[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:00.95,0:00:03.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So people tell me I'm a nice person ...
Dialogue: 0,0:00:06.02,0:00:10.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to the point where it's part\Nof my personal and professional identity
Dialogue: 0,0:00:10.09,0:00:14.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that I'm so nice\Nand able to get along with anyone,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:14.45,0:00:17.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,even my most fierce opponents.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:18.84,0:00:21.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's like my "thing,"\Nit's what I'm known for.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:21.07,0:00:24.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:00:24.06,0:00:26.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But what no one knows ...
Dialogue: 0,0:00:29.06,0:00:30.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is that I was a bully.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:32.71,0:00:35.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Honestly, I didn't think\Nabout it much myself.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:35.14,0:00:38.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I buried the memories for years,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:38.65,0:00:42.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and even still, a lot of it's really hazy.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:42.20,0:00:44.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Denial, by the way, apparently\Nis also one of my things.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:44.87,0:00:46.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:00:46.12,0:00:48.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But the more people started to praise me
Dialogue: 0,0:00:48.70,0:00:51.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for being a liberal who could\Nget along with conservatives,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:51.49,0:00:53.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the more I wrote articles\Nabout being nice
Dialogue: 0,0:00:53.66,0:00:56.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and gave talks about being nice,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:56.71,0:01:00.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the more I felt this hypocrisy\Ncreeping up inside me.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:02.86,0:01:04.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What if I was actually really mean?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:07.88,0:01:10.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When I was 10 years old,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:12.16,0:01:15.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there was a girl in my class\Nat school named Vicky.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:15.20,0:01:16.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Sigh)
Dialogue: 0,0:01:16.67,0:01:18.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I tormented her ...
Dialogue: 0,0:01:20.33,0:01:21.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,mercilessly.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:23.36,0:01:24.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean, everyone did.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:24.77,0:01:26.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Even the teachers picked on her.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:27.77,0:01:29.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It doesn't make it any better, does it?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:30.98,0:01:34.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Vicky was clearly a troubled kid.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:34.34,0:01:36.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She would hit herself\Nand give herself bloody noses
Dialogue: 0,0:01:36.91,0:01:38.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and she had hygiene problems --
Dialogue: 0,0:01:38.45,0:01:40.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,she had big hygiene problems.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:41.19,0:01:43.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But instead of helping this girl,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:43.36,0:01:46.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who was plainly suffering\Nfrom hardships in her life ...
Dialogue: 0,0:01:47.89,0:01:49.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we called her "Sticky Vicky."
Dialogue: 0,0:01:51.82,0:01:53.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I called her "Sticky Vicky."
Dialogue: 0,0:01:56.63,0:02:00.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My clearest memory\Nis standing in the empty hallway
Dialogue: 0,0:02:01.02,0:02:02.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,outside the fifth grade classrooms
Dialogue: 0,0:02:02.97,0:02:05.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,waiting for Vicky\Nto come out of the bathroom,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:05.80,0:02:08.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I have a clipboard and a pen\Nand a survey I've made up,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:09.01,0:02:10.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,asking about shampoo preferences,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:10.80,0:02:13.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like I'm doing a study\Nfor science class or something.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:13.94,0:02:16.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And when Vicky comes out of the bathroom,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:16.36,0:02:19.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I pounce on her and I ask her\Nwhat shampoo she uses.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:19.20,0:02:21.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now, to put this in perspective,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:21.43,0:02:23.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I can't remember the names of my teachers,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:23.50,0:02:26.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I can't remember the names\Nof any of the books I read that year,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:26.54,0:02:29.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I pretty much can't remember\Nanything from fifth grade,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:29.13,0:02:32.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but I remember that Vicky told me\Nshe used White Rain shampoo.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:33.28,0:02:34.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Clear as yesterday,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:34.49,0:02:35.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like it just happened.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:36.78,0:02:37.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And as classes let out,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:37.95,0:02:40.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I ran down the hall shouting\Nat all the other kids,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:40.75,0:02:43.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Sticky Vicky uses White Rain shampoo.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:43.13,0:02:45.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Don't use White Rain shampoo
Dialogue: 0,0:02:45.03,0:02:48.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or you'll smell like Sticky Vicky."
