WEBVTT

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This episode of

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It's the End of the World as We Know it

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and I Feel Fine

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was made possible by contributions

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from slaves like you.

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Spank you very much.

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"Which brings us once again

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to the urgent realization

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of just how much there is

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still left to own.

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Item 6 on the agenda:

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The meaning of life."

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Gooooooooood morning slaves

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and welcome to another sedition of

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It's the End of the World as we Know it

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and I Feel Fine, where the long journey

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to a brighter tomorrow

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begins with a single step.

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"In the past few weeks, uh...

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five high profile bankers have died

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all from apparent suicides."

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"Another one!"

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"Hmm?"

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"Another one just went past. Downwards."

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"Must be a board meeting."

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I am your host, the Stimulator

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and it seems like just about

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every other week I get a message

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that goes something like this:

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"Yo Stim!

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Big fan of the show.

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I just have one question...

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when are you going to do a sedition

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on anarcho-capitalism?

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Have you ever read Murray Rothbard?

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True anarchy is synonymous


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with free markets."

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For the most part, I don't

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respond to these types of questions.

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So... for all those of you

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who have asked me over the years,

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the answer is

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Ahem:

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Fuck anarcho-capitalism!

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Seriously… at best, the attempt to

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marry anarchism and capitalism

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is a nonsensical contradiction.

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And at worst, 


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it's the political equivalent of

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what would happen if

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Ayn Rand and Mussolini

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spawned a fedora-toting,

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Austrian love-child,

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who happened to be born with a disease

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that meant it couldn't go outside

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and so was forced to live its entire life

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confined to the bowels of

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online Reddit forums.

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Now… to be clear,

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as an anarchist

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I'm all for smashing the state.

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but there's nothing particularly

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revolutionary or liberatory

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about smashing the state

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if it just means handing more power

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over to corporations.

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If anything,

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it only makes shit way fucking worse.

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And if you don't believe me…

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just ask the people of Flint, Michigan.


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"We started to lose our hair,

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all five of us.

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And we started developing rashes

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on our arms and our face."

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Back in March of 2011,

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Michigan's an-cap Governor, Rick Snyder

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"I'm an accountant."

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signed a bill which allowed for

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the special appointment of so-called

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“emergency financial managers”

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which are essentially just a cabal

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of corporate technocrats

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who are granted the supreme authority

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to override decisions

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made by local governments,

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all in the name of market efficiency.


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"Get in there. Get the job done.

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Get out."

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In 2014,

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in an effort to pinch some pennies,

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Flint's Emergency Manager

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Darnell Earley,

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switched the source

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of the city's drinking water

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to the heavily polluted Flint River,

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which is chock full of a delicious,

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thirst-quenching,

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industrial chemical solvent,

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called trihalomethane.

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This toxic fucking slurry immediately

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began corroding the city's pipes,

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causing a "trickle-down" effect of sorts

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- with shit tons of lead

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leaching into the water supply

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and ultimately exposing the city's

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100,000 residents

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to severe fucking lead poisoning.

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"I think in retrospect... uhh

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if we all had, uhh, you know,

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20/20 hindsight,

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we'd do a lot of things different."

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"I'm an accountant."

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"I love you cuz you kill people."

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And now, impoverished Flint residents

00:03:30.345 --> 00:03:31.713
who can’t afford to pay

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for their poison fucking water

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are getting their pipes shutoff altogether

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"Stop the water shutoff!

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Water is a human right!"

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just like their neighbours

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in the cash-strapped city of Detroit

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where thousands of peeps

00:03:43.090 --> 00:03:44.859
have had their drinking water cut off

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in strict accordance with

00:03:46.328 --> 00:03:47.629
the libertarian logic

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of the free fucking market.


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Or maybe you can ask


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peeps living in California's

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San Fernando Valley,

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who for months now

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have been dealing with

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a giant fucking natural gas leak...

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"Hey Stim!

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I've got a natural gas leak for ya!

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Jesus Fucking Christ, that's rank.

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You're a sick fuck Agitator.


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Anyway, as I was saying…

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residents of the Porter Ranch community

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north of Los Angeles,

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are currently facing the United Snakes'

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biggest environmental disaster since 2010,

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when the BP's Deepwater Horizon oil rig

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blew the fuck up in the Gulf of Mexico.


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For months now,

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a steady stream of methane

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has been spewing out the Aliso Canyon

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underground natural gas storage facility,

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causing a slew of health problems

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for local residents.

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"And I have terrible headaches,


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my daughter experiences stomach pain,

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my son's got nosebleeds.

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It's just really bad."

