0:00:14.702,0:00:15.702
Gifts.

0:00:16.376,0:00:17.910
What a wonderful thing.

0:00:18.210,0:00:20.277
Who can say "no"to them, right?

0:00:21.760,0:00:23.376
When I was six years old,

0:00:23.400,0:00:24.640
I received my gifts.

0:00:25.320,0:00:28.776
My first grade teacher[br]had this brilliant idea.

0:00:28.800,0:00:32.136
She wanted us to experience[br]receiving gifts

0:00:32.159,0:00:36.160
but also learning the virtue[br]of complimenting each other.

0:00:36.640,0:00:39.536
So she had all of us[br]come to the front of the classroom,

0:00:39.560,0:00:42.536
and she bought all of us gifts[br]and stacked them in the corner.

0:00:42.560,0:00:43.776
And she said,

0:00:43.800,0:00:46.456
"Why don't we just stand here[br]and compliment each other?

0:00:46.480,0:00:48.056
If you hear your name called,

0:00:48.080,0:00:50.280
go and pick up your gift and sit down."

0:00:51.520,0:00:53.000
What a wonderful idea, right?

0:00:53.880,0:00:55.096
What could go wrong?

0:00:55.120,0:00:56.640
(Laughter)

0:00:57.400,0:00:59.456
Well, there were 40 of us to start with,

0:00:59.480,0:01:01.936
and every time I heard[br]someone's name called,

0:01:01.960,0:01:03.760
I would give out the heartiest cheer.

0:01:04.280,0:01:06.776
And then there were 20 people left,

0:01:06.800,0:01:08.576
and 10 people left,

0:01:08.600,0:01:09.960
and five left ...

0:01:10.560,0:01:11.936
and three left.

0:01:11.960,0:01:13.160
And I was one of them.

0:01:13.720,0:01:15.320
And the compliments stopped.

0:01:16.560,0:01:18.600
Well, at that moment, I was crying.

0:01:20.051,0:01:23.472
And I didn't want to hear "gifts"anymore.

0:01:23.615,0:01:25.297
I didn't want compliments anymore,

0:01:25.329,0:01:28.085
I just wanted to get out of there[br]and sit down.

0:01:28.500,0:01:30.516
And the teacher was freaking out.

0:01:30.540,0:01:34.196
She was like, "Hey, would anyone[br]say anything nice about these people?"

0:01:34.219,0:01:35.436
(Laughter)

0:01:35.460,0:01:38.436
"No one? OK, why don't you[br]go get your gift and sit down.

0:01:38.460,0:01:39.716
So behave next year --

0:01:39.740,0:01:41.836
someone might say[br]something nice about you."

0:01:41.860,0:01:43.620
(Laughter)

0:01:44.420,0:01:46.036
Well, as I'm describing this you,

0:01:46.060,0:01:48.436
you probably know[br]I remember this really well.

0:01:48.460,0:01:50.060
(Laughter)

0:01:50.700,0:01:52.796
But I don't know who felt worse that day.

0:01:52.820,0:01:54.996
Was it me or the teacher?

0:01:55.020,0:01:58.156
She must have realized[br]that she turned a team-building event

0:01:58.180,0:02:00.980
into a public roast[br]for three six-year-olds.

0:02:01.700,0:02:02.956
And without the humor.

0:02:02.980,0:02:05.316
You know, when you see[br]people get roasted on TV,

0:02:05.340,0:02:06.556
it was funny.

0:02:06.580,0:02:08.437
There was nothing funny about that day.

0:02:09.220,0:02:12.236
So that was one version of me,

0:02:12.260,0:02:15.756
and I would die to avoid[br]being in that situation again --

0:02:15.780,0:02:17.660
to get rejected in public again.

0:02:18.340,0:02:19.796
That's one version.

0:02:19.820,0:02:22.276
Then fast-forward eight years.

0:02:22.300,0:02:24.276
Bill Gates came to my hometown --

0:02:24.300,0:02:25.516
Beijing, China --

0:02:25.540,0:02:26.756
to speak,

0:02:26.780,0:02:28.516
and I saw his message.

0:02:28.540,0:02:30.836
I fell in love with that guy.

0:02:30.860,0:02:33.756
I thought, wow,[br]I know what I want to do now.