Dialogue: 0,0:02:50.64,0:02:52.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I forgot about this memory\Nfor a long time.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:52.67,0:02:54.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When I finally started remembering it,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:54.53,0:02:56.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I immediately needed to know more.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:56.18,0:02:58.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I reached out to friends\Nand eventually social media,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:58.69,0:03:01.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I did everything I could\Nto try to find Vicky.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:01.05,0:03:03.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I needed to know that she was OK,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:03.88,0:03:05.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and that I hadn't ruined her life.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:07.47,0:03:08.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Sigh)
Dialogue: 0,0:03:08.53,0:03:10.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But what I quickly realized
Dialogue: 0,0:03:10.08,0:03:13.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was I wasn't just trying to figure out\Nwhat happened to Vicky.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:13.37,0:03:15.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was trying to figure out\Nwhat happened to me.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:17.80,0:03:19.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When I was 10 years old,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:19.12,0:03:23.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I treated another human being\Nlike some worthless other ...
Dialogue: 0,0:03:24.82,0:03:26.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like I was better than her,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:27.35,0:03:28.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and she was garbage.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:30.08,0:03:31.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What kind of a nice person does that?
Dialogue: 0,0:03:32.58,0:03:34.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean, I know I was only a kid,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:34.21,0:03:35.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but not all kids do that.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:35.72,0:03:37.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Most kids don't do that, right?
Dialogue: 0,0:03:39.17,0:03:41.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, what if I wasn't nice after all?
Dialogue: 0,0:03:41.56,0:03:44.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was really just a hateful monster.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:45.91,0:03:50.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Then I started to notice myself\Nhaving these mean impulses,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:50.83,0:03:52.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,thinking mean thoughts
Dialogue: 0,0:03:52.70,0:03:53.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and wanting to say them.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:56.03,0:03:59.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Admittedly, most of my mean thoughts\Nwere about conservatives.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:59.22,0:04:04.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:04:04.03,0:04:05.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But not just conservatives.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:05.38,0:04:09.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I also caught myself thinking mean things\Nabout mushy, centrist liberals
Dialogue: 0,0:04:09.51,0:04:11.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and greedy Wall Street bankers
Dialogue: 0,0:04:11.41,0:04:12.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and Islamophobes
Dialogue: 0,0:04:12.89,0:04:14.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and slow drivers,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:14.39,0:04:16.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because I really hate slow drivers.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:16.70,0:04:19.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:04:19.24,0:04:22.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And as I'd catch myself\Nin these moments of hypocrisy,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:22.27,0:04:25.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,either I was just noticing them\Nor they were getting worse,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:25.99,0:04:27.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,especially in the last few years.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:28.15,0:04:30.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And as I felt more hateful --
Dialogue: 0,0:04:30.30,0:04:32.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,rageful, really --
Dialogue: 0,0:04:32.61,0:04:35.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I noticed the world around me\Nseemed to be getting more hateful, too.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:35.87,0:04:38.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Like there was this steady\Nundercurrent of hate
Dialogue: 0,0:04:38.45,0:04:40.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,bubbling up all around us
Dialogue: 0,0:04:40.58,0:04:42.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and increasingly overflowing.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:43.97,0:04:46.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So the plus side, I guess,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:46.48,0:04:51.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is that I realized that hate\Nwas not just my problem,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:51.73,0:04:54.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which is like, the most\Nselfish plus side ever --
Dialogue: 0,0:04:54.85,0:04:56.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:04:56.81,0:05:02.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because now instead of just my own hate\Nand cruelty to try to figure out,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:02.35,0:05:06.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I had a whole world of hate\NI wanted to unravel
Dialogue: 0,0:05:06.36,0:05:08.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and understand and fix.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:10.51,0:05:15.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I did what all overly intellectual\Npeople do when they have a problem
Dialogue: 0,0:05:15.51,0:05:17.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that they want to understand,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:17.08,0:05:18.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I wrote a book.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:18.25,0:05:20.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:21.03,0:05:22.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I wrote a book about hate.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:23.41,0:05:24.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Spoiler alert:
Dialogue: 0,0:05:25.44,0:05:26.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm against it.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:26.62,0:05:29.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:29.42,0:05:32.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now at this point,\Nyou might be thinking to yourself,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:32.02,0:05:33.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Why are y'all worried about hate?
