WEBVTT

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♪ theme music ♪

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(Derek) Welcome to Hope Sabbath School,

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an in-depth, interactive study

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of the Word of God.

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We are coming toward the end

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of a series on <i>Ezra and Nehemiah,</i>

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that's the fifth century, B.C.,

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a Jewish priest and a Jewish exile

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who was a Persian court official.

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God used them to do

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some mighty work for Him,

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and there are principles

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that we will learn for our lives today.

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Today, <i>Dealing with Bad Decisions,</i>

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particularly related to marriage,

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but I'm praying that this

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would not be a negative study,

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but it would give positive instruction

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wherever you are on your journey with God.

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So, welcome to Hope Sabbath School.

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Good to be together again,

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and I'm excited about this topic

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because I feel like it's really relevant

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for our lives today.

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And wherever we are in our journey,

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the Word of God is a lamp
to our feet, right?

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We're glad you're part

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of our Hope Sabbath School family
wherever you are,

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always happy to hear from you.

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Here's a note from Morgan in Mississippi

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in the United States of America.

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Morgan says, "I'm writing

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because it's long overdue.

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I discovered Hope Channel

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for the first time on DirecTV 368

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in January of 2018.

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I must admit I'm learning

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more about the Bible than ever before."

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(Team) Amen.

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(Derek) "I love the interactive
and teaching approach

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that you present to all listeners.

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It's been a joy and a blessing

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since I started watching

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Hope Sabbath School.

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I live in the U.S. in Mississippi.

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I grew up attending

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a local Baptist church, sometimes;

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however, my family never

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honored the Sabbath day

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nor were we active, serious followers
of Jesus.

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As I became older, I began

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to seek Jesus for myself."

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(Team) Amen.

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(Derek) "And I have not been disappointed.

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So I'm still seeking Him everyday.

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And when I became aware of Hope Channel,

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it was a blessing to me,

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especially Hope Sabbath School."

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Well, Morgan, we're just glad you're part

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of our Hope Sabbath School family, right?

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And we're excited that God is leading you

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into a fuller understanding of His truth

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and His plan for your life.

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Here's a note from Joe in Zambia,

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"I greet you in the name

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of the Lord Jesus."

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That wasn't too encouraging.

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Greet him in the name
of the Lord Jesus!

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"My name's Joseph from Lusaka.

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I want to thank you

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for Hope Sabbath School

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and the work you're doing.

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Keep up the good work.

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It keeps me glued to the TV

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to know more about the Kingdom of Heaven."

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(Team) Amen.

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(Derek) "The explanations are distinct

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and clear for all to understand.

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May God keep blessing you

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abundantly with wisdom

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and spread the Word everywhere. Amen."

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(Team) Amen.

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(Derek) I want to meet Joe;

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He's an enthusiastic fellow.

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Banks writes from Canada;
Any Canadians here?

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Yes, Adison, a Canadian.

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He's on the other side
in Gatineau, Canada.

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(Adison) Quebec?

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(Derek) Quebec, Banks St. Fleur,

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"I'm speaking to you in Gatineau.

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I have a great privilege

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to find you and your group

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in that marvelous work,

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an interactive study of the Word of God.

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What a beautiful thing to serve Jesus!"

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(Team) Amen.

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(Derek) "I am praying that Jesus

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can help us to stay close to Him,

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even with what's happening

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around us in the world. Blessings. Amen."

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(Team) Amen.

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(Derek) I think that may have been

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second language, French-speaking Quebec?

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(Adison) Oui.

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(Derek) We're glad, Banks,

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that you could write to us and that you're

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part of our Hope Sabbath School family.

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Here's a note from a donor,

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"I'm enjoying the lessons

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on Hope Sabbath School,

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learning and understanding more.

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You bring things to light

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and make it easier

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to understand the Bible."

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(Team) Amen.

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(Derek) "Thank you for all the work

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that you do to bring the program

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to so many around the world.

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I watch Hope Sabbath School

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three times every week,"

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and a gift of 35 dollars

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to help the ministry.

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You know, all of us working together

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is what makes the miracle happen,
isn't it?

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Thanks so much to our donors

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for your prayers and your support.

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One last note, from Marita in New Zealand,

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way on the other side of the world.

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"I would like to thank you

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for your discussions,

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which sometimes make me laugh

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and other times make me cry; that's life.

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The team, with many different members

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from all over the world,

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working together for the whole family,

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what a great blessing you are.

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I would like to give

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special thanks to Bodil.

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She works behind the scenes,

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always in the background, but very present

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through her Scripture songs."

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(Team) Amen.

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(Derek) "To put music to the Bible
is great.

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I'm singing often during the day

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the songs I learn on Hope Sabbath School."

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(Team) Amen.

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(Derek) "How easy to remember the Bible

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when you put it to music - fantastic!

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I look forward to singing

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with all the saints

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when we are in Heaven."

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Well, Marita, we need you

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to sing with us right now.

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We have a 3,000-year-old Scripture song

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my wife, Bodil, put a new tune to,

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and it says, "To You, O Lord,

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I lift up my soul.

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O my God, I trust in You."

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Let's sing it together.

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♪ music ♪

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(Derek) I was just thinking
while we were singing,

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maybe we'll be in a difficult situation
somewhere,

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and instead of going, "Oh! Oh!"

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we'll just start singing,

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"To You, O Lord...," and the people

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will be like, "Oh!"

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God may send an angel

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on either side of us.

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God is able to care for His children,
isn't He?

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And one of the things

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that we're learning,

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whatever we're facing in life,

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is to call upon the name of the Lord.

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Today, <i>Dealing with Bad Decisions,</i>

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what better thing to do

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than call on the name of the Lord.

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So let's pray together right now.

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To You, O Lord, we lift up our souls.

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We want to thank You,

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that You, through Your prophets

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and most of all through Your Son, Jesus,

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have taught us the way to live

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and the way of salvation.

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And most of all, You've revealed to us
that You love us

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with an immeasurable and unfailing love.

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And I pray, as we look

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at <i>Dealing with Bad Decisions,</i>

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that You would give, not only counsel

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to redirect our path in a healthy way,

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but an awareness of how much

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You love us on our journey;
and I thank You.

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In the name of Jesus. Amen.

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(Team) Amen.

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(Derek) Well, I'm sure

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there were many bad decisions

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that were being made

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in the time of Ezra and Nehemiah,

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just like there are today,

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but both Ezra and Nehemiah

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focus on one bad decision

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that had broad consequences.

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And we're going to start

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with Nehemiah's account

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in Nehemiah, chapter 13, verses 23 and 24.

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And, Stephanie, would you begin our study,

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verses 23 and 24 of Nehemiah 13.

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(Stephanie) I'll be reading

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from the King James Version:

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(Derek) So, a problem here

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is that there is what?

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(Nicole) Intermarriage.

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(Derek) Intermarriage with...?

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(Team) Nonbelievers.

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(Derek) Not just people of other nations,

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but people who worship false gods;

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that's the real challenge.

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And, Adison, look down

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in that same chapter for us, in verse 28.

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I wouldn't say, "to make matters worse,"

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but to compound the problem,

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what does Nehemiah tell us

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in verse 28 of chapter 13?

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(Adison) I'm reading

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from the King James Version:

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(Derek) Now, you remember

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this fellow Sanballat the Horonite.

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Summarize his character in a short phrase.

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What would you say?

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(Travis) Troublemaker.

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(Derek) Troublemaker and...?

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(Jason) Enemy.

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(Derek) Enemy of God!

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Opposer of the things of God.

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And apparently his relative

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married a relative of the high priest.

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So, it's all the way up

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to the top leadership in the community,

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this problem of intermarriage.

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Let's see how Nehemiah responds, Gary,

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if you'd take us, in the same chapter,
verse 25.

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And I know these are startling words,

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but what does Nehemiah do?

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(Gary) Okay, I'll be reading

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from the New King James Version:

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(Derek) Now, before we do an evaluation

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of whether you think it was a good thing

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to curse them, strike some of them,

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pull out their hair,

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what illustration does he give

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of the detrimental effect

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of marrying - taking spouses -

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who worship pagan gods?

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Well, let's look and see.

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Travis, would you read,

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same chapter for us,

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Nehemiah 13, verses 26 and 27.

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(Travis) I'll be reading

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from the New King James Version:

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(Derek) So did God love Solomon?

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(Team) Yes.

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(Derek) Did marrying pagan spouses
impact his life?

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(Team) Yes.

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(Derek) Absolutely.

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Devastating consequences, right?

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Not just setting a poor example,

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but building pagan temples

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and even, doesn't Scripture say,

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drawing his heart away.

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And wasn't that a sin?

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He says it was a sin, right, to do that.

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Why? Because they...?

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They knew better; they knew

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what God had asked them to do.

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But I've got to stop and ask,

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how does what Nehemiah did,

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how does that reflect

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the teaching of Jesus?

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In Matthew 5:43-45, that's where it says,

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"Love your enemies, bless those
who curse you,

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do good to those who spitefully use you
and persecute you."

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And isn't there somewhere else

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in the Sermon on the Mount

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where it says, "Treat others..."?

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(Adison) The Golden Rule.

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(Derek) The Golden Rule, right,
Matthew 7:12,

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the way you would like to be treated.

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So, what do you think, Jonathan?

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I mean, it's fairly intense,
wouldn't you say?

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He struck some; he cursed them.

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I'm sure that doesn't mean

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he used foul language,

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but he said, I guess, what,

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"The curse of God be upon you,"

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or hit them, he pulled some of the hair

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out of their beards?

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(Jonathan) I guess, reading it,

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it does seem like maybe he's

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not acting out of cautious principle,

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maybe a little bit out of emotion.