0:02:33.780,0:02:35.916
That night I wrote a letter to my family

0:02:35.940,0:02:38.236
telling them: "By age 25,

0:02:38.260,0:02:40.876
I will build the biggest[br]company in the world,

0:02:40.900,0:02:42.836
and that company will buy Microsoft."

0:02:42.860,0:02:44.756
(Laughter)

0:02:44.780,0:02:47.396
I totally embraced this idea[br]of conquering the world --

0:02:47.420,0:02:48.620
domination, right?

0:02:49.060,0:02:51.876
And I didn't make this up,[br]I did write that letter.

0:02:51.900,0:02:53.236
And here it is --

0:02:53.260,0:02:55.236
(Laughter)

0:02:55.260,0:02:57.076
You don't have to read this through --

0:02:57.100,0:02:58.876
(Laughter)

0:02:58.900,0:03:02.140
This is also bad handwriting,[br]but I did highlight some key words.

0:03:03.500,0:03:04.716
You get the idea.

0:03:04.740,0:03:06.516
(Laughter)

0:03:06.540,0:03:07.740
So ...

0:03:09.180,0:03:11.196
that was another version of me:

0:03:11.220,0:03:12.900
one who will conquer the world.

0:03:13.780,0:03:15.236
Well, then two years later,

0:03:15.260,0:03:19.196
I was presented with the opportunity[br]to come to the United States.

0:03:19.220,0:03:20.796
I jumped on it,

0:03:20.820,0:03:23.036
because that was[br]where Bill Gates lived, right?

0:03:23.060,0:03:24.276
(Laughter)

0:03:24.300,0:03:26.940
I thought that was the start[br]of my entrepreneur journey.

0:03:27.580,0:03:29.756
Then, fast-forward another 14 years.

0:03:29.780,0:03:31.196
I was 30.

0:03:31.220,0:03:33.596
Nope, I didn't build that company.

0:03:33.620,0:03:35.156
I didn't even start.

0:03:35.180,0:03:39.156
I was actually a marketing manager[br]for a Fortune 500 company.

0:03:39.180,0:03:40.796
And I felt I was stuck;

0:03:40.820,0:03:42.020
I was stagnant.

0:03:42.980,0:03:44.196
Why is that?

0:03:44.220,0:03:46.460
Where is that 14-year-old[br]who wrote that letter?

0:03:47.380,0:03:48.857
It's not because he didn't try.

0:03:49.380,0:03:52.436
It's because every time I had a new idea,

0:03:52.460,0:03:54.436
every time I wanted to try something new,

0:03:54.460,0:03:56.175
even at work --

0:03:56.200,0:03:57.936
I wanted to make a proposal,

0:03:57.960,0:04:01.496
I wanted to speak up[br]in front of people in a group --

0:04:01.520,0:04:03.336
I felt there was this constant battle

0:04:03.360,0:04:06.136
between the 14-year-old[br]and the six-year-old.

0:04:06.360,0:04:08.496
One wanted to conquer the world --

0:04:08.520,0:04:09.736
make a difference --

0:04:09.760,0:04:11.880
another was afraid of rejection.

0:04:12.560,0:04:15.080
And every time that six-year-old won.

0:04:16.959,0:04:20.935
And this fear even persisted[br]after I started my own company.

0:04:20.959,0:04:24.096
I mean, I started[br]my own company when I was 30 --

0:04:24.120,0:04:25.536
if you want to be Bill Gates,

0:04:25.560,0:04:27.600
you've got to start[br]sooner or later, right?

0:04:28.280,0:04:30.816
When I was an entrepreneur,

0:04:30.840,0:04:33.736
I was presented[br]with an investment opportunity,

0:04:33.760,0:04:35.560
and then I was turned down.

0:04:36.240,0:04:37.976
And that rejection hurt me.

0:04:38.000,0:04:41.600
It hurt me so bad[br]that I wanted to quit right there.

0:04:42.480,0:04:43.696
But then I thought,

0:04:43.720,0:04:47.560
hey, would Bill Gates quit[br]after a simple investment rejection?

0:04:48.120,0:04:50.976
Would any successful[br]entrepreneur quit like that?

0:04:51.000,0:04:52.376
No way.

0:04:52.400,0:04:54.376
And this is where it clicked for me.

0:04:54.400,0:04:56.216
OK, I can build a better company.

