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This program is brought to you

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by Stanford University.

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Please visit us at stanford.edu.

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Oh, oh, the books.

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Thank you.

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Well, thank you,[br]President Hennessy,

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and to the trustees[br]and the faculty,

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to all of the parents[br]and grandparents, to you,

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the Stanford graduates.

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Thank you for letting me share[br]this amazing day with you.

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I need to begin by letting[br]everyone in on a little secret.

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The secret is that[br]Kirby Bumpus--

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--Stanford class of '08--

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0-8!

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--is my god-daughter.

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So I was thrilled when[br]President Hennessy asked

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me to be your commencement[br]speaker, because this

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is the first time I've been[br]allowed on campus since Kirby's

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been here.

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You see, Kirby's[br]a very smart girl.

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She wants people to get to know[br]her on our own terms, she says,

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not in terms of who she knows.

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So she never wants[br]anyone who's first

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meeting her to know that I[br]know her and she knows me.

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So when she first[br]came to Stanford

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for new student[br]orientation with her mom,

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I hear that they arrived, and[br]everybody was so welcoming,

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and somebody came up to Kirby[br]and they said, oh my god,

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that's Gayle King--[br]because a lot of people

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know Gayle King is my BFF.

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So somebody comes up to Kirby[br]and they say, oh my god,

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is that Gayle King?

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And Kirby's like, uh-huh.

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She's my mom.

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And so the person[br]says, oh my god,

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does it mean, like,[br]you know Oprah Winfrey?

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And Kirby says, sort of.

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I said, sort of?

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You sort of know me?

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Well, I have photographic proof.

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I have pictures,[br]which I can email

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to you all, of Kirby riding[br]horsey with me on all fours.

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So I more than sort[br]of know Kirby Bumpus.

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And I'm so happy[br]to be here, just

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happy that I finally, after[br]four years, get to see her room.

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There is really nowhere[br]else I'd rather be,

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because I'm so[br]proud of Kirby, who

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graduates today with two[br]degrees, one in human bio

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and the other in psychology.

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Love you, Kirby Cakes.

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That's how well I know her,[br]I can call her "Cakes."

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And so proud of her[br]mother and father,

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who helped her get through this[br]time, and her brother Will.

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I really had nothing to do with[br]her graduating from Stanford,

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but every time[br]anybody's asked me

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in the past couple of weeks[br]what I was doing, I'd say,

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I'm getting ready[br]to go to Stanford.

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I just love saying "Stanford."

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Because the truth[br]is, I know I would

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have never gotten my[br]degree at all, because I

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didn't go to Stanford.

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I went to Tennessee[br]State University.

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But I never would have[br]gotten my diploma at all,

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because I was supposed[br]to graduate back in 1975.

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But I was short one credit.

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I was short one credit.

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And I figured, I'm[br]going to just forget it,

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because I'm not going[br]to march with my class.

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Because by that point, I[br]was already on television.

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I'd been in television since[br]I was 19 and a sophomore.

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Granted, I was the[br]only television anchor

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person that had an 111 o'clock[br]curfew doing the 10 o'clock

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news.

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Seriously, my dad was[br]like, [OLD MAN VOICE]

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well, that news is over 10:30.

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Be home by 11.

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But that didn't matter to me,[br]because I was earning a living.

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I was on my way.

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So I thought, I'm going to[br]let this college thing go,

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and I only had one credit.

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But my father, from that[br]time on and for years after,

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was always on my case,[br]because I did not graduate.

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He'd say, [OLD MAN VOICE][br]Oprah Gayle--

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that's my middle name-- I[br]don't know what you're going

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to do without that degree.

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And I'd say, but Dad, I[br]have my own television show.

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And he'd say,[br][OLD MAN VOICE] I still

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don't know what you're going[br]to do without that degree.

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[LAUGHTER]

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And I'd say, but Dad, now[br]I'm going a talk show host.

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He'd say,[br][OLD MAN VOICE] I don't

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know you're going to get[br]another job without that degree.

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[LAUGHTER]

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So in 1987, Tennessee[br]State University

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invited me back to speak[br]at their commencement.

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By then, I had my own show,[br]was nationally syndicated.

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I'd made a movie, had been[br]nominated for an Oscar,

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and founded my company, Harpo.

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But I told them, I cannot come[br]and give a speech unless I can

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earn one more credit, because[br]my dad's still saying I'm not

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going to get anywhere[br]without that degree.

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So I finished my coursework,[br]I turned in my final paper,

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and I got the degree.

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[CHEERING]

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And my dad was very proud.

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And I know that if[br]anything happens,

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that one credit will[br]be my salvation.

