[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:00.00,0:00:02.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What's up cinephiles,\NI'm Evasive,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:02.38,0:00:05.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and this piece of paper right here\Nmeans two things:
Dialogue: 0,0:00:05.77,0:00:08.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Number one, I am tens of\Nthousands of
Dialogue: 0,0:00:08.51,0:00:09.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,dollars in debt,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:09.82,0:00:13.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and number two, I know a lot\Nabout movies.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:13.27,0:00:14.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And since it looks like the U.S\Ngovernment
Dialogue: 0,0:00:14.56,0:00:16.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is not going to be giving me any\Ndebt relief this year,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:16.91,0:00:19.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I have no choice now but to\Ntorture myself on the Internet
Dialogue: 0,0:00:19.67,0:00:21.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for money to pay off the loans
Dialogue: 0,0:00:21.65,0:00:23.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I took out to go to film school.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:23.16,0:00:24.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(eEeEewWwWw!)
Dialogue: 0,0:00:24.01,0:00:26.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So for this video, I watched every\Nmovie that's ever won
Dialogue: 0,0:00:26.57,0:00:29.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a Razzie Award for Worst Picture\Nof the Year.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:29.01,0:00:31.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This was an extremely painful\Nexperience
Dialogue: 0,0:00:31.20,0:00:33.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I regretted my decision\Nimmediately,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:33.26,0:00:35.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but for the sake of my adoring\Nfans
Dialogue: 0,0:00:35.37,0:00:36.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and my bank account,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:36.41,0:00:38.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I went ahead and watched all 46\Nof these
Dialogue: 0,0:00:38.55,0:00:40.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,movies so I could explain them to\Nyou.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:40.36,0:00:43.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But after the grueling experience\Nof watching all these movies,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:43.03,0:00:45.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not about to tackle this\Nbreakdown alone.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:45.25,0:00:46.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I went ahead and roped in\Nanother video
Dialogue: 0,0:00:46.95,0:00:49.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,essay girly and a talking trash can
Dialogue: 0,0:00:49.03,0:00:51.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to help explain some of these\Nmovies for me.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:53.29,0:00:56.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But before I get to the movies, let\Nme explain what the Razzies are.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:59.81,0:01:02.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Golden Raspberry Awards are\Nan annual event,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:02.47,0:01:04.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,usually held the night before the Oscars,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:04.58,0:01:06.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to give out awards for the worst\Nmovies of the year.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:06.96,0:01:09.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was founded by Hollywood\Ncopywriter
Dialogue: 0,0:01:09.06,0:01:11.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,John Wilson and editor Maureen\NMurphy.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:11.39,0:01:12.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The idea for the Razzies came\Nabout
Dialogue: 0,0:01:12.90,0:01:14.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in 1980 when Wilson saw
Dialogue: 0,0:01:14.70,0:01:16.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Can't Stop the Music and Xanadu
Dialogue: 0,0:01:16.90,0:01:18.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,back to back and hated them both
Dialogue: 0,0:01:18.81,0:01:20.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so much he thought there ought
Dialogue: 0,0:01:20.08,0:01:21.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to be an award show for this type\Nof thing.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:21.96,0:01:23.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Months later, Wilson hosted an
Dialogue: 0,0:01:23.46,0:01:25.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oscars watch party at his house,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:25.36,0:01:27.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and after the Oscars had finished,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:27.41,0:01:29.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he and Murphy passed out ballots\Nto everyone at the party to vote
Dialogue: 0,0:01:29.96,0:01:31.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,on the worst movies of the year,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:31.58,0:01:33.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then he announced the\Nwinners in his living room.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:33.89,0:01:36.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Over time, the ceremony grew and\Ngrew,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:36.01,0:01:37.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and today they're considered a\Nstaple
Dialogue: 0,0:01:37.49,0:01:39.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of the Hollywood award season
Dialogue: 0,0:01:39.13,0:01:41.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as a low-budget Bizarro World\NOscars
Dialogue: 0,0:01:41.38,0:01:43.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that distributes awards in\Ncategories
Dialogue: 0,0:01:43.35,0:01:45.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,such as Worst Actor, Worst\NDirector,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:45.52,0:01:46.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and Worst Screenplay.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:46.95,0:01:49.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Unlike the qualifications for voting\Nat the Oscars, though,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:49.63,0:01:51.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,becoming a Razzie voter is very\Neasy:
Dialogue: 0,0:01:51.83,0:01:53.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,either be friends with one of the\Nproducers
Dialogue: 0,0:01:53.92,0:01:56.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or just pay a $40 membership fee.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:56.36,0:01:58.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's all it takes.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:58.10,0:01:59.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So that's the story of the Razzies.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:59.78,0:02:01.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now, are you ready to learn about\Nevery single movie
Dialogue: 0,0:02:01.86,0:02:03.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that won Worst Picture?
Dialogue: 0,0:02:04.84,0:02:05.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because I wasn't.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:05.80,0:02:08.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's 46 of these things, so I'm\Ngoing to talk about each one
Dialogue: 0,0:02:08.80,0:02:10.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just a minute or two
Dialogue: 0,0:02:10.05,0:02:11.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and hand off a few to my guests
Dialogue: 0,0:02:11.54,0:02:13.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so I don't completely lose my mind here.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:13.66,0:02:16.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Also, I put a content warning on a\Nbunch of these movies
Dialogue: 0,0:02:16.19,0:02:18.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because of the sensitive subject\Nmatter I discuss.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:18.60,0:02:22.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not trying to traumatize anybody\Nbut myself in this video...
Dialogue: 0,0:02:22.69,0:02:24.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,well, me and my guests.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:25.11,0:02:27.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I commissioned them for this,\Nso i-- it's fine.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Anybody who can swallow\Ntwo snowballs and a ding-dong
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,shouldn't have any trouble with pride.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Evasive] The first movie to win\NWorst Picture was "Can't Stop The Music".
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,A movie about the "origins"\Nof the disco group "Village People".
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I say origins in air-quotes because\Nthe Village People play themselves
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the plot is completely made-up
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and not at all how \Nthe Village People actually formed
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The movie itself is super campy\Nand full of these crazy musical numbers
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that are unironically kinda great.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's just too bad that in between\Nthose musical numbers are these scenes
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with really terrible acting \Nthat go on for way too long.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Wait a minute! I am not taking one\Nmore step 'til I know where I'm going."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Yeah, quit my job, and you\Ngot me walking the beat again!"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- "And I'm not even getting paid for it!"\N- "Hey, hold your horses."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I told ya I had a surprise for ya."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I hope so. I turned in my\Ncoin change with the toll booth."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Evasive] By 1980 the disco fad was \Nalmost over and
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,people loved to hate on\Ndisco music at the time
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so you can see why this\Nended up being such a huge bomb.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Also, shockingly, this movie marks the\Nfirst film appearance of Caitlyn Jenner
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and apparently the experience was so bad
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,she didn't appear in a movie again until\N"Jack & Jill 2011".
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And, uh, well.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Mommie Dearest is a "biopic"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,about the life of actress Joan Crawford's\Nadopted daughter Christina.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Again, I say biopic in air-quotes\Nbecause the movie was based on
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Christina Crawford's controversial memoir
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that other members of Joan Crawford's\Nfamily disavowed when it came out.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I haven't done much research on the topic
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so I'm in no position\Nto question this story.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I will say that after\Nthe movie was made
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Christina said the film was grotesque\Nand not true to her memoir.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Released just 4 years after\NJoan Crawford passed away,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this movie basically spits all over\Nher fresh grave
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and portrays her as a horrible mother
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who frequently, physically and emotionally\Nabused her daughter.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Whether or not this is actually true\Nis still a matter of debate.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Regardless of the real-life circumstances\Nbehind the movie,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Faye Dunway's performance\Nof Joan Crawford is iconic now.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,People who have unfortunately\Nexperienced emotional abuse from a parent
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,found her performance\Nscarily true to their own life experiences
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but general audiences thought\Nshe was just being outrageously campy
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and over the top the whole movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because of its reputation, the movie\Nbecame a queer cult classic over the years
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,especially in the drag community.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was even featured in the most\Nrecent season of RuPaul's Drag Race.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"No wire hangers!"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,♫ No more wire hangers ♫\N♫ Ah, ah! ♫
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,♫ No, no, wire hangers ♫\N♫ No, no, no, no ♫
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Evasive] Inchon is a movie about\Nthe battle of Incheon in the Korean War.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was financed and produced\Nby the Unification Church,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a movement that was and still is\Nconsidered a dangerous cult
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with a leader who called himself\Nthe second coming of Jesus Christ.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The film's producer was\Na very wealthy member of the church.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He said he was instructed by God\Nto make the film.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, unsurprisingly, no investors wanted\Nany part of this.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,All 46 million dollars of the budget was\Nprovided by the church and its followers.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The film itself doesn't have much\Nto do with the Unification Church.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a straightforward war movie that's\Njust boring and unremarkable.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It had some star power but only because\Nthe actors in it were paid a lot of money.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,With Laurence Olivier even admitting\Nbefore the movie was released
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that he was only in it for the money.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was such a flop that no one\Neven bothered to release it on home media.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The only available version\Nof the movie today
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was from an old VHS rip from when it\Nplayed on Unification Church TV channel.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The only thing worth seeing in this movie\Nwas Laurence Olivier's makeup job.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean he looks like the Joker.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This movie is just tasteless.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's based on a novel by Harold Robbins
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who was paid 600 000 dollars\Nfor the film rights
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and apparently fell asleep\Nin the screening room
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and never actually watched the movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,First of all, in the first 15 minutes,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,young Ray Liotta,\Nin his first ever movie role,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,sexually assaults the main character\Nwith a garden hose.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,After that the rest of the movie\Nis just her being forced to have sex
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with gross older men\Nin order to get ahead in Hollywood.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And you see all of it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It seems like it was trying to criticize\Nsexism in Hollywood
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but instead of handling it\Nwith any kind of nuance or respect,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the movie fully shows the sex scenes
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and does the very thing\Nit's trying to critique.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The final scene of the movie shows\Nher winning an Oscar for Best Screenplay
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and calling out the men\Nwho took advantage of her
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in her acceptance speech.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Then she's booed off stage, and leaves,\Nand the movie just ends there.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's really uncomfortable to watch.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But somehow the next movie is even worse.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ugh, god, ok.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Bolero is a movie by John Derek.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,John Derek is—\N(groan)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,John Derek was an old Hollywood actor
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who appeared in supporting roles in\Nseveral big movies in the 1940s and 50s.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In 1973 when Derek was 47 years old,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he traveled to Europe to direct\Na low-budget movie called
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Once upon a Love" starring\Na 16 year old girl named
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Mary Cathleen Collins".
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,During the production—\N(retching)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm sorry.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,During the production, \NJohn Derek left his wife
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and groomed Mary Collins\Ninto a sexual relationship,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,With the two staying in Europe\Nuntil she turned 18
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so he could avoid \Nstatutory (censor beep) charges.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When they got married a few years later,\Nshe changed her name to Bo Derek
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and proceeded to star in all of his movies\Nuntil he died in 1998.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(retching)\N(vomit squelching)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm sorry.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So anyway, Bolero was a movie\Nabout a young woman fresh from college
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who travels to Morocco in Spain\Nto lose her virginity.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If that wasn't bad enough,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this movie features a full-frontal\Nnudity scene with a 14 year old girl.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not an actress playing a 14 year old girl.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,An actual 14 year old girl.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(retching, vomit squelching)\N(coughing)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you've never seen any\NRambo movies before
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the image you probably associate\Nwith the word "Rambo"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is the one where\Nhypermasculine Sylvester Stallone
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is firing a machine gun\Nwithout a shirt on.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But see, that's actually from this movie,\N"Rambo First Blood: Part II",
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which has very little to do\Nwith Part 1 at all.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The whole point of\Nthe first Rambo movie was that
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Rambo was a Vietnam War veteran\Nwith severe PTSD
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who snaps and kills a bunch of\Nsmall-time cops who treat him like shit.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This sequel, on the other hand
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,throws that tragic anti-war character\Nout the window
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as the US government sends him\Nback to Vietnam
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to locate prisoners of war
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and Rambo is weirdly ok with that.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's like he immediately got over his PTSD
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and just got straight to blowing stuff up,\Nno problem.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This movie was\Na massive box office success
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and made double of what\Nthe first movie made,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so naturally, Rambo III also ditched\Nthe anti-war angle
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and sent Rambo to Afghanistan.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I dunno if someone thought\Nthe first movie was amazing,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it really sucks to see how quickly\Nthey ruined this character.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But, like, I get it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The people who went to see\Nthese sequels in theaters
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,didn't watch it for the plot.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They watched to see \NSylvester Stallone do this.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(bow twang)\N(explosion)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In the early 80s, Prince was a rising star.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And his stardom was cemented in 1984
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with the massive hit that was Purple Rain.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,After the success of Purple Rain,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Warner Brothers told Prince he was basically allowed to do anything he wanted for his next project,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,greenlighting Under the Cherry Moon without even reading the script
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the story is, Prince plays a guy in the French Rivier named Christopher
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He and his friend Tricky try to scam a rich girl out of her inheritance
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but they both end up falling in love with her.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Problem with the movie became apparent early on
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when Prince hired someone with no experience to write the script.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Then 16 days into filming, the director quit.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And Prince took over even though he had no experience directing a movie before.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The end result was a movie that features what I can only describe as
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Acting.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Don't try anything funny.\NNot this time, Christopher."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I want the money or I throw you both out onto the street."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(gasp)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"That's right, [inaudible]"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Throw me onto the street?"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's bizarre, it's one of those movies where the acting is so bad it loops around to being funny
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which has given the movie a bit of a cult following over the years
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that and the soundtrack is amazing
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like with Purple Rain Prince released an album with the movie that went Platinum
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and is today remembered as one of the most iconic movies of his career
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,After Under the Cherry Moon failed, Prince tried one more time to direct a feature-length movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but that one got nominated for a bunch of Razzies too
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and after that he gave up and never tried to direct a movie again.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Also this here marks the first ever tie in Razzies history with Under the Cherry Moon tieing with
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughing)\NHoward the Duck.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughing)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Greetings, Evasive viewers, it is I, young Junko, expert in Bird Law
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I'm here to defend my client Howard T. Duck,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,star of the Razzies' Worst Film of 1986, Howard The Duck
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,For nearly the last 40 years my client's reputation has been tarnished and slandered against
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,by quack punch, chicken shit critics for this tragic box office bomb.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Central character, the Duck, the one that we're gonna be rooting for,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he's neither funny, or bit of funny."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I'm here to clear the air.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Howard the Duck is not a movie, no, it's a documentary.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I know this because I was there.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We all were.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My entire clan witnessed my client crash land on Earth
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to star in a motion picture that of which has been
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's still awful. It's bad. We're not winning this case, buddy.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I wasn't trying anything. Honest!"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is a strange movie to say the least.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Howard the Duck notoriously opens with 2 instances of
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,full frontal duck booba in the span of 30 seconds.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But the rest of the movie is this whiplash
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,between what's a squeaky clean full house type family movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that no one older than the age of 3 years old would find funny
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,followed by things like Marty McFly's mom showing off her ass and
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,pulling off a condom for Howard's corkscrew.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Howard…"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's like anti-matter Shrek where they didn't know how to mix adult humor and the kids' [inaudible] properly yet
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so [inaudible] becomes this overly long bland comedy
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with hardly any intentional laughs
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that just happens to throw in something totally obscene every now and then
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- [Howard] Oh!\N- I just can't resist your
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,intense animal magnetism.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's a lot of attempts at duck puns, most are just replacing a random phrase in a word with "duck"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"That's it. No more Mr. Nice Duck."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Even the director's name is Willard Hyuck.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's a duck name. That's a name you give a duck.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The first half of the movie has Howard pointlessly meandering
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there's no funny interactions or observations or memorable bits
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's just an aimless movie with the guy in the duck suit.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You have an entire portion of the movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,where Howard has a job as a towel boy in a sex club
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's fun for the whole family!