0:04:56.240,0:04:58.456
I can build a better[br]team or better product,

0:04:58.480,0:05:00.016
but one thing for sure:

0:05:00.040,0:05:01.896
I've got to be a better leader.

0:05:01.920,0:05:03.440
I've got to be a better person.

0:05:03.920,0:05:07.296
I cannot let that six-year-old[br]keep dictating my life anymore.

0:05:07.320,0:05:09.400
I have to put him back in his place.

0:05:10.200,0:05:12.616
So this is where I went online[br]and looked for help.

0:05:12.640,0:05:13.896
Google was my friend.

0:05:13.920,0:05:15.056
(Laughter)

0:05:15.080,0:05:17.640
I searched, "How do I overcome[br]the fear of rejection?"

0:05:18.160,0:05:21.016
I came up with a bunch[br]of psychology articles

0:05:21.040,0:05:23.896
about where the fear[br]and pain are coming from.

0:05:23.920,0:05:27.216
Then I came up with a bunch[br]of "rah-rah" inspirational articles

0:05:27.240,0:05:29.621
about "Don't take it personally,[br]just overcome it."

0:05:30.400,0:05:32.056
Who doesn't know that?

0:05:32.080,0:05:33.656
(Laughter)

0:05:33.680,0:05:35.816
But why was I still so scared?

0:05:35.840,0:05:37.856
Then I found this website by luck.

0:05:37.880,0:05:40.256
It's called rejectiontherapy.com.

0:05:40.280,0:05:42.816
(Laughter)

0:05:42.840,0:05:46.776
"Rejection Therapy" was this game[br]invented by this Canadian entrepreneur.

0:05:46.800,0:05:48.496
His name is Jason Comely.

0:05:48.520,0:05:53.616
And basically the idea is for 30 days[br]you go out and look for rejection,

0:05:53.640,0:05:55.896
and every day get rejected at something,

0:05:55.920,0:05:59.440
and then by the end,[br]you desensitize yourself from the pain.

0:06:00.400,0:06:02.096
And I loved that idea.

0:06:02.120,0:06:03.656
(Laughter)

0:06:03.680,0:06:05.816
I said, "You know what?[br]I'm going to do this.

0:06:05.840,0:06:08.856
And I'll feel myself[br]getting rejected 100 days."

0:06:08.880,0:06:11.296
And I came up with my own rejection ideas,

0:06:11.320,0:06:13.800
and I made a video blog out of it.

0:06:14.800,0:06:16.736
And so here's what I did.

0:06:16.760,0:06:19.696
This is what the blog looked like.

0:06:20.700,0:06:21.900
Day One ...

0:06:22.500,0:06:23.796
(Laughter)

0:06:23.820,0:06:27.060
Borrow 100 dollars from a stranger.

0:06:28.220,0:06:30.956
So this is where I went[br]to where I was working.

0:06:30.980,0:06:32.716
I came downstairs

0:06:32.740,0:06:34.956
and I saw this big guy[br]sitting behind a desk.

0:06:34.980,0:06:36.716
He looked like a security guard.

0:06:36.740,0:06:38.276
So I just approached him.

0:06:38.300,0:06:40.036
And I was just walking

0:06:40.060,0:06:42.396
and that was the longest[br]walk of my life --

0:06:42.420,0:06:44.556
hair on the back[br]of my neck standing up,

0:06:44.580,0:06:47.036
I was sweating and my heart was pounding.

0:06:47.060,0:06:48.276
And I got there and said,

0:06:48.300,0:06:50.956
"Hey, sir, can I borrow[br]100 dollars from you?"

0:06:50.980,0:06:52.316
(Laughter)

0:06:52.340,0:06:54.140
And he looked up, he's like, "No."

0:06:55.140,0:06:56.340
"Why?"

0:06:56.700,0:06:58.996
And I just said, "No? I'm sorry."

0:06:59.020,0:07:00.735
Then I turned around,[br]and I just ran.

0:07:00.759,0:07:02.119
(Laughter)

0:07:03.460,0:07:05.196
I felt so embarrassed.

0:07:05.220,0:07:06.676
But because I filmed myself --

0:07:06.700,0:07:09.836
so that night I was watching[br]myself getting rejected,

0:07:09.860,0:07:11.956
I just saw how scared I was.