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But I also know why my dad[br]was insisting on that diploma,

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because as B.B. King put it, the[br]beautiful thing about learning

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is that nobody can take[br]that away from you.

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And learning is really, in the[br]broadest sense, what I really

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want to talk about today,[br]because your education,

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of course, isn't ending here.

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In many ways, it's[br]only just begun.

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The world has so many[br]lessons to teach you.

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I consider the world, this[br]earth, to be like a school,

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and our life the classrooms.

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And sometimes here on[br]this Planet Earth school,

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the lessons often come dressed[br]up as detours or road blocks,

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and sometimes as[br]full-blown crises.

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And the secret I've[br]learned to getting ahead

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is being open to the[br]lessons-- lessons

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from the grandest[br]universe of all,

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that is, the universe itself.

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It's being able to walk[br]through life eager and open

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to self-improvement[br]and that which

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is going to best help you[br]evolve-- because that's really

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why we're here, to[br]evolve as human beings--

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so to grow into being[br]more of ourselves,

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always moving to the next[br]level of understanding,

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the next level of[br]compassion and growth.

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I think one of the greatest[br]compliments I've ever received,

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I interviewed with a reporter[br]when I was first starting out

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and Chicago, and then many years[br]later I saw the same reporter

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and she said to[br]me, you know what?

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You really haven't changed.

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You've just become[br]more of yourself.

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And that is really what[br]we're all trying to do,

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become more of ourselves.

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And I believe that there is[br]a lesson in almost everything

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that you do in every experience,[br]and getting the lesson

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is how you move forward.

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It's how you enrich your spirit.

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And trust me, I know[br]that inner wisdom

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is more precious than wealth.

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The more you spend[br]it, the more you gain.

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So today, I just want to share[br]a few lessons, meaning three,

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that I've learned in[br]my journey so far.

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And aren't you glad?

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Don't you hate it when somebody[br]says, I'm going to share a few,

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and it's 10 lessons later?

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And you're like, listen,[br]this is my graduation.

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This is not about you.

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So it's only going to be three.

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The three lessons that have had[br]the greatest impact on my life

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have to do with[br]feelings, with failure,

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and with finding happiness.

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A year after I left college,[br]I was given the opportunity

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to co-anchor the 6[br]o'clock news in Baltimore,

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because the whole[br]goal in the media

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at the time I was[br]coming up was that you

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try to move to larger markets.

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And Baltimore was a much[br]larger market than Nashville,

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so getting the 6 o'clock[br]news co-anchor job at 22

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was such a big deal.

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It felt like the biggest deal[br]in the world at the time.

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And I was so proud,[br]because I was finally

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going to have my chance to be[br]like Barbara Walters, which

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is who I'd been[br]trying to emulate

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since the start of my TV career.

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So I was 22 years old[br]making $22,000 a year,

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and it's where I met[br]my best friend, Gayle,

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who was an intern at[br]the same TV station.

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And once we became friends,[br]we'd say, oh my god,

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I can't believe it.

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You're making 22.

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And you're only 22.

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Imagine when you're 40[br]and you're making 40.

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When I turned 40, I was so[br]glad that didn't happen.

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So here I am, 22,[br]making $22,000 a year.

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And yet, it didn't feel right.

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It didn't feel right.

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The first sign, as President[br]Hennessy was saying,

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was when they tried[br]to change my name.

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The news director said[br]to me at the time,

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nobody's going to[br]remember "Oprah,"

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so we want to change your name.

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We've come up with a name we[br]think that people will remember

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and people will like.

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It's a friendly name, Suzy.

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(PETITE VOICE) Hi, Suzy.

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Very friendly.

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You can't be angry with Suzy.

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Remember Suzy.

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But my name wasn't Suzy.

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And you know, I'd grown up[br]not really loving my name,

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because when you're looking[br]for your little name

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on the lunch boxes and[br]the license plate tags,

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you're never going[br]to find "Oprah."

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So I grew up not[br]loving the name,

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but once I was[br]asked to change it,

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I thought, well, it is my[br]name, and do I look like a Suzy

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to you?

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So I thought, no, it[br]doesn't feel right.

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I'm not going to change my[br]name, and if people remember it

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or not, that's OK.

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And then they said they[br]didn't like the way I looked.

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This was in 1976 where your[br]boss could call you in and say,

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I don't like the way you look.

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Now that would be[br]called lawsuit.

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But back then, they[br]could just say,

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I don't like the way you look.

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Which, in case some of you in[br]the back, if you can't tell,

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is nothing like Barbara Walters.

0:10:58.240,0:11:04.040
So they sent me to a salon,[br]where they gave me a perm.

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And after a few days,[br]all my hair fell out

0:11:05.970,0:11:07.140
and I had to shave my head.

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And then they really[br]didn't like the way I look.

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Because now I am black and[br]bald and sitting on TV.

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Not a pretty picture.

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But even worse than being[br]bald, I really hated,

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hated, hated being sent to[br]report on other people's

0:11:25.520,0:11:28.910
tragedies as a part[br]of my daily duty,

0:11:28.910,0:11:31.360
knowing that I was just[br]expected to observe when

0:11:31.360,0:11:35.400
everything in my[br]instinct told me that I

0:11:35.400,0:11:37.130
should be doing something.

0:11:37.130,0:11:38.700
I should be lending a hand.

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So, as President Hennessy[br]said, I'd cover a fire,

0:11:42.460,0:11:46.060
and then I'd go back and I'd try[br]to give the victims blankets.

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And I wouldn't be[br]able to sleep at night

0:11:48.390,0:11:51.250
because of all the things I[br]was covering during the day.

0:11:51.250,0:11:55.230
And meanwhile, I was trying[br]to sit gracefully like Barbara

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and make myself[br]talk like Barbara.

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And I thought, well, I could[br]make a pretty goofy Barbara.

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And if I could figure[br]out how to be myself,

0:12:07.980,0:12:10.040
I could be a pretty good Oprah.

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I was trying to sound[br]elegant like Barbara.

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And sometimes I[br]didn't read my copy,

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because something[br]inside me said,

0:12:16.030,0:12:17.350
this should be spontaneous.

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You know?

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It should be spontaneous.

0:12:18.551,0:12:22.210
So I wanted to get the news as[br]I was giving it to the people,

0:12:22.210,0:12:23.750
so sometimes I[br]wouldn't read my copy

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and it'd be like,

0:12:25.208,0:12:27.440
six people in a pileup on I-40?

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Oh my goodness.

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And sometimes I[br]wouldn't read the copy,

0:12:33.632,0:12:35.090
because I wanted[br]to be spontaneous,

0:12:35.090,0:12:36.631
and I'd come across[br]a list of words I

0:12:36.631,0:12:38.650
didn't know, and mispronounce.

0:12:38.650,0:12:41.735
And one day I was reading copy[br]and I called Canada Ka-na-da.

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And I did just that, I[br]cracked myself up on the air.

0:12:48.510,0:12:52.260
And I decided, this Barbara[br]thing's not going too well.

0:12:52.260,0:12:53.950
I should try being myself.

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But at the same time,[br]my dad was saying,

0:12:56.445,0:12:59.292
Oprah Gayle, this is the[br]opportunity of a lifetime.

0:12:59.292,0:13:01.440
You'd better keep that job.

0:13:01.440,0:13:04.230
And my boss was saying,[br]this is the nightly news.

0:13:04.230,0:13:06.680
You're an anchor,[br]not a social worker.

0:13:06.680,0:13:08.220
Just do your job.

0:13:08.220,0:13:13.730
So I was juggling these messages[br]of expectation and obligation,

0:13:13.730,0:13:16.930
and feeling really[br]miserable with myself.

0:13:16.930,0:13:20.290
I'd go home at night and fill[br]up my journals, because I've

0:13:20.290,0:13:21.790
kept a journal since I was 15.

0:13:21.790,0:13:23.430
So I now have[br]volumes of journals.

0:13:23.430,0:13:25.560
So I'd go home at night[br]and fill up my journals

0:13:25.560,0:13:27.770
about how miserable[br]I was and frustrated,

0:13:27.770,0:13:29.580
and then I'd eat my anxiety.

0:13:29.580,0:13:31.750
That's where I[br]learned that habit.

0:13:31.750,0:13:35.080
And after eight months,[br]I lost that job.

0:13:35.080,0:13:37.470
They said I was too emotional.

0:13:37.470,0:13:39.315
I was too much.

0:13:39.315,0:13:41.440
But since they didn't want[br]to pay off the contract,

0:13:41.440,0:13:43.920
they put me on a talk[br]show in Baltimore.

0:13:43.920,0:13:46.940
And the moment I sat down[br]on that show-- the moment

0:13:46.940,0:13:49.580
I did-- I felt[br]like I'd come home.

0:13:49.580,0:13:57.260
I realized that TV could be[br]more than just a playground,

0:13:57.260,0:13:59.360
but a platform for[br]service, for helping

0:13:59.360,0:14:01.320
other people lift their lives.

0:14:01.320,0:14:04.440
And the moment I sat down[br]doing that talk show,

0:14:04.440,0:14:05.440
it felt like breathing.