Dialogue: 0,0:05:33.85,0:05:35.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You didn't hate Vicky.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:35.02,0:05:36.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Bullying isn't hate."
Dialogue: 0,0:05:38.47,0:05:39.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Isn't it?
Dialogue: 0,0:05:41.27,0:05:42.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Gordon Allport,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:42.60,0:05:46.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the psychologist who pioneered\Nthe study of hate in the early 1900s,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:46.85,0:05:49.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,developed what he called\Na "scale of prejudice."
Dialogue: 0,0:05:49.36,0:05:55.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,At one end are things like genocide\Nand other bias-motivated violence.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:55.11,0:05:56.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But at the other end
Dialogue: 0,0:05:56.66,0:05:59.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,are things like believing\Nthat your in-group
Dialogue: 0,0:05:59.85,0:06:03.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is inherently superior to some out-group,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:03.47,0:06:08.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or avoiding social interaction\Nwith those others.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:09.58,0:06:10.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Isn't that all hate?
Dialogue: 0,0:06:12.19,0:06:13.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean, it wasn't an accident
Dialogue: 0,0:06:14.02,0:06:17.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that I was a rich kid\Npicking on a poor kid,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:18.98,0:06:23.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or that Vicky, it turns out,\Nwould eventually end up being gay.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:24.86,0:06:28.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Poor kids and gay kids\Nare more likely to be bullied,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:28.98,0:06:32.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,even by kids who also end up being gay.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:33.99,0:06:36.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I know there was a lot going on\Nin my little 10-year-old mind.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:36.92,0:06:39.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not saying hate was the only\Nreason I picked on Vicky
Dialogue: 0,0:06:39.61,0:06:42.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or even that I was consciously\Nhateful or anything,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:42.61,0:06:44.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but the fact is,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:44.46,0:06:49.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the people we discriminate against\Nin our public policies and in our culture
Dialogue: 0,0:06:49.43,0:06:54.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,are also the groups of people\Nmost likely to be bullied in school.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:55.98,0:06:57.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That is not just a coincidence.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:59.80,0:07:01.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's hate.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:03.55,0:07:05.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I am defining hate in a broad way
Dialogue: 0,0:07:07.45,0:07:10.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because I think we have a big problem.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:11.21,0:07:14.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And we need to solve all of it,\Nnot just the most extremes.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:14.90,0:07:16.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So for instance,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:16.17,0:07:18.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we probably all agree\Nthat marching down the street,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:18.76,0:07:22.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,chanting about you should take away\Nrights from some group of people
Dialogue: 0,0:07:22.06,0:07:24.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because of their skin color\Nor their gender,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:24.14,0:07:26.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we'd all agree that's hate, right? OK.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:27.59,0:07:31.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What if you believe\Nthat group of people is inferior,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:32.77,0:07:33.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but you don't say it?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:35.55,0:07:36.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Is that hate?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:37.78,0:07:41.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Or what if you believe\Nthat group of people is inferior
Dialogue: 0,0:07:41.42,0:07:43.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but you aren't aware\Nthat you believe it --
Dialogue: 0,0:07:43.72,0:07:45.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,what's known as implicit bias.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:45.99,0:07:47.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Is that hate?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:47.92,0:07:50.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean they all have\Nthe same roots, don't they?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:50.18,0:07:53.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In the historic patterns\Nof racism and sexism
Dialogue: 0,0:07:53.22,0:07:56.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that have shaped our history\Nand still infect our society today.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:56.33,0:07:57.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Isn't it all hate?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:58.57,0:08:01.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not saying they're the same thing,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:01.09,0:08:03.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just like I am not saying
Dialogue: 0,0:08:03.44,0:08:06.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that being a bully\Nis as bad as being a Nazi,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:06.22,0:08:10.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just like I'm not saying that being a Nazi\Nis the same thing as punching a Nazi ...
Dialogue: 0,0:08:10.64,0:08:16.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:08:16.36,0:08:20.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But hating a Nazi is still hate, right?
Dialogue: 0,0:08:21.29,0:08:24.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What about hating someone\Nwho isn't as enlightened as you?
