[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:00.00,0:00:02.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What's up cinephiles,\NI'm Evasive,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:02.38,0:00:05.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and this piece of paper right here\Nmeans two things:
Dialogue: 0,0:00:05.77,0:00:08.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Number one, I am tens of\Nthousands of
Dialogue: 0,0:00:08.51,0:00:09.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,dollars in debt,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:09.82,0:00:13.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and number two, I know a lot\Nabout movies.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:13.27,0:00:14.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And since it looks like the U.S\Ngovernment
Dialogue: 0,0:00:14.56,0:00:16.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is not going to be giving me any\Ndebt relief this year,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:16.91,0:00:19.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I have no choice now but to\Ntorture myself on the Internet
Dialogue: 0,0:00:19.67,0:00:21.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for money to pay off the loans
Dialogue: 0,0:00:21.65,0:00:23.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I took out to go to film school.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:23.16,0:00:24.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(eEeEewWwWw!)
Dialogue: 0,0:00:24.01,0:00:26.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So for this video, I watched every\Nmovie that's ever won
Dialogue: 0,0:00:26.57,0:00:29.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a Razzie Award for Worst Picture\Nof the Year.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:29.01,0:00:31.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This was an extremely painful\Nexperience
Dialogue: 0,0:00:31.20,0:00:33.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I regretted my decision\Nimmediately,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:33.26,0:00:35.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but for the sake of my adoring\Nfans
Dialogue: 0,0:00:35.37,0:00:36.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and my bank account,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:36.41,0:00:38.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I went ahead and watched all 46\Nof these
Dialogue: 0,0:00:38.55,0:00:40.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,movies so I could explain them to\Nyou.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:40.36,0:00:43.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But after the grueling experience\Nof watching all these movies,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:43.03,0:00:45.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not about to tackle this\Nbreakdown alone.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:45.25,0:00:46.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I went ahead and roped in\Nanother video
Dialogue: 0,0:00:46.95,0:00:49.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,essay girly and a talking trash can
Dialogue: 0,0:00:49.03,0:00:51.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to help explain some of these\Nmovies for me.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:53.29,0:00:56.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But before I get to the movies, let\Nme explain what the Razzies are.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:59.81,0:01:02.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Golden Raspberry Awards are\Nan annual event,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:02.47,0:01:04.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,usually held the night before the Oscars,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:04.58,0:01:06.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to give out awards for the worst\Nmovies of the year.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:06.96,0:01:09.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was founded by Hollywood\Ncopywriter
Dialogue: 0,0:01:09.06,0:01:11.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,John Wilson and editor Maureen\NMurphy.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:11.39,0:01:12.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The idea for the Razzies came\Nabout
Dialogue: 0,0:01:12.90,0:01:14.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in 1980 when Wilson saw
Dialogue: 0,0:01:14.70,0:01:16.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Can't Stop the Music and Xanadu
Dialogue: 0,0:01:16.90,0:01:18.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,back to back and hated them both
Dialogue: 0,0:01:18.81,0:01:20.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so much he thought there ought
Dialogue: 0,0:01:20.08,0:01:21.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to be an award show for this type\Nof thing.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:21.96,0:01:23.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Months later, Wilson hosted an
Dialogue: 0,0:01:23.46,0:01:25.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oscars watch party at his house,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:25.36,0:01:27.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and after the Oscars had finished,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:27.41,0:01:29.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he and Murphy passed out ballots\Nto everyone at the party to vote
Dialogue: 0,0:01:29.96,0:01:31.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,on the worst movies of the year,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:31.58,0:01:33.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then he announced the\Nwinners in his living room.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:33.89,0:01:36.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Over time, the ceremony grew and\Ngrew,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:36.01,0:01:37.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and today they're considered a\Nstaple
Dialogue: 0,0:01:37.49,0:01:39.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of the Hollywood award season
Dialogue: 0,0:01:39.13,0:01:41.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as a low-budget Bizarro World\NOscars
Dialogue: 0,0:01:41.38,0:01:43.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that distributes awards in\Ncategories
Dialogue: 0,0:01:43.35,0:01:45.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,such as Worst Actor, Worst\NDirector,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:45.52,0:01:46.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and Worst Screenplay.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:46.95,0:01:49.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Unlike the qualifications for voting\Nat the Oscars, though,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:49.63,0:01:51.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,becoming a Razzie voter is very\Neasy:
Dialogue: 0,0:01:51.83,0:01:53.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,either be friends with one of the\Nproducers
Dialogue: 0,0:01:53.92,0:01:56.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or just pay a $40 membership fee.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:56.36,0:01:58.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's all it takes.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:58.10,0:01:59.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So that's the story of the Razzies.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:59.78,0:02:01.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now, are you ready to learn about\Nevery single movie
Dialogue: 0,0:02:01.86,0:02:03.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that won Worst Picture?
