[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hello everyone. Nice to see you again.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was really nice to meet you this morning Tim.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Veronica and I want to just make sure that we can make this meeting helpful
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for all of you and to make sure you all got a chance to be heard.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And in order to do that, it can be helpful if we make sure that
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,everybody talks directly to each other
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,rather than about each other and and listens to what each person has said.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Is that OK?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's fine.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thank you.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Brilliant.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We just found that that helps the meetings to run more smoothly.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So we'll, we'll kind of step in.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We're not expecting you to kind of remember that, but we'll just try and step in
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just to make sure everyone feels heard.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So it's one person speaking at a time.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You all have an equal chance to speak and trying to talk to each other about each other.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So maybe we could just start by seeing how things would be for all of you.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Wanted to start with you too, because I know you've had a recent admission
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You've had a corner where he's been.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, it's obviously good to not be in hospital.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But, yeah, I mean, I'm fine, really.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Just the medication.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Are you coping with that?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, just lots and lots of coffee, really energy drinks and going back to bed.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And did you have anything in particular that you wanted to to talk about today?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No, not really.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean, it's whatever these guys want to talk about.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They always seem to be at every single meeting and you know, they're just obsessed.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They're obsessed with what I'm doing and yeah, so if it reassures them and they can chill out of it, then that's all I know.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,OK, so maybe I could just check, check with your mum and dad if they've got something that they would like to add to do to the agenda.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, Mary, what would you like to talk about?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm slightly anxious about Tim being home and slightly anxious about how you, who's Tim being home?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And yeah, just, I want us to all be able to kind of get on and yeah, just Tim, you know, let's set some ground rules with you
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for how you're going to live your life going forward so we don't get you back in hospital.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But also, what about boundaries and ground rules for me so that you're not always, you know, meddling?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We can talk about that.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So for you and Mary, it's more about trying to make things work better at home then.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And there's a fear there about maybe a future relapse.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I like to look after him. I want, I want the best for him.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,3:10\NAnd sometimes he exists. But yeah.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So something about communication, working together? Yeah, Maybe.\NYeah.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And Hugh, how about you? Have you got anything that you would like us to discuss today?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think Mary's underestimating a hue about what he needs to be doing
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And now that I'm retired, and I've said to you, Tim, I've got more time on my hands, and I want to focus on you not staying in your room all day smoking cannabis.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You think?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't know, I can smell the stuff upstairs.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So you know, your mum might sugar coat it, but the fact of the matter is you're out of hospital now.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Maybe we can come up with an agreement about putting some firm boundaries down, which I know you haven't had before.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And that was partly my fault because I was working full time.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not. All he cares about is his hobbies.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He doesn't actually.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He's pretending he cares about a mum and would it be better if you've directed that to your dad?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,OK, well, I just feel like you worked all your life, you really never saw you.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And now you've retired and all you care about is golf and swinging.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then you come in this meeting and you say that just because I have the odd joint that it's all down to me.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But he has just come out of hospital. We need to look after him.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, I know that.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But, you know, it's our time now.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We've I've spent 45 years working to bring up a family.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We haven't been on a family holiday for 12 years because we're always coming back to rescue Tim.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And you know, I've never asked. I've never.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They do this all the time. They come and they throw it back in my face.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I've never asked them to help me.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I like to help you. I like to help you.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I like to do things for you, but it says I used to do things for you when you were working.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, it's about small things. It doesn't mean that we have to.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You have to go out.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You know, we're talking about diet and exercise that can help you.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But you know, this energy drink things every day, this coffee, this cannabis use, you know, just cut it back at least a bit.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But those things are helping me. That is what is helping me have energy.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And if you're so obsessed with me getting a job and do it, following in your footsteps, that's the only way I'm going to get there.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think you're a bit hard for me. I do think you're a bit hard for me.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We need to give him some time.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If we push him too hard, he could go back into it Seems like there's some kind of different views