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forcing the evacuation of thousands

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of peeps from the surrounding community,

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and leading the state governor to declare

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a motherfuckin state of emergency.

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To make matters even worse...

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methane is about 86 times more powerful

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than C02, in terms of its

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greenhouse gas effect,

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meaning that this fuck-up is making

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a gigantic contribution to the

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runaway climate change already

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fueling a historically unprecedented

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regional drought.

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At its highest level,

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this leak accounts for a whopping 25%

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of California’s total emissions

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– roughly equivalent to the effects of

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driving 4.5 million fucking cars,

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every single motherfuckin day.

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This epic clusterfuck

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has been compounded by the fact that

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Southern California Gas,

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the company which owns the site,

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inexplicably removed the facility's

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emergency shut-off valve

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and never replaced it.

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No doubt because doing so

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would have cost them money

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that they didn't want to spend.

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And since the leak is 8,000 feet

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underground, and extremely hard to get,

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its expected to take several months to fix

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meaning that there's nothing that peeps

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can do but wait for the free market

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to do its magic.


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Fuck anarcho-capitalism.

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So yeah....

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I hope that answers your question.

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Now stop bugging me about it.



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♫♫ "These them droppers

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who don't hold heat.

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Gangstas who don't stroll streets.

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Next level criminality

00:06:02.230 --> 00:06:03.964
keeping shit low key.

00:06:03.964 --> 00:06:05.632
Not like Bobby Shmurda's dumb ass

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but they do the Shmony tho.

00:06:07.235 --> 00:06:08.202
I mean they show money

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then the police dance on our bones.

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It's time to overthrow

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cuz these banksters don't play

00:06:13.411 --> 00:06:15.909
plus made the rules up in this shady game.

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Gangbanging for major pay

00:06:17.379 --> 00:06:20.430
they pushin their laws like narcotics.

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Brown and Black males in them prisons

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box up they products

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while how Nike be bankin

00:06:25.165 --> 00:06:27.086
of the prison complex.

00:06:27.086 --> 00:06:28.851
Even Michael Jordan a gangsta

00:06:28.851 --> 00:06:30.782
- he also bank off the process.

00:06:30.782 --> 00:06:32.370
Ooo... so fuck your idol.

00:06:32.370 --> 00:06:33.629
Your idol about that greed...

00:06:33.629 --> 00:06:34.729
plus them Nikes don't fit

00:06:34.729 --> 00:06:35.597
my place, so dues

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That's why I sold my freeze.

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What about our babies?

00:06:38.533 --> 00:06:40.034
They get employed overseas.

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And our women?

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Y'all know what happens

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to our women overseas.

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Prostitution rings,

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cuz poverty's to blame.

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Exploitation at its highest

00:06:48.175 --> 00:06:49.711
always made in the USA

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by these gangstas

00:06:51.145 --> 00:06:52.813
and these pimps

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The trill us to trap us

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y'all know what is is." ♫♫

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For weeks now,

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high-priced financial analysts,

00:07:00.554 --> 00:07:03.390
hedge fund managers, and wall street execs

00:07:03.390 --> 00:07:04.159
have been shitting their

00:07:04.159 --> 00:07:06.260
ten thousand dollar designer suits

00:07:06.260 --> 00:07:08.496
as a convergence of warning signs

00:07:08.496 --> 00:07:10.330
indicate that a clusterfuck

00:07:10.330 --> 00:07:12.935
of epic proportions is about to hit the

00:07:12.935 --> 00:07:14.601
global motherfuckin economy.


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"Mr Plouffe, have you seen the latest

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stock price?

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It's hitting an all-time low of $18,

00:07:20.174 --> 00:07:21.442
and it's still dropping.

00:07:21.442 --> 00:07:23.744
Almost 400 billion dollars of wealth

00:07:23.744 --> 00:07:26.047
was lost today."

00:07:26.467 --> 00:07:28.248
Unlike the great financial shit storm

00:07:28.248 --> 00:07:30.884
of 2007 and 2008,

00:07:30.884 --> 00:07:33.153
when bankers and coked-out stock brokers

00:07:33.153 --> 00:07:34.823
were too busy groping around

00:07:34.823 --> 00:07:37.805
in a greasy fucking orgy of CDO

00:07:37.805 --> 00:07:39.727
and mortgage-backed derivatives trading

00:07:39.727 --> 00:07:42.029
to see the writing on the fucking wall...

00:07:42.029 --> 00:07:43.097
"And then that happens."