0:14:05.440,0:14:08.990
It felt-- it felt right.

0:14:08.990,0:14:13.070
And that's where everything[br]that followed for me began.

0:14:13.070,0:14:15.150
And I got that lesson.

0:14:15.150,0:14:17.550
When you're doing the[br]work you're meant to do,

0:14:17.550,0:14:22.610
it feels right, and every[br]day is a bonus, regardless

0:14:22.610,0:14:24.197
of what you're getting paid.

0:14:27.180,0:14:28.971
It's true.

0:14:28.971,0:14:31.220
And how do you know when[br]you're doing something right?

0:14:31.220,0:14:32.560
How do you know that?

0:14:32.560,0:14:35.010
It feels so.

0:14:35.010,0:14:37.360
What I know now is that[br]feelings are really

0:14:37.360,0:14:40.820
your GPS system for life.

0:14:40.820,0:14:42.570
When you're supposed[br]to do something

0:14:42.570,0:14:47.410
or not supposed to do something,[br]your emotional guidance system

0:14:47.410,0:14:48.470
lets you know.

0:14:48.470,0:14:52.370
The trick is to learn to[br]check your ego at the door,

0:14:52.370,0:14:55.270
and start checking[br]your gut instead.

0:14:55.270,0:15:00.610
Every right decision I've made--[br]every right decision I've ever

0:15:00.610,0:15:04.060
made-- has come from my gut.

0:15:04.060,0:15:09.000
And every wrong decision I've[br]ever made was a result of me

0:15:09.000,0:15:13.840
not listening to the[br]greater voice of myself.

0:15:13.840,0:15:17.680
If it doesn't feel[br]right, don't do it.

0:15:17.680,0:15:19.180
That's the lesson.

0:15:19.180,0:15:22.880
And that lesson alone[br]will save you, my friends,

0:15:22.880,0:15:24.390
a lot of grief.

0:15:24.390,0:15:25.547
Even doubt means don't.

0:15:25.547,0:15:26.630
This is what I've learned.

0:15:26.630,0:15:28.796
There are many times when[br]you don't know what to do.

0:15:28.796,0:15:33.910
When you don't know[br]what to do, get still.

0:15:33.910,0:15:39.820
Get very still, until[br]you do know what to do.

0:15:39.820,0:15:43.850
And when you do get still and[br]let your internal motivation

0:15:43.850,0:15:49.390
be the driver, not only will[br]your personal life improve,

0:15:49.390,0:15:52.480
but you will gain a competitive[br]edge in the working world,

0:15:52.480,0:15:53.280
as well.

0:15:53.280,0:15:56.840
Because as Daniel Pink writes[br]in his bestseller, A Whole New

0:15:56.840,0:15:59.750
Mind, he says we're[br]entering a whole new age.

0:15:59.750,0:16:02.130
And he calls it[br]the conceptual age,

0:16:02.130,0:16:05.220
where traits that set[br]people apart today

0:16:05.220,0:16:07.650
are going to come[br]from our hearts--

0:16:07.650,0:16:10.700
right brain-- as[br]well as our heads.

0:16:10.700,0:16:14.240
It's no longer just the logical,[br]linear, rules-based thinking

0:16:14.240,0:16:15.880
that matters, he says.

0:16:15.880,0:16:20.090
It's also empathy and joyfulness[br]and purpose, inner traits

0:16:20.090,0:16:21.960
that have transcendent worth.

0:16:21.960,0:16:26.480
These qualities bloom when[br]we're doing what we love-- so

0:16:26.480,0:16:28.760
when we're involving the[br]wholeness of ourselves

0:16:28.760,0:16:33.270
in our work, both our[br]expertise and our emotion.

0:16:33.270,0:16:36.440
So I say to you, forget[br]about the fast lane.

0:16:36.440,0:16:39.510
If you really want to fly,[br]just harness your power

0:16:39.510,0:16:41.080
to your passion.

0:16:41.080,0:16:42.200
Honor your calling.

0:16:42.200,0:16:43.820
Everybody has one.

0:16:43.820,0:16:47.190
Trust your heart, and[br]success will come to you.

0:16:47.190,0:16:50.670
So how do I define success?

0:16:50.670,0:16:53.599
Let me tell you,[br]money's pretty nice.

0:16:53.599,0:16:55.390
I'm not going to stand[br]up here and tell you

0:16:55.390,0:16:59.520
that it's not about money,[br]because money is very nice.

0:16:59.520,0:17:02.040
I like money.

0:17:02.040,0:17:03.405
It's good for buying things.