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,about how best to help Tim and the context of everything that's happened.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And it seems like it's wanting the best for Tim, isn't it?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And and Tim, you feeling hurt as well in what you're experiencing, Want me to be a robot that doesn't embarrass them?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I can assure you that is not the case.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Tim. We've got three other children.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They're working full time.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They have to be up in the morning early and you're playing your music till 2:00 in the morning.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You think we can't hear you? And the smell of the cannabis coming through the windows.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You're up all the night, you're asleep all the day.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Just, you know, listen to what your mum and I want to do with you rather than me staying up all night.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Do you think I'm being unreasonable, You staying up all night?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, The thing is, is that what you guys, you don't realise how much pressure I'm under.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I've actually got a really important role and I know you don't believe it, but I have actually got, I am working actually.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I know the music seems loud to you, but that is the way that I communicate.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He's at home, we know where he is, so I don't mind that you sleep all day.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You're tired.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't mind that.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Do you want to say a bit more of it?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What do you, what do you want to explain to parents?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, they're making out like I do nothing, but actually I do have a very important role that I have to do.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Can you direct that to you?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Then what? What is your role?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I'm responsible. I'm actually responsible. You should be thanking me, not having a go at me.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If it wasn't for me, your other 3 golden children wouldn't even be able to get them for her.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Actually, Paul was it there?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What does that feel like to hear?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Tim. Tim say those.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, they're not golden children, aren't they? I mean, we treat you all the same.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We love you all the same.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Why would they be golden children?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And what is your role, Tim?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What is this role that you're you're telling us about?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I get messages, I get messages.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I know you don't believe in it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I'm not even in about telling you because I think it's important that you do too
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because I think your mum and dad will understand more if you can explain it to them.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,OK, so it's and I didn't change this.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I didn't actually want this to happen, but I'm glad to actually now because I think, I think I'm doing a pretty good job of it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But God has asked me to make sure that everybody gets to work on time, and that's why I have to stay at home all the time.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,OK, that still doesn't change
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I hear what you said some, but it still doesn't change the fact that you're at home nearly all the time.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yes, because I'm there's going to be more instructions.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I've only this is only the, the, the very start of it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I've got to be there and I've got to wait for these instructions.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What about if some days something really bad is going to happen?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What about some days, Tim, you and I can go out for a walk, even for 15 minutes
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just to get out to give you some exercise because I've noticed you're carrying a bit of weight at the moment.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I just want to I just want to forward to can you can I just want to check what it was like to hear Tim explaining
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,explaining his perspective on his experiences at the moment before we go on to kind of think it was quite scary.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You know, I was quite scared to hear that's how he felt.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What feels scary about it?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Can you explain that he's getting unwell again if he thinks God's speaking to him?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't know, maybe it's a worry.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's I can understand that's a worry.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I thought that's why you took the medication, the pills, so that you wouldn't feel, you wouldn't hear things and believe things like that.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I thought that the pills were a cure.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So it feels scary for your parents to, I guess, to those who are experienced.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean, I don't, I'm. actually, I don't even need the medication.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm just taking it too.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And you think I'm not doing anything to please you guys?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm taking it just to keep you guys happy, to keep you off my back.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Doesn't make any difference.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But how did it feel for you when you explained that to your parents?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because you seemed quite reluctant initially and you didn't want to elaborate on it but hopes that feel?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No, I just think that they don't believe me and they just don't see it from my point of view.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They don't understand how important it is, this role that I've got and they just see me as some loser.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I, I think that actually I'm kind of pleased that I've got, you know, that I've been chosen, but it's just these guys are getting in the way of it.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I feel frustrated.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But can you understand what they're expressing when they hear that?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because you are experiencing that, but they're not.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What I'm trying to say is the reaction from your your dad in particular seems to upset you quite a lot.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Can you understand why he's doing this?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He just all he cares about is what people think other people think.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And what do you think is intentions or of them just to preserve his own ego.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Sounds like there's different perspective on on what's going on.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And it's important for you to explain that experience that you're having to that's important for you, you to to kind of find solutions, isn't it?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And to get moving the way forward.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So that it sounds like it's the worry for you, Mary, about him getting on my game, if that's happening.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It is, yeah