Dialogue: 0,0:02:04.84,0:02:05.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because I wasn't.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:05.80,0:02:08.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's 46 of these things, so I'm\Ngoing to talk about each one
Dialogue: 0,0:02:08.80,0:02:10.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just a minute or two
Dialogue: 0,0:02:10.05,0:02:11.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and hand off a few to my guests
Dialogue: 0,0:02:11.54,0:02:13.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so I don't completely lose my mind here.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:13.66,0:02:16.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Also, I put a content warning on a\Nbunch of these movies
Dialogue: 0,0:02:16.19,0:02:18.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because of the sensitive subject\Nmatter I discuss.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:18.60,0:02:22.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not trying to traumatize anybody\Nbut myself in this video...
Dialogue: 0,0:02:22.69,0:02:24.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,well, me and my guests.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:25.11,0:02:27.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I commissioned them for this,\Nso i-- it's fine.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Anybody who can swallow\Ntwo snowballs and a ding-dong
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,shouldn't have any trouble with pride.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Evasive] The first movie to win\NWorst Picture was "Can't Stop The Music".
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,A movie about the "origins"\Nof the disco group "Village People".
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I say origins in air-quotes because\Nthe Village People play themselves
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the plot is completely made-up
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and not at all how \Nthe Village People actually formed
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The movie itself is super campy\Nand full of these crazy musical numbers
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that are unironically kinda great.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's just too bad that in between\Nthose musical numbers are these scenes
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with really terrible acting \Nthat go on for way too long.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Wait a minute! I am not taking one\Nmore step 'til I know where I'm going."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Yeah, quit my job, and you\Ngot me walking the beat again!"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- "And I'm not even getting paid for it!"\N- "Hey, hold your horses."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I told ya I had a surprise for ya."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I hope so. I turned in my\Ncoin change with the toll booth."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Evasive] By 1980 the disco fad was \Nalmost over and
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,people loved to hate on\Ndisco music at the time
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so you can see why this\Nended up being such a huge bomb.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Also, shockingly, this movie marks the\Nfirst film appearance of Caitlyn Jenner
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and apparently the experience was so bad
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,she didn't appear in a movie again until\N"Jack & Jill 2011".