0:07:11.980,0:07:14.436
I looked like this kid[br]in "The Sixth Sense."

0:07:14.460,0:07:15.876
I saw dead people.

0:07:15.900,0:07:17.516
(Laughter)

0:07:17.540,0:07:19.076
But then I saw this guy.

0:07:19.100,0:07:20.996
You know, he wasn't that menacing.

0:07:21.020,0:07:23.396
He was a chubby, loveable guy,

0:07:23.420,0:07:26.876
and he even asked me, "Why?"

0:07:26.900,0:07:29.316
In fact, he invited me to explain myself.

0:07:29.340,0:07:30.916
And I could've said many things.

0:07:30.940,0:07:33.236
I could've explained,[br]I could've negotiated.

0:07:33.260,0:07:34.700
I didn't do any of that.

0:07:35.180,0:07:36.700
All I did was run.

0:07:37.660,0:07:40.820
I felt, wow, this is like[br]a microcosm of my life.

0:07:41.420,0:07:43.956
Every time I felt the slightest rejection,

0:07:43.980,0:07:46.116
I would just run as fast as I could.

0:07:46.140,0:07:47.396
And you know what?

0:07:47.420,0:07:49.236
The next day, no matter what happens,

0:07:49.260,0:07:50.756
I'm not going to run.

0:07:50.780,0:07:51.980
I'll stay engaged.

0:07:52.580,0:07:54.636
Day Two: Request a "burger refill."

0:07:54.660,0:07:56.636
(Laughter)

0:07:56.660,0:07:58.956
It's when I went to a burger joint,

0:07:58.980,0:08:01.476
I finished lunch,[br]and I went to the cashier and said,

0:08:01.500,0:08:03.076
"Hi, can I get a burger refill?"

0:08:03.100,0:08:05.276
(Laughter)

0:08:05.300,0:08:07.756
He was all confused,[br]like, "What's a burger refill?"

0:08:07.780,0:08:09.036
(Laughter)

0:08:09.060,0:08:12.716
I said, "Well, it's just like[br]a drink refill but with a burger."

0:08:12.740,0:08:15.236
And he said, "Sorry,[br]we don't do burger refill, man."

0:08:15.260,0:08:16.596
(Laughter)

0:08:16.620,0:08:20.676
So this is where rejection happened[br]and I could have run, but I stayed.

0:08:20.700,0:08:22.836
I said, "Well, I love your burgers,

0:08:22.860,0:08:24.276
I love your joint,

0:08:24.300,0:08:26.396
and if you guys do a burger refill,

0:08:26.420,0:08:27.756
I will love you guys more."

0:08:27.780,0:08:29.036
(Laughter)

0:08:29.060,0:08:31.676
And he said, "Well, OK,[br]I'll tell my manager about it,

0:08:31.700,0:08:34.676
and maybe we'll do it,[br]but sorry, we can't do this today."

0:08:34.700,0:08:36.116
Then I left.

0:08:36.140,0:08:37.996
And by the way,

0:08:38.020,0:08:40.275
I don't think they've[br]ever done burger refill.

0:08:40.299,0:08:41.515
(Laughter)

0:08:41.539,0:08:43.100
I think they're still there.

0:08:43.659,0:08:46.956
But the life and death feeling[br]I was feeling the first time

0:08:46.980,0:08:48.316
was no longer there,

0:08:48.340,0:08:50.076
just because I stayed engaged --

0:08:50.100,0:08:51.716
because I didn't run.

0:08:51.740,0:08:54.100
I said, "Wow, great,[br]I'm already learning things.

0:08:55.020,0:08:56.236
Great."

0:08:56.260,0:08:58.460
And then Day Three:[br]Getting Olympic Doughnuts.

0:08:59.260,0:09:01.780
This is where my life[br]was turned upside down.

0:09:02.620,0:09:04.236
I went to a Krispy Kreme.

0:09:04.260,0:09:05.476
It's a doughnut shop

0:09:05.500,0:09:08.116
in mainly the Southeastern part[br]of the United States.

0:09:08.140,0:09:09.996
I'm sure they have some here, too.

0:09:10.020,0:09:11.275
And I went in,

0:09:11.299,0:09:14.436
I said, "Can you make me doughnuts[br]that look like Olympic symbols?