0:17:06.560,0:17:10.089
But having a lot of money[br]does not automatically

0:17:10.089,0:17:12.410
make you a successful person.

0:17:12.410,0:17:17.848
What you want is[br]money and meaning.

0:17:17.848,0:17:20.560
You want your work[br]to be meaningful,

0:17:20.560,0:17:26.270
because meaning is what brings[br]the real richness to your life.

0:17:26.270,0:17:29.390
What you really want[br]is to be surrounded

0:17:29.390,0:17:32.140
by people you[br]trust and treasure,

0:17:32.140,0:17:34.550
and by people who cherish you.

0:17:34.550,0:17:36.290
That's when you're really rich.

0:17:36.290,0:17:38.930
So lesson one,[br]follow your feelings.

0:17:38.930,0:17:41.720
If it feels right, move for it.

0:17:41.720,0:17:44.252
If it doesn't feel[br]right, don't do it.

0:17:44.252,0:17:46.130
Now I want to talk a little bit about failings,

0:17:46.130,0:17:49.040
because nobody's journey is seamless or smooth.

0:17:49.040,0:17:50.060
We all stumble.

0:17:50.060,0:17:51.650
We all have setbacks.

0:17:51.650,0:17:56.142
If things go wrong, you hit a dead end-- as you will--

0:17:56.142,0:18:01.218
it's just life's way of saying, time to change course.

0:18:01.580,0:18:02.924
So ask every failure

0:18:02.924,0:18:04.380
this is what I do.

0:18:05.510,0:18:08.600
Every failure, every crisis, every difficult time,

0:18:08.600,0:18:12.850
I say, what is this here to teach me?

0:18:12.850,0:18:16.540
And as soon as you get the lesson, you get to move on.

0:18:16.540,0:18:19.720
If you really get the lesson, you pass and you don't have[br]to repeat the class.

0:18:19.720,0:18:27.917
If you don't get the lesson, it shows up wearing another pair[br]of pants, or skirt, to give you some remedial work.

0:18:28.951,0:18:34.895
And what I've found is that difficulties come when you don't pay[br]attention to life's whisper,

0:18:35.400,0:18:38.720
because life always whispers to you first.

0:18:38.720,0:18:41.910
And if you ignore the whisper, sooner or later you'll get a scream.

0:18:42.230,0:18:45.589
Whatever you resist persists, but if you ask the right question--

0:18:45.589,0:18:47.090
not why is this happening,

0:18:47.090,0:18:51.880
but what is here to teach me--[br]what is this here to teach me--

0:18:51.880,0:18:55.250
it puts you in the place and space to get the lesson you need.

0:18:55.340,0:18:59.770
My friend Eckhart Tolle, who's[br]written this wonderful book

0:18:59.770,0:19:02.660
called A New Earth[br]that's all about letting

0:19:02.660,0:19:05.030
the awareness of who you[br]are stimulate everything

0:19:05.030,0:19:06.890
that you do, puts it like this.

0:19:06.890,0:19:10.570
He says, don't react[br]against a bad situation.

0:19:10.570,0:19:13.530
Merge with that[br]situation instead,

0:19:13.530,0:19:16.610
and the solution will[br]arise from the challenge.

0:19:16.610,0:19:19.310
Because surrendering yourself[br]doesn't mean giving up.

0:19:19.310,0:19:22.820
It means acting[br]with responsibility.

0:19:22.820,0:19:26.670
OK, many of you know that,[br]as President Hennessy said,

0:19:26.670,0:19:30.790
I started the school in Africa.

0:19:30.790,0:19:33.630
And I founded this[br]school where I'm

0:19:33.630,0:19:36.340
trying to give South African[br]girls a shot at a future

0:19:36.340,0:19:39.710
like yours, Stanford.

0:19:39.710,0:19:42.350
And I spent five[br]years making sure

0:19:42.350,0:19:46.720
that school would be as[br]beautiful as the students.

0:19:46.720,0:19:50.420
I wanted every girl to[br]feel her worth reflected

0:19:50.420,0:19:54.170
in her surroundings, so I[br]checked every blueprint,

0:19:54.170,0:19:57.560
I picked every pillow, I[br]was looking at the grout

0:19:57.560,0:19:59.190
in between the bricks.

0:19:59.190,0:20:01.440
I knew every thread[br]count of the sheets.

0:20:01.440,0:20:04.800
I chose every girl from the[br]villages from nine provinces,

0:20:04.800,0:20:08.630
and yet, last fall, I[br]was faced with a crises

0:20:08.630,0:20:10.050
I'd never anticipated.

0:20:10.050,0:20:12.000
I was told that one[br]of the dorm matrons

0:20:12.000,0:20:14.980
was suspected of sexual abuse.

0:20:14.980,0:20:18.680
Well, that was, as you can[br]imagine, devastating news.

0:20:18.680,0:20:19.740
First, I cried.

0:20:19.740,0:20:22.740
Actually, I sobbed, for[br]about a half an hour.

0:20:22.740,0:20:25.270
And then I said,[br]let's get to it.

0:20:25.270,0:20:27.510
That's all you get,[br]is a half an hour.

0:20:27.510,0:20:31.270
You need to focus on the[br]now, what you need to do now.

0:20:31.270,0:20:34.010
So I contacted a child[br]trauma specialist.

0:20:34.010,0:20:36.440
I put together a team[br]of investigators.

0:20:36.440,0:20:39.390
I made sure the girls had[br]counseling and support.

0:20:39.390,0:20:43.240
And Gayle and I got on a plane[br]and flew to South Africa.

0:20:43.240,0:20:46.850
And the whole time I kept[br]asking that question, what

0:20:46.850,0:20:49.650
is this here to teach me?

0:20:49.650,0:20:52.470
And as difficult as that[br]experience has been,

0:20:52.470,0:20:54.350
I got a lot of lessons.

0:20:54.350,0:20:56.790
I understand now[br]the mistakes I made,

0:20:56.790,0:21:00.240
because I had been[br]paying attention

0:21:00.240,0:21:02.850
to all of the wrong things.

0:21:02.850,0:21:06.470
I built that school[br]from the outside-in,

0:21:06.470,0:21:10.020
when what really mattered[br]was the inside-out.

0:21:10.020,0:21:13.630
So it's a lesson that applies[br]to all of our lives as a whole.

0:21:13.630,0:21:16.240
What matters most[br]is what's inside.

0:21:16.240,0:21:20.400
What matters most is the sense[br]of integrity, of quality,

0:21:20.400,0:21:21.510
and beauty.

0:21:21.510,0:21:22.920
I got that lesson.

0:21:22.920,0:21:26.080
And what I know is that the[br]girls came away with something,

0:21:26.080,0:21:26.750
too.

0:21:26.750,0:21:30.320
They've emerged from this[br]more resilient, and knowing

0:21:30.320,0:21:33.270
that their voices have power.

0:21:33.270,0:21:34.770
And their resilience[br]and spirit have

0:21:34.770,0:21:38.360
given me more than I could ever[br]give to them, which leads me

0:21:38.360,0:21:42.124
to my final lesson, the one[br]about finding happiness-- which

0:21:42.124,0:21:43.540
we could talk about[br]all day, but I

0:21:43.540,0:21:47.070
know you have other[br]wacky things to do.

0:21:47.070,0:21:50.270
Not a small topic this[br]is, finding happiness.

0:21:50.270,0:21:53.250
But in some ways, I think[br]it's the simplest of all.

0:21:53.250,0:21:55.580
Gwendolyn Brooks wrote[br]a poem for her children.

0:21:55.580,0:21:58.080
It's called "Speech[br]to the Young,

0:21:58.080,0:22:01.050
Speech to the Progress-Toward."

0:22:01.050,0:22:05.890
And she says at the end,[br]live not for battles won.

0:22:05.890,0:22:09.460
Live not for the[br]end of the song.

0:22:09.460,0:22:12.470
Live in the along.

0:22:12.470,0:22:15.390
She's saying, like[br]Eckhart Tolle,

0:22:15.390,0:22:17.190
that you have to[br]live for the present.

0:22:17.190,0:22:20.310
You have to be in the moment.

0:22:20.310,0:22:22.610
Whatever has happened[br]to you in your past

0:22:22.610,0:22:26.820
has no power over this present[br]moment, because life is now.

0:22:26.820,0:22:30.890
But I think she's also saying,[br]be a part of something.

0:22:30.890,0:22:34.200
Don't live for yourself alone.

0:22:34.200,0:22:36.860
This is what I know for sure.

0:22:36.860,0:22:41.460
In order to be truly happy,[br]you must live along with

0:22:41.460,0:22:45.630
and you have to stand for[br]something larger than yourself,

0:22:45.630,0:22:49.150
because life is a[br]reciprocal exchange.

0:22:49.150,0:22:54.130
To move forward, you[br]have to give back.

0:22:54.130,0:22:57.100
And to me, that is the[br]greatest lesson of life.

0:22:57.100,0:23:02.307
To be happy, you have[br]to give something back.

0:23:10.100,0:23:11.950
I know you know[br]that, because that's

0:23:11.950,0:23:15.650
a lesson that's woven into the[br]very fabric of this university.