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And, uh, well.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Mommie Dearest is a "biopic"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,about the life of actress Joan Crawford's\Nadopted daughter Christina.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Again, I say biopic in air-quotes\Nbecause the movie was based on
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Christina Crawford's controversial memoir
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that other members of Joan Crawford's\Nfamily disavowed when it came out.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I haven't done much research on the topic
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so I'm in no position\Nto question this story.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I will say that after\Nthe movie was made
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Christina said the film was grotesque\Nand not true to her memoir.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Released just 4 years after\NJoan Crawford passed away,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this movie basically spits all over\Nher fresh grave
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and portrays her as a horrible mother
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who frequently, physically and emotionally\Nabused her daughter.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Whether or not this is actually true\Nis still a matter of debate.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Regardless of the real-life circumstances\Nbehind the movie,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Faye Dunway's performance\Nof Joan Crawford is iconic now.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,People who have unfortunately\Nexperienced emotional abuse from a parent
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,found her performance\Nscarily true to their own life experiences
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but general audiences thought\Nshe was just being outrageously campy
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and over the top the whole movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because of its reputation, the movie\Nbecame a queer cult classic over the years
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,especially in the drag community.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was even featured in the most\Nrecent season of RuPaul's Drag Race.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"No wire hangers!"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,♫ No more wire hangers ♫\N♫ Ah, ah! ♫
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,♫ No, no, wire hangers ♫\N♫ No, no, no, no ♫
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Evasive] Inchon is a movie about\Nthe battle of Incheon in the Korean War.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was financed and produced\Nby the Unification Church,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a movement that was and still is\Nconsidered a dangerous cult
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with a leader who called himself\Nthe second coming of Jesus Christ.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The film's producer was\Na very wealthy member of the church.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He said he was instructed by God\Nto make the film.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, unsurprisingly, no investors wanted\Nany part of this.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,All 46 million dollars of the budget was\Nprovided by the church and its followers.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The film itself doesn't have much\Nto do with the Unification Church.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a straightforward war movie that's\Njust boring and unremarkable.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It had some star power but only because\Nthe actors in it were paid a lot of money.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,With Laurence Olivier even admitting\Nbefore the movie was released
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that he was only in it for the money.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was such a flop that no one\Neven bothered to release it on home media.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The only available version\Nof the movie today
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was from an old VHS rip from when it\Nplayed on Unification Church TV channel.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The only thing worth seeing in this movie\Nwas Laurence Olivier's makeup job.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean he looks like the Joker.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This movie is just tasteless.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's based on a novel by Harold Robbins
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who was paid 600 000 dollars\Nfor the film rights
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and apparently fell asleep\Nin the screening room
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and never actually watched the movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,First of all, in the first 15 minutes,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,young Ray Liotta,\Nin his first ever movie role,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,sexually assaults the main character\Nwith a garden hose.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,After that the rest of the movie\Nis just her being forced to have sex
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with gross older men\Nin order to get ahead in Hollywood.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And you see all of it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It seems like it was trying to criticize\Nsexism in Hollywood
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but instead of handling it\Nwith any kind of nuance or respect,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the movie fully shows the sex scenes
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and does the very thing\Nit's trying to critique.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The final scene of the movie shows\Nher winning an Oscar for Best Screenplay
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and calling out the men\Nwho took advantage of her
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in her acceptance speech.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Then she's booed off stage, and leaves,\Nand the movie just ends there.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's really uncomfortable to watch.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But somehow the next movie is even worse.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ugh, god, ok.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Bolero is a movie by John Derek.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,John Derek is—\N(groan)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,John Derek was an old Hollywood actor
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who appeared in supporting roles in\Nseveral big movies in the 1940s and 50s.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In 1973 when Derek was 47 years old,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he traveled to Europe to direct\Na low-budget movie called
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Once upon a Love" starring\Na 16 year old girl named
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Mary Cathleen Collins".
