WEBVTT

00:00:04.775 --> 00:00:07.010
Veronica: 1 er Septembre 1989.

00:00:07.518 --> 00:00:08.265
Cher journal,

00:00:09.219 --> 00:00:13.025
Je crois que je suis une bonne personne, vous savez, je pense qu'il est bon dans tout le monde, mais ...

00:00:13.411 --> 00:00:17.522
Nous voilà! Premier jour de dernière année! Et euh ...

00:00:17.897 --> 00:00:21.480
Je regarde autour de ces enfants que je connais toute ma vie et je me demande ...

00:00:21.480 --> 00:00:22.363
Qu'est-il arrivé?

00:00:22.627 --> 00:00:26.309
Étudiants: Freak! Salope! Burnout! Bug-yeux! Poseur! Lardass!

00:00:27.988 --> 00:00:32.639
V: Nous étions si petit, heureux et brillant, étiquette à jouer et pourchassé.

00:00:32.738 --> 00:00:35.257
S: Freak! Salope! Perdant! Petit autobus!

00:00:35.447 --> 00:00:38.097
V: Le chant et battements de mains, rire et faire la sieste,

00:00:38.097 --> 00:00:40.272
la cuisson des biscuits, pâte manger.

00:00:40.486 --> 00:00:42.449
S: Bull d * ke! Coincé! Bossu!

00:00:43.076 --> 00:00:45.573
V: Ensuite, nous avons eu plus, ce fut le déclencheur,

00:00:45.573 --> 00:00:47.663
comme les Huns envahissent Rome.

00:00:48.696 --> 00:00:50.596
Girl: Aïe! V: Oh, désolé! Pardon..

00:00:50.596 --> 00:00:53.236
Bienvenue à mon école, ce n'est pas pas l'école secondaire.

00:00:53.236 --> 00:00:55.089
C'est le Thunderdome.

00:00:55.089 --> 00:00:59.079
Retenez votre souffle, et compter les jours. Nous sommes diplômés bientôt.

00:00:59.079 --> 00:01:00.081
S: White trash!

00:01:00.081 --> 00:01:05.291
V: Collège sera le paradis si je ne suis pas mort en Juin!

00:01:05.728 --> 00:01:08.874
Mais je sais, je sais

00:01:08.874 --> 00:01:10.814
La vie peut être belle.

00:01:10.814 --> 00:01:15.500
Je prie, je prie pour une meilleure façon.

00:01:15.500 --> 00:01:20.353
Si nous avons changé à l'époque, nous pourrions changer à nouveau!

00:01:20.353 --> 00:01:23.793
Nous pouvons être belle.

00:01:24.226 --> 00:01:25.976
Boy: Aïe! V: Mais pas aujourd'hui.

00:01:26.726 --> 00:01:29.516
V: Hey, tu vas bien? Garçon: Evadez, ballot!

00:01:29.521 --> 00:01:30.541
V: ... Désolé.

00:01:30.647 --> 00:01:34.307
S: Freak! Salope! Cr * pple! Homo! HOMO! HOMO!

00:01:35.727 --> 00:01:40.887
Les choses vont s'améliorer dès que ma lettre vient de Harvard, Duke, ou Brown.

00:01:40.887 --> 00:01:45.337
Wake de ce coma, prenez mon diplôme, je peux sauter cette ville.

00:01:45.337 --> 00:01:49.770
Rêve des murs couverts de lierre et des cafés français de fumée.

00:01:49.779 --> 00:01:50.528
Boy: Regardez!

00:01:50.528 --> 00:01:55.318
V: Lutter contre l'envie de frapper un match et mettre ce feu de décharge!

00:01:55.945 --> 00:01:58.045
Ram: Oooooops!

00:01:59.717 --> 00:02:01.603
V: Ram Sweeney. 3e année comme secondeur,

00:02:01.603 --> 00:02:04.663
et l'année 8 fessée lunchtrays, et d'être un énorme DICK.

00:02:04.984 --> 00:02:08.424
R: Qu'est-ce que vous me dites, SKANK? V: Aah, rien.

00:02:09.062 --> 00:02:14.212
But I know, I know life can be beautiful!

00:02:14.212 --> 00:02:18.691
I pray, I pray for a better way.

00:02:18.691 --> 00:02:23.434
We were kind before, we can be kind once more!

00:02:23.434 --> 00:02:26.514
We can be beautiful....

00:02:27.394 --> 00:02:29.364
V: [screams] ..Hey Martha. Martha: Hey.

00:02:30.342 --> 00:02:33.655
V: Martha Dunstock. My best friends since diapers.

00:02:33.655 --> 00:02:37.135
She's got a HUGE heart, but... around here, that's not enough.

00:02:38.919 --> 00:02:39.944
[sighs] Thank you.

00:02:39.944 --> 00:02:42.497
M: We still on for movie night? V: Yeah, you're on Jiffy Pop detail.

00:02:42.497 --> 00:02:44.987
M: I rented The Princess Bride!

00:02:44.987 --> 00:02:46.287
V: [laughs]

00:02:46.287 --> 00:02:48.884
Wait, again? Don't you have it memorized by now?

00:02:48.884 --> 00:02:52.594
M: What can I say? I'm a sucker for a happy ending.

00:02:52.594 --> 00:02:57.644
Kurt: MARTHA DUMPTRUCK! WIDE LOAD! HONK. HAHAAA!

00:02:59.201 --> 00:03:00.955
V: Kurt Kelly. Quarterback.

00:03:00.955 --> 00:03:04.315
He is the smartest guy on the football team!

00:03:09.217 --> 00:03:11.447
Which is kind of like being the tallest dwarf.

00:03:11.447 --> 00:03:14.163
K: [laughs] Honk, hooonk! V: Hey, pick that up, right now!

00:03:14.163 --> 00:03:16.573
K: I'm sorry, are you actually TALKING to me?

00:03:16.581 --> 00:03:19.371
R: My buddy Kurt just asked you a question.

00:03:23.022 --> 00:03:25.757
V: Yes, I am. I wanna know what gives YOU the right to pick on MY friend.

00:03:25.757 --> 00:03:29.327
You're a high school has-been waiting to happen. A future gas station attendant.

00:03:31.264 --> 00:03:34.584
K: You have a zit right there. Students: [laughing]

00:03:34.871 --> 00:03:36.795
V: Dear diary, why?

00:03:36.795 --> 00:03:39.364
Boy: Why do they hate me? Girl: Why don't I fight back?

00:03:39.364 --> 00:03:41.250
K: Why do I act like such a creep?

00:03:41.250 --> 00:03:41.969
V: Why?

00:03:41.969 --> 00:03:44.246
M: Why won't he date me? R: Why did I hit him?

00:03:44.246 --> 00:03:46.232
S: Why do I cry myself to sleep?

00:03:46.232 --> 00:03:46.942
V: WHY?

00:03:46.942 --> 00:03:51.527
S: Somebody hug me! Somebody fix me! Somebody save me! Send me a sign, God!

00:03:51.527 --> 00:03:56.267
Give me some hope here! Something to live for!

00:04:13.705 --> 00:04:20.825
Aaah~! Heather! Heather! And Heather!

00:04:21.019 --> 00:04:24.349
V: And then there's the Heathers. They just... float above it all.

00:04:24.682 --> 00:04:31.786
S: I love Heather, Heather, and Heather!

00:04:31.786 --> 00:04:33.546
V: Heather McNamara, head cheerleader.

00:04:33.546 --> 00:04:37.011
Her dad is LOADED. He sells engagement rings.

00:04:39.018 --> 00:04:40.498
Heather Duke, runs the yearbook.

00:04:40.498 --> 00:04:43.648
No discernible personality, but her mom did pay for implants.

00:04:46.700 --> 00:04:49.520
And Heather Chandler, the almighty.

00:04:51.483 --> 00:04:54.443
She is a mythic bitch.

00:04:55.700 --> 00:04:59.800
They're solid teflon. Never bothered, never... harassed.

00:05:00.900 --> 00:05:03.040
I would give anything to be like that.

00:05:03.711 --> 00:05:06.881
S: Mmmm~ Boy: I'd like to be their boyfriend.

00:05:06.881 --> 00:05:08.562
S: That would be beautiful!

00:05:09.360 --> 00:05:11.789
Girl: If i sat at their table, guys would notice me!

00:05:11.789 --> 00:05:13.519
S: So beautiful!

00:05:13.939 --> 00:05:15.649
M: I'd like them to be nicer!

00:05:16.169 --> 00:05:18.019
S: That would be beautiful!

00:05:18.300 --> 00:05:21.400
Creepy dude: I'd like to kidnap a Heather and photograph her naked

00:05:21.400 --> 00:05:24.526
in an abandoned warehouse, and leave her tied up for the rats.

00:05:25.219 --> 00:05:28.379
(Editor's note: What the fuck.)

00:05:31.973 --> 00:05:33.783
H D.: [throwing up]

00:05:35.278 --> 00:05:38.490
H C.: Grow up, Heather. Bulimia is so '87.

00:05:38.490 --> 00:05:41.501
H M.: Heather's right, maybe you should see a doctor, Heather!

00:05:41.501 --> 00:05:43.432
H D.: Yeah, Heather. Maybe I should!

00:05:43.432 --> 00:05:45.299
Ms. Fleming: Ah, Heather and Heather.

00:05:45.299 --> 00:05:47.039
H D.: [vomits] F: And Heather.

00:05:48.169 --> 00:05:51.839
Perhaps you didn't hear the bell over all the vomiting? You're late for class.

00:05:51.839 --> 00:05:54.803
H C.: Heather wasn't feeling well. We're helping her.

00:05:54.803 --> 00:05:58.019
F: Not without a hall pass, you're not. Week's detention.

00:05:58.019 --> 00:05:59.258
V: Um, actually, Ms. Fleming!

00:05:59.258 --> 00:06:02.108
All 4 of us are out on a hall pass for yearbook committee.

00:06:06.101 --> 00:06:07.851
F: I see you're all listed....

00:06:08.928 --> 00:06:10.758
Hurry up, get where you're going.

00:06:14.173 --> 00:06:15.923
H C.: This is an excellent forgery.

00:06:16.211 --> 00:06:17.574
Who ARE you?

00:06:17.574 --> 00:06:20.884
V: Uh... Veronica! ..Sawyer! I, um, I.. I crave a boon.

00:06:21.201 --> 00:06:22.625
H C.: What boon?

00:06:22.625 --> 00:06:27.274
V: Um.. Let me sit at your table with you at lunch? Just once! No talking necessary.

00:06:27.274 --> 00:06:29.254
If people think that you guys tolerate me then they'll leave me alone.

00:06:29.254 --> 00:06:30.762
Heathers: [laugh]

00:06:30.762 --> 00:06:33.709
Before you answer, I also do report cards, permission slips, and absence notes.

00:06:33.709 --> 00:06:35.065
H D.: How 'bout prescriptions?

00:06:35.065 --> 00:06:37.315
H C.: Shut up, Heather. H D.: Sorry, Heather....

00:06:37.972 --> 00:06:42.172
H C.: For a greasy little nobody, you do have good bone structure.

00:06:42.899 --> 00:06:44.919
H M.: And a symmetrical face.

00:06:44.920 --> 00:06:49.840
If I took a meat cleaver down the center of your skull, I'd have matching halves.

00:06:50.885 --> 00:06:52.135
That's very important.

00:06:52.448 --> 00:06:54.938
H D.: Of course, you could stand to lose a few pounds.

00:06:55.456 --> 00:07:00.126
H C.: And you know, you know, you know this could be beautiful.

00:07:00.126 --> 00:07:04.626
Mascara, maybe some lip gloss, and we're on our way.

00:07:04.626 --> 00:07:08.997
Get this girl some blush, and Heather, I need your brush.

00:07:08.997 --> 00:07:10.949
Let's make her beautiful.

00:07:10.949 --> 00:07:13.729
H D.: Let's make her beautiful. H M.: Let's make her beautiful!

00:07:13.729 --> 00:07:17.199
H C.: MAKE HER BEAUTIFUL!

00:07:17.199 --> 00:07:18.167
H C.: Okay? V: Okay!

00:07:20.739 --> 00:07:23.290
Kurt: Out of my way, geek! Boy: I don't want trouble!

00:07:23.290 --> 00:07:25.420
Ram: You're gonna die at 3p.m.

00:07:25.728 --> 00:07:28.334
Girls: Don't you dare touch me, get away, pervert!

00:07:28.334 --> 00:07:30.354
Boy: What did I ever to to them?!

00:07:30.729 --> 00:07:34.246
Students: Who could survive this?! I can't escape this! I think I'm dying!

00:07:34.246 --> 00:07:35.616
Fleming: Who's that with Heather?

00:07:36.407 --> 00:07:37.097
S: WOAH!

00:07:39.201 --> 00:07:43.531
Heather, Heather, Heather,

00:07:44.284 --> 00:07:45.764
and someone!

00:07:45.958 --> 00:07:50.048
Heather, Heather, Heather,

00:07:50.735 --> 00:07:52.105
and a babe!

00:07:52.105 --> 00:07:55.783
Heather! Heather! Heather!

00:07:56.212 --> 00:07:57.272
Martha: Veronica?!

00:07:57.569 --> 00:08:03.039
S: Veronica! Veronica! VERONICA!

00:08:03.463 --> 00:08:09.661
V: And you know, you know, you know, life can be beautiful!

00:08:09.661 --> 00:08:15.051
You hope, you dream, you pray, and you get your way!

00:08:15.051 --> 00:08:20.638
Ask me how it feels lookin' like hell on wheels.

00:08:20.758 --> 00:08:22.398
My God, it's beautiful.

00:08:22.398 --> 00:08:23.798
S: Beautiful!

00:08:24.264 --> 00:08:27.699
V: I might be beautiful!

00:08:27.699 --> 00:08:31.519
And when you're beautiful,

00:08:31.936 --> 00:08:33.960
it's a beautiful frickin' day!

00:08:33.960 --> 00:08:38.232
S: Heather! Heather! Heather! VERONICA!

00:08:38.232 --> 00:08:42.403
V: YEA-EA-EEAAAH

00:08:42.403 --> 00:08:47.232
S: Veronica! Veronica! Veronica! Veronica!

00:08:47.232 --> 00:08:53.032
VERONICA!

00:09:04.482 --> 00:09:09.282
Dear diary, It's been 3 weeks since I became friends with the Heathers.

00:09:10.002 --> 00:09:11.042
[laughs]

00:09:11.133 --> 00:09:14.368
Actually, "friends" isn't exactly the right word. It's more like, um,

00:09:14.368 --> 00:09:19.268
The Heathers are people who I work with, and our job is being popular and shit.

00:09:22.218 --> 00:09:23.590
M: Hey Veronica! V: Hey!

00:09:23.590 --> 00:09:25.810
M: You really do look beautiful these days

00:09:25.810 --> 00:09:28.570
V: Aww, thank you, but, it's still the same me, underneath.

00:09:28.822 --> 00:09:30.092
M: Are you sure?

00:09:30.092 --> 00:09:33.989
V: Oh, look, um... I'm really sorry that I flaked on movie night last week.

00:09:33.989 --> 00:09:35.764
I've just.. I've had a LOT going on.

00:09:35.764 --> 00:09:36.524
M: I get that!

00:09:36.524 --> 00:09:39.794
You're with the Heathers now! That's exciting.

00:09:40.424 --> 00:09:42.715
V: It's whatever, but we'll hang soon, I promise!

00:09:42.715 --> 00:09:43.535
H D.: VERONICA!

00:09:44.219 --> 00:09:47.559
Heather says to haul ass to the table, pronto.

00:09:47.565 --> 00:09:48.285
V: How very.

00:09:51.186 --> 00:09:54.371
H C.: Veronica! I need a forgery in Ram Sweeney's handwriting.

00:09:54.371 --> 00:09:57.011
You'll need something to write on. Heather, bend over!

00:10:00.395 --> 00:10:01.805
"Hello, beautiful!

00:10:02.254 --> 00:10:05.808
I've been watching you, and thinking about us in the old days!

00:10:05.808 --> 00:10:09.522
I hope you can come to my homecoming party this weekend!

00:10:09.522 --> 00:10:11.792
Miss you, Ram."

00:10:11.797 --> 00:10:14.496
[gasps] Put an "XO" after the signature!

00:10:14.496 --> 00:10:15.969
V: What's this for, anyway?

00:10:15.969 --> 00:10:19.193
H C.: I just found out that Ram used to hang with Marth Dumptruck.

00:10:19.193 --> 00:10:21.773
V: Well... [scoffs] yeah, in kindergarten. We all did.

00:10:21.776 --> 00:10:24.644
H D.: We all didn't kiss on the kickball field!

00:10:24.644 --> 00:10:28.330
H M.: Oh, that's right, I remember! Ram kissed Martha Dumptruck!

00:10:28.330 --> 00:10:29.574
It was disgusting!

00:10:29.574 --> 00:10:30.504
H C.: Perfect!

00:10:30.834 --> 00:10:33.152
K: It'd be so righteous to be in the middle of a

00:10:33.152 --> 00:10:36.343
Heather Chandler-Veronica Sawyer sandwich.

00:10:36.343 --> 00:10:38.013
R: Hell yeah. Punch it in!

00:10:38.974 --> 00:10:39.784
H C.: Ram!

00:10:43.675 --> 00:10:46.832
Be a sweetie and give this note to Martha Dumptruck for me?

00:10:46.832 --> 00:10:47.780
V: What?! No!

00:10:47.780 --> 00:10:49.732
R: Since when do you talk to that lardass?

00:10:49.732 --> 00:10:50.885
H C.: Oh, don't read it!

00:10:50.885 --> 00:10:54.786
She's having an extra heavy flow, and wanted some advice from my gyno.

00:10:54.786 --> 00:10:55.776
K: EW, GROSS!

00:10:56.534 --> 00:10:57.773
H C.: What are you doing?!

00:10:57.773 --> 00:11:00.469
V: Please don't do this, okay? Not to Martha.

00:11:00.469 --> 00:11:04.489
H D.: WHAT? It'll give her shower nozzle masturbation material for weeks.

00:11:04.489 --> 00:11:06.922
H C.: SHUT UP, HEATHER! H D.: Sorry, Heather!

00:11:11.366 --> 00:11:14.555
V: Martha has had a thing for Ram for like 12 years now, ok? This...

00:11:14.555 --> 00:11:17.405
V: This would kill her-- H C.: Are we gonna have a problem?!

00:11:17.406 --> 00:11:19.026
You got a bone to pick?

00:11:19.470 --> 00:11:23.240
You've come so far, why now are you pulling on my dick?!

00:11:23.722 --> 00:11:27.062
I'd normally slap your face off, and everyone here could watch!

00:11:27.469 --> 00:11:29.533
But I'm feeling nice. Here's some advice:

00:11:29.533 --> 00:11:31.303
LISTEN UP, BIOTCH.

00:11:31.986 --> 00:11:35.296
Kurt and Ram: [cheering]

00:11:38.296 --> 00:11:39.110
D&M: I LIKE

00:11:39.110 --> 00:11:41.771
C: Lookin' hot, buyin' stuff they cannot!

00:11:41.771 --> 00:11:42.707
D&M: I LIKE

00:11:42.707 --> 00:11:45.032
C: Drinkin' hard, maxin' dad's credit card!

00:11:45.032 --> 00:11:46.193
D&M: I LIKE

00:11:46.193 --> 00:11:48.697
C: Skippin' gym, scarin' her, screwin' him!

00:11:48.697 --> 00:11:49.605
D&M: I LIKE

00:11:49.605 --> 00:11:52.085
C: Killer clothes, All: KICKIN' NERDS IN THE NOSE!

00:11:52.474 --> 00:11:56.044
C: If you lack the balls, you can go play dolls.

00:11:56.044 --> 00:11:58.398
Let your mommy fix you a snack!

00:11:59.208 --> 00:12:02.648
Or you could come smoke, pound some rum and coke,

00:12:02.648 --> 00:12:05.373
in my Porsche with the quarterback.

00:12:05.373 --> 00:12:07.903
D&M: WO-OAH! WO-OAH! WO-OAH!

00:12:08.468 --> 00:12:11.284
All: Honey, whatcha waitin' for?

00:12:11.604 --> 00:12:14.817
Welcome to my candy store!

00:12:14.817 --> 00:12:20.737
Time for you to prove you're not a loser anymore!

00:12:20.737 --> 00:12:24.247
And step into my candy store.

00:12:24.247 --> 00:12:25.989
All: GUYS FALL D: at your feet.

00:12:25.989 --> 00:12:27.661
D: Pay the check, M: help you cheat.

00:12:27.661 --> 00:12:29.310
All: ALL YOU D: have to do,

00:12:29.310 --> 00:12:31.258
C: Say goodbye to Shamu!

00:12:31.258 --> 00:12:34.558
All: THAT FREAK'S M: not your friend, I can tell in the end,

00:12:34.559 --> 00:12:36.356
All: IF SHE D: had your shot,

00:12:36.356 --> 00:12:38.234
All: SHE WOULD LEAVE YOU TO ROT!

00:12:38.234 --> 00:12:41.778
M: 'Course if you don't care, Fine! Go braid her hair!

00:12:41.778 --> 00:12:44.488
Maybe Sesame Street is on!

00:12:45.209 --> 00:12:48.526
M: Or forget that creep, D: and get in my Jeep.

00:12:48.526 --> 00:12:51.223
C: Let's go tear up someone's lawn!

00:12:51.223 --> 00:12:53.803
All: WO-OAH! WO-OAH! WO-OAH!

00:12:54.241 --> 00:12:57.271
Honey, whatcha waitin' for?

00:12:57.736 --> 00:13:00.516
Welcome to my candy store!

00:13:00.859 --> 00:13:06.524
You just gotta prove you're not a pussy anymore.

00:13:06.524 --> 00:13:11.353
And step into my candy store!

00:13:11.353 --> 00:13:14.674
C: You can join the team, D&M: or you can bitch and moan!

00:13:14.674 --> 00:13:18.214
C: You can live the dream, D&M: or you can DIE ALONE!

00:13:18.214 --> 00:13:21.270
C: You can fly with eagles, All: or if you prefer,

00:13:21.270 --> 00:13:25.050
C: keep on testing me, All: and end up like HER!

00:13:25.055 --> 00:13:28.216
M: Veronica, look! Ram invited me to his homecoming party!