00:14:00.907 --> 00:14:03.582
But at the same time, I wonder, okay,

00:14:03.582 --> 00:14:05.780
when you have a child or some place

00:14:05.780 --> 00:14:07.871
where you need to set down
strong discipline,

00:14:07.871 --> 00:14:09.111
there certainly is a time

00:14:09.111 --> 00:14:11.045
for maybe doing things

00:14:11.045 --> 00:14:12.676
that one might say, "Well,

00:14:12.676 --> 00:14:14.152
was that loving your neighbor?"

00:14:14.152 --> 00:14:17.195
Well, if you look in the largest sense
of what it was,

00:14:17.195 --> 00:14:19.142
destroying these people's lives

00:14:19.142 --> 00:14:20.748
and the whole community's lives,

00:14:20.748 --> 00:14:22.243
maybe it's a different angle

00:14:22.243 --> 00:14:24.177
on how you evaluate that.

00:14:24.177 --> 00:14:27.066
(Derek) All right, you might say,

00:14:27.066 --> 00:14:30.015
if you saw me heading

00:14:30.015 --> 00:14:32.690
down a destructive path,

00:14:32.690 --> 00:14:35.055
and you really cared about me,

00:14:35.055 --> 00:14:39.687
you might do whatever it takes
to wake me up -

00:14:39.687 --> 00:14:41.713
Malaina, what do you think?

00:14:41.713 --> 00:14:44.525
(Malaina) I think that sometimes

00:14:44.525 --> 00:14:45.746
you need to come at it

00:14:45.746 --> 00:14:47.753
with love and care,

00:14:47.753 --> 00:14:49.382
but if that approach doesn't work,

00:14:49.382 --> 00:14:50.551
and sometimes it doesn't

00:14:50.551 --> 00:14:51.722
always work on people,

00:14:51.722 --> 00:14:53.680
you kind of need to hold them accountable

00:14:53.680 --> 00:14:55.673
and be like, "What you're doing is wrong,

00:14:55.673 --> 00:14:56.793
and it's going to lead

00:14:56.793 --> 00:14:58.134
to even worse consequences."

00:14:58.134 --> 00:14:59.689
And I think that's what Nehemiah

00:14:59.689 --> 00:15:00.889
was trying to get at.

00:15:00.889 --> 00:15:02.577
And maybe it was a little intense,

00:15:02.577 --> 00:15:07.058
but he was really hurt by that, so...

00:15:07.058 --> 00:15:08.775
(Derek) We always need to be careful

00:15:08.775 --> 00:15:10.014
that we don't judge people

00:15:10.014 --> 00:15:11.019
because we don't know

00:15:11.019 --> 00:15:13.215
all the details, right?

00:15:13.215 --> 00:15:14.668
You know, he might have said,

00:15:14.668 --> 00:15:16.181
"I told you last week,"

00:15:16.181 --> 00:15:17.561
or, "I told you a month ago,

00:15:17.561 --> 00:15:18.453
and you just took

00:15:18.453 --> 00:15:20.369
three pagan wives," or whatever.

00:15:20.369 --> 00:15:22.362
So, we don't know all the details,

00:15:22.362 --> 00:15:24.237
but we would all agree

00:15:24.237 --> 00:15:26.653
that he cares about what's happening

00:15:26.653 --> 00:15:28.683
and the negative consequence. Stephanie?

00:15:28.683 --> 00:15:30.701
(Stephanie) Right, and I guess I would say

00:15:30.701 --> 00:15:32.076
we would want to use caution

00:15:32.076 --> 00:15:35.395
not to use this as an excuse for abuse

00:15:35.395 --> 00:15:39.006
in a relationship or anything
of that nature, your child...

00:15:39.006 --> 00:15:40.146
(Derek) Yeah, there is

00:15:40.146 --> 00:15:42.290
such a thing, isn't there...

00:15:42.290 --> 00:15:43.255
What do they call it

00:15:43.255 --> 00:15:45.957
when a spiritual leader abuses...

00:15:45.957 --> 00:15:47.510
(Thomas) It's an abuse of power.

00:15:47.510 --> 00:15:49.612
(Derek) An abuse of power, that's right,

00:15:49.612 --> 00:15:52.339
whether that's abusing people physically

00:15:52.339 --> 00:15:54.485
or sexually or psychologically

00:15:54.485 --> 00:15:57.678
or, I guess, in a religious way, right?

00:15:57.678 --> 00:16:00.590
So you're saying, "Well, he hit people,

00:16:00.590 --> 00:16:02.414
and he pulled their hair out,

00:16:02.414 --> 00:16:04.289
and it's in the Bible,

00:16:04.289 --> 00:16:05.960
so I can do that to people, too."

00:16:05.960 --> 00:16:08.298
You would not see that as an example,

00:16:08.298 --> 00:16:11.690
but what I hear Malaina saying is,

00:16:11.690 --> 00:16:13.645
feeling intense about this

00:16:13.645 --> 00:16:18.011
and doing what it will take to stop them,

00:16:18.011 --> 00:16:20.923
we maybe need to contextualize that
into our culture?

00:16:20.923 --> 00:16:22.758
What do you think, Travis?

00:16:22.758 --> 00:16:25.946
(Travis) First off, if I was a leader
in a church or something,

00:16:25.946 --> 00:16:29.404
I would never pull someone's hair out
and beat them; I just wouldn't.

00:16:29.404 --> 00:16:31.403
I would have to take a different approach.

00:16:31.403 --> 00:16:33.236
(Derek) Even if you felt very intense?

00:16:33.236 --> 00:16:34.437
(Travis) I just wouldn't.

00:16:34.437 --> 00:16:36.444
But we don't know the culture,
as you said.

00:16:36.444 --> 00:16:37.983
But then I think about the verse

00:16:37.983 --> 00:16:39.465
in the Bible where Jesus says,

00:16:39.465 --> 00:16:41.433
"To those I love, I rebuke and chasten."

00:16:41.433 --> 00:16:43.242
Nehemiah had a passionate love,

00:16:43.242 --> 00:16:45.308
and he knew the consequences of this

00:16:45.308 --> 00:16:47.658
would be the <i>death</i> of people.

00:16:47.658 --> 00:16:51.054
So, pulling some hair out, you know,

00:16:51.054 --> 00:16:53.028
doing something like that might be better

00:16:53.028 --> 00:16:55.519
than them dying later on, too,
so I don't know.

00:16:55.519 --> 00:16:56.587
(Derek) Maybe he said,

00:16:56.587 --> 00:17:00.239
"I love you, brother" (yank).

00:17:00.239 --> 00:17:01.638
One thing's clear; go back

00:17:01.638 --> 00:17:03.733
to Deuteronomy, chapter 7;

00:17:03.733 --> 00:17:06.983
they knew what God had asked them to do.

00:17:06.983 --> 00:17:10.053
Deuteronomy, chapter 7,

00:17:10.053 --> 00:17:11.937
Heide, if you have that, and you'd read

00:17:11.937 --> 00:17:14.212
the first three verses for us

00:17:14.212 --> 00:17:17.072
of Deuteronomy, chapter 7.

00:17:17.072 --> 00:17:19.952
It had been clearly told to them

00:17:19.952 --> 00:17:22.503
that God didn't want them

00:17:22.503 --> 00:17:25.070
to do these things.

00:17:25.070 --> 00:17:26.755
(Heide) All right, I'll be reading

00:17:26.755 --> 00:17:28.925
from the New King James Version,
and it says:

00:18:05.471 --> 00:18:07.691
(Derek) Very clear instruction

00:18:07.691 --> 00:18:09.340
that God had given,

00:18:09.340 --> 00:18:11.055
and they're disregarding that.

00:18:11.055 --> 00:18:12.011
Now, before we go on

00:18:12.011 --> 00:18:13.784
and see what's happening in Ezra

00:18:13.784 --> 00:18:15.344
and what <i>he</i> shares,

00:18:15.344 --> 00:18:16.576
let's broaden it out,

00:18:16.576 --> 00:18:18.561
dealing with bad decisions.

00:18:18.561 --> 00:18:20.675
Let's go beyond just taking

00:18:20.675 --> 00:18:22.475
an unbelieving spouse,

00:18:22.475 --> 00:18:24.237
and let's say they knew

00:18:24.237 --> 00:18:26.412
what God taught, Nicole,

00:18:26.412 --> 00:18:29.360
but they did something
completely opposite.

00:18:29.360 --> 00:18:32.458
That could happen in many areas of life.

00:18:32.458 --> 00:18:33.754
Why do people do that?

00:18:33.754 --> 00:18:34.821
Now, we're not talking

00:18:34.821 --> 00:18:36.821
about the people that don't know.

00:18:36.821 --> 00:18:38.557
We're talking about the people

00:18:38.557 --> 00:18:41.655
that know what God's asking them to do,

00:18:41.655 --> 00:18:44.672
and they do the exact opposite.

00:18:44.672 --> 00:18:46.173
Why do they do that?

00:18:46.173 --> 00:18:48.930
Or maybe I should say, why do <i>we</i>
do that sometimes?

00:18:48.930 --> 00:18:51.269
(Nicole) I think part of it
is self-gratification.

00:18:51.269 --> 00:18:52.610
We believe that we know best

00:18:52.610 --> 00:18:54.400
what is good for us and what we like,

00:18:54.400 --> 00:18:56.434
and so, therefore, we engage in activities

00:18:56.434 --> 00:18:58.070
that God tells us not to engage in

00:18:58.070 --> 00:19:01.988
because it gives us gratification
of what we want right now

00:19:01.988 --> 00:19:04.858
because we're in a very "microwave,"
we call it, society.

00:19:04.858 --> 00:19:06.369
And so, rather than wait on God

00:19:06.369 --> 00:19:08.994
to give us the great blessings
He has in store for us,

00:19:08.994 --> 00:19:11.134
we want to gratify ourselves today.

00:19:11.134 --> 00:19:13.132
(Derek) So, "God, I know
you've given this,

00:19:13.132 --> 00:19:15.770
but actually I know better
in this situation"?