0:23:15.650,0:23:19.130
It's a lesson that Jane[br]and Leland Stanford got

0:23:19.130,0:23:22.380
and one they've bequeathed[br]to you, because all of you

0:23:22.380,0:23:25.840
know the story of how this[br]great school came to be,

0:23:25.840,0:23:29.750
how the Stanfords lost[br]their only child to typhoid

0:23:29.750,0:23:31.520
at the age of 15.

0:23:31.520,0:23:33.800
They had every right and[br]they had every reason

0:23:33.800,0:23:36.670
to turn their backs against[br]the world at that time.

0:23:36.670,0:23:41.260
But instead, they channeled[br]their grief and their pain

0:23:41.260,0:23:43.160
into an act of grace.

0:23:43.160,0:23:44.790
Within a year of[br]their son's death,

0:23:44.790,0:23:48.150
they'd made the founding[br]grant for this great school,

0:23:48.150,0:23:50.000
pledging to do for[br]other people's children

0:23:50.000,0:23:53.150
what they were not able[br]to do for their own boy.

0:23:53.150,0:23:54.332
The lesson here is clear.

0:23:54.332,0:23:55.790
And that is, if[br]you're hurting, you

0:23:55.790,0:23:58.420
need to help somebody[br]else ease their hurt.

0:23:58.420,0:24:01.440
If you're in pain, help[br]somebody else's pain.

0:24:01.440,0:24:04.840
And when you're in a mess, you[br]get yourself out of the mess

0:24:04.840,0:24:06.960
helping somebody out of theirs.

0:24:06.960,0:24:08.950
And in the process,[br]you get to become

0:24:08.950,0:24:12.700
a member of what I call the[br]greatest fellowship of all,

0:24:12.700,0:24:16.530
the sorority of compassion[br]and the fraternity of service.

0:24:16.530,0:24:21.330
The Stanfords had suffered the[br]worst thing any mom and dad can

0:24:21.330,0:24:24.140
ever endure, yet they[br]understood that helping others

0:24:24.140,0:24:25.560
is the way we help ourselves.

0:24:25.560,0:24:28.900
And this wisdom is[br]increasingly supported

0:24:28.900,0:24:30.990
by scientific and[br]sociological research.

0:24:30.990,0:24:34.520
It's no longer just[br]woo-woo soft-skills talk.

0:24:34.520,0:24:37.815
There's actually a helper's[br]high, a spiritual surge

0:24:37.815,0:24:39.400
you gain from serving others.

0:24:39.400,0:24:41.050
So if you want to[br]feel good, you have

0:24:41.050,0:24:42.930
to go out and do some good.

0:24:42.930,0:24:46.620
But when you do good, I hope[br]you strive for more than just

0:24:46.620,0:24:48.960
the good feeling that[br]service provides,

0:24:48.960,0:24:52.790
because I know this for sure,[br]that doing good actually

0:24:52.790,0:24:54.870
makes you better.

0:24:54.870,0:24:57.440
So whatever field[br]you choose, if you

0:24:57.440,0:25:00.430
operate from the[br]paradigm of service,

0:25:00.430,0:25:04.840
I know your life will have more[br]value, and you will be happy.

0:25:04.840,0:25:06.760
I was always happy[br]doing my talk show,

0:25:06.760,0:25:12.990
but that happiness reached[br]a depth of fulfillment,

0:25:12.990,0:25:18.060
of joy, that I really can't[br]describe to you a measure when

0:25:18.060,0:25:22.440
I stopped just being on TV[br]and looking at TV as a job,

0:25:22.440,0:25:26.800
and decided to use[br]television-- to use it and not

0:25:26.800,0:25:31.750
have it use me-- to use it as[br]a platform to serve my viewers.

0:25:31.750,0:25:36.800
That alone changed the[br]trajectory of my success.

0:25:36.800,0:25:40.300
So I know this-- that[br]whether you're an actor,

0:25:40.300,0:25:43.840
you offer your talent in the[br]way that most inspires art;

0:25:43.840,0:25:49.370
if you're an anatomist, you[br]look at your gift as knowledge

0:25:49.370,0:25:51.500
and service to[br]healing; whether you've

0:25:51.500,0:25:55.430
been called, as so many of you[br]here today getting doctorates

0:25:55.430,0:25:59.120
and other degrees to the[br]profession of business, law,

0:25:59.120,0:26:04.320
engineering, humanities,[br]science, medicine--

0:26:04.320,0:26:11.320
if you choose to offer your[br]skills and talent in service,

0:26:11.320,0:26:16.350
when you choose the paradigm of[br]service, looking at your life

0:26:16.350,0:26:22.230
through that paradigm, it turns[br]everything you do from a job

0:26:22.230,0:26:23.820
into a gift.

