[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:01.00,0:00:11.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Music)
Dialogue: 0,0:00:43.00,0:00:46.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Sanskrit]
Dialogue: 0,0:00:50.00,0:00:52.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is an ode to the mother goddess,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:52.00,0:00:55.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that most of us in India learn when we are children.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:58.00,0:01:00.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I learned it when I was four
Dialogue: 0,0:01:00.00,0:01:03.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,at my mother's knee.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:05.00,0:01:08.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That year she introduced me to dance,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:08.00,0:01:10.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and thus began
Dialogue: 0,0:01:10.00,0:01:13.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,my tryst with classical dance.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:13.00,0:01:16.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Since then -- it's been four decades now --
Dialogue: 0,0:01:17.00,0:01:19.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I've trained with the best in the field,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:19.00,0:01:21.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,performed across the globe,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:21.00,0:01:24.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,taught young and old alike,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:24.00,0:01:26.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,created, collaborated,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:26.00,0:01:28.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,choreographed,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:28.00,0:01:30.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and wove a rich tapestry
Dialogue: 0,0:01:30.00,0:01:33.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of artistry, achievement and awards.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:34.00,0:01:37.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The crowning glory was in 2007,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:37.00,0:01:39.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when I received this country's
Dialogue: 0,0:01:39.00,0:01:41.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,fourth highest civilian award, the Padma Shri,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:41.00,0:01:43.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for my contribution to art.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:43.00,0:01:46.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause)
Dialogue: 0,0:01:47.00,0:01:50.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But nothing, nothing prepared me
Dialogue: 0,0:01:50.00,0:01:53.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for what I was to hear
Dialogue: 0,0:01:53.00,0:01:56.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,on the first of July 2008.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:56.00,0:01:59.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I heard the word "carcinoma."
Dialogue: 0,0:01:59.00,0:02:02.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yes, breast cancer.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:02.00,0:02:05.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,As I sat dumbstruck in my doctor's office,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:07.00,0:02:09.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I heard other words:
Dialogue: 0,0:02:09.00,0:02:12.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"cancer," "stage," "grade."
Dialogue: 0,0:02:12.00,0:02:14.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Until then, Cancer was the zodiac
Dialogue: 0,0:02:14.00,0:02:16.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,sign of my friend,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:16.00,0:02:19.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,stage was what I performed on,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:19.00,0:02:22.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and grades were what I got in school.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:24.00,0:02:26.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That day, I realized
Dialogue: 0,0:02:26.00,0:02:29.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I had an unwelcome, uninvited,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:29.00,0:02:32.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,new life partner.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:32.00,0:02:34.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,As a dancer,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:34.00,0:02:37.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I know the nine rasas or the navarasas:
Dialogue: 0,0:02:37.00,0:02:39.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,anger, valor,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:39.00,0:02:41.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,disgust, humor
Dialogue: 0,0:02:41.00,0:02:43.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and fear.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:43.00,0:02:45.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I thought I knew what fear was.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:45.00,0:02:48.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That day, I learned what fear was.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:49.00,0:02:52.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Overcome with the enormity of it all
Dialogue: 0,0:02:52.00,0:02:54.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the complete feeling of loss of control,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:54.00,0:02:56.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I shed copious tears
Dialogue: 0,0:02:56.00,0:02:59.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and asked my dear husband, Jayant.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:59.00,0:03:02.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I said, "Is this it? Is this the end of the road?
Dialogue: 0,0:03:02.00,0:03:05.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Is this the end of my dance?"
Dialogue: 0,0:03:05.00,0:03:08.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And he, the positive soul that he is,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:08.00,0:03:11.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,said, "No, this is just a hiatus,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:11.00,0:03:13.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a hiatus during the treatment,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:13.00,0:03:16.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and you'll get back to doing what you do best."
