[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:00.55,0:00:03.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(dramatic music)
Dialogue: 0,0:00:13.84,0:00:16.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(audience applauds)
Dialogue: 0,0:00:18.68,0:00:19.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Hi, I'm Lynne Franklin.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:19.85,0:00:21.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I have one question for you.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:21.81,0:00:24.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How would you like to be a mind reader?
Dialogue: 0,0:00:24.35,0:00:25.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- [Woman] Yes.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:25.50,0:00:27.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- 'Cause part of me is thinking,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:27.09,0:00:31.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I bet your mind's thinking,\N'That's not gonna happen.'"
Dialogue: 0,0:00:31.49,0:00:33.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Here's the truth.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:33.55,0:00:37.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,People's brains process\Ninformation, they think,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:37.70,0:00:40.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in three different ways.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:40.00,0:00:42.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And their body language\Nwill tell you all day long
Dialogue: 0,0:00:42.52,0:00:44.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,what their primary style is.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:44.16,0:00:46.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You just need to know what to look for
Dialogue: 0,0:00:46.49,0:00:48.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and what to do when you see it.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:48.80,0:00:51.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And it's not one of those\Nwhere she's leaning back,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:51.44,0:00:52.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,her arms are crossed, she's frowning,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:52.72,0:00:54.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so she must be unhappy.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:54.95,0:00:59.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's actually understanding\Nhow their brains work
Dialogue: 0,0:00:59.23,0:01:01.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then presenting your\Ninformation in a way
Dialogue: 0,0:01:01.85,0:01:06.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that people can see it,\Nhear it, and feel it
Dialogue: 0,0:01:06.61,0:01:08.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and increase the chances\Nthat they'll say yes
Dialogue: 0,0:01:08.88,0:01:10.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to whatever you're proposing
Dialogue: 0,0:01:10.41,0:01:12.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and also decrease the chances
Dialogue: 0,0:01:12.02,0:01:14.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that you'll do something stupid,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:14.22,0:01:15.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like this.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:15.91,0:01:18.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Back in my 20s before I\Nknew any of this stuff,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:18.87,0:01:21.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I had a client who was\Na corporate controller,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:21.47,0:01:23.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and he would sit across\Nfrom me in meetings
Dialogue: 0,0:01:23.50,0:01:24.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and he was always looking down
Dialogue: 0,0:01:24.68,0:01:26.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with the occasional glance up.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:26.66,0:01:29.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I thought, "Okay,\Nwell he's a numbers guy.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:29.47,0:01:32.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"He just feels comfortable\Nlooking at the numbers."
Dialogue: 0,0:01:32.28,0:01:34.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then as time went on I\Nthought, "Well, you know,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:34.55,0:01:36.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"he's just socially inept,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:36.15,0:01:38.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"and he doesn't know how\Nto give me eye contact."
Dialogue: 0,0:01:38.18,0:01:40.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And finally, because I\Nwas young and stupid,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:40.75,0:01:42.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I thought, "Every time he's looking up,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:42.14,0:01:45.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"he's looking at my\Nchest and I'm offended."
Dialogue: 0,0:01:45.06,0:01:46.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And there was one point I\Nactually in a meeting went,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:46.96,0:01:49.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Excuse me, I'm up here."
Dialogue: 0,0:01:49.47,0:01:52.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ooh, yeah, talk about judgmental.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:52.49,0:01:54.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Here's the scoop.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:54.59,0:01:56.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This guy's brain worked in a way
Dialogue: 0,0:01:56.34,0:01:58.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that he was never gonna\Ngive me eye contact.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:58.86,0:02:00.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And no matter how many times
Dialogue: 0,0:02:00.27,0:02:02.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I modeled the behavior\NI wanted him to use,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:02.94,0:02:06.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,all that did was make both\Nof us feel uncomfortable.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:06.64,0:02:09.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So how can you tell?
Dialogue: 0,0:02:09.12,0:02:12.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How can you read people's body\Nlanguage to read your minds?
Dialogue: 0,0:02:12.66,0:02:14.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We're gonna show you right now.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:14.48,0:02:15.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And that means I'm gonna bring out
Dialogue: 0,0:02:15.84,0:02:19.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,our first body language model, James.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:19.05,0:02:21.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(audience applauds)
Dialogue: 0,0:02:21.36,0:02:22.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thank you James.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:24.12,0:02:28.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,James represents 75% of the world.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:28.25,0:02:29.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You didn't know this about James,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:29.41,0:02:32.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but James is a looker.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:32.41,0:02:36.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(audience laughs)
Dialogue: 0,0:02:36.01,0:02:40.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What that means is that James'\Nbrain thinks in pictures
Dialogue: 0,0:02:40.81,0:02:42.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and images, in pictures and images.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:42.88,0:02:45.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And here's how we can tell\Nthat James is a looker
Dialogue: 0,0:02:45.79,0:02:47.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,from his body language.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:47.01,0:02:49.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,First thing, he stands up tall.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:49.23,0:02:51.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He has good posture.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:51.16,0:02:52.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Second, he is dressed well,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:52.77,0:02:55.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because appearance is\Nimportant to lookers.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:55.86,0:02:57.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The next thing you'll notice
Dialogue: 0,0:02:57.41,0:02:59.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,about James is that he\Nholds a little stress
Dialogue: 0,0:02:59.51,0:03:00.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in his shoulders.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:00.34,0:03:01.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Lift up your shoulders a little bit.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:01.18,0:03:02.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, holds the stress there.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:03.87,0:03:07.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Next thing, you'll notice he\Nhas wrinkles in his forehead,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:07.93,0:03:09.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because James looks up
Dialogue: 0,0:03:09.89,0:03:12.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when he remembers something he has seen,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:12.00,0:03:15.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and he looks up more\Noften than most of us do.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:15.05,0:03:15.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Next thing you'll notice
Dialogue: 0,0:03:15.90,0:03:18.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,about James is that he has\Nthin lips, suck 'em in.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:20.42,0:03:22.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You know, this is a chicken and egg thing.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:22.16,0:03:24.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We're not quite sure why\Nlookers have thin lips,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:24.75,0:03:26.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but most of them do.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:26.05,0:03:28.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And the other thing about\Nlookers is they give you
Dialogue: 0,0:03:28.24,0:03:29.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,lots of eye contact.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:29.43,0:03:31.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Look at 'em, look at 'em, look at 'em.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:31.02,0:03:33.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,All of 'em, look at all of 'em.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:33.58,0:03:35.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thanks James.\N- Thank you.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:35.57,0:03:38.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(audience applauds)
Dialogue: 0,0:03:38.60,0:03:42.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Okay, now that you know\Nthat James is a looker,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:42.21,0:03:46.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,here are the two things you\Ndo to build rapport with him.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:46.18,0:03:49.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The first is that you give\Nhim lots of eye contact,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:49.10,0:03:52.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because he literally believes\Nif you do not look at him,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:52.09,0:03:53.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you are not paying attention to him
Dialogue: 0,0:03:53.95,0:03:56.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and you are ignoring him.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:56.10,0:04:00.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The second thing you do with\Nlookers is you give them words
Dialogue: 0,0:04:00.40,0:04:02.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that have a visual component to it.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:02.53,0:04:04.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I see what you mean.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:04.19,0:04:05.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Or look at this.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:05.80,0:04:08.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Or let's picture working\Ntogether this way.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:08.87,0:04:10.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So you use the type of language
Dialogue: 0,0:04:10.64,0:04:13.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that is going on in James' brain.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:13.59,0:04:18.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Those are lookers, 75%\Nof people in the world.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:18.00,0:04:21.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Our next body language model is Marg,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:21.50,0:04:26.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and Marg represents 20% of\Nthe people in the world.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:26.30,0:04:29.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(audience applauds)
Dialogue: 0,0:04:30.80,0:04:32.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Marg is a listener.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:33.81,0:04:37.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What this means is that\NMarg's brain thinks
Dialogue: 0,0:04:37.35,0:04:40.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in words and sounds, in words and sounds.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:40.73,0:04:42.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And this is the body language
Dialogue: 0,0:04:42.04,0:04:44.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that you will see in a listener.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:44.91,0:04:48.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,First, Marg not as well-dressed as James,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:48.20,0:04:50.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'cause appearance is\Nnot as important to her.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:50.71,0:04:51.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(audience laughs)