00:13:28.216 --> 00:13:30.810
See, I TOLD you there was still something there!

00:13:30.810 --> 00:13:32.800
This proves he's been thinking about me.

00:13:35.994 --> 00:13:37.093
V: Color me stoked.

00:13:37.093 --> 00:13:39.503
M: I'm so happy! [giggles]

00:13:39.507 --> 00:13:43.617
D: OOH, WO-O-OAH! HONEY, WHATCHA WAITIN' FO--

00:13:43.618 --> 00:13:45.335
C: SHUT UP, HEATHER!

00:13:45.335 --> 00:13:53.925
Step into my candy store!

00:13:54.214 --> 00:13:56.341
D&M: Step into my candy store!

00:13:56.341 --> 00:13:59.705
All: It's my candy store, it's my candy...

00:13:59.705 --> 00:14:03.020
IT'S MY CANDY STORE, IT'S MY CANDY...

00:14:03.020 --> 00:14:05.075
IT'S MY CANDY STORE,

00:14:05.075 --> 00:14:09.525
IT'S MY CANDY STORE!

00:14:17.714 --> 00:14:21.544
???: You shouldn't have bowed down to the swatch dogs and Diet Coke heads.

00:14:22.776 --> 00:14:24.336
They're gonna crush that girl.

00:14:24.783 --> 00:14:25.803
V: I'm sorry, what?

00:14:26.971 --> 00:14:29.191
???: Clearly, you've got a soul.

00:14:29.192 --> 00:14:31.622
You just gotta work harder on keeping it clean.

00:14:32.210 --> 00:14:33.868
"We're all born marked for evil."

00:14:33.868 --> 00:14:37.518
V: Um, okay. Don't just quote Baudelaire at me and then walk away, excuse me.

00:14:39.380 --> 00:14:40.820
I didn't catch your name.

00:14:41.372 --> 00:14:42.812
???: I didn't throw it.

00:14:50.679 --> 00:14:54.549
K: Who's that guy in the jacket think he is anyway, Bo Diddley?

00:14:56.474 --> 00:14:58.990
R: Veronica's into his act, no doubt.

00:14:58.990 --> 00:15:00.480
K: LET'S KICK HIS ASS.

00:15:00.480 --> 00:15:03.276
R: No, we're seniors, man. We're too old for that shit.

00:15:03.276 --> 00:15:04.526
K: HEY, SWEETHEART!

00:15:04.802 --> 00:15:09.722
What'd your boyfriend say when you told 'im you were movin' to Sherwood, Ohioooo?

00:15:10.727 --> 00:15:13.536
R: My buddy Kurt just asked you a question

00:15:13.536 --> 00:15:17.056
K: Hey Ram, doesn't the cafeteria have a "No F*gs Allowed" rule?

00:15:17.556 --> 00:15:20.696
???: They seem to have an open door policy for assholes, though.

00:15:23.221 --> 00:15:24.321
R: Hold his arms.

00:15:27.724 --> 00:15:29.033
Students: HOLY SHIT!

00:15:29.033 --> 00:15:30.288
HOLY SHIT!

00:15:30.288 --> 00:15:36.468
HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIIIIT!

00:15:53.018 --> 00:15:57.018
V: Why, when you see boys fight, does it look so horrible, yet...

00:15:57.570 --> 00:15:59.790
feel so riiiight?!

00:16:00.147 --> 00:16:03.024
I shouldn't watch this crap, that's not who I am.

00:16:03.024 --> 00:16:04.354
But with this kid...

00:16:05.452 --> 00:16:08.582
Daaaaamn.

00:16:10.229 --> 00:16:11.089
Hey,

00:16:11.089 --> 00:16:13.017
Mr. No Name Kid,

00:16:13.959 --> 00:16:15.869
so who might you be?

00:16:16.635 --> 00:16:20.415
And could you fight for me?

00:16:20.415 --> 00:16:21.432
And hey,

00:16:21.996 --> 00:16:24.006
could you face the crowd?

00:16:24.611 --> 00:16:30.905
Could you be seen with me, and still act proud?

00:16:30.905 --> 00:16:31.777
[laughs]

00:16:31.777 --> 00:16:35.241
Hey, could you hold my hand?

00:16:35.241 --> 00:16:41.602
And could you carry me through No Man's Land?

00:16:41.602 --> 00:16:42.752
It's fine...

00:16:43.471 --> 00:16:45.301
if you don't agree.

00:16:45.955 --> 00:16:49.766
But I would fight for you,

00:16:49.766 --> 00:16:57.327
if you would fight for me.

00:16:57.327 --> 00:17:02.295
Let them drive us underground.

00:17:02.295 --> 00:17:07.015
I don't care how far.

00:17:07.020 --> 00:17:11.253
You can set my broken bones,

00:17:11.253 --> 00:17:14.144
and I know CPR.

00:17:16.240 --> 00:17:17.694
Well, woah.

00:17:17.694 --> 00:17:19.784
You can punch real good....

00:17:20.377 --> 00:17:27.445
You've lasted longer than I thought you would. So hey,

00:17:27.445 --> 00:17:29.941
Mr. No Name Kid,

00:17:29.941 --> 00:17:39.513
if some night you're free,

00:17:39.513 --> 00:17:46.294
wanna fight for me?

00:17:46.294 --> 00:17:50.734
If you're still alive,

00:17:50.734 --> 00:17:55.474
I would fight for you,

00:17:55.474 --> 00:18:06.275
if you would fight for me!

00:18:14.746 --> 00:18:16.766
K: MAN, THAT SUCKED!

00:18:17.982 --> 00:18:21.062
That kid fights better than the real Bo Diddley.

00:18:22.436 --> 00:18:24.729
R: Hey, have you ever seen Enter The Dragon?

00:18:24.729 --> 00:18:28.769
Bo Diddley fights with his shirt off, and is like pretty ripped for [redacted] dude.

00:18:28.769 --> 00:18:29.712
K: F*g!

00:18:29.712 --> 00:18:30.734
R: SHUT UP!

00:18:30.734 --> 00:18:33.261
K: RAM'S EATING CHINESE TONIGHT!

00:18:33.261 --> 00:18:34.781
R: SHUT UP, DUDE!

00:18:35.480 --> 00:18:37.820
(Editor's Note: I hate them so much.)

00:18:39.742 --> 00:18:42.512
H C.: God, Veronica. Drool much?

00:18:42.512 --> 00:18:45.730
You were totally throwing your panties at that new kid.

00:18:45.730 --> 00:18:47.520
D&M: [laugh weakly]

00:18:48.151 --> 00:18:52.831
H C.: And judging by your house, you can't afford replacement panties!

00:18:54.396 --> 00:18:56.406
D&M: [laugh weakly]

00:18:56.877 --> 00:18:59.557
V: Come on, I-I don't even know his name. H C.: [scoffs]

00:19:01.159 --> 00:19:03.261
Mr. and Mrs. Sawyer, watch out!

00:19:03.261 --> 00:19:04.321
Mrs. Sawyer: Oh!

00:19:04.977 --> 00:19:06.857
Haha, there you go, girls!

00:19:07.663 --> 00:19:09.203
Care for some pâté?

00:19:10.174 --> 00:19:13.024
H C.: That is not pâté, it's liverwurst.

00:19:13.467 --> 00:19:16.509
Mrs.S: Aha... I'm aware of that, Heather!

00:19:16.509 --> 00:19:18.119
It's a family joke!

00:19:19.208 --> 00:19:21.558
H C.: Oh... funny....

00:19:23.219 --> 00:19:27.179
Mr.S: Damnit. Will somebody please tell me why I read this spy crap?

00:19:27.179 --> 00:19:29.049
V: Oh, because you're an idiot, Dad.

00:19:30.345 --> 00:19:33.505
Mr.S: Oh yeah. That's it.

00:19:33.740 --> 00:19:38.843
Sawyers: [all laugh]

00:19:38.843 --> 00:19:41.007
Mrs.S: So girls, any big plans for tonight?

00:19:41.007 --> 00:19:43.245
V: Yeah! There's a big homecoming party at Ram Sweeney's house,

00:19:43.245 --> 00:19:45.047
so I'm gonna catch a ride with Heather.

00:19:45.047 --> 00:19:46.067
H C.: Speaking of which...

00:19:47.733 --> 00:19:49.024
V: Ok, uh...

00:19:50.394 --> 00:19:51.504
Great pâté, Mom, but

00:19:51.504 --> 00:19:53.884
I gotta motor if we wanna be ready for this party.

00:19:53.884 --> 00:19:56.159
Mrs.S: Don't let these popular girls change you.

00:19:56.159 --> 00:19:57.097
V: I need them.

00:19:57.097 --> 00:20:00.037
Mrs.S: What for? You have other friends! You have Martha.

00:20:00.037 --> 00:20:01.484
V: Well...

00:20:01.484 --> 00:20:04.549
Maybe I want more out of life than liverwurst, Mom....

00:20:07.683 --> 00:20:09.783
Mr.S: Those girls seem really nice.

00:20:10.948 --> 00:20:13.234
Heathers: SO STEP INTO MY CANDY STORE!

00:20:13.234 --> 00:20:19.544
It's my candy store, it's my candy... it's my candy store, it's my candy...

00:20:19.544 --> 00:20:21.519
It's my candy store,

00:20:21.519 --> 00:20:26.269
IT'S MY CANDY STORE!

00:20:31.968 --> 00:20:36.748
H C.: [honking horn] VERONICA! DON'T FORGET THE CORN NUTS!

00:20:36.748 --> 00:20:39.315
IT'S NOT A PARTY WITHOUT CORN NUTS!

00:20:39.315 --> 00:20:41.291
V: Um, BQ or plain?

00:20:41.291 --> 00:20:42.561
H C.: BQ!!!

00:20:47.983 --> 00:20:49.797
???: Greetings and salutations.

00:20:49.797 --> 00:20:51.267
You want a Slurpee with that?

00:20:51.725 --> 00:20:54.602
V: No, but if you're nice, I'll let you buy me a Big Gulp.

00:20:54.602 --> 00:20:57.332
???: That's like going to Mickey D's and ordering a salad.

00:20:57.332 --> 00:20:59.396
Slurpee's the signature dish of the house.

00:20:59.396 --> 00:21:01.926
???: Did you say cherry or lime? V: I said "Big Gulp".

00:21:03.656 --> 00:21:05.396
I'm Veronica, by the way.

00:21:05.396 --> 00:21:07.474
Are you ever gonna.. tell me.. your name?

00:21:07.474 --> 00:21:09.222
???: I'll end the suspense.

00:21:09.222 --> 00:21:11.272
Jason Dean. JD for short.

00:21:13.454 --> 00:21:14.524
V: JD.

00:21:14.952 --> 00:21:17.902
That thing you pulled in the Caf was pretty severe.

00:21:17.902 --> 00:21:20.639
JD: Well, the extreme always seems to make an impression.

00:21:21.157 --> 00:21:21.917
V: [laughs]

00:21:24.713 --> 00:21:29.233
So what's a Baudelaire-quoting badass like you doing in Sherwood, Ohio?

00:21:29.644 --> 00:21:30.964
JD: My dad's work.

00:21:30.964 --> 00:21:33.736
He owns a... a deconstruction company.

00:21:33.736 --> 00:21:35.390
V: "De-construction"?

00:21:35.390 --> 00:21:38.010
JD: The old man seems to enjoy tearing things down.

00:21:38.011 --> 00:21:40.388
You seen the commercial: "My name's Big Bud Dean!

00:21:40.388 --> 00:21:43.100
If it's in the way, I'll make your day!"

00:21:43.100 --> 00:21:48.151
V: [laughs] And then he pushes the plunger and the screen blows up.

00:21:48.151 --> 00:21:49.811
[laughs]

00:21:51.209 --> 00:21:53.119
[clears throat] That's your dad?

00:21:54.125 --> 00:21:56.522
JD: In all his semi-psychotic glory.

00:21:56.522 --> 00:21:58.942
V: Yeah, well... everyone's life has got static.

00:21:58.942 --> 00:22:05.551
H C.: [honks horn] VERONICAAAAAAAAAAA!

00:22:08.320 --> 00:22:10.800
V: Example: I don't really like my friends.

00:22:10.800 --> 00:22:12.850
JD: I don't really like your friends either!

00:22:13.265 --> 00:22:14.605
Bag the party, 'n..

00:22:14.605 --> 00:22:15.495
hang here.

00:22:15.495 --> 00:22:16.495
V: Ohh~

00:22:17.426 --> 00:22:20.736
7/11. Swanky first date.

00:22:20.736 --> 00:22:23.927
JD: Hey... I love this place.

00:22:23.927 --> 00:22:26.361
V: No offense, but... why?

00:22:26.691 --> 00:22:28.741
JD: I've been through 10 high schools.

00:22:28.741 --> 00:22:30.459
They start to get blurry.

00:22:30.459 --> 00:22:33.879
No point planting roots, 'cause you're gone in a hurry.

00:22:33.879 --> 00:22:40.279
My dad keeps 2 suitcases packed in the den so it's only a matter of when.

00:22:41.669 --> 00:22:45.219
I don't learn their names, don't bother with faces.

00:22:45.668 --> 00:22:48.808
All I can trust is this concrete oasis.

00:22:49.177 --> 00:22:52.335
Seems every time I'm about to despair,

00:22:52.335 --> 00:22:56.286
there's a 7/11 right there.

00:22:56.286 --> 00:23:00.259
Each store is the same, from Las Vegas to Boston.

00:23:00.259 --> 00:23:03.949
Linoleum aisles that I love to get lost in

00:23:03.949 --> 00:23:07.259
I pray at my altar of slush.

00:23:07.259 --> 00:23:11.909
Yeah, I live for that sweet frozen rush.

00:23:15.423 --> 00:23:16.093
Ah!

00:23:18.662 --> 00:23:22.722
Freeze your brain.

00:23:22.722 --> 00:23:26.348
Suck on that straw, get lost in the pain.

00:23:26.348 --> 00:23:29.991
Happiness comes when everything numbs.

00:23:29.991 --> 00:23:33.315
Who needs cocaine?

00:23:33.315 --> 00:23:37.015
Freeze your brain.

00:23:37.044 --> 00:23:40.824
Freeze your brain.

00:23:41.447 --> 00:23:42.487
Care for a hit?

00:23:42.792 --> 00:23:45.202
V: Does your mommy know that you eat all that crap?

00:23:45.202 --> 00:23:46.421
JD: Not anymore.

00:23:46.421 --> 00:23:50.391
When mom was alive, we lived halfway normal.

00:23:50.394 --> 00:23:53.806
Now it's just me and my dad, we're less formal.

00:23:53.806 --> 00:23:57.250
I learned to cook pasta, I learned to pay rent.

00:23:57.250 --> 00:24:00.800
Learned the world doesn't owe you a cent.

00:24:00.800 --> 00:24:04.426
You're planning that future, Veronica Sawyer.

00:24:04.426 --> 00:24:08.004
You'll go to some college, and marry a lawyer!

00:24:08.004 --> 00:24:11.464
But the sky's gonna hurt when it falls,

00:24:11.464 --> 00:24:16.050
so you better start building some walls!

00:24:16.450 --> 00:24:20.010
Freeze your brain!

00:24:20.010 --> 00:24:23.243
Swim in the ice, get lost in the pain!

00:24:23.243 --> 00:24:26.521
Shut your eyes tight, 'til you vanish from sight.

00:24:26.811 --> 00:24:30.514
Let nothing remain!

00:24:30.514 --> 00:24:34.209
Freeze your brain!

00:24:34.209 --> 00:24:37.443
Shatter your skull, fight pain with more pain!

00:24:37.443 --> 00:24:40.960
Forget who you are. Unburden your load.

00:24:40.960 --> 00:24:44.205
Forget in six weeks, you'll be back on the road.

00:24:44.205 --> 00:24:47.499
When the voice in your head says "you're better off dead",

00:24:47.499 --> 00:24:52.769
don't open a vein!

00:24:56.950 --> 00:25:01.992
Just freeze your brain.

00:25:01.992 --> 00:25:06.212
Freeze your brain.

00:25:06.212 --> 00:25:10.426
Go on and freeze your brain.

00:25:11.680 --> 00:25:12.560
Try it.

00:25:23.263 --> 00:25:24.694
V: Yeah I don't.. really see--

00:25:24.694 --> 00:25:26.094
OH! SON OF A BITCH!

00:25:27.170 --> 00:25:29.580
Ow. Ah, ahh...

00:25:30.029 --> 00:25:30.858
H C.: Veronica!

00:25:30.858 --> 00:25:32.278
V: Oh, God! I-I gotta go.

00:25:32.278 --> 00:25:33.083
JD: So I see.

00:25:33.083 --> 00:25:33.895
H C.: Corn Nuts?!

00:25:33.895 --> 00:25:35.505
V: They're right here. I'm sorry.

00:25:35.505 --> 00:25:38.393
H C.: Wave bye-bye to Red Dawn here and let's MOTOR.

00:25:39.915 --> 00:25:40.795
V: Sorry....

00:25:57.432 --> 00:25:59.979
Mr. Sweeney: Okay Ram, have fun tonight, but I expect you to act your age.

00:25:59.979 --> 00:26:02.537
If the neighbors complain about the noise, Paul and I are gonna march in here

00:26:02.537 --> 00:26:04.777
and knock the sand out of your vagina, you understand me?

00:26:05.734 --> 00:26:07.201
Ram: Dude, what am I, like 5?

00:26:07.201 --> 00:26:08.978
Mr.S: I'm your dad, not your dude!

00:26:08.978 --> 00:26:10.300
Mr. Kelly: That goes double for you, Kurt.

00:26:10.300 --> 00:26:13.310
You're a guest in Bill's house, and you will treat it with respect.

00:26:13.316 --> 00:26:14.286
K: Sure thing!

00:26:14.611 --> 00:26:17.234
Dude. K&R: [both laugh]

00:26:17.234 --> 00:26:18.513
Mr.K: Hold his arms.

00:26:18.513 --> 00:26:19.764
K: Oh, I'm just kidding!

00:26:19.764 --> 00:26:21.554
Mr.K: Who's a great big sissy?

00:26:22.364 --> 00:26:25.314
Whos going to prom in a bright pink dress? Mr.S: You are!

00:26:25.318 --> 00:26:26.778
Mr.K: WHO'S A GREAT BIG SISSY?

00:26:26.778 --> 00:26:28.659
K: I AM A GREAT BIG SISSY.

00:26:28.659 --> 00:26:29.609
Mr.K: Alright.

00:26:30.259 --> 00:26:31.526
Enjoy the party, son!

00:26:31.526 --> 00:26:32.396
Mr.S: Punch it in!

00:26:35.141 --> 00:26:36.541
LOOK OUT, IT'S A CLAW!

00:26:41.540 --> 00:26:43.130
K: Man, that sucked.

00:26:43.138 --> 00:26:44.688
R: Who cares, dude?!

00:26:44.689 --> 00:26:48.329
The parents are gone and I got my party slippers on!

00:26:53.130 --> 00:26:57.268
Dad says "act our age". You heard the man, it's time to rage!

00:26:57.268 --> 00:26:59.264
Students: BLAST THE BASS, BURN OUT THE LIGHT.

00:26:59.264 --> 00:27:01.024
AIN'T NOBODY HOME TONIGHT!

00:27:01.031 --> 00:27:05.271
R: Drink, smoke, it's all cool. Let's get naked in my pool!

00:27:05.271 --> 00:27:09.270
S: PUNCH THE WALL, AND START A FIGHT. AIN'T NOBODY HOME TONIGHT!

00:27:09.270 --> 00:27:13.529
K: His folks got a water bed. Come upstairs and rest your head.

00:27:13.529 --> 00:27:17.729
R: Let's rub each others' backs while watchin' porn on Cinemax!

00:27:18.970 --> 00:27:22.732
S: THE FOLKS ARE GONE, IT'S TIME FOR BIG FUN.

00:27:22.732 --> 00:27:23.592
BIG FUN!

00:27:23.598 --> 00:27:26.781
WE'RE UP 'TIL DAWN, HAVIN' SOME BIG FUN.

00:27:26.781 --> 00:27:27.640
BIG FUN!

00:27:27.640 --> 00:27:31.578
When mom and dad forget to lock the liquor cabinet,

00:27:31.578 --> 00:27:33.748
It's big fun. Big fun!

00:27:33.748 --> 00:27:35.429
BIG FUN!

00:27:35.429 --> 00:27:36.279
WOO~!

00:27:36.544 --> 00:27:40.642
V: Okay. Ok ok, so it's salt, and then lime... and then SHOT!

00:27:40.642 --> 00:27:42.176
H M.: No, it's salt, then shot--

00:27:42.176 --> 00:27:43.681
H C.: YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG.

00:27:43.681 --> 00:27:44.511
V: Wait, really?!

00:27:44.511 --> 00:27:45.621
Because I feel great!

00:27:47.423 --> 00:27:49.783
Guy: Veronica! You are lookin' GOOD tonight.

00:27:51.670 --> 00:27:52.508
V: WOAH.

00:27:52.508 --> 00:27:56.755
A hot guy smiled at me, without a trace of mockery!

00:27:56.755 --> 00:28:00.504
S: Everyone's high as a kite. Ain't nobody home tonight!

00:28:00.504 --> 00:28:04.979
V: Zoned, stoned, I should quit. Hey, is that weed?? I want a hit!

00:28:04.979 --> 00:28:08.738
S: Fill that joint, and roll it tight. Ain't nobody home tonight!

00:28:08.738 --> 00:28:12.586
V: Dreams are comin' true, when people laugh, but not at you!

00:28:12.586 --> 00:28:15.051
I'm not alone, I'm not afraid!

00:28:15.051 --> 00:28:18.491
I feel like Bono at Live Aid!

00:28:18.491 --> 00:28:22.463
S: THE HOUSE IS OURS! IT'S TIME FOR BIG FUN.

00:28:22.463 --> 00:28:23.371
BIG FUN!

00:28:23.371 --> 00:28:26.488
LET'S USE THEIR SHOWERS, THAT SOUNDS LIKE BIG FUN.

00:28:26.488 --> 00:28:27.432
BIG FUN!

00:28:27.432 --> 00:28:29.486
CRACK OPEN ONE MORE CASE.