Dialogue: 0,0:08:25.23,0:08:27.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,See, what I learned
Dialogue: 0,0:08:28.53,0:08:31.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is that we all are against hate
Dialogue: 0,0:08:31.10,0:08:33.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and we all think hate is a problem.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:33.93,0:08:35.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We think it's their problem,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:36.55,0:08:37.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,not our problem.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:38.82,0:08:40.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They're hateful.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:40.69,0:08:43.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean, if I think the people\Nwho didn't vote like me
Dialogue: 0,0:08:43.24,0:08:46.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,are stupid racist monsters who don't\Ndeserve to call themselves Americans,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:46.74,0:08:48.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,alright, fine, I'm not being nice,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:48.45,0:08:49.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I get it.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:49.72,0:08:51.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:08:51.14,0:08:54.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not hateful, I'm just right, right?
Dialogue: 0,0:08:54.43,0:08:56.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:08:56.14,0:08:57.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Wrong.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:59.35,0:09:01.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We all hate.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:02.57,0:09:06.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I do not mean that\Nin some abstract, generic sense.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:06.84,0:09:09.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean all of us ...
Dialogue: 0,0:09:10.57,0:09:12.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,me and you.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:13.68,0:09:18.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That sanctimonious pedestal of superiority\Non which we all place ourselves,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:18.95,0:09:22.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that they are hateful and we are not,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:22.30,0:09:26.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is a manifestation\Nof the essential root of hate:
Dialogue: 0,0:09:26.20,0:09:29.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that we are fundamentally good\Nand they are not,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:31.11,0:09:32.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which is what needs to change.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:33.97,0:09:37.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So in trying to understand and solve hate,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:37.75,0:09:40.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I read every book\Nand every research study I could find,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:40.69,0:09:44.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but I also went and talked\Nto some former Nazis
Dialogue: 0,0:09:44.88,0:09:46.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and some former terrorists
Dialogue: 0,0:09:46.41,0:09:49.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and some former genocidal killers,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:49.05,0:09:53.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because I figured if they could\Nfigure out how to escape hate,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:53.26,0:09:54.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,surely the rest of us could.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:55.62,0:09:59.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Let me give you just one example\Nof the former terrorist I spent time with
Dialogue: 0,0:09:59.83,0:10:01.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in the West Bank.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:01.72,0:10:04.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When Bassam Aramin was 16 years old,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:05.69,0:10:10.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he tried to blow up an Israeli\Nmilitary convoy with a grenade.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:11.83,0:10:14.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He failed, fortunately,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:14.23,0:10:16.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but he was still sentenced\Nto seven years in prison.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:16.68,0:10:19.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When he was in prison,\Nthey showed a film about the Holocaust.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:19.64,0:10:20.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Up until that point,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:20.82,0:10:23.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Bassam had thought the Holocaust\Nwas mostly a myth.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:23.71,0:10:25.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He went to go watch the film
Dialogue: 0,0:10:25.53,0:10:28.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because he thought he would enjoy\Nseeing Jews get killed.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:30.42,0:10:34.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But when he saw what really happened,\Nhe broke down crying.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:35.69,0:10:37.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And eventually, after prison,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:37.14,0:10:40.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Bassam went on to get\Na master's degree in Holocaust studies
Dialogue: 0,0:10:40.53,0:10:44.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and he founded an organization\Nwhere former Palestinian combatants
Dialogue: 0,0:10:44.58,0:10:46.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and Israeli combatants come together,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:47.96,0:10:50.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,work together, try to find common ground.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:52.29,0:10:55.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,By his own account,\NBassam used to hate Israelis,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:57.30,0:11:00.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but through knowing Israelis\Nand learning their stories
Dialogue: 0,0:11:00.48,0:11:02.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and working together for peace,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:02.29,0:11:03.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he overcame his hate.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:05.65,0:11:09.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Bassam says he still\Ndoesn't hate Israelis,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:10.18,0:11:11.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,even after the Israeli military --
Dialogue: 0,0:11:13.23,0:11:15.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,shot and killed his [10]-year-old\Ndaughter, Abir,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:15.64,0:11:17.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,while she was walking to school.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:20.02,0:11:22.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Sigh)
Dialogue: 0,0:11:22.34,0:11:25.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Bassam even forgave the soldier\Nwho killed his daughter.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:26.34,0:11:28.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That soldier, he taught me,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:29.100,0:11:34.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was just a product\Nof the same hateful system as he was.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:39.52,0:11:41.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If a former terrorist ...