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I mean, sometimes I think your dad's right. And other times I've just I'm just worried that you're going to relapse.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And when you talk like this, it feels like you're not in a good place, although you think you're in a good place.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Absolutely fine.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If anything, I'm better than before.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's just kind of given me a really new perspective.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When you say relapse, do you mean to going back to hospital?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's what I'm worried about.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I know we would struggle to have you at home and if you were really unwell, so that's the best place for you.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I don't want you to go back there.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want you to continue to take your medication.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want you to get out and do things like with your dad as well, but I like it when you're at home as well because I know where you are.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I can keep you safe.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is what I'm talking about.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, so thank you for telling me about the way you feel, but I just want to be clear that the cannabis use can't go on in our home.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,As much as your mum wants you to be home at any cost, I'm not prepared to have you at home at any cost.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So this cannabis use has to be replaced by something else, and I want that to be exercise or thinking about other things to do outside the home.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You said you like drums before you like music.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What about getting out instead of staying at home all the time?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think it's really, really helpful that we've heard the perspectives and although they seem quite different, there are some things that you have in common, I think.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And you clearly want things to be different, don't you?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is not how you think what things ought to be.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I just wondered, is there anything that you can point to at the moment that's going well?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We're all in the house together.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,OK.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, we do eat.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We have an evening meal.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's and I like it when you're having an evening meal with us.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It'd be like you being mad too, right.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,OK.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So you're able to have meals together?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Everything else.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So you're back home?\N
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Obviously.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not being in the hospital.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It feels good.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Are there things that you're doing together apart from eating meals?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Do you tend to do your own things?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, I tend to look after the house, so yeah, Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In and see Tim in his room.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'll bring in his laundry and we have a little chat, don't we, son?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, we did a couple of crosswords, didn't we?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We did.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So is there anything else you're doing there that you do for yourself?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The house works fine, but it's not going to keep it going, is it?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No, but you know.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No, not really.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You haven't got much time on your hands at the moment.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I just feel like my whole existence is Tim.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm just just worried that.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So you don't have much time together to do.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, we have, I think.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think Mary's underestimating the impact of having a son who's unwell as having on the family.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I've just retired now, I'm 65 years old.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I know you're a lot younger than me, but we haven't been on a holiday since the children were little before Tim was unwell.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I want to spend the last years of my life, at least with my wife sometime having a life instead of cleaning up the mess.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Sometimes Tim visit from this house.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want it to change.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I can I can hear that's really important to you with the with the situation that's yeah affecting all of you.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Just the wanting things to change and the worry about it, Mary.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And they're just wanting to get your your perspective across, Tim, about what you're experiencing.\N16:38\NSo we're not going to get to solutions on that today, but we we kind of need to end this meeting.\N16:43\NBut I just wanted to check how you found meeting today.\N16:47\NHow have you found, how have you found meeting with us?\N16:50\NHow have you found us?\N16:52\NWhat's, what's it been like to talk these things through?\N16:54\NIt's nice to have had a space and some time.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So we're not going to get to solutions on that today, but we we kind of need to end this meeting.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I just wanted to check how you found meeting today.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How have you found, how have you found meeting with us?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How have you found us?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What's, what's it been like to talk these things through?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's nice to have had a space and some time.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, to just sit and like we have meals together, but we don't tend to talk this candidly.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So it's nice to be able to actually hear what Hugh really thinks about how I mollycoddle Tim, I suppose.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And it's just a realisation, I suppose, and how Tim feels.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Maybe I'm a little bit overbearing.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So how about you, Tim?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How have you found it?
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I haven't, I haven't found it easily, but I think I can see that maybe it's a good thing.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't want them to be unhappy and don't want them to be worried about me.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So if this helps, I'm pleased we have the meeting, as difficult as it is.
Dialogue: 0,9:59:59.99,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I just want Tim to know that if you want to go out for a walk with your dad, I've got the time now to do that when maybe I didn't have the time when he was young.\NSo thank you, thank you, thank you for meeting.