00:28:29.486 --> 00:28:31.692
V: I think that's what they call "third base".

00:28:31.692 --> 00:28:34.702
S: BIG FUN! BIG FUN. BIG FUN!

00:28:34.702 --> 00:28:36.756
V: That actually looks like All: BIG FUN.

00:28:36.756 --> 00:28:39.146
BIG FUN. BIG FUN!

00:28:39.146 --> 00:28:40.136
WOO~!

00:28:40.136 --> 00:28:42.228
K: ALRIGHT EVERYBODY, LISTEN UP!

00:28:42.228 --> 00:28:46.267
WHAT'S WESTERBURG GONNA DO TO THE RAZORBACKS AT SUNDAY'S GAME?!

00:28:46.267 --> 00:28:49.133
R: Gonna make 'em go "Wee! Wee! Wee! Wee!"

00:28:49.133 --> 00:28:51.245
S: BIG FUN. BIG FUN!

00:28:51.245 --> 00:28:53.192
H D.: Way to show maturity!

00:28:53.192 --> 00:28:55.119
S: BIG FUN. BIG FUN!

00:28:55.119 --> 00:28:57.107
Quick it, jackass, GET OFF OF ME!

00:28:57.107 --> 00:28:59.354
BIG FUN. BIG FUN!

00:28:59.354 --> 00:29:00.795
V: Yo, Ram! Emergency.

00:29:00.795 --> 00:29:03.411
I just saw some freshmen sneaking over the pool fence.

00:29:03.411 --> 00:29:07.271
R: I hate freshmen! Where are you little pricks?! I'M COMING FOR YOU!

00:29:07.703 --> 00:29:08.773
V: Hey, are you ok?

00:29:08.773 --> 00:29:10.803
H D.: I didn't need your help!

00:29:10.803 --> 00:29:14.214
V: Aww, thanks Heather, but I don't really have to vomit right now.

00:29:14.214 --> 00:29:15.784
Get it? 'Cause the finger? [laughs]

00:29:16.476 --> 00:29:20.238
S: THE PARTY'S HOT, HOT, HOT! IT'S TIME FOR BIG FUN.

00:29:20.238 --> 00:29:21.312
BIG FUN!

00:29:21.312 --> 00:29:22.565
K: YOU NEED A JELLO SHOT!

00:29:22.565 --> 00:29:25.311
S: WE'RE HAVIN' BIG FUN. BIG FUN!

00:29:25.311 --> 00:29:27.237
H C.: Martha Dumptruck, in the flesh.

00:29:27.237 --> 00:29:29.527
H D.: Here comes the cootie squad! We should--

00:29:29.528 --> 00:29:31.478
H C.: SHUT UP, HEATHER! H D.: Sorry, Heather!

00:29:31.478 --> 00:29:33.543
H M.: Look who's with her! Oh my god.

00:29:33.543 --> 00:29:37.883
Heathers: Dang dang, diggity dang-a-dang. Dang dang, diggity dang-a-dang!

00:29:37.883 --> 00:29:40.750
V: I can't believe you actually came. M: It's exciting, right?!

00:29:40.750 --> 00:29:43.514
Oh, uh, excuse me. I wanna say hello to Ram.

00:29:43.514 --> 00:29:46.922
I brought sparkling cider! [giggles]

00:29:46.922 --> 00:29:47.755
V: Martha...!

00:29:47.755 --> 00:29:51.505
H C.: Showing up here took some guts. Time to rip 'em out.

00:29:51.505 --> 00:29:55.518
H D.: Well who's this pig remind you of? Especially the snout. HA!

00:29:55.518 --> 00:29:59.996
Hs: Dang dang, diggity dang-a-dang. Dang dang, diggity dang-a-dang!

00:29:59.996 --> 00:30:01.760
R: Where the hell are those freshmen?!

00:30:01.760 --> 00:30:03.017
M: Um.. hi Ram!

00:30:03.017 --> 00:30:07.295
Uh, I wasn't gonna come but... since you took the time to write that sweet note....

00:30:07.295 --> 00:30:08.305
R: What note?

00:30:08.923 --> 00:30:11.249
Why do you gotta be weird all the time?

00:30:11.249 --> 00:30:14.049
People wouldn't hate you so much if you acted normal.

00:30:15.220 --> 00:30:18.010
[spitting]

00:30:18.570 --> 00:30:20.800
There's no alcohol in here!

00:30:20.800 --> 00:30:22.800
Are you trying to poison me?

00:30:23.965 --> 00:30:28.258
S: Dang dang, diggity dang-a-dang. Dang dang, diggity dang-a-dang!

00:30:28.258 --> 00:30:31.270
Dang dang, diggity dang-a-dang, DIGGITY DANG-A-DANG!

00:30:31.270 --> 00:30:35.005
THE FOLKS ARE GONE! IT'S TIME FOR BIG FUN.

00:30:35.005 --> 00:30:35.899
BIG FUN!

00:30:35.899 --> 00:30:39.019
WE'RE UP 'TIL DAWN, HAVIN' SOME BIG FUN.

00:30:39.019 --> 00:30:39.980
BIG FUN!

00:30:39.980 --> 00:30:44.049
SO LET THE SPEAKERS BLOW, THEY'LL BUY ANOTHER STEREO!

00:30:44.049 --> 00:30:48.260
OUR FOLKS GOT NO CLUE 'BOUT ALL THE SHIT THEIR CHILDREN DO!

00:30:48.260 --> 00:30:52.090
WHY ARE THEY SURPRISED WHENEVER WE'RE UNSUPERVISED,

00:30:52.090 --> 00:30:53.494
IT'S BIG FUN.

00:30:53.494 --> 00:30:54.246
BIG FUN!

00:30:54.246 --> 00:30:55.236
BIG FUN.

00:30:55.236 --> 00:30:56.253
BIG FUN!

00:30:56.253 --> 00:30:57.261
BIG FUN.

00:30:57.261 --> 00:31:00.251
BIG FUUUUN!

00:31:00.251 --> 00:31:01.531
WOO~!

00:31:06.167 --> 00:31:06.947
V: [screams]

00:31:08.210 --> 00:31:09.923
H C.: Okay, Westerburgers!

00:31:09.923 --> 00:31:12.659
Time to celebrate our upcoming victory over the Razorbacks

00:31:12.659 --> 00:31:14.859
by WHACKING apart their mascot!

00:31:16.223 --> 00:31:22.083
H M.: We need a volunteer to take the first swing at the piñata!

00:31:22.083 --> 00:31:23.670
H C.: Martha Dunstock!

00:31:24.707 --> 00:31:27.066
I think you should do the honors!

00:31:27.066 --> 00:31:28.926
M: I don't really know this game.

00:31:28.926 --> 00:31:32.588
H M.: [gasps] Let's show this girl some Westerburg spirit! Whoop!

00:31:32.588 --> 00:31:34.708
S: [cheering]

00:31:34.708 --> 00:31:37.253
H M.: Martha! Martha!

00:31:37.253 --> 00:31:45.810
All: MARTHA! MARTHA! MARTHA! MARTHA! MARTHA!

00:31:46.290 --> 00:31:48.930
H M.: Bring out the piñata.

00:31:50.733 --> 00:31:55.176
S: [laughing and cheering]

00:31:55.176 --> 00:31:56.329
V: Hey, give that to me!

00:31:56.329 --> 00:31:57.481
H D.: HEATHER, HELP!

00:31:57.481 --> 00:31:58.978
V: Give it to me now, NOW!

00:31:58.978 --> 00:32:01.027
R: GIRL FIGHT! KISS! KISS!

00:32:01.027 --> 00:32:02.728
S: KISS! KISS!

00:32:02.728 --> 00:32:05.098
V: ENOUGH! What is your DAMAGE, Heather?!

00:32:06.711 --> 00:32:08.781
You want this thing, then swim for it!

00:32:14.137 --> 00:32:15.089
M: What's going on?!

00:32:15.089 --> 00:32:16.508
V: Just go home, ok? I'll explain it to you later.

00:32:16.508 --> 00:32:17.592
M: Oh, no, I was gonna do the--

00:32:17.592 --> 00:32:20.562
V: Listen to me, listen to me.. just go, ok? Go...

00:32:23.899 --> 00:32:25.619
I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry...

00:32:29.718 --> 00:32:31.464
Well! We gave it a shot, okay?

00:32:31.464 --> 00:32:34.194
I'm resigning my commission from the Lip Gloss Gestapo.

00:32:35.204 --> 00:32:36.862
I'm going back to civilian life.

00:32:36.862 --> 00:32:37.551
H C.: NO.

00:32:37.551 --> 00:32:39.648
V: Oh, don't spin me! I'm not feeling well...

00:32:39.648 --> 00:32:41.478
H C.: You don't GET to be a nobody.

00:32:41.478 --> 00:32:45.898
Come Monday, you're an ex-somebody! Not even the losers will touch you now!

00:32:45.898 --> 00:32:49.243
Transfer to Washington! Transfer to Jefferson!

00:32:49.243 --> 00:32:53.303
No one at Westerburg's gonna let you play their reindeer games!

00:32:53.307 --> 00:32:56.277
V: [coughing and gasping]

00:32:57.703 --> 00:32:59.484
[vomits]

00:32:59.484 --> 00:33:02.195
H C.: [screams]

00:33:02.195 --> 00:33:05.269
I RAISED YOU UP FROM NOTHING!

00:33:05.269 --> 00:33:09.207
AND WHAT'S MY THANKS?! I GET PAID IN PUKE!

00:33:09.207 --> 00:33:13.157
V: Ohhh, lick it up, baby! Lick! It! Up!

00:33:20.445 --> 00:33:23.495
H C.: I know who I'M eating lunch with on Monday.

00:33:24.616 --> 00:33:25.616
Do YOU?

00:33:40.464 --> 00:33:41.986
Okay, party people!

00:33:41.986 --> 00:33:44.380
Where's the goddamn keg?!

00:33:44.380 --> 00:33:50.670
S: [cheering]

00:33:55.230 --> 00:33:58.270
V: The demon queen of high school has decreed it.

00:33:59.455 --> 00:34:04.045
She says Monday, 8a.m. I will be deleted.

00:34:04.958 --> 00:34:09.420
They'll hunt me down in study hall, stuff and mount me on the wall.

00:34:09.420 --> 00:34:13.760
30 hours to live, how shall I spend them?

00:34:13.982 --> 00:34:17.802
I don't have to stay and die like cattle.

00:34:18.458 --> 00:34:22.819
I could change my name and ride up to Seattle.

00:34:23.217 --> 00:34:25.328
But I don't own a motorbike.

00:34:26.308 --> 00:34:29.018
Wait... here's an option that I like!

00:34:29.018 --> 00:34:31.596
Spend these 30 hours gettin'

00:34:31.820 --> 00:34:35.110
freaky~!

00:34:35.110 --> 00:34:35.888
YEAH!

00:34:35.888 --> 00:34:40.053
I need it hard, I'm a dead girl walkin'!

00:34:40.053 --> 00:34:44.103
I'm in your yard! I'm a dead girl walkin'.

00:34:44.428 --> 00:34:48.688
Before they punch my clock, I'm snappin' off your window lock!

00:34:48.996 --> 00:34:53.147
Got no time to knock, I'm a dead girl walkin'!

00:34:54.205 --> 00:34:55.545
JD: Woah. Veronica!

00:34:55.826 --> 00:34:57.304
What are you doing in my room?!

00:34:57.304 --> 00:34:59.804
V: Shh, shh shhhh!

00:35:00.466 --> 00:35:03.986
Sorry, but I really had to wake you.

00:35:03.986 --> 00:35:08.770
See, I decided I must ride you 'til I break you!

00:35:08.770 --> 00:35:13.512
'Cause Heather says I gots to go! You're my last meal on death row.

00:35:13.512 --> 00:35:19.735
Shut your mouth, and lose them tighty-whities.

00:35:19.735 --> 00:35:20.526
Come on!

00:35:20.526 --> 00:35:24.536
Tonight I'm yours! I'm your dead girl walking!

00:35:24.536 --> 00:35:28.751
Get on all fours, kiss this dead girl walking!

00:35:28.751 --> 00:35:33.490
Let's go, you know the drill! I'm hot, and pissed, and on the pill.

00:35:33.490 --> 00:35:37.220
Bow down to the will of a dead girl walkin'!

00:35:37.662 --> 00:35:40.732
And you know, you know, you know,

00:35:40.732 --> 00:35:42.421
it's 'cause you're beautiful.

00:35:42.421 --> 00:35:46.501
You say you're numb inside, but I can't agree.

00:35:46.501 --> 00:35:51.517
So the world's unfair, keep it locked out there!

00:35:51.517 --> 00:35:53.787
In here it's beautiful.

00:35:56.215 --> 00:36:00.059
LET'S MAKE THIS BEAUTIFUL!

00:36:00.059 --> 00:36:01.299
JD: That works for me!

00:36:16.242 --> 00:36:18.242
V: YEAH!

00:36:18.242 --> 00:36:21.255
Full steam ahead, take this dead girl walkin'!

00:36:21.255 --> 00:36:22.739
JD: How'd you find my address?

00:36:22.739 --> 00:36:25.639
V: Let's break the bed, rock this dead girl walkin'!

00:36:25.639 --> 00:36:27.389
JD: I think you tore my mattress!

00:36:27.389 --> 00:36:31.008
V: No sleep tonight for you, better chug that Mountain Dew!

00:36:31.008 --> 00:36:31.940
JD: Okay, okay.

00:36:31.940 --> 00:36:35.500
V: Get your ass in gear, make this whole town disappear!

00:36:35.500 --> 00:36:36.246
JD: Okay, okay!

00:36:36.246 --> 00:36:39.992
V: Slap me, pull my hair, touch me Both: THERE, AND THERE, AND THERE!

00:36:39.992 --> 00:36:43.512
And no more talkin',

00:36:43.512 --> 00:36:48.261
V: LOVE this dead girl walkin'! JD: Woah woah. Hey hey. Yeah yeah.

00:36:48.261 --> 00:36:52.503
Both: Love this dead girl walkin'! JD: Woah woah. Hey hey. Wait Wait--

00:36:52.503 --> 00:36:54.228
Both: LOVE THIS DEAD GIRL!

00:36:54.228 --> 00:36:57.254
YEAH! YEAH! YEAH!

00:36:57.254 --> 00:36:58.037
JD: Ow!

00:36:58.437 --> 00:37:04.777
Both: YEEEAAAH!

00:37:15.719 --> 00:37:17.799
H C.: Hellooo, slut.

00:37:18.893 --> 00:37:21.236
V: Oh, god... how did you get in here?!

00:37:21.236 --> 00:37:24.346
H C.: I'm like oxygen! I'm everywhere.

00:37:25.426 --> 00:37:29.276
Really, Veronica?! Sleeping with Ps*cho Trenchcoat Kid?

00:37:29.276 --> 00:37:31.026
[laughs]

00:37:31.030 --> 00:37:33.430
I will crucify you for this.

00:37:33.948 --> 00:37:35.914
Everyone at school's gonna know

00:37:35.914 --> 00:37:40.734
Good Little Veronica is nothing but a dirty whore.

00:37:41.733 --> 00:37:44.938
V: Heather... why are you SO determined to hurt me?

00:37:44.938 --> 00:37:46.624
H C.: Because I can!

00:37:47.204 --> 00:37:49.554
It'll be so very!

00:37:49.730 --> 00:37:53.783
S: VERY. VERY. VERY! VERY!

00:37:53.783 --> 00:37:58.047
H C.: [cackling]

00:37:58.047 --> 00:38:00.497
V: [screaming]

00:38:00.497 --> 00:38:02.823
JD: Woah! Veronica.. VERONICA! Veronica!

00:38:02.823 --> 00:38:04.993
V: [chokes and gasps] JD: God, you're soaking wet!

00:38:05.000 --> 00:38:09.040
V: Oh, my god.... Oh my god, it was just a dream.

00:38:11.136 --> 00:38:12.104
JD: What's the rush?

00:38:12.104 --> 00:38:13.832
V: I need to get to Heather's house.

00:38:13.832 --> 00:38:15.827
JD: What?! You told me you were done with Heather.

00:38:15.827 --> 00:38:18.296
V: Yeah, and it was a sweet fantasy! A world without Heather!

00:38:18.296 --> 00:38:20.965
A world where... everyone is free. Now it's morning.

00:38:20.965 --> 00:38:22.634
I have to go kiss her arobacized ass.

00:38:22.634 --> 00:38:23.864
JD: No. V: Yes.

00:38:25.163 --> 00:38:27.273
I'm.. not strong, like you are.

00:38:29.361 --> 00:38:30.561
JD: Let me come with.

00:38:31.656 --> 00:38:32.656
V: ...Really?

00:38:33.208 --> 00:38:36.108
JD: [chuckles] Yeah. ...For backup.

00:38:36.963 --> 00:38:39.313
V: Okay! Um....

00:38:44.456 --> 00:38:50.166
Uh... by the way... Um...

00:38:50.762 --> 00:38:52.322
You were my first!

00:39:15.458 --> 00:39:16.358
V: Heather?

00:39:19.417 --> 00:39:20.287
HEATHER!

00:39:20.905 --> 00:39:22.414
H C.: Whaaaat?

00:39:22.414 --> 00:39:23.234
V: Um...

00:39:24.675 --> 00:39:26.835
It's Veronica, I'm here to apologize.

00:39:28.977 --> 00:39:31.577
H C.: Hope you brought kneepads, bitch!

00:39:32.870 --> 00:39:35.840
Fix me a prairie oyster, and I'll THINK about it.

00:39:37.225 --> 00:39:38.185
V: Prairie Oyster?

00:39:38.185 --> 00:39:42.511
Oh! Wait, okay. Uh... Raw eggs, um.. vinegar,

00:39:42.511 --> 00:39:45.307
JD: Hot sauce, worcestershire, salt and pepper.

00:39:45.307 --> 00:39:47.710
V: Ha.. you know your hangover cures.

00:39:47.710 --> 00:39:49.530
JD: My dad trained me well.

00:39:50.480 --> 00:39:52.815
V: Look look look look, here's my revenge, ok?

00:39:52.815 --> 00:39:55.871
I'm gonna put a flemglobber in her prairie oyster and she'll never know!

00:39:55.871 --> 00:39:57.290
Ready? Watch.

00:39:57.290 --> 00:40:05.960
[cat coughing up a hairball sound]

00:40:06.704 --> 00:40:08.254
It's coming, it's coming.

00:40:08.256 --> 00:40:12.286
[hacks and spits]

00:40:12.986 --> 00:40:14.116
[laughs]

00:40:15.646 --> 00:40:18.046
JD: I'm more of a 'no rust build-up' man myself.

00:40:18.942 --> 00:40:21.757
V: Oh, ok! Don't be a dick, that stuff woud kill her.

00:40:21.757 --> 00:40:24.417
JD: Thus ending her hangover!

00:40:25.707 --> 00:40:29.016
I say... we go with Big Blue.

00:40:29.016 --> 00:40:30.016
V: [scoffs] You can't just go....

00:40:32.216 --> 00:40:32.996
Uh...

00:40:34.426 --> 00:40:37.486
Except she would never drink something that looks like that.

00:40:38.454 --> 00:40:39.324
JD: You're right.

00:40:39.733 --> 00:40:44.363
We'll use a mug! That way, she'll have no idea WHAT she's drinking.

00:40:46.739 --> 00:40:47.646
V: [clears throat]

00:40:47.646 --> 00:40:49.890
JD: Chickeeeen! [clucking]

00:40:49.890 --> 00:40:51.570
V: You know, you're not funny.

00:40:52.672 --> 00:40:53.382
JD: Okay.

00:40:54.437 --> 00:40:56.727
Okay, yeah. I'm sorry.

00:41:02.184 --> 00:41:05.324
H C.: PRAIRIE OYSTER! CHOP CHOP!

00:41:07.194 --> 00:41:08.364
JD: Veronica, you...

00:41:08.778 --> 00:41:09.488
V: What?

00:41:11.703 --> 00:41:12.853
JD: ...Nevermind.

00:41:14.712 --> 00:41:15.552
V: Okay!

00:41:19.239 --> 00:41:20.853
Good morning, Heather.

00:41:20.853 --> 00:41:23.293
H C.: Awww, Veronica.

00:41:23.705 --> 00:41:27.205
And Jessie James, quelle surprise.

00:41:27.901 --> 00:41:30.501
Well, let's get to it! Beg!

00:41:31.207 --> 00:41:35.509
V: Okay, um... I-I think that last night, we both said a lot of things that--

00:41:35.509 --> 00:41:39.299
H C.: I, actually, would prefer you did this on your knees.

00:41:39.299 --> 00:41:41.539
In front of your boy toy here!

00:41:43.210 --> 00:41:44.300
V: Um...

00:41:45.579 --> 00:41:49.770
V: I'm-I'm really sorry-- H C.: [laughs]

00:41:49.770 --> 00:41:52.396
Do I look like I'm kidding?

00:41:52.966 --> 00:41:53.836
DOWN.

00:41:59.379 --> 00:42:00.579
Nice....

00:42:02.581 --> 00:42:04.691
But you're still dead to me.

00:42:14.446 --> 00:42:19.246
[choking]

00:42:19.960 --> 00:42:23.060
CORN... NUTS!

00:42:36.146 --> 00:42:38.562
JD: Hoooly shit!

00:42:38.562 --> 00:42:40.602
V: Wait, wait, wait wait....

00:42:40.602 --> 00:42:42.082
Oh my GOD.

00:42:42.082 --> 00:42:44.766
OH MY GOD! DON'T JUST STAND THERE, CALL 911.

00:42:44.766 --> 00:42:46.022
JD: It's a little late for that.

00:42:46.022 --> 00:42:49.282
V: Heather! ..Heather!! Heather....

00:42:50.736 --> 00:42:52.036
Oh my god....

00:42:52.657 --> 00:42:54.774
Oh my god, I just KILLED my best friend!

00:42:54.774 --> 00:42:57.034
JD: And your worst enemy! V: Same.. difference!!

00:42:59.570 --> 00:43:01.700
The police are gonna think that I did this on purpose.

00:43:02.437 --> 00:43:06.047
Oh my god... they're gonna have to send my SAT scores to San Quentin.

00:43:07.920 --> 00:43:09.620
JD: Unless...

00:43:10.949 --> 00:43:16.009
Oh, look! She was reading... The Bell Jar!

00:43:19.978 --> 00:43:21.578
V: Oh, no. JD: Oh, yes!

00:43:22.061 --> 00:43:23.570
You can fake her handwriting.

00:43:23.570 --> 00:43:26.020
Just.. make it sound deep. Like this...

00:43:26.358 --> 00:43:30.594
I had pain in my path... like Sylvia Plath...

00:43:30.594 --> 00:43:34.034
JD: My problems were myriad. V: I was having my period.

00:43:35.694 --> 00:43:38.394
[laughs]

00:43:39.431 --> 00:43:41.291
[continues laughing]

00:43:41.909 --> 00:43:46.779
[still laughing]

00:43:48.709 --> 00:43:49.899
OH MY GOD!

00:43:50.368 --> 00:43:53.330
JD: This isn't funny, you could go to jail!! Get your head on straight, NOW.

00:43:53.330 --> 00:43:56.753
V: Okay! Ok, ok, ok, ok... Um, Heather would never use the word "myriad", 'cause

00:43:56.753 --> 00:43:58.621
she missed it on her vocab quiz last week.

00:43:58.621 --> 00:44:01.369
JD: So it's a badge for her failures at school! WORK. WITH. ME.

00:44:01.369 --> 00:44:03.619
V: Okay! Okay. Um... Where do I start?

00:44:04.666 --> 00:44:07.166
JD: Think... long and hard.

00:44:07.925 --> 00:44:09.215
What would she say?

00:44:10.314 --> 00:44:15.623
What's her.. her final statement to a cold, uncaring planet?

00:44:15.623 --> 00:44:19.042
V: Okay, um... Dear world, uh...

00:44:19.042 --> 00:44:24.151
Believe it or not, I knew about fear. I knew the way loneliness stung.

00:44:24.151 --> 00:44:27.301
I hid behind smiles, and crazy hot clothes.

00:44:27.306 --> 00:44:30.163
V: I learned to kiss boys with my tongue. JD: That's good.

00:44:30.163 --> 00:44:35.303
V: But ohhh, the world, it held me down. Uh...

00:44:35.972 --> 00:44:40.442
It.. weighed like a... concrete prom queen crown.

00:44:40.967 --> 00:44:46.417
H C.: No one thinks a pretty girl has feelings.

00:44:46.417 --> 00:44:51.816
No one gets her insecurity.

00:44:51.816 --> 00:44:56.851
I am more than shoulder pads and makeup!

00:44:56.851 --> 00:45:03.031
No one sees the me inside of me.

00:45:03.463 --> 00:45:07.103
Jesus... you're making me sound like Air Supply.

00:45:09.017 --> 00:45:11.867
JD: Keep going. This has to be good enough to fool the cops.

00:45:19.975 --> 00:45:23.025
Cop 1: Woooah! Is it murder?

00:45:24.424 --> 00:45:26.774
Cop 2: No, look. Suicide note!

00:45:26.998 --> 00:45:29.874
H C. (and V): They couldn't see past my rock star mystique,

00:45:29.874 --> 00:45:32.464
they wouldn't dare look in my eyes!

00:45:32.464 --> 00:45:38.256
But just underneath was a terrified girl, who clings to her pillow and cries.

00:45:38.256 --> 00:45:43.936
My looks were just like prison bars.

00:45:43.936 --> 00:45:48.525
They've left me a myriad of scars!

00:45:49.005 --> 00:45:50.376
H C.: "Myriad"! Nice.

00:45:50.376 --> 00:45:55.456
All: No one thinks a pretty girl has substance!

00:45:55.456 --> 00:46:00.863
That's the curse of popularity. Cops: Popularity!

00:46:00.863 --> 00:46:05.852
Mr. Chandler: I am more than just a source of handjobs.

00:46:05.852 --> 00:46:13.602
All: No one sees the me inside of me!

00:46:14.703 --> 00:46:17.188
Principal: Heather Chandler's not your everyday suicide.

00:46:17.433 --> 00:46:19.683
Coach: Principal Gowan, you should cancel classes.

00:46:19.750 --> 00:46:21.040
Pr: No way, Coach!

00:46:21.171 --> 00:46:25.071
I send the kids home before lunch, and the switchboard'll light up like a xmas tree!

00:46:25.342 --> 00:46:27.662
We're just gonna have to power through this thing.

00:46:27.704 --> 00:46:31.344
Ms. F: Our children are dying!! Look,

00:46:31.379 --> 00:46:35.049
I hate to pull out my counter culture bonafides here, I really do,

00:46:35.111 --> 00:46:38.931
but what this school needs is a good old-fashioned rap session.

00:46:39.001 --> 00:46:45.951
Now, I suggest we get everybody into the cafeteria and just TALK and FEEL together.

00:46:46.661 --> 00:46:50.001
Pr: Thank you, Ms. Fleming. Call me when the shuttle lands.

00:46:51.751 --> 00:46:55.271
Ms.F: [laughs] Go ahead, laaauugh at the hippie!

00:46:55.381 --> 00:46:59.309
But I am telling you, we all misjudged Heather Chandler.

00:46:59.529 --> 00:47:02.919
This is the loveliest suicide note I have ever read.

00:47:03.422 --> 00:47:07.792
F and HC: Box up my clothing for Goodwill, and give the poor my NordicTrack.

00:47:07.792 --> 00:47:11.996
Donate my car to cr*ppled kids, or to those ghetto moms on crack.

00:47:12.064 --> 00:47:18.464
Give them my hats and my CDs, my pumps, my flats, my 3 TVs.

00:47:18.535 --> 00:47:23.335
All: No one thinks a pretty girl has feelings.

00:47:23.484 --> 00:47:27.484
But I weep for all I failed to be.

00:47:28.258 --> 00:47:32.898
Maybe I can help the world by leaving.

00:47:32.940 --> 00:47:39.250
Maybe that's the me inside of me!

00:47:39.472 --> 00:47:42.942
Pr: Aw, hell! Long weekend for everybody!

00:47:43.010 --> 00:47:44.752
[all cheering]

00:47:44.752 --> 00:47:47.834
Ms.F: Alright, not so fast, kids! Here, take these and pass them around.

00:47:47.834 --> 00:47:52.564
Now, they're refueling the buses, which gives us... a solid half hour of healing.

00:47:53.649 --> 00:47:59.039
I've mimeographed copies of suicide note so you all can FEEL Heather's anguish.

00:47:59.262 --> 00:48:01.685
H M.: I never knew about her pain! Ms.F: Go on...

00:48:01.685 --> 00:48:04.546
Boy: Her life had hit a rocky patch! Ms.F: FEEL.

00:48:04.546 --> 00:48:07.293
Girl: Deep down, she wasn't cruel or vain! Ms.F: HEAL!

00:48:07.293 --> 00:48:09.703
Students: She didn't mean to be a snatch!

00:48:11.364 --> 00:48:15.038
Ms.F: Veronica. You've been awfully quiet, what's on your mind?

00:48:15.118 --> 00:48:15.888
V: Uh...

00:48:18.209 --> 00:48:23.607
Maybe Heather realized that, uh, in order to be happy, she had to give up her power,

00:48:23.607 --> 00:48:26.107
And that the only way to do that was... death?

00:48:26.598 --> 00:48:29.521
Ms.F: My god! Look what we've done, we're breaking through.

00:48:29.521 --> 00:48:31.671
Heather would be so proud of you!

00:48:31.671 --> 00:48:34.421
Students: And you, and you, and you!

00:48:34.804 --> 00:48:39.064
No one thinks a pretty girl can touch you!

00:48:39.426 --> 00:48:40.525
Girl: ...Heather touching me!

00:48:40.525 --> 00:48:44.605
S: But she's made us better than we were!

00:48:44.964 --> 00:48:49.374
Heather's dead, but she will live inside me!

00:48:49.626 --> 00:48:53.926
S: And I'll be the me inside of her! H C.: Holy crap...

00:48:54.936 --> 00:48:56.716
THIS IS AWESOME!

00:48:56.747 --> 00:49:00.967
S: Heather cried, our sins fell on her shoulders. H.C: JESUS CHRIST!

00:49:00.976 --> 00:49:05.430
S: Heather died so we could all be free! H C.: I'M BIGGER THAN JOHN LENNON!

00:49:05.430 --> 00:49:09.160
S: Heather's gone, but she will live forever!

00:49:09.499 --> 00:49:12.822
M: She's the dove that sings outside my window!

00:49:12.822 --> 00:49:16.054
Boy: She's the twin from who I'm separated!

00:49:16.054 --> 00:49:19.114
Girl: She's the horse I never got for Christmas!

00:49:19.323 --> 00:49:25.403
S: Heather sees the me inside of me!

00:49:25.749 --> 00:49:30.909
Heather is... the me inside of me!

00:49:31.308 --> 00:49:38.188
INSIDE OOOOF

00:49:38.188 --> 00:49:38.908
ME!

00:49:48.181 --> 00:49:50.957
H D.: At a time like this, negative people choose to focus on their grief.

00:49:51.037 --> 00:49:55.648
Well, I hate those people. Because I am a very positive person. I remember

00:49:55.648 --> 00:49:59.878
the good times, like when Heather and I got our ears pierced at the mall--

00:50:00.314 --> 00:50:03.494
I can still hear those late night talks on the phone.

00:50:03.940 --> 00:50:07.738
[speaking Mandarin(?)]

00:50:07.738 --> 00:50:09.651
-she said, "CORN NUTS!" [still in Mandarin(?)]

00:50:09.651 --> 00:50:12.251
V: AHH, NO! Turn it off, turn it off, turn it off, turn it off!

00:50:17.463 --> 00:50:20.113
Damn, how many networks did she run to?

00:50:20.643 --> 00:50:23.691
JD: Why son, I didn't hear you come in.

00:50:23.691 --> 00:50:26.463
Bud Dean: Yeah pop, I wanted to introduce you to my new girlfriend!

00:50:26.463 --> 00:50:28.923
V: Oh, hi! Hey, uh, I'm Veronica.

00:50:29.760 --> 00:50:31.210
BD: Drink up, cutie.

00:50:31.410 --> 00:50:32.780
V: It's a little.. early.

00:50:33.029 --> 00:50:37.319
JD: Dad, hey champ, you know we don't condone underage drinking in this household.

00:50:37.319 --> 00:50:40.029
BD: Ohh, so you're a good girl.

00:50:40.305 --> 00:50:42.695
V: Um... uh...

00:50:42.947 --> 00:50:44.026
JD: Veronica was just leaving-

00:50:44.026 --> 00:50:49.096
BD: Come on, relax. Just havin' some fun! Huh? [chuckles] Sit, sit.

00:50:50.147 --> 00:50:52.367
Work was a real pain in the ass today.

00:50:53.229 --> 00:50:56.176
Some damn tribe of withered old bitches is trying to stop my poor ol' dad from

00:50:56.176 --> 00:50:58.404
blowin' up this fleabag hotel.

00:50:58.834 --> 00:51:01.664
All because Glenn Miller once took a dump there.

00:51:02.704 --> 00:51:05.024
Just like Kansas. You remember Kansas?

00:51:05.354 --> 00:51:06.144
JD: Yeah.

00:51:06.727 --> 00:51:09.657
The "Save The Memorial Oak" Society.

00:51:10.898 --> 00:51:12.948
My pop showed those tree humpers.

00:51:13.601 --> 00:51:17.621
Thirty bricks of C4 explosives stuck to the trunk.

00:51:18.309 --> 00:51:19.119
HE WAS--

00:51:19.119 --> 00:51:21.439
Both: ARRAIGNED BUT ACQUITTED!

00:51:22.421 --> 00:51:25.141
JD: Goddamn Kansas. BD: Hell of a time, hell of a time.

00:51:25.889 --> 00:51:29.799
BD: So pop, can I invite my girlfriend to supper?

00:51:30.361 --> 00:51:33.031
JD: Uhhh, I don't think that's such a good idea, son!

00:51:33.031 --> 00:51:34.491
BD: Come on, pop!

00:51:35.857 --> 00:51:37.687
Don't be a square.

00:51:38.291 --> 00:51:39.671
V: Oh! I.. um...

00:51:39.671 --> 00:51:42.781
I appreciate the offer, I-I really do, but I-I can't stay, actually

00:51:42.781 --> 00:51:46.421
'cause my mom is making my favorite.. meal tonight, it's spaghetti!

00:51:47.329 --> 00:51:49.059
...with looots of oregano!

00:51:51.199 --> 00:51:51.859
JD: Nice.

00:51:52.076 --> 00:51:55.176
Last time I saw MY mom, she was waving at me out the window

00:51:55.176 --> 00:51:57.511
of a library in... Texas.

00:51:58.031 --> 00:51:58.931
Right, dad?

00:52:01.521 --> 00:52:02.631
BD: Right, son.

00:52:04.694 --> 00:52:06.894
V: Okay! Well, see you tomorrow!

00:52:11.176 --> 00:52:15.256
Dear diary, JD's dad will NOT be speaking at our wedding.

00:52:20.052 --> 00:52:20.552
V: Hello?

00:52:20.952 --> 00:52:23.742
H M.: Veronica? I need help, I'm at the cemetery.

00:52:24.050 --> 00:52:24.664
V: What's wrong?

00:52:24.724 --> 00:52:25.974
H M.: Just hurry up, please?

00:52:26.184 --> 00:52:27.254
It's an emergency.

00:52:27.475 --> 00:52:27.935
V: Okay!

00:52:35.660 --> 00:52:41.310
[V taps on car window] [H M. rolls window down]

00:52:41.998 --> 00:52:44.968
V: Hey! Hi, uh... is Kurt okay?

00:52:45.534 --> 00:52:47.224
H M.: Oh, he passed out.

00:52:47.852 --> 00:52:51.054
Me and Kurt and Ram and Heather Duke came out to pour a jub of Thunderbird

00:52:51.054 --> 00:52:54.124
on Heather's grave, you know, from her homies?

00:52:56.158 --> 00:52:57.998
But Kurt and Ram drank it all.

00:52:59.854 --> 00:53:01.004
Kurt: Nooo!

00:53:01.814 --> 00:53:03.844
H M.: Then Heather and Ram went off together and...

00:53:04.097 --> 00:53:06.477
Kurt started grabbin' me and wouldn't stop.

00:53:08.445 --> 00:53:12.138
V: Wait, af- after everything.. that happened at Ram's party,

00:53:12.138 --> 00:53:13.458
why did you call ME?

00:53:14.050 --> 00:53:15.220
H M.: Oh, well that was the deal.

00:53:15.325 --> 00:53:17.915
If I got you to come, Kurt promised to leave me alone!

00:53:22.065 --> 00:53:22.975
V: So...

00:53:23.758 --> 00:53:25.988
So YOU avoided date r*pe...

00:53:26.772 --> 00:53:28.592
by volunteering ME...

00:53:29.747 --> 00:53:31.367
FOR date r*pe.

00:53:34.184 --> 00:53:36.024
H M.: God, you make it sound ugly.

00:53:38.213 --> 00:53:39.433
V: I'm leaving now.

00:53:40.436 --> 00:53:45.416
K: Heyyyyy, Veronicaaaa!

00:53:46.309 --> 00:53:49.059
I waited 10 whole beers for you!

00:53:49.760 --> 00:53:52.090
H D.: GODDAMNIT, Ram! I SAID I'm DONE!

00:53:52.160 --> 00:53:54.720
R: Come on, Heather, don't walk away!

00:53:54.840 --> 00:53:56.260
H D.: Sober up, idiot.

00:53:56.558 --> 00:53:57.528
Heather, unlock the door!

00:53:58.745 --> 00:54:00.295
[car door opens and closes]

00:54:00.440 --> 00:54:04.440
R: You can't leave me like this! [slams face on car window]

00:54:04.752 --> 00:54:08.752
R: You're causing physical pain in my area!

00:54:10.032 --> 00:54:12.842
It's science, I need relief!

00:54:13.026 --> 00:54:15.196
K: [grunts and points at Veronica]

00:54:15.352 --> 00:54:18.712
R: Heyyy, 'Rrrronicaaaa.

00:54:19.379 --> 00:54:21.209
V: Eugh.. you've got a left hand, use it.

00:54:21.209 --> 00:54:23.099
K: Don't talk mean like that!

00:54:23.702 --> 00:54:25.772
R: You'll hurt their feelings....

00:54:25.832 --> 00:54:28.372
V: Wait... whose feelings?! What are you talking about?

00:54:28.618 --> 00:54:31.415
R: You make my balls so blue.

00:54:31.735 --> 00:54:33.305
K: You hurt them badly

00:54:33.435 --> 00:54:35.735
R: You make my balls so blue.

00:54:35.855 --> 00:54:37.758
K: They're hanging sadly.

00:54:37.788 --> 00:54:39.937
R: What did they do to you?

00:54:40.448 --> 00:54:42.408
That you hate them so.

00:54:42.568 --> 00:54:43.628
K: Don't run from me.

00:54:43.815 --> 00:54:44.935
They're all beat up

00:54:44.935 --> 00:54:46.555
Both: Like a tackling dummy!

00:54:46.655 --> 00:54:49.345
K: They long for your embrace.

00:54:49.455 --> 00:54:50.993
R: They're warm like mittens.

00:54:51.113 --> 00:54:53.736
K: They'll curl up on your face.

00:54:53.816 --> 00:54:55.272
R: And purr like kittens.

00:54:55.532 --> 00:54:58.218
K: You make my balls so blue.

00:54:58.288 --> 00:55:00.911
Both: Just look at them glow!

00:55:00.941 --> 00:55:02.539
R: They're begging you!

00:55:02.629 --> 00:55:04.451
Both: Don't make my balls so blue!

00:55:04.451 --> 00:55:05.163
[V knocking on the car door]

00:55:05.163 --> 00:55:05.859
V: Heather!

00:55:05.859 --> 00:55:07.102
Heather! Open the door!

00:55:07.102 --> 00:55:08.883
H M. & D: Oh no! Oh no, no, no!

00:55:09.663 --> 00:55:11.323
V: What... open the door!

00:55:11.353 --> 00:55:13.420
H M. & D: Oh no! Oh no, no, no!

00:55:13.920 --> 00:55:15.760
K: You make my balls so blue

00:55:15.760 --> 00:55:17.398
So please say hello!

00:55:17.398 --> 00:55:18.076
R: Hold 'em!

00:55:18.076 --> 00:55:18.973
K: And fold 'em!

00:55:18.973 --> 00:55:20.450
Both: And never let go!

00:55:20.700 --> 00:55:23.707
K: Once you were geeky and nerdy.

00:55:23.817 --> 00:55:25.964
R: But they knew you're dirty!

00:55:25.984 --> 00:55:27.941
K: You're set them on fire!

00:55:27.991 --> 00:55:32.288
Both: What ever you require they'll do!

00:55:32.378 --> 00:55:33.588
So take them home

00:55:33.588 --> 00:55:35.155
to meet your parents!

00:55:35.265 --> 00:55:37.952
R: They'll wear a suit and tie.

00:55:37.992 --> 00:55:39.559
And a fancy collar!

00:55:39.679 --> 00:55:42.116
R: They'll sing a lullaby.

00:55:42.343 --> 00:55:44.160
Both: La la la la la.

00:55:44.290 --> 00:55:46.937
Please make these balls not blue!

00:55:47.047 --> 00:55:48.704
R: Just for a while

00:55:48.704 --> 00:55:50.131
K: Can't wait til later.

00:55:50.281 --> 00:55:51.558
Both: My pants are rubbin' like a

00:55:51.558 --> 00:55:53.295
hot cheese grater!

00:55:53.685 --> 00:55:54.962
V: Hey give me that one!

00:55:55.586 --> 00:55:57.606
LOOK! Booze! Drink!

00:55:57.636 --> 00:56:00.733
K: Aw! Thank you so much! V: You are so welcome.

00:56:00.840 --> 00:56:02.127
R: They will protect you,

00:56:02.127 --> 00:56:03.104
K: Defend you,

00:56:03.104 --> 00:56:04.181
R: Respect you,

00:56:04.181 --> 00:56:05.308
K: Befriend you-

00:56:05.308 --> 00:56:07.995
R: Like WInnie-the-Pooh!

00:56:07.995 --> 00:56:09.572
K: Baby, baby, baby!

00:56:09.572 --> 00:56:10.629
They're so blue!

00:56:10.629 --> 00:56:13.166
R: My balls will work for you!

00:56:13.206 --> 00:56:14.756
They will obey ya!

00:56:14.913 --> 00:56:17.250
R: They really need rescue,

00:56:17.380 --> 00:56:19.060
Like Princess Leia!

00:56:19.380 --> 00:56:21.927
Both: Baby you've gots to come through!

00:56:22.177 --> 00:56:23.784
K: Teach them to smile!

00:56:23.784 --> 00:56:24.601
You've got no clue

00:56:24.601 --> 00:56:25.828
How much these two

00:56:25.828 --> 00:56:26.695
Depend on you!

00:56:26.695 --> 00:56:29.862
Please help them through!

00:56:30.612 --> 00:56:32.359
K, R, & Heathers: My balls are in your court!

00:56:32.366 --> 00:56:34.953
K &R: Yeah! H. M & D: You make them balls so blue!

00:56:34.953 --> 00:56:36.740
K &R: You make my balls so blue!

00:56:37.080 --> 00:56:39.710
H. M & D: You make my balls so blue! K: Oooh! Ow!

00:56:39.990 --> 00:56:41.944
You make them balls so blue! H. M &D: You shake them K &R: Oh god!

00:56:41.944 --> 00:56:43.301
You quake them. K &R: My balls!

00:56:43.301 --> 00:56:43.948
You break-

00:56:43.948 --> 00:56:45.285
K, R, & Heathers: You make my balls so blue!

00:56:45.285 --> 00:56:46.472
H. M & D: You take them R: Lookit!

00:56:46.472 --> 00:56:47.379
You bake them! K: Lookit!

00:56:47.379 --> 00:56:48.262
H. M & D: Chrissake

00:56:48.262 --> 00:56:49.684
You make my balls so blue!

00:56:49.684 --> 00:56:52.741
Please make their dreams come true!

00:56:52.901 --> 00:57:00.261
And make these balls not blue!

00:57:12.144 --> 00:57:13.361
V: Dear diary,

00:57:13.941 --> 00:57:16.291
Close call last night, uh...

