Hi. My name is Mark.
You know, there's a lot of One Direction fan fiction out there,
but it seems like all the stuff I've read is written by girls.
Which is great, you know, I'm not knocking girls.
Theyre...girls.
But, I just thought it was about time there was some 1D fan fic written by a dude.
Which...I'm one - dude.
So, that's what I did.
And then, I animated it.
Good morning. Y'all ready to order?
I'll have the French Toast, please.
I'll have the sausage biscuit, please.
I'll have the tacos, please.
Harry!
What? It's my favorite food!
Tacos are not for breakfast!
They are now. Introducing Tac-O's.
It's meat-, cheese- and lettuce-flavored O's
in a tortilla bowl.
That's disgusting.
It even makes the milk tastes like tacos.
That's even disgusting-er.
That's not even a word.
Hi guys.
[ALL] Hello, Zayn.
Whoa, new hairdo!
Yeah, what'ya think?
It's...uh...
It's...quite steep.
Bit like a...ski jump.
Which I guess is what you were going for?
[PHONE RINGS]
1D! Come in, 1D!
Oh look! A call from Psymon.
It's an emergency, boys!
Report to 1D HQ ASAP.
No time for breakfast, lads.
The world needs our help!
One Direction, thanks goodness you're here!
What seems to be the trouble, Psymon?
It doesn't look good, boys.
What doesn't look good? Oh, Zayn's new hairdo?
Niall! -[LAUGHS] What?
I will mess you up!
Mess me up? Oh, like your hairdresser messed up your hair?
Oh, it is ON!
Oh! Ow! Ow! Stop it! Oh!
It's on like Donkey Kong. -What?
Boys! Boys! The world is in it's hour of need.
We cannot afford to squabble over [ ].
Why, what's up, Psymon?
Yeah what's up, besides Zayn's hair?
'cause that's really up, isn't it?
It's like weeeesh!
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
Reports are coming in all over town.
Pussycats are going missing by the thousands!
Oh, no! What a catastrophe!
Or should I say, CAT-astrophe?
Ooh! -No, you shouldn't. -[FALSETTO] OK.
We just need to get out there and help people find their pussycats.
It may not be as simple as that.
We have reason to believe Lord Faptaguise is behind this.
[ALL] Lord Faptaguise?
But we defeated him in the Battle of Zindalor.
Well, he's back!
And we all know how much Lord Faptaguise hates pussycats.
So the pussycats didn't just go missing, they've been kidnapped.
Or, should I say, CAT-napped?
cat-, catnipped, yes?
No.
[FALSETTO] Sorry.
So, where is Lord Fapatguise?
His dreaded tank fortress, the Rap-o-Sphere has been spotted
on the outskirts of town...
Good.
...heading East.
Toward the Dimensional Gate.
Yes! We must act swiftly!
If the Rap-o-Sphere escapes to another dimension
with the pussycats on board, we will never see them again.
So, what's the plan?
Liam, Niall and Zayn: you three must infiltrate the Rap-o-Sphere
and found your way to the Control Room.
It no doubt will be heavily guarded by guards.
Niall and Zayn, you must eliminate them,
allowing Liam to gain access to the Control Room.
Easy! -Piece of pudding! -What?
Liam, once inside the Control Room,
you must hack into the Security Terminal,
and open the prison cell doors.
Hey! I'm on it like Donkey Konit.
What? No, wait. What?
Just open the cell doors?
But who's going to round up all the pussycats
and get them out of there?
Yes, all the pussys. That's where you come in, Harry.
You're telling me.
You must go deep into the Marmitian Swamp,
and seek the help of an old knight named Paul.
He will teach you the ancient art of retrieving pussycats.
I don't need help, I can do it alone.
No you can't, Harry. That's why you and Louis
will seek out Sir Paul together.
Only with teamwork, can you save all the pussycats -
including your own!
Oh no, Molly! Did they get Molly?
I thought his name was Dusty?
Depends which web site you read.
Molly? NOOOOOOOOOOOO
Nice.
Thanks, but Fapatguise, he stole my pussycat!
Now, it's personal.
Or, should I say, pussy-nal?
Oof! My balls!
Whew, we made it inside the Rap-o-Sphere!
Now to make our way to the control room.
This place is a maze, how are we going to find it?
Easy, just follow the pipes along the ceiling.
Duh, it's like you've never been inside a Rap-o-Sphere before!
Nerds.
Right, the old knight lives in solitude deep within this swamp
He lives alone? So that makes him... a stag-knight!
That's your worst one yet.
Oof! Now come along
We've been - we've been walking for ages.
Are you sure we're going in the right direction?
Well, we're following the map!
I think we're going the wrong way.
What, do you think I can't read maps?
That, or you're holding it wrong.
What, with my hands? That's how most humans hold things.
But I guess you wouldn't know anything about that.
What, are you saying I'm not human?
I don't know, why don't you ask your four nipples what they think?
Maybe those will give you a clue.
That's it, I'm going this direction.
Harry, come back! We can't go in two directions. We have to go in one direction.
Not anymore, I can save the pussycats myself.
I don't need some old knight to help me, and I certainly don't need you!
Fine. (X12)