00:07:43.097 --> 00:07:44.231
this time around,

00:07:44.231 --> 00:07:46.667
this same assortment of capitalist scum

00:07:46.667 --> 00:07:48.636
are completely fucking aware of

00:07:48.636 --> 00:07:50.037
the ten story shit-nami

00:07:50.037 --> 00:07:52.039
looming on the not-so-distant horizon

00:07:52.039 --> 00:07:53.541
but have no fucking way to stop it.


00:07:53.541 --> 00:07:55.109
While millions of peeps were

00:07:55.109 --> 00:07:56.610
glued to their screens this month

00:07:56.610 --> 00:07:58.679
cycling through photos of J-Beebs'

00:07:58.679 --> 00:07:59.813
fucked up new hairdo

00:08:01.014 --> 00:08:03.084
and reading an endless supply of clickbait

00:08:03.084 --> 00:08:05.252
articles about the new Star Wars flick,

00:08:05.252 --> 00:08:07.821
several top bankers were sounding the horn

00:08:07.821 --> 00:08:09.323
alerting their fellow rats

00:08:09.323 --> 00:08:12.058
that the time has come to abandon ship.


00:08:12.058 --> 00:08:13.994
"Shit!"

00:08:17.024 --> 00:08:19.266
<i>Cheering</i>

00:08:21.924 --> 00:08:24.604
"Hey that was Wilkens of finance."

00:08:24.604 --> 00:08:25.600
"No that was Robertson."

00:08:25.600 --> 00:08:27.975
On January 8th a leading economist

00:08:27.975 --> 00:08:29.842
from the Royal Bank of Scotland 


00:08:29.842 --> 00:08:31.946
published a memo, urging investors

00:08:31.946 --> 00:08:33.914
to, quote, “Sell everything!”

00:08:33.914 --> 00:08:35.516
"How can the price be going down?!"

00:08:35.516 --> 00:08:37.151
"Something's wrong!"

00:08:37.151 --> 00:08:39.820
and warning that 2016 is going to be a

00:08:39.820 --> 00:08:42.322
quote, “cataclysmic year” that could see

00:08:42.322 --> 00:08:43.858
up to one fifth of the total

00:08:43.858 --> 00:08:45.994
global stock market wiped the fuck out.

00:08:46.214 --> 00:08:48.361
"What you're telling me is that

00:08:48.361 --> 00:08:50.368
the music is about to stop,

00:08:50.968 --> 00:08:52.700
and we're going to be left holding

00:08:52.700 --> 00:08:55.970
the biggest bag of odorous excrement

00:08:55.970 --> 00:08:59.717
ever assembled in the history of....

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capitalism?"

00:09:01.769 --> 00:09:03.277
This gloomy prediction has been

00:09:03.277 --> 00:09:04.978
more or less echoed by economists

00:09:04.978 --> 00:09:07.044
at several behemoth fucking banks,

00:09:07.044 --> 00:09:09.450
including Morgan Stanley, Barclays,

00:09:09.450 --> 00:09:12.252
Bank of America Merrill fucking Lynch,

00:09:12.252 --> 00:09:14.454
Deutsche Bank, and JP Morgan.


00:09:14.454 --> 00:09:15.356
This time around

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the epicenter of the crisis is China,

00:09:18.130 --> 00:09:21.062
the very engine of global economic growth

00:09:21.062 --> 00:09:22.062
that has been propping up

00:09:22.062 --> 00:09:23.797
the entire international economy

00:09:23.797 --> 00:09:25.432
since the 2008 meltdown.

00:09:25.432 --> 00:09:26.632
For years now,

00:09:26.632 --> 00:09:27.968
gangsta capitalists have been pouring

00:09:27.968 --> 00:09:29.803
billions of dollars into

00:09:29.803 --> 00:09:32.373
a giant fucking construction boom in China

00:09:32.373 --> 00:09:34.110
building sprawling ghost towns

00:09:34.110 --> 00:09:35.710
that nobody fucking lives in.


00:09:35.710 --> 00:09:36.810
Agitator: "Except for maybe...

00:09:36.810 --> 00:09:37.780
these chickens."

00:09:37.780 --> 00:09:39.447
This insane fucking building bonanza

00:09:39.447 --> 00:09:40.916
has used up a huge percentage

00:09:40.916 --> 00:09:42.783
of the world's total output of oil,

00:09:42.783 --> 00:09:45.419
concrete, coal, steel and other metals….

00:09:45.419 --> 00:09:47.522
and now that the party's wrapping up,

00:09:47.522 --> 00:09:49.190
the prices of these commodities are

00:09:49.190 --> 00:09:51.139
in total fucking free-fall,

00:09:51.139 --> 00:09:52.553
with some analysts predicting

00:09:52.553 --> 00:09:54.794
that the price of oil could drop down to

00:09:54.794 --> 00:09:57.132
as low as $10 a motherfuckin barrel.