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,During the production—\N(retching)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm sorry.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,During the production, \NJohn Derek left his wife
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and groomed Mary Collins\Ninto a sexual relationship,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,With the two staying in Europe\Nuntil she turned 18
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so he could avoid \Nstatutory (censor beep) charges.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When they got married a few years later,\Nshe changed her name to Bo Derek
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and proceeded to star in all of his movies\Nuntil he died in 1998.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(retching)\N(vomit squelching)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm sorry.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So anyway, Bolero was a movie\Nabout a young woman fresh from college
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who travels to Morocco in Spain\Nto lose her virginity.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If that wasn't bad enough,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this movie features a full-frontal\Nnudity scene with a 14 year old girl.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not an actress playing a 14 year old girl.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,An actual 14 year old girl.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(retching, vomit squelching)\N(coughing)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you've never seen any\NRambo movies before
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the image you probably associate\Nwith the word "Rambo"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is the one where\Nhypermasculine Sylvester Stallone
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is firing a machine gun\Nwithout a shirt on.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But see, that's actually from this movie,\N"Rambo First Blood: Part II",
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which has very little to do\Nwith Part 1 at all.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The whole point of\Nthe first Rambo movie was that
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Rambo was a Vietnam War veteran\Nwith severe PTSD
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who snaps and kills a bunch of\Nsmall-time cops who treat him like shit.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This sequel, on the other hand
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,throws that tragic anti-war character\Nout the window
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as the US government sends him\Nback to Vietnam
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to locate prisoners of war
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and Rambo is weirdly ok with that.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's like he immediately got over his PTSD
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and just got straight to blowing stuff up,\Nno problem.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This movie was\Na massive box office success
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and made double of what\Nthe first movie made,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so naturally, Rambo III also ditched\Nthe anti-war angle
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and sent Rambo to Afghanistan.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I dunno if someone thought\Nthe first movie was amazing,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it really sucks to see how quickly\Nthey ruined this character.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But, like, I get it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The people who went to see\Nthese sequels in theaters
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,didn't watch it for the plot.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They watched to see \NSylvester Stallone do this.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(bow twang)\N(explosion)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In the early 80s, Prince was a rising star.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And his stardom was cemented in 1984
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with the massive hit that was Purple Rain.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,After the success of Purple Rain,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Warner Brothers told Prince he was basically allowed to do anything he wanted for his next project,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,greenlighting Under the Cherry Moon without even reading the script
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the story is, Prince plays a guy in the French Rivier named Christopher
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He and his friend Tricky try to scam a rich girl out of her inheritance
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but they both end up falling in love with her.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Problem with the movie became apparent early on
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when Prince hired someone with no experience to write the script.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Then 16 days into filming, the director quit.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And Prince took over even though he had no experience directing a movie before.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The end result was a movie that features what I can only describe as
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Acting.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Don't try anything funny.\NNot this time, Christopher."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I want the money or I throw you both out onto the street."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(gasp)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"That's right, [inaudible]"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Throw me onto the street?"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's bizarre, it's one of those movies where the acting is so bad it loops around to being funny
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which has given the movie a bit of a cult following over the years
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that and the soundtrack is amazing
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like with Purple Rain Prince released an album with the movie that went Platinum
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and is today remembered as one of the most iconic movies of his career
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,After Under the Cherry Moon failed, Prince tried one more time to direct a feature-length movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but that one got nominated for a bunch of Razzies too
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and after that he gave up and never tried to direct a movie again.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Also this here marks the first ever tie in Razzies history with Under the Cherry Moon tieing with
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughing)\NHoward the Duck.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughing)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Greetings, Evasive viewers, it is I, young Junko, expert in Bird Law
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I'm here to defend my client Howard T. Duck,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,star of the Razzies' Worst Film of 1986, Howard The Duck
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,For nearly the last 40 years my client's reputation has been tarnished and slandered against
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,by quack punch, chicken shit critics for this tragic box office bomb.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Central character, the Duck, the one that we're gonna be rooting for,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he's neither funny, or bit of funny."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I'm here to clear the air.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Howard the Duck is not a movie, no, it's a documentary.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I know this because I was there.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We all were.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My entire clan witnessed my client crash land on Earth
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to star in a motion picture that of which has been
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's still awful. It's bad. We're not winning this case, buddy.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I wasn't trying anything. Honest!"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is a strange movie to say the least.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Howard the Duck notoriously opens with 2 instances of
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,full frontal duck booba in the span of 30 seconds.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But the rest of the movie is this whiplash
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,between what's a squeaky clean full house type family movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that no one older than the age of 3 years old would find funny
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,followed by things like Marty McFly's mom showing off her ass and
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,pulling off a condom for Howard's corkscrew.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Howard…"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's like anti-matter Shrek where they didn't know how to mix adult humor and the kids' [inaudible] properly yet
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so [inaudible] becomes this overly long bland comedy
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with hardly any intentional laughs
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that just happens to throw in something totally obscene every now and then
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- [Howard] Oh!\N- I just can't resist your
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,intense animal magnetism.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's a lot of attempts at duck puns, most are just replacing a random phrase in a word with "duck"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"That's it. No more Mr. Nice Duck."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Even the director's name is Willard Hyuck.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's a duck name. That's a name you give a duck.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The first half of the movie has Howard pointlessly meandering
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there's no funny interactions or observations or memorable bits
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's just an aimless movie with the guy in the duck suit.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You have an entire portion of the movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,where Howard has a job as a towel boy in a sex club
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's fun for the whole family!