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, Breeders, what the hell.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Bareback bestiality and pedophilia.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh yeah, we find Howard getting a [inaudible] as a result of a [inaudible] incident.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Which also [inadubile] a Palpatine somehow returning from the dead and possessing the body of that one actor that's in every 80s movie who'd later be arrested for being a sex pervert.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Whaddya think you'd like to eat?"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I no longer need human food."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I need little boy butts.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You have a movie where a talking duck fires a giant laser
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,at a hell portal to stop a horde of alien warlords
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,from taking over the Earth
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and they still manage to make it a total snooze fest
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They try to give Howard a bit of edge
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but he still feels too kiddy and sanitized for what they're going for
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And part of that is his design.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He looks like a cross of a Furby and Mac Culkin.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There are some things I did like,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like these alien overlords are pretty cool
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,their design and their stop motion is really well done
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the sequence where Howard gets shot into space
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is pretty neat, pretty impressive to look at.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I like this sequence where Howard and [inaudible] get a [inaudible]
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and start flying away from the cops
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that was good.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, Tim Robins is in this
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Imagine having what's considered one of the best movies of all time as part of your portfolio
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then on the other end of the spectrum having Howard the Duck,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,now that's range
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Genuinely I was taken aback because some of the shots in this movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,undeniably go hard.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I feel like there's a version of this movie that could've actualy been good with less work
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like if they leaned into Howard being this cynical wise-cracking duck
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that's down on his luck who gets thrust into Earth and finds this strange new realm
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,isn't so much different from his own
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,then it's all about the bills baby put it on my belt
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[inaudible] taking that as an opportunity for a fresh start,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,slowly climbing his way up the corporate ladder
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,until becoming a national celebrity that gets caught up in 80s consumerism and greed
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,then maybe having begrudgingly involved in some of the weird sci-fi stuff like the comics, i dunno
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not sure how to defend my client, give him the chair.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Howard screams)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Evasive laughing)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Alright, I may not be able to defend Howard,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but know this: from this day forth, I will ensure every client of mine
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is proven innocent.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now for my next client, I will be defending one Bill Cosby.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Bill Co-Bill Cosby.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm good. Your Honor? I would draw. We're done here. We're done.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's Leonard, part 6.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ask anyone who's seen this movie they'll tell you
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that's when they first knew lil' Bill was a real piece of shit
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When I heard there was a comedy movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that just started on part 6
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I thought, hey, maybe this movie could be bad in a good way, at the very least
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Nope, it's just bad, it's boring, it's so boring.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If there's one thing Cosby was always a master at
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's making people very sleepy.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The whole thing was supposed to be a spoof on the spy genre,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,sorta like Naked Gun, except they actually came out a year before that movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They really just had the cameras rolling and had Bill Cosby do whatever he wanted
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's a bunch of weird sex shit
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean the clues are all there,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in the movie his wife divorced him because he slept with a 19 year old
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and his daughter is dating a much older man to further her career as an actress
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so then Leonard has to see her flash her tits on stage
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for no reason, none of these scenes add anything to the movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think Cosby just wanted to look at some young girl tits
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The whole film has this lethargic and slow energy to it
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Everything from the dialogue to the editing,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's like watching a movie at 0.5 speed.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The movie opens with Leonard and an assassin having a little shootout in a kitchen
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The joke being that what they're doing is actually helping to prep some of the food
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ok, could be funny but the pace of it all is so bizarrely off by a step
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Every gag and bit is like this, like they took something that was
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,maybe a 3 out of 10 joke at best and spread it so thin that
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you ask yourself was there even a joke at all to begin with?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The plot follows Leonard being the best agent in the world
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who's long been retired after being pulled back for one last mission
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,after a buncha animals under mind control start killing people
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yet again a god-awful 80s comedy starts of with an animal looking at a porno mag
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Here's two fucking nickels
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The entire first half is him just stumbling around tryna get back with his ex wife
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who pours soup on him—what is this gag?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Is this a fetish, Mr. Cosby? You think this was genuinely funny?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[mocking] We'll have him pour soup.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Cosby doesn't have a single funny line or hook to his character
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you can tell he's put zero effort into any of this
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's like he said "Yeah I'll do the movie but I don't wanna look too stupid,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,don't make me look too stupid."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Most of these so-called jokes are what the most boring uptight person in the world would think being silly is.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[mocking] Oh, look, wow he's being a ballerina, so girly.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, wow, he's doing a silly fitness tape, how can he subject himself to that.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, wee, it's like he thinks these things are so beneath him
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that just him doing it would be funny.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What a piece of shit.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You know what really makes me mad, though?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's completely unfair. Because everyone seems to be trying, but him.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's a part where Leonard tries to free all the animals from captivity,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I just wanna recognize this bird right here.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Who in this 5 second shot, bends the bars of his cage with his beak and breaks free
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,God bless this bird.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This bird put more effort than Bill Cosby in his own movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This bird did not deserve to be in one of the worst movies of all time.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,None of these animals did.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This ostrich didn't deserve to be betrayed with a sex criminal grinding his pudding pop on its back.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If audiences in 1987 hated this, watching it now,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with all the humor naturally diluted even further to the passage of time
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is like drinking a 40 year old can of new coke
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and when Bill's the one handing you the drink
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's safe to say you probably shouldn't drink it
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(gurgling)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Cocktail is a movie where young Tom Cruise plays a bartender in Manhattan
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,then he movies to Jamaica and falls in love with a girl
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but then he loses her and moves back to New York to win her back
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and that's pretty much it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What you see is what you get with this one.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a really mediocre movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not that good, but not that bad either.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well except for this scene where Tom Cruise stands on a bar
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and reads his shitty poetry.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is pretty cringey.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I see America drinking the fabulous cocktails I make."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"America's getting stinking on something I stir or shake."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughing)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I make drinks so sweet and snazz-ay iced tea the kamikaze,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(hollering)\Nthe sex on the beach is Schnapps made from peach
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the ball and hammer the Alabama slammer."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Unsurprisingly with Tom Cruise starring, this movie was a massive success,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,earning a ridiculous 171 million dollars on a 20 million dollar budget.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's also the movie the Beach Boys "Kokomo" song was written for.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Besides that, not much to talk about here.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm pretty sure it only won Worst Picture because this was the year Rain Man was favored to win Best Picture
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the voters probably thought it was funny to make both the Best and Worst Picture be Tom Cruise movies.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ok before making this video, I haven't actually watched any Star Trek at all.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But because I'm committed to my craft, I went ahead and watched all 6 original movies
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just so I can understand why this one is considered the worst.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,After all that, I—yeah. I get it now.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's not a horrible movie but especially compared to the previous ones in the series,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Star Trek V is pretty bad.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Pretty much everything went wrong behind the scenes.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,William Shatner directed it with no prior directing experience
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,nobody could agree on anything during the writing process,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there was a writers' strike
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,then a Teamsters strike
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They shot a lot of the movie in the Mojave Desert
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which is just as miserable as it sounds.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And after the filming was done, they only had 3 months to make the special effects,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and all the best special effects technicians in Hollywood were busy making
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Indiana Jones 3 and Ghostbusters II at the time.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Do I think this movie deserved Worst Picture?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It does some wacky things like introduce Spock's long-lost brother that he never mentioned before
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or show Kirk getting mauled by a cat woman.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But overall I really don't think it's that bad.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But to be honest, I'm not a Trekkie who had to see
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Captain Kirk show up on the Enterprise in a "Go climb a rock t-shirt"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,…So…I mean…is that bad?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I actually don't know.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Can someone in the comments tell me if that's bad, if that's out of character?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I actually don't know if I'm supposed to be mad at this or not.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Adventures of Ford Fairlane was a "comedy" starring Andrew Dice Clay.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you don't know who Andrew Dice Clay is, he was a comedian most active in the late 80s and early 90s
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who was known as the Dice Man,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which was basically a cover for him to tell the most offensive jokes he possibly could.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"And they're always on parade."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"They march down the street with t-shirts and flags saying
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'I want money for AIDS disease.' Beautiful.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want money for a fucking car, I ain't marching up and down the street
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Get a job, butt slammer."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Evasive] The movie itself is about a detective, I guess,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I dunno, it's just not funny at all.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Honestly I was on my phone the whole time because I was just so bored.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- "I got something serious to discuss."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Yeah, what is it, premature ejaculation?"\N(laughing)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Like that time we were at our parents' wedding anniversary,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I told that joke, 'What's the definition of vagina?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The box that peanuts come in!'" (laugh)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Gilbert Godfrey plays the only funny character in the movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but he dies like 25 minutes in and the rest is just a boring mess to follow.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The director Renny Harlin was also working on Die Hard 2 at the time
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which ended up in theaters at the exact same time as Ford Fairlane
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and when you look at the money comparison between the two movies
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,yeah, it's pretty obvious which movie he cared about more.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Clint Eastwood. I fucked him. Oh!"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Evasive] 1990 was another tie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with Ford Fairlane tieing with another movie from unapologetic (censor beep) phile John Derek.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In this one, Bo Derek plays a woman married to a much older man
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and when the older man dies, his ghost takes up residence in her head
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and goads her into murdering another man
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so he can possess his body and have sex with her again.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a supernatural dirty old man movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,where John Derek fantasizes about living rent-free in Bo Derek's head after he dies.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Plus this ended up being his last movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It would be poetic if it wasn't so disgusting.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Bo was very very young. Linda was very young…
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I guess I just meet them young,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,before they're wise enough to know I'm not the guy."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Anyway the acting was bad, the story was bad,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the visuals are bad,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but the real cherry on top here was this movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was the first film appearance of Donald Trump.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No joke, Trump's first movie was made by a (censor beep) phile.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He even does a little duck face in it, look at him.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Poetic.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Just watch this clip.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Woah!"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Happy (inaudible)"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Oh no! How's my driving? 1800-I'm gonna-(censor beep)-die!"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Evasive] Bruce Willis plays a master burglar fresh out of prison who
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was blackmailed into stealing some art
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but it turns out it's all part of a conspiracy to build a secret machine
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,invented by Leonardo Da Vinci that can turn lead into gold.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,At this point in his career, Bruce Willis was mainly known for Die Hard I and II.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And was looking to branch out a bit with Hudson Hawk.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But apparently he couldn't decide what he wanted the movie to be.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In an interview, one of the writers later said:
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I started to know we were in trouble when Joel and Bruce would say during filming
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You know what this is? This is a Pink Panther movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The next day they'd say
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You know what this is? This is an American James Bond movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Then it would be: You know what this is? This is North by Northwest.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I even remember someone saying:
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You know what this is? This is Casino Royale.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Eventually I realized that if every day they were saying it was something different
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,by the time we got to the editing room, we were gonna be in trouble.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So yeah, the final product is all over the place,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but the movie has developed a bit of a cult following over the years
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just because it's so…so silly
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- (screaming)\N- Honey?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Ball ball?\N- Woof!
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(dog screaming)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Evasive] Here's another movie that's really not that bad.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a World War II movie where Melanie Griffith is a half Jewish woman
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with no spy experience who signs herself up to be a spy in Berlin
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because she wants to prove herself and save her Jewish cousins who are in hiding.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Michael Douglas plays another spy
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and pre-Schindler's List Liam Neeson plays a Nazi officer.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Most of the complaints about the movie were aimed at how unbelievable Melanie Griffith is at being a spy
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because she was really bad at her job.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Like "spilling soup on Liam Neeson and taking the German kids she's nannying
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to the building her cousins are hiding in" kind of bad
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But overall it's not that awful of a movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because the plot holes and writing problems are balanced out by a good soundtrack and good cinematography
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's just average.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not bad enough to be memorable but not good enough that you'd ever wanna watch it again.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Basically the cinematic equivalent of eating at Denny's.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think 1992 was just a slow year for bad movies in general.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That same year they also nominated Newsies for Worst Picture
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and Danny DeVito for Worst Supporting Actor
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like…what? Why? How?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Once again, this is a movie that's not that bad.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a drama where Woody Harrelson and Demi Moore
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,play a financially struggling married couple in Vegas
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and Robert Redford is a filthy rich guy
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who offers the couple 1 million dollars for a 1 night stand with Demi Moore.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Honestly, it's fine.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It takes itself very seriously and it's vaguely misogynistic at points.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Also it's completely unbelievable that a man who looks like Robert Redford
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,would pay a million dollars to sleep with someone.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But in the context of the movie it all works.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Definitely not the worst movie of the year that's for sure.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean you're telling me that Indecent Proposal won Worst Picture but Mr. Nanny wasn't even nominated?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Razzie voters were asleep at the wheel this year.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In this one Bruce Willis plays a psychologist who can't see the color red
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who gets wrapped up in a murder after his colleague
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,gets killed Assassin's Creed-style and he suspects it was someone in his therapy group.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm so confused why it was even nominated for Worst Picture because this wasn't even a bad movie at all.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's surreal and weird sure but it's in a Twin Peaks style of way that still makes it unsettling and fun to watch.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Definitely a 6.5 out of 10 movie for me.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Maybe a 7 out of 10 I dunno.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is another one that became a cult hit after it was released on home video.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Partly because of this crazy sex scene in a pool that everybody wanted to see
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was even streaming on Criterion Channel at one point
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which basically means that it's certified art.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's all I have to say.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I dunno guys, some of these 90s movies aren't even bad enough to complain about.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's a lot to be said about Showgirls.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,First of all, Director Paul Verhoeven was the first to accept his Razzie award in person.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And that's kind of funny.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I'm very happy because it was much more fun than reading the reviews in September. Thank you.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(clapping, cheering)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Second of all, Showgirls isn't bad.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's actually a great movie, in my opinion, and a lot of people agree.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It is a wild movie about high budget Las Vegas strip shows
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And obviously with subject matter like that
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you're going to view the movie very differently
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,depending on your gender and sexuality.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But regardless of what kind of person you are
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the experience of watching this movie is an absolute rollercoaster
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"One. Two. Three."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Thrust it. Thrust it. Thrust it."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Come on, thrust it."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But for as over the top as this movie is\Nit's also pretty true to life.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,During his research, writer Joe [Esterhazs] interviewed
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,over two hundred strippers in Las Vegas
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the result was a shockingly realistic depiction of the lives of high profile sex workers and performers
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And a biting satire against show business in general.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Take a look at these tits.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What are these, watermelons?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is a stage, babes, it's not a patch.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,See ya.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Your ears are sticking out. They are.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Come back and see me when you get em fixed.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,See ya.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Can you spell MGM backwards? I bet you can't.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- MGM.\N- I'm impressed.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Come back when you fuck some of those baby fat off.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now in today's era of gritty HBO dramas, none of this is that shocking
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but in 1995 this was next level stuff.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Plus with the subject matter, this movie has a lot of nudity.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was rated NC-17 in America
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and to date it is the only NC-17 movie that was given a wide release in theaters.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was so explicit and controversial that MGM had to hire security at every movie theater in America
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just to make sure nobody under the age of 18 snuck into the theater.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The movie lost millions of dollars and to this day, no studio has ever dared to try and release an NC-17 movie in theaters again.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If this sounds interesting to you, I actually really recommend giving this movie a watch
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because I can't really do it justice with just words alone.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Just know what you're getting into before you turn it on
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because this movie is every bit as traumatic as it is glamorous
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And actually to prove to you how much I like this movie, watch this.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm a showgirl.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm a showgirl, baby.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm a showgirl.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In the mid-90s, Demi Moore was one of the biggest film stars in the world.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And the world was dying to know, what do Demi Moore's boobs look like?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's actually the only reason this movie exists.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They paid Demi Moore 12.5 million dollars
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the most any woman had ever been paid for a movie role at the time