Dialogue: 0,0:03:17.00,0:03:19.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I realized then
Dialogue: 0,0:03:19.00,0:03:22.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that I, who thought I had complete control of my life,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:22.00,0:03:25.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,had control of only three things:
Dialogue: 0,0:03:25.00,0:03:28.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My thought, my mind --
Dialogue: 0,0:03:28.00,0:03:30.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the images that these thoughts created --
Dialogue: 0,0:03:30.00,0:03:33.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the action that derived from it.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:33.00,0:03:35.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So here I was wallowing
Dialogue: 0,0:03:35.00,0:03:37.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in a vortex of emotions
Dialogue: 0,0:03:37.00,0:03:39.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and depression and what have you,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:39.00,0:03:42.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with the enormity of the situation,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:42.00,0:03:45.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,wanting to go to a place of healing, health and happiness.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:46.00,0:03:48.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I wanted to go from where I was
Dialogue: 0,0:03:48.00,0:03:50.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to where I wanted to be,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:50.00,0:03:53.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for which I needed something.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:53.00,0:03:56.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I needed something that would pull me out of all this.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:56.00,0:03:58.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I dried my tears,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:58.00,0:04:01.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I declared to the world at large ...
Dialogue: 0,0:04:01.00,0:04:04.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I said, "Cancer's only one page in my life,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:04.00,0:04:07.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I will not allow this page to impact the rest of my life."
Dialogue: 0,0:04:08.00,0:04:10.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I also declared to the world at large
Dialogue: 0,0:04:10.00,0:04:12.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that I would ride it out,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:12.00,0:04:14.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I would not allow cancer to ride me.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:14.00,0:04:16.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But to go from where I was
Dialogue: 0,0:04:16.00,0:04:18.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to where I wanted to be,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:18.00,0:04:20.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I needed something.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:20.00,0:04:22.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I needed an anchor, an image,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:22.00,0:04:24.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a peg
Dialogue: 0,0:04:24.00,0:04:26.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to peg this process on,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:26.00,0:04:29.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so that I could go from there.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:29.00,0:04:32.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I found that in my dance,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:33.00,0:04:35.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,my dance, my strength, my energy, my passion,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:35.00,0:04:37.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,my very life breath.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:38.00,0:04:40.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But it wasn't easy.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:40.00,0:04:43.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Believe me, it definitely wasn't easy.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:43.00,0:04:45.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How do you keep cheer
Dialogue: 0,0:04:45.00,0:04:47.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when you go from beautiful
Dialogue: 0,0:04:47.00,0:04:50.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to bald in three days?
Dialogue: 0,0:04:50.00,0:04:53.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How do you not despair
Dialogue: 0,0:04:53.00,0:04:56.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when, with the body ravaged by chemotherapy,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:56.00,0:04:59.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,climbing a mere flight of stairs was sheer torture,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:59.00,0:05:02.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that to someone like me who could dance for three hours?
Dialogue: 0,0:05:04.00,0:05:06.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How do you not get overwhelmed
Dialogue: 0,0:05:06.00,0:05:09.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,by the despair and the misery of it all?
Dialogue: 0,0:05:09.00,0:05:12.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,All I wanted to do was curl up and weep.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:12.00,0:05:14.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I kept telling myself fear and tears
Dialogue: 0,0:05:14.00,0:05:17.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,are options I did not have.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:17.00,0:05:20.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I would drag myself into my dance studio --
Dialogue: 0,0:05:20.00,0:05:23.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,body, mind and spirit -- every day into my dance studio,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:23.00,0:05:25.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and learn everything I learned
Dialogue: 0,0:05:25.00,0:05:27.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when I was four, all over again,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:27.00,0:05:30.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,reworked, relearned, regrouped.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:30.00,0:05:33.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was excruciatingly painful, but I did it.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:33.00,0:05:35.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Difficult.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:36.00,0:05:39.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I focused on my mudras,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:39.00,0:05:41.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,on the imagery of my dance,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:41.00,0:05:43.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,on the poetry and the metaphor
Dialogue: 0,0:05:43.00,0:05:45.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the philosophy of the dance itself.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:45.00,0:05:47.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And slowly, I moved out
Dialogue: 0,0:05:47.00,0:05:50.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of that miserable state of mind.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:51.00,0:05:53.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I needed something else.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:53.00,0:05:56.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I needed something to go that extra mile,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:56.00,0:05:58.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I found it in that metaphor