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, Breeders, what the hell.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Bareback bestiality and pedophilia.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh yeah, we find Howard getting a [inaudible] as a result of a [inaudible] incident.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Which also [inadubile] a Palpatine somehow returning from the dead and possessing the body of that one actor that's in every 80s movie who'd later be arrested for being a sex pervert.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Whaddya think you'd like to eat?"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I no longer need human food."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I need little boy butts.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You have a movie where a talking duck fires a giant laser
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,at a hell portal to stop a horde of alien warlords
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,from taking over the Earth
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and they still manage to make it a total snooze fest
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They try to give Howard a bit of edge
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but he still feels too kiddy and sanitized for what they're going for
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And part of that is his design.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He looks like a cross of a Furby and Mac Culkin.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There are some things I did like,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like these alien overlords are pretty cool
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,their design and their stop motion is really well done
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the sequence where Howard gets shot into space
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is pretty neat, pretty impressive to look at.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I like this sequence where Howard and [inaudible] get a [inaudible]
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and start flying away from the cops
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that was good.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, Tim Robins is in this
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Imagine having what's considered one of the best movies of all time as part of your portfolio
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then on the other end of the spectrum having Howard the Duck,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,now that's range
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Genuinely I was taken aback because some of the shots in this movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,undeniably go hard.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I feel like there's a version of this movie that could've actualy been good with less work
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like if they leaned into Howard being this cynical wise-cracking duck
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that's down on his luck who gets thrust into Earth and finds this strange new realm
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,isn't so much different from his own
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,then it's all about the bills baby put it on my belt
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[inaudible] taking that as an opportunity for a fresh start,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,slowly climbing his way up the corporate ladder
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,until becoming a national celebrity that gets caught up in 80s consumerism and greed
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,then maybe having begrudgingly involved in some of the weird sci-fi stuff like the comics, i dunno
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not sure how to defend my client, give him the chair.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Howard screams)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Evasive laughing)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Alright, I may not be able to defend Howard,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but know this: from this day forth, I will ensure every client of mine
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is proven innocent.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now for my next client, I will be defending one Bill Cosby.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Bill Co-Bill Cosby.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm good. Your Honor? I would draw. We're done here. We're done.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's Leonard, part 6.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ask anyone who's seen this movie they'll tell you
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that's when they first knew lil' Bill was a real piece of shit
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When I heard there was a comedy movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that just started on part 6
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I thought, hey, maybe this movie could be bad in a good way, at the very least
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Nope, it's just bad, it's boring, it's so boring.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If there's one thing Cosby was always a master at
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's making people very sleepy.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The whole thing was supposed to be a spoof on the spy genre,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,sorta like Naked Gun, except they actually came out a year before that movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They really just had the cameras rolling and had Bill Cosby do whatever he wanted
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's a bunch of weird sex shit
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean the clues are all there,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in the movie his wife divorced him because he slept with a 19 year old
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and his daughter is dating a much older man to further her career as an actress
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so then Leonard has to see her flash her tits on stage
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for no reason, none of these scenes add anything to the movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think Cosby just wanted to look at some young girl tits
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The whole film has this lethargic and slow energy to it
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Everything from the dialogue to the editing,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's like watching a movie at 0.5 speed.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The movie opens with Leonard and an assassin having a little shootout in a kitchen
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The joke being that what they're doing is actually helping to prep some of the food
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ok, could be funny but the pace of it all is so bizarrely off by a step
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Every gag and bit is like this, like they took something that was
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,maybe a 3 out of 10 joke at best and spread it so thin that
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you ask yourself was there even a joke at all to begin with?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The plot follows Leonard being the best agent in the world
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who's long been retired after being pulled back for one last mission
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,after a buncha animals under mind control start killing people
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yet again a god-awful 80s comedy starts of with an animal looking at a porno mag
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Here's two fucking nickels
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The entire first half is him just stumbling around tryna get back with his ex wife
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who pours soup on him—what is this gag?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Is this a fetish, Mr. Cosby? You think this was genuinely funny?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[mocking] We'll have him pour soup.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Cosby doesn't have a single funny line or hook to his character
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you can tell he's put zero effort into any of this
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's like he said "Yeah I'll do the movie but I don't wanna look too stupid,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,don't make me look too stupid."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Most of these so-called jokes are what the most boring uptight person in the world would think being silly is.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[mocking] Oh, look, wow he's being a ballerina, so girly.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, wow, he's doing a silly fitness tape, how can he subject himself to that.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, wee, it's like he thinks these things are so beneath him
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that just him doing it would be funny.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What a piece of shit.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You know what really makes me mad, though?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's completely unfair. Because everyone seems to be trying, but him.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's a part where Leonard tries to free all the animals from captivity,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I just wanna recognize this bird right here.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Who in this 5 second shot, bends the bars of his cage with his beak and breaks free
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,God bless this bird.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This bird put more effort than Bill Cosby in his own movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This bird did not deserve to be in one of the worst movies of all time.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,None of these animals did.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This ostrich didn't deserve to be betrayed with a sex criminal grinding his pudding pop on its back.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If audiences in 1987 hated this, watching it now,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with all the humor naturally diluted even further to the passage of time
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is like drinking a 40 year old can of new coke
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and when Bill's the one handing you the drink
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's safe to say you probably shouldn't drink it
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(gurgling)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Cocktail is a movie where young Tom Cruise plays a bartender in Manhattan
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,then he movies to Jamaica and falls in love with a girl
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but then he loses her and moves back to New York to win her back
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and that's pretty much it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What you see is what you get with this one.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a really mediocre movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not that good, but not that bad either.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well except for this scene where Tom Cruise stands on a bar
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and reads his shitty poetry.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is pretty cringey.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I see America drinking the fabulous cocktails I make."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"America's getting stinking on something I stir or shake."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughing)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I make drinks so sweet and snazz-ay iced tea the kamikaze,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(hollering)\Nthe sex on the beach is Schnapps made from peach
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the ball and hammer the Alabama slammer."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Unsurprisingly with Tom Cruise starring, this movie was a massive success,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,earning a ridiculous 171 million dollars on a 20 million dollar budget.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's also the movie the Beach Boys "Kokomo" song was written for.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Besides that, not much to talk about here.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm pretty sure it only won Worst Picture because this was the year Rain Man was favored to win Best Picture
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the voters probably thought it was funny to make both the Best and Worst Picture be Tom Cruise movies.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ok before making this video, I haven't actually watched any Star Trek at all.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But because I'm committed to my craft, I went ahead and watched all 6 original movies
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just so I can understand why this one is considered the worst.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,After all that, I—yeah. I get it now.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's not a horrible movie but especially compared to the previous ones in the series,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Star Trek V is pretty bad.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Pretty much everything went wrong behind the scenes.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,William Shatner directed it with no prior directing experience
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,nobody could agree on anything during the writing process,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there was a writers' strike
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,then a Teamsters strike
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They shot a lot of the movie in the Mojave Desert