Dialogue: 0,0:11:44.17,0:11:48.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,if a terrorist can learn to stop hating
Dialogue: 0,0:11:48.45,0:11:50.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and still not hate\Nwhen their child is killed,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:50.62,0:11:54.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,surely the rest of us can stop our habits
Dialogue: 0,0:11:54.64,0:11:57.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of demeaning and dehumanizing each other.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:57.28,0:12:00.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I will tell you there are stories\Nlike Bassam's all over the world,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:00.64,0:12:02.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,plus study after study after study
Dialogue: 0,0:12:02.62,0:12:07.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that says, no, we are neither designed\Nnor destined as human beings to hate,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:07.76,0:12:11.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but rather taught to hate\Nby the world around us.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:11.41,0:12:12.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I promise you,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:12.61,0:12:16.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,none of us pops out of the womb\Nhating black people or Republicans.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:16.13,0:12:21.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There is nothing in our DNA\Nthat makes us hate Muslims or Mexicans.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:21.51,0:12:22.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,For better or for worse,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:22.74,0:12:26.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we are all a product\Nof the culture around us.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:27.87,0:12:29.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And the good news is,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:29.94,0:12:32.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we're also the ones\Nwho shape that culture,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:34.14,0:12:35.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which means we can change it.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:36.66,0:12:42.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The first step is starting to recognize\Nthe hate inside ourselves.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:42.08,0:12:43.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We need to catch ourselves
Dialogue: 0,0:12:43.72,0:12:46.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and our hateful thoughts\Nin all their forms
Dialogue: 0,0:12:46.22,0:12:47.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in all of us ...
Dialogue: 0,0:12:49.56,0:12:51.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and work to challenge\Nour ideas and assumptions.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:51.95,0:12:53.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That doesn't happen overnight,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:53.42,0:12:54.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I am telling you right here,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:54.80,0:12:57.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it is a lifelong journey,\Nbut it's one we all need to take.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:58.37,0:12:59.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then second:
Dialogue: 0,0:12:59.57,0:13:02.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,if we want to challenge\Nthe hate in our societies,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:02.97,0:13:06.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we need to promote policies\Nand institutions and practices
Dialogue: 0,0:13:06.94,0:13:09.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that connect us as communities.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:10.30,0:13:13.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Literally, like integrated\Nneighborhoods and schools.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:13.39,0:13:15.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That by the way is the reason\Nto support integration.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:15.89,0:13:18.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not just because\Nit's the right thing to do,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:18.17,0:13:21.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but because integration\Nsystematically combats hate.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:21.62,0:13:23.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There are studies\Nthat teenagers who participate
Dialogue: 0,0:13:23.98,0:13:28.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in racially integrated classes\Nand activities reduce their racial bias.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:28.19,0:13:31.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And when little kids go to racially\Nintegrated kindergartens
Dialogue: 0,0:13:31.58,0:13:33.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and elementary schools --
Dialogue: 0,0:13:33.72,0:13:35.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,they develop less bias to begin with.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:36.67,0:13:40.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But the fact is in so many ways\Nand in so many places around our world,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:40.62,0:13:43.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we are separated from each other.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:44.74,0:13:46.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In the United States, for instance,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:46.100,0:13:51.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,three-quarters of white people\Ndon't have any non-white friends.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:52.68,0:13:56.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So in addition to promoting\Nthose proactive solutions,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:56.78,0:14:00.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the other thing we need to do\Nis upend the hate in our institutions
Dialogue: 0,0:14:00.63,0:14:02.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and our policies
Dialogue: 0,0:14:02.09,0:14:06.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that perpetuate dehumanization\Nand difference
Dialogue: 0,0:14:06.85,0:14:08.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and otherizing and hate,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:08.80,0:14:14.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like systems of sexual harassment\Nand sexual assault in the workplace,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:14.56,0:14:18.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or our deeply racially imbalanced
Dialogue: 0,0:14:18.75,0:14:22.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and deeply racially biased\Ncriminal "justice" system.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:22.81,0:14:24.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We need to change that.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:24.49,0:14:26.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Again, it will not happen overnight.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:26.38,0:14:28.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It needs to happen.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:29.76,0:14:30.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then ...
