WEBVTT

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I think we all agree that it takes longer
to grow up today than it did in the past.

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That seems like a fairly
uncontroversial statement,

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and it is backed up by a lot of facts.

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So in 1960, if we take 1960
as a baseline year,

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relatively few people got
any education beyond high school,

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if they even finished high school.

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And 40% of people
didn't even get that far.

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In 1960, the median marriage age
was 20 for women and 23 for men.

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Now it's 27 for women
and 29 for men, and it is still rising.

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So a lot has changed

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in the course of the last 50 years
in the lives of young people.

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So much has changed
in fact, that I propose

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that it is helpful to think of it
as a new life stage of emerging adulthood

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in between adolescence
and young adulthood.

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But why does it take so long
to grow up now,

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so much longer than in the past?

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Why is there this new stage
of emerging adulthood?

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There are four revolutions that took place
in the 1960s and the 1970s

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that set the stage in many ways
for the society that we know today,

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including the new life stage
of emerging adulthood.

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Those four revolutions
are the technology revolution,

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the sexual revolution,

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the Women's Movement,
and the Youth Movement.

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First, the technology revolution.

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The technology revolution
is not just iPhones and iPads,

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or even laptops and the Internet.

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Another huge technology revolution
of the last 50 years has been a transition

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from a manufacturing economy
to a knowledge economy.

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We've gotten so good at making
things with machines

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that we no longer need
so many people to make them.

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Most of us are also aware

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of how a lot of jobs in manufacturing
have gone to other countries.

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But it's not just that.

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Our manufacturing output
is actually six times greater now

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than it was in the 1950s.

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But we are able to do that
with only half as many people.

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So gone are the days

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where a young man could walk
in an automobile factory or a steel plant,

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and make enough money to support
not only himself and his family.

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The new jobs in the knowledge economy

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are in information
and technology and services.

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And all of these require education
beyond high school.

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Those are where you get the best new jobs
in the knowledge economy.

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You have to have some kind of education
beyond high school.

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So now more people get more education
for longer than ever before.

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And that pushes everything else out

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because most people
won't get a stable long-term job

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for several years after
they have finished their education,

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and most people prefer
to wait for marriage and parenthood

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until after they have a stable job.

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The second revolution
is the sexual revolution.

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The invention of the birth
control pill in 1964,

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along with other effective methods
of contraception,

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broke the age-old link between sexuality
and reproduction for the first time.

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And in turn,

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the link between sexuality and marriage
became broken for the first time.

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And so the marriage age
started to go steadily up,

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even as the age of beginning
first sexual relations went down.

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And today, most people begin having
sexual relations in their late teens,

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a decade or more before they enter
marriage and parenthood.

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And so that changes
what the late teens and 20s are like.

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Instead of entering the commitments
of marriage and parenthood,

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people now have this longer spans
of a decade or more

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when they are making
a break in relationships,

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and they are not yet committed
to the structure of family life.

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Number three is the Women's Movement.

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In 1960, not many people
were going to college,

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but there were twice as many men as women
who were college students.

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Today, 58% of undergraduates
are female, only 42% male.

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And women are also half of the students

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in med schools, in law schools,
in business schools.

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That has been truly revolutionary.

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And that has changed how young women think
about their lives and plan their lives.

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It's hard for us to even imagine

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how much pressure there must have been
on a young woman in 1960 to find a man.

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Because if you didn't,

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what else were you going to do
with your life?

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There weren't really hardly
any professions open to you.

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And so that was
what they were most focused on,

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not that they can do anything.

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They, like young men,

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want to use most of their 20s
for making progress

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in their education
and then in their career.

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And that has changed entirely
what the 20s are like

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for both young men and young women.

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And finally, the Youth Movement.

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It used to be that adulthood
was associated with a lot of good things,

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like social status and authority.

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Well, it still is to some extent,
but not so much as it used to be.

