WEBVTT

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Mindfulness.

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It's really become
quite the buzzword in recent times

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even though mindfulness practices
have been used for millennia.

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Most of us agree

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that mindfulness practices
are a positive thing

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and would benefit our life.

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There's abundant research

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illustrating the positive effect
that mindfulness practices have

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on quality of life, improved focus,
and decreased stress.

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From Fortune 500 companies
to elementary schools,

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mindfulness practices
are being used every day

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in practical application
and controlled studies

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with wonderful outcomes.

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Unfortunately,

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most of us tend to pump the brakes

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when we think about sequestering
even a small amount of time

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or a quiet space

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to practice mindfulness.

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You might think to yourself,

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"A quiet space?

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Ten minutes?

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What?

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Forget it.

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I don't have time."

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Out of survival in the moment,

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we allow screaming children,

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occupational pressures,

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general life stress,

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and technological distractions

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to consume our precious minutes.

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The result of brushing
mindfulness practices aside

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is more stress

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and a decreased quality of life.

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What if I told you
that the benefits of mindfulness

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could be obtained
in as little as 30 seconds

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in almost any setting?

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You might think
that I'm selling snake oil

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or, at a minimum,
it's too good to be true.

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The reality is

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it is true

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and is being done regularly

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by people that I've trained in the method
that I'm about to share with you,

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ranging from elite athletes
to doctors to parents.

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I first developed the technique
I call "the 3x3 Method"

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when my daughter was about one year old.

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For those of you with children,
you know that parenting brings great joy

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but also an incredible amount of stress.

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I found myself experiencing
increased muscle tension,

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headaches, and anxiety

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as I rushed from home to work
to home to the playground,

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to home to bed to work
to home to the playground,

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and on and on the carousel went.

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I became extremely uncomfortable,

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and so I set out to do something about it.

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Now, as a psychotherapist

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working in the high-pressured
environment of the Silicon Valley,

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I am inherently passionate
about mindfulness techniques.

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Thought I had it in the bag.

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I set out to give it a try.

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Unfortunately,

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I fell right into the "hurry, hurry,
hurry, I don't have time" trap.

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What'd that get me?

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More stress, more headaches,
more anxiety - the whole thing.

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I kept plugging along
and still had very little positive result.

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So I thought, well, maybe I'll try
and get some feedback.

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I wore a heart rate monitor

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to gauge my physical response
to different techniques that I was trying.

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Kept plugging along

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and still was not having
the type of result that I had hoped for

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until I paired one of the most basic
breathing techniques

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alongside one of the most basic
mindfulness techniques.

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That's when it clicked.

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(Finger snap)

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That was the game changer.

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My heart rate began to drop consistently.

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My psychological responses
to stressors in the environment

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were significantly altered.

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Thus, "The 3x3 Method" was born.

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The 3x3 Method is extremely simple.

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All you're going to do

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is identify one physical object
in the environment,

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name it,

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and take one deep breath,

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and repeat it three times.

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Now, keep in mind, most everyone
that I've trained in this model

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looked at me like I was spouting nonsense

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until they tried it.

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So you're not alone
if you feel the same way,

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and don't worry, we're going to do it
together in just a minute, okay?

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Want to do it together?

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Audience: Yeah.

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All right.

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So I want you to find -

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think of and find three physical objects
in your environment.

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It can be anything:

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it can be your desk,
someone sitting next to you,

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your computer screen, a lamp.

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Literally anything.

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It's important not to fall
into a particular trap

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that I've seen many people fall in,

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and that is to add
subjective descriptors to the object,

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like that's my favorite stool

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or I really like Johnny.

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When we add these subjective
descriptors, adjectives, etcetera,

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it brings about subtle emotional reactions
that muddle the process.

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So you're simply going to say,

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"That's a stool."

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Nothing else.

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When you name the object,
you're going to do so in your mind,

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not out loud.

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If you do this at work
or on the bus or train,

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people might start to think, you know,

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you're having a little trouble that day.

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Okay?

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And when you take your breath,

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you're going to do so
through your nose or mouth,

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whatever is comfortable for you.

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Ultimately, it is best
if you choose the objects yourself,

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but for the sake of this talk
and for us to do it together

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and things to be expeditious,

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I've picked out three objects for us:

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this pointer, that stool, and this screen.

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Ready to give it a try together?

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All right, here we go.

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That's a pointer.

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Take a deep breath.

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(Inhales)

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(Exhales)

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That's a stool.

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Deep breath.

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(Inhales)

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(Exhales)

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That's a screen.

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Another deep breath.

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(Inhales)

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(Exhales)

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So, how do you feel?

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A little less stressed?

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A little more relaxed?

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It's good, right?

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And it's insanely simple.

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I even use it at night if I wake up,

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worried about the children
or work or whatever,

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and I can't get back to sleep.

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And you'd better believe

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that I was using it behind that curtain
before coming out here today.

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Okay?

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Backstage, I even did what I call a "9x9,"

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which is doing the process
three times in a row,

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and you can do that too
if you're ever in a tight spot

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or coming out to give a TEDx Talk.

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(Laughter)

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So when are you going to use
the 3x3 Method in your life?

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We all experience repeated stressors
in our daily lives

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that tax our ability
to stay present in the current moment,

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focus, and manage our stress.

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I want you to take a moment

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to think about one of these
repeated stressors that you experience.

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It shouldn't be too hard.

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Everyone have something?

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Okay.

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So let's make a promise to each other:

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the next time that we experience
one of these stressors,

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we'll use the 3x3 Method
to try and manage it.

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Deal?

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Audience: Yeah.

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Great.

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So, what is the future of the 3x3 Method?

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The people who are using the 3x3 Method
continue to inspire me

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in the myriad of situations
and occupations and life settings

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in which they're using it.

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I have an elite runner using it
during long races to keep stamina;

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a spine surgeon using it
during complex procedures to stay calm;

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even a CEO using it
right before making big decisions.

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Really, anyone can use it
in almost any setting -

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from parents to business people
to doctors to athletes.

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It doesn't matter.

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Finally,

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the 3x3 Method can be used

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to help us avoid

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the ever-growing, addictive nature

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of the impulse
to check our digital devices.

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(Laughter)

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The next time that you're in line

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at the store

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and you have that urge
to take your phone out

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and check social media,
send a text, read an email -

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don't.

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Use the 3x3 Method instead

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to bring yourself
back to the current moment.

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Every moment has meaning.

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Time is precious.

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Don't miss out.

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Thank you for sharing this moment with me.

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(Applause)