[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:00.00,0:00:30.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Subtitles by MemoryOnSmells\Nhttp://UKsubtitles.ru.\NResynced by Oldskool for www.addic7ed.com
Dialogue: 0,0:00:30.28,0:00:33.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Who owns the Infinity Gauntlet?\NThanos.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:33.12,0:00:37.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What was Thor's father's name? Odin.\NSorry, Moss, I've really got to go.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:38.32,0:00:41.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Awww, just a few more,\Njust a few more...
Dialogue: 0,0:00:41.04,0:00:43.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No, no, I'm sorry, you've done\Nmore than enough.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:43.44,0:00:47.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,OK, all right, baby, see you later.\NBye-bye. Wow! Right?
Dialogue: 0,0:00:48.28,0:00:51.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's an impressive knowledge\Nof the Marvel universe. I know.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:51.96,0:00:53.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, you've done it.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:53.28,0:00:56.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You've finally found a woman\NI can do business with.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:56.60,0:00:59.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, no, don't say\Nthings like that.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:59.64,0:01:03.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm sorry, I'm just\Nso excited for us. No...
Dialogue: 0,0:01:07.60,0:01:11.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you don't go in all the way,\Nit doesn't really count.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:14.00,0:01:18.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hey, red! Stand back, stand back,\Nthis one's mine.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:18.08,0:01:20.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm going to do everything for you,\Nreally nice.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:20.44,0:01:24.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Stand back, stand back,\Nshe's all mine.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:24.44,0:01:28.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's tight. You're so strong.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:52.72,0:01:56.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's bubbling over.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:14.04,0:02:18.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's on the house... for you.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:18.88,0:02:22.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, my God! You inspire me. Have a\Ngreat day. I will... and you.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:26.80,0:02:30.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thank you. Ciao.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:35.20,0:02:38.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Moss, have you seen the video\Nof the baby speaking French?
Dialogue: 0,0:02:38.64,0:02:42.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It went viral at 10:30, Roy,\Nof course I've seen it.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:42.44,0:02:44.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I must have been in the toilet.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:44.80,0:02:47.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ah, Jen, exciting news,\NI've just uploaded the second
Dialogue: 0,0:02:47.48,0:02:50.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,episode of my board games\Nreview show.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:50.28,0:02:54.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Care to have a look?
Dialogue: 0,0:02:55.12,0:02:57.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That was fast.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:57.20,0:03:01.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Seems like only yesterday that we had\Nto sit through the last one.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:01.56,0:03:04.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was three months ago, Jen.\NReally?
Dialogue: 0,0:03:04.32,0:03:07.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It feels like it just happened.\NRoy, did you hear that?
Dialogue: 0,0:03:07.84,0:03:11.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Moss has done his board game review\Nshow again. I'm not watching that.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:12.16,0:03:13.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not watching that again.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:13.80,0:03:16.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jesus Christ, we don't have\Nto watch it, do we?
Dialogue: 0,0:03:17.00,0:03:19.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We only sat through the\Nfirst one the other day.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:19.64,0:03:23.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was three months ago. My God!\NWow, it feels like it just ended.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:26.64,0:03:30.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was so boring! It was like being\Ninsane, it was so insanely boring!
Dialogue: 0,0:03:34.52,0:03:38.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Roy's not a fan\Nbut you said you liked it.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:38.72,0:03:42.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Where did you get your coffee?\NA new place. Any good? Really good.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:44.08,0:03:46.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You specifically said, and I quote,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:46.44,0:03:49.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"You must show me the next one,\NMoss." Did I?
Dialogue: 0,0:03:49.32,0:03:51.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Did I really? My God!
Dialogue: 0,0:03:51.72,0:03:53.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, if you'll excuse me,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:53.32,0:03:55.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that'll be my lady love\Nfrom the seventh floor.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:55.96,0:03:59.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's going well? Oh, yeah!\NHe's cock-a-hoop over this Sheila.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:01.96,0:04:03.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,OK, so that'll be over soon, then.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:03.96,0:04:06.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hey, I'll have you know that Alice\Nis nuts about me.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:06.36,0:04:10.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She thinks that I'm emotionally\Nartistic. Well, what does that mean?
Dialogue: 0,0:04:12.04,0:04:16.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Erm, she said that emotionally\NI was on the artistic spectrum.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:17.16,0:04:21.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think it means that I'm creative\Nabout my feelings, you know,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:22.96,0:04:26.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,more in tune with her wants\Nand needs than most men.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:26.48,0:04:29.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, she's rung out...\NThat keeps happening.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:29.24,0:04:30.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,All right, if I'd said I'd watch it,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:30.96,0:04:33.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,then I suppose that's what\NI'm going to have to do.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:33.64,0:04:36.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's the spirit, Jen.\NCome on, let's get it over with.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:36.84,0:04:38.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now, keep an open mind.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:38.20,0:04:41.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I know the first show was a bit\N"bare boned" but I think you'll
Dialogue: 0,0:04:41.28,0:04:45.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,really enjoy my new episode,\Nor "webisode", if you prefer.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:45.16,0:04:47.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't prefer that, no-one does.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:47.04,0:04:50.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Come on, come on, sooner it starts,\Nsooner it's over.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:50.16,0:04:54.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Game board.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:58.12,0:05:02.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Game... game... game...
Dialogue: 0,0:05:07.16,0:05:09.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Game... Board.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:09.32,0:05:11.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Game... Board.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:11.80,0:05:14.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Game... Board.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:14.24,0:05:18.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Board... board... board... board...
Dialogue: 0,0:05:22.28,0:05:26.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hello and welcome to Games Board.\NToday on the show, we have...
Dialogue: 0,0:05:27.44,0:05:31.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, guys... I've been playing...
Dialogue: 0,0:05:32.28,0:05:35.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What's coming up on the show...
Dialogue: 0,0:05:35.84,0:05:39.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,..guys? I've...\NI've been playing Ports of Essen.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:39.32,0:05:42.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,A strategic trading game,\Nwhere each player takes
Dialogue: 0,0:05:43.00,0:05:47.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the role of a Danish fishing port\Nmerchant in the 16th century.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:49.68,0:05:53.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And for a change of pace, I've been\Nlooking at the expansion to
Dialogue: 0,0:05:54.84,0:05:58.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Textile Merchant, Norfolk Edition.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:59.68,0:06:02.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Two games by Reiner Kiniksi?\NHold on to your hat,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:02.48,0:06:03.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's going to be a bumpy...
Dialogue: 0,0:06:06.72,0:06:09.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Let's talk about components.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:09.20,0:06:11.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Shouldn't we do rules\Nbefore components?
Dialogue: 0,0:06:11.96,0:06:14.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It won't make any sense\Nif we do it before the rules.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:14.80,0:06:17.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Don't forget to cut this\Nconversation.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:17.28,0:06:19.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What? Well,\Ndon't let the actual programme...
Dialogue: 0,0:06:21.84,0:06:25.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How long is this? Even hearing it is\Nbad. I need to stop hearing it.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:28.76,0:06:31.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Sorry, Moss, I can't do it, it's\Nunbearable. Where are you going?
Dialogue: 0,0:06:31.72,0:06:35.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm jealous of your coffee.\NYou literally can't watch it?
Dialogue: 0,0:06:36.04,0:06:39.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I literally can't watch it.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:39.32,0:06:41.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So what can we do to make it better?
Dialogue: 0,0:06:41.80,0:06:45.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, I don't want to say anything\Nthat might hurt your feelings.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:45.48,0:06:48.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's all right, I can take it, Jen.\NI'm a big boy.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:48.92,0:06:51.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, as I say, it's slow,\Nit's so slow.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:51.84,0:06:55.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,OK, good, it is a bit slow,\Nwe can work on that.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:55.48,0:06:59.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I guess the other thing is\Nthat it's terrible.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:59.28,0:07:01.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's slow and terrible.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:01.96,0:07:04.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If a friend asked me to describe it,\NI'd say it's a slow,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:04.32,0:07:07.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,terrible thing on the internet, that\NI could only watch for a minute.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:07.32,0:07:09.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Is this helpful?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:09.36,0:07:13.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So helpful! God! Slow, terrible,\Ncould only watch it for a minute.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:17.00,0:07:19.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Wow, a lot to get our teeth\Nstuck into there.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:19.40,0:07:22.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,OK, well, let's see if I can\Nhelp you with anything else.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:22.08,0:07:24.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Erm, none of you are any\Ngood in front of a camera.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:24.80,0:07:27.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,None of us, yeah... You've got\Nreally annoying voices.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:27.56,0:07:29.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The voices are a pain, yes.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:29.08,0:07:31.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I guess that's because you\Nhaven't got any confidence.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:31.84,0:07:35.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No confidence. I mean, if there's\None thing you need, it's confidence.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:35.04,0:07:37.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It is confidence. Absolutely.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:37.52,0:07:40.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, Jen, I can only thank you,\Nonce again... And another thing...