Dialogue: 0,0:14:32.12,0:14:33.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when we connect together
Dialogue: 0,0:14:34.88,0:14:37.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in these connection spaces,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:38.52,0:14:41.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,facilitated by connection systems,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:42.59,0:14:45.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we need to change the way\Nwe talk to each other
Dialogue: 0,0:14:46.99,0:14:48.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and connect with one another
Dialogue: 0,0:14:48.49,0:14:53.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and relate with generosity\Nand open-mindedness
Dialogue: 0,0:14:53.87,0:14:55.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and kindness and compassion
Dialogue: 0,0:14:55.30,0:14:56.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and not hate.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:57.84,0:14:59.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And that's it.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:59.28,0:15:00.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's it.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:00.45,0:15:04.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause)
Dialogue: 0,0:15:04.74,0:15:06.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I have solved it all, right?
Dialogue: 0,0:15:06.86,0:15:08.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's it.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:08.03,0:15:09.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That is pretty much --
Dialogue: 0,0:15:09.21,0:15:10.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there's a few details --
Dialogue: 0,0:15:10.40,0:15:12.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but that's pretty much all we have to do.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:12.38,0:15:14.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's not that complicated, right?
Dialogue: 0,0:15:15.56,0:15:16.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But it's hard.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:18.28,0:15:22.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The hate that we feel\Ntowards certain groups of people
Dialogue: 0,0:15:23.81,0:15:26.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because of who they are\Nor what they believe
Dialogue: 0,0:15:26.69,0:15:30.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is so ingrained in our minds\Nand in our society
Dialogue: 0,0:15:30.12,0:15:31.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that it can feel inevitable
Dialogue: 0,0:15:33.03,0:15:34.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and impossible to change.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:37.39,0:15:38.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Change is possible.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:41.15,0:15:45.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Just look at the terrorist\Nwho became a peace activist.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:47.48,0:15:52.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Or look at the bully who learned\Nto apologize to her victim.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:55.34,0:16:00.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The entire time I was traveling\Naround the Middle East and Rwanda
Dialogue: 0,0:16:00.51,0:16:01.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and across the United States,
Dialogue: 0,0:16:01.92,0:16:06.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,hearing these unbelievable stories\Nof people in communities
Dialogue: 0,0:16:06.03,0:16:08.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who had left entire histories\Nof hate behind,
Dialogue: 0,0:16:08.74,0:16:10.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was still looking for Vicky.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:11.02,0:16:13.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was so hard find her that I hired\Na private investigator
Dialogue: 0,0:16:13.83,0:16:15.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and he found her.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:15.30,0:16:17.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean, he sort of found her.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:17.22,0:16:21.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The truth is, it became clear\Nthat the person I'm calling Vicky
Dialogue: 0,0:16:21.55,0:16:26.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,had gone to extraordinary lengths\Nto hide her identity.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:28.56,0:16:32.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But anyway, a year after\NI began my journey,
Dialogue: 0,0:16:34.56,0:16:36.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I wrote Vicky an apology.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:38.20,0:16:39.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And a few months later,
Dialogue: 0,0:16:40.60,0:16:41.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,she wrote back.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:42.67,0:16:44.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Sigh)
Dialogue: 0,0:16:45.09,0:16:46.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not going to lie,
Dialogue: 0,0:16:46.98,0:16:48.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I wanted to be forgiven.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:53.02,0:16:54.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I wasn't.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:54.19,0:16:55.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Sigh)
Dialogue: 0,0:16:55.82,0:16:58.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She offered me sort of\Nconditional forgiveness.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:58.77,0:17:00.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What she wrote was ...
Dialogue: 0,0:17:01.16,0:17:05.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Messages such as yours\Ncannot absolve you of your past actions.
Dialogue: 0,0:17:06.91,0:17:10.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The only way to do that\Nis to improve the world,
Dialogue: 0,0:17:10.28,0:17:12.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,prevent others\Nfrom behaving in similar ways
Dialogue: 0,0:17:14.09,0:17:15.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and foster compassion."
Dialogue: 0,0:17:17.88,0:17:19.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And Vicky's right.
Dialogue: 0,0:17:21.53,0:17:22.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Which is why I'm here.
Dialogue: 0,0:17:23.60,0:17:24.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thank you.
Dialogue: 0,0:17:24.78,0:17:31.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause)