunset 1011 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 just as she's telling him that he should wear some makeup. 1012 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 You know I bet you'd look awesome in some mascara. 1013 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Do not watch this movie. 1014 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 You will get a UTI. 1015 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Or that other thing. 1016 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Evasive] Ok first of all this movie is Catwoman in name only. 1017 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Despite being a DC comics movie, 1018 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 the Catwoman of this movie has pretty much nothing to do with the Catwoman from Batman. 1019 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 This character has a different name 1020 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 lives in a different city 1021 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and gets her cat superpowers from a magic cat burping in her mouth. 1022 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's just so stupid, it's actually really fun to watch. 1023 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Especially the CGI Halle Berry during the action scenes 1024 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 it's so funny. 1025 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 As you might expect this movie bombed hard 1026 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 probably because they put it out around the same time as Spiderman 2. 1027 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 (laughing) 1028 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 (laughing) 1029 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's a pretty infamous superhero movie now 1030 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and the director Pitof was basically laughed out of Hollywood 1031 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and never directed a movie again. 1032 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But Halle Berry embraced this movie was a flop 1033 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and she even showed up in person to accept her Razzie award. 1034 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 First of all I wanna thank Warner Bros. 1035 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 (crowd laughing) 1036 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Thank you for putting me in a piece of shit god-awful movie. 1037 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 (crowd laughing, cheering) 1038 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 (Berry cheering) 1039 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Dirty love is a… 1040 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 "comedy", 1041 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 created by Melissa McCarthy's cousin, 1042 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 notorious anti-vaxxer and Masked Singer judge, Jennifer McCarthy. 1043 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 She stars as a woman who gets dumped by her boyfriend and her life falls apart. 1044 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's really unhinged but not in a funny kind of way. 1045 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 More in a "I'm born uncomfortable and I wanna leave the room," kind of way. 1046 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I actually had a hard time finding clips of this movie online 1047 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because it's pretty obscure and nobody likes it. 1048 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's mostly badly delivered jokes and gross out humor 1049 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 with a feminine spin. 1050 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And by feminine spin 1051 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I, of course, mean period jokes 1052 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Like this scene where a bleeding Jenny McCarthy 1053 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 goes to a grocery store in white skirt and no underwear 1054 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and almost bleeds out on the floor. 1055 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 You know, relatable comedy for women. 1056 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Just girly things. 1057 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Hashtag just girly things. 1058 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Just girly things. 1059 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's a girly thing so you wouldn't understand, boys. 1060 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's a girly thing. 1061 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Hashtag just girly things. 1062 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's a girly thing, it's a girly thing. 1063 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 (sing-song) Hashtag just girly things. 1064 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So this a sequel to Basic Instinct 1065 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 an erotic murder mystery thriller from the early 90s 1066 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that's maybe best remembered today for this scene 1067 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 where Newman from Seinfeld sees Sharon Stone's 1068 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 bare, uncensored (censor beep)-ssy in an interrogation room. 1069 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 The original was nominated for a few Razzies in its day 1070 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but it was a massive box office hit 1071 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and is today remembered as a pretty solid neo-noir thriller. 1072 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Now, Basic Instinct 2 on the other hand only exists 1073 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because Sharon Stone was promised 14 million dollars to star in the movie. 1074 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 When the producers tried to cancel it, 1075 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 she sued them to force them to make it. 1076 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Don't take it so hard. 1077 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Even Oedipus didn't see his mother coming. 1078 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Evasive] It's kind of hard to talk about this movie without spoiling a bit of the original. 1079 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But I will say that overall I didn't hate this movie. 1080 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But I also barely remember anything about the plot 1081 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and I only saw it a couple of months ago. 1082 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It rehashes a lot of the same story beats and plot points as the original, 1083 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 just not as good. 1084 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Would I call it a terrible movie? 1085 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 No, not really. 1086 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But compared to the original, 1087 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 it's pretty bland and forgettable. 1088 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But that's what happens when your only reason for making a movie 1089 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 is to avoid a massive lawsuit. 1090 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Gotta love showbiz, baby. 1091 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I Know Who Killed Me is a horror movie starring Lindsay Lohan 1092 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 as a girl who is killed by a serial killer 1093 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but survives and wakes up in the hospital saying she's someone else. 1094 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 This movie was released in July 27, 2007 1095 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 right at the peak of the tabloid frenzy about Lindsay Lohan 1096 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and her struggles with alcohol and drug addiction 1097 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 there was a lot of attention on the movie while it was filming. 1098 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Especially because Lohan checked into rehab the first time 1099 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 a month into the production. 1100 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 The film set was swarmed with so much paparazzi 1101 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that some of them even showed up in the background of a few shots in the movie. 1102 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Then a couple months after filming wrapped, 1103 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Lohan was arrested for drunk driving. 1104 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Then on July 24th, just three days before the movie was released, 1105 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Lohan was arrested for drunk driving again 1106 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and couldn't even attend the premiere. 1107 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 All of this negative media attention made Lindsay Lohan enemy number one in Hollywood. 1108 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Critics eviscerated this movie. 1109 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But in a year since its release, 1110 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 this film has kind of become a cult classic among horror movie fans. 1111 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's been screened in theaters many times over the last decade. 1112 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I've seen a lot of people online compare it to giallo movies, 1113 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 an Italian film genre popular in the 60s and 70s 1114 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that mixed elements of murder movies, slashers, and erotica. 1115 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 The influence of giallo is definitely present here. 1116 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's a stylish weird thriller 1117 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and Lohan's background made her kind of perfect for the role 1118 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 as the main character quickly transforms from a sweet high school girl 1119 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 into a deeply traumatized young woman with a robotic hand. 1120 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's definitely not for everyone, myself included, 1121 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but if you're into weird gory horror movies, 1122 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 there's a lot to vibe with here. 1123 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's a much better movie than Norbit, that's for sure. 1124 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Have you ever seen Norbit? 1125 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Ooh! Ah! Bitches! 1126 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 (screaming) 1127 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 (screaming) 1128 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 The Love Guru is a movie 1129 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 written by, directed by, and starring Mike Meyers 1130 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that's mostly remembered as the movie 1131 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that completely tanked his career 1132 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and caused him to step away from Hollywood for 8 years. 1133 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Critics and audiences both hated it. 1134 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 With critics calling it 1135 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 lazy, immature, mindless, pitiable, insulting, painful, gross, contemptuous, racist, and unlikable, 1136 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 among many other things. 1137 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But don't take their word for it. 1138 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Take my word for it. 1139 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I don't have any other words for it, 1140 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that pretty much sums it up. 1141 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Here's a scene they use in the trailer. 1142 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Woah! How did you get there? 1143 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 (groans) 1144 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 This little guy scared the crap out of me. 1145 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Think I might have to do a panty check, 1146 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I might have some monkey mustard back there. 1147 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Who is this prick? 1148 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Shh. 1149 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Man, how do you do? Shrimp? 1150 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 What did you call me, jagomoe? 1151 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I'm sorry I didn't catch your gnome—name! 1152 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 You are a midget. 1153 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Evasive] The plot of this movie is Mike Myers 1154 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 plays a self-help guru named Maurice Pitka 1155 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 who was raised in India 1156 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 wears a chastity belt 1157 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and dreams of being on Oprah. 1158 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 He's hired by the Toronto Maple Leaves 1159 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 to help their star player get back together with his wife 1160 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because he is the Love Guru 1161 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and only he can save their marriage. 1162 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's basically a one note movie 1163 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that feels like it was written by a 10 year old boy. 1164 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Every seen goes on for way too long, 1165 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Mike Myers keeps laughing at his own jokes 1166 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and pretty much every line is about 1167 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 poop, pee, farts, balls, or dicks, 1168 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 with many of the characters' names being dick jokes. 1169 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 We got Tugginmypudha, 1170 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 coach Cherkov, 1171 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Le Coq, 1172 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Dick Pants, 1173 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 (Evasive laughing) 1174 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's not funny that John Oliver is named Dick Pants. 1175 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 (laughing) 1176 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Evasive] It's not… (laughing) 1177 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Evasive] Ok, I'll be the first to say that 1178 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I don't think any of the Transformers movies are particularly good. 1179 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 That being said, 1180 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen is definitely the worst one, 1181 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 if only for how offensive and annoying it is. 1182 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Pretty much every Transformer introduced in this movie 1183 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 either talks with a racist accent, 1184 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 or the most annoying cartoon voice imaginable. 1185 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And when it isn't being annoying or racist, 1186 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 it's doing shit like this. 1187 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Name's Wheelie. Hah…hah… 1188 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Say my name, say my name. Hah…hah… 1189 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 What are you allowing to happen to your foot just now? 1190 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 At least he's faithful, Sam. 1191 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Yeah, well, he's faithful, and he's nude and he's perverted. 1192 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Hah…hah…hah… 1193 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 (sighs) 1194 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Like is it any wonder Megan Fox quit the series after this? 1195 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Sadly this movie ended up making 836 million dollars 1196 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 which was about a hundred million more dollars than Up made that same year. 1197 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 This thing's gonna give me a heart attack, I swear. 1198 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - That's 'cause you was a wuss. - You did force me into that car, right? 1199 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Oh I think he scared. 1200 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Hey Mudflap. What we gonna do with this shrimp taco? 1201 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Lemme just pop a cap in his ass, throw him in the truck, 1202 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and then nobody gonna know nothing, y'know what I mean? 1203 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - No one's gonna pop any caps in any asses. Ok? 1204 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - I've had a hell of a day. 1205 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Why don't you get a haircut with your bitch ass? 1206 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 What can I even say about this movie 1207 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that hasn't been said a thousand times already? 1208 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 This live action trashfire directed by M. Night Shyamalan 1209 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 attempted to condense the first season of an amazing animated TV show 1210 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 into a 90 minute CGI-filled mess. 1211 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Maybe if you watch this, 1212 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 having never seen the original series, 1213 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 it's just another lame Hollywood fantasy action movie. 1214 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But for fans of the series, this was offensively bad. 1215 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 The creators of the show were not allowed to give any input on the movie's development. 1216 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Beloved characters were made one-dimensional and pointless, 1217 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 major plot points were skipped over, 1218 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 characters' names are pronounced wrong. 1219 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 How do you even screw that up? 1220 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 This movie made a lot of money 1221 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but was so hated by audiences 1222 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that Paramount must have known that they couldn't fool people twice 1223 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and cancelled plans to adapt the other 2 seasons, 1224 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 effectively sinking the career of the kid who played Aang before it even began. 1225 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's just sad. 1226 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 The whole movie is a sad waste of source material. 1227 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 You'd probably have a better time playing the official Wii game 1228 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 than watching this movie. 1229 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 (vaguely Asian music) (wheels skidding) 1230 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Evasive] Ok, maybe not. 1231 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 (dramatic, haunting piano) 1232 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Alright, Razzies, respectfully, 1233 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 what the fuck? 1234 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I wouldn't call myself a Twilight fan, 1235 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I never read the books and I didn't watch the movies until recently, 1236 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but even I know that the last movie in the Twilight series 1237 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 isn't that bad a movie. 1238 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's ridiculous, sure, but out of all the movies in this series, 1239 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 it's definitely the most interesting and most exciting entry aside from the first one. 1240 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Obviously they gave it Worst Picture as a sort of dig at the entire series, 1241 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 since none of the others had won Worst Picture before, 1242 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but come on. 1243 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Breaking Dawn Part 2 is fun. 1244 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's got a big fight scene on a frozen lake, 1245 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 it's got a girl named Renesmee, 1246 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 it concludes one of the most iconic and most stupid blockbuster series of all time. 1247 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's so entertaining and over the top 1248 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that even if you hate Twilight and everything about it, 1249 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 you can't tell me that this movie is worse than the Adam Sandler movie 1250 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 where he shows a 13 year old impregnating his teacher. 1251 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 You can't tell me that. 1252 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Because you'd be wrong. 1253 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Let me start this one off by 1254 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 showing you the list of people that were involved in this movie. 1255 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And that's not even all of them. 1256 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Movie 43 is a compilation of raunchy comedy sketches 1257 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 each directed by different people. 1258 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Made on an impossibly cheap budget of 6 million dollars, 1259 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 this thing took 3 whole years to film 1260 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because the producers worked around actors' schedules 1261 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 to maximize how many famous people could show up on this. 1262 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 The sketches themselves are a relentless onslaught of dirty shock humor. 1263 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 There's one where Hugh Jackman has balls on his face. 1264 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 There's one where Chloe Grace Moretz spills period blood on the wall. 1265 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 There's one where a horny cat pisses on Elizabeth Banks. 