Dialogue: 0,0:04:51.54,0:04:52.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Sorry Marg.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:54.57,0:04:57.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Next, Marg has a tendency to look down
Dialogue: 0,0:04:57.41,0:04:59.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and to the left, because\Nthat's where you look
Dialogue: 0,0:04:59.67,0:05:02.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when you're remembering\Nsomething you have heard.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:02.92,0:05:04.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Next thing you'll notice
Dialogue: 0,0:05:04.08,0:05:05.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,about Marg is that a lot of times
Dialogue: 0,0:05:05.49,0:05:07.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,she'll put her head in her hand.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:09.11,0:05:11.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's called telephone posture.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:11.04,0:05:11.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Other things you'll notice
Dialogue: 0,0:05:11.92,0:05:16.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,about Marg is that she has a\Ntendency to mumble to herself.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:16.48,0:05:17.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Go ahead and mumble.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:17.68,0:05:19.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Marg mumbles)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:19.26,0:05:20.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(audience laughs)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:20.87,0:05:23.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And it's not that she's crazy.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:23.74,0:05:25.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's that she thinks in words and sounds,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:25.89,0:05:28.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so she's literally talking to herself.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:28.96,0:05:30.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Another thing you'll notice about Marg,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:30.23,0:05:31.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,yep, she's the pen clicker
Dialogue: 0,0:05:31.65,0:05:34.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the banger on the pen on the table.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:35.82,0:05:39.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,These are listeners, 20%\Nof the people in the world.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:39.12,0:05:40.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thanks Marg.\N- Thank you.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:40.72,0:05:44.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(audience applauds)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:44.00,0:05:45.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- If you wanna appeal to listeners,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:45.74,0:05:46.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you do two things.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:46.70,0:05:49.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The first thing, you do not\Ngive them lots of eye contact,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:49.70,0:05:51.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it freaks them out.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:51.36,0:05:52.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's exactly what was going on
Dialogue: 0,0:05:52.75,0:05:54.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with that corporate controller.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:54.73,0:05:57.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So what you do is that\Nwhen they're speaking,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:57.11,0:05:58.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you look at them and then you look away.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:58.53,0:06:00.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And when you're speaking, you look at them
Dialogue: 0,0:06:00.47,0:06:02.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then look away.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:02.26,0:06:06.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The second thing you do with\Nlisteners is that you use words
Dialogue: 0,0:06:06.80,0:06:07.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that are auditory.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:07.96,0:06:09.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That sounds good to me.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:09.40,0:06:11.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Or let's talk this over.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:11.62,0:06:13.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's the type of\Nlanguage their brain uses,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:13.96,0:06:15.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so you're using that to appeal with them.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:15.76,0:06:18.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Listeners, 20% of the people in the world.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:18.80,0:06:22.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And our final body\Nlanguage model is Marina.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:23.22,0:06:26.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And Marina represents 5%\Nof the people in the world.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:26.34,0:06:27.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Give her a round of applause.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:27.38,0:06:30.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(audience applauds)
Dialogue: 0,0:06:31.99,0:06:34.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Marina is a toucher.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:34.30,0:06:35.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not what you think.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:36.78,0:06:41.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What that means is that\NMarina's brain thinks
Dialogue: 0,0:06:41.61,0:06:45.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in feelings and tactilely,\Nin feelings and tactilely.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:45.52,0:06:48.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And here's the kind of\Nbody language you will see
Dialogue: 0,0:06:48.19,0:06:49.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in a toucher.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:49.45,0:06:51.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,First thing and the biggest\Ntell in touchers is whether
Dialogue: 0,0:06:51.69,0:06:53.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or not they've ever met\Nyou before in their lives,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:53.56,0:06:55.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,they are ready to hug you.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:55.69,0:06:57.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Lynne laughs)
Dialogue: 0,0:06:57.35,0:06:59.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Second thing you'll notice
Dialogue: 0,0:06:59.72,0:07:02.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,about touchers is that they are dressed
Dialogue: 0,0:07:02.16,0:07:04.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for comfort rather than style.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:05.56,0:07:08.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Next thing is that they have full lips,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:08.82,0:07:10.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,give 'em big lips.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:10.32,0:07:11.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(audience laughs)
Dialogue: 0,0:07:11.73,0:07:15.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Same thing, I know, more\Ntouchers have full lips.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:15.56,0:07:16.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Next thing you'll notice