Dialogue: 0,0:07:40.40,0:07:44.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not listening any more!
Dialogue: 0,0:07:48.64,0:07:52.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Douglas, you're encourageable.\NI'm encourageable?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:52.04,0:07:53.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You're Raymond Peterfellow,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:53.80,0:07:56.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,owner of the finest lap-dancing\Nestablishments in So-ho,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:56.88,0:08:00.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,if anyone's encourageable it's you,\Nyou perfumed porno vampire.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:03.80,0:08:06.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Perfumed porno vampire, I like that.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:06.92,0:08:10.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So you're thinking of having 500 of\Nthese travelling across London?
Dialogue: 0,0:08:10.80,0:08:13.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's what I said. Sexy and classy.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:13.12,0:08:15.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And that's difficult to pull off.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:15.28,0:08:17.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This will get people talking,\Nall right.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:17.60,0:08:19.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Consider me one happy shareholder.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:20.00,0:08:24.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Right. Oh, big party coming up on\NThursday night, if you're up for it?
Dialogue: 0,0:08:24.56,0:08:27.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Damn, I'm supposed to be doing\NSecret Millionaire.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:27.28,0:08:30.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,BLEEP it, I'll cancel.\NI'll tell my assistant.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:31.00,0:08:34.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hi, Joan. Jen. I'm not your\Nassistant, Mr Reynholm.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:34.16,0:08:36.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want you to cancel\NSecret Millionaire for me.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:36.40,0:08:38.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not your assistant,\Nwouldn't know who to call.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:38.68,0:08:41.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Just say anything, work your usual\Nmagic. Not your assistant.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:41.44,0:08:43.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I am not your...
Dialogue: 0,0:08:43.44,0:08:45.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, I'm sorry, I thought\Nthis was the toilet.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:45.72,0:08:47.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Didn't this used to be toilets?
Dialogue: 0,0:08:47.20,0:08:51.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yes, I moved my office here to be\Ncloser to the ladies toilets.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:52.08,0:08:55.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Must get someone to take\Nthat sign down.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:55.56,0:08:57.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What's wrong with you, Ross?
Dialogue: 0,0:08:57.96,0:09:01.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Small mocha, please.\NSmall mocha, please. Okey-dokey.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:04.88,0:09:07.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Or medium...
Dialogue: 0,0:09:07.96,0:09:11.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, you know what? I've changed\Nmy mind, I think I'll have a medium.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:11.28,0:09:15.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, you don't want a small one?
Dialogue: 0,0:09:15.56,0:09:19.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Small's fine, small is just as good,\Nso I'll... just...
Dialogue: 0,0:09:19.24,0:09:22.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yes, that is what I'll have, I'll\Nhave a small mocha, my little man.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:22.96,0:09:26.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My good man.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:27.16,0:09:31.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,OK, coming up.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:43.84,0:09:47.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Got it?
Dialogue: 0,0:09:53.72,0:09:56.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,OK.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:56.68,0:10:00.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Fuck's sake.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:06.56,0:10:10.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thank you for the virgin\Ngin and tonic.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:10.40,0:10:14.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I suppose you could just call\Nit tonic. Yes.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:15.00,0:10:18.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, Ross, how goes it in\Nthe world of computers?
Dialogue: 0,0:10:18.68,0:10:21.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Or PC world, if you will?
Dialogue: 0,0:10:21.28,0:10:23.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We're all very happy,\Nthank you, Mr Reynholm.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:23.36,0:10:27.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Very happy indeed. Forget this "we"\Nmalarky, I'm talking to you, Ross.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:27.48,0:10:30.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Are you happy? Very happy,\Nthank you, Mr Reynholm.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:30.88,0:10:32.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Look, I'm not your boss.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:32.44,0:10:34.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We're just a couple of guys,\Na couple of guys,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:34.48,0:10:38.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,shooting this shit,\Nnow tell me the truth.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:38.36,0:10:42.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, I suppose, sometimes I do\Nfeel I lack a little confidence.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:43.88,0:10:45.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I know, it's silly.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:45.76,0:10:49.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No, I've just realised what\Na funny voice you have.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:50.72,0:10:52.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now, Ross, I'm going to\Ntell you something.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:52.84,0:10:56.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Confidence is a confidence trick.\NLook at me, what do you see?
Dialogue: 0,0:10:58.72,0:11:02.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,A man who inherited his father's\Nsuccessful business.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:02.12,0:11:04.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Wasn't that successful.\NIt was pretty successful.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:04.76,0:11:06.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,A lot more successful than it is\Nnow, that's for sure.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:07.00,0:11:09.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,All right, all right,\Njust say the right thing.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:09.48,0:11:11.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Say the thing I want you to say.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:11.16,0:11:14.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Say, "A confident man", say "A\Nconfident man". A confident man.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:14.92,0:11:18.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I wasn't always this way. There was\Na time when I was just like you.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:18.08,0:11:20.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But then I discovered the secret.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:20.88,0:11:23.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And, Ross, I'm going to tell you\Nwhat that secret is
Dialogue: 0,0:11:23.24,0:11:25.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but you must keep it to yourself.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:25.24,0:11:29.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I will take my ears to the grave.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:30.24,0:11:34.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Two words. Women's slacks.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:39.64,0:11:42.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm sorry?
Dialogue: 0,0:11:42.08,0:11:46.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Women's slacks.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:46.84,0:11:50.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Women's slacks? Yes.\NI'm wearing women's slacks.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:53.04,0:11:57.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You're wearing women's slacks? Yes.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:00.64,0:12:04.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's nothing like what I thought\Nyou were going to say. Is it not?
Dialogue: 0,0:12:04.64,0:12:06.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It is not.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:06.24,0:12:09.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I thought you were going to give me\Na book recommendation, or something.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:10.64,0:12:14.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Book recommendation? I can't read.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:14.08,0:12:16.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No, I don't know what it is,\Nbut women's slacks give me
Dialogue: 0,0:12:16.80,0:12:20.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the confidence I need to survive\Nin a tough business world.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:20.20,0:12:23.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They're lighter, airier and less\Nconstricted than men's trousers
Dialogue: 0,0:12:23.56,0:12:26.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I'm pretty sure it doesn't\Nmake me a transvestite.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:28.01,0:12:32.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Look at that shit, look at it.\NI can't... How am I supposed to...
Dialogue: 0,0:12:32.13,0:12:36.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It looks like he milked a cow over\Nit. You're so fussy about coffee.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:36.41,0:12:40.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's very annoying. It's ruined.\NHe ruined my coffee.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:40.21,0:12:42.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Don't just chuck it like that.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:42.05,0:12:44.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That fellow shouldn't be allowed to\Nbe a barista. Why not?
Dialogue: 0,0:12:44.85,0:12:48.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because he's too small, Jen. He's\Nclearly too small to be a barista.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:50.41,0:12:54.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What? You're being a bit of\Na small person racist, Roy.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:56.77,0:12:59.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,A small person racist?\NThat's not a thing.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:59.57,0:13:01.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You can't have tiny baristas, Jen.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:01.69,0:13:05.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,For God's sake,\Nthe man works with steam.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:05.41,0:13:07.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm going\Nto have to have a word with him.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:07.93,0:13:11.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Have a word with him?\NThat's right. About his height?
Dialogue: 0,0:13:13.77,0:13:17.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think he'd appreciate\Nthe feedback. About his height?
Dialogue: 0,0:13:18.45,0:13:20.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's not what people do, Roy.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:20.45,0:13:23.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, I'm not people, Jen,\Nand I think that's a good thing.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:23.17,0:13:25.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not afraid to cut through\Nthe bullshit.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:25.45,0:13:29.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I bet this is exactly what Alison\Nwas talking about. Autistic.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:30.45,0:13:34.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She said, "Autistic."\NThat's what happened.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:34.65,0:13:38.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No, I don't think so. There is no\Nartistic spectrum.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:38.89,0:13:42.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But she's so...
Dialogue: 0,0:13:42.29,0:13:45.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Did she say it during an argument,\Nby any chance?
Dialogue: 0,0:13:45.73,0:13:48.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She did say it during a...\NShe did say it...
Dialogue: 0,0:13:48.69,0:13:52.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You know what was weird, was\Nwe were having quite a big argument
Dialogue: 0,0:13:52.21,0:13:56.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then suddenly, out of nowhere,\Nshe paid me that lovely compliment.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:59.29,0:14:01.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hey, baby.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:01.57,0:14:05.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, oh, good, good, yes.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:05.49,0:14:09.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Sure, yeah, I'd love to.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:09.01,0:14:13.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yes, OK, well I'll see you there.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:13.21,0:14:16.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What? Why? No.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:16.57,0:14:20.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hello? Alice?
Dialogue: 0,0:14:21.73,0:14:25.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That was weird. What? OK,\Nso, what the hell is that?
Dialogue: 0,0:14:26.81,0:14:29.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So she tells me that her grandfather\Ndied, she wants me to go to the
Dialogue: 0,0:14:29.69,0:14:33.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,funeral. I say that I'd be\Ndelighted, and then she hangs on me.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:33.81,0:14:36.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Her grandfather's funeral? Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:36.09,0:14:38.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's what you were just talking\Nabout just there. That's right.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:38.93,0:14:42.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You sounded like you were being\Ninvited to Glastonbury.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:43.05,0:14:47.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, funerals are sad. You did not\Nsound sad.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:49.25,0:14:50.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I wasn't concentrating.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:50.57,0:14:53.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Emotionally artistic? You're\Nemotionally colour-blind,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:53.17,0:14:56.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that's what you are.\NMaybe I am emotional colour-blind.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:56.69,0:14:59.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was about to confront that\Nlittle man. I know.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:59.05,0:15:01.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was going to give him shit about\Nhis height.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:01.13,0:15:05.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Glad you realise now how\Ninappropriate that would've been.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:05.93,0:15:09.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'll just leave him a note.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:30.01,0:15:34.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm here on purpose. Oh, yes.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:36.05,0:15:40.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm interested in women's slacks.\NI see.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:40.81,0:15:44.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'd like... Sorry. Hot ear.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:45.53,0:15:49.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'd like to buy a pair\Nof women's slacks.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:50.49,0:15:53.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,For me, not for a woman.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:53.37,0:15:57.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, yes,\Nwell, that shouldn't be a problem.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:57.37,0:16:01.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not trying to look like a woman.\NI understand.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:02.97,0:16:05.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not a confident man.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:05.45,0:16:09.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Quite. Well, let's see what we can\Ndo for you.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:14.25,0:16:16.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't know about this.\NOh, just ask them, Jen.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:16.89,0:16:19.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Me and Juan, we have a thing.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:19.61,0:16:22.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't want another splashy-splashy\Ncoffee from the teeny-tiny
Dialogue: 0,0:16:22.45,0:16:25.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,coffee man. Poor woman.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:25.01,0:16:28.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No, no, no, don't give her money.\NYou're not supposed to do that.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:28.33,0:16:32.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm actually a person,\NRoy, with human feelings.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:40.41,0:16:42.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm sorry, I thought you were...
Dialogue: 0,0:16:44.49,0:16:47.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't know what to do.\NHere's £5. Do you want £5?
Dialogue: 0,0:16:48.77,0:16:52.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't know if you want money. I'm\Nsorry, I'm sorry.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:52.57,0:16:56.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm sorry, I'm sorry. What happened?\NNever mind, just go.
Dialogue: 0,0:17:07.37,0:17:11.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What do you think? I think...
Dialogue: 0,0:17:12.41,0:17:16.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you just sold a brother some slacks.
Dialogue: 0,0:17:20.29,0:17:24.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Help, help, get off me!\NLet go. You're a bully.
Dialogue: 0,0:17:25.43,0:17:29.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Need to save that old woman,\Nbut I have no confidence.
Dialogue: 0,0:17:42.95,0:17:46.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hey!
Dialogue: 0,0:17:53.43,0:17:57.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thank you.
Dialogue: 0,0:18:06.63,0:18:10.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hey, come, come, no queue for you.\NCome on.
Dialogue: 0,0:18:11.91,0:18:15.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hello, Juan. I'm with her.
Dialogue: 0,0:18:16.79,0:18:20.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It must be my birthday. I get to see\Nyou twice so quick. Back again.
Dialogue: 0,0:18:21.55,0:18:23.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Same as usual, please.
Dialogue: 0,0:18:23.43,0:18:24.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Could I ask you a huge favour
Dialogue: 0,0:18:24.63,0:18:27.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and ask you to make Roy's\Ncoffee for him, too?
Dialogue: 0,0:18:27.19,0:18:31.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I've been going on and on about you.\NAnd I like what I heard.
Dialogue: 0,0:18:31.35,0:18:33.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Would that be OK?\NWould you mind?
Dialogue: 0,0:18:33.47,0:18:37.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Of course, anything for you, my\Nsweet. OK.
Dialogue: 0,0:18:43.51,0:18:47.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Slippery fingers.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:13.75,0:19:17.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's all right. It's not all right.\NLook, it looks like me with a beard.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:20.95,0:19:24.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't want this. It's horrible.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:26.43,0:19:30.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, my God! I didn't mean to.\NI don't hate you.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:32.39,0:19:33.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,None of this is on purpose.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:36.19,0:19:39.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What can I do?\NLet me give you some money.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:39.35,0:19:43.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Here's £10. Oh, my God!
Dialogue: 0,0:19:44.19,0:19:45.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not with her.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:45.79,0:19:49.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oi! Oi! Did you write this comment?\NWhat? No.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:49.31,0:19:51.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You've got a problem with\Nsmaller people?
Dialogue: 0,0:19:51.19,0:19:54.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't have a problem with small\Npeople, OK? I don't.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:54.99,0:19:57.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I just don't want you\Nmaking my coffee.
Dialogue: 0,0:19:57.43,0:20:00.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because you're bad at it.\NYou're bad at making coffee.
Dialogue: 0,0:20:00.83,0:20:03.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You're too small. You're too\Nsmall to make good coffee.
Dialogue: 0,0:20:03.31,0:20:07.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You know what? Up yours. No!
Dialogue: 0,0:20:07.19,0:20:11.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Little man, watch out!
Dialogue: 0,0:20:13.03,0:20:15.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's being called\Nthe viral video of the year.
Dialogue: 0,0:20:15.55,0:20:18.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,A woman throws her coffee\Nonto a tramp
Dialogue: 0,0:20:18.07,0:20:21.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then a man has an argument\Nwith a small barista.
Dialogue: 0,0:20:21.35,0:20:23.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You're just too small.
Dialogue: 0,0:20:23.71,0:20:27.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The barista goes to cross the road\Nand is hit by a van with breasts.
Dialogue: 0,0:20:29.99,0:20:32.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The woman who's been dubbed by\Nvarious online commentators
Dialogue: 0,0:20:32.63,0:20:36.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as Coffee Tramp Toss Bitch\Nhas not been identified,
Dialogue: 0,0:20:36.59,0:20:40.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,while the man known as\NSmall Person Racist was also...
Dialogue: 0,0:20:42.79,0:20:46.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Small people are not a race.\NThis isn't Game Of Thrones.
Dialogue: 0,0:20:48.67,0:20:52.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They're actually calling me\Na bitch on the news.
Dialogue: 0,0:20:52.75,0:20:55.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What the hell happened there?\NHow did you find out it was us?
Dialogue: 0,0:20:55.87,0:20:59.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's all here in the weekly\Nsurveillance report.
Dialogue: 0,0:20:59.55,0:21:02.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What's going on, Joan?\NI expect better from my assistant.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:02.75,0:21:04.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not your assistant.\NMy name isn't Joan.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:04.83,0:21:08.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What's your beef with the homeless?\NI don't have any homeless beef.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:08.59,0:21:12.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ah, so it's women you hate.\NWell, that I can understand.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:13.95,0:21:17.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Whoa, whoa, you record our\Ne-mails and tape our phone calls?
Dialogue: 0,0:21:17.35,0:21:19.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,All right, dry your eyes, Bono.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:19.59,0:21:22.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you've nothing to hide,\Nyou've nothing to fear.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:22.43,0:21:25.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It wasn't my fault Mr Renholm.\NI would never throw coffee over
Dialogue: 0,0:21:25.59,0:21:26.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a homeless woman.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:26.91,0:21:29.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I would never abuse a small person,
Dialogue: 0,0:21:29.51,0:21:33.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,certainly not enough to make a van\Nwith tits hit him.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:34.71,0:21:38.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Although, I suppose I sort of did.\NI sort of did my one, too.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:38.67,0:21:42.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's frustrating that we did\Nboth of our things. Yes, it is.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:42.03,0:21:44.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,All right, spare me.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:44.07,0:21:48.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was young once, but if this gets\Nout, this could deeply damage
Dialogue: 0,0:21:48.35,0:21:51.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Renholm Industry's ability to make\Nthat product that we make.
Dialogue: 0,0:21:51.83,0:21:53.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What do you want us\Nto do, Mr Renholm?
Dialogue: 0,0:21:53.91,0:21:57.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Don't do anything. Stay\Nout of trouble and remember:
Dialogue: 0,0:21:58.07,0:22:02.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There are places lower than\Nthe basement.
Dialogue: 0,0:22:09.87,0:22:12.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Stop worrying, Jen. Nobody can\Nmake us out in that video.
Dialogue: 0,0:22:12.79,0:22:15.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's just like early footage of\Nhappy slapping. Just relax.
Dialogue: 0,0:22:15.51,0:22:18.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I can't relax. It's all\Nright for you. I have plans.
Dialogue: 0,0:22:18.31,0:22:22.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want to get up there. I will not\Nbe a social piranha. A what, now?
Dialogue: 0,0:22:24.39,0:22:27.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jen, take a look at this. What is it?\NIt's the new-look game board.
Dialogue: 0,0:22:27.91,0:22:31.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,200,000 views?\NI know. It's a bit different.
Dialogue: 0,0:22:35.15,0:22:37.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Check it out. Game board.\NShut the fridge. It's...
Dialogue: 0,0:22:37.35,0:22:41.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Game board.\NBLEEP game board.
Dialogue: 0,0:22:44.27,0:22:48.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Say what?
Dialogue: 0,0:22:50.11,0:22:53.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Wow!\NYou all seem different somehow. Yes.
Dialogue: 0,0:22:53.35,0:22:56.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We're all wearing women's trousers.
Dialogue: 0,0:22:56.95,0:22:59.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh. Right.
Dialogue: 0,0:22:59.35,0:23:01.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hey, what's going on? Let's get the\Ngame board.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:01.83,0:23:04.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He is... Newton Sinclair.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:04.15,0:23:07.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This guy is... Roger Booth.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:07.47,0:23:10.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I guess I'm still Maurice Moss.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:10.83,0:23:13.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Are you wearing your trousers now?
Dialogue: 0,0:23:13.03,0:23:16.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I couldn't wear them all the time,\NJen - I'd have a heart attack.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:16.75,0:23:20.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No, they're safely locked\Naway in my fortress of solitude.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:20.99,0:23:24.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's funny - when I wear them,\NI'm a dynamo.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:24.15,0:23:27.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,A young Leonard Kravitz,\Npeople hanging off my every word.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:27.03,0:23:30.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then as soon as I take them off,\NI'm just back to being the same...
Dialogue: 0,0:23:30.55,0:23:34.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She's gone, hasn't she? She's gone.\NShe went quite a while ago. Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:35.43,0:23:39.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, Michael Buble's here.\NNo, no, it's a funeral, Moss.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:39.43,0:23:42.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I have to go to this\Nfuneral for Alice's grandfather
Dialogue: 0,0:23:42.47,0:23:44.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I'm not looking forward to it.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:44.19,0:23:47.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Funerals are pain in the crack.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:47.27,0:23:50.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Even in the best of circumstances,\Nthey're no picnic,
Dialogue: 0,0:23:50.39,0:23:54.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but now I've got Alice on my arse,\Nlike the emotion police.
Dialogue: 0,0:23:54.47,0:23:57.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm going to have to look\Nconvincingly sad
Dialogue: 0,0:23:57.83,0:24:01.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for the majority of the day.
Dialogue: 0,0:24:01.83,0:24:05.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She's not going to expect me to cry,\Nis she? No. What if she does?
Dialogue: 0,0:24:06.67,0:24:09.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I can't cry on cue. What do I do\Nthen?
Dialogue: 0,0:24:09.03,0:24:13.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Do what I do when I need to cry.\NUse a mild pepper-spray solution.
Dialogue: 0,0:24:14.75,0:24:16.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now that makes sense. See?
Dialogue: 0,0:24:16.95,0:24:19.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That makes more sense than\Nhaving to feel something.
Dialogue: 0,0:24:19.71,0:24:21.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Do you have any of that stuff here?
Dialogue: 0,0:24:21.47,0:24:24.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Why do you think\Nwe have a mini-fridge?
Dialogue: 0,0:24:24.07,0:24:27.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Good evening.
Dialogue: 0,0:24:27.99,0:24:29.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You've got quite a lot of it.
Dialogue: 0,0:24:29.55,0:24:31.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I suppose I have made\Nquite a lot of it.
Dialogue: 0,0:24:31.71,0:24:35.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And what's in here? Just Tabasco,\Nwasabi and a bit of tear gas.
Dialogue: 0,0:24:38.83,0:24:42.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Those sound like bad things to put\Nin your eyes. It's extremely mild.
Dialogue: 0,0:24:42.71,0:24:46.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's mainly water. OK, I'll take it\Nas a last resort. As a last resort?
Dialogue: 0,0:24:47.35,0:24:50.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In case I find myself out\Nof my emotional death. There you go.
Dialogue: 0,0:24:50.15,0:24:54.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,All right. Thanks, Moss.\NBye. Bye.
Dialogue: 0,0:24:56.81,0:24:59.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, don't forget to add the water.
Dialogue: 0,0:25:11.94,0:25:13.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, poor Pip Pop.
Dialogue: 0,0:25:13.96,0:25:16.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Sorry, what?
Dialogue: 0,0:25:16.32,0:25:17.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Pip Pop...
Dialogue: 0,0:25:17.88,0:25:21.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We always called him Pip Pop\Nbecause he was so short.
Dialogue: 0,0:25:23.36,0:25:27.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,All of my family on that side\Nare really short.
Dialogue: 0,0:25:27.04,0:25:30.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Is that right?
Dialogue: 0,0:25:34.88,0:25:36.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh...
Dialogue: 0,0:25:36.76,0:25:38.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, Alice.
Dialogue: 0,0:25:38.08,0:25:42.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Shh...
Dialogue: 0,0:25:49.56,0:25:50.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh!
Dialogue: 0,0:25:50.60,0:25:52.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Roy, are you all right? Holy...!
Dialogue: 0,0:25:52.64,0:25:54.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, it just really hurts.
Dialogue: 0,0:25:54.88,0:25:56.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, darling.
Dialogue: 0,0:25:56.40,0:26:00.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, it hurts. I know. I know.
Dialogue: 0,0:26:02.80,0:26:06.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh...
Dialogue: 0,0:26:11.48,0:26:15.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, Christ,\Nwhy is this happening?
Dialogue: 0,0:26:15.88,0:26:19.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'Will we ever find out\Njust who this person was?
Dialogue: 0,0:26:19.72,0:26:22.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'Unfortunately, with current\Ntechnology we can't depixelate
Dialogue: 0,0:26:22.52,0:26:25.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'the picture, so it's very unlikely\Nwe'll ever find out
Dialogue: 0,0:26:25.20,0:26:29.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'the identity of\Nthis dreadful ginger cow.'
Dialogue: 0,0:26:32.96,0:26:36.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, are you still crying?\NI don't seem to be able to stop.
Dialogue: 0,0:26:38.56,0:26:42.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,One of the pallbearers wasn't able\Nto make it. Oh...
Dialogue: 0,0:26:42.24,0:26:44.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Look, I know this is a bit weird.
Dialogue: 0,0:26:44.100,0:26:47.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Do you mind stepping in?
