1
00:00:13,000 --> 00:00:14,000
nice hat

2
00:00:14,000 --> 00:00:15,000
dork

3
00:00:15,000 --> 00:00:16,000
you look like a duck

4
00:00:16,000 --> 00:00:18,000
I had Alfred read your books

5
00:00:18,000 --> 00:00:20,000
he told me they suck

6
00:00:20,000 --> 00:00:21,000
I'll crush your British nuts

7
00:00:21,000 --> 00:00:23,000
until they're bangers and mash

8
00:00:23,000 --> 00:00:25,000
I've seen better detective work

9
00:00:25,000 --> 00:00:27,000
in Tango and Cash

10
00:00:27,000 --> 00:00:28,000
you chump

11
00:00:28,000 --> 00:00:30,000
I kick punks like you off the streets

12
00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:31,000
while you and Velma here

13
00:00:31,000 --> 00:00:34,000
are solving Scooby-Doo mysteries

14
00:00:34,000 --> 00:00:35,000
nothing makes me laugh

15
00:00:35,000 --> 00:00:37,000
but I bet your raps can

16
00:00:37,000 --> 00:00:38,000
so bring it on

17
00:00:38,000 --> 00:00:39,000
bitch

18
00:00:39,000 --> 00:00:40,000
I'm Batman

19
00:00:40,000 --> 00:00:42,000
I once met a rich fellow

20
00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:44,000
who smelled of guano and pain

21
00:00:44,000 --> 00:00:45,000
Holmes explain

22
00:00:45,000 --> 00:00:46,000
I deduce this deuce stain

23
00:00:46,000 --> 00:00:47,000
is Bruce Wayne

24
00:00:47,000 --> 00:00:48,000
the billionaire?

25
00:00:48,000 --> 00:00:49,000
yes, his wealth would allow this

26
00:00:49,000 --> 00:00:51,000
adversary of ours

27
00:00:51,000 --> 00:00:52,000
to afford the toys he needs

28
00:00:52,000 --> 00:00:54,000
since he has no superpowers

29
00:00:54,000 --> 00:00:56,000
you want a battle bat?

30
00:00:56,000 --> 00:00:56,000
bring it then

31
00:00:56,000 --> 00:00:58,000
I heard he has a British butler

32
00:00:58,000 --> 00:00:59,000
good, then he'll be used

33
00:00:59,000 --> 00:01:01,000
to getting served by Englishmen

34
00:01:01,000 --> 00:01:03,000
you're a wack vigilante black pantied

35
00:01:03,000 --> 00:01:04,000
spud with no skill

36
00:01:04,000 --> 00:01:06,000
my sidekick's a doctor

37
00:01:06,000 --> 00:01:08,000
because his flows are so ill

38
00:01:08,000 --> 00:01:09,000
shut up nerds

39
00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:11,000
I serve justice so eat it

40
00:01:11,000 --> 00:01:13,000
my sidekick only comes around

41
00:01:13,000 --> 00:01:14,000
when he's needed!

42
00:01:14,000 --> 00:01:15,000
Boy

43
00:01:15,000 --> 00:01:15,000
Wonder make you wonder

44
00:01:15,000 --> 00:01:16,000
how your ass got killed

45
00:01:16,000 --> 00:01:17,000
bite harder than those hounds

46
00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:18,000
down in Baskerville

47
00:01:18,000 --> 00:01:19,000
I'll blast you with that

48
00:01:19,000 --> 00:01:20,000
Bat-wack-rap repellent

49
00:01:20,000 --> 00:01:21,000
rappel a building, snatch a villain

50
00:01:21,000 --> 00:01:22,000
then by dinner be chillin'

51
00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:23,000
gotta secret 'bout your homegirl

52
00:01:23,000 --> 00:01:23,000
Irene Adler

53
00:01:23,000 --> 00:01:24,000
took her back to my nest

54
00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:25,000
to bam pow kersplat her

55
00:01:25,000 --> 00:01:26,000
I'll shatter that fiddle

56
00:01:26,000 --> 00:01:27,000
with a chop of the hand

57
00:01:27,000 --> 00:01:28,000
holy Conan Doyle let's get 'em

58
00:01:28,000 --> 00:01:29,000
oh god damn

59
00:01:29,000 --> 00:01:30,000
you're not smart

60
00:01:30,000 --> 00:01:31,000
you're selfish

61
00:01:31,000 --> 00:01:32,000
you endanger everyone's life

62
00:01:32,000 --> 00:01:34,000
why don't you let your boyfriend here

63
00:01:34,000 --> 00:01:35,000
go home to his wife?

64
00:01:35,000 --> 00:01:36,000
nobody likes you

65
00:01:36,000 --> 00:01:38,000
not your brother, not your partner

66
00:01:38,000 --> 00:01:39,000
not Scotland Yard

67
00:01:39,000 --> 00:01:40,000
you'll die alone with no friends

68
00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:42,000
except that needle in your arm

69
00:01:43,000 --> 00:01:45,000
this mustn't register on an emotional level

70
00:01:45,000 --> 00:01:48,000
first, exploit childhood tragedy

71
00:01:49,000 --> 00:01:50,000
then gesture with pipe

72
00:01:50,000 --> 00:01:52,000
Watson finishes punchline

73
00:01:52,000 --> 00:01:54,000
next, acknowledge compliment

74
00:01:54,000 --> 00:01:56,000
conclude with killer catch phrase

75
00:01:56,000 --> 00:01:58,000
I believe your parents' homicide

76
00:01:58,000 --> 00:01:59,000
is why you mask your face

77
00:01:59,000 --> 00:02:00,000
you're shamed and traumatized

78
00:02:00,000 --> 00:02:02,000
and haunted by the vast disgrace

79
00:02:02,000 --> 00:02:03,000
of watching like a passive waste

80
00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:04,000
as momma died

81
00:02:04,000 --> 00:02:06,000
and daddy was dispatched with haste

82
00:02:06,000 --> 00:02:08,000
Holmes you've cracked the case

83
00:02:08,000 --> 00:02:10,000
you're a batshit crazy basket case

84
00:02:10,000 --> 00:02:11,000
bloody good rhymes

85
00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:12,000
I've got tonnes

86
00:02:12,000 --> 00:02:14,000
dissing these dynamic douchebags was

87
00:02:14,000 --> 00:02:16,000
elementary my dear Watson

88
00:02:16,000 --> 00:02:17,000
ohhhhh!

89
00:02:17,000 --> 00:02:18,000
who won?

90
00:02:18,000 --> 00:02:20,000
who's next?

91
00:02:20,000 --> 00:02:22,000
you decide