00:09:57.298 --> 00:09:59.300
"Bring it down more, fuck!"

00:09:59.300 --> 00:10:01.101
This is yet more good news for

00:10:01.101 --> 00:10:02.803
opponents of the Motherfuckin' Tar Sands,

00:10:02.803 --> 00:10:04.602
since the energy and extractive

00:10:04.602 --> 00:10:06.240
corporations most heavily invested

00:10:06.240 --> 00:10:08.742
in mining and refining this toxic sludge

00:10:08.742 --> 00:10:10.712
are going to take a serious fucking hit.

00:10:11.192 --> 00:10:13.114
Who knows… some of them might go bankrupt

00:10:13.114 --> 00:10:14.564
and have to shut down!


00:10:14.564 --> 00:10:16.484
"What do you mean you fuckin got laid off?

00:10:16.484 --> 00:10:18.852
"The fuckin price of oil... or some shit."

00:10:18.852 --> 00:10:20.985
But while this looming economic collapse

00:10:20.985 --> 00:10:22.339
may seem like great news

00:10:22.339 --> 00:10:23.657
to peeps eagerly awaiting

00:10:23.657 --> 00:10:26.026
the violent death of capitalism, and

00:10:26.026 --> 00:10:27.961
the chance to piss on its fucking grave,

00:10:27.961 --> 00:10:30.066
the unfortunate reality is that


00:10:30.066 --> 00:10:31.468
it will be mostly poor peeps

00:10:31.468 --> 00:10:33.073
who get fucked in the end.

00:10:33.073 --> 00:10:34.739
Further economic turmoil risks

00:10:34.739 --> 00:10:36.537
increasing the nationalist backlash

00:10:36.537 --> 00:10:38.873
that is already reaching a fever pitch

00:10:38.873 --> 00:10:40.209
in the West

00:10:40.209 --> 00:10:41.403
and will no doubt make life

00:10:41.403 --> 00:10:42.215
even more desperate

00:10:42.215 --> 00:10:44.005
for peeps in the Global South,

00:10:44.005 --> 00:10:45.545
who are already suffering the brunt

00:10:45.545 --> 00:10:47.278
of global inequality and

00:10:47.278 --> 00:10:48.352
runaway climate change.


00:10:48.622 --> 00:10:50.418
After the 2008 crisis,


00:10:50.418 --> 00:10:52.653
rich fucking bankers got bailed out

00:10:52.653 --> 00:10:53.920
on the public dime

00:10:53.920 --> 00:10:55.464
while millions of poor peeps

00:10:55.464 --> 00:10:56.726
found themselves homeless,

00:10:56.726 --> 00:10:58.459
and millions more lost their jobs.

00:10:59.239 --> 00:11:00.628
Politicians around the world

00:11:00.628 --> 00:11:02.662
followed up this economic shock therapy

00:11:02.662 --> 00:11:04.228
by gutting pensions,

00:11:04.228 --> 00:11:07.235
privatizing public services and industries

00:11:07.235 --> 00:11:08.735
and pushing through painful cuts

00:11:08.735 --> 00:11:09.953
to public spending.

00:11:09.953 --> 00:11:11.071
If we want to avoid having

00:11:11.071 --> 00:11:12.072
the same thing happen

00:11:12.072 --> 00:11:13.340
next time around, peeps will

00:11:13.340 --> 00:11:15.575
have to be ready to seriously throw down.

00:11:15.575 --> 00:11:17.223
Voting for Bernie's just not gonna cut it.

00:11:17.223 --> 00:11:18.746
"Raaar!" "Oh.... jesus!"

00:11:18.746 --> 00:11:20.547
A recent report published by Oxfam

00:11:20.547 --> 00:11:21.548
pointed out that

00:11:21.548 --> 00:11:23.283
the 62 richest motherfuckers on earth

00:11:23.283 --> 00:11:26.153
now possess the same amount of wealth

00:11:26.153 --> 00:11:27.554
as the bottom 50 percent

00:11:27.554 --> 00:11:29.064
of the world's population.

00:11:29.064 --> 00:11:30.912
Now I'm no economist…

00:11:30.912 --> 00:11:32.426
"Just tell me the truth!"

00:11:32.693 --> 00:11:34.446
but it seems like the most sensible

00:11:34.446 --> 00:11:36.827
and financially prudent thing to do

00:11:36.827 --> 00:11:38.827
would be to round up these 62 posh,

00:11:38.827 --> 00:11:41.198
caviar-sucking parasites,

00:11:41.198 --> 00:11:43.058
put them all onto a cruise ship,

00:11:43.058 --> 00:11:45.472
tell them they’re going to a luxury resort

00:11:45.472 --> 00:11:46.652
in the Maldives,

00:11:46.652 --> 00:11:47.975
steer that cruise ship into

00:11:47.975 --> 00:11:49.810
the middle of the Arctic fucking ocean,

00:11:49.810 --> 00:11:50.778
sink it,

00:11:50.778 --> 00:11:52.679
and start divvying up their shit.

00:11:52.679 --> 00:11:54.455
This might not fix everything…

00:11:54.455 --> 00:11:55.949
but it’d be a good start.

00:11:58.979 --> 00:12:00.788
And that about does it for this sedition

00:12:00.788 --> 00:12:02.623
of It’s the End of the World as we Know it


00:12:02.623 --> 00:12:03.825
and I Feel Fine.

00:12:03.825 --> 00:12:05.426
Many of you found this fuckin show

00:12:05.426 --> 00:12:06.827
through the corporate spy website

00:12:06.827 --> 00:12:08.429
known as FedBook.

00:12:08.429 --> 00:12:10.330
Since we don’t own this infrastructure,

00:12:10.330 --> 00:12:12.700
we’re quite sure that at any moment

00:12:12.700 --> 00:12:14.273
they could yank our pages

00:12:14.273 --> 00:12:15.926
and you muthafuckas wouldn’t know

00:12:15.926 --> 00:12:17.932
when we put out a new sedition.


00:12:17.932 --> 00:12:19.124
One way to get this

00:12:19.124 --> 00:12:20.236
filthy fuckin show

00:12:20.236 --> 00:12:21.880
without Zuckerberg’s interference

00:12:21.880 --> 00:12:23.754
is to subscribe to our podcast.

00:12:23.754 --> 00:12:25.504
But if that’s not your thing,

00:12:25.504 --> 00:12:26.680
you can always sign up

00:12:26.680 --> 00:12:29.417
to our twice-a-month guacomail newsletter.

00:12:29.417 --> 00:12:31.519
This month we will raffle one of

00:12:31.519 --> 00:12:33.690
our bad ass subMedia t-shirts to a lucky

NOTE Paragraph

00:12:33.690 --> 00:12:35.488
person who subscribes to guacomail.

00:12:35.488 --> 00:12:37.792
To do so, just visit my fuckin website:

00:12:40.004 --> 00:12:40.934
With that said,

00:12:40.934 --> 00:12:42.564
I want to thank the peeps who donated

00:12:42.564 --> 00:12:43.564
despite living


00:12:43.564 --> 00:12:45.132
in these shitty economic times.

00:12:45.132 --> 00:12:47.592
So... much gratitude to Jonathan, Kyle,

00:12:47.592 --> 00:12:50.637
Cristian, Bruno, Steven, Miguel, Shannon,

00:12:50.637 --> 00:12:52.308
Francois, John, Benjamin, Jennifer,

00:12:52.308 --> 00:12:55.142
Yania, Claire, Samuel, Veronica,

00:12:55.142 --> 00:12:57.711
Darren, Justin, Guillaume, Robin, Ranko,

00:12:57.711 --> 00:13:00.881
Hassan, Hansen, Deda, Raul, Max, Baraton,

00:13:00.881 --> 00:13:02.683
Karlis and Blade.


00:13:03.023 --> 00:13:04.367
Tostilocos!

00:13:04.367 --> 00:13:05.777
I also would like to welcome

00:13:05.777 --> 00:13:08.321
the newest member of the taconspiracy -


00:13:08.321 --> 00:13:09.223
Nada.

00:13:09.223 --> 00:13:10.990
Stay tuned next time for another

00:13:10.990 --> 00:13:13.237
riotus roundup of the news

00:13:13.237 --> 00:13:15.309
from the global muthafuckin resistance.

00:13:15.599 --> 00:13:17.164
Hasta la pasta compañeros!


00:13:17.164 --> 00:13:19.099
♫♫ "Tryin to kill us and trap us,

00:13:19.099 --> 00:13:20.800
they handlin they biz.

00:13:20.800 --> 00:13:22.636
They the real gangstas,

00:13:22.636 --> 00:13:24.104
they the real pimps,

00:13:24.104 --> 00:13:25.639
they trill us to trap us,

00:13:25.639 --> 00:13:27.408
y'all know what it is.

00:13:30.268 --> 00:13:32.279
Tryin to kill us and trap us,

00:13:32.279 --> 00:13:34.489
they handling they biz." ♫♫