WEBVTT

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nice hat

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dork

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you look like a duck

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I had Alfred read your books

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he told me they suck

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I'll crush your British nuts

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until they're bangers and mash

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I've seen better detective work

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in Tango and Cash

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you chump

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I kick punks like you off the streets

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while you and Velma here

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are solving Scooby-Doo mysteries

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nothing makes me laugh

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but I bet your raps can

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so bring it on

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bitch

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I'm Batman

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I once met a rich fellow

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who smelled of guano and pain

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Holmes explain

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I deduce this deuce stain

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is Bruce Wayne

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the billionaire?

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yes, his wealth would allow this

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adversary of ours

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to afford the toys he needs

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since he has no superpowers

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you want a battle bat?

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bring it then

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I heard he has a British butler

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good, then he'll be used

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to getting served by Englishmen

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you're a wack vigilante black pantied

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spud with no skill

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my sidekick's a doctor

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because his flows are so ill

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shut up nerds

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I serve justice so eat it

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my sidekick only comes around

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when he's needed!

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Boy

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Wonder make you wonder

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how your ass got killed

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bite harder than those hounds

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down in Baskerville

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I'll blast you with that

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Bat-wack-rap repellent

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rappel a building, snatch a villain

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then by dinner be chillin'

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gotta secret 'bout your homegirl

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Irene Adler

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took her back to my nest

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to bam pow kersplat her

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I'll shatter that fiddle

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with a chop of the hand

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holy Conan Doyle let's get 'em

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oh god damn

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you're not smart

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you're selfish

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you endanger everyone's life

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why don't you let your boyfriend here

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go home to his wife?

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nobody likes you

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not your brother, not your partner

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not Scotland Yard

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you'll die alone with no friends

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except that needle in your arm

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this mustn't register on an emotional level

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first, exploit childhood tragedy

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then gesture with pipe

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Watson finishes punchline

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next, acknowledge compliment

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conclude with killer catch phrase

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I believe your parents' homicide

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is why you mask your face

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you're shamed and traumatized

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and haunted by the vast disgrace

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of watching like a passive waste

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as momma died

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and daddy was dispatched with haste

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Holmes you've cracked the case

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you're a batshit crazy basket case

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bloody good rhymes

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I've got tonnes

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dissing these dynamic douchebags was

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elementary my dear Watson

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ohhhhh!

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who won?

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who's next?

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you decide