Dialogue: 0,0:26:47.12,0:26:50.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm happy to. I mean, I'm certainly\Nhappy to. Yeah, that's fine.
Dialogue: 0,0:26:50.96,0:26:53.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's fine.
Dialogue: 0,0:26:53.16,0:26:56.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hi, thanks so much for helping us\Nout. No problem.
Dialogue: 0,0:26:56.80,0:26:58.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hey!
Dialogue: 0,0:26:58.48,0:27:00.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hello. Oh, there's another one.
Dialogue: 0,0:27:00.80,0:27:04.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hi. Have you seen the\Npallbearers? Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,0:27:04.08,0:27:08.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So you guys and me, we are going to\Ncarry the coffin together? Yes.
Dialogue: 0,0:27:09.96,0:27:13.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We are going to put the casket\Non our collective shoulders
Dialogue: 0,0:27:14.36,0:27:16.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and walk in a straight line with it?
Dialogue: 0,0:27:16.68,0:27:19.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No, it didn't go well, Jen.\NIt didn't go well at all.
Dialogue: 0,0:27:19.08,0:27:21.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean, thanks for asking,\Nbut no, it wasn't a success.
Dialogue: 0,0:27:21.88,0:27:24.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It wasn't a successful funeral\Nfor me.
Dialogue: 0,0:27:24.60,0:27:28.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It didn't have the required\Ngravitas.
Dialogue: 0,0:27:28.08,0:27:30.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Gravitas? No, no.
Dialogue: 0,0:27:30.28,0:27:34.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It wasn't very dignified.\NIt wasn't dignified at all, Jen.
Dialogue: 0,0:27:35.16,0:27:38.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If I had to pick a word to describe\NPip Pop's final journey
Dialogue: 0,0:27:38.92,0:27:42.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to the grave, it would be "funny".
Dialogue: 0,0:27:43.32,0:27:46.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was so funny, Jen.\NOf course, I tried not to laugh
Dialogue: 0,0:27:46.92,0:27:49.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I tried to put\Nother things in my head,
Dialogue: 0,0:27:49.16,0:27:52.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but every step that we took\Nwas a fresh reminder
Dialogue: 0,0:27:52.04,0:27:56.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of just how funny\Nthe whole thing was!
Dialogue: 0,0:27:56.08,0:28:00.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You didn't laugh, did you?\NI laughed my hole off.
Dialogue: 0,0:28:01.48,0:28:03.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I can't believe\Nshe's still with you.
Dialogue: 0,0:28:03.68,0:28:06.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I suppose, but, I mean, I'm hanging\Non by a thread, Jen.
Dialogue: 0,0:28:06.20,0:28:10.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think I'll just get through it\Nas long as nothing else bad happens.
Dialogue: 0,0:28:14.52,0:28:18.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's the phone now.
Dialogue: 0,0:28:19.24,0:28:22.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'The new footage has led\Nto the pair being identified,
Dialogue: 0,0:28:22.84,0:28:26.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'Jen Barber and Roy Trenneman, both\Nemployees at Reynholm Industries.'
Dialogue: 0,0:28:27.60,0:28:29.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What the hell were you thinking?
Dialogue: 0,0:28:29.48,0:28:32.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I told you to keep a low profile
Dialogue: 0,0:28:32.16,0:28:35.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and you do it again!
Dialogue: 0,0:28:35.64,0:28:38.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No, no, no, no, no, it's new\Nfootage, Mr Reynholm.
Dialogue: 0,0:28:38.12,0:28:40.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Bum your excuses!
Dialogue: 0,0:28:40.16,0:28:43.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Reynholm Industries has\Na reputation to uphold.
Dialogue: 0,0:28:43.48,0:28:46.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We're not News International,\Nfor Christ's sake!
Dialogue: 0,0:28:46.96,0:28:49.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm going to have to do Secret\N"Pissing" Millionaire now
Dialogue: 0,0:28:49.72,0:28:51.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just to undo your damage!
Dialogue: 0,0:28:51.60,0:28:54.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I'm missing out\Non a massive party!
Dialogue: 0,0:28:54.76,0:28:58.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You're no longer my assistant.
Dialogue: 0,0:28:59.16,0:29:02.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm furious.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:02.68,0:29:04.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I'll tell you something else,
Dialogue: 0,0:29:04.44,0:29:07.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when I return from the estate,\Nit's...
Dialogue: 0,0:29:07.100,0:29:11.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,..for you.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:14.68,0:29:15.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh...
Dialogue: 0,0:29:17.16,0:29:19.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh!
Dialogue: 0,0:29:19.48,0:29:21.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hello, hey, baby.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:21.64,0:29:23.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, yeah, of course.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:23.84,0:29:25.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No, absolutely.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:25.28,0:29:29.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,All right, OK. Bye-bye.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:29.24,0:29:33.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She left you? She did. Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:35.28,0:29:38.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,As the identities\Nof Coffee Toss Tramp Bitch
Dialogue: 0,0:29:38.44,0:29:41.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and Small Person Racist\Nare finally revealed,
Dialogue: 0,0:29:41.32,0:29:43.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we at Channel 4 News ask,
Dialogue: 0,0:29:43.12,0:29:47.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"What the hell\Nis wrong with people?"
Dialogue: 0,0:29:53.68,0:29:56.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I've got a lot of new\Nfollowers on Chitter.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:56.08,0:29:57.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Loads more followers, yeah.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:57.68,0:29:59.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They're all very abusive.
Dialogue: 0,0:29:59.24,0:30:00.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They wish we were dead.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:00.72,0:30:02.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Wait.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:02.52,0:30:04.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What? Chitter.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:04.100,0:30:08.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We can use Chitter\Nto explain ourselves.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:09.48,0:30:11.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:11.24,0:30:14.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Chitter is the perfect place to\Nexplain a complex situation.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:14.16,0:30:15.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I know that.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:15.48,0:30:17.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I didn't mean to throw\Ncoffee on that woman.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:17.76,0:30:19.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I didn't know she was there.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:19.32,0:30:21.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I went back to try and find her\Nbut..."
Dialogue: 0,0:30:21.80,0:30:25.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh... Too many characters.\NToo many characters.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:25.68,0:30:27.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Got it.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:27.08,0:30:29.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Hate the homeless.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:29.32,0:30:32.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"And I suppose I hate women, too?
Dialogue: 0,0:30:32.36,0:30:34.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"LOL."
Dialogue: 0,0:30:34.56,0:30:35.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Send.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:35.72,0:30:39.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Whoa. You didn't just send\Nthat, did you? Yes.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:39.08,0:30:40.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That didn't sound so good.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:40.44,0:30:43.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,People get the sense of it,\Nthat's the thing about Chitter.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:43.08,0:30:45.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's best if you're conversational\Nand off-the-cuff.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:45.92,0:30:47.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Here it is.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:47.40,0:30:50.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh... You didn't put a question\Nmark after the first sentence.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:50.80,0:30:53.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You don't need to\Nuse proper grammar on Chitter.
Dialogue: 0,0:30:53.08,0:30:55.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What you've Chitted here, Jen,\Nis,
Dialogue: 0,0:30:55.100,0:30:59.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Hate the homeless and I suppose\NI hate women, too. LOL."
Dialogue: 0,0:31:01.80,0:31:05.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Phew, I'm glad all that's over.
Dialogue: 0,0:32:11.68,0:32:14.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You're too small,\Nyou're just too small!
Dialogue: 0,0:32:14.32,0:32:18.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You're too small,\Ntoo small, too small...
Dialogue: 0,0:32:18.16,0:32:22.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'Which then leads to him\Nbeing hit by a van with tits.'
Dialogue: 0,0:32:31.96,0:32:34.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And now Anonymous are after us.
Dialogue: 0,0:32:34.92,0:32:37.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, that's just ideal.
Dialogue: 0,0:32:37.44,0:32:40.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, a bunch of nerds sitting\Nat their computer, what can they do?
Dialogue: 0,0:32:40.76,0:32:44.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We pissed off the Internet, Jen.\NThe Internet is coming to get us!
Dialogue: 0,0:32:45.76,0:32:49.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, let's get IT\Nbefore IT gets us.
Dialogue: 0,0:32:50.08,0:32:53.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What are you...?
Dialogue: 0,0:32:53.20,0:32:56.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, I don't want Anonymous after me.
Dialogue: 0,0:32:56.12,0:32:58.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I am inanonymous...
Dialogue: 0,0:32:58.24,0:33:00.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think.
Dialogue: 0,0:33:00.72,0:33:04.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Let's hide it.
Dialogue: 0,0:33:04.96,0:33:06.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What?
Dialogue: 0,0:33:06.44,0:33:09.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Internet.
Dialogue: 0,0:33:09.24,0:33:12.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh...
Dialogue: 0,0:33:12.52,0:33:16.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because we told you\Nthat was the Internet?
Dialogue: 0,0:33:16.96,0:33:18.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yes.
Dialogue: 0,0:33:18.76,0:33:22.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We never told you\Nit wasn't the Internet?
Dialogue: 0,0:33:23.20,0:33:24.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No.
Dialogue: 0,0:33:24.76,0:33:27.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, the thing is, Jen...
Dialogue: 0,0:33:27.96,0:33:30.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that's not the Internet.
Dialogue: 0,0:33:30.68,0:33:34.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What's Jen doing with the Internet?
Dialogue: 0,0:33:34.76,0:33:38.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We're not doing that. Oh...
Dialogue: 0,0:33:38.64,0:33:41.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Cricket!
Dialogue: 0,0:33:41.64,0:33:44.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Right, don't be scared, yeah.
Dialogue: 0,0:33:44.04,0:33:45.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We're all friends here.
Dialogue: 0,0:33:45.92,0:33:49.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Tell Dougie your story?\NOK, but who is he again?
Dialogue: 0,0:33:49.96,0:33:53.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm just your average social worker.
Dialogue: 0,0:33:53.28,0:33:56.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yes, just in the area\Nhaving a look around.
Dialogue: 0,0:33:56.36,0:33:58.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Please just pretend I'm not here.
Dialogue: 0,0:33:58.84,0:34:01.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Do you ever have anyone come round\Nand help you and stuff?
Dialogue: 0,0:34:01.48,0:34:04.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Granddad, sometimes.\NHe's hardly around.
Dialogue: 0,0:34:04.20,0:34:07.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What about your dad?\NHe's never around, either...
Dialogue: 0,0:34:07.24,0:34:10.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Sorry, my friend, I need to stop you\Nthere. I must take this.
Dialogue: 0,0:34:10.24,0:34:11.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Reynholm...
Dialogue: 0,0:34:11.72,0:34:14.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What? Well, increase the bid.
Dialogue: 0,0:34:14.92,0:34:17.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't care what I said\Nthe ceiling was.
Dialogue: 0,0:34:17.36,0:34:20.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want that artwork by Madonna.
Dialogue: 0,0:34:20.100,0:34:24.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now, 22 million is the minimum\Nbut I'm happy to go to 50.
Dialogue: 0,0:34:24.80,0:34:28.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In fact, make 50 the new minimum.\NYes, yes.
Dialogue: 0,0:34:29.44,0:34:31.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I can't talk right now.
Dialogue: 0,0:34:31.60,0:34:35.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm doing Secret Millionaire.
Dialogue: 0,0:34:36.88,0:34:38.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's very sad.
Dialogue: 0,0:34:38.20,0:34:41.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Do you want to shut up,\Nwe're filming Secret Millionaire.
Dialogue: 0,0:34:41.100,0:34:45.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Check your privilege.
Dialogue: 0,0:34:45.28,0:34:46.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How am I finding it so far?
Dialogue: 0,0:34:46.76,0:34:50.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,To be honest with you, it's not as\Ngod-awful as I thought it would be.
Dialogue: 0,0:34:50.04,0:34:53.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,People have been terribly nice.\NThey're actually quite clean.
Dialogue: 0,0:34:53.60,0:34:56.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I have been invited\Nto a party this evening.
Dialogue: 0,0:34:56.28,0:35:00.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The last party I ever went to was\Nwhen Elton John's dog had a baby.
Dialogue: 0,0:35:05.68,0:35:08.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I tell a lie. The last party I went\Nto was when
Dialogue: 0,0:35:08.16,0:35:10.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Conrad Black got arrested.
Dialogue: 0,0:35:10.40,0:35:12.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Conrad Black, who's that?
Dialogue: 0,0:35:12.04,0:35:15.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, no-one, just an old friend.\NLet's get in there.
Dialogue: 0,0:35:15.12,0:35:19.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, sure.
Dialogue: 0,0:35:22.56,0:35:26.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I thought with Game Board's\Nincreased viewership,
Dialogue: 0,0:35:26.04,0:35:29.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,perhaps it would be a good place\Nto put my side of the story and
Dialogue: 0,0:35:29.40,0:35:32.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,show the world I'm not the monster\NI'm currently supposed to be.
Dialogue: 0,0:35:32.84,0:35:34.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Boo! Boo!
Dialogue: 0,0:35:34.96,0:35:36.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Don't boo, please.
Dialogue: 0,0:35:36.24,0:35:40.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That is a horrible T-shirt.
Dialogue: 0,0:35:40.44,0:35:43.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So the question everyone is asking,\NJen Barber, do you hate women?
Dialogue: 0,0:35:43.100,0:35:45.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh...
Dialogue: 0,0:35:45.92,0:35:47.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thank you, Jen Barber.
Dialogue: 0,0:35:47.72,0:35:51.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Coming up, what was it like to be\Na 14th-century grain merchant?
Dialogue: 0,0:35:52.04,0:35:55.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Wait, I don't know if that was\Nclear. Sorry, it's these trousers.
Dialogue: 0,0:35:55.08,0:35:59.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They make me want to move\Nonto the next item. It's better\Nbroadcasting and the slacks know it!
Dialogue: 0,0:35:59.64,0:36:03.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Coming up. Will you stop saying,\N"Coming up". Next... I don't know\Nif they got my point!
Dialogue: 0,0:36:05.24,0:36:07.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, gosh!
Dialogue: 0,0:36:07.04,0:36:08.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh!
Dialogue: 0,0:36:08.64,0:36:10.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, gosh.
Dialogue: 0,0:36:10.28,0:36:12.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Richmond, do you work here or not?
Dialogue: 0,0:36:12.80,0:36:16.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't get paid,\Nbut I like to come in.
Dialogue: 0,0:36:16.20,0:36:19.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So that Goth thing didn't work out?
Dialogue: 0,0:36:19.64,0:36:21.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Does it look like it worked out?
Dialogue: 0,0:36:21.84,0:36:24.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Anyway, how have you guys been?
Dialogue: 0,0:36:24.48,0:36:26.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Everyone thinks I'm a misogynist.
Dialogue: 0,0:36:26.76,0:36:29.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Roy lost his girlfriend because\Nhe's emotionally colour-blind
Dialogue: 0,0:36:29.72,0:36:33.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and Moss is wearing trousers\Nthat make him good at telly.
Dialogue: 0,0:36:33.04,0:36:34.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Any gossip?
Dialogue: 0,0:36:34.92,0:36:37.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What's going on with you?
Dialogue: 0,0:36:37.20,0:36:41.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, you know, keeping busy,\Nvoice-over work mainly.
Dialogue: 0,0:36:41.44,0:36:43.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Really, how did that happen?
Dialogue: 0,0:36:43.12,0:36:47.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Someone just noticed\NI had a beautiful voice.
Dialogue: 0,0:36:50.72,0:36:52.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, Richmond.
Dialogue: 0,0:36:52.08,0:36:53.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Things aren't going well at all.
Dialogue: 0,0:36:53.76,0:36:56.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Just get in there.
Dialogue: 0,0:36:56.04,0:36:58.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's just not the same\Nwhen you guys aren't together.
Dialogue: 0,0:36:58.44,0:37:02.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Anyway, if you want me,\Nyou know where I am.
Dialogue: 0,0:37:02.100,0:37:04.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't, though, Richmond.
Dialogue: 0,0:37:04.88,0:37:08.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Don't... lurk!
Dialogue: 0,0:37:08.56,0:37:09.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Where did he go?
Dialogue: 0,0:37:09.88,0:37:13.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Where did who go?
Dialogue: 0,0:37:16.84,0:37:19.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Does it ever seem to you that\Nthe things that happen to us
Dialogue: 0,0:37:19.88,0:37:21.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,are sort of...
Dialogue: 0,0:37:21.92,0:37:23.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,strange?
Dialogue: 0,0:37:23.60,0:37:25.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How so, Roy?
Dialogue: 0,0:37:25.72,0:37:27.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well...
Dialogue: 0,0:37:27.92,0:37:30.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,remember when I had to pretend\Nto be disabled
Dialogue: 0,0:37:30.72,0:37:33.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I ended up in Manchester?
Dialogue: 0,0:37:33.88,0:37:36.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That wasn't a normal thing\Nto happen, was it?
Dialogue: 0,0:37:36.60,0:37:40.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Or when you ended up spending\Nthe night in that arcade machine.
Dialogue: 0,0:37:41.16,0:37:43.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That was odd.
Dialogue: 0,0:37:43.96,0:37:46.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I suppose those were unusual events.
Dialogue: 0,0:37:46.60,0:37:48.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And this is strange.
Dialogue: 0,0:37:48.16,0:37:51.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What's happening to us\Nright now is strange, isn't it?
Dialogue: 0,0:37:51.16,0:37:53.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, at least,\Nit'll all be over soon.
Dialogue: 0,0:37:53.52,0:37:57.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Douglas is bound to fire us\Nwhen he gets back.
Dialogue: 0,0:37:57.76,0:37:59.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Come on, guys, this isn't us.
Dialogue: 0,0:37:59.32,0:38:01.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Are we just going to sit here\Nand take it?
Dialogue: 0,0:38:01.32,0:38:03.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What do we normally do\Nwhen we get into a scrape?
Dialogue: 0,0:38:03.68,0:38:06.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We normally make things worse\Nand worse and then it ends.
Dialogue: 0,0:38:06.08,0:38:08.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No, we don't. We stick together.\NThat doesn't sound like us.
Dialogue: 0,0:38:08.76,0:38:11.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,OK, enough... Come on, who are we?
Dialogue: 0,0:38:11.60,0:38:13.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Who are we? I want to hear\Nyou say it!
Dialogue: 0,0:38:13.56,0:38:16.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We're the IT... We're the IT...\N..Department.
Dialogue: 0,0:38:16.32,0:38:19.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You're goddamn right we are!
Dialogue: 0,0:38:19.20,0:38:21.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Are you wearing women's slacks?\NYes, I am.
Dialogue: 0,0:38:21.60,0:38:23.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is exactly what\NI'm talking about.
Dialogue: 0,0:38:26.69,0:38:29.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Let's get into a car\Nand cruise around.
Dialogue: 0,0:38:29.34,0:38:33.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How to get into a car?\NSmash a window. Great idea.
Dialogue: 0,0:38:34.58,0:38:37.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's the one.
Dialogue: 0,0:38:37.53,0:38:41.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm such an idiot.\NI've got a robot hand.
Dialogue: 0,0:38:45.34,0:38:49.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hang on a second. This is MY car.
Dialogue: 0,0:39:10.22,0:39:13.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, shit. Wow-wow-wow.\NIt's all right, everyone, be cool.
Dialogue: 0,0:39:13.10,0:39:17.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'll handle this. Take that.
Dialogue: 0,0:39:29.38,0:39:33.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's all right, Officer, I'm doing\NSecret Millionaire.
Dialogue: 0,0:39:35.34,0:39:38.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Come on, come on, come on, people.\NWhat's going on?
Dialogue: 0,0:39:38.62,0:39:40.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Come on, come on, come on, people.
Dialogue: 0,0:39:40.30,0:39:43.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How long has he been wearing the\Ntrousers? He won't take them off.
Dialogue: 0,0:39:43.30,0:39:44.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,OK, come on, come on, come on...
Dialogue: 0,0:39:44.70,0:39:47.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What's going on, what's going on?\NWe don't know what's happening.
Dialogue: 0,0:39:47.54,0:39:49.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,OK, come on. To every problem,\Nthere's a solution.
Dialogue: 0,0:39:49.82,0:39:51.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What's our problem here?\NWhat's our problem?
Dialogue: 0,0:39:51.86,0:39:55.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Everyone thinks I'm a cow who\Nhates women. You're a cow.
Dialogue: 0,0:39:57.14,0:40:01.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Terrible cow. Women, OK.\NRoy, hurt me.
Dialogue: 0,0:40:01.42,0:40:04.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Erm, the woman I love thinks that\NI hate small people.
Dialogue: 0,0:40:04.18,0:40:06.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Small people, thank you, Roy.
Dialogue: 0,0:40:06.58,0:40:09.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm probably going to die alone\Nin front of computer pornography?
Dialogue: 0,0:40:09.78,0:40:13.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'll just draw a sad face.
Dialogue: 0,0:40:16.90,0:40:20.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,OK, so what do women and\Nsmall people both like?
Dialogue: 0,0:40:22.58,0:40:26.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What do they both like? Chairs.\NFilms. I really don't know.
Dialogue: 0,0:40:28.58,0:40:32.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'll tell you. It's just they seem\Nlike very different groups.
Dialogue: 0,0:40:32.10,0:40:36.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Very different groups.\NNot being attacked.
Dialogue: 0,0:40:39.94,0:40:43.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They both love not being attacked.
Dialogue: 0,0:40:43.42,0:40:47.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, I can't speak for small people,\Nobviously, but as a woman,
Dialogue: 0,0:40:47.54,0:40:51.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I certainly like not being attacked.\NWhere are you going with this, Moss?
Dialogue: 0,0:40:51.30,0:40:53.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'll tell you exactly where I'm\Ngoing with this, Roy.
Dialogue: 0,0:40:53.62,0:40:56.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm saying that we use this brief\Nwindow, while Douglas is away,
Dialogue: 0,0:40:56.66,0:41:00.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to produce a pepper-spray\Nsolution for small women,
Dialogue: 0,0:41:00.50,0:41:02.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,using that stuff I gave Roy earlier.
Dialogue: 0,0:41:02.66,0:41:04.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That sounds really weird.
Dialogue: 0,0:41:04.18,0:41:08.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jen Barber, not a hater of women\Nbut their defender, their champion.
Dialogue: 0,0:41:08.58,0:41:10.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I love it now.
Dialogue: 0,0:41:10.78,0:41:13.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I can do a massive presentation.
Dialogue: 0,0:41:13.46,0:41:17.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,A self-defence pepper spray for\Nsmall women suits my purposes also.
Dialogue: 0,0:41:18.90,0:41:22.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It will show Alice that I care and,\Nas a woman with small relatives,
Dialogue: 0,0:41:23.50,0:41:26.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,she's sure to come to Jen's\Npresentation.
Dialogue: 0,0:41:26.18,0:41:29.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You know, when I first stocked that\Nmini-fridge with pepper-spray solution,
Dialogue: 0,0:41:29.54,0:41:33.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I thought I'd made too much... but\Nonly now do I realise
Dialogue: 0,0:41:34.82,0:41:38.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that I'd made exactly the right\Namount for our current purposes.
Dialogue: 0,0:41:40.54,0:41:44.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It almost seems like it's\Ntoo good an idea.
Dialogue: 0,0:41:44.18,0:41:48.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You see what we can do when we work\Ntogether? With my business acumen...
Dialogue: 0,0:41:48.22,0:41:52.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My scientific know-how...\NAnd I'm also here...
Dialogue: 0,0:41:53.78,0:41:57.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We can do anything! Yes! Yes!
Dialogue: 0,0:41:58.14,0:42:02.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I need a trouser break.
Dialogue: 0,0:42:08.98,0:42:10.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You coming, Roy?
Dialogue: 0,0:42:10.62,0:42:13.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I can't seem to get the wording\Nof this speech to Alice right.
Dialogue: 0,0:42:13.26,0:42:14.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You're doing a speech?
Dialogue: 0,0:42:14.66,0:42:17.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, I need to show her that I'm\Nnot emotionally colour-blind.
Dialogue: 0,0:42:17.74,0:42:21.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm actually a very sensitive human\Nman, and she needs to know that.
Dialogue: 0,0:42:21.82,0:42:25.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oooh, what's a more romantic word\Nfor "knockers"?
Dialogue: 0,0:42:26.26,0:42:28.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,A MORE romantic word?
Dialogue: 0,0:42:28.86,0:42:32.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Come on, guys. Let's protect women!\NI'll meet you up there. Good luck.
Dialogue: 0,0:42:32.82,0:42:35.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thanks.
Dialogue: 0,0:42:35.46,0:42:38.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Eartha Kitts!
Dialogue: 0,0:42:38.62,0:42:40.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Right, is everything ready?
Dialogue: 0,0:42:40.42,0:42:42.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, well, I've got the posters up
Dialogue: 0,0:42:42.02,0:42:44.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I've put gift bags with pepper\Nspray beside each chair.
Dialogue: 0,0:42:44.90,0:42:47.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now, I think it was a master stroke\Nto put the spray in these
Dialogue: 0,0:42:47.54,0:42:48.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,elegant bottles.
Dialogue: 0,0:42:48.90,0:42:51.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Why not look stylish\Nwhile you defend yourself?
Dialogue: 0,0:42:51.86,0:42:53.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Something's bothering me, though.
Dialogue: 0,0:42:53.90,0:42:57.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Are we missing something that's very\Nobviously wrong with this idea?
Dialogue: 0,0:42:57.66,0:43:01.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I really don't think so. Oh, look,\Nhere comes everyone.
Dialogue: 0,0:43:04.38,0:43:08.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hello, and welcome to this\Nvery special
Dialogue: 0,0:43:08.38,0:43:12.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,presentation for women by a woman, me\Na woman, who loves women.
Dialogue: 0,0:43:13.18,0:43:16.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,By your seats you'll find a gift bag,\Nand in that gift bag
Dialogue: 0,0:43:16.90,0:43:19.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you'll find our very\Nexciting new product.
Dialogue: 0,0:43:19.34,0:43:21.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No, don't do that.
Dialogue: 0,0:43:23.54,0:43:27.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No, you're not supposed to...
Dialogue: 0,0:43:27.30,0:43:30.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yes! I have some things\NI have to say to you!
Dialogue: 0,0:43:30.70,0:43:34.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No, I need to go.\NNo, you are going nowhere.
Dialogue: 0,0:43:34.10,0:43:38.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now, I know in the past that you\Nhave accused me
Dialogue: 0,0:43:38.10,0:43:40.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of being emotionally colour-blind.
Dialogue: 0,0:43:41.54,0:43:45.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Shut up and listen. But now I've\Nchanged - my sight is perfect.
Dialogue: 0,0:43:46.54,0:43:48.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now I know what was wrong\Nwith the idea.
Dialogue: 0,0:43:48.66,0:43:52.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,With your sweet lips and, of\Ncourse, your lovely bangers,
Dialogue: 0,0:43:53.58,0:43:55.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I know you're the one for me.
Dialogue: 0,0:43:55.78,0:43:58.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm in terrible pain.
Dialogue: 0,0:43:58.30,0:44:02.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Me, too, Alice, me, too, but that\Nends now. It ends now.
Dialogue: 0,0:44:09.98,0:44:12.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That could not have gone better.
Dialogue: 0,0:44:12.62,0:44:15.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, no, Roy, that didn't go\Nwell at all.
Dialogue: 0,0:44:15.98,0:44:19.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, right, because we're going to\Nlose our jobs.
Dialogue: 0,0:44:20.26,0:44:23.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Argh!
Dialogue: 0,0:44:23.14,0:44:24.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Mr Reynholm...
Dialogue: 0,0:44:24.34,0:44:27.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, that's the thing. I gave the boy\Nthe can of lager,
Dialogue: 0,0:44:27.78,0:44:30.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so technically I'm guilty of\Ncorrupting a minor.
Dialogue: 0,0:44:30.46,0:44:32.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So it's the reason why\NI bought the tramp uniform
Dialogue: 0,0:44:32.82,0:44:35.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I've had to make myself scarce.
Dialogue: 0,0:44:35.86,0:44:39.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, you need somewhere to hide out?\NYeah, somewhere off-piste.
Dialogue: 0,0:44:39.78,0:44:43.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Somewhere where no-one will find you.\NBottom of the world.
Dialogue: 0,0:44:43.02,0:44:45.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You can use our office\Nif you'd like. Whoo.
Dialogue: 0,0:44:45.74,0:44:48.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, I'll need someone to take\Ncare of business upstairs.
Dialogue: 0,0:44:48.34,0:44:49.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We're not doing anything.
Dialogue: 0,0:44:49.78,0:44:51.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, this is perfect.
Dialogue: 0,0:44:51.50,0:44:55.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My wonderful assistant, Joan,\Nand her two friends, Ross.
Dialogue: 0,0:44:55.50,0:44:58.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm going to go and piss around\Non the internet
Dialogue: 0,0:44:58.70,0:45:01.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but actually I'll need some food.
Dialogue: 0,0:45:01.30,0:45:05.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I've already eaten one of\Nthe toys in here.
Dialogue: 0,0:45:06.10,0:45:10.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Did he just say what I think he\Nsaid? I wasn't really listening.
Dialogue: 0,0:45:10.58,0:45:14.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Is this... Is what's happening good\Nnow? Is this good?
Dialogue: 0,0:45:16.58,0:45:19.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yes, it's a very good outcome.\NOh, my God!
Dialogue: 0,0:45:19.34,0:45:21.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think we've come out on top,\NI can't believe it.
Dialogue: 0,0:45:21.38,0:45:23.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We've come out on top.
Dialogue: 0,0:45:23.30,0:45:25.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'Jen Barber.'
Dialogue: 0,0:45:25.06,0:45:28.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, I forgot about you.\NOh, God, that's impressive.
Dialogue: 0,0:45:28.38,0:45:32.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They're actually watching us.\NHey, mate, am I an anonymous?
Dialogue: 0,0:45:33.38,0:45:36.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Silence, you person wasters.
Dialogue: 0,0:45:36.14,0:45:38.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Greetings, Jen Barber.\NThis is your sentence.
Dialogue: 0,0:45:38.86,0:45:42.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You've been found guilty of the most\Nappalling lack of basic human
Dialogue: 0,0:45:42.74,0:45:44.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,kindness and decency.
Dialogue: 0,0:45:46.10,0:45:47.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Come in.
Dialogue: 0,0:45:47.74,0:45:51.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Shush, you. Peter, what are you\Ndoing in there? Shut up!
Dialogue: 0,0:45:52.62,0:45:55.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You've been there for hours.\NI'm doing something. Go away!
Dialogue: 0,0:45:55.90,0:45:59.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Peter, your mum and I are worried\Nabout you. Get out.
Dialogue: 0,0:46:00.46,0:46:04.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You need to get off this computer.\NWho is this? Are these your friends?
Dialogue: 0,0:46:05.90,0:46:08.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm sorry. Peter can't play any\Nmore. He's coming outside.
Dialogue: 0,0:46:08.70,0:46:11.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'You said I could stay\Nhere as long as I wanted.'
Dialogue: 0,0:46:11.46,0:46:13.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We said that you had to come out.
Dialogue: 0,0:46:17.50,0:46:19.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'..do my homework...
Dialogue: 0,0:46:19.62,0:46:23.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'I've done my homework...
Dialogue: 0,0:46:24.06,0:46:26.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'I know my rights...'
Dialogue: 0,0:46:30.34,0:46:32.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This internet's not working.\NI can't connect.
Dialogue: 0,0:46:32.90,0:46:35.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Just try turning it off\Nand on again.
Dialogue: 0,0:46:35.66,0:46:39.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thanks, Ross.
Dialogue: 0,0:46:58.90,0:47:00.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Reynholm Industries is changing.
Dialogue: 0,0:47:00.98,0:47:04.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,New opportunities, new faces,\Na new direction.
Dialogue: 0,0:47:04.98,0:47:07.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,A better workplace environment.
Dialogue: 0,0:47:07.82,0:47:11.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Exciting new products.
Dialogue: 0,0:47:12.34,0:47:16.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,An inclusive hiring policy...\NI am sounding happy?
Dialogue: 0,0:47:16.10,0:47:19.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Can you be a little bit more...\NYeah, this is me being happy.
Dialogue: 0,0:47:19.34,0:47:22.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Just be a bit more, I don't know...\NI'm being upbeat.
Dialogue: 0,0:47:22.50,0:47:25.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No, I just want you to speak...\NAh, forget it, let's just stop.
Dialogue: 0,0:47:25.60,0:47:33.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Subtitles by MemoryOnSmells\Nhttp://UKsubtitles.ru.