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The 60s and the 70s changed that
with the Youth Movement.

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"I hope I die before I get old."

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How many of you are old enough
to remember that?

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Or "Never trust anyone over 30."

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Those were said somewhat tongue in cheek,
but only somewhat.

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Those are truths underlying them.

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Now adulthood and age became diminished,

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and it became youth that was venerated.

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And so young people are no longer
in such a hurry to enter adulthood.

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They preferred to prolong their youth
as long as they could

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and enjoyed it while it lasted.

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So together, those
four changes have resulted

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in this new life stage
of emerging adulthood.

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It used to be that people set up
the stable structure of an adult life

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by about age 20,

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but now it's really true that 30
is the new 20.

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There's a good reason why that phrase
has become more popular.

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Because now the transitions
that used to happen around age 20

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happen closer to age 30 for most people.

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Instead of moving from adolescence
to young adulthood, at about age 20,

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it's the adolescence and then emerging
adulthood for most of the 20s,

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and then the entrance
into a stable young adulthood follows.

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Not everybody is delighted to hear about
the new life stage of emerging adulthood.

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Not everybody is happy

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that it takes longer
to grow up than it used to.

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Quite the contrary, a lot of people
are very unhappy about it.

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And a lot of people think
that the fact that young people enter

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these transitions of a stable
adulthood later in the past

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means there must be
something wrong with them.

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And their parents and grandparents
can't help but look at the progress

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or lack of it of their children
and grandchildren

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toward adult life in their 20s
and think, and maybe say,

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"When I was your age..."

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Because the timetable has really changed,
but I'd like to challenge you

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if you think that way today
to try to think about it differently.

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It doesn't mean there is
something wrong with them.

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It takes longer to prepare yourself
for the knowledge economy

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than it did for a manufacturing
economy, first of all.

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So that's not their fault.

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They are very intently involved
in preparing themselves for their world

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and are trying to find a place
in a very complex economy.

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Secondly, the Women's Movement
has opened up

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a huge range of opportunities
for young women.

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But that is not a bad thing.

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I think few of us would view that
as a negative development.

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It's a good thing. It's a great thing.

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And so, having this life stage
of emerging adulthood,

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allows both young men and young women
to develop their skills for the workplace.

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There is also that wouldn't most of us

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make a better choice of a marriage partner

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at 28, or 29, or 30,
than we would've at 19, or 20, or 21?

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Wouldn't most of us be a better parent

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if we begin at 30 or 31,
rather than 20 or 21?

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I don't think there is
any doubt about that.

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There is also this.

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Having the space for emerging adulthood

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gives young people an unprecedented
and unparalleled period of freedom.

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It's a time when you can do things

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you never could do before
when you were a kid,

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and you really won't be able to do later.

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So if you have a taste for adventure,

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if you'd like to see
what it is like to live

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in a different part of the country
or the world for a while,

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and maybe do some kind
of service project there,

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this is the time to do it.

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If you'd like to take a stab
at a long-shot career,

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like actor, or musician,
or something else in the arts,

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this is the time to do it.

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Because later, it would be
much more difficult

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when you've made those commitments.

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Right now, in emerging adulthood,
nobody else really depends on you.

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That's one of the unique things about it.

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And eventually, people will depend on you.

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That will narrow the range
of your choices.

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During emerging adulthood,

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you have a rare freedom
and a brief freedom,

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and you should make the most of it.

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I'd like to close by saying

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to the young people
who are emerging adults or about to be:

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don't let other stampede you
to adulthood before you are ready.

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Adulthood will still be ready
when you are.

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And a lot of well-meaning people want you
to get there as soon as possible.

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But it's not their life.

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It's your life.

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And you should remind them
of that if necessary.

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Adulthood is something
almost everybody enters eventually.

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And it's a land that once you enter,
you can never really go back.

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So make the most
of your emerging adulthood freedom

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while that lasts.

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Thank you.

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(Applause)