0:26:23.820,0:26:26.320
And I know you haven't spent[br]all this time at Stanford just

0:26:26.320,0:26:28.340
to go out and get a job.

0:26:28.340,0:26:31.930
So you've been enriched[br]in countless ways.

0:26:31.930,0:26:34.410
There's no better way to[br]make your mark on the world

0:26:34.410,0:26:37.680
than to share that[br]abundance with others.

0:26:37.680,0:26:43.920
My constant prayer for myself[br]is to be used in service

0:26:43.920,0:26:46.690
for the greater good.

0:26:46.690,0:26:48.640
So let me end with one[br]of my favorite quotes

0:26:48.640,0:26:50.450
from Martin Luther King.

0:26:50.450,0:26:53.670
Dr. King said, not[br]everybody can be famous.

0:26:53.670,0:26:56.470
And I don't know if--[br]everybody today seems

0:26:56.470,0:26:58.900
to want to be famous,[br]but fame is a trip.

0:26:58.900,0:27:00.520
People follow you[br]to the bathroom.

0:27:00.520,0:27:03.070
[LAUGHTER]

0:27:03.070,0:27:04.185
Listen to you pee.

0:27:04.185,0:27:06.620
[LAUGHTER]

0:27:06.620,0:27:10.550
Try to pee quietly,[br]it doesn't matter.

0:27:10.550,0:27:13.270
They come out and say,[br]oh my god, it's you.

0:27:13.270,0:27:13.770
You peed.

0:27:13.770,0:27:17.300
[LAUGHTER]

0:27:17.300,0:27:18.295
That's the fame trip.

0:27:18.295,0:27:21.780
So I don't know[br]if you want that.

0:27:21.780,0:27:27.260
So Dr. King said not[br]everybody can be famous,

0:27:27.260,0:27:29.870
but everybody can be[br]great, because greatness

0:27:29.870,0:27:32.661
is determined by service.

0:27:32.661,0:27:34.410
Yet, those of you who[br]are history scholars

0:27:34.410,0:27:35.826
may know the rest[br]of that passage.

0:27:35.826,0:27:39.392
He said, you don't have to[br]have a college degree to serve.

0:27:39.392,0:27:40.850
You don't have to[br]make your subject

0:27:40.850,0:27:42.600
and verb agree to serve.

0:27:42.600,0:27:46.240
You don't have to know about[br]Plato or Aristotle to serve.

0:27:46.240,0:27:49.100
You don't have to know[br]Einstein's theory of relativity

0:27:49.100,0:27:50.130
to serve.

0:27:50.130,0:27:52.900
You don't have to know the[br]second theory of thermodynamics

0:27:52.900,0:27:54.620
in physics to serve.

0:27:54.620,0:27:56.790
You only need a[br]heart full of grace

0:27:56.790,0:27:59.410
and a soul generated by love.

0:27:59.410,0:28:03.180
In a few moments, you'll all[br]be officially Stanford grads '08

0:28:06.760,0:28:10.260
You have the heart and[br]the smarts to go with it,

0:28:10.260,0:28:13.940
and it's up to you to decide,[br]really, where will you

0:28:13.940,0:28:17.730
now use those gifts?

0:28:17.730,0:28:20.120
You've got the diploma, so[br]go out and get the lessons.

0:28:20.120,0:28:24.287
Because I know, great[br]things are sure to come.

0:28:24.287,0:28:26.620
You know, I've always believed[br]that everything is better

0:28:26.620,0:28:27.369
when you share it.

0:28:27.369,0:28:30.340
So before I go, I wanted[br]to share a graduation gift

0:28:30.340,0:28:30.900
with you.

0:28:30.900,0:28:35.230
Underneath your seats, you'll[br]find two of my favorite books,

0:28:35.230,0:28:37.790
Eckhart Tolle's A New Earth,[br]which is my current book club

0:28:37.790,0:28:40.530
selection-- our "New Earth"[br]webcast has been downloaded

0:28:40.530,0:28:44.110
30 million times with that[br]book-- and Daniel Pink's

0:28:44.110,0:28:48.170
A Whole New Mind-- Why Right[br]Brainers Will Rule the Future,

0:28:48.170,0:28:51.450
has reassured me I'm moving[br]in the right direction.

0:28:51.450,0:28:53.580
I really wanted[br]to give you cars.

0:28:56.220,0:28:58.170
But I just couldn't[br]pull that off.

0:28:58.170,0:29:01.353
Congratulations, [WHOOPING] '08.