1
00:00:13,485 --> 00:00:14,600
nice hat

2
00:00:14,600 --> 00:00:15,610
dork

3
00:00:15,610 --> 00:00:16,983
you look like a duck

4
00:00:16,983 --> 00:00:18,938
I had Alfred read your books

5
00:00:18,938 --> 00:00:20,301
he told me they suck

6
00:00:20,301 --> 00:00:21,751
I'll crush your British nuts until

7
00:00:21,751 --> 00:00:23,505
they're bangers and mash

8
00:00:23,505 --> 00:00:25,360
I've seen better detective work

9
00:00:25,360 --> 00:00:27,186
in Tango and Cash

10
00:00:27,186 --> 00:00:28,100
you chump

11
00:00:28,100 --> 00:00:30,412
I kick punks like you off the streets

12
00:00:30,412 --> 00:00:31,812
while you and Velma here

13
00:00:31,812 --> 00:00:34,083
are solving Scooby-Doo mysteries

14
00:00:34,083 --> 00:00:35,713
nothing makes me laugh

15
00:00:35,713 --> 00:00:37,325
but I bet your raps can

16
00:00:37,325 --> 00:00:38,328
so bring it on

17
00:00:38,328 --> 00:00:39,844
bitch

18
00:00:39,844 --> 00:00:40,885
I'm Batman

19
00:00:40,885 --> 00:00:42,403
I once met a rich fellow

20
00:00:42,403 --> 00:00:44,001
who smelled of guano and pain

21
00:00:44,001 --> 00:00:45,074
Holmes explain

22
00:00:45,074 --> 00:00:46,583
I deduce this deuce stain

23
00:00:46,583 --> 00:00:47,324
is Bruce Wayne

24
00:00:47,324 --> 00:00:48,231
the billionaire?

25
00:00:48,234 --> 00:00:49,709
yes, his wealth would allow

26
00:00:49,709 --> 00:00:51,108
this adversary of ours

27
00:00:51,108 --> 00:00:52,675
to afford the toys he needs

28
00:00:52,675 --> 00:00:54,511
since he has no superpowers

29
00:00:54,511 --> 00:00:56,182
you want a battle bat?

30
00:00:56,182 --> 00:00:56,716
bring it then

31
00:00:56,716 --> 00:00:58,222
I heard he has a British butler

32
00:00:58,222 --> 00:00:59,566
good, then he'll be used

33
00:00:59,566 --> 00:01:01,434
to getting served by Englishmen

34
00:01:01,434 --> 00:01:03,523
you're a wack vigilante black pantied

35
00:01:03,523 --> 00:01:04,870
spud with no skill

36
00:01:04,870 --> 00:01:06,440
my sidekick's a doctor

37
00:01:06,440 --> 00:01:08,559
because his flows are so ill

38
00:01:08,559 --> 00:01:09,886
shut up nerds

39
00:01:09,886 --> 00:01:11,793
I serve justice so eat it

40
00:01:11,793 --> 00:01:13,649
my sidekick only comes around

41
00:01:13,649 --> 00:01:14,901
when he's needed!

42
00:01:14,901 --> 00:01:15,347
Boy

43
00:01:15,347 --> 00:01:15,992
Wonder make you wonder

44
00:01:15,992 --> 00:01:16,855
how your ass got killed

45
00:01:16,855 --> 00:01:17,864
bite harder than those hounds

46
00:01:17,864 --> 00:01:18,511
down in Baskerville

47
00:01:18,511 --> 00:01:19,223
I'll blast you with that

48
00:01:19,223 --> 00:01:20,159
Bat-wack-rap repellent

49
00:01:20,159 --> 00:01:21,202
rappel a building, snatch a villain

50
00:01:21,202 --> 00:01:22,141
then by dinner be chillin'

51
00:01:22,141 --> 00:01:23,143
gotta secret 'bout your homegirl

52
00:01:23,143 --> 00:01:23,734
Irene Adler

53
00:01:23,734 --> 00:01:24,454
took her back to my nest

54
00:01:24,454 --> 00:01:25,599
to bam pow kersplat her

55
00:01:25,599 --> 00:01:26,249
I'll shatter that fiddle

56
00:01:26,249 --> 00:01:27,047
with a chop of the hand

57
00:01:27,047 --> 00:01:28,404
holy Conan Doyle let's get 'em

58
00:01:28,404 --> 00:01:29,359
oh god damn

59
00:01:29,359 --> 00:01:30,267
you're not smart

60
00:01:30,267 --> 00:01:31,153
you're selfish

61
00:01:31,153 --> 00:01:32,582
you endanger everyone's life

62
00:01:32,582 --> 00:01:34,201
why don't you let your boyfriend here

63
00:01:34,201 --> 00:01:35,403
go home to his wife?

64
00:01:35,403 --> 00:01:36,448
nobody likes you

65
00:01:36,448 --> 00:01:38,076
not your brother, not your partner

66
00:01:38,076 --> 00:01:39,061
not Scotland Yard

67
00:01:39,061 --> 00:01:40,658
you'll die alone with no friends

68
00:01:40,658 --> 00:01:42,222
except that needle in your arm

69
00:01:43,251 --> 00:01:45,813
this mustn't register on an emotional level

70
00:01:45,813 --> 00:01:47,906
first, exploit childhood tragedy

71
00:01:49,399 --> 00:01:50,687
then gesture with pipe

72
00:01:50,687 --> 00:01:52,505
Watson finishes punchline

73
00:01:52,505 --> 00:01:54,711
next, acknowledge compliment

74
00:01:54,711 --> 00:01:56,307
conclude with killer catch phrase

75
00:01:56,307 --> 00:01:58,075
I believe your parents' homicide

76
00:01:58,075 --> 00:01:59,555
is why you mask your face

77
00:01:59,555 --> 00:02:00,795
you're shamed and traumatized

78
00:02:00,795 --> 00:02:02,386
and haunted by the vast disgrace

79
00:02:02,386 --> 00:02:03,984
of watching like a passive waste

80
00:02:03,984 --> 00:02:04,976
as momma died

81
00:02:04,976 --> 00:02:06,663
and daddy was dispatched with haste

82
00:02:06,663 --> 00:02:08,169
Holmes you've cracked the case

83
00:02:08,169 --> 00:02:10,270
you're a batshit crazy basket case

84
00:02:10,270 --> 00:02:11,332
bloody good rhymes

85
00:02:11,332 --> 00:02:12,699
I've got tonnes

86
00:02:12,699 --> 00:02:14,674
dissing these dynamic douchebags was

87
00:02:14,674 --> 00:02:16,861
elementary my dear Watson

88
00:02:16,861 --> 00:02:17,364
ohhhhh!

89
00:02:17,364 --> 00:02:18,942
who won?

90
00:02:18,942 --> 00:02:20,712
who's next?

91
00:02:20,712 --> 00:02:22,620
you decide