00:57:16.453 --> 00:57:18.063
The only person at the Westerburg who

00:57:18.063 --> 00:57:20.303
could actually control Kurt and Ram

00:57:20.303 --> 00:57:21.703
was Heather Chandler.

00:57:21.969 --> 00:57:23.339
And she is dead.

00:57:24.235 --> 00:57:26.595
H C.: Shoulda thought of that before you killed me!

00:57:26.595 --> 00:57:30.025
[hacking and choking] God!

00:57:30.025 --> 00:57:33.065
I'm gonna be coughing up drain cleaner for eternity!

00:57:33.101 --> 00:57:34.941
[hacking]

00:57:35.719 --> 00:57:36.399
V: Uh..

00:57:37.264 --> 00:57:38.724
I didn't technically kill Heather,

00:57:38.724 --> 00:57:41.464
and I know that, but I still... feel bad.

00:57:42.132 --> 00:57:42.892
But...

00:57:43.002 --> 00:57:44.752
not as bad as I should...?

00:57:44.972 --> 00:57:47.712
And that... makes me feel even worse.

00:57:50.350 --> 00:57:51.260
Oh hey, guys!

00:57:51.592 --> 00:57:53.882
Still really looking forward to that apology from both of you

00:57:53.882 --> 00:57:56.182
for being two ice cold bitches last night!

00:57:56.423 --> 00:57:59.673
H D.: Um, cleaning out Heather's locker? Little respect?!

00:57:59.673 --> 00:58:02.713
H C.: [scoffs] Heather Duke was such a sad little poser.

00:58:03.621 --> 00:58:06.021
Veronica, tell her to stop touching my STUFF!

00:58:06.487 --> 00:58:07.787
Veronica!

00:58:07.964 --> 00:58:09.894
H C.: VERONICA! V: SHUT UP, HEATHER!

00:58:09.894 --> 00:58:13.834
H D.: YOU shut up! I don't have to shut up ANYMORE!

00:58:21.495 --> 00:58:22.715
H M.: Hey, that's Heather's scrunchie!

00:58:22.715 --> 00:58:24.905
H D.: Shut up, Heather! H M.: Sorry, Heather....

00:58:25.085 --> 00:58:27.975
H D.: Heather Chandler is gone. It's up to me to replace her!

00:58:28.440 --> 00:58:29.950
V: Replace Heather Chandler?

00:58:29.950 --> 00:58:30.780
H D.: Please!

00:58:31.086 --> 00:58:32.969
You need to worry less about me,

00:58:32.969 --> 00:58:34.879
and more about your reputation.

00:58:35.057 --> 00:58:36.827
Kurt and Ram have been telling the whole school

00:58:36.827 --> 00:58:39.367
about your little three-way last night.

00:58:39.378 --> 00:58:40.208
JD: Three-way?

00:58:40.208 --> 00:58:41.058
V: Oh!...

00:58:41.698 --> 00:58:43.046
No- there was no three-way,

00:58:43.046 --> 00:58:44.226
nothing happened.

00:58:44.686 --> 00:58:46.318
H D.: I remember differently.

00:58:46.318 --> 00:58:48.478
I seem to remember there was a--

00:58:48.610 --> 00:58:51.610
Kurt & Ram: Big sword fight in her mouth.

00:58:51.741 --> 00:58:53.191
Preppy stud: And she allowed it!?

00:58:53.343 --> 00:58:56.293
K, R & Prep: Big sword fight in her mouth.

00:58:56.293 --> 00:58:57.963
H. C & D: It sure sounds crowded.

00:58:57.963 --> 00:59:00.633
K: And then we both went south.

00:59:00.653 --> 00:59:02.403
R: And planted our flags!

00:59:02.403 --> 00:59:03.843
K: My big salami.

00:59:03.953 --> 00:59:06.673
K & R: Ba-bent her over like origami.

00:59:06.763 --> 00:59:07.663
Whoa ooh!

00:59:07.723 --> 00:59:08.553
Whoa ooh!

00:59:08.618 --> 00:59:09.648
Whoa ooh!

00:59:09.715 --> 00:59:11.645
Whoa ooh!

00:59:11.934 --> 00:59:13.884
Everybody was sword fighting

00:59:13.884 --> 00:59:15.803
in her mouth!

00:59:15.803 --> 00:59:17.343
Yes we're convinced it,

00:59:17.413 --> 00:59:19.683
went down right in her mouth!

00:59:20.113 --> 00:59:21.893
H. C: I hope she rinsed it!

00:59:22.073 --> 00:59:24.673
Ram: She blew and blew and blew

00:59:24.673 --> 00:59:26.313
Like they were balloons!

00:59:26.313 --> 00:59:27.293
K: She lapped us up

00:59:27.293 --> 00:59:28.513
R: Like a hardy stew

00:59:28.513 --> 00:59:29.543
K & R: She bit on more than

00:59:29.543 --> 00:59:32.233
she could chew!

00:59:33.153 --> 00:59:35.223
H. D: She'll do the same for you!

00:59:35.223 --> 00:59:37.753
She blew not one guy but two

00:59:37.753 --> 00:59:39.323
She blew and blew and blew.

00:59:39.323 --> 00:59:41.303
She's like a freak in a zoo.

00:59:41.303 --> 00:59:43.643
H. D: Veronica blew two She blew and blew and blew

00:59:43.643 --> 00:59:46.593
And every word is true.

00:59:46.843 --> 00:59:51.103
Veronica blew two!

00:59:51.103 --> 00:59:54.293
H. C: Yeaaah!

01:00:05.933 --> 01:00:07.723
Students: Freak! Slut! Ps*cho!

01:00:07.723 --> 01:00:09.533
Slut! Punkass! Slut!

01:00:09.673 --> 01:00:12.813
Freak! Slut! Ps*cho! Slut! Punkass-...!

01:00:12.963 --> 01:00:14.343
K and H D.: Whoooore.

01:00:14.343 --> 01:00:16.043
[Kurt laughing]

01:00:18.454 --> 01:00:19.384
V: Oh my god....

01:00:20.043 --> 01:00:21.433
Are you ok?

01:00:21.743 --> 01:00:22.946
V: Can you look at me? Are you ok?

01:00:22.946 --> 01:00:23.946
JD: Yeah, yeah I'm fine...

01:00:24.096 --> 01:00:25.186
How about you?

01:00:25.365 --> 01:00:28.045
V: Oh yeah, no, I'm fine, I'm um...

01:00:28.633 --> 01:00:30.753
I'm awesome, I...

01:00:33.458 --> 01:00:36.488
I'm s- I'm sorry about the waterworks. I just-...

01:00:36.488 --> 01:00:39.188
JD: They made you cry,

01:00:39.689 --> 01:00:42.639
but that will end tonight.

01:00:42.858 --> 01:00:45.668
You are the only thing that's right

01:00:45.668 --> 01:00:48.388
about this broken world.

01:00:48.721 --> 01:00:50.791
Go on and cry.

01:00:51.716 --> 01:00:54.426
But when the morning comes,

01:00:54.426 --> 01:00:57.466
We'll burn it down and then,

01:00:57.501 --> 01:01:01.681
we'll build the world again.

01:01:02.142 --> 01:01:04.142
Our love is God.

01:01:08.376 --> 01:01:09.316
V: Are you ok?-

01:01:09.336 --> 01:01:11.406
JD: I was alone.

01:01:12.252 --> 01:01:14.802
I was a frozen lake.

01:01:14.920 --> 01:01:17.760
But then you melted me awake,

01:01:17.769 --> 01:01:20.599
see, now I'm crying too.

01:01:20.599 --> 01:01:22.019
JD: You're not alone.

01:01:22.019 --> 01:01:23.629
V: You're not alone.

01:01:23.712 --> 01:01:25.662
JD: And when the morning comes,

01:01:25.662 --> 01:01:29.202
V: When the morning comes, JD: We'll burn away that tear,

01:01:29.390 --> 01:01:31.205
JD: and raise our city here.

01:01:31.205 --> 01:01:34.325
V: Raise our city here.

01:01:34.367 --> 01:01:36.227
Both: Our love is God.

01:01:49.598 --> 01:01:50.718
K: YEAH-LO?

01:01:52.192 --> 01:01:53.962
V: Hiii~, Kurt!

01:01:54.750 --> 01:01:56.320
K: It's Veronica...

01:01:56.366 --> 01:01:56.966
V: Um..

01:01:56.966 --> 01:01:59.156
Hey, how did you know it was always

01:01:59.156 --> 01:02:02.076
a fantasy of mine to have 2 guys at once?

01:02:03.426 --> 01:02:04.806
K: Uhhhhhh...

01:02:04.806 --> 01:02:05.889
Uhh..

01:02:05.989 --> 01:02:07.269
Lucky guess.

01:02:09.899 --> 01:02:11.549
V: Well, if you want it to come true,

01:02:11.549 --> 01:02:14.599
then meet me at the cemetery at dawn.

01:02:17.031 --> 01:02:18.051
K: Free pussy.

01:02:18.171 --> 01:02:20.901
R: And we don't even have to buy it a pizza.

01:02:20.901 --> 01:02:23.861
K: WHAAT! Both: [laughing]

01:02:24.381 --> 01:02:26.791
JD: We can start and finish wars.

01:02:26.791 --> 01:02:29.241
Both: We're what killed the dinosaurs.

01:02:29.499 --> 01:02:34.559
We're the asteroid that's overdue!

01:02:34.819 --> 01:02:37.309
The dinosaurs choked on the dust.

01:02:37.309 --> 01:02:40.219
They died because God said they must.

01:02:40.232 --> 01:02:45.062
The new world needed room for me and you.

01:02:47.987 --> 01:02:50.107
JD: I worship you.

01:02:51.044 --> 01:02:53.534
I'd trade my life for yours.

01:02:53.754 --> 01:02:56.394
We'll make them disappear.

01:02:56.437 --> 01:03:01.727
JD: We'll plant our garden here. V: Plant our garden here.

01:03:01.953 --> 01:03:04.073
JD: Our love is God.

01:03:04.163 --> 01:03:06.123
V: Our love is God.

01:03:06.130 --> 01:03:08.060
JD: Our love is God.

01:03:08.060 --> 01:03:10.223
V: Our love is God.

01:03:10.223 --> 01:03:12.523
JD: Our love is God.

01:03:17.463 --> 01:03:19.073
V: Woah, uh...

01:03:20.257 --> 01:03:21.367
V: Is that real?

01:03:21.367 --> 01:03:22.237
JD: Yeah.

01:03:22.655 --> 01:03:24.965
But we're filling it with Ich Lüge bullets.

01:03:25.255 --> 01:03:27.045
V: Ich Lüge.. what?

01:03:27.045 --> 01:03:29.305
JD: My grandad scored them in World War 2.

01:03:29.305 --> 01:03:32.025
They contain this powerful tranquilizer.

01:03:32.144 --> 01:03:33.246
The Nazis used them to fake their own

01:03:33.246 --> 01:03:35.588
suicides when the Russians invaded Berlin.

01:03:37.158 --> 01:03:40.101
We, will use them to knock out Kurt and Ram

01:03:40.570 --> 01:03:41.718
just long enough to make it

01:03:41.718 --> 01:03:43.838
look like a suicide pact,

01:03:44.097 --> 01:03:46.787
complete with a forged suicide note.

01:03:48.261 --> 01:03:49.961
K&R: Ram and I died because we had

01:03:49.961 --> 01:03:52.611
to hide our gay forbidden love

01:03:52.611 --> 01:03:55.061
from a misapproving world.

01:03:57.186 --> 01:03:59.746
JD: And when the morning comes,

01:03:59.746 --> 01:04:02.466
they'll both be laughing stocks.

01:04:02.466 --> 01:04:06.546
Both: SO LET'S GO HUNT SOME JOCKS!

01:04:08.919 --> 01:04:10.959
K: Hey, hi! Hi!

01:04:11.029 --> 01:04:11.989
Hi.

01:04:13.949 --> 01:04:15.119
.. VeronicA.

01:04:15.119 --> 01:04:17.459
R: So do we just like, whip it out, or what?

01:04:17.459 --> 01:04:18.549
V: Ah!

01:04:18.979 --> 01:04:20.649
Take it slow, Ram.

01:04:21.605 --> 01:04:23.125
Strip for me~.

01:04:24.300 --> 01:04:25.120
R: Okay...

01:04:25.325 --> 01:04:27.625
K: Okaaaay~.

01:04:27.625 --> 01:04:28.252
V: Oh, wow-

01:04:28.252 --> 01:04:31.682
Ohhhh, woooow!

01:04:31.682 --> 01:04:32.940
K: You like that?

01:04:32.940 --> 01:04:36.120
V: I loooove thaaaat....

01:04:36.147 --> 01:04:37.077
K: What about you?

01:04:37.077 --> 01:04:38.087
V: Oh! [cough]

01:04:38.087 --> 01:04:40.127
Uh.. I was hoping...

01:04:40.127 --> 01:04:42.529
you could rip my clothes off me, sport.

01:04:43.809 --> 01:04:45.839
K&R: Yeah, we can do that.

01:04:47.458 --> 01:04:49.168
K: This is the best!!

01:04:49.193 --> 01:04:51.003
V: This IS the best.

01:04:54.377 --> 01:04:55.317
V: Okay, count of three!

01:04:55.317 --> 01:04:56.387
K: Yeah!!

01:04:57.044 --> 01:04:58.644
All 3: One...

01:04:58.644 --> 01:04:59.894
Two...

01:04:59.894 --> 01:05:00.568
JD: Three!

01:05:00.568 --> 01:05:01.753
[Double gunshot]

01:05:01.753 --> 01:05:02.848
K: HOLY CRAP!

01:05:02.865 --> 01:05:05.085
JD: Stay here, I'll get him. K: YOU KILLED MY BEST FRIEND!

01:05:05.085 --> 01:05:08.175
JD: Kuuurt... KURT! K: WHY ARE YOU CHASING ME?!

01:05:08.175 --> 01:05:12.505
V: ...Ram? Ram, you're just unconscious, right? K: I'M JUST KIDDING ABOUT THE BO DIDDLEY THING!

01:05:12.505 --> 01:05:13.885
V: Ram?!

01:05:13.885 --> 01:05:16.845
JD: GET OFF THE DAMN FENCE! K: I DON'T UNDERSTAND!

01:05:18.794 --> 01:05:22.304
JD: We can start and finish wars...

01:05:22.546 --> 01:05:25.966
We're what killed the dinosaurs.

01:05:26.180 --> 01:05:30.180
JD: We're the asteroid that's overdue.

01:05:30.180 --> 01:05:31.681
K: STOP BEING A DICK.

01:05:32.456 --> 01:05:34.686
JD: The dinosaurs choked on the dust,

01:05:34.686 --> 01:05:37.666
K: WHAT DOES THAT MEAN!? JD: They'll die because we say they must!

01:05:45.710 --> 01:05:48.430
V: What the FUCK have you done?!

01:05:52.965 --> 01:05:54.835
JD: I worship you...

01:05:56.080 --> 01:05:58.850
I'd trade my life for yours.

01:05:58.850 --> 01:06:01.900
We'll make them disappear.

01:06:01.900 --> 01:06:07.530
We'll plant our garden here....

01:06:07.560 --> 01:06:09.420
Our love is God.

01:06:10.620 --> 01:06:12.540
Our love is God.

01:06:13.696 --> 01:06:15.396
Our love is God.

01:06:16.491 --> 01:06:18.251
Our love is God.

01:06:19.440 --> 01:06:20.798
JD: Our love is God.

01:06:20.798 --> 01:06:22.278
V: OUR LOVE IS GOD.

01:06:22.278 --> 01:06:23.398
JD: Our love is God!

01:06:23.398 --> 01:06:25.012
V: OUR LOVE IS GOD.

01:06:25.012 --> 01:06:33.562
OUR LOVE IS GOD!

01:06:46.760 --> 01:06:47.980
V: Dear Diary,

01:06:49.493 --> 01:06:50.563
I'm goin' steady.

01:06:50.563 --> 01:06:52.123
Mostly he's awesome,

01:06:52.123 --> 01:06:54.283
if a bit too rock and roll.

01:06:54.684 --> 01:06:57.192
Lately he's bumped off 3 of my classmates,

01:06:57.192 --> 01:07:01.682
God have mercy on my soul!

01:07:02.319 --> 01:07:06.969
They were just seventeen....

01:07:07.786 --> 01:07:12.896
They still had room to grow...

01:07:13.097 --> 01:07:16.947
They could have turned out good,

01:07:17.017 --> 01:07:20.217
and now we'll never know.

01:07:21.722 --> 01:07:23.285
JD: There's been a lack of girls climbing

01:07:23.285 --> 01:07:25.065
through my bedroom window lately.

01:07:25.065 --> 01:07:26.105
V: Take a hint.

01:07:26.105 --> 01:07:27.945
JD: Okay. You're mad, I get it.

01:07:27.945 --> 01:07:29.695
V: No, I don't think you do.

01:07:29.695 --> 01:07:31.665
V: "Ich Lüge" bullets? You lied to me.

01:07:31.665 --> 01:07:33.265
JD: You were lying to yourself.

01:07:33.365 --> 01:07:34.255
JD: You wanted them dead too.

01:07:34.255 --> 01:07:34.975
V: Did not. JD: Did too.

01:07:35.015 --> 01:07:35.875
V: Did not. JD: Did too.

01:07:35.935 --> 01:07:36.525
V: Did NOT!

01:07:36.525 --> 01:07:37.325
JD: Hey!

01:07:37.685 --> 01:07:38.745
Did they make you cry?

01:07:38.745 --> 01:07:39.915
V: Yes...?

01:07:40.501 --> 01:07:41.651
JD: Can they make you cry now?

01:07:41.651 --> 01:07:43.501
V: No, but you can.

01:07:44.127 --> 01:07:46.137
JD: Just wait 'til you see the good that comes of this.

01:07:46.137 --> 01:07:48.177
V: No good could possibly come of this.

01:07:48.177 --> 01:07:50.617
JD: Call me an optimist!

01:07:52.072 --> 01:07:55.562
V: Dear diary, My teen angst bullshit has a body count.

01:08:07.755 --> 01:08:10.575
Mr. Kelly: I don't really know what I'm supposed to say up here.

01:08:11.778 --> 01:08:13.438
I'm ashamed, certainly.

01:08:14.036 --> 01:08:16.496
Our family has turned our town into a laughingstock.

01:08:16.822 --> 01:08:18.712
My boy Kurt isn't who I thought he was,

01:08:18.712 --> 01:08:21.362
and when I think of the SICK, DISGUSTING things

01:08:21.362 --> 01:08:22.631
that Kurt and Ram were doing-

01:08:22.631 --> 01:08:24.921
Mr. Sweeney: YOU WAIT JUST A MINUTE, PAUL.

01:08:25.506 --> 01:08:27.796
It is ignorant, hateful talk like yours that makes this world

01:08:27.796 --> 01:08:30.176
a place our boys could not live in!

01:08:30.621 --> 01:08:32.451
They were not dirty!

01:08:32.698 --> 01:08:34.249
They were not wrong!

01:08:34.716 --> 01:08:40.184
They were two lonely verses

01:08:40.184 --> 01:08:42.344
in the Lord's great song.

01:08:42.506 --> 01:08:44.176
Mr.K: Our boys were pansies, Bill.

01:08:44.313 --> 01:08:45.153
Mr.S: YES!

01:08:45.288 --> 01:08:48.068
My boy's a homosexual,

01:08:48.308 --> 01:08:51.448
and that don't scare me none.

01:08:51.883 --> 01:08:56.943
I want the world to know...

01:08:56.943 --> 01:08:59.122
I love my dead gay son!

01:09:04.725 --> 01:09:06.215
I've been thinkin'...

01:09:06.305 --> 01:09:07.234
prayin'...

01:09:07.814 --> 01:09:09.245
readin' some magazines,

01:09:09.265 --> 01:09:11.665
and it's time we opened our eyes!

01:09:12.272 --> 01:09:16.261
Well, the good Lord made the universe, the Lord created man.

01:09:16.365 --> 01:09:20.024
And I believe it's all a part of his gigantic plan.

01:09:20.290 --> 01:09:24.040
I know God has a reason for each mountain and each flower,

01:09:24.040 --> 01:09:27.729
and why He chose to let our boys get busy in the shower.

01:09:27.729 --> 01:09:29.671
Crowd: NOO-OOOH!

01:09:29.671 --> 01:09:30.984
Mr.S: They were not dirty.

01:09:30.984 --> 01:09:31.828
C: WO-OAH!

01:09:31.828 --> 01:09:33.207
Mr.S: They were not fruits!

01:09:33.207 --> 01:09:34.001
Crowd: NO-OH!

01:09:34.001 --> 01:09:38.161
Mr.S: They were just two stray laces in the Lord's big boots!

01:09:38.466 --> 01:09:42.337
Well I never cared for homos much, until I reared me one.

01:09:42.582 --> 01:09:45.202
But now I've learned to love...

01:09:45.202 --> 01:09:49.852
Mr.S: I LOVE MY DEAD GAY SON! C: HE LOVES HIS SON, HE LOVES HIS SON! HIS DEAD GAY SON!

01:09:49.852 --> 01:09:54.192
Mr.S: Now I say my boy's in heaven, and he's tannin' by the pool.

01:09:54.348 --> 01:09:58.148
The cherubim walk him and him, and Jesus says "It's cool!"

01:09:58.148 --> 01:10:02.078
They don't have crime or hatred, there's no bigotry or cursin'.

01:10:02.272 --> 01:10:07.442
Just friendly fellows dressed up like their favorite Village person!

01:10:07.783 --> 01:10:09.663
Mr.S: They were not dirty! C: NO, NO!

01:10:09.663 --> 01:10:12.233
Mr.S: They just had flair! C: WO-OAH.

01:10:12.233 --> 01:10:15.963
Mr.S: They were two bright red ribbons in the Lord's long hair!

01:10:16.280 --> 01:10:20.080
Well I used to see a homo and go reachin' for my gun.

01:10:20.080 --> 01:10:23.210
But now I've learned to love....

01:10:23.210 --> 01:10:24.440
AND FURTHER MORE!

01:10:24.504 --> 01:10:26.374
These boys were brave as hell.

01:10:26.374 --> 01:10:28.354
These boys, they knew damn well

01:10:28.354 --> 01:10:29.954
those folks would judge 'em.

01:10:29.954 --> 01:10:32.264
They were desperate to be free!

01:10:32.428 --> 01:10:34.358
They took a rebel stance,

01:10:34.358 --> 01:10:36.378
stripped to their underpants.

01:10:36.378 --> 01:10:38.378
Paul, I can't believe that you

01:10:38.378 --> 01:10:40.378
still refuse to get a clue,

01:10:40.378 --> 01:10:42.178
after all that we've been through.

01:10:42.178 --> 01:10:44.048
Mr.S: I'M TALKIN' YOU AND ME. C: [gasps]

01:10:44.048 --> 01:10:47.488
Mr.S: IN THE SUMMER OF '83. C: [GASPS]

01:11:00.876 --> 01:11:03.396
Mr.K: ...That was one hell of a fishin' trip.

01:11:05.334 --> 01:11:08.384
C: WOAH WOAH WOAH WOAH, WOAH WOAH, WOAH!

01:11:08.734 --> 01:11:12.454
THEY WERE NOT DIRTY. NO! AND NOT PERVERSE. NO, NO.

01:11:12.493 --> 01:11:16.343
THEY WERE JUST TWO STRAY RHINESTONES ON THE LORD'S BIG PURSE!

01:11:16.801 --> 01:11:20.701
Both: OUR JOB IS NOW CONTINUING THE WORK THAT THEY BEGUN.

01:11:20.963 --> 01:11:24.583
C: 'CAUSE NOW WE LOVE, LOVE, LOVE. WE LOVE YOUR DEAD--

01:11:24.583 --> 01:11:28.503
Both: They're up there disco dancing to the thump of angel wings.

01:11:28.565 --> 01:11:32.295
They grab a mate and roller skate, while Judy Garland sings.

01:11:32.401 --> 01:11:36.201
They live a playful afterlife that's fancy-free and reckless!

01:11:36.272 --> 01:11:38.220
Mr.K: They swing up on the pearly gates,

01:11:38.220 --> 01:11:41.460
All: AND WEAR A PEARLY NECKLACE!

01:11:41.560 --> 01:11:43.260
Both: THEY WERE NOT DIRTY! C: NO!

01:11:43.260 --> 01:11:45.730
Both: THEY WERE GOOD MEN! C: WOAH, WOAH.

01:11:45.800 --> 01:11:49.290
All: AND NOW THEY'RE HAPPY BEAR CUBS IN THE LORD'S BIG DEN!

01:11:54.976 --> 01:11:57.836
Mr.S: Go forth and love each other now,

01:11:58.403 --> 01:12:02.043
Both: like our boys would have done.

01:12:02.408 --> 01:12:06.958
Both: We'll teach the world to love.... C: THE WORLD TO LOVE...

01:12:06.958 --> 01:12:08.928
All: THE WORLD TO LOVE!

01:12:08.928 --> 01:12:13.028
Both: I love my dead gay son! C: NOT HALF BAD, YOUR DEAD GAY SON.

01:12:13.028 --> 01:12:15.858
Both: My son, MY SON! C: WISH I HAD A DEAD GAY SON.

01:12:15.858 --> 01:12:16.678
All: DEAD

01:12:16.678 --> 01:12:17.288
GAY

01:12:17.561 --> 01:12:24.091
SON!

01:12:48.035 --> 01:12:49.055
JD: [sniffs]

01:12:49.684 --> 01:12:50.614
What is that?

01:12:50.995 --> 01:12:53.375
That smell in the air, is that...

01:12:53.510 --> 01:12:54.910
tolerance?

01:12:57.067 --> 01:12:58.402
Inclusion.

01:12:58.402 --> 01:12:59.392
Love.

01:12:59.502 --> 01:13:02.282
How often can you say it's a good day to live in Sherwood, Ohio?

01:13:02.282 --> 01:13:04.602
JD: You're welcome, town! V: Hey.

01:13:05.415 --> 01:13:07.715
You don't have to be so smug about it.

01:13:07.715 --> 01:13:08.435
JD: No...

01:13:09.768 --> 01:13:11.028
Your love...

01:13:11.168 --> 01:13:12.928
keeps me humble.

01:13:14.402 --> 01:13:15.582
So who's next?

01:13:17.598 --> 01:13:18.618
Heather Duke?

01:13:18.738 --> 01:13:20.598
She's the one that started that three-way rumor.

01:13:20.598 --> 01:13:23.208
I've been underlining meaningful passages in her copy

01:13:23.208 --> 01:13:24.848
of Moby Dick, if you know what I mean.

01:13:24.848 --> 01:13:25.568
V: NO!

01:13:26.188 --> 01:13:27.518
No, I do NOT accept this.

01:13:27.518 --> 01:13:28.758
We've already killed three people.

01:13:28.758 --> 01:13:31.108
V: This ENDS right here, right now. JD: Or what?

01:13:31.108 --> 01:13:31.808
V: I'll...

01:13:33.233 --> 01:13:34.993
I'll break up with you.

01:13:38.178 --> 01:13:40.868
JD: Any war has casualties.

01:13:41.562 --> 01:13:43.502
Doesn't mean it's not worth fighting.

01:13:44.631 --> 01:13:45.821
What, what..

01:13:45.991 --> 01:13:47.731
you-you'd rather go to JAIL?

01:13:47.731 --> 01:13:48.301
Hm?

01:13:48.506 --> 01:13:50.956
And then give a free pass to the thugs who hurt people?

01:13:50.991 --> 01:13:52.311
Evil FUCKS

01:13:52.311 --> 01:13:54.391
that make life SO UNBEARABLE,

01:13:54.391 --> 01:13:56.791
that you can't stand to live in the world anymore?

01:13:56.791 --> 01:13:57.821
V: JD...!

01:14:03.639 --> 01:14:05.489
...How did your mother die?

01:14:07.759 --> 01:14:08.919
JD: [scoffs]

01:14:10.765 --> 01:14:12.745
JD: You really wanna know? V: Yeah..

01:14:15.403 --> 01:14:16.621
JD: My dad

01:14:17.001 --> 01:14:18.781
said it was an accident.

01:14:19.581 --> 01:14:21.621
But she knew what she was doing.

01:14:23.710 --> 01:14:25.610
She walked into that building

01:14:25.986 --> 01:14:26.946
2 minutes

01:14:26.946 --> 01:14:28.526
before dad blew it up.

01:14:30.007 --> 01:14:32.377
She waved at me out the window,

01:14:33.584 --> 01:14:34.854
and then...

01:14:35.089 --> 01:14:37.299
KABOOM...

01:14:38.334 --> 01:14:39.624
She left me.

01:14:45.906 --> 01:14:47.456
V: I'm really sorry, I...

01:14:47.456 --> 01:14:48.576
JD: It's okay.

01:14:49.369 --> 01:14:51.219
The pain gives me clarity.

01:14:51.219 --> 01:14:53.889
You and I are special, we have a lot of work to do.

01:14:53.929 --> 01:14:55.049
V: Wh-what work?

01:14:55.049 --> 01:14:57.429
JD: Making the world a decent place for people who are decent!

01:14:57.429 --> 01:15:00.329
V: When does it end?! JD: WHEN EVERY ASSHOLE IS DEAD.

01:15:05.628 --> 01:15:07.598
V: Fine, we're damaged.

01:15:07.966 --> 01:15:11.026
Really damaged, but that does not make us wise.

01:15:11.346 --> 01:15:12.836
We're not special...

01:15:13.213 --> 01:15:14.321
We're not different.

01:15:14.321 --> 01:15:16.651
We don't CHOOSE who lives or dies.

01:15:17.208 --> 01:15:18.578
Let's be normal.

01:15:19.914 --> 01:15:21.464
See bad movies...

01:15:22.461 --> 01:15:24.621
sneak a beer, and watch TV.

01:15:25.130 --> 01:15:26.750
We'll bake brownies,

01:15:26.750 --> 01:15:27.890
or go bowling...

01:15:27.890 --> 01:15:33.510
Don't you want a life with me?

01:15:34.047 --> 01:15:39.707
Can't we be seventeen?

01:15:40.137 --> 01:15:45.937
That's all I want to do.

01:15:46.444 --> 01:15:49.774
If you could let me in,

01:15:50.766 --> 01:15:54.916
I could be good with you.

01:15:55.802 --> 01:15:57.182
V: People hurt us.

01:15:57.422 --> 01:15:58.972
JD: Or they vanish.

01:15:59.033 --> 01:16:00.673
V: And you're right,

01:16:00.763 --> 01:16:02.073
it really blows.

01:16:02.443 --> 01:16:03.808
V: But we let go,

01:16:03.808 --> 01:16:05.638
JD: take a deep breath,

01:16:05.638 --> 01:16:08.808
V: and go buy some summer clothes!

01:16:08.899 --> 01:16:10.509
V: We'll go camping.

01:16:10.509 --> 01:16:12.129
JD: Play some poker.

01:16:12.129 --> 01:16:14.929
V: And we'll eat some chili fries.

01:16:15.204 --> 01:16:16.694
V: Maybe prom night!

01:16:16.694 --> 01:16:18.374
JD: Maybe dancing!

01:16:18.374 --> 01:16:21.244
V: Don't stop looking in MY EYES!

01:16:21.244 --> 01:16:23.724
JD: YOUR EYES!

01:16:24.004 --> 01:16:29.944
Both: CAN'T WE BE SEVENTEEN?

01:16:30.139 --> 01:16:35.769
IS THAT SO HARD TO DO?

01:16:36.298 --> 01:16:40.118
IF YOU COULD LET ME IN,

01:16:40.176 --> 01:16:46.246
I COULD BE GOOD WITH YOU!

01:16:46.674 --> 01:16:52.474
LET US BE SEVENTEEN,

01:16:52.866 --> 01:16:58.556
IF WE'VE STILL GOT THE RIGHT!

01:16:58.825 --> 01:17:02.295
V: SO WHAT'S IT GONNA BE?

01:17:02.605 --> 01:17:04.275
I WANNA BE WITH YOU.

01:17:04.275 --> 01:17:06.555
JD: I WANNA BE WITH YOU V: WANNA BE WITH YOU

01:17:06.642 --> 01:17:15.732
Both: TONIGHT!

01:17:23.994 --> 01:17:25.429
V: Yeah, we're damaged.

01:17:25.429 --> 01:17:27.139
JD: Badly damaged.

01:17:27.198 --> 01:17:29.688
Both: But your love's too good to lose!

01:17:30.067 --> 01:17:31.777
V: Hold me tighter.

01:17:31.849 --> 01:17:33.294
JD: Even closer.

01:17:33.294 --> 01:17:36.464
V: I'll stay if I'm what you choose!

01:17:37.320 --> 01:17:40.210
JD: Can't we be seventeen?

01:17:40.210 --> 01:17:43.665
V: If I am what you choose.

01:17:43.665 --> 01:17:46.295
JD: If we've still got the right.

01:17:46.295 --> 01:17:49.419
V: 'Cause you're the one I choose!

01:17:49.419 --> 01:17:54.429
JD: You're the one I choose.

01:17:55.703 --> 01:18:03.043
Both: You're the one I choose!

01:18:20.017 --> 01:18:23.077
H C.: And they lived happily ever after!

01:18:23.677 --> 01:18:24.786
You really believe that?

01:18:24.786 --> 01:18:27.526
You think it all goes back to normal?

01:18:27.901 --> 01:18:28.366
[scoffs]

01:18:28.426 --> 01:18:30.456
Don't give me that wounded look.

01:18:30.660 --> 01:18:32.257
You know exactly what he is,

01:18:32.257 --> 01:18:34.007
and you LOVE it.

01:18:34.007 --> 01:18:35.387
V: Just stop talking.

01:18:35.474 --> 01:18:38.474
H C.: Only a true dead best friend would give it to you straight!

01:18:39.000 --> 01:18:40.110
M: Veronica, I need your help!

01:18:40.110 --> 01:18:41.277
V: Sure! What?

01:18:41.487 --> 01:18:42.917
M: Something doesn't add up.

01:18:42.997 --> 01:18:45.097
I think Ram and Kurt were murdered.

01:18:45.422 --> 01:18:49.032
H C.: Well FUCK ME gently with a chainsaw!

01:18:52.341 --> 01:18:55.591
Nancy Drew is onto you, Veronica!

01:18:56.850 --> 01:18:57.853
V: Why would you say that?

01:18:57.853 --> 01:18:59.313
They found a suicide note.

01:18:59.313 --> 01:19:00.630
M: Well, it could've been faked!

01:19:00.630 --> 01:19:02.733
You forge stuff all the time, right?

01:19:02.833 --> 01:19:03.363
V: Right...

01:19:03.413 --> 01:19:05.264
H C.: I am in love

01:19:05.264 --> 01:19:07.514
with this fat girl!

01:19:08.492 --> 01:19:09.420
V: That's ridiculous,

01:19:09.420 --> 01:19:10.690
who'd wanna kill Ram and Kurt?

01:19:10.690 --> 01:19:12.580
M: I'm thinking it was your friend JD.

01:19:12.580 --> 01:19:14.710
You saw the way he went after them in the lunch room.

01:19:14.839 --> 01:19:16.919
K: Yeah, man. That sucked!

01:19:16.999 --> 01:19:19.389
M: There's something off about that JD.

01:19:19.389 --> 01:19:22.589
R: Looks like Veronica's going to lady prison.

01:19:22.769 --> 01:19:24.199
Girl on girl!

01:19:24.209 --> 01:19:29.849
K: PUNCH IT IN! K&R: [moaning]

01:19:36.325 --> 01:19:37.915
M: I wanna look in JD's locker.

01:19:37.915 --> 01:19:40.035
I thought maybe you could get me the combination!

01:19:40.035 --> 01:19:42.845
H C.: I bet there's all kinds of interesting things in that locker!

01:19:42.845 --> 01:19:45.345
[gasp] Maybe some "Ich Lüge" bullets?

01:19:45.345 --> 01:19:47.403
V: This is a pretty wild theory, Martha.

01:19:47.403 --> 01:19:49.293
M: I don't care what they were saying at the funeral.

01:19:49.293 --> 01:19:50.733
Ram was not gay!

01:19:50.733 --> 01:19:52.323
M: I'd stake my life on it!

01:19:52.323 --> 01:19:53.083
K: HAHA!

01:19:53.083 --> 01:19:55.053
Ram's a fatty magnet!

01:19:55.103 --> 01:19:56.823
R: Yeah? At least I don't have skid marks.

01:19:56.823 --> 01:19:57.633
K: Bullshit.

01:19:57.633 --> 01:20:00.293
R: SKID MARKS! SKID MARKS! YOU HAVE SKID MARKS! K: FATTY MAGNET! FATTY MAGNET!

01:20:00.293 --> 01:20:01.703
V: STOP IT, STOP IT! STOP IT.

01:20:01.703 --> 01:20:03.123
M: Stop what?!

01:20:03.123 --> 01:20:05.183
Veronica, what's wrong with you!?

01:20:05.183 --> 01:20:07.613
V: Sorry.. I'm really sorry, I'm just.. I'm trying to understand, okay?

01:20:07.613 --> 01:20:09.863
But Ram was gay, why would you think anything else?

01:20:09.863 --> 01:20:11.363
M: He kissed me. Remember?

01:20:11.363 --> 01:20:13.303
On the kickball field? V: Yeah, in kindergarten.

01:20:13.303 --> 01:20:16.133
M: My heart knows the truth. H C.: Time to choose, Veronica.

01:20:16.133 --> 01:20:17.513
Eat or be eaten.

01:20:17.513 --> 01:20:20.173
M: Why would Ram write me that note if he didn't still feel something?

01:20:20.173 --> 01:20:21.353
H C.: You know what to say!

01:20:21.353 --> 01:20:23.323
M: Why would he invite me to his homecoming party?

01:20:23.323 --> 01:20:24.553
I'm gonna confront JD.

01:20:24.553 --> 01:20:27.043
V: No, please don't! H C.: DO YOU HAVE THE GUTS?

01:20:28.246 --> 01:20:31.716
V: [laughs]

01:20:31.916 --> 01:20:34.666
Oh, you floor me, Martha, you really do.

01:20:35.308 --> 01:20:37.098
M: W-what do you mean?

01:20:38.159 --> 01:20:40.579
V: Ram didn't write that love note, I did.

01:20:42.407 --> 01:20:43.477
M: [laughs]

01:20:43.517 --> 01:20:45.017
No...?

01:20:45.887 --> 01:20:46.517
V: Yeah.

01:20:47.947 --> 01:20:49.697
The Heathers put me up to it. The whole

01:20:49.697 --> 01:20:51.807
school was in on the joke and no one

01:20:51.807 --> 01:20:53.527
laughed harder than Ram.

01:20:54.303 --> 01:20:56.133
He didn't love you.

01:20:56.971 --> 01:20:58.311
He was a DICK.

01:20:58.956 --> 01:21:00.466
And now he's dead.

01:21:02.091 --> 01:21:03.081
Move on.

01:21:09.957 --> 01:21:11.047
...Shit.

01:21:12.887 --> 01:21:14.487
No. Look, I had to hurt her, okay?

01:21:14.487 --> 01:21:16.257
If JD caught her going through his stuff,

01:21:16.257 --> 01:21:17.607
V: he would-- H C.: KILL HER?

01:21:17.607 --> 01:21:20.707
[gasps] Is that what you're afraid of?

01:21:21.325 --> 01:21:24.425
I thought the desperado hung up his six guns.

01:21:25.364 --> 01:21:27.974
Don't you trust him?

01:21:29.219 --> 01:21:31.178
Ms.F: VERONICA! There you are!

01:21:31.178 --> 01:21:32.668
I need you girls in place for the assembly.

01:21:32.668 --> 01:21:34.818
V: Ohh right, this thing! Christ.

01:21:34.968 --> 01:21:36.178
Ms.F: Alright, it's pedal to the metal!

01:21:36.178 --> 01:21:38.018
Come on now! Show some muscle.

01:21:38.047 --> 01:21:39.947
H M.: I'm kinda looking forward to this!

01:21:39.967 --> 01:21:42.387
H D.: Did you have a brain tumor for breakfast?

01:21:43.023 --> 01:21:44.463
H M.: Sorry, Heather....

01:21:47.842 --> 01:21:50.772
Ms.F: Helloooo, Westerburg!

01:21:54.373 --> 01:21:58.223
Let's try that one more time! HELLOOOO, WESTERBURG!

01:22:00.586 --> 01:22:03.596
There's the spirit! Oh, you all look so lovely.

01:22:03.722 --> 01:22:06.472
Welcome to this very special assembly.

01:22:06.975 --> 01:22:09.595
Now, I want you to ignore the television

01:22:09.595 --> 01:22:11.045
cameras and the news crews.

01:22:11.045 --> 01:22:14.215
They're just here to document this significant moment.

01:22:15.551 --> 01:22:18.541
Whether to kill yourself or not is one of the most important decisions

01:22:18.541 --> 01:22:20.231
a teenager can make.

01:22:21.484 --> 01:22:22.874
Yes, yes.

01:22:22.962 --> 01:22:25.502
So! You know what I'm going to do right now?

01:22:25.502 --> 01:22:27.432
Boy: Kill yourself on stage?

01:22:30.482 --> 01:22:32.392
Ms.F: That's not productive, Dwight.

01:22:33.488 --> 01:22:37.848
Now, my senior thesis at Berkeley was on the subject of--

01:22:38.518 --> 01:22:39.918
Thank you.

01:22:42.611 --> 01:22:46.531
--was on the subject of Pediatric Psychotherapeutic Musicology.

01:22:50.078 --> 01:22:52.258
It was terrifically well-regarded,

01:22:52.258 --> 01:22:55.168
so I speak with some authority when I tell you that

01:22:55.168 --> 01:22:57.748
the way to eliminate suicide

01:22:57.748 --> 01:23:00.718
is by first eliminating fear.

01:23:01.248 --> 01:23:05.338
By creating a safe zone in which we all are equal!

01:23:06.112 --> 01:23:10.102
Deep inside of everyone, there's a hot ball of shame.

01:23:10.358 --> 01:23:14.268
Guilt, regret, anxiety, fears we dare not name!

01:23:14.354 --> 01:23:18.394
But if we show the ugly parts that we hide away,

01:23:18.821 --> 01:23:23.851
they turn out to be beautiful by the light of day!

01:23:23.851 --> 01:23:27.251
Why not shine, shine, shine a light

01:23:27.251 --> 01:23:28.851
on your deepest fears!

01:23:28.851 --> 01:23:31.211
Let in sunlight now,

01:23:31.211 --> 01:23:33.211
and your pain will disappear!

01:23:33.211 --> 01:23:36.813
Shine, shine, shine, and your scars and your flaws

01:23:36.813 --> 01:23:40.143
will look lovely because you shine

01:23:40.210 --> 01:23:43.910
You shine a light!

01:23:45.792 --> 01:23:49.792
Girl: Everyday's a battlefield, when pride's on the line.

01:23:50.102 --> 01:23:54.042
Boy: I attack your weaknesses, and pray you don't see mine!

01:23:54.162 --> 01:23:56.206
Boy: But if I share my ugly parts,

01:23:56.206 --> 01:23:58.206
Girl: and you show me yours,

01:23:58.206 --> 01:24:00.561
Boy: Our love can knock our walls down,

01:24:00.561 --> 01:24:03.501
and unlock all our doors!

01:24:03.501 --> 01:24:08.291
Come on, shine, shine, shine a light on your deepest fears!

01:24:08.291 --> 01:24:12.319
Let in sunlight now, and your pain will disappear!

01:24:12.319 --> 01:24:14.719
Who wants to share what's in their heart?

01:24:14.719 --> 01:24:16.379
No volunteers? Fine, I'll start.

01:24:16.379 --> 01:24:18.609
My name's Pauleen. I live alone.

01:24:18.609 --> 01:24:21.186
My husband left, my kids are grown.

01:24:21.186 --> 01:24:23.306
In the 60's, love was free!

01:24:23.306 --> 01:24:25.346
That did not work out well for me.

01:24:25.346 --> 01:24:26.978
The revolution came and went.

01:24:26.978 --> 01:24:29.518
Tried to change the world, barely made a dent.

01:24:29.518 --> 01:24:31.558
I have struggled with despair!

01:24:31.558 --> 01:24:33.538
I've joined a cult, chopped off my hair,

01:24:33.538 --> 01:24:35.598
I chant, I pray, but God's not there,

01:24:35.598 --> 01:24:37.818
so Steve, I'm ending our affair!

01:25:00.425 --> 01:25:02.085
Audience member: ...I'm sorry?

01:25:06.288 --> 01:25:09.838
Ms.F: Might be a bad time to mention that I faked it every time.

01:25:12.439 --> 01:25:15.519
Awwww!

01:25:17.002 --> 01:25:19.130
Now we're letting each other go!

01:25:19.130 --> 01:25:21.880
That feels fan-freakin'-tastic!

01:25:22.868 --> 01:25:27.474
Ms.F: One, two, take me home, kids! S: SHINE, SHINE, SHINE A LIGHT!

01:25:27.474 --> 01:25:33.404
Ms.F: ON YOUR DEEPEST FEARS, AND YOUR PAIN WILL DISAPPEAR.

01:25:33.410 --> 01:25:37.290
S: SHINE, SHINE, SHINE, Ms.F: AND YOUR SCARS AND YOUR FLAWS

01:25:37.290 --> 01:25:40.390
All: WILL LOOK LOVELY BECAUSE YOU SHINE

01:25:40.420 --> 01:25:42.960
S: YOU SHINE

01:25:42.960 --> 01:25:45.960
Ms.F: SHINE A LIGHT!

01:25:45.960 --> 01:25:47.950
All: SHINE, SHINE, SHINE A LIGHT!

01:25:47.950 --> 01:25:51.415
All: SHINE, SHINE, SHINE, A LIGHT! Ms.F: Yeah!

01:25:51.795 --> 01:25:58.154
All: SHINE, SHINE, SHINE A LIGHT!

01:25:58.494 --> 01:26:00.144
SHINE A LIGHT!

01:26:10.775 --> 01:26:12.545
Okay, kids! Come on, now!

01:26:12.545 --> 01:26:16.116
I want you to work with me, I want you to share your pain.

01:26:16.116 --> 01:26:19.546
I want you to drag it out into the light where we all can take a look at it.

01:26:19.546 --> 01:26:22.186
H M.: I've thought about killing myself!

01:26:23.064 --> 01:26:24.404
H D.: What the hell are you doing-?!

01:26:24.404 --> 01:26:26.394
Ms.F: No-no-no-no-no....

01:26:27.626 --> 01:26:30.190
Keep talking, Heather, you're in a safe place.

01:26:30.190 --> 01:26:34.010
It's just you and me and the classmates who love you.

01:26:35.077 --> 01:26:37.357
Share! It's gonna be ok.

01:26:38.295 --> 01:26:39.835
H D.: Heather, get back in line!

01:26:39.835 --> 01:26:40.975
Ms.F: Zip it!

01:26:42.388 --> 01:26:44.324
H M.: The last guy I slept with killed himself

01:26:44.324 --> 01:26:46.664
because he was gay for his linebacker.

01:26:47.372 --> 01:26:47.967
And...

01:26:47.977 --> 01:26:52.437
my best friend seemed to have it all together, but now she's gone too.

01:26:52.742 --> 01:26:55.677
And now my stomach hurts worse and worse...

01:26:55.677 --> 01:26:58.956
And every morning on the bus, I feel my heart beating louder and faster,

01:26:58.956 --> 01:27:01.130
and I'm like "Jesus, I'm on the frickin' bus again

01:27:01.130 --> 01:27:03.690
'cause all my rides to school are dead."

01:27:15.715 --> 01:27:18.416
I float in a boat...

01:27:18.416 --> 01:27:20.958
in a raging black ocean.

01:27:20.958 --> 01:27:25.108
Low in the water, and nowhere to go.

01:27:26.232 --> 01:27:29.192
The tiniest life boat...

01:27:29.556 --> 01:27:31.726
with people I know.

01:27:32.983 --> 01:27:36.124
Cold, clammy, and crowded,

01:27:36.214 --> 01:27:38.404
the people smell desperate.

01:27:38.454 --> 01:27:42.624
We'll sink any minute, so someone must go....

01:27:43.832 --> 01:27:46.212
The tiniest lifeboat...

01:27:46.968 --> 01:27:49.508
with people I know.

01:27:50.487 --> 01:27:54.325
EVERYONE'S PUSHING! EVERYONE'S FIGHTING!

01:27:54.325 --> 01:27:58.015
STORMS ARE APPROACHING, THERE'S NOWHERE TO HIDE!

01:27:58.210 --> 01:28:02.210
IF I SAY THE WRONG THING, OR I WEAR THE WRONG OUTFIT,

01:28:02.443 --> 01:28:07.633
THEY'LL THROW ME RIGHT OVER THE SIDE!

01:28:08.057 --> 01:28:12.827
I'm.. hugging my knees, and the captain is pointing.

01:28:13.017 --> 01:28:15.577
Well, who made HER captain?!

01:28:15.875 --> 01:28:19.105
Still, the weakest must go....

01:28:20.835 --> 01:28:23.415
The tiniest lifeboat...

01:28:24.748 --> 01:28:28.748
full of people I know.

01:28:29.473 --> 01:28:32.053
The tiniest lifeboat...

01:28:33.720 --> 01:28:43.130
full of people I know....

01:28:58.388 --> 01:29:00.742
H D.: What's your damage, Heather?! Are you saying Westerburg

01:29:00.742 --> 01:29:02.358
H D.: is not a nice place? Ms.F: Heather!

01:29:02.358 --> 01:29:05.918
H D.: Where's your school spirit?! You don't deserve to wear our school colors.

01:29:06.474 --> 01:29:10.754
Why don't you hop in your little lifeboat, and catch a gnarly wave over to Bennington!

01:29:11.712 --> 01:29:14.637
Ms.F: Alright! Let's calm it down! Girl: Aww, look!

01:29:14.637 --> 01:29:16.949
Girl: Ohh, Heather's gonna cryyy~.

01:29:16.949 --> 01:29:19.885
S: [cooing mockingly]

01:29:19.885 --> 01:29:22.765
Ms.F: YOUNG LADY, YOU ARE SUSPENDED.

01:29:23.170 --> 01:29:26.019
Turn the cameras off. Turn 'em off, goddamnit!

01:29:26.019 --> 01:29:28.710
V: Is that all you care about? TV cameras?

01:29:28.710 --> 01:29:31.191
Ms.F: I care about saving lives!

01:29:31.191 --> 01:29:33.001
Heather Duke ruined a valuable teach--

01:29:33.001 --> 01:29:35.612
V: VALUABLE?! None of us want this spectacle.

01:29:35.612 --> 01:29:39.173
To be experimented on like guinea pigs, and patronized like bunny rabbits!

01:29:39.323 --> 01:29:43.183
Ms.F: I don't patronize bunny rabbits!

01:29:44.150 --> 01:29:46.662
H C.: This is their big secret, Veronica!

01:29:46.662 --> 01:29:48.355
The adults are powerless.

01:29:48.505 --> 01:29:50.085
V: Heather trusted you.

01:29:50.335 --> 01:29:51.955
You said that you would protect her.

01:29:51.955 --> 01:29:54.549
H C.: They can't help us. Nobody can help us.

01:29:54.549 --> 01:29:56.982
V: You're useless. H C.: We're alone in the ocean!

01:29:56.982 --> 01:29:59.092
V: And all of you are idiots! JD: You should sit down now.

01:29:59.092 --> 01:30:01.019
V: NO! Heather was a monster, just like Kurt and Ram,

01:30:01.019 --> 01:30:03.309
and they didn't kill themselves, I KILLED THEM.

01:30:15.841 --> 01:30:17.691
What do you all think of that...?

01:30:19.595 --> 01:30:23.395
S: [scoff and laugh]

01:30:23.395 --> 01:30:27.975
H D.: Some people will say anything if they think it'll make them popular!

01:30:30.023 --> 01:30:31.123
JD: VERONICA!

01:30:32.783 --> 01:30:35.343
H M.: Stupid child-proof caps!

01:30:37.228 --> 01:30:41.447
H D.: Aww, look! Heather's going to All: WHINE, WHINE, WHINE ALL NIGHT.

01:30:41.447 --> 01:30:43.281
H D.: You don't deserve to live.

01:30:43.281 --> 01:30:46.888
All: WHY NOT KILL YOURSELF? H D.: Here, have a sedative.

01:30:46.888 --> 01:30:50.452
All: WHINE, WHINE, WHINE H D.: like there's no Santa Claus.

01:30:50.452 --> 01:30:53.569
All: YOU'RE PATHETIC BECAUSE YOU WHINE,

01:30:53.569 --> 01:30:54.988
H D.: You whine all night!

01:30:54.988 --> 01:30:56.827
S: WHIIIIINE. H D.: Your ass is off the team.

01:30:56.877 --> 01:30:58.789
S: WHIIIIINE. H D.: Go on and bitch and moan.

01:30:58.859 --> 01:31:00.749
S: WHIIIIINE. H D.: You don't deserve the dream.

01:31:00.828 --> 01:31:02.565
S: WHIIIIINE. H D.: You're gonna die alone.

01:31:02.565 --> 01:31:06.235
All: DIE ALONE! DIE ALONE! DIE ALONE! DIE ALONE!

01:31:07.597 --> 01:31:08.177
V: NO!

01:31:08.273 --> 01:31:09.893
No, no, no. Stop, stop!

01:31:10.595 --> 01:31:12.885
H M.: Suicide is a private thing!

01:31:18.128 --> 01:31:21.316
V: You're throwing your life away to become a statistic in USA Today?

01:31:21.316 --> 01:31:23.906
That's like the least private thing that I can think of!

01:31:24.225 --> 01:31:26.805
H M.: But what about Heather and Ram and Kurt?

01:31:27.548 --> 01:31:30.608
V: If everyone jumped off a bridge, young lady, would you?

01:31:31.278 --> 01:31:32.968
H M.: ...Probably.

01:31:37.350 --> 01:31:41.850
V: If you were happy every single day of your life then you wouldn't be human.

01:31:41.971 --> 01:31:43.911
You'd be a game show host.

01:31:50.811 --> 01:31:52.721
H M.: Thanks for coming after me.

01:31:53.151 --> 01:31:54.471
V: Oh, you're welcome!

01:32:06.696 --> 01:32:09.984
[JD clapping]

01:32:09.984 --> 01:32:11.774
JD: You are a genius!

01:32:12.062 --> 01:32:15.411
You had me worried with your little.. confession there, but you pulled it off.

01:32:15.461 --> 01:32:17.617
Best place to hide, right in plain sight.

01:32:17.617 --> 01:32:19.786
V: No, I wasn't trying to hide.

01:32:19.916 --> 01:32:21.561
JD: Why'd you have to meddle with MacNamara?

01:32:21.561 --> 01:32:23.243
One more dead Heather's a good thing!

01:32:23.243 --> 01:32:24.823
V: No, she's my friend!

01:32:24.864 --> 01:32:26.868
JD: Okay, if she's your friend, then why are we letting DUKE live?

01:32:26.868 --> 01:32:28.713
The bitch that made MacNamara wanna KILL herself.

01:32:28.713 --> 01:32:31.034
JD: You see, nothing ever CHANGES unless you-- V: Hey, we're out of the

01:32:31.034 --> 01:32:33.183
V: change business, ok?! JD: Oh, so we're gonna just let Duke run

01:32:33.183 --> 01:32:34.783
JD: around spreading the same old lies V: No! No, [arguing]

01:32:34.783 --> 01:32:37.960
JD: to ALL THOSE PEOPLE because all that does-- V: Listen, listen, listen, listen....

01:32:39.121 --> 01:32:39.931
V: Just...

01:32:39.959 --> 01:32:41.649
don't talk over me, okay?

01:32:44.550 --> 01:32:46.070
You promised me.

01:32:48.249 --> 01:32:49.419
JD: I promised.

01:32:50.181 --> 01:32:51.171
V: Thank you....

01:32:57.010 --> 01:33:01.010
Mr.D: Gee, Pop, ever heard of knockin'? I was playin' grab-ass with my girlfriend.

01:33:01.976 --> 01:33:03.516
JD: Well, you know the rules, young man.

01:33:03.516 --> 01:33:05.866
When company's over, the bedroom door stays open.

01:33:07.955 --> 01:33:10.752
Mr.D: So the judge, God bless 'em, told those [something] groupees

01:33:10.752 --> 01:33:14.182
to suck(?) shit and die! Ha, you should've seen the fireworks.

01:33:14.280 --> 01:33:15.910
I got it all right here on video.

01:33:16.295 --> 01:33:19.672
I packed the upper floor with thermals, set off the whole thing with

01:33:19.672 --> 01:33:21.902
a Norwegian(?) in the boiler room.

01:33:22.257 --> 01:33:24.217
KABOOM.

01:33:25.798 --> 01:33:26.778
Right back(?).

01:33:27.098 --> 01:33:29.918
I'm gonna want my drawstring pants for this!

01:33:39.955 --> 01:33:40.615
[shoots gun]

01:33:40.615 --> 01:33:43.785
Mr.D: GODDAMNIT! NO FIREARMS IN THE HOUSE.

01:33:43.785 --> 01:33:46.645
JD: [laughing] V: Why are you carrying a gun?!

01:33:46.997 --> 01:33:48.580
JD: It pissed off my dad, it was funny!

01:33:48.580 --> 01:33:52.030
V: No, it's not funny! None of this is funny. You're carrying a loaded weapon!

01:33:53.015 --> 01:33:53.974
V: You promised me.

01:33:53.974 --> 01:33:55.145
JD: Hey, it's a dangerous world.

01:33:55.145 --> 01:33:56.525
V: Yeah, because of you.

01:33:58.254 --> 01:33:59.784
You know what, don't call me.

01:33:59.784 --> 01:34:01.024
V: Don't talk to me. JD: Veronica...!

01:34:01.024 --> 01:34:03.359
V: No, you don't understand the difference between right and wrong!

01:34:03.359 --> 01:34:04.818
JD: Come ON, come back!

01:34:04.818 --> 01:34:06.918
V: No, we're over! JD: But I love you!

01:34:13.835 --> 01:34:15.115
V: Goodbye, JD.

01:34:23.905 --> 01:34:26.264
Students: WO-O-O-O-OAH!

01:34:26.264 --> 01:34:28.066
H M.: Tomorrow night's the pep rally!

01:34:28.066 --> 01:34:30.786
S: WO-O-O-O-OAH!

01:34:30.855 --> 01:34:32.285
H M.: Let's get psyched!

01:34:32.371 --> 01:34:36.181
All: HEY-O, WESTERBURG! TELL ME, WHAT'S THAT SOUND?

01:34:36.482 --> 01:34:40.482
HERE COMES WESTERBURG, COMIN' TA PUT YOU IN THE GROUND.

01:34:40.697 --> 01:34:44.697
GO GO, WESTERBURG! GIVE A GREAT BIG YELL.

01:34:44.889 --> 01:34:48.889
WESTERBURG WILL KNOCK YOU OUT, AND SEND YOU STRAIGHT TO HELL!

01:34:53.218 --> 01:34:54.918
JD: "I now know thee,

01:34:55.375 --> 01:34:56.805
thou clear spirit."

01:34:57.223 --> 01:34:58.606
H D.: That's from Moby Dick.

01:34:58.606 --> 01:35:00.281
JD: I appreciate a well-read woman.

01:35:00.281 --> 01:35:02.411
H D.: [scoffs] What's in the envelope?

01:35:03.121 --> 01:35:03.951
Oh crap!

01:35:04.241 --> 01:35:08.421
JD: Just a tangible reminder that at one point at around age 6, I'm guessing?

01:35:08.665 --> 01:35:10.696
You and Martha Dunstock were FRIENDS!

01:35:10.696 --> 01:35:13.986
H D.: Where'd you get these pictures?! Did Veronica give them to you?

01:35:14.018 --> 01:35:16.268
[scoffs] What do you want, money?

01:35:19.626 --> 01:35:20.646
JD: A favor.

01:35:20.920 --> 01:35:22.570
H D.: No way. [scoffs]

01:35:23.209 --> 01:35:26.669
JD: Oh, I really love this one of you and Martha in the bath tub together?

01:35:28.353 --> 01:35:32.193
H D.: These photos are ancient history. Nobody cares about the past!

01:35:32.252 --> 01:35:35.822
Nobody cares about Martha Dumptruck.

01:35:46.537 --> 01:35:49.747
M: There was a boy I met in kindergarten.

01:35:50.998 --> 01:35:54.098
He was sweet, he said that I was smart.

01:35:55.026 --> 01:35:57.876
He was good at sports, and people liked him.

01:35:58.821 --> 01:36:01.811
And at naptime once, we shared a mat.

01:36:02.887 --> 01:36:04.169
I didn't sleep,

01:36:04.169 --> 01:36:06.239
I sat and watched him breathing.

01:36:07.304 --> 01:36:10.294
Watched him dream for nearly half an hour.

01:36:11.726 --> 01:36:15.436
Oooooh...

01:36:16.045 --> 01:36:17.235
Then he woke up.

01:36:19.957 --> 01:36:23.547
He pulled a scab off one time playing kickball.

01:36:24.341 --> 01:36:25.558
Kissed me quick,

01:36:25.558 --> 01:36:27.538
then pressed it in my hand.

01:36:28.260 --> 01:36:31.110
I took that scab and put it in a locket.

01:36:32.454 --> 01:36:35.534
All year long, I wore it near my heart.

01:36:36.481 --> 01:36:40.041
He didn't care if I was thin or pretty.

01:36:40.661 --> 01:36:44.421
And he was mine until we hit first grade.

01:36:44.989 --> 01:36:49.099
Oooooh...

01:36:49.538 --> 01:36:50.938
Then he woke up.

01:36:53.203 --> 01:36:58.069
Last night I dreamed a horse with wings

01:36:58.069 --> 01:37:02.779
flew down into my homeroom.

01:37:02.866 --> 01:37:07.546
On its back, there he sat,

01:37:07.636 --> 01:37:12.136
and he held out his arms.

01:37:12.526 --> 01:37:16.556
So we sailed above the gym,

01:37:16.915 --> 01:37:21.315
across the faculty parking lot.

01:37:22.025 --> 01:37:30.095
My kindergarten boyfriend and I...

01:37:30.641 --> 01:37:32.421
and a horse with wings!

01:37:35.394 --> 01:37:38.954
Now we're all grown up and we know better.

01:37:39.822 --> 01:37:43.472
Now we recognize the way things are.

01:37:44.199 --> 01:37:47.539
Certain boys are just for kindergarten.

01:37:48.387 --> 01:37:52.387
Certain girls are meant to be alone.

01:38:05.725 --> 01:38:10.015
But I believe that any dream worth having,

01:38:10.638 --> 01:38:14.198
is a dream that should not have to end.

01:38:14.833 --> 01:38:18.833
So I'll build a dream that I can live in,

01:38:19.093 --> 01:38:25.483
and this time I'm never waking up!

01:38:25.848 --> 01:38:30.240
And we'll soar above the trees,

01:38:30.290 --> 01:38:34.430
over cars and croquet lawns,

01:38:34.760 --> 01:38:39.523
past the church, and the lake,

01:38:39.563 --> 01:38:43.683
and the tri-county mall.

01:38:43.773 --> 01:38:48.470
We will fly through the dawn

01:38:48.470 --> 01:38:55.980
to a new kindergarten!

01:38:56.962 --> 01:39:03.982
Where naptime is centuries long.

01:39:06.278 --> 01:39:14.618
Oooooh, oooooh.

01:39:15.139 --> 01:39:26.009
Oooo-oooo-oo-ooh...

01:39:45.025 --> 01:39:45.903
H D.: Hey guys!

01:39:45.903 --> 01:39:47.843
Missed you after 8th period!

01:39:47.918 --> 01:39:49.598
V: We were avoiding you.

01:39:51.592 --> 01:39:53.152
H M.: What you did to me sucked!

01:39:53.152 --> 01:39:55.964
H D.: Oh, very very. Here, I need you both to sign this.

01:39:55.964 --> 01:39:56.950
V: What is that?

01:39:56.950 --> 01:39:59.964
H D.: It's a petition to have the governor to declare a day of remembrance

01:39:59.964 --> 01:40:01.994
to honor the victims of suicide.

01:40:02.110 --> 01:40:05.900
I've gotten everybody to sign it, even the dweebs and losers.

01:40:05.957 --> 01:40:07.357
V: I'm not signing that.

01:40:07.650 --> 01:40:10.530
H D.: Veronica, why are you pulling my dick?

01:40:10.981 --> 01:40:13.091
It was your boyfriend's idea.

01:40:13.347 --> 01:40:14.177
V: Wait, JD?

01:40:14.213 --> 01:40:16.169
H D.: He made up the signature sheet and everything.

01:40:16.169 --> 01:40:16.999
V: Hold on....

01:40:19.296 --> 01:40:20.156
Look, I...

01:40:20.548 --> 01:40:22.756
I don't know what JD is up to, but if you know what's good for you,

01:40:22.756 --> 01:40:24.812
please, just... throw that away.

01:40:24.812 --> 01:40:26.183
H D.: [scoffs] Not a chance.

01:40:26.183 --> 01:40:29.223
I'll just fake your signature like I did with Martha Dumptruck.

01:40:29.694 --> 01:40:32.424
She's in no shape to sign anything today.

01:40:33.059 --> 01:40:33.944
V: Why not?

01:40:33.944 --> 01:40:35.264
H D.: It was on the radio!

01:40:35.483 --> 01:40:38.520
She took a bellyflop off the Old Mill Bridge last night,

01:40:38.520 --> 01:40:40.545
holding a suicide note.

01:40:40.545 --> 01:40:41.825
V: Oh my god....

01:40:42.515 --> 01:40:44.705
V: Wait, is she ok-- H D.: Just some broken bones!

01:40:44.785 --> 01:40:50.535
Just another geek trying to imitate the popular people, and failing miserably.

01:40:51.170 --> 01:40:54.474
Ghosts: Yo, girl. Keep it together.

01:40:54.584 --> 01:40:57.854
I knew you would come far.

01:40:57.973 --> 01:41:01.233
Now you're truly a Heather.

01:41:01.423 --> 01:41:04.493
Smell how gangsta you are.

01:41:11.867 --> 01:41:13.497
V: Martha, I'm so sorry....

01:41:13.649 --> 01:41:16.799
G: Yo, girl. Feel a bit punchy?

01:41:16.952 --> 01:41:19.942
She's not looking so well.

01:41:20.099 --> 01:41:23.429
Still, you've earned that red scrunchie.

01:41:23.540 --> 01:41:26.600
Come join Heather in hell.

01:41:27.301 --> 01:41:29.780
Mr.S: Where have you been? Mrs.S: We've been worried sick!

01:41:29.780 --> 01:41:33.252
And your friend JD stopped by, he told us everything.

01:41:33.292 --> 01:41:34.086
V: Everything?

01:41:34.086 --> 01:41:36.272
Mr.S: Your depression, your thoughts of suicide...

01:41:36.272 --> 01:41:38.752
Mrs.S: He even showed us your copy of Moby Dick.

01:41:40.893 --> 01:41:43.333
H C.: He's got your handwriting down cold!

01:41:43.364 --> 01:41:45.210
Mrs.S: Please, honey, talk to us.

01:41:45.210 --> 01:41:47.400
V: No, you wouldn't understand. Mrs.S: Try me!

01:41:47.702 --> 01:41:50.847
Look, I've experienced everything you're going through right now.

01:41:50.847 --> 01:41:53.507
I know it all seems impossibly dramatic.

01:41:54.391 --> 01:41:57.861
G: GUESS WHO'S RIGHT DOWN THE BLOCK. S: Your problems seem like life and death

01:41:57.912 --> 01:42:01.232
G: GUESS WHO'S CLIMBING THE STAIRS. Mrs.S: But I promise, they're not.

01:42:01.335 --> 01:42:04.587
G: GUESS WHO'S PICKING YOUR LOCK. V: You dont know what my world looks like!

01:42:04.587 --> 01:42:08.226
G: TIME'S UP, GO SAY YOUR PRAYERS! Mrs.S: HAVE A NICE DAY!

01:42:08.226 --> 01:42:11.806
G: Veronica's running on, running on fumes now. Veronica's totally fried!

01:42:11.893 --> 01:42:15.473
Veronica's gotta be tripping on shrooms now, thinkin' that she can hide!

01:42:15.560 --> 01:42:19.220
Veronica's done for, there's no doubt now. Notify next of kin.

01:42:19.357 --> 01:42:21.554
Veronica's trying to keep him out now,

01:42:21.554 --> 01:42:22.931
TOO LATE, he got in.

01:42:22.931 --> 01:42:24.161
JD: Knock, knock!

01:42:26.729 --> 01:42:28.446
Sorry to come in through the window.

01:42:28.746 --> 01:42:30.496
Dreadful etiquette, I know.

01:42:32.104 --> 01:42:33.574
V: Get out of my house.

01:42:33.725 --> 01:42:35.885
JD: Hiding in the closet? [laughs]

01:42:36.041 --> 01:42:37.401
Come ooon!

01:42:37.815 --> 01:42:38.730
Open the door!

01:42:38.730 --> 01:42:40.820
V: No, I'll scream. My parents will call the police.

01:42:40.940 --> 01:42:42.550
JD: All is forgiven, baby!

01:42:42.622 --> 01:42:45.692
Come on out and get dressed. You're my date for the pep rally tonight.

01:42:46.070 --> 01:42:47.160
V: What? Why?!

01:42:47.740 --> 01:42:50.180
JD: Well, our classmates thought they were signing a petition.

01:42:51.014 --> 01:42:53.414
You gotta come out here and see what they really signed!

01:42:53.850 --> 01:42:55.914
You chucked me out like I was trash,

01:42:55.914 --> 01:42:57.814
for that you should be dead.

01:42:57.814 --> 01:42:58.961
But, but, but!

01:42:58.961 --> 01:43:01.136
Then it hit me like a flash:

01:43:01.206 --> 01:43:03.986
"What if high school went away instead?"

01:43:03.986 --> 01:43:05.976
Those assholes are the key!

01:43:06.132 --> 01:43:08.302
They're keeping you away from me!

01:43:08.408 --> 01:43:09.647
They made you blind,

01:43:09.647 --> 01:43:12.657
messed up your mind. But I can set you free!

01:43:13.166 --> 01:43:15.511
You left me and I fell apart,

01:43:15.511 --> 01:43:17.271
I punched the wall and cried.

01:43:17.271 --> 01:43:18.392
BAM, BAM, BAM!

01:43:18.392 --> 01:43:20.636
Then I found you changed my heart,

01:43:20.636 --> 01:43:23.326
and set loose all that truth bullshit inside!

01:43:23.505 --> 01:43:25.450
And so I built a bomb.

01:43:25.450 --> 01:43:27.720
Tonight our school is Vietnam.

01:43:27.831 --> 01:43:31.871
Let's guarantee they never see their senior prom!

01:43:32.402 --> 01:43:36.472
I was meant to be yours!

01:43:36.552 --> 01:43:40.552
We were meant to be one!

01:43:40.646 --> 01:43:44.696
Don't give up on me now,

01:43:44.762 --> 01:43:48.762
finish what we've begun!

01:43:48.762 --> 01:43:52.505
I was meant to be yours!

01:43:52.542 --> 01:43:54.860
So when the high school goes BOOM!

01:43:54.860 --> 01:43:56.304
With everyone inside,

01:43:56.304 --> 01:43:57.585
[makes explosion noises]

01:43:57.585 --> 01:43:59.675
in the rubble of their tomb,

01:43:59.803 --> 01:44:02.713
we'll plant this note explaining why they died!

01:44:03.520 --> 01:44:06.910
All: "We, the students of Westerburg High, will die.

01:44:06.910 --> 01:44:10.357
Our burned bodies may finally get through to you.

01:44:10.357 --> 01:44:13.157
Your society turns out slaves and blanks.

01:44:13.686 --> 01:44:17.156
No thanks. Signed, the students of Westerburg High.

01:44:17.858 --> 01:44:18.918
GOODBYE."

01:44:19.274 --> 01:44:21.509
JD: We'll watch the smoke pour out the doors!

01:44:21.509 --> 01:44:23.759
Bring marshmallows, we'll make s'mores!

01:44:23.759 --> 01:44:29.339
We can smile and cuddle while the fire roars!

01:44:29.423 --> 01:44:33.423
I WAS MEANT TO BE YOURS!

01:44:33.572 --> 01:44:37.542
WE WERE MEANT TO BE ONE!

01:44:37.728 --> 01:44:41.608
I CAN'T MAKE IT ALONE,

01:44:41.693 --> 01:44:45.483
FINISH WHAT WE BEGUN.

01:44:45.591 --> 01:44:48.811
YOU WERE MEANT TO BE MINE!

01:44:49.056 --> 01:44:52.306
I AM ALL THAT YOU NEED!

01:44:52.519 --> 01:44:55.689
YOU CARVED OPEN MY HEART,

01:44:56.041 --> 01:44:58.911
CAN'T JUST LEAVE ME TO BLEED!

01:44:59.204 --> 01:45:00.165
V E R O N I C A!

01:45:00.165 --> 01:45:03.125
Open the.. open the door, please. Veronica, open the door!

01:45:03.441 --> 01:45:07.381
Veronica, can we not fight anymore please? Can we not fight anymore?

01:45:07.449 --> 01:45:09.751
Veronica, sure, you're scared, I've been there.

01:45:09.751 --> 01:45:11.441
I can set you free!

01:45:11.522 --> 01:45:13.733
Veronica, don't make me come in there.

01:45:13.733 --> 01:45:15.793
I'M GONNA COUNT TO THREE!

01:45:16.228 --> 01:45:16.918
One...

01:45:17.272 --> 01:45:17.843
Two...

01:45:17.843 --> 01:45:18.783
FUCK IT!

01:45:26.449 --> 01:45:27.329
No...

01:45:29.688 --> 01:45:30.908
Veronica...

01:45:32.217 --> 01:45:33.247
Oh God....

01:45:35.886 --> 01:45:36.726
Please..

01:45:36.989 --> 01:45:37.879
don't...

01:45:38.780 --> 01:45:40.760
leave me alone....

01:45:42.282 --> 01:45:43.092
You..

01:45:43.538 --> 01:45:44.338
were...

01:45:45.052 --> 01:45:47.082
all I could trust....

01:45:48.790 --> 01:45:49.410
I..

01:45:50.000 --> 01:45:50.810
can't...

01:45:51.386 --> 01:45:53.456
do this alone....

01:45:54.897 --> 01:45:55.727
STILL,

01:45:55.853 --> 01:45:57.179
I WILL

01:45:57.179 --> 01:46:00.889
IF I MUST!

01:46:01.519 --> 01:46:02.669
Mrs.S: Veronica?

01:46:03.000 --> 01:46:04.300
I made you a snack!

01:46:04.769 --> 01:46:05.759
...Veronica?

01:46:07.996 --> 01:46:09.419
[screams]

01:46:09.419 --> 01:46:11.359
V: OH, GOD! MOM!

01:46:11.529 --> 01:46:18.313
[screaming at each other]

01:46:18.313 --> 01:46:21.593
V: I'M SO SORRY, IT'S-IT'S A JOKE. I'M SO SORRY, I'M SO SORRY!

01:46:22.838 --> 01:46:24.398
Mrs.S: IT'S NOT FUNNY!

01:46:25.169 --> 01:46:26.997
V: You're right, you're right, I'm sorry-- Mr.S: What's going on up here?!

01:46:26.997 --> 01:46:28.987
V: Oh god, Mom, Dad, I'm so sorry.

01:46:29.081 --> 01:46:31.491
Mr.S: Sorry for what? V: For being a horrible person.

01:46:31.577 --> 01:46:32.197
Mrs.S: What?

01:46:32.532 --> 01:46:33.685
Mrs.S: Where are you going?! V: Out.

01:46:33.685 --> 01:46:35.115
Mr.S: When will you be back?

01:46:35.500 --> 01:46:36.890
V: ...That's a good question.

01:46:37.994 --> 01:46:41.144
I wanted someone strong who could protect me.

01:46:41.856 --> 01:46:44.776
I let his anger fester and infect me.

01:46:45.687 --> 01:46:47.617
His solution is a lie.

01:46:47.830 --> 01:46:49.630
No one here deserves to die.

01:46:49.830 --> 01:46:50.864
Except for me,

01:46:50.864 --> 01:46:54.014
and the monster I created.

01:46:54.075 --> 01:46:56.132
Yeah, YEAH!

01:46:56.132 --> 01:47:00.072
Heads up, JD. I'm a dead girl walkin'.

01:47:00.168 --> 01:47:04.238
Can't hide from me, I'm a dead girl walkin'.

01:47:04.779 --> 01:47:06.519
Now here's your final bell.

01:47:06.868 --> 01:47:09.298
It's one more dance, and then farewell.

01:47:09.346 --> 01:47:10.700
Cheek to cheek in hell

01:47:10.700 --> 01:47:13.691
with a dead girl

01:47:13.771 --> 01:47:15.771
walkin'.

01:47:15.771 --> 01:47:18.459
S: WO-O-O-O-OAH!

01:47:18.459 --> 01:47:20.204
H M.: Come on, Westerburg!

01:47:20.204 --> 01:47:22.694
S: WO-O-O-O-OAH!

01:47:23.223 --> 01:47:25.013
H M.: Here we go! Here we go, now!

01:47:25.468 --> 01:47:26.368
Ms.F: Veronica!

01:47:27.347 --> 01:47:29.917
Jason Dean told me you just committed suicide.

01:47:30.445 --> 01:47:32.765
V: Yeah, well.. he's wrong about a lot of things.

01:47:33.509 --> 01:47:35.393
Ms.F: I threw together a lovely tribute,

01:47:35.393 --> 01:47:37.313
especially considering the short notice.

01:47:38.133 --> 01:47:39.629
V: Ms. Fleming, what's under the gym?

01:47:39.629 --> 01:47:40.739
Ms.F: The boiler room.

01:47:40.881 --> 01:47:41.766
V: Oh... that's it.

01:47:41.766 --> 01:47:43.336
Ms.F: Veronica, what is going on?!

01:47:43.550 --> 01:47:48.050
V: Got no time to talk, I'm a dead girl walkin'!

01:47:49.549 --> 01:47:51.534
S: HEY-O, WESTERBURG!

01:47:51.534 --> 01:47:53.424
TELL ME, WHAT'S THAT SOUND?

01:47:53.755 --> 01:47:55.770
HERE COMES WESTERBURG,

01:47:55.770 --> 01:47:57.910
COMIN' TA PUT YOU IN THE GROUND.

01:47:57.910 --> 01:48:00.026
GO, GO WESTERBURG!

01:48:00.026 --> 01:48:01.877
GIVE A GREAT BIG YELL.

01:48:02.267 --> 01:48:04.054
WESTERBURG WILL KNOCK YOU OUT,

01:48:04.094 --> 01:48:06.224
AND SEND YOU STRAIGHT TO HELL!

01:48:13.068 --> 01:48:14.438
V: Step away from the bomb.

01:48:16.601 --> 01:48:20.181
JD: And here I thought you'd lost your taste in faking suicides.

01:48:21.033 --> 01:48:22.933
Oh-oh, and this little thing?

01:48:23.574 --> 01:48:25.424
I'd hardly call this a bomb.

01:48:26.184 --> 01:48:27.424
This is to trigger

01:48:27.514 --> 01:48:29.064
the packs of thermals

01:48:29.597 --> 01:48:30.967
upstairs in the gym.

01:48:31.555 --> 01:48:32.765
Now, those?...

01:48:33.755 --> 01:48:35.105
Those are bombs.

01:48:35.865 --> 01:48:37.751
People will see the ashes of Westerburg,

01:48:37.751 --> 01:48:39.279
and think to themselves,

01:48:39.279 --> 01:48:41.747
"Now there's a school that self destructed,

01:48:41.747 --> 01:48:44.277
not because society didn't care,

01:48:44.704 --> 01:48:45.844
BUT BECAUSE

01:48:46.439 --> 01:48:47.419
that school

01:48:48.096 --> 01:48:49.386
WAS society."

01:48:50.105 --> 01:48:53.055
You know, the only place that Heathers and Marthas can truly get along...?

01:48:55.127 --> 01:48:56.027
Heaven.

01:48:57.162 --> 01:49:00.332
V: I wish your mom had been a little stronger.

01:49:01.335 --> 01:49:05.095
I wish she'd stayed around a little longer.

01:49:05.492 --> 01:49:07.159
I wish your dad were good!

01:49:07.159 --> 01:49:09.439
I wish grownups understood!

01:49:09.792 --> 01:49:11.159
I wish we'd met before

01:49:11.159 --> 01:49:13.439
they convinced you life is war!

01:49:13.611 --> 01:49:14.936
I wish you'd come with me!

01:49:14.936 --> 01:49:17.026
JD: I WISH I HAD MORE TNT!

01:49:19.784 --> 01:49:21.594
S: HEY-O, WESTERBURG!

01:49:21.678 --> 01:49:23.538
TELL ME, WHAT'S THAT SOUND?

01:49:23.725 --> 01:49:25.715
HERE COMES WESTERBURG,

01:49:25.810 --> 01:49:27.907
COMIN' TA PUT YOU IN THE GROUND!

01:49:27.907 --> 01:49:29.677
GO, GO WESTERBURG!

01:49:29.865 --> 01:49:31.695
GIVE A GREAT BIG YELL.

01:49:31.912 --> 01:49:33.822
WESTERBURG WILL KNOCK YOU OUT,

01:49:33.822 --> 01:49:34.842
AND SEND YOU STRAIGHT TO--

01:49:34.842 --> 01:49:36.522
[gunshot] V: [screams]

01:49:47.576 --> 01:49:49.036
JD: Was that good for you?

01:49:49.701 --> 01:49:51.471
'Cause it kinda sucked for me.

01:49:51.609 --> 01:49:52.409
V: JD...?

01:49:53.000 --> 01:49:53.605
JD: [grunts]

01:49:53.605 --> 01:49:55.668
V: Just listen to me, just listen to me, ok?

01:49:55.668 --> 01:49:58.658
Just listen to me, it's over, okay? Which wire do I pull?

01:49:59.378 --> 01:50:01.048
JD, WHICH WIRE DO I PULL?!

01:50:02.236 --> 01:50:02.746
J- ....

01:50:33.376 --> 01:50:34.936
Dear diary, the irony of this is that

01:50:34.936 --> 01:50:37.506
I never got to write my own suicide note.

01:50:38.243 --> 01:50:39.233
JD: [grunts]

01:50:41.398 --> 01:50:42.518
Smart girl.

01:50:44.447 --> 01:50:45.872
Bring the trigger bomb

01:50:45.872 --> 01:50:48.222
out here to the football field, and nobody dies.

01:50:48.795 --> 01:50:49.785
'Cept you...

01:50:50.769 --> 01:50:51.919
...if you keep holding onto the thing-

01:50:51.919 --> 01:50:54.219
V: I don't deserve to live. JD: I respectfully...

01:50:55.027 --> 01:50:56.007
...disagree.

01:50:57.349 --> 01:50:59.369
JD: Give it to me. V: Just stay away from me.

01:51:00.910 --> 01:51:01.980
JD: Or what?

01:51:03.829 --> 01:51:05.199
I am damaged.

01:51:06.506 --> 01:51:07.906
Far too damaged.

01:51:08.951 --> 01:51:11.201
But you're not beyond repair.

01:51:13.220 --> 01:51:14.720
Stick around here.

01:51:16.907 --> 01:51:18.317
Make things better.

01:51:19.321 --> 01:51:20.151
'Cause...

01:51:20.771 --> 01:51:21.921
you beat me...

01:51:22.221 --> 01:51:23.471
fair and square.

01:51:25.588 --> 01:51:27.438
Please stand back now.

01:51:32.009 --> 01:51:33.259
Little further.

01:51:35.775 --> 01:51:38.105
Don't know what this thing will do.

01:51:38.840 --> 01:51:40.440
Hope you miss me,

01:51:40.510 --> 01:51:41.925
wish you'd kiss me.

01:51:42.235 --> 01:51:45.525
Then you'd know I worship you.

01:51:46.436 --> 01:51:49.466
JD: I'll trade my life for yours. V: Oh my god!

01:51:49.466 --> 01:51:52.364
JD: And once I disappear... V: Wait, HOLD ON.

01:51:52.364 --> 01:51:57.864
JD: Clean up the mess down here! V: NOT THIS WAY!

01:51:58.172 --> 01:51:59.852
JD: Our love is God.

01:52:01.290 --> 01:52:02.920
Our love is God.

01:52:04.229 --> 01:52:05.839
Our love is God.

01:52:07.433 --> 01:52:13.383
Our love is God.

01:52:13.865 --> 01:52:15.215
V: Say hi to God.

01:52:15.215 --> 01:52:16.155
[EXPLODE]

01:52:35.686 --> 01:52:36.880
H M.: Where have you been?

01:52:36.940 --> 01:52:38.820
People were saying you killed yourself.

01:52:39.068 --> 01:52:40.708
H D.: You look like hell.

01:52:40.925 --> 01:52:41.943
V: I just got back.

01:52:41.943 --> 01:52:43.163
H D.: Hey, what are you doing?!

01:52:46.811 --> 01:52:49.290
V: Listen up, folks. War is over.

01:52:49.460 --> 01:52:51.840
Brand new sheriff's come to town.

01:52:52.358 --> 01:52:54.802
We are done with acting evil.

01:52:54.932 --> 01:52:57.252
We will lay our weapons down.

01:52:57.652 --> 01:53:00.241
We're all damaged, we're all frightened.

01:53:00.241 --> 01:53:02.591
We're all freaks, but that's alright.

01:53:02.926 --> 01:53:05.466
We'll endure it, we'll survive it.

01:53:05.797 --> 01:53:10.347
Martha, are you free tonight?

01:53:14.950 --> 01:53:15.770
Ah...

01:53:16.343 --> 01:53:19.133
My date for the pep rally kinda blew...

01:53:20.041 --> 01:53:21.831
me off, so...

01:53:23.071 --> 01:53:25.843
I was wondering, if you weren't doing anything tonight, maybe we could

01:53:25.843 --> 01:53:27.973
pop some Jiffy Pop and rent a video?

01:53:29.361 --> 01:53:31.331
Something with a happy ending.

01:53:31.747 --> 01:53:33.857
M: Are there any happy endings?

01:53:34.908 --> 01:53:37.748
V: I can't promise no more Heathers.

01:53:37.906 --> 01:53:40.246
High school may not ever end.

01:53:40.776 --> 01:53:43.676
Still, I miss you. I'd be honored,

01:53:43.993 --> 01:53:46.992
If you'd let me be your friend!

01:53:46.992 --> 01:53:48.832
M: My friend!

01:53:49.265 --> 01:53:54.275
Both: We can be seventeen!

01:53:55.000 --> 01:54:00.040
We can learn how to chill.

01:54:00.863 --> 01:54:03.953
If no one loves me now,

01:54:04.522 --> 01:54:09.692
someday somebody will.

01:54:10.131 --> 01:54:15.021
We can be seventeen.

01:54:15.420 --> 01:54:19.790
Still time to make things right.

01:54:20.314 --> 01:54:23.264
One day we'll change the world,

01:54:23.467 --> 01:54:27.787
but let's kick back tonight!

01:54:27.895 --> 01:54:31.735
All: Let's go be seventeen!

01:54:31.901 --> 01:54:35.301
Take off our clothes and dance!

01:54:35.432 --> 01:54:37.832
Act like we're all still kids,

01:54:37.999 --> 01:54:42.039
'cause this could be our final chance!

01:54:42.216 --> 01:54:45.386
Always be seventeen.

01:54:45.494 --> 01:54:48.574
Celebrate you and I.

01:54:48.755 --> 01:54:50.675
Maybe we won't grow old,

01:54:50.852 --> 01:54:55.732
and maybe then we'll never ever die!

01:54:56.184 --> 01:55:00.154
We'll make it beautiful!

01:55:00.670 --> 01:55:04.450
We'll make it beautiful!

01:55:04.674 --> 01:55:10.024
Beautiful! Beautiful! Beautiful!

01:55:10.361 --> 01:55:16.071
BEAUTIFUL!

01:55:10.361 --> 01:55:16.071
BEAUTIFUL!