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just so she would star in this movie and show her boobs to the camera.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This movie is like if Showgirls was actually bad.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Demi Moore plays an FBI agent who loses her daughter in a custody battle
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then becomes a stripper in Florida at a place called Eager Beaver
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to pay for a court appeal.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She basically girlbosses being a stripper.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not in a nuanced way like Showgirls though.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But in a stupid way that it takes itself seriously
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and is mostly boring and not believable at all.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Despite the bad reviews, the movie ended up being such a huge success
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the director-writer-producer Andrew Bergman basically quit Hollywood after this movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm pretty sure what happened is once he got Demi Moore to agree to go topless,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he basically just phoned it in for the rest of the movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because clearly the audiences who were going to see this
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,weren't watching for the plot.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But what can I say?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's showbiz, baby.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's…that's showbiz, baby.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Postman takes place in a distant future year of 2013
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,after much of humanity has been wiped out by a plague.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Kevin Costner, who also directed the movie,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,stars as a traveling Shakespeare performer that's conscripted to Caesar's Legion
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but he escapes and finds an old mail bag full of mail
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and pretends to be a mailman so he can get food
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and accidentally restarts the US postal service in the process
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Also it's almost 3 hours long.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Honestly, as most of post apocalyptic adventures go, this one isn't that bad.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's about the same level of quality as Waterworld, actually.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But the fact that it was a 3 hour long Kevin Costner vanity project,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,released just a week after Titanic,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,made it a very easy target for critics.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What is Kevin Costner even up to, these days, anyway?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(typing) Kevin Costner.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean, hey. Good luck Kevin.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you aren't familiar, the name Alan Smithee is a fake name the Director's Guild came up with in 1968
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that directors who wanted to take their name of a movie were required to use instead.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And this movie caused such a headache that the Directors' Guild had to officially stop allowing the use of the Alan Smithee name in movies.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ok so this movie was written by Joe Eszterhas and was directed by Arthur Hiller.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a mockumentary about a guy whose name was actually Alan Smithee
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that directs an action movie but he hates the finished product
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so he steals the film reels and holds them ransom
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because he wasn't allowed to take his name off it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now behind the scenes in real life,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Joe Eszterhas was in charge of cutting Burn Hollywood Burn
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and when Arthur Hiller saw the final version
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he hated it so much he had his name taken off the movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But this of course created a confusion
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because this was a movie about Alan Smithee
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the poster said it was directed by Alan Smithee
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which you would assume was just a joke
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but no, the director actually had his name taken off the movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It would take me so long to explain everything that's wrong with this movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so let me just sum it up in four words.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not funny.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Didn't laugh.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's way too many characters,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the movie jumps all over the place
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Harvey Weinstein is in it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Eew."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's lots of not funny parts where the camera freeze frames
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and there's a wall of text on screen.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm guessing what happened is they filmed all these scenes separately
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and thought they were hilarious on set
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but when they got to the editing room they realized they had nothing to work with
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so Joe Eszterhas tried to salvage it by adding a bunch of text edit jokes
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which actually made the movie worse.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I have no proof of this of course but it seems right to me.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'd probably do the same thing in that situation.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ok so this is a Western steampunk fusion movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,starring the Fresh Prince and the guy who plays Mr. Fischoeder in Bob's Burgers
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as cowboy government agents who hunt down an evil ex-Confederate officer with no legs
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who kidnaps President Ulysses S. Grant with a giant robot spider.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's what this movie is.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(hooting)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This movie is ridiculous.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't know what the executives at Warner Bros. were snorting in the board room
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when they decided to spend over a 170 million dollars
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,on a movie where cowboy Will Smith fights a huge mecha spider
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but thank god they did because Will Smith turned down playing Neo in the Matrix to do this movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I'd like you to imagine what it would be like if Will Smith played Neo in the Matrix.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I probably would have messed the Matrix up.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I would've ruined it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I did y'all a favor.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This might not be a "good" movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but oh my god it's so funny.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Plus the theme song is pretty fire.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If I may quote one of the great gangster rappers, William Will Smith,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(nonchalantly) wicki wild wild, wicki wicki wild
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,wicki wild, wicki wicki wild wild wild west.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,wicki wild, wicki wicki wild wild west.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Do you find those lyrics inspiring?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean, I…
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Battlefield Earth is an action sci-fi movie based on a novel written by Ron Hubbard, the founder of Scientology
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which he wrote in 1982 when he was in hiding to avoid going to prison for his numerous crimes.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's about a distant future world where humanity has been enslaved by aliens called "psychlos"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which are a very obvious metaphor for L. Ron Hubbard's vitriolic hate for psychiatrists.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,John Travolta, who plays the evil alien leader called Turl
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and has been a scientologist since 1975
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is directly responsible for this movie existing.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The production company who took it on was later found to have defrauded investors out of 31 million dollars
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,by overreporting production costs
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,causing a lawsuit that forced the company to go bankrupt and shut down in 2007.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,On top of that, the movie was a massive financial flop
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,not just because the movie and its John Travolta action figures
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,were an obvious Scientology recruitment tactic
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but because the movie itself was a visual nightmare.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The special effects are ugly,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the costumes are disgusting,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the whole movie was filmed in these crooked angles
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that changed multiple times a scene.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which gave a bunch of people motion sickness.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a really infamously bad movie that's been covered by a bunch of other YouTube channels over the years
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so if you want more information on it, go watch one of those videos.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Just don't watch the movie itself.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It'll do nothing but make you nauseous and waste two hours of your time.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm serious, don't do it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm sorry, you guys, conflict of interest, I can't talk about Freddy Got Fingered.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,One of my friends and I watched this movie like four times during quarantine
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and we kinda bonded over it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And now this movie has a special place in my heart.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Aw."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I made Nikki watch it instead.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because she's never seen it before.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And here she is now.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Where the hell do I even begin with this movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Part of me thinks this movie is some kind of deep anti-comedy
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,meant to satirize the other gross out comedies
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that were popular in the early 2000s
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the other part of me thinks that maybe it means nothing at all.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean any normal human being
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,would read a title called
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Freddy Got Fingered
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and run away in the opposite direction.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because what the fuck is that supposed to mean?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But to put it simply, this movie is about a 28 year old man
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Stop it, stop it, Mom, I'm a 28 year old man."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Hey, baby, he's a 28 year old man."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,His name is Gord and he moves to LA to be a cheese worker.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And also to pursue his dream of being a professional animator.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Seems pretty simple, right? Seems pretty cut and dry?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But that's where you'd be wrong.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because so very many things happen in this movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that are beyond human explanation.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Just to name a few,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Tom Green jerks off a horse
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he swings a baby around by its umbilical cord
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Tom Green walks around in a deer carcass
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And he goes scuba diving in his own toilet.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Get out of that toilet!\N- (bubbling, gurgling)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But at the risk of sounding clinically insane
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and demented
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there are moments in this movie that I find kind of relatable.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Like this scene where the CEO of an animation company tells Gord that he doesn't like his drawings.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- It sucks.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And so he immediately sticks a gun in his mouth and starts screaming.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- The characters are so lame, I'm a loser.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I wish I was dead.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- (screaming)\N- Wait, wait.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What makes this even funnier is that once he receives validation,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he takes the gun out of his mouth and acts like none of that ever happened at all.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Sir I can't work on this all day, I got a job at the cheese sandwich factory.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you're mentally ill, and make art, this is the film for you.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- It's time I grow up and get a job instead of acting like a little baby all the time.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I can't think of anything to draw because I'm so stupid.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm so stupid.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- And this movie surprised me in so many different ways
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,For one, it made me laugh way more than I anticipated.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Can't you see we're both just a couple of stupid idiots.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Gord…\N- (mocking) Gord! Gordie!
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was also weirdly based at times.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I say weirdly because the early 2000s was a derogatory fever dream.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was like running thru the perfume department in SpongeBob
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but the perfume was slurs.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Gord ends up asking out this nurse named Betty
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and she says yes, but afterwards he finds out that she's in a wheelchair.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,At first I was like, oh shit, it's about to get real ableist in here
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Lel-lel-lel.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was truly prepared for the worst.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But my expectations were subverted when Betty ended up
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,not only the smartest person in this whole movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but her and Gord remain in a relationship for the rest of the film.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I have a bag of jewels for you.\N- Gord…
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- They're jewels, Betty.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Another interesting thing to me is that
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Betty constantly wants to give Gord a blow (dolphin sound) job.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Here me out dude!
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She asks him this so many times in the movie,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that it comes off as very obviously satirical.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Gord, I don't care about jewels, I just wanna suck your cock
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My life's a little hectic lately,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm having trouble concentrating with all the skateboarding and
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- you sucking my penis all the time\N- (chuckling)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And again, my expectations are subverted by Gord repeatedly asking if they can just go out on a date.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I just think if we went out on at least one date
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and you didn't do any sucking right now
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that would make the whole sucking to date ratio
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,far more balanced, you know?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- This could be a play on the trope of male protagonists in comedy especially
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,being obsessed with sex
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And not only that but women being ultra sexualized in these movies.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not all the subversion in this movie is good, though, necessarily.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you were wondering how the movie got its title,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I shit you not, about 50 minutes into the film,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Gord frames his dad for "fingering" his brother.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- At least I don't touch Freddy.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He fingers him.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- His brother who is like 25 and doesn't even live with them.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- He's a molester!
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He's a child molester!
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- But CPS literally goes into his apartment and takes him to the molestation hospital.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Is this shocking?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Uh, yes.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't know if it's shocking compared to the other things that happen in this movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(screaming)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Is it in poor taste?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Uh…luhh…luhh…
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Maybe.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But this whole framing of the fingering
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is the canon event that leads to the finale of the film.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When Gord pranks his dad by
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,abducting him in the middle of the nightand taking him to Pakistan.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- You're fucking dead.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They could write books and novels and college theseses
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,about everything else that happen between then and the ending
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but just know that this movie ends with Gord and his dad being covered in elephant c—(censor beep)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(elephant trumpeting)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Speaking of which, there's an elephant in this room!
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The elephant is that I actually kinda like this movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Also the elephant is coming.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Is that so wrong?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And is it so wrong that maybe kinda
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I might be attracted to Tom Green in this movie?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Is it ok that he might be the Pete Davidson of the 90s?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Shut up.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,As far as career-ruining films go,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Tom Green took the failure of Freddy very very well.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He even showed up to accept his Golden Razzie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He rolled out his own red carpet too.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Well done you guys. Give him some space.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thank you very much.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Celebrate your successes
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and your failures.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Evasive] A remake of an italian film from 1974
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Swept Away is a movie where Madonna plays the dumbest
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,most unlikable rich woman in the world
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who gets marooned on an island with an Italian sailor
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who hates her and sexually assaults her.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,3 minutes after that
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there's a time skip and suddenly they're in love.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a nasty nasty nasty movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I don't even wanna talk about it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was so bad it caused Madonna to give up on acting entirely.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a disaster. Absolute agony to watch.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Especially when you consider the movie was directed by Madonna's then-husband Guy Ritchie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Madonna later divorced Guy Ritchie in 2008
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but in my opinion queen should've divorced Guy Ritchie on the spot
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for even suggesting this movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Madonna] Ugh. It was rough.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's nothing glamorous about it, then you were really mean to me.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Mrs. Ritchie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I just want to slap you on camera.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Why, Mrs. Ritchie?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,For all those times you let Adriano slap me and never yelled cut.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Ritchie] One more.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Madonna] And all those times they threw octopuses on me.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And all those times you made me stay in the freezing cold ice water.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And all those times you made me run down the sand dunes.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And all those times you ate my food.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And you didn't pay me.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And you never said thank you.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(crying)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not gonna lie, I was riding the high
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of actually enjoying Freddy Got Fingered
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when Gigli came in and literally snuffed the life out of me.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Gigli is a movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's about a mobster named Gigli
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,played by Benjamin, Benny Boy, Affleck.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Much like this review on Letterboxd,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I too hope Gigli k—(dolphin noises) himself.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because not only does he abduct a mentally challenged teenager,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and abuse him while holding him for ransom,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What if I smack you in the fucking head?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He's also just cringe.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Unforgivably so.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,J.Lo. is also in this movie, unfortunately
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and she plays this other mobster or mobsterette
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who is supposed to help him take care of this mentally disabled kid
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and she also just happens to be a lesbian.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It means I'm a lesbian.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Or should I say, the least convincing lesbian in film history.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No lesbians were consulted in the making of this movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because what the fuck is this?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's turkey time.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Huh?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Gobble gobble.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You may not be able to tell
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because this is the weirdest way I've ever heard anyone describe it
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but she's talking about eating (dolphin sound) ussy here.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I really don't know who told J.Lo.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or whoever wrote this script
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that lesbians call that turkey time.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But whoever it was deserves to be taken out behind a barn and shot.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Of course Gigli doesn't respect her sexuality.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Your girlfriends, they're at a natural disadvantage.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They might try hard but they're not just backed up
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,by millions of years of genetic engineering.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He whines and complains throughout the whole movie about
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, it's not fair, she's a lesbian but I'm attracted to her.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I wanna be with her.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You know why I'm fucking sad?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because I've got this fucking
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,beautiful, sexy, gorgeous heartthrobba-rama
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,fucking smart, amazing, bombshell
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,17 on a fucking 10 scale girl
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,sleeping on the bed right next to me.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She's a stone cold d—(vine boom)—yke.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,A fucking untouchable, unaffable
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,brick wall fucking d—(vine boom)—kossaurus rex.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(mocking) Eugh…eugh…
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And after enough complaining, Ricki starts doing deeds with him.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's not like this is realistic at all in anyway,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but in the hypothetical scenario
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,where for some reason a lesbian had sex with a guy
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it would not be with this guy.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He's always like licking his teeth and shit.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But luckily there's not just lesbian cringe,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This ain't fucking lesbian talk circle time!
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's also plenty of heterosexual cringe.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,God bless you penis.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And gay cringe.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not gay!
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Despite this movie literally being about mobsters,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,nothing mobster-related really happens in this movie until the last 30 minutes
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,where for some reason Al Pacino is here.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You piece of shit!
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm sure this is Al Pacino's favorite role of all time
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,right up there next to Jack and Jill.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ok, come on, low bat it here pitcher, we got em.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ho!
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ho!
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But to give it to you straight,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the movie ends with Gigli leaving the mentally disabled kid
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,on a random beach with the cast of Baywatch.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And it's literally played out like it's supposed to be this inspirational thing.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Like a tearjerker or something.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(inspirational music)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Meanwhile, Gigli and Ricki ride off into the sunset
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just as she's telling him that he should wear some makeup.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You know I bet you'd look awesome in some mascara.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Do not watch this movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You will get a UTI.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Or that other thing.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Evasive] Ok first of all this movie is Catwoman in name only.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Despite being a DC comics movie,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the Catwoman of this movie has pretty much nothing to do with the Catwoman from Batman.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This character has a different name
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,lives in a different city
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and gets her cat superpowers from a magic cat burping in her mouth.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's just so stupid, it's actually really fun to watch.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Especially the CGI Halle Berry during the action scenes
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's so funny.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,As you might expect this movie bombed hard
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,probably because they put it out around the same time as Spiderman 2.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughing)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughing)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a pretty infamous superhero movie now
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the director Pitof was basically laughed out of Hollywood
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and never directed a movie again.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But Halle Berry embraced this movie was a flop
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and she even showed up in person to accept her Razzie award.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,First of all I wanna thank Warner Bros.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(crowd laughing)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thank you for putting me in a piece of shit god-awful movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(crowd laughing, cheering)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Berry cheering)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Dirty love is a…
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"comedy",
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,created by Melissa McCarthy's cousin,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,notorious anti-vaxxer and Masked Singer judge, Jennifer McCarthy.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She stars as a woman who gets dumped by her boyfriend and her life falls apart.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's really unhinged but not in a funny kind of way.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,More in a "I'm born uncomfortable and I wanna leave the room," kind of way.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I actually had a hard time finding clips of this movie online
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because it's pretty obscure and nobody likes it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's mostly badly delivered jokes and gross out humor
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with a feminine spin.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And by feminine spin
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I, of course, mean period jokes
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Like this scene where a bleeding Jenny McCarthy
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,goes to a grocery store in white skirt and no underwear
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and almost bleeds out on the floor.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You know, relatable comedy for women.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Just girly things.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hashtag just girly things.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Just girly things.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a girly thing so you wouldn't understand, boys.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a girly thing.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hashtag just girly things.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a girly thing, it's a girly thing.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(sing-song) Hashtag just girly things.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So this a sequel to Basic Instinct
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,an erotic murder mystery thriller from the early 90s
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that's maybe best remembered today for this scene
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,where Newman from Seinfeld sees Sharon Stone's
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,bare, uncensored (censor beep)-ssy in an interrogation room.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The original was nominated for a few Razzies in its day
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but it was a massive box office hit
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and is today remembered as a pretty solid neo-noir thriller.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now, Basic Instinct 2 on the other hand only exists
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because Sharon Stone was promised 14 million dollars to star in the movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When the producers tried to cancel it,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,she sued them to force them to make it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Don't take it so hard.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Even Oedipus didn't see his mother coming.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Evasive] It's kind of hard to talk about this movie without spoiling a bit of the original.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I will say that overall I didn't hate this movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I also barely remember anything about the plot
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I only saw it a couple of months ago.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It rehashes a lot of the same story beats and plot points as the original,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just not as good.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Would I call it a terrible movie?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No, not really.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But compared to the original,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's pretty bland and forgettable.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But that's what happens when your only reason for making a movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is to avoid a massive lawsuit.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Gotta love showbiz, baby.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I Know Who Killed Me is a horror movie starring Lindsay Lohan
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as a girl who is killed by a serial killer
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but survives and wakes up in the hospital saying she's someone else.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This movie was released in July 27, 2007
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,right at the peak of the tabloid frenzy about Lindsay Lohan
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and her struggles with alcohol and drug addiction
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there was a lot of attention on the movie while it was filming.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Especially because Lohan checked into rehab the first time
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a month into the production.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The film set was swarmed with so much paparazzi
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that some of them even showed up in the background of a few shots in the movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Then a couple months after filming wrapped,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Lohan was arrested for drunk driving.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Then on July 24th, just three days before the movie was released,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Lohan was arrested for drunk driving again
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and couldn't even attend the premiere.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,All of this negative media attention made Lindsay Lohan enemy number one in Hollywood.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Critics eviscerated this movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But in a year since its release,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this film has kind of become a cult classic among horror movie fans.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's been screened in theaters many times over the last decade.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I've seen a lot of people online compare it to giallo movies,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,an Italian film genre popular in the 60s and 70s
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that mixed elements of murder movies, slashers, and erotica.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The influence of giallo is definitely present here.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a stylish weird thriller
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and Lohan's background made her kind of perfect for the role
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as the main character quickly transforms from a sweet high school girl
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,into a deeply traumatized young woman with a robotic hand.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's definitely not for everyone, myself included,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but if you're into weird gory horror movies,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there's a lot to vibe with here.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a much better movie than Norbit, that's for sure.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Have you ever seen Norbit?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ooh! Ah! Bitches!
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(screaming)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(screaming)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Love Guru is a movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,written by, directed by, and starring Mike Meyers
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that's mostly remembered as the movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that completely tanked his career
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and caused him to step away from Hollywood for 8 years.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Critics and audiences both hated it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,With critics calling it
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,lazy, immature, mindless, pitiable, insulting, painful, gross, contemptuous, racist, and unlikable,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,among many other things.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But don't take their word for it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Take my word for it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't have any other words for it,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that pretty much sums it up.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Here's a scene they use in the trailer.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Woah! How did you get there?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(groans)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This little guy scared the crap out of me.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Think I might have to do a panty check,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I might have some monkey mustard back there.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Who is this prick?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Shh.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Man, how do you do? Shrimp?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What did you call me, jagomoe?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm sorry I didn't catch your gnome—name!
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You are a midget.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Evasive] The plot of this movie is Mike Myers
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,plays a self-help guru named Maurice Pitka
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who was raised in India
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,wears a chastity belt
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and dreams of being on Oprah.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He's hired by the Toronto Maple Leaves
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to help their star player get back together with his wife
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because he is the Love Guru
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and only he can save their marriage.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's basically a one note movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that feels like it was written by a 10 year old boy.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Every seen goes on for way too long,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Mike Myers keeps laughing at his own jokes
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and pretty much every line is about
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,poop, pee, farts, balls, or dicks,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with many of the characters' names being dick jokes.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We got Tugginmypudha,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,coach Cherkov,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Le Coq,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Dick Pants,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Evasive laughing)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's not funny that John Oliver is named Dick Pants.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughing)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Evasive] It's not… (laughing)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Evasive] Ok, I'll be the first to say that
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't think any of the Transformers movies are particularly good.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That being said,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen is definitely the worst one,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,if only for how offensive and annoying it is.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Pretty much every Transformer introduced in this movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,either talks with a racist accent,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or the most annoying cartoon voice imaginable.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And when it isn't being annoying or racist,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's doing shit like this.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Name's Wheelie. Hah…hah…
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Say my name, say my name. Hah…hah…
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What are you allowing\Nto happen to your foot just now?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,At least he's faithful, Sam.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, well, he's faithful,\Nand he's nude and he's perverted.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hah…hah…hah…
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(sighs)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Like is it any wonder Megan Fox quit the series after this?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Sadly this movie ended up making 836 million dollars
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which was about a hundred million more dollars than Up made that same year.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This thing's gonna give me a heart attack, I swear.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- That's 'cause you was a wuss.\N- You did force me into that car, right?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh I think he scared.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hey Mudflap. What we gonna do with this shrimp taco?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Lemme just pop a cap in his ass, throw him in the truck,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then nobody gonna know nothing, y'know what I mean?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- No one's gonna pop any caps in any asses. Ok?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- I've had a hell of a day.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Why don't you get a haircut with your bitch ass?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What can I even say about this movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that hasn't been said a thousand times already?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This live action trashfire directed by M. Night Shyamalan
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,attempted to condense the first season of an amazing animated TV show
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,into a 90 minute CGI-filled mess.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Maybe if you watch this,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,having never seen the original series,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's just another lame Hollywood fantasy action movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But for fans of the series, this was offensively bad.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The creators of the show were not allowed to give any input on the movie's development.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Beloved characters were made one-dimensional and pointless,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,major plot points were skipped over,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,characters' names are pronounced wrong.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How do you even screw that up?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This movie made a lot of money
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but was so hated by audiences
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that Paramount must have known that they couldn't fool people twice
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and cancelled plans to adapt the other 2 seasons,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,effectively sinking the career of the kid who played Aang before it even began.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's just sad.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The whole movie is a sad waste of source material.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You'd probably have a better time playing the official Wii game
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,than watching this movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(vaguely Asian music)\N(wheels skidding)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Evasive] Ok, maybe not.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(dramatic, haunting piano)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Alright, Razzies, respectfully,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,what the fuck?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I wouldn't call myself a Twilight fan,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I never read the books and I didn't watch the movies until recently,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but even I know that the last movie in the Twilight series
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,isn't that bad a movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's ridiculous, sure, but out of all the movies in this series,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's definitely the most interesting and most exciting entry aside from the first one.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Obviously they gave it Worst Picture as a sort of dig at the entire series,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,since none of the others had won Worst Picture before,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but come on.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Breaking Dawn Part 2 is fun.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's got a big fight scene on a frozen lake,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's got a girl named Renesmee,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it concludes one of the most iconic and most stupid blockbuster series of all time.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's so entertaining and over the top
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that even if you hate Twilight and everything about it,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you can't tell me that this movie is worse than the Adam Sandler movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,where he shows a 13 year old impregnating his teacher.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You can't tell me that.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because you'd be wrong.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Let me start this one off by
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,showing you the list of people that were involved in this movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And that's not even all of them.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Movie 43 is a compilation of raunchy comedy sketches
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,each directed by different people.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Made on an impossibly cheap budget of 6 million dollars,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this thing took 3 whole years to film
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because the producers worked around actors' schedules
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to maximize how many famous people could show up on this.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The sketches themselves are a relentless onslaught of dirty shock humor.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's one where Hugh Jackman has balls on his face.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's one where Chloe Grace Moretz spills period blood on the wall.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's one where a horny cat pisses on Elizabeth Banks.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's one where Kieran Culkin wants to leave a hickey on Emma Stone's vagina.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My personal favorite was the one where Anna Faris asks Chris Pratt
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to poop on her during sex.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- So he takes some—\N- Poop Viagra.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then gets hit by car.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I love you, I wanna marry you.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh my god. Doug, no!
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you're feeling sadistic,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,throw this on, on your next bad movie night with friends.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's got a little something for everyone.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't even know what the hell Movie 43 means.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I'm in Movie 43, maybe I'm in Movie 44.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't know.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So if you're unfamiliar, Kirk Cameron was a child actor in the 80s
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who took a hard right turn into Evangelical Christianity
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and has since appeared almost exclusively
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in low-budget Christian movies and radio programs.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Today, he's mostly known for his inflammatory publicity stunts
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Like in 2020, when he organized maskless Christmas carols in LA
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to protest COVID restrictions,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which he called "communism disguised as public health".
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You know the type.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He's a nutcase,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and his movie had been dunked a hundred times before by YouTubers already
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because for a while, this was the lowest-rated movie on IMDB,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with an average rating of 1.3 out of 10.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Which he claimed was the result of an atheist conspiracy on Reddit.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The whole movie takes place in one house
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and almost every scene is him using weird circular reasoning
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to explain how non-Christian Christmas traditions
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,had actually been Christian all along.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Like how Christmas trees were God's idea
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because God created trees.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Or how the holiday isn't actually materialistic
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because the ability to buy gifts
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is God's gift to humanity.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's just boring.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's just a boring movie where nothing happens
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and everyone is just sitting or standing around
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,not doing anything.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The only remotely entertaining part of the whole movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is when all the extras have an epic dance party at the end.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,♫ (Angels we have heard on high, trap remix style) ♫
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Fant-four-stic is a classic case of too many people having their hands in the same movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The writers disagreed on everything.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The director Josh Trank slept with a loaded gun on him
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because he got death threats for casting Michael B. Jordan.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Fox executives had whole scenes cut out
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and other scenes reshot without Trank's approval
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because they thought his version was too dark.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Trank also put out a tweet before the movie came out
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,basically disowning it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The end result of all of this
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was an ugly, boring mess of a movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,where there's no real stakes or tension anywhere.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They don't even have them become superheroes
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,until halfway thru the movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and most of the time they're just standing around
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,talking and not doing anything.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You can see the remnants of a decent movie in here
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like in this scene where Miles Teller wakes up on a hospital bed looking like Lanky Kong.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But we'll never know what the movie was supposed to be
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because nobody cares.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's no one out there saying
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,hashtag release the trank cut.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want them to go see just a really great movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Something that is different from…uh…
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Dr. Doom is one of the top 5 greatest characters
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that ever come off a comic book—panel.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Science is really cool and this is something that…hopefully…
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So 2015 was another tie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with Fifty Shades of Grey also being awarded Worst Picture.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is another movie where I"m like,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,what can I possibly say about this that hasn't been said already?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's based on an erotic novel that started out as a Twilight Fanfiction,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the stars have no chemistry
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and nothing about their relationship is believable.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The movie spawned that Love Me Like You Do song
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that's haunted retail workers for almost a decade now.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's just a bad movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's boring and bad and it made over 500 million dollars
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so rather than repeat the same things that a 100 other YouTubers have said
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'll just leave you with a little mental image.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,See, this movie came out on Valentine's Day 2015.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want you to visualize Kayllynn and Greg
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,from Sugar Land, Texas
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who went to see this at the local AMC on Valentine's Day.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want you to visualize Kayllynn giving Greg a dry handjob
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,at the back of the theater, 40 minutes into the movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want you to visualize them going to Applebees after
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and eating a slightly burned chicken breast
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and some unseasoned broccoli.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want you to visualize—
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you don't know already,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Dinesh D'Souza is a far-right political commentator
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who's been releasing propaganda films every year since 2012.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He also pleaded guilty to campaign finance fraud in 2014
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and was sentenced to 5 years probation.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,During which, he made Hillary's America: The Secret History of the Democratic Party.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Released in the summer of 2016,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hillary's America is a movie that claims it's a documentary
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but aside from a few news clips and some scripted-sounding interviews,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,much of the movie is either historical reenactments
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or D'Souza talking to terrible actors
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and trying to pass it off as documentary footage.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The movie opens with D'Souza being sentenced for fraud
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which he claims was a Democratic conspiracy to shut him up
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and from there he goes to prison
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and starts interviewing other prisoners about how gangs work
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You know, gangs are\Nall about stealing, man.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What's the biggest gang?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Right in your face.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Politicians, man.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- How does a gang make money?\N- Any way they can, you know?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Trafficking, smuggling,\Nstealing, extortion,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, but how do they pull it off?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Later on, he visits the Democratic National Headquarters
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and it's all done up to look like a high-tech museum
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for the glory of the Democratic Party.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Then he sneaks into the restricted part of the building
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and breaks into the secret archives
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to reveal the secret information
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that is literally in the curriculum of 8th Grade US History.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Like, "Hey guys, did you know that most of the slaveowners in the Civil War were Democrats?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Wow, isn't that crazy? How come no one's talking about this?"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The sad truth is this movie sold 13 million dollars worth of tickets when it came out.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Which means that hundreds of thousands of very gullible Americans saw this in theaters.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And many probably dragged their impressionable kids to see it with them
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when all those kids wanted to do was play the new Pokémon Go game that just came out.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's depressing to think about.