0:09:14.460,0:09:17.356
Basically, you interlink[br]five doughnuts together ... "

0:09:17.380,0:09:19.620
I mean there's no way[br]they could say yes, right?

0:09:20.140,0:09:22.516
The doughnut maker took me so seriously.

0:09:22.540,0:09:23.756
(Laughter)

0:09:23.780,0:09:24.996
So she put out paper,

0:09:25.020,0:09:27.196
started jotting down[br]the colors and the rings,

0:09:27.220,0:09:29.236
and is like, "How can I make this?"

0:09:29.260,0:09:31.156
And then 15 minutes later,

0:09:31.180,0:09:34.596
she came out with a box[br]that looked like Olympic rings.

0:09:34.620,0:09:36.276
And I was so touched.

0:09:36.300,0:09:38.436
I just couldn't believe it.

0:09:38.460,0:09:42.220
And that video got[br]over five million views on Youtube.

0:09:42.940,0:09:45.036
The world couldn't believe that either.

0:09:45.060,0:09:47.600
(Laughter)

0:09:47.940,0:09:51.156
You know, because of that[br]I was in newspapers,

0:09:51.180,0:09:52.596
in talk shows, in everything.

0:09:52.620,0:09:54.116
And I became famous.

0:09:54.140,0:09:56.276
A lot of people[br]started writing emails to me

0:09:56.300,0:09:58.836
and saying, "What you're[br]doing is awesome."

0:09:58.860,0:10:02.396
But you know, fame and notoriety[br]did not do anything to me.

0:10:02.420,0:10:04.236
What I really wanted to do was learn,

0:10:04.260,0:10:05.476
and to change myself.

0:10:05.500,0:10:08.116
So I turned the rest[br]of my 100 days of rejection

0:10:08.140,0:10:10.036
into this playground --

0:10:10.060,0:10:12.196
into this research project.

0:10:12.220,0:10:14.300
I wanted to see what I could learn.

0:10:14.740,0:10:16.516
And then I learned a lot of things.

0:10:16.540,0:10:18.116
I discovered so many secrets.

0:10:18.140,0:10:21.036
For example, I found if I just don't run,

0:10:21.060,0:10:22.316
if I got rejected,

0:10:22.340,0:10:24.396
I could actually turn a "no" into a "yes,"

0:10:24.420,0:10:26.036
and the magic word is, "why."

0:10:26.060,0:10:30.156
So one day I went to a stranger's house,[br]I had this flower in my hand,

0:10:30.180,0:10:31.596
knocked on the door and said,

0:10:31.620,0:10:33.876
"Hey, can I plant this flower[br]in your backyard?"

0:10:33.900,0:10:35.436
(Laughter)

0:10:35.460,0:10:37.180
And he said, "No."

0:10:38.340,0:10:40.076
But before he could leave I said,

0:10:40.100,0:10:42.036
"Hey, can I know why?"

0:10:42.060,0:10:45.116
And he said, "Well, I have this dog

0:10:45.140,0:10:47.476
that would dig up[br]anything I put in the backyard.

0:10:47.500,0:10:49.156
I don't want to waste your flower.

0:10:49.180,0:10:52.356
If you want to do this,[br]go across the street and talk to Connie.

0:10:52.380,0:10:53.596
She loves flowers."

0:10:53.620,0:10:54.836
So that's what I did.

0:10:54.860,0:10:56.916
I went across and knocked[br]on Connie's door.

0:10:56.940,0:10:58.796
And she was so happy to see me.

0:10:58.820,0:11:00.516
(Laughter)

0:11:00.540,0:11:01.916
And then half an hour later,

0:11:01.940,0:11:03.996
there was this flower[br]in Connie's backyard.

0:11:04.020,0:11:05.436
I'm sure it looks better now.

0:11:05.460,0:11:06.756
(Laughter)

0:11:06.780,0:11:09.716
But had I left[br]after the initial rejection,

0:11:09.740,0:11:10.956
I would've thought,

0:11:10.980,0:11:13.036
well, it's because[br]the guy didn't trust me,

0:11:13.060,0:11:14.276
it's because I was crazy,

0:11:14.300,0:11:16.716
because I didn't dress up well,[br]I didn't look good.

0:11:16.740,0:11:17.956
It was none of those.

0:11:17.980,0:11:20.676
It was because what I offered[br]did not fit what he wanted.

0:11:20.700,0:11:22.956
And he trusted me enough[br]to offer me a referral,

0:11:22.980,0:11:24.636
using a sales term.

0:11:24.660,0:11:26.180
I converted a referral.

0:11:27.260,0:11:28.476
Then one day --

0:11:28.500,0:11:31.396
and I also learned that I can[br]actually say certain things

0:11:31.420,0:11:33.356
and maximize my chance to get a yes.

0:11:33.380,0:11:35.596
So for example,[br]one day I went to a Starbucks,

0:11:35.620,0:11:39.196
and asked the manager,[br]"Hey, can I be a Starbucks greeter?"

0:11:39.220,0:11:41.596
He was like, "What's a Starbucks greeter?"

0:11:41.620,0:11:43.716
I said, "Do you know[br]those Walmart greeters?

0:11:43.740,0:11:47.156
You know, those people who say[br]'hi' to you before you walk in the store,

0:11:47.180,0:11:49.396
and make sure you[br]don't steal stuff, basically?

0:11:49.420,0:11:52.556
I want to give a Walmart experience[br]to Starbucks customers."

0:11:52.580,0:11:54.036
(Laughter)

0:11:54.060,0:11:57.060
Well, I'm not sure[br]that's a good thing, actually --

0:11:58.300,0:12:00.796
Actually, I'm pretty sure[br]it's a bad thing.

0:12:00.820,0:12:02.876
And he was like, "Oh" --

0:12:02.900,0:12:05.156
yeah, this is how he looked,[br]his name is Eric --

0:12:05.180,0:12:06.756
and he was like, "I'm not sure."

0:12:06.780,0:12:08.836
This is how he was hearing me. "Not sure."

0:12:08.860,0:12:10.516
Then I ask him, "Is that weird?"

0:12:10.540,0:12:12.580
He's like, "Yeah, it's really weird, man."

0:12:13.500,0:12:16.356
But as soon as he said that,[br]his whole demeanor changed.

0:12:16.380,0:12:19.316
It's as if he's putting[br]all the doubt on the floor.

0:12:19.340,0:12:21.076
And he said, "Yeah, you can do this,

0:12:21.100,0:12:22.356
just don't get too weird."

0:12:22.380,0:12:23.796
(Laughter)

0:12:23.820,0:12:26.196
So for the next hour[br]I was the Starbucks greeter.

0:12:26.220,0:12:28.356
I said "hi" to every customer[br]that walked in,

0:12:28.380,0:12:30.756
and gave them holiday cheers.

0:12:30.780,0:12:33.436
By the way, I don't know[br]what your career trajectory is,

0:12:33.460,0:12:34.676
don't be a greeter.

0:12:34.700,0:12:35.916
(Laughter)

0:12:35.940,0:12:37.140
It was really boring.

0:12:37.900,0:12:42.836
But then I found I could do this[br]because I mentioned, "Is that weird?"

0:12:42.860,0:12:44.996
I mentioned the doubt that he was having.

0:12:45.020,0:12:48.556
And because I mentioned, "Is that weird?",[br]that means I wasn't weird.

0:12:48.580,0:12:51.116
That means I was actually[br]thinking just like him,

0:12:51.140,0:12:53.516
seeing this as a weird thing.

0:12:53.540,0:12:54.796
And again, and again,

0:12:54.820,0:12:57.956
I learned that if I mention[br]some doubt people might have

0:12:57.980,0:12:59.796
before I ask the question,

0:12:59.820,0:13:01.076
I gained their trust.

0:13:01.100,0:13:03.060
People were more likely to say yes to me.

0:13:03.500,0:13:06.836
And then I learned[br]I could fulfill my life dream ...

0:13:06.860,0:13:08.276
by asking.

0:13:08.300,0:13:11.396
You know, I came[br]from four generations of teachers,

0:13:11.420,0:13:14.236
and my grandma has always told me,

0:13:14.260,0:13:16.556
"Hey Jia, you can do anything you want,

0:13:16.580,0:13:18.636
but it'd be great[br]if you became a teacher."

0:13:18.660,0:13:20.076
(Laughter)

0:13:20.100,0:13:22.356
But I wanted to be[br]an entrepreneur, so I didn't.

0:13:22.380,0:13:25.756
But it has always been my dream[br]to actually teach something.

0:13:25.780,0:13:27.596
So I said, "What if I just ask

0:13:27.620,0:13:30.236
and teach a college class?"

0:13:30.260,0:13:31.716
I lived in Austin at the time,

0:13:31.740,0:13:33.796
so I went to University[br]of Texas at Austin

0:13:33.820,0:13:37.036
and knocked on professors' doors[br]and said, "Can I teach your class?"

0:13:37.060,0:13:39.556
I didn't get anywhere[br]the first couple of times.

0:13:39.580,0:13:42.076
But because I didn't run --[br]I kept doing it --

0:13:42.100,0:13:45.436
and on the third try[br]the professor was very impressed.

0:13:45.460,0:13:47.516
He was like, "No one[br]has done this before."

0:13:47.540,0:13:51.556
And I came in prepared[br]with powerpoints and my lesson.

0:13:51.580,0:13:53.636
He said, "Wow, I can use this.

0:13:53.660,0:13:56.996
Why don't you come back in two months?[br]I'll fit you in my curriculum."

0:13:57.020,0:13:59.000
And two months later[br]I was teaching a class.

0:14:00.140,0:14:03.396
This is me -- you probably can't see,[br]this is a bad picture.

0:14:03.420,0:14:06.196
You know, sometimes you get[br]rejected by lighting, you know?

0:14:06.220,0:14:07.420
(Laughter)

0:14:08.380,0:14:09.596
But wow --

0:14:09.620,0:14:12.356
when I finished teaching that class,[br]I walked out crying,

0:14:12.380,0:14:14.156
because I thought

0:14:14.180,0:14:17.476
I could fulfill my life dream[br]just by simply asking.

0:14:17.500,0:14:20.156
I used to think I have to accomplish[br]all these things --

0:14:20.180,0:14:23.796
have to be a great entrepreneur,[br]or get a PhD to teach --

0:14:23.820,0:14:25.356
but no, I just asked,

0:14:25.380,0:14:26.580
and I could teach.

0:14:27.100,0:14:29.476
And in that picture,[br]which you can't see,

0:14:29.500,0:14:32.796
I quoted Martin Luther King, Jr.

0:14:32.820,0:14:37.356
Why? Because in my research I found[br]that people who really change the world,

0:14:37.380,0:14:40.316
who change the way we live[br]and the way we think,

0:14:40.340,0:14:44.436
are the people who were met[br]with initial and often violent rejections.

0:14:44.460,0:14:46.516
People like Martin Luther King, Jr.,

0:14:46.540,0:14:48.596
like Mahatma Gandhi, Nelson Mandela,

0:14:48.620,0:14:50.156
or even Jesus Christ.

0:14:50.180,0:14:53.556
These people did not[br]let rejection define them.

0:14:53.580,0:14:57.740
They let their own reaction[br]after rejection define themselves.

0:14:58.620,0:15:00.180
And they embraced rejection.

0:15:01.060,0:15:04.276
And we don't have to be those people[br]to learn about rejection,

0:15:04.300,0:15:05.556
and in my case,

0:15:05.580,0:15:07.596
rejection was my curse,

0:15:07.620,0:15:08.876
was my boogeyman.

0:15:08.900,0:15:13.076
It has bothered me my whole life[br]because I was running away from it.

0:15:13.100,0:15:14.820
Then I started embracing it.

0:15:15.600,0:15:18.320
I turned that into[br]the biggest gift in my life.

0:15:19.120,0:15:23.576
I started teaching people[br]how to turn rejections into opportunities.

0:15:23.600,0:15:25.616
I use my blog, I use my talk,

0:15:25.640,0:15:27.536
I use the book I just published,

0:15:27.560,0:15:32.120
and I'm even building technology to help[br]people overcome their fear of rejection.

0:15:34.000,0:15:35.736
When you get rejected in life,

0:15:35.760,0:15:37.976
when you are facing the next obstacle

0:15:38.000,0:15:40.016
or next failure,

0:15:40.040,0:15:41.856
consider the possibilities.

0:15:41.880,0:15:43.096
Don't run.

0:15:43.120,0:15:44.336
If you just embrace them,

0:15:44.360,0:15:46.440
they might become your gifts as well.

0:15:46.960,0:15:48.176
Thank you.

0:15:48.200,0:15:52.544
(Applause)