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which is just as miserable as it sounds.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And after the filming was done, they only had 3 months to make the special effects,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and all the best special effects technicians in Hollywood were busy making
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Indiana Jones 3 and Ghostbusters II at the time.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Do I think this movie deserved Worst Picture?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It does some wacky things like introduce Spock's long-lost brother that he never mentioned before
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or show Kirk getting mauled by a cat woman.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But overall I really don't think it's that bad.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But to be honest, I'm not a Trekkie who had to see
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Captain Kirk show up on the Enterprise in a "Go climb a rock t-shirt"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,…So…I mean…is that bad?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I actually don't know.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Can someone in the comments tell me if that's bad, if that's out of character?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I actually don't know if I'm supposed to be mad at this or not.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Adventures of Ford Fairlane was a "comedy" starring Andrew Dice Clay.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you don't know who Andrew Dice Clay is, he was a comedian most active in the late 80s and early 90s
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who was known as the Dice Man,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which was basically a cover for him to tell the most offensive jokes he possibly could.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"And they're always on parade."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"They march down the street with t-shirts and flags saying
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'I want money for AIDS disease.' Beautiful.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want money for a fucking car, I ain't marching up and down the street
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Get a job, butt slammer."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Evasive] The movie itself is about a detective, I guess,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I dunno, it's just not funny at all.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Honestly I was on my phone the whole time because I was just so bored.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- "I got something serious to discuss."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Yeah, what is it, premature ejaculation?"\N(laughing)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Like that time we were at our parents' wedding anniversary,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I told that joke, 'What's the definition of vagina?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The box that peanuts come in!'" (laugh)
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Gilbert Godfrey plays the only funny character in the movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but he dies like 25 minutes in and the rest is just a boring mess to follow.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The director Renny Harlin was also working on Die Hard 2 at the time
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which ended up in theaters at the exact same time as Ford Fairlane
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and when you look at the money comparison between the two movies
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,yeah, it's pretty obvious which movie he cared about more.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Clint Eastwood. I fucked him. Oh!"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Evasive] 1990 was another tie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with Ford Fairlane tieing with another movie from unapologetic (censor beep) phile John Derek.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In this one, Bo Derek plays a woman married to a much older man
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and when the older man dies, his ghost takes up residence in her head
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and goads her into murdering another man
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so he can possess his body and have sex with her again.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a supernatural dirty old man movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,where John Derek fantasizes about living rent-free in Bo Derek's head after he dies.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Plus this ended up being his last movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It would be poetic if it wasn't so disgusting.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Bo was very very young. Linda was very young…
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I guess I just meet them young,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,before they're wise enough to know I'm not the guy."
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Anyway the acting was bad, the story was bad,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the visuals are bad,
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but the real cherry on top here was this movie
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was the first film appearance of Donald Trump.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No joke, Trump's first movie was made by a (censor beep) phile.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He even does a little duck face in it, look at him.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Poetic.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Just watch this clip.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Woah!"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Happy (inaudible)"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Oh no! How's my driving? 1800-I'm gonna-(censor beep)-die!"
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Evasive] Bruce Willis plays a master burglar fresh out of prison who
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was blackmailed into stealing some art
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but it turns out it's all part of a conspiracy to build a secret machine
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,invented by Leonardo Da Vinci that can turn lead into gold.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,At this point in his career, Bruce Willis was mainly known for Die Hard I and II.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And was looking to branch out a bit with Hudson Hawk.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But apparently he couldn't decide what he wanted the movie to be.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In an interview, one of the writers later said:
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I started to know we were in trouble when Joel and Bruce would say during filming
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You know what this is? This is a Pink Panther movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The next day they'd say
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You know what this is? This is an American James Bond movie.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Then it would be: You