00:19:15.770 --> 00:19:20.338
And the angels go, "Oh, no!" right? Gary?

00:19:20.338 --> 00:19:21.522
(Gary) Just to piggyback

00:19:21.522 --> 00:19:22.756
off of what Nicole said,

00:19:22.756 --> 00:19:24.022
it's a lack of faith

00:19:24.022 --> 00:19:25.739
and a lack of trust in God's words.

00:19:25.739 --> 00:19:31.176
I mean, we can't see beyond what we see,

00:19:31.176 --> 00:19:33.520
and because of that,

00:19:33.520 --> 00:19:35.842
and God can see the future,

00:19:35.842 --> 00:19:37.799
He's saying, "Look, you can't see it yet,

00:19:37.799 --> 00:19:39.524
but this is going to be really bad.

00:19:39.524 --> 00:19:40.768
Just don't entertain it."

00:19:40.768 --> 00:19:42.860
And we are just captivated by what we see.

00:19:42.860 --> 00:19:44.413
(Derek) And what we've learned

00:19:44.413 --> 00:19:46.389
from our whole discussion

00:19:46.389 --> 00:19:50.443
is God's direction in our lives
is motivated by...?

00:19:50.443 --> 00:19:51.550
(Team) Love.

00:19:51.550 --> 00:19:52.912
(Derek) He loves us, right?

00:19:52.912 --> 00:19:54.116
He's like, "That is going

00:19:54.116 --> 00:19:56.283
to be destructive." Jonathan?

00:19:56.283 --> 00:19:57.612
(Jonathan) To his point,

00:19:57.612 --> 00:19:59.482
it's hard when you see things

00:19:59.482 --> 00:20:02.663
It's like, "Okay, this makes sense to me."

00:20:02.663 --> 00:20:04.326
It's very hard to go

00:20:04.326 --> 00:20:06.119
based on the small little thing

00:20:06.119 --> 00:20:08.335
you can barely see of, "Okay,

00:20:08.335 --> 00:20:09.944
God is faithful; He knows,"

00:20:09.944 --> 00:20:11.166
and you have to go,

00:20:11.166 --> 00:20:14.606
based on things you cannot see,
which takes faith.

00:20:14.606 --> 00:20:16.592
(Derek) There is a text in the Proverbs

00:20:16.592 --> 00:20:20.928
that says, "There is a way
that seems right."

00:20:20.928 --> 00:20:22.468
I didn't really understand this

00:20:22.468 --> 00:20:23.505
when I was little.

00:20:23.505 --> 00:20:27.037
Now I understand, it actually looks right,

00:20:27.037 --> 00:20:31.564
"But the end thereof is the way of death."

00:20:31.564 --> 00:20:34.440
We don't see that, and so, sometimes

00:20:34.440 --> 00:20:38.162
we may do something directly contrary.
Travis?

00:20:38.162 --> 00:20:39.754
(Travis) I think, too, it's good

00:20:39.754 --> 00:20:41.017
to remember that we're not

00:20:41.017 --> 00:20:42.086
in the Garden of Eden;

00:20:42.086 --> 00:20:44.253
Satan isn't limited to a tree;
he's all over.

00:20:44.253 --> 00:20:45.960
He's got shiny pearls everywhere.

00:20:45.960 --> 00:20:48.091
And so, as we're walking,

00:20:48.091 --> 00:20:49.528
you'd said earlier, the Bible

00:20:49.528 --> 00:20:51.004
is a lamp and a light.

00:20:51.004 --> 00:20:52.597
"Lord, is this okay?" and we need

00:20:52.597 --> 00:20:55.861
to be in constant communion,
"Is this decision okay?"

00:20:55.861 --> 00:20:57.206
"Is <i>this</i> decision okay?"

00:20:57.206 --> 00:20:59.100
As soon as we get away from that,

00:20:59.100 --> 00:21:01.454
we start trusting in ourselves,
as Nicole said.

00:21:01.454 --> 00:21:03.638
And then we're challenged

00:21:03.638 --> 00:21:06.749
with the decisions we made,
or the consequences

00:21:06.749 --> 00:21:08.705
of our own decisions without God.

00:21:08.705 --> 00:21:10.226
(Derek) And certainly the Bible

00:21:10.226 --> 00:21:11.825
has some great principles for us.

00:21:11.825 --> 00:21:13.865
How does a community -

00:21:13.865 --> 00:21:15.889
Church is a community of loving people -

00:21:15.889 --> 00:21:19.203
how does that help us, Chris,

00:21:19.203 --> 00:21:21.808
can I say, to protect us from things

00:21:21.808 --> 00:21:24.448
we may not see immediately?

00:21:24.448 --> 00:21:25.688
(Chris) There are so many

00:21:25.688 --> 00:21:27.653
different types of people in a community.

00:21:27.653 --> 00:21:29.582
There are people that are older than us,

00:21:29.582 --> 00:21:31.778
people that are wiser than us,
people that have

00:21:31.778 --> 00:21:33.454
been through different experiences,

00:21:33.454 --> 00:21:35.975
people that have made the mistakes
that we might make.

00:21:35.975 --> 00:21:37.756
And because of that, they can lead us

00:21:37.756 --> 00:21:39.239
and guide us and show us, "Hey,

00:21:39.239 --> 00:21:40.459
I've been down that road.

00:21:40.459 --> 00:21:41.718
I understand how you feel,

00:21:41.718 --> 00:21:43.487
but just realize that your feelings

00:21:43.487 --> 00:21:45.235
are going to lead you to this place,

00:21:45.235 --> 00:21:47.192
and you don't want to be here."

00:21:47.192 --> 00:21:50.175
(Derek) So God may use people, too,

00:21:50.175 --> 00:21:52.213
in order to guide us. Evelyn?

00:21:52.213 --> 00:21:53.684
(Evelyn) These communities

00:21:53.684 --> 00:21:56.264
allow individuals to find mentors.

00:21:56.264 --> 00:21:59.743
Everyone needs a mentor in their life.

00:21:59.743 --> 00:22:01.432
And so, churches, families,

00:22:01.432 --> 00:22:03.279
they should all be accountable

00:22:03.279 --> 00:22:04.597
for each other in this way.

00:22:04.597 --> 00:22:05.990
Mentors are really the people

00:22:05.990 --> 00:22:07.893
you should turn to and say, "Hey, I have

00:22:07.893 --> 00:22:09.837
this in front of me; what should I do?"

00:22:09.837 --> 00:22:12.067
(Derek) Probably finding a mentor

00:22:12.067 --> 00:22:13.658
in a Bible study group

00:22:13.658 --> 00:22:15.029
or worshiping community

00:22:15.029 --> 00:22:19.405
rather than a bar or a club of some kind,

00:22:19.405 --> 00:22:21.315
you know, because you're finding someone

00:22:21.315 --> 00:22:23.091
who is at least seeking

00:22:23.091 --> 00:22:27.283
the way of God, the Word of God.

00:22:27.283 --> 00:22:29.435
We looked at Ezra;

00:22:29.435 --> 00:22:31.338
excuse me, we looked at Nehemiah, right?

00:22:31.338 --> 00:22:32.870
Now we're going to look at Ezra.

00:22:32.870 --> 00:22:34.099
And, by the way, they're

00:22:34.099 --> 00:22:35.792
not that far apart in years, right?

00:22:35.792 --> 00:22:37.278
They're kind of contemporaries.

00:22:37.278 --> 00:22:38.976
In fact, remember at the beginning

00:22:38.976 --> 00:22:41.645
of our study we shared that in Judaism

00:22:41.645 --> 00:22:44.382
Ezra and Nehemiah, they're together.

00:22:44.382 --> 00:22:45.615
Ezra and Nehemiah, right,

00:22:45.615 --> 00:22:46.638
and in the Septuagint

00:22:46.638 --> 00:22:48.187
they put them together

00:22:48.187 --> 00:22:50.412
because they're that same time period,

00:22:50.412 --> 00:22:52.813
the second wave, if you will,
of exiles coming.

00:22:52.813 --> 00:22:56.020
Let's go to Ezra, chapter 9,

00:22:56.020 --> 00:22:59.294
verses 1 and 2, and let's see

00:22:59.294 --> 00:23:03.469
a problem reported to the priest Ezra.

00:23:03.469 --> 00:23:05.387
Evelyn, if you have that, would you read

00:23:05.387 --> 00:23:07.703
the first two verses of chapter 9 of Ezra?

00:23:07.703 --> 00:23:10.447
(Evelyn) Yes, I'll be reading

00:23:10.447 --> 00:23:12.637
from the New Living Translation:

00:23:59.026 --> 00:24:00.266
(Derek) So, did you notice

00:24:00.266 --> 00:24:01.605
there's not just one example

00:24:01.605 --> 00:24:02.801
of this fellow's grandson

00:24:02.801 --> 00:24:04.467
who married this son-in-law,

00:24:04.467 --> 00:24:06.283
but it names specifically what...?

00:24:06.283 --> 00:24:08.099
(Team Member) The leaders.

00:24:08.099 --> 00:24:09.384
(Derek) Yeah, didn't it say

00:24:09.384 --> 00:24:12.147
priests and Levites were part of those...?

00:24:12.147 --> 00:24:13.467
Not all of them, obviously,

00:24:13.467 --> 00:24:15.995
but some of them were also offending.

00:24:15.995 --> 00:24:18.395
Now, let's see...and, Malaina,

00:24:18.395 --> 00:24:19.547
maybe you could read on

00:24:19.547 --> 00:24:22.831
in chapter 9, verses 3 and 4...

00:24:22.831 --> 00:24:26.535
Let's see how Ezra responds -

00:24:26.535 --> 00:24:28.795
you know what I'm going
to say, don't you? -

00:24:28.795 --> 00:24:31.273
how Ezra responds compared

00:24:31.273 --> 00:24:32.891
to how Nehemiah responded

00:24:32.891 --> 00:24:34.043
because it was serious

00:24:34.043 --> 00:24:37.401
in both settings, wasn't it?

00:24:37.401 --> 00:24:40.509
And maybe there's no right
or wrong response

00:24:40.509 --> 00:24:43.221
except to feel passionate

00:24:43.221 --> 00:24:46.490
about following God, right?

00:24:46.490 --> 00:24:48.797
Malaina, let's look at verses 3 and 4.

00:24:48.797 --> 00:24:50.111
(Malaina) I'll be reading

00:24:50.111 --> 00:24:51.753
from the New King James Version:

00:25:12.264 --> 00:25:13.184
(Derek) Jonathan?

00:25:13.184 --> 00:25:14.565
(Jonathan) It just does seem

00:25:14.565 --> 00:25:16.366
that his approach does more

00:25:16.366 --> 00:25:20.519
to appeal, maybe, to a motivation

00:25:20.519 --> 00:25:22.659
of those, like, all those

00:25:22.659 --> 00:25:24.585
that felt the same gathered around him.

00:25:24.585 --> 00:25:27.141
Like, maybe it had more of an ability

00:25:27.141 --> 00:25:32.520
to draw out their conviction
in a better way?

00:25:32.520 --> 00:25:34.574
(Derek) Jason, what do you think?

00:25:34.574 --> 00:25:36.474
You saw a difference, obviously, right?

00:25:36.474 --> 00:25:38.473
(Jason) Yes, there's this self-reflection.

00:25:38.473 --> 00:25:40.881
So, instead of immediately going out
and attacking,

00:25:40.881 --> 00:25:42.454
he kind of looks at, "Okay, God,

00:25:42.454 --> 00:25:43.831
what's gone on here?

00:25:43.831 --> 00:25:45.049
What is the situation,

00:25:45.049 --> 00:25:46.571
and how can I respond?"

00:25:46.571 --> 00:25:49.114
Kind of, he has this communication

00:25:49.114 --> 00:25:50.739
almost, you could say, with God

00:25:50.739 --> 00:25:51.949
in spending this time.

00:25:51.949 --> 00:25:53.850
(Derek) Uh-huh. Anybody else?

00:25:53.850 --> 00:25:56.093
If not, let's go to chapter 10.

00:25:56.093 --> 00:25:58.100
Stephanie, I know you're processing that.

00:25:58.100 --> 00:26:00.461
You have to say probably there was

00:26:00.461 --> 00:26:03.386
no textbook saying, "This is
how to respond."

00:26:03.386 --> 00:26:06.173
Different personalities, but both

00:26:06.173 --> 00:26:09.106
very passionate, like, "This isn't right."

00:26:09.106 --> 00:26:10.557
God said, "Don't do this,"

00:26:10.557 --> 00:26:12.515
and all the way up to priests and Levites

00:26:12.515 --> 00:26:14.531
are doing it, right?

00:26:14.531 --> 00:26:18.737
Chapter 10, verses 5 and 6,

00:26:18.737 --> 00:26:19.884
Nicole, do you have...?

00:26:19.884 --> 00:26:21.451
We're in Ezra still,

00:26:21.451 --> 00:26:23.652
chapter 10, verses 5 and 6.

00:26:23.652 --> 00:26:27.213
Let's see how he continues to respond.

00:26:27.213 --> 00:26:28.902
(Nicole) The New Living Translation

00:26:28.902 --> 00:26:30.832
of Ezra 10, verses 5 and 6 says:

00:27:01.343 --> 00:27:02.676
(Derek) When you hear

00:27:02.676 --> 00:27:04.887
that "ate and drank nothing,"

00:27:04.887 --> 00:27:06.112
what comes to mind?

00:27:06.112 --> 00:27:07.469
(Team) Fasting.

00:27:07.469 --> 00:27:11.119
(Derek) Fasting and...? And prayer, yeah.

00:27:11.119 --> 00:27:13.077
I think, Jason, you kind of described it.

00:27:13.077 --> 00:27:15.017
It's very much...He's trying

00:27:15.017 --> 00:27:18.952
to deal with this with God.

00:27:18.952 --> 00:27:21.960
He's fasting and praying
over this situation.

00:27:21.960 --> 00:27:23.375
(Jonathan) It makes me think

00:27:23.375 --> 00:27:24.794
of Gandhi in some sense,

00:27:24.794 --> 00:27:26.926
not a direct correlation,

00:27:26.926 --> 00:27:29.959
but Gandhi went for a long time

00:27:29.959 --> 00:27:31.162
without food and water

00:27:31.162 --> 00:27:32.660
in a sense trying to appeal

00:27:32.660 --> 00:27:34.414
to people's conscience.

00:27:34.414 --> 00:27:36.231
And so, maybe in a somewhat similar...

00:27:36.231 --> 00:27:37.676
(Derek) Sure, you're thinking

00:27:37.676 --> 00:27:39.297
in the 20th century a leader that,

00:27:39.297 --> 00:27:42.530
instead of using aggression, he uh...

00:27:42.530 --> 00:27:44.449
(Jonathan) Appealed to their conscience.

00:27:44.449 --> 00:27:45.819
(Derek) He appealed to them

00:27:45.819 --> 00:27:47.401
by how much he was grieving

00:27:47.401 --> 00:27:50.054
over the abuse that he saw.

00:27:50.054 --> 00:27:51.964
Certainly other places in Scripture

00:27:51.964 --> 00:27:54.131
where people ate and drank nothing

00:27:54.131 --> 00:27:56.710
in connection with seeking God,

00:27:56.710 --> 00:27:58.863
help me, some other stories, Gary?

00:27:58.863 --> 00:28:01.435
(Gary) The Ninevites after Jonah came.

00:28:01.435 --> 00:28:03.484
(Derek) That's right, after Jonah says,

00:28:03.484 --> 00:28:05.178
"God's going to destroy this city,"

00:28:05.178 --> 00:28:07.228
they repented with fasting. Yes?

00:28:07.228 --> 00:28:08.905
(Team Member) Saul/Paul.

00:28:08.905 --> 00:28:10.902
(Derek) Saul, for three days

00:28:10.902 --> 00:28:13.095
after he encounters the risen Christ.

00:28:13.095 --> 00:28:15.562
And a contemporary of Ezra and Nehemiah,

00:28:15.562 --> 00:28:17.775
namely Queen Esther

00:28:17.775 --> 00:28:19.408
who asked all of the people,

00:28:19.408 --> 00:28:21.274
including her uncle Mordecai,

00:28:21.274 --> 00:28:24.537
to eat and drink nothing for three days,

00:28:24.537 --> 00:28:25.908
to fast and to pray.

00:28:25.908 --> 00:28:27.455
So I don't think it's reading

00:28:27.455 --> 00:28:28.584
too much into the text

00:28:28.584 --> 00:28:33.052
to say that he wasn't just going
on a health diet,

00:28:33.052 --> 00:28:34.706
but this was really fasting

00:28:34.706 --> 00:28:37.173
and praying and seeking God.

00:28:37.173 --> 00:28:40.942
So here he is, dealing

00:28:40.942 --> 00:28:42.586
with a difficult situation.

00:28:42.586 --> 00:28:43.901
At this point, I guess he's

00:28:43.901 --> 00:28:47.354
done something external, what's he done?

00:28:47.354 --> 00:28:48.232
What did you read?

00:28:48.232 --> 00:28:49.762
(Team Member) Pull on his beard?

00:28:49.762 --> 00:28:51.185
(Derek) No...He's done

00:28:51.185 --> 00:28:53.284
some things internally, introspectively...

00:28:53.284 --> 00:28:55.285
(Nicole) He told the Israelites
to swear...

00:28:55.285 --> 00:28:56.548
(Derek) He did; he called

00:28:56.548 --> 00:28:57.677
the leaders, didn't he?

00:28:57.677 --> 00:28:58.890
We read that; the leaders

00:28:58.890 --> 00:29:00.251
of the priests and Levites,

00:29:00.251 --> 00:29:02.716
verse 5 of Ezra 10.

00:29:02.716 --> 00:29:04.589
But very much, and I think

00:29:04.589 --> 00:29:07.219
we see this with Nehemiah, too,

00:29:07.219 --> 00:29:09.816
bathing this whole thing in prayer, right?

00:29:09.816 --> 00:29:11.282
Why is that important?

00:29:11.282 --> 00:29:12.949
We're talking about trying

00:29:12.949 --> 00:29:19.432
to resolve a bad situation.

00:29:19.432 --> 00:29:22.475
Why is prayer so important, Evelyn,

00:29:22.475 --> 00:29:23.573
when you find yourself

00:29:23.573 --> 00:29:25.181
in a situation like that?

00:29:25.181 --> 00:29:26.361
(Evelyn) Because we know

00:29:26.361 --> 00:29:29.189
that God is the One who stores wisdom,

00:29:29.189 --> 00:29:31.131
and we need to be on our knees

00:29:31.131 --> 00:29:32.387
and ask Him, "God, give me

00:29:32.387 --> 00:29:33.454
that gift of wisdom.

00:29:33.454 --> 00:29:34.829
Help me figure out

00:29:34.829 --> 00:29:36.093
this terrible situation,

00:29:36.093 --> 00:29:38.026
help me know how to handle this."

00:29:38.026 --> 00:29:39.224
And God really is Someone

00:29:39.224 --> 00:29:42.033
who uses the Holy Spirit to inspire us.

00:29:42.033 --> 00:29:43.549
(Derek) Yes, Nicole. Thank you.

00:29:43.549 --> 00:29:45.313
(Nicole) I would also say that people

00:29:45.313 --> 00:29:47.078
make a decision and they stick to it,

00:29:47.078 --> 00:29:48.118
and they want to know

00:29:48.118 --> 00:29:49.922
that they're right in their decision.

00:29:49.922 --> 00:29:52.792
It's hard to tell them, "You're wrong
for what you've done."

00:29:52.792 --> 00:29:56.008
We need to have prayer and the Holy Spirit
helping us with our words

00:29:56.008 --> 00:29:58.345
to be able to reach someone
that's made a decision

00:29:58.345 --> 00:30:00.870
that they believe is right and that they
want to make.

00:30:00.870 --> 00:30:01.991
(Derek) And sometimes,

00:30:01.991 --> 00:30:03.686
like Malaina said earlier,

00:30:03.686 --> 00:30:06.128
it takes courage to go to someone

00:30:06.128 --> 00:30:08.393
and say, "Brother, let me tell you

00:30:08.393 --> 00:30:09.448
where you'll end up

00:30:09.448 --> 00:30:10.907
if you go down that road."

00:30:10.907 --> 00:30:12.007
Like Chris was saying,

00:30:12.007 --> 00:30:13.337
"I've been down that road,"

00:30:13.337 --> 00:30:16.010
or, "My parents went down that road,"
or whatever.

00:30:16.010 --> 00:30:18.827
Sometimes that takes courage,
right? Travis?

00:30:18.827 --> 00:30:19.969
(Travis) Desperate times

00:30:19.969 --> 00:30:21.341
call for desperate measures.

00:30:21.341 --> 00:30:22.731
This is a God-sized problem.

00:30:22.731 --> 00:30:23.927
This isn't a leaky faucet

00:30:23.927 --> 00:30:25.437
that I need a wrench to go fix.

00:30:25.437 --> 00:30:26.661
This is something that he

00:30:26.661 --> 00:30:28.502
cannot handle on his own.

00:30:28.502 --> 00:30:30.672
So, when you have a God-sized problem,

00:30:30.672 --> 00:30:32.407
you have to fall on your knees.

00:30:32.407 --> 00:30:34.408
(Derek) Yeah, and seek wisdom

00:30:34.408 --> 00:30:36.040
like Evelyn said. Jonathan?

00:30:36.040 --> 00:30:37.520
(Jonathan) I think, as well,

00:30:37.520 --> 00:30:40.603
that sometimes we, when we're
in situations like that,

00:30:40.603 --> 00:30:41.788
we can make things worse

00:30:41.788 --> 00:30:42.798
if we're not careful.

00:30:42.798 --> 00:30:45.435
I mean, if we start acting out of emotion

00:30:45.435 --> 00:30:48.605
and out of trust in ourselves,

00:30:48.605 --> 00:30:51.139
we can lay foundations

00:30:51.139 --> 00:30:53.578
that can maybe go in directions like...

00:30:53.578 --> 00:30:55.261
(Derek) Could we make things worse?

00:30:55.261 --> 00:30:56.498
(Jonathan) Oh, yeah.

00:30:56.498 --> 00:30:58.524
(Derek) We could make things worse.
Adison?

00:30:58.524 --> 00:31:00.028
(Adison) Just to add onto that,

00:31:00.028 --> 00:31:01.323
we just need to be praying

00:31:01.323 --> 00:31:02.693
for a spirit of tactfulness,

00:31:02.693 --> 00:31:04.707
for a winsome spirit,

00:31:04.707 --> 00:31:06.987
and, yeah, the ability

00:31:06.987 --> 00:31:10.716
to say yea or nay, right,

00:31:10.716 --> 00:31:12.817
just the way we handle it...

00:31:12.817 --> 00:31:15.680
Just have the discipline

00:31:15.680 --> 00:31:17.467
when we approach someone.

00:31:17.467 --> 00:31:20.020
(Derek) It appears, from reading the text,

00:31:20.020 --> 00:31:24.844
that Ezra holds the leaders,

00:31:24.844 --> 00:31:27.954
can I say, at a higher standard?

00:31:27.954 --> 00:31:29.420
Maybe not, maybe we all

00:31:29.420 --> 00:31:30.542
have the same standard.

00:31:30.542 --> 00:31:32.110
But he expects more of them

00:31:32.110 --> 00:31:34.552
because they are leaders.

00:31:34.552 --> 00:31:38.483
Is that fair? We're all human beings, Tom.

00:31:38.483 --> 00:31:42.687
Why have a higher expectation of leaders?

00:31:42.687 --> 00:31:44.274
(Thomas) The leaders are the ones

00:31:44.274 --> 00:31:45.775
who set the examples

00:31:45.775 --> 00:31:47.528
for everybody else to follow.

00:31:47.528 --> 00:31:48.847
The question I have is,

00:31:48.847 --> 00:31:52.162
why did they listen to him?

00:31:52.162 --> 00:31:53.511
(Derek) Why <i>did</i> they listen?

00:31:53.511 --> 00:31:54.581
(Thomas) Yeah, like...

00:31:54.581 --> 00:31:55.662
(Derek) Good question

00:31:55.662 --> 00:31:57.404
because he was a leader, too, right?

00:31:57.404 --> 00:31:58.277
What do you think,

00:31:58.277 --> 00:31:59.639
in answer to Tom's question?

00:31:59.639 --> 00:32:00.931
Why did they listen to him?

00:32:00.931 --> 00:32:02.627
They hadn't been listening before.

00:32:02.627 --> 00:32:04.915
Why did they listen to John the Baptist

00:32:04.915 --> 00:32:06.909
when he told them what to do?

00:32:06.909 --> 00:32:10.479
Why did they listen to Jesus?

00:32:10.479 --> 00:32:12.647
What's the answer to that question? Heide?

00:32:12.647 --> 00:32:15.235
(Heide) I think that they knew
it was true,

00:32:15.235 --> 00:32:16.873
and the Holy Spirit convicted them

00:32:16.873 --> 00:32:18.407
of that, that it was true.

00:32:18.407 --> 00:32:22.020
(Derek) But they'd known that before.

00:32:22.020 --> 00:32:24.968
They knew before, didn't they?

00:32:24.968 --> 00:32:27.488
Why did they listen to him?

00:32:27.488 --> 00:32:28.951
Chris, what do you think?

00:32:28.951 --> 00:32:30.191
(Chris) I do think it was

00:32:30.191 --> 00:32:31.652
the power of the Holy Spirit.

00:32:31.652 --> 00:32:34.921
I think, in terms of the people,

00:32:34.921 --> 00:32:36.886
even though they kind of knew before,

00:32:36.886 --> 00:32:38.971
I think they were dealing with a situation

00:32:38.971 --> 00:32:41.050
where there had been generations
of mistakes

00:32:41.050 --> 00:32:42.998
because they had been living in Babylon.

00:32:42.998 --> 00:32:44.594
And before that, the generations

00:32:44.594 --> 00:32:46.357
that came before them had done wrong,

00:32:46.357 --> 00:32:48.624
and that's why they had been living
in Babylon.

00:32:48.624 --> 00:32:50.583
So now we're dealing with a set of people

00:32:50.583 --> 00:32:52.734
that, even though they know
what the laws are,

00:32:52.734 --> 00:32:54.461
they've never seem them applied.

00:32:54.461 --> 00:32:55.907
And so you need the power

00:32:55.907 --> 00:32:57.624
of the Holy Spirit in those moments

00:32:57.624 --> 00:33:00.168
to deal with generational teachings.

00:33:00.168 --> 00:33:02.070
And I think that's why it was effective,

00:33:02.070 --> 00:33:04.480
because Ezra took the time
to fast and pray

00:33:04.480 --> 00:33:06.428
and allow the Lord to speak through him,

00:33:06.428 --> 00:33:07.943
so that way, the people,

00:33:07.943 --> 00:33:09.599
through all that generational mess

00:33:09.599 --> 00:33:10.856
that was in their minds,

00:33:10.856 --> 00:33:12.113
could hear what Ezra

00:33:12.113 --> 00:33:13.460
was actually trying to say.

00:33:13.460 --> 00:33:15.523
(Derek) I mean, it was
clearly supernatural,

00:33:15.523 --> 00:33:16.744
but I would respond,

00:33:16.744 --> 00:33:18.963
they listened to Him because they saw

00:33:18.963 --> 00:33:21.170
that God was with him.

00:33:21.170 --> 00:33:23.417
John the Baptist, when he said,

00:33:23.417 --> 00:33:25.709
"If you've got two coats,
sell one of them.

00:33:25.709 --> 00:33:28.562
If they ask you to go a mile, go two,"

00:33:28.562 --> 00:33:30.137
and right after that it says,

00:33:30.137 --> 00:33:33.209
"Some even wondered if He was the Christ."

00:33:33.209 --> 00:33:38.850
So he lived, right, a credible life

00:33:38.850 --> 00:33:42.495
as you would as a woman of God/man of God

00:33:42.495 --> 00:33:45.347
that gives you a certain credibility,

00:33:45.347 --> 00:33:50.484
authority, which isn't just given
but earned.

00:33:50.484 --> 00:33:52.965
They listened to him.

00:33:52.965 --> 00:33:54.891
There's one verse in 1 Peter

00:33:54.891 --> 00:33:58.333
that I think is helpful for us

00:33:58.333 --> 00:34:02.687
about leadership and expecting more
of leaders.

00:34:02.687 --> 00:34:07.202
By the way, we are all leaders, right?

00:34:07.202 --> 00:34:10.614
We all have a circle of influence, right?

00:34:10.614 --> 00:34:12.379
It could be our dorm room.

00:34:12.379 --> 00:34:14.889
It could be our family.

00:34:14.889 --> 00:34:19.478
It could be we're a supervisor at work.

00:34:19.478 --> 00:34:20.533
Adison, would you read

00:34:20.533 --> 00:34:24.033
from 1 Peter, chapter 5, verses 1 to 4?

00:34:24.033 --> 00:34:26.619
Here, Peter, who used to operate

00:34:26.619 --> 00:34:29.781
a fishing business with his brother
Andrew,

00:34:29.781 --> 00:34:31.023
so he'd been a leader

00:34:31.023 --> 00:34:32.953
in that circle of influence,

00:34:32.953 --> 00:34:34.092
let's hear what he says

00:34:34.092 --> 00:34:37.473
about expecting something

00:34:37.473 --> 00:34:39.810
of those who are in a leadership position.

00:34:39.810 --> 00:34:41.187
(Adison) And I'll be reading

00:34:41.187 --> 00:34:42.524
from the King James Version:

00:35:21.521 --> 00:35:23.182
(Derek) So, your Bible says

00:35:23.182 --> 00:35:25.249
"ensamples to the flock."

00:35:25.249 --> 00:35:27.072
Does anyone have another translation?

00:35:27.072 --> 00:35:28.346
(Travis) Examples.

00:35:28.346 --> 00:35:29.754
(Derek) Examples, okay.

00:35:29.754 --> 00:35:31.652
It reminds me of what Paul says

00:35:31.652 --> 00:35:34.081
where he says, "Follow me

00:35:34.081 --> 00:35:35.883
as I follow Christ."

00:35:35.883 --> 00:35:39.143
You see, people are going
going to follow the leader.

00:35:39.149 --> 00:35:41.911
If you're a mother, a father,

00:35:41.911 --> 00:35:44.476
a leader in your community,

00:35:44.476 --> 00:35:45.686
people look up to you;

00:35:45.686 --> 00:35:47.657
you're an older young lady,

00:35:47.657 --> 00:35:48.997
and there are younger girls

00:35:48.997 --> 00:35:50.642
that look up to you, right?

00:35:50.642 --> 00:35:53.372
And he's saying that's part

00:35:53.372 --> 00:35:55.230
of being a leader.

00:35:55.230 --> 00:35:58.748
And he's saying, "Your example

00:35:58.748 --> 00:36:00.852
is impacting other people." Travis?

00:36:00.852 --> 00:36:03.583
(Travis) I think of the verse
we sang as a Scripture song

00:36:03.583 --> 00:36:04.946
here at Hope Sabbath School,

00:36:04.946 --> 00:36:06.137
"Therefore, I beseech you

00:36:06.137 --> 00:36:08.909
to walk worthy of the calling
with which you were called."

00:36:08.909 --> 00:36:11.414
We've all been called to walk
worthy of that calling.

00:36:11.414 --> 00:36:14.100
(Derek) And the beautiful thing there,
that's not talking

00:36:14.100 --> 00:36:15.316
about earning salvation.

00:36:15.316 --> 00:36:18.663
You've been saved by God's grace;
live like it.

00:36:18.663 --> 00:36:22.210
And that's only by a personal connection
with Jesus, right?

00:36:22.210 --> 00:36:24.593
But here we are, this bad decision,

00:36:24.593 --> 00:36:27.208
of course, is that they were allowing

00:36:27.208 --> 00:36:31.153
their sons to marry unbelieving women

00:36:31.153 --> 00:36:32.608
and allowing their daughters

00:36:32.608 --> 00:36:34.802
to marry unbelieving men.

00:36:34.802 --> 00:36:36.465
The Bible has some more to say.

00:36:36.465 --> 00:36:37.580
Well, let's just look

00:36:37.580 --> 00:36:39.362
at how Ezra addresses it

00:36:39.362 --> 00:36:41.141
before we look at some other counsel.

00:36:41.141 --> 00:36:42.716
In Ezra, chapter 10 still,

00:36:42.716 --> 00:36:45.582
verses 10 through 12.

00:36:45.582 --> 00:36:47.661
Nicole, could you read that for us?

00:36:47.661 --> 00:36:49.602
(Nicole) Sure, Ezra 10,

00:36:49.602 --> 00:36:51.275
verses 10 through 12,

00:36:51.275 --> 00:36:53.454
the New Living Translation says:

00:37:24.959 --> 00:37:27.367
(Derek) Is that an easy thing to ask?

00:37:27.367 --> 00:37:28.902
(Team) No.

00:37:28.902 --> 00:37:30.697
(Derek) "But, Ezra, I've been married

00:37:30.697 --> 00:37:31.764
to this lady for...,"

00:37:31.764 --> 00:37:32.842
(Nicole) Twenty years.

00:37:32.842 --> 00:37:37.960
(Derek) Whatever the number is, right?

00:37:37.960 --> 00:37:41.577
What do you think about his...

00:37:41.577 --> 00:37:44.698
He spent time fasting and praying.

00:37:44.698 --> 00:37:47.950
He's been grieving, right?

00:37:47.950 --> 00:37:51.429
He'd been pulling out his own beard.

00:37:51.429 --> 00:37:58.342
But now he gives a very straight command.
Jason?

00:37:58.342 --> 00:37:59.985
(Jason) I like that even before he

00:37:59.985 --> 00:38:01.265
gives the command, though,

00:38:01.265 --> 00:38:02.592
he says, "Make confession

00:38:02.592 --> 00:38:04.286
to the Lord God of your fathers."

00:38:04.286 --> 00:38:05.296
So, before the action

00:38:05.296 --> 00:38:06.896
and the separating there,

00:38:06.896 --> 00:38:08.066
there's the confession.

00:38:08.066 --> 00:38:09.736
There's the individual recognition

00:38:09.736 --> 00:38:11.282
of the wrong that has been done.

00:38:11.282 --> 00:38:13.408
And so I like that he puts that

00:38:13.408 --> 00:38:15.382
before he gives the command.

00:38:15.382 --> 00:38:17.969
It shows the process of how God

00:38:17.969 --> 00:38:20.998
has been working in this decision.

00:38:20.998 --> 00:38:22.880
(Derek) So, how would you respond, Tom,

00:38:22.880 --> 00:38:24.092
to someone who might say,

00:38:24.092 --> 00:38:26.032
"Well, obviously that was a bad mistake,

00:38:26.032 --> 00:38:28.516
but just setting aside that pagan wife,

00:38:28.516 --> 00:38:30.413
that's like adding another mistake

00:38:30.413 --> 00:38:32.322
to a mistake you've already committed"?

00:38:32.322 --> 00:38:35.619
I mean, who's going to care for this lady?

00:38:35.619 --> 00:38:37.975
How would you respond to that?

00:38:37.975 --> 00:38:39.966
(Thomas) The thing that comes to my mind

00:38:39.966 --> 00:38:42.710
is that it's not automatic

00:38:42.710 --> 00:38:48.038
that it's going to inevitably be
a separation.

00:38:48.038 --> 00:38:50.353
I think what it could mean

00:38:50.353 --> 00:38:52.852
is that they're setting a standard

00:38:52.852 --> 00:38:55.777
of what they expect of their partners.

00:38:55.777 --> 00:38:57.405
Like, just to give you an example,

00:38:57.405 --> 00:38:59.010
I think so many people

00:38:59.010 --> 00:39:01.100
who are going into relationships

00:39:01.100 --> 00:39:04.615
need to have expectations
for their partner.

00:39:04.615 --> 00:39:06.212
I remember when my wife,

00:39:06.212 --> 00:39:08.706
or who was my girlfriend at the time

00:39:08.706 --> 00:39:10.401
and wanted to date me,

00:39:10.401 --> 00:39:11.876
she said, "I want to make sure

00:39:11.876 --> 00:39:13.400
that you're spiritual first,"

00:39:13.400 --> 00:39:15.034
and she said, "I want to see

00:39:15.034 --> 00:39:17.340
that you're growing spiritually."

00:39:17.340 --> 00:39:19.543
And she set that standard.

00:39:19.543 --> 00:39:21.991
And I stepped up because I wanted

00:39:21.991 --> 00:39:23.580
to be in that relationship.

00:39:23.580 --> 00:39:25.341
And I think so many people

00:39:25.341 --> 00:39:27.227
don't realize what they have,

00:39:27.227 --> 00:39:28.770
and so they don't value it.

00:39:28.770 --> 00:39:31.160
And I think what I'm hearing him say

00:39:31.160 --> 00:39:32.899
is, "We really have something;

00:39:32.899 --> 00:39:35.173
you need to value it and have expectations

00:39:35.173 --> 00:39:37.254
and standards for yourself."

00:39:37.254 --> 00:39:39.901
I don't think it necessarily follows

00:39:39.901 --> 00:39:42.058
that they have to separate

00:39:42.058 --> 00:39:45.227
unless they're not willing to step it up,

00:39:45.227 --> 00:39:46.576
but it's possible that many

00:39:46.576 --> 00:39:47.497
of them might have.

00:39:47.497 --> 00:39:49.148
(Derek) That's a powerful insight.

00:39:49.148 --> 00:39:50.735
You know, it may be that you say,

00:39:50.735 --> 00:39:52.743
"We can't continue where we're

00:39:52.743 --> 00:39:54.430
not in spiritual harmony,"

00:39:54.430 --> 00:39:58.757
and that spouse may go and seek God

00:39:58.757 --> 00:40:01.194
and be transformed, right?

00:40:01.194 --> 00:40:02.740
And say, "You know, I need

00:40:02.740 --> 00:40:04.915
to leave the gods."

00:40:04.915 --> 00:40:06.712
Can you think of someone in the Bible

00:40:06.712 --> 00:40:07.728
who did that, right

00:40:07.728 --> 00:40:09.926
(we're going to get to those
in just a minute),

00:40:09.926 --> 00:40:11.652
that it's not inevitable

00:40:11.652 --> 00:40:12.750
that that would mean

00:40:12.750 --> 00:40:16.293
a permanent separation?

00:40:16.293 --> 00:40:18.504
But it's drawing clear boundaries

00:40:18.504 --> 00:40:20.719
of what God wants to see, right?

00:40:20.719 --> 00:40:23.152
So let's broaden it out a little bit,

00:40:23.152 --> 00:40:25.093
and let's say, can you name

00:40:25.093 --> 00:40:27.718
some other Bible characters besides...

00:40:27.718 --> 00:40:29.177
Who was the one that Ezra used

00:40:29.177 --> 00:40:30.259
as an example who made

00:40:30.259 --> 00:40:31.379
some bad decisions?

00:40:31.379 --> 00:40:32.136
(Team) Solomon.

00:40:32.136 --> 00:40:33.430
(Derek) Solomon, right?

00:40:33.430 --> 00:40:37.392
Actually he made 700 bad decisions

00:40:37.392 --> 00:40:40.121
and 300 girlfriends, right?

00:40:40.121 --> 00:40:42.006
Yes, that's a thousand.

00:40:42.006 --> 00:40:43.801
Now, I suppose some of them

00:40:43.801 --> 00:40:45.736
might have been believers

00:40:45.736 --> 00:40:47.060
in the true God of Heaven,

00:40:47.060 --> 00:40:48.651
so we're not sure,

00:40:48.651 --> 00:40:52.147
but certainly he was an example Ezra used.

00:40:52.147 --> 00:40:55.363
It was devastating, not only to him,

00:40:55.363 --> 00:40:57.499
but to the kingdom.

00:40:57.499 --> 00:41:01.607
Think of some other examples

00:41:01.607 --> 00:41:03.972
in the Bible, now, where marrying

00:41:03.972 --> 00:41:07.718
an unbelieving spouse, a spouse

00:41:07.718 --> 00:41:10.067
who was not seeking the God of Heaven,

00:41:10.067 --> 00:41:13.221
had really damaging effects. Heide?

00:41:13.221 --> 00:41:16.168
(Heide) Samson is a prime example.

00:41:16.168 --> 00:41:18.967
(Derek) "But I like her," I mean,

00:41:18.967 --> 00:41:20.490
isn't that what he said?

00:41:20.490 --> 00:41:22.354
"She looks hot," that's

00:41:22.354 --> 00:41:26.598
a rough translation of the Hebrew.

00:41:26.598 --> 00:41:28.752
"She looks good to me."

00:41:28.752 --> 00:41:29.959
And the parents are like,

00:41:29.959 --> 00:41:34.261
"There are lots of good-looking girls
who love God."

00:41:34.261 --> 00:41:36.538
Great example. Damaging?

00:41:36.538 --> 00:41:38.446
(Team) Yes.

00:41:38.446 --> 00:41:39.650
(Derek) I wonder how much

00:41:39.650 --> 00:41:40.685
he thought about that

00:41:40.685 --> 00:41:43.933
after his eyes had been gouged out, right?

00:41:43.933 --> 00:41:47.200
"Wow, I was living for my eyes

00:41:47.200 --> 00:41:51.766
and ended up losing them," wow.

00:41:51.766 --> 00:41:55.014
Another example besides Samson. Travis?

00:41:55.014 --> 00:41:56.928
(Travis) I think of Ahab because...

00:41:56.928 --> 00:42:00.641
(Derek) Ahab! You always wonder.

00:42:00.641 --> 00:42:02.471
You know, you think of Ahab and think,

00:42:02.471 --> 00:42:03.802
well, he was clearly wicked.

00:42:03.802 --> 00:42:07.333
What if he had found a godly companion

00:42:07.333 --> 00:42:10.366
who, like Thomas' girlfriend

00:42:10.366 --> 00:42:11.453
at the time, Hannah,

00:42:11.453 --> 00:42:12.684
said, "I need to know

00:42:12.684 --> 00:42:14.538
that you're really seeking God"?

00:42:14.538 --> 00:42:16.735
And Ahab could have said, "I need to,"

00:42:16.735 --> 00:42:20.511
to quote Thomas, "step it up."

00:42:20.511 --> 00:42:22.078
Instead, what was the name

00:42:22.078 --> 00:42:23.667
of the lady he married?

00:42:23.667 --> 00:42:25.293
(Team) Jezebel.

00:42:25.293 --> 00:42:28.595
(Derek) You know, <i>famous</i> for her...

00:42:28.595 --> 00:42:29.851
(Heide) Wickedness.

00:42:29.851 --> 00:42:31.619
(Derek) Wickedness.

00:42:31.619 --> 00:42:33.734
I mean, even unbelievers today, they don't

00:42:33.734 --> 00:42:36.944
name any of their daughters Jezebel.

00:42:36.944 --> 00:42:41.217
It's a name that will live
in infamy, right?

00:42:41.217 --> 00:42:43.031
So there are examples.

00:42:43.031 --> 00:42:44.758
(Chris) I was commenting on Jezebel.

00:42:44.758 --> 00:42:47.247
The Bible says that even though Ahab...

00:42:47.247 --> 00:42:48.496
As if Ahab didn't do

00:42:48.496 --> 00:42:50.231
enough bad stuff already,

00:42:50.231 --> 00:42:52.128
he went and married Jezebel.

00:42:52.128 --> 00:42:54.235
That marriage that he did was so bad

00:42:54.235 --> 00:42:55.507
that it was worse than any

00:42:55.507 --> 00:42:57.608
of the other things that he
had already done.

00:42:57.608 --> 00:42:59.745
And it's because of what it
would mean later,

00:42:59.745 --> 00:43:02.204
but that's how bad that decision was,

00:43:02.204 --> 00:43:04.945
that God held it more than any
of his other sins.

00:43:04.945 --> 00:43:06.731
(Derek) So, that's the bad.

00:43:06.731 --> 00:43:07.742
Let's go to the good.

00:43:07.742 --> 00:43:10.738
Let's go...Who married up?

00:43:10.738 --> 00:43:13.126
Who maybe married someone...

00:43:13.126 --> 00:43:15.048
I really like what Tom said,

00:43:15.048 --> 00:43:18.288
that, when he said, unbelieving spouse,

00:43:18.288 --> 00:43:19.900
that doesn't necessarily mean

00:43:19.900 --> 00:43:23.029
it was a permanent separation.

00:43:23.029 --> 00:43:25.826
You could say, "Here's someone.

00:43:25.826 --> 00:43:27.773
I just need to know that their heart

00:43:27.773 --> 00:43:30.357
is desiring to follow

00:43:30.357 --> 00:43:32.604
the one true God of Heaven."

00:43:32.604 --> 00:43:34.440
Some stories of a good example,

00:43:34.440 --> 00:43:35.832
can you think of one?

00:43:35.832 --> 00:43:37.013
(Adison) Boaz and Ruth.

00:43:37.013 --> 00:43:38.024
(Derek) That's right.

00:43:38.024 --> 00:43:39.676
Ruth, he goes, "I'm going to marry

00:43:39.676 --> 00:43:40.748
this young lady Ruth."

00:43:40.748 --> 00:43:43.307
They're like, "Ruth?! She's from..."?

00:43:43.307 --> 00:43:44.557
(Team) Moab.

00:43:44.557 --> 00:43:45.749
(Derek) That's where they

00:43:45.749 --> 00:43:47.782
have gods like Marduk.

00:43:47.782 --> 00:43:49.200
I mean, that's where they

00:43:49.200 --> 00:43:52.931
sacrifice their children in the fire!

00:43:52.931 --> 00:43:58.254
"You're going to marry <i>Ruth?!</i>"

00:43:58.254 --> 00:43:59.660
And the answer is...?

00:43:59.660 --> 00:44:01.554
(Nicole) "Yes," she demonstrated

00:44:01.554 --> 00:44:04.765
that she was a believer in Christ

00:44:04.765 --> 00:44:06.599
because when she came back with Naomi,

00:44:06.599 --> 00:44:09.008
he could see that she loved Naomi

00:44:09.008 --> 00:44:11.795
enough, to be able to understand
that she could be someone

00:44:11.795 --> 00:44:14.323
that was going to love God,
and she was going to make

00:44:14.323 --> 00:44:15.899
this whole family a better place.

00:44:15.899 --> 00:44:18.193
(Derek) Of course, Christ means
the Anointed One

00:44:18.193 --> 00:44:20.746
who has not even come, but she's
believing the promise

00:44:20.746 --> 00:44:22.113
of the Messiah who will come

00:44:22.113 --> 00:44:23.986
who will be the Savior of God's people.

00:44:23.986 --> 00:44:25.635
"And your people will be..."?

00:44:25.635 --> 00:44:26.793
(Team) "...my people..."

00:44:26.793 --> 00:44:28.183
(Derek) "...and your God..."?

00:44:28.183 --> 00:44:29.157
(Team) "...my God."

00:44:29.157 --> 00:44:30.366
(Derek) And did Boaz make

00:44:30.366 --> 00:44:32.079
a mistake in marrying Ruth?

00:44:32.079 --> 00:44:33.242
(Team) No/Not at all.

00:44:33.242 --> 00:44:34.362
(Derek) You can ask him

00:44:34.362 --> 00:44:36.085
when you see him in the Kingdom,

00:44:36.085 --> 00:44:39.254
and he'll say, "Best decision
I ever made."

00:44:39.254 --> 00:44:40.862
Can you think of another one,

00:44:40.862 --> 00:44:44.514
where someone who maybe wasn't

00:44:44.514 --> 00:44:49.986
originally part of the family,
was changed?

00:44:49.986 --> 00:44:52.595
Anybody else you can think of? Nicole?

00:44:52.595 --> 00:44:54.579
(Nicole) My favorite character is Esther.

00:44:54.579 --> 00:44:55.589
(Derek) Esther?

00:44:55.589 --> 00:44:57.735
(Nicole) She married the king of Persia.

00:44:57.735 --> 00:44:59.639
At the time, he was not a God-seeker

00:44:59.639 --> 00:45:00.954
or a God-believer,

00:45:00.954 --> 00:45:02.752
but I think through her example

00:45:02.752 --> 00:45:06.935
of how she looked in the palace
before they got married

00:45:06.935 --> 00:45:09.206
and then marrying her and her sacrifice

00:45:09.206 --> 00:45:11.608
and just seeing her character...