Dialogue: 0,0:05:58.00,0:06:01.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which I had learned from my mother when I was four.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:01.00,0:06:04.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The metaphor of Mahishasura Mardhini,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:04.00,0:06:06.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of Durga.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:06.00,0:06:09.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Durga, the mother goddess, the fearless one,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:09.00,0:06:12.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,created by the pantheon of Hindu gods.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:12.00,0:06:15.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Durga, resplendent, bedecked, beautiful,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:16.00,0:06:18.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,her 18 arms
Dialogue: 0,0:06:18.00,0:06:20.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,ready for warfare,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:20.00,0:06:23.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as she rode astride her lion
Dialogue: 0,0:06:23.00,0:06:26.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,into the battlefield to destroy Mahishasur.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:27.00,0:06:29.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Durga, the epitome
Dialogue: 0,0:06:29.00,0:06:31.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of creative feminine energy,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:31.00,0:06:33.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or shakti.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:33.00,0:06:35.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Durga, the fearless one.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:35.00,0:06:37.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I made that image of Durga
Dialogue: 0,0:06:37.00,0:06:39.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and her every attribute, her every nuance,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:39.00,0:06:41.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,my very own.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:41.00,0:06:44.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Powered by the symbology of a myth
Dialogue: 0,0:06:44.00,0:06:47.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the passion of my training,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:47.00,0:06:50.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I brought laser-sharp focus into my dance,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:50.00,0:06:52.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,laser-sharp focus to such an extent
Dialogue: 0,0:06:52.00,0:06:55.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that I danced a few weeks after surgery.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:55.00,0:06:58.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I danced through chemo and radiation cycles,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:58.00,0:07:01.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,much to the dismay of my oncologist.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:01.00,0:07:03.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I danced between chemo and radiation cycles
Dialogue: 0,0:07:03.00,0:07:05.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and badgered him to fit it
Dialogue: 0,0:07:05.00,0:07:08.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to my performing dance schedule.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:10.00,0:07:12.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What I had done
Dialogue: 0,0:07:12.00,0:07:14.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is I had tuned out of cancer
Dialogue: 0,0:07:14.00,0:07:17.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and tuned into my dance.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:18.00,0:07:21.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yes, cancer has just been one page in my life.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:23.00,0:07:25.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My story
Dialogue: 0,0:07:25.00,0:07:27.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is a story of overcoming setbacks,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:27.00,0:07:29.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,obstacles and challenges
Dialogue: 0,0:07:29.00,0:07:31.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that life throws at you.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:31.00,0:07:34.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My story is the power of thought.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:34.00,0:07:37.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My story is the power of choice.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:37.00,0:07:39.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's the power of focus.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:39.00,0:07:42.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's the power of bringing ourselves
Dialogue: 0,0:07:42.00,0:07:45.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to the attention of something that so animates you,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:45.00,0:07:47.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so moves you,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:47.00,0:07:50.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that something even like cancer becomes insignificant.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:50.00,0:07:52.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My story is the power of a metaphor.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:52.00,0:07:54.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's the power of an image.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:54.00,0:07:56.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Mine was that of Durga,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:56.00,0:07:59.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Durga the fearless one.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:59.00,0:08:01.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She was also called Simhanandini,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:01.00,0:08:03.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the one who rode the lion.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:05.00,0:08:07.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,As I ride out,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:07.00,0:08:09.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as I ride my own inner strength,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:09.00,0:08:11.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,my own inner resilience,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:11.00,0:08:14.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,armed as I am with what medication can provide
Dialogue: 0,0:08:14.00,0:08:16.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and continue treatment,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:16.00,0:08:18.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as I ride out into the battlefield of cancer,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:18.00,0:08:21.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,asking my rogue cells to behave,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:23.00,0:08:26.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want to be known not as a cancer survivor,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:26.00,0:08:28.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but as a cancer conqueror.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:28.00,0:08:30.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I present to you an excerpt of that work
Dialogue: 0,0:08:30.00,0:08:33.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Simhanandini."
Dialogue: 0,0:08:33.00,0:08:36.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause)
Dialogue: 0,0:08:36.00,0:08:45.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Music)
Dialogue: 0,0:15:09.00,0:15:44.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause)