[ Music ]

[ Applause ]

>> Mindfulness.

Truly become quite the buzzword in recent times,

even though mindfulness practices
have been used for millennia.

Most of us are in agreement that
mindfulness practices are a positive thing

and would benefit our life.

There's an abundant amount of research
illustrating the positive effect

that mindfulness practices have on quality of
life, improved focus, and decreased stress.

From Fortune 500 companies
to elementary schools,

mindfulness practices are being used
every day in practical application

and controlled studies with wonderful outcomes.

Unfortunately, most of us tend
to pump the brakes when we think

about sequestering even a small amount of
time or quiet space to practice mindfulness.

You might think to yourself, a quiet space.

Ten minutes.

What? Forget it.

I don't have time.

We allow in the, out of survival and
the moment we allow screaming children,

occupational pressures, general life stress,

and technological distractions
to consume our precious minutes.

The result of brushing mindfulness
practices aside is more stress

and a decreased quality of life.

What if I told you that the benefits of
mindfulness could be obtained in as little

as 30 seconds in almost any setting?

You might think that I'm selling snake oil
or at a minimum, it's too good to be true.

The reality is it is true.

And is being done regularly by people that I've
trained in the method that I'm about to share

with you, ranging from elite
athletes to doctors to parents.

I first developed the technique
I call the Three by Three Method

when my daughter was about one year old.

For those of you with children, you know
that parenting brings about great joy but,

also, an incredible amount of stress.

I found myself in experiencing increased muscle
tension, headaches, and anxiety as I rushed

from home to work to home to the playground.

To home to bed to work to
home to the playground.

And on and on, the carousel went.

I became extremely uncomfortable.

And so, I set out to do something about it.

Now, as a psychotherapist working in the
high-pressure environment of the Silicon Valley,

I am inherently passionate
about mindfulness techniques.

Thought I had it in the bag.

I set out to give it a try.

Unfortunately, I fell right into the hurry,
hurry, hurry, I don't have time trap.

What'd that get me?

More stress, more headaches,
more anxiety, the whole thing.

I kept plugging along and still
had very little positive result.

So, I thought well, maybe I'll
try and get some feedback.

I started wearing a heart rate
monitor to gauge my physical response

to different techniques that I was trying.

Kept plugging along and still was not having
the type of result that I had hoped for.

Until I paired one of the most basic
breathing techniques alongside one

of the most basic mindfulness techniques.

That's when it clicked.

That was the gamechanger.

My heart rate began to drop consistently.

My psychological responses to stressors in
the environment were significantly altered.

Thus, the Three by Three Method was born.

The Three by Three Method is extremely simple.

All you're going to do is identify one
physical object in the environment, name it,

and take one deep breath,
and repeat it three times.

Now, keep in mind, most everyone that
I've trained in this model looked at me

like I was spouting nonsense
until they tried it.

So, you're not alone if you're
feeling that same way right now.

And don't worry, we're going to
do it together in just a minute.

Okay? Want to do it together?

>> [group speaking] Yeah.

>> All right.

So, I want you to find, think and find
three physical objects in your environment.

It can be anything.

It can be your desk.

Someone sitting next to you.

Your computer screen.

A lamp. Literally, anything.

It's important not to fall into a particular
trap that I've seen many people fall in,

and that is to add subjective
descriptors to the object.

Like, that's my favorite stool.

Or I really like Johnny.

When we add these subjective
descriptors, adjectives, etcetera,

it brings about subtle emotional
reactions that muddle the process.

So, you're simply going to say that's a stool.

Nothing else.

And when you name the object, you're
going to do so in your mind, not out loud.

If you're doing this at work or on the bus
or on the train, people might start to think,

you know, you're having a
little trouble that day.

Okay. And when you take your breath,
you're going to do so through your nose

or your mouth, whatever is comfortable for you.

Ultimately, it is best if you choose the
object yourself and for the sake of this talk

and for us to do it together,
things to be expeditious,

I've picked out three objects for us.

This pointer, that stool, and this screen.

Ready to give it a try together?

All right.

Here we go.

That's a pointer.

Take a deep breath [breathing].

That's a stool.

Deep breath [breathing].

That's a screen.

Another deep breath [breathing].

So, how do you feel?

A little less stressed?

More, a little more relaxed?

It's good.

Right. And it's insanely simple.

I even use it at night if I wake up
worried about the children or work

or whatever it is and I can't get back to sleep.

And you'd better believe
that I was using it behind

that curtain before coming
out here today [laughter].

I, backstage, I even did
what I call a Nine by Nine,

which is doing the whole
process three times in a row.

And you can do that, too, if
you're ever really in a tight spot

or coming out to give a TEDx talk.

So, when are you going to use the
Three by Three Method in your life?

We all experience repeated stressors in our
daily lives that tax our ability to stay present

in the current moment, focus,
and manage our stress.

I want you to take a moment to think about one
of these repeated stressors that you experience.

This shouldn't be too hard.

Everyone have something?

Okay. So, let's make a promise to each other.

The next time that we experience one
of these stressors, we'll use the Three

by Three Method to try and manage it.

Deal?

>> [group speaking] Yeah.

>> Great. So, what is the future
of the Three by Three Method?

The people who are using the Three by Three
Method continue to inspire me in the myriad

of situations and occupations and life
settings in which they're using it.

I have an elite runner using it
during long races to keep stamina.

A spine surgeon using it during
complex procedures to stay calm.

Even a CEO using it right
before making big decisions.

Really, anyone can use it in almost any setting.

From parents to business people to
doctors to athletes, it doesn't matter.

Finally, the Three by Three Method can be used

to help us avoid the ever-growing
addictive nature

of the impulse to check our digital devices.

The next time that you're in line at the store
and you have that urge to take your phone out

and check social media, send
a text, read an email.

Don't. Use the Three by Three Method instead,
to bring yourself back to the current moment.

Every moment has meaning.

Time is precious.

Don't miss out.

Thank you for sharing this moment with me.

[ Applause ]