Dialogue: 0,0:07:16.39,0:07:19.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,about touchers is that they\Nhave a tendency to lean in,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:20.57,0:07:23.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because they are trying\Nto decrease the amount
Dialogue: 0,0:07:23.02,0:07:24.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of physical space between you and them
Dialogue: 0,0:07:24.84,0:07:26.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and build rapport that way.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:26.74,0:07:28.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Touchers also have a tendency to reach out
Dialogue: 0,0:07:28.23,0:07:32.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and touch your arm when they're\Nin conversation with you.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:32.49,0:07:35.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And touchers also have\Na tendency to look down,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:35.61,0:07:36.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because that's where you look
Dialogue: 0,0:07:36.82,0:07:39.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when you're remembering\Nsomething you have felt.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:39.90,0:07:40.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thanks Marina.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:40.85,0:07:41.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- Thank you.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:41.68,0:07:44.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(audience applauds)
Dialogue: 0,0:07:45.64,0:07:47.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,- All right, you wanna\Nbuild rapport with touchers,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:47.46,0:07:48.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,5% of the people in the world,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:48.83,0:07:50.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,here are the two things you do.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:50.29,0:07:53.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you feel comfortable,\Nlet them touch you.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:53.52,0:07:55.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(audience laughs)
Dialogue: 0,0:07:55.20,0:07:56.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Appropriately, please.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:58.15,0:08:00.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But if you don't feel comfortable,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:00.23,0:08:02.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because a lot of us if you've\Nnever met somebody before
Dialogue: 0,0:08:02.21,0:08:03.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and they're ready to give you a bear hug,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:03.47,0:08:05.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the last thing you wanna do is is go,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:06.56,0:08:10.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'cause we've all done that,\Nand it does not build rapport.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:10.89,0:08:12.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So if a toucher is coming at you,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:12.99,0:08:14.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and you don't feel comfortable,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:14.01,0:08:14.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,stick your hand out.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:14.95,0:08:17.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Give these people a point\Nof contact with you.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:17.38,0:08:19.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's what they're looking for.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:19.45,0:08:22.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The second thing you do with\Ntouchers is you use language
Dialogue: 0,0:08:22.96,0:08:27.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that either has a feeling\Nto it or is tactile.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:27.07,0:08:29.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I wanna hear how\Nyou're feeling about this.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:29.83,0:08:31.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Let's get in touch.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:31.13,0:08:33.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Reach out and tell me what you think.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:33.42,0:08:36.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's the kind of language\Nthat appeals to touchers,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:36.46,0:08:38.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,people who process information
Dialogue: 0,0:08:38.14,0:08:41.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in feelings and tactilely.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:41.29,0:08:42.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I'm gonna read your mind again,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:42.50,0:08:43.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and you're probably thinking,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:43.33,0:08:45.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"So which one of these three am I?"
Dialogue: 0,0:08:45.24,0:08:47.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Let's figure that out right now.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:47.11,0:08:49.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What I want you to do is close your eyes,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:50.31,0:08:53.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and remember an important memory.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:53.38,0:08:55.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now this could be something\Nfrom your childhood,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:55.38,0:08:56.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,maybe your 10th birthday party.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:56.82,0:08:58.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It could be something that\Nhappened to you last week.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:58.90,0:09:00.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So an important memory.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:01.24,0:09:03.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now I want you to pay attention
Dialogue: 0,0:09:03.21,0:09:05.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to how you're remembering it.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:05.35,0:09:08.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Are you remembering it like a movie
Dialogue: 0,0:09:08.10,0:09:10.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or a series of pictures and images?
Dialogue: 0,0:09:11.04,0:09:14.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Are you remembering by\Nhearing what people said
Dialogue: 0,0:09:14.02,0:09:15.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or describing what happened?
Dialogue: 0,0:09:16.80,0:09:18.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Or are you remembering it how you felt
Dialogue: 0,0:09:18.62,0:09:20.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or how things felt to you?
Dialogue: 0,0:09:22.72,0:09:23.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Okay, open up your eyes.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:23.77,0:09:25.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How many of you remembered\Nit like a movie?
Dialogue: 0,0:09:26.82,0:09:27.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Right, most of you.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:27.98,0:09:29.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How many of you were\Ndescribing it to yourself,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:29.86,0:09:31.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,remembering what people said?
Dialogue: 0,0:09:32.68,0:09:33.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Right, listeners.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:33.52,0:09:36.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And finally, how many of\Nyou remember how you felt
Dialogue: 0,0:09:36.21,0:09:37.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or how things felt to you?
Dialogue: 0,0:09:38.69,0:09:40.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Right, now you know who you are.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:40.52,0:09:41.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's the good news.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:41.57,0:09:43.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Here's the bad news.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:43.01,0:09:44.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You're gonna treat everybody else
Dialogue: 0,0:09:44.49,0:09:47.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as though they think the same way.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:47.43,0:09:50.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And you've already seen\Nhow awful that can be
Dialogue: 0,0:09:50.27,0:09:52.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when you're working with\Na corporate controller
Dialogue: 0,0:09:52.02,0:09:54.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who has a different way of thinking.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:55.03,0:09:58.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Here's my invitation to you.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:58.07,0:10:00.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want you to start paying attention
Dialogue: 0,0:10:00.03,0:10:01.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to other people's body language
Dialogue: 0,0:10:01.88,0:10:05.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to figure out how they think.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:06.36,0:10:08.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because here's the magic part of it.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:08.85,0:10:10.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Once you start presenting your ideas
Dialogue: 0,0:10:10.86,0:10:13.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in a way that they get them,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:13.50,0:10:15.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,they will say yes to you more often.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:16.57,0:10:18.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But here's the scoop too.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:18.60,0:10:22.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not asking you to\Nbecome somebody else,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:22.52,0:10:25.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because you can't change\Nhow your brain works.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:25.34,0:10:27.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's true, you think in all three ways,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:27.94,0:10:30.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but just the way you have a dominant hand,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:30.22,0:10:32.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you have a dominant style.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:32.24,0:10:33.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You can't change that.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:33.71,0:10:37.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But what you can do is\Naccommodate your language,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:37.94,0:10:41.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,both body and verbal, with\Nthe people you're with
Dialogue: 0,0:10:41.09,0:10:43.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in order to build\Nrapport, which allows you
Dialogue: 0,0:10:43.49,0:10:45.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to reach the full spectrum of people
Dialogue: 0,0:10:45.29,0:10:47.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that you're hanging out with.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:47.18,0:10:49.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And here's the other magic thing.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:49.20,0:10:51.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You don't even have to\Nbe in somebody's presence
Dialogue: 0,0:10:51.28,0:10:53.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to figure out how their brains work.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:53.12,0:10:54.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Interested?
Dialogue: 0,0:10:54.83,0:10:58.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Right, all you need to do is listen to
Dialogue: 0,0:10:58.43,0:11:00.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or look at the words they're using.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:00.71,0:11:02.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So if you're in a phone conversation,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:02.36,0:11:03.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,listen for the words.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:03.48,0:11:05.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you're reading an\Nemail, look at the words.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:05.87,0:11:08.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,People who are lookers will\Nuse more visual language.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:08.69,0:11:11.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,People who are listeners\Nwill use more auditory words,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:11.24,0:11:13.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and people who are touchers\Nwill use more feeling
Dialogue: 0,0:11:13.23,0:11:14.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and kinesthetic words.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:14.21,0:11:15.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You don't have to be in that same space
Dialogue: 0,0:11:15.85,0:11:17.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to know who they are.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:17.06,0:11:18.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So here's my challenge to you.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:18.39,0:11:20.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Go back and read some of the emails
Dialogue: 0,0:11:20.81,0:11:23.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that you have sent, and you will notice
Dialogue: 0,0:11:23.93,0:11:25.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,now that you know who you are,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:25.63,0:11:27.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the kind of language that you're using,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:27.43,0:11:28.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and it'll back that up.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:28.33,0:11:29.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It happens with everybody.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:30.49,0:11:32.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So 10 minutes ago,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:32.43,0:11:34.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you didn't think you could\Nread people's body language
Dialogue: 0,0:11:34.46,0:11:35.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to read their minds.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:35.29,0:11:37.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And now you know what to do.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:37.42,0:11:40.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So practice this stuff\Non the people at home
Dialogue: 0,0:11:40.47,0:11:43.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or the people at work,\Nand when you do this,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:43.32,0:11:45.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when you use these tools to build rapport
Dialogue: 0,0:11:45.73,0:11:47.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with all kinds of different people,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:47.37,0:11:50.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you'll become the most\Npersuasive person in the room.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:50.71,0:11:51.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thank you.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:51.66,0:11:54.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(audience applauds)