1266 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 There's one where Kieran Culkin wants to leave a hickey on Emma Stone's vagina. 1267 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 My personal favorite was the one where Anna Faris asks Chris Pratt 1268 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 to poop on her during sex. 1269 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - So he takes some— - Poop Viagra. 1270 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And then gets hit by car. 1271 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I love you, I wanna marry you. 1272 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Oh my god. Doug, no! 1273 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 If you're feeling sadistic, 1274 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 throw this on, on your next bad movie night with friends. 1275 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's got a little something for everyone. 1276 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I don't even know what the hell Movie 43 means. 1277 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But I'm in Movie 43, maybe I'm in Movie 44. 1278 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I don't know. 1279 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So if you're unfamiliar, Kirk Cameron was a child actor in the 80s 1280 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 who took a hard right turn into Evangelical Christianity 1281 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and has since appeared almost exclusively 1282 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 in low-budget Christian movies and radio programs. 1283 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Today, he's mostly known for his inflammatory publicity stunts 1284 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Like in 2020, when he organized maskless Christmas carols in LA 1285 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 to protest COVID restrictions, 1286 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 which he called "communism disguised as public health". 1287 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 You know the type. 1288 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 He's a nutcase, 1289 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and his movie had been dunked a hundred times before by YouTubers already 1290 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because for a while, this was the lowest-rated movie on IMDB, 1291 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 with an average rating of 1.3 out of 10. 1292 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Which he claimed was the result of an atheist conspiracy on Reddit. 1293 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 The whole movie takes place in one house 1294 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and almost every scene is him using weird circular reasoning 1295 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 to explain how non-Christian Christmas traditions 1296 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 had actually been Christian all along. 1297 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Like how Christmas trees were God's idea 1298 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because God created trees. 1299 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Or how the holiday isn't actually materialistic 1300 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because the ability to buy gifts 1301 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 is God's gift to humanity. 1302 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's just boring. 1303 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's just a boring movie where nothing happens 1304 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and everyone is just sitting or standing around 1305 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 not doing anything. 1306 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 The only remotely entertaining part of the whole movie 1307 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 is when all the extras have an epic dance party at the end. 1308 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 ♫ (Angels we have heard on high, trap remix style) ♫ 1309 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Fant-four-stic is a classic case of too many people having their hands in the same movie. 1310 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 The writers disagreed on everything. 1311 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 The director Josh Trank slept with a loaded gun on him 1312 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because he got death threats for casting Michael B. Jordan. 1313 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Fox executives had whole scenes cut out 1314 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and other scenes reshot without Trank's approval 1315 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because they thought his version was too dark. 1316 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Trank also put out a tweet before the movie came out 1317 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 basically disowning it. 1318 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 The end result of all of this 1319 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 was an ugly, boring mess of a movie 1320 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 where there's no real stakes or tension anywhere. 1321 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 They don't even have them become superheroes 1322 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 until halfway thru the movie 1323 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and most of the time they're just standing around 1324 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 talking and not doing anything. 1325 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 You can see the remnants of a decent movie in here 1326 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 like in this scene where Miles Teller wakes up on a hospital bed looking like Lanky Kong. 1327 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But we'll never know what the movie was supposed to be 1328 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because nobody cares. 1329 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 There's no one out there saying 1330 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 hashtag release the trank cut. 1331 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I want them to go see just a really great movie. 1332 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Something that is different from…uh… 1333 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Dr. Doom is one of the top 5 greatest characters 1334 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that ever come off a comic book—panel. 1335 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Science is really cool and this is something that…hopefully… 1336 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So 2015 was another tie 1337 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 with Fifty Shades of Grey also being awarded Worst Picture. 1338 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 This is another movie where I"m like, 1339 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 what can I possibly say about this that hasn't been said already? 1340 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's based on an erotic novel that started out as a Twilight Fanfiction, 1341 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 the stars have no chemistry 1342 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and nothing about their relationship is believable. 1343 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 The movie spawned that Love Me Like You Do song 1344 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that's haunted retail workers for almost a decade now. 1345 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's just a bad movie. 1346 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's boring and bad and it made over 500 million dollars 1347 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 so rather than repeat the same things that a 100 other YouTubers have said 1348 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I'll just leave you with a little mental image. 1349 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 See, this movie came out on Valentine's Day 2015. 1350 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I want you to visualize Kayllynn and Greg 1351 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 from Sugar Land, Texas 1352 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 who went to see this at the local AMC on Valentine's Day. 1353 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I want you to visualize Kayllynn giving Greg a dry handjob 1354 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 at the back of the theater, 40 minutes into the movie. 1355 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I want you to visualize them going to Applebees after 1356 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and eating a slightly burned chicken breast 1357 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and some unseasoned broccoli. 1358 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I want you to visualize— 1359 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 If you don't know already, 1360 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Dinesh D'Souza is a far-right political commentator 1361 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 who's been releasing propaganda films every year since 2012. 1362 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 He also pleaded guilty to campaign finance fraud in 2014 1363 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and was sentenced to 5 years probation. 1364 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 During which, he made Hillary's America: The Secret History of the Democratic Party. 1365 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Released in the summer of 2016, 1366 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Hillary's America is a movie that claims it's a documentary 1367 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but aside from a few news clips and some scripted-sounding interviews, 1368 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 much of the movie is either historical reenactments 1369 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 or D'Souza talking to terrible actors 1370 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and trying to pass it off as documentary footage. 1371 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 The movie opens with D'Souza being sentenced for fraud 1372 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 which he claims was a Democratic conspiracy to shut him up 1373 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and from there he goes to prison 1374 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and starts interviewing other prisoners about how gangs work 1375 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 You know, gangs are all about stealing, man. 1376 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 What's the biggest gang? 1377 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Right in your face. 1378 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Politicians, man. 1379 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - How does a gang make money? - Any way they can, you know? 1380 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Trafficking, smuggling, stealing, extortion, 1381 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Yeah, but how do they pull it off? 1382 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Later on, he visits the Democratic National Headquarters 1383 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and it's all done up to look like a high-tech museum 1384 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 for the glory of the Democratic Party. 1385 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Then he sneaks into the restricted part of the building 1386 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and breaks into the secret archives 1387 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 to reveal the secret information 1388 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that is literally in the curriculum of 8th Grade US History. 1389 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Like, "Hey guys, did you know that most of the slaveowners in the Civil War were Democrats? 1390 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Wow, isn't that crazy? How come no one's talking about this?" 1391 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 The sad truth is this movie sold 13 million dollars worth of tickets when it came out. 1392 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Which means that hundreds of thousands of very gullible Americans saw this in theaters. 1393 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And many probably dragged their impressionable kids to see it with them 1394 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 when all those kids wanted to do was play the new Pokémon Go game that just came out. 1395 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's depressing to think about. 1396 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 2016 was a very dark time. 1397 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But I try to figure out how we get them to have Pokémon Go do the polls. 1398 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Hey guys, I'm sorry, I can't talk about the Emoji Movie. 1399 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 You see, on a hot summer day in 2017, I actually saw The Emoji Movie in theaters 1400 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 in a room full of screaming, sugared up children. 1401 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And if you think this movie looks bad enough on its own, 1402 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 try watching it completely sober 1403 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 while a 7 year old kicks the back of your chair the whole time. 1404 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I just can't relive the trauma of that day again. 1405 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So I pass this one off to the trash guy. 1406 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Young Junko. He was the best lawyer who ever lived. 1407 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But decidingly the hammer of justice made him his walnut. 1408 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And under the pressure, he cracked. 1409 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 By his side, he had only left this note. 1410 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Sad face, cry face, trash can, water gun, squirt, sad face. 1411 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Watch the Emoji Movie in theaters for more info. 1412 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Emoji Movie is like the cinematic equivalent 1413 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 of seeing an ad for Cricket Wireless on the side of the bus. 1414 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's the same artistic merit. 1415 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's hard not to look at this movie without 1416 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 thinking of the evolution of 3D animation as a craft 1417 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 in the last four years, the way the medium improved over time, 1418 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 not just in fidelity, but the heartfelt boundary-pushing storytelling 1419 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that made animated characters come across as more tangible. 1420 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And exploring the worlds they inhabited in a surreal way, 1421 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and all that led to this, a movie about emojis. 1422 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 On a kid's cell phone. 1423 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's so impersonal, it's not like Toy Story, 1424 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 where Andy and the Toys have a clear relationship. 1425 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 In Emoji Land, you get scanned whenever the kid picks you for the text message. 1426 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Like why is this kid only texting in emojis? 1427 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 He's like a little man slut. 1428 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 The whole plot being, he wants to text a girl in his class, 1429 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and that's it. He has no connection to any of these main central characters, 1430 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 they're just a button on his phone. 1431 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's so pointless. 1432 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 The world's not interesting at all. 1433 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 The main character, Gene, is supposed to be the Meh emoji, 1434 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but he's malfunctioning, so he goes on a quest with Hand Emoji 1435 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and Jailbreak, an elite emo hacker girl emoji with blue hair 1436 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 who can access the cloud and see all the Rule 34 of herself 1437 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 made over the years. 1438 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - Oh! - [Hand] Suck it in! 1439 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 No, stop it! 1440 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Junko] It's a movie made specifically for 1441 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 loud drunk parents circa 2017 to take their iPad kids to 1442 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 so they can run around the theater and pick their ass 1443 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 while they shove a bunch of ads up their eyeballs 1444 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 You've got whole scenes explaining Candy Crush, 1445 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Just Dance, and Spotify. 1446 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's as shameless and corporate as an animated movie could possibly be. 1447 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I'm sure some belligerently wasted parent in the theater 1448 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 howled with laughter as James Corden, Hand Emoji, said "Bye Felicia." 1449 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - Bye Felicia! 1450 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Junko] I wouldn't know though, because the first time I saw Emoji Movie 1451 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 was at 2 AM on a hacked Amazon Fire Stick 1452 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 plugged into my friend's portable CRT. 1453 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 That's just about the viewing experience this movie deserves. 1454 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Evasive] But hey, for as much as a soulless cash grab that the Emoji Movie was, 1455 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 there is one good thing about it. 1456 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And that's that it is inadvertently responsible 1457 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 for causing Jordan Peele to make Get Out. 1458 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Holmes & Watson was the much anticipated reunion 1459 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 between John C. Reilly and Will Ferrell 1460 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 a duo that starred in a couple of smash hit comedies in the mid-2000s. 1461 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So when this movie released to atrocious reviews, 1462 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 it left some people scratching their heads wondering 1463 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 how two guys who worked so well together before, 1464 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 could fuck up a movie this bad. 1465 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And trust me, no matter what your sense of humor is, 1466 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 this movie is bad. 1467 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's not funny, at all, 1468 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 not even a little bit. 1469 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's just boring and hard to watch. 1470 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Right, I know. He's an onanist. 1471 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Yes. 1472 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - What's an onanist? 1473 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 He pours his own tea. 1474 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 He likes to create his own sauce. 1475 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 He is a saucier. 1476 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And the name of his restaurant is Crotch Kitchen. 1477 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 On a daily basis, he creams his own eclair. 1478 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Evasive] The plot is impossible to follow, 1479 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 the jokes fall flat on its face, 1480 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and some of the jokes were already dated 1481 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 by the time this movie came out. 1482 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Compared to Tallaadega Nights and Stepbrothers, 1483 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 everything about their delivery here just feels off. 1484 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And the blame probably rests on writer-director Etan Cohen. 1485 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Not to be confused with Ethan Coen. 1486 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Etan Cohen is a writer who built a pretty decent resumé 1487 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 in the 90s and the 2000s 1488 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and decided to branch out into directing 1489 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 with Get Hard in 2015. 1490 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Holmes & Watson was his second attempt at directing 1491 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and possibly his last 1492 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because the movie just barely didn't break even. 1493 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And since its release, Cohen seems to turn exclusively to writing. 1494 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 My theory is, the man didn't know how to direct Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly. 1495 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 He just got them together and assumed it'd be enough to carry the movie. 1496 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Because the whole thing feels like he just dressed them up in Victorian Era clothes and said 1497 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 "Just do whatever you want. We'll edit it down to just the funny parts." 1498 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And then surprise. 1499 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 None of it was funny. 1500 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Holmes] You know what I've found, 1501 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 to take the most attractive photographs, 1502 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 you need to purse your lips together like a duck-billed platypus. 1503 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 [Watson] Platypus face! 1504 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Chins up! 1505 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Hey! 1506 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Hey, girl! 1507 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Cats is a hilarious movie. 1508 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It is so funny for all the wrong reasons. 1509 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I saw this in theaters when it came out 1510 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 after a couple of very powerful weed gummies 1511 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and it is an experience I will remember for the rest of my life. 1512 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's unlike any other movie ever made. 1513 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It really is. 1514 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 ♫ Wuddly-wah, wuddly-wah ♫ 1515 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's dinner and a show. 1516 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 ♫ Wuddly-wah, wuddly-wah ♫ 1517 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 ♫ A-dooba-dooba-doo ♫ 1518 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 ♫ Tak-pity-pak-pity-pak ♫ 1519 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Released at the tail end of 2019, 1520 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Cats was an act of pure hubris from director Tom Hooper, 1521 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 who was well known in Hollywood at this point for directing 1522 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 the King's Speech, Les Misérables, and The Danish Girl. 1523 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Well I guess Tommy Boy got pretty full of himself after all those award-winners, 1524 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because for his next project, he proceeded to blow a hundred million dollars 1525 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 on a film adaptation of Cats: The Musical. 1526 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Behind the scenes, Hooper rushed the movie out the door 1527 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 so it could release in time for Christmas. 1528 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And in the process, treated the animators like complete shit. 1529 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Anonymous sources later reported that Hooper knew nothing about animation, 1530 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 made them work 90-hour weeks for months, 1531 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and was horrible, disrespectful, demeaning, and condescending 1532 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 toward everyone. 1533 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 One source said that Hooper talked to the animators 1534 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 like they were garbage 1535 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and even compared their time working on cats to slavery. 1536 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's been a few years now since Cats released, 1537 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and Tom Hooper hasn't been heard from since. 1538 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So I think it's safe to say that those allegations were completely true 1539 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and he won't be making a comeback any time soon. 1540 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 At this point, I'd like to play you a song from the movie 1541 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but YouTube would probably demonetize me if I did that. 1542 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So instead I'm gonna play you a public service announcement from the 80s. 1543 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Accident? An accident? 1544 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 There was a child in the car. 1545 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 A child? 1546 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Cats have 9 lives, children only one, 1547 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 help them live their life, buckle them into a car seat, 1548 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 no one wants a child to become a memory. 1549 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 ♫ Memory, all alone in the moonlight. ♫ 1550 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So Absolute Proof is not a movie. 1551 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 For the first time in Razzie history, 1552 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 the Razzies gave Worst Picture 1553 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 to something that was not a movie. 1554 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 This is a 2-hour long special 1555 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that aired on One America News in February 2021 1556 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 where Mike Lindell, the MyPillow guy, 1557 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 bought airtime to prove that the 2020 election was hacked by China, 1558 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 using statistics that were proven to be fake, 1559 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and interviewing experts that don't have any real credentials. 1560 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 This special was also uploaded on YouTube, 1561 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but was quickly taken down for spreading false information. 1562 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I was hoping it would at least be unintentionally funny, 1563 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but it's just really boring to watch. 1564 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 - It's mostly the MyPillow guy saying - Woah. 1565 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 talking about voting data that was given to him by a fraudster. 1566 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 At one point, he brings out a guy who claims he invented e-mail. 1567 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 You know, from creating e-mail and all these systems. 1568 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I know the power of machines. 1569 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Yeah, he created e-mails. The creator of e-mails. 1570 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I don't know, I don't have anything to say about this one. 1571 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's not a movie. 1572 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 So this is also not a movie. 1573 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Diana The Musical is a Broadway show 1574 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that was planned to open on March 31st, 2020. 1575 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Obviously, that didn't pan out, but in summer of 2020 1576 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 they were able to get the cast together to make a recording of the show. 1577 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 With heavy COVID restrictions and with no audience, of course. 1578 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Then, for some bizarre reason, 1579 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 they decided to release that recording on Netflix on October 2021 1580 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 a whole month before the show reopened on Broadway. 1581 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Obviously, this was the dumbest possible thing they could've ever done 1582 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because why would anyone who wasn't a hardcore House Windsor stan 1583 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 pay over a hundred dollars for a Broadway ticket to this cringefest 1584 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 when they could just watch the cringefest for free at home. 1585 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 This show was a complete flop, 1586 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 performing to a half-full theater every night for a month, 1587 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 until the producer put the show out of its misery 1588 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and cancelled it on December 19. 1589 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Even if it hadn't been dumped on Netflix before it opened, 1590 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 it still would've probably flopped 1591 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 because it's every bit as tone deaf as the title suggests. 1592 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 The lyrics sound like a 14 year old girl saw Hamilton and Newsies a few times 1593 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and was like, "Oh my gosh, I could do that too!" 1594 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 except it wasn't written by a 14 year old girl, 1595 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 it was written by a Tony Award-winning playwright in his 50s. 1596 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Here is just a sample of some of the lyrics this show throws at you. 1597 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 ♫ Alright, I'm no intellect. ♫ 1598 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 ♫ But maybe there's a discotheque ♫ 1599 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 ♫ where the prince could hear some Prince ♫ 1600 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 ♫ and we'd all get funkadelic ♫ 1601 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 ♫ You thought I was a ninny, ♫ 1602 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 ♫ you could mold me as you like. ♫ 1603 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 ♫ Well the skinny on that ninny ♫ 1604 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 ♫ is she's really rather bright. ♫ 1605 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 ♫ I just got a ticket to the main event ♫ 1606 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 ♫ It's the Thrilla in Manila but with Diana and Camilla ♫ 1607 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Directed by eccentric auteur Andrew Dominik, 1608 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Blonde is the most recent Worst Picture as the time I made this video 1609 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and probably the most controversial winner since Showgirls. 1610 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 It's a nearly 3 hour long, NC-17 rated movie 1611 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 about the life of Marilyn Monroe 1612 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 that takes extreme liberties with her life story 1613 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 as it's actually based on a historical fiction novel 1614 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 by Joyce Carol Oates. 1615 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 The reviews of this thing were all over the place. 1616 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 When it premiered at the Venice Film Festival, 1617 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 it received a 14-minute long standing ovation 1618 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and early critic reviews were extremely positive. 1619 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Then it released on Netflix a few weeks later 1620 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and the drama started. 1621 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 On the positive end, the movie got praised for its stunning cinematography 1622 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and for Anna De Armas' performance as Monroe. 1623 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 On the negative end, the movie was criticized for being 1624 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 exploitative, sexist, and dehumanizing, 1625 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and for brutally depicting Marilyn Monroe 1626 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 as a helpless girl relentlessly abused by the Hollywood system 1627 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 when her real life story was much more complicated than that. 1628 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And it certainly doesn't help that 1629 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Andrew Dominik doubled down on it, after the film's release, 1630 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 saying, "Criticism only hurts if you agree with it, 1631 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and I didn't agree with any of it. 1632 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 She's dead, the movie doesn't make any difference to her one way or another. 1633 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 What they mean is that the film exploited their memory of her, the image of her, 1634 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 which is fair enough. It does. That's the whole point of the movie. 1635 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 That's the whole problem with Marilyn Monroe. 1636 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Everybody feels like they know her and what's best for her." 1637 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I don't know about you guys, 1638 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I could speak on this movie more, 1639 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but I don't want to. 1640 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 This is the last movie on this list 1641 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and I'm tapping out. 1642 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I don't wanna see any of you in the comments saying, 1643 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 "Oh, Eva tapping out. 1644 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Eva not giving her real opinion. 1645 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 You're being evasive. 1646 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 You can't do that." 1647 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Thank god this is over. 1648 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 My eyeballs and my brain are absolutely fried right now. 1649 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I don't have a single thought left in my head. 1650 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 But let me go ahead and summarize my thoughts 1651 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 by sorting all these movies into 4 categories. 1652 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 These categories are 1653 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Boring Bad, Funny Bad, Not That Bad, 1654 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and Crimes against Humanity. 1655 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And there we go. 1656 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I am Evasive, 1657 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 thank you for my Patreon supporters, 1658 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 thank you to all of you for watching, 1659 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and thank you so much to my guests 1660 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 for contributing to this video. 1661 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 And hey, Razzie people, if you're watching, 1662 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Hi. 1663 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Invite me to the show sometime, maybe. 1664 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Honestly I think you guys are a little cringey 1665 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and you've made some very questionable decisions in the past 1666 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 but like…I don't care. 1667 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 In the meantime, we're going to do 1668 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 literally anything else besides watching movies. 1669 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 You know what I'm gonna do. 1670 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I'm gonna look at some clouds. 1671 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Ooh, and touch grass. 1672 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Oh I can't remember the last time I touched grass. 1673 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 I'm gonna go outside, look at some clouds, 1674 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 and touch grass. 1675 99:59:59,999 --> 99:59:59,999 Ok, bye guys.