00:45:11.608 --> 00:45:13.133
He may not have been a believer,

00:45:13.133 --> 00:45:14.389
but I think he came around

00:45:14.389 --> 00:45:15.732
to understand that there was

00:45:15.732 --> 00:45:19.313
a power in her that was bigger
than what he was.

00:45:19.313 --> 00:45:20.685
(Derek) Very interesting.

00:45:20.685 --> 00:45:22.111
Of course, you know, there are

00:45:22.111 --> 00:45:23.880
a lot of questions in the story.

00:45:23.880 --> 00:45:26.277
But one can only imagine in the harem,

00:45:26.277 --> 00:45:27.906
which is what she was part of,

00:45:27.906 --> 00:45:29.647
where they were rotating young girls

00:45:29.647 --> 00:45:31.396
through, was it every night?

00:45:31.396 --> 00:45:34.416
I forget how often they went through.

00:45:34.416 --> 00:45:36.367
But I'm sure some of them were thinking,

00:45:36.367 --> 00:45:39.092
"What's the most outrageous thing

00:45:39.092 --> 00:45:41.379
I could do that would set me apart?"

00:45:41.379 --> 00:45:44.673
And Hadassah, who is called Esther,

00:45:44.673 --> 00:45:46.516
is thinking, "How do I let

00:45:46.516 --> 00:45:48.720
the light of God shine out?"

00:45:48.720 --> 00:45:51.857
And you're right, this pagan king,

00:45:51.857 --> 00:45:53.650
he sees the light of God,

00:45:53.650 --> 00:45:55.735
and God uses a pagan king

00:45:55.735 --> 00:45:59.484
to deliver His people, God's people.

00:45:59.484 --> 00:46:02.083
So, we ought not to write...

00:46:02.083 --> 00:46:03.230
We have an expression

00:46:03.230 --> 00:46:04.275
in English, don't we,

00:46:04.275 --> 00:46:06.056
to write people off?

00:46:06.056 --> 00:46:07.077
We ought not to say,

00:46:07.077 --> 00:46:08.200
"Just because you were

00:46:08.200 --> 00:46:09.693
born in that family...,"

00:46:09.693 --> 00:46:12.058
back to what Tom was saying earlier.

00:46:12.058 --> 00:46:14.069
We ought to see what the direction

00:46:14.069 --> 00:46:16.281
of the heart is, right?

00:46:16.281 --> 00:46:20.474
Oh, boy, but let me hyperspace
over to that.

00:46:20.474 --> 00:46:23.754
But someone's contemplating
marrying someone they...

00:46:23.754 --> 00:46:27.094
"Oh, but he's so wonderful,"

00:46:27.094 --> 00:46:29.754
or, "She's so wonderful.

00:46:29.754 --> 00:46:31.530
She doesn't believe in Jesus,

00:46:31.530 --> 00:46:34.046
but she's so good to me."

00:46:34.046 --> 00:46:36.919
"He's so kind to me."

00:46:36.919 --> 00:46:38.785
Stephanie, help us.

00:46:38.785 --> 00:46:40.747
There are people watching who are going,

00:46:40.747 --> 00:46:45.249
"Oh, he's been reading my emails."

00:46:45.249 --> 00:46:47.272
There are several things we might respond,

00:46:47.272 --> 00:46:49.694
and there's not going to be one
pat answer, right?

00:46:49.694 --> 00:46:52.576
What would you say to her or to him?

00:46:52.576 --> 00:46:54.040
(Stephanie) I think the burden

00:46:54.040 --> 00:46:55.379
that I would share with them

00:46:55.379 --> 00:46:58.108
is that, "Your value is not based

00:46:58.108 --> 00:46:59.692
on words of other people,

00:46:59.692 --> 00:47:01.822
but it's based on the blood
of Jesus Christ.

00:47:01.822 --> 00:47:03.812
So, when you can find your value

00:47:03.812 --> 00:47:06.444
and your self-worth in Jesus,

00:47:06.444 --> 00:47:08.912
then He will bring you to the person

00:47:08.912 --> 00:47:12.410
who also is focusing on Jesus."

00:47:12.410 --> 00:47:15.138
(Derek) Okay, so that aspect

00:47:15.138 --> 00:47:17.547
then would say, "No matter how sweet

00:47:17.547 --> 00:47:20.281
or kind or how often they compliment you,

00:47:20.281 --> 00:47:22.462
if their heart hasn't

00:47:22.462 --> 00:47:25.118
been surrendered to Jesus...,"

00:47:25.118 --> 00:47:26.971
what should they do?

00:47:26.971 --> 00:47:29.347
There are several verbs we might use here.

00:47:29.347 --> 00:47:30.473
(Team) Run.

00:47:30.473 --> 00:47:33.937
(Derek) One might be run, certainly run

00:47:33.937 --> 00:47:35.719
if it's an abusive relationship

00:47:35.719 --> 00:47:39.632
where they're kind of, what would you say,

00:47:39.632 --> 00:47:41.499
dominating you, right?

00:47:41.499 --> 00:47:43.268
Run. What other verbs

00:47:43.268 --> 00:47:44.871
might we use besides run?

00:47:44.871 --> 00:47:45.732
(Heide) Kneel.

00:47:45.732 --> 00:47:50.909
(Derek) Kneel, yes, kneel. Others?

00:47:50.909 --> 00:47:52.783
(Stephanie) Pray while you're kneeling.

00:47:52.783 --> 00:47:58.566
(Derek) Pray. What about wait?

00:47:58.566 --> 00:48:02.102
Why could waiting be helpful, Adison?

00:48:02.102 --> 00:48:04.534
(Adison) Well, that's sort of the boat

00:48:04.534 --> 00:48:06.500
I'm in right now, actually.

00:48:06.500 --> 00:48:10.198
(Derek) Okay, tell us the story. No.

00:48:10.198 --> 00:48:11.400
(Adison) I think that's

00:48:11.400 --> 00:48:12.811
such an important word.

00:48:12.811 --> 00:48:14.421
And, you know, the Bible

00:48:14.421 --> 00:48:16.269
talks about patience being a virtue.

00:48:16.269 --> 00:48:16.997
(Derek) Yes.

00:48:16.997 --> 00:48:19.535
(Adison) And good things coming
to those who wait.

00:48:19.535 --> 00:48:21.916
And our bodies are the temple of God,

00:48:21.916 --> 00:48:28.042
and if we value our bodies as God -

00:48:28.042 --> 00:48:31.051
like, God has put...He went to every...

00:48:31.051 --> 00:48:32.899
like, He went to the farthest extent

00:48:32.899 --> 00:48:34.791
to save each of us -

00:48:34.791 --> 00:48:36.877
I think we'd realize how much we are worth

00:48:36.877 --> 00:48:38.792
and that we are priceless in God's eyes,

00:48:38.792 --> 00:48:42.425
that we are incomparable, irreplaceable,

00:48:42.425 --> 00:48:43.992
I think we're a lot more willing

00:48:43.992 --> 00:48:46.119
to wait for the right person,

00:48:46.119 --> 00:48:47.270
the right spouse for God

00:48:47.270 --> 00:48:48.756
to bring into our lives.

00:48:48.756 --> 00:48:51.723
He will give us discernment and wisdom

00:48:51.723 --> 00:48:56.531
to be able to make those big decisions.

00:48:56.531 --> 00:48:57.919
I had a pastor that told me

00:48:57.919 --> 00:48:59.701
that the two most important decisions

00:48:59.701 --> 00:49:01.020
you could make in your life

00:49:01.020 --> 00:49:02.114
is, one, when you give

00:49:02.114 --> 00:49:03.150
your heart to Jesus,

00:49:03.150 --> 00:49:05.158
when you make that public declaration

00:49:05.158 --> 00:49:07.571
of your faith in Jesus as your Savior.

00:49:07.571 --> 00:49:09.035
And then the second one,

00:49:09.035 --> 00:49:11.372
who you're going to marry.

00:49:11.372 --> 00:49:13.815
(Derek) So, if I'm hearing

00:49:13.815 --> 00:49:15.987
Adison's testimony clearly,

00:49:15.987 --> 00:49:18.373
his wait is not, "I've got
this relationship;

00:49:18.373 --> 00:49:19.682
I'm not sure it's of God,

00:49:19.682 --> 00:49:20.995
so I'm going to just wait."

00:49:20.995 --> 00:49:22.234
You haven't found it yet,

00:49:22.234 --> 00:49:24.057
so you're waiting until God shows you.

00:49:24.057 --> 00:49:25.881
(Adison) That's right.

00:49:25.881 --> 00:49:27.202
(Derek) Could it also be,

00:49:27.202 --> 00:49:29.961
"I think this is it; wait"?

00:49:29.961 --> 00:49:31.471
(Adison) That could be, too.

00:49:31.471 --> 00:49:35.261
(Derek) Because what will waiting do?

00:49:35.261 --> 00:49:37.221
(Nicole) Show you what you need to see...

00:49:37.221 --> 00:49:38.807
(Jonathan) Demonstrate character.

00:49:38.807 --> 00:49:40.585
(Derek) Someone told me that you can

00:49:40.585 --> 00:49:43.535
wear a mask for about a year
in a relationship.

00:49:43.535 --> 00:49:45.569
This was a marriage counselor, by the way,

00:49:45.569 --> 00:49:47.734
who told me, two years for courting.

00:49:47.734 --> 00:49:50.147
You rush at your peril.

00:49:50.147 --> 00:49:52.075
You say, "But I know someone who rushed,

00:49:52.075 --> 00:49:53.361
and it worked out."

00:49:53.361 --> 00:49:54.776
But I know a lot who rushed,

00:49:54.776 --> 00:49:56.268
and it didn't, right?

00:49:56.268 --> 00:49:58.976
So, waiting gives you time to see

00:49:58.976 --> 00:50:02.754
the true character of the person,
right? Gary?

00:50:02.754 --> 00:50:04.897
(Gary) I was going to say, my wife,

00:50:04.897 --> 00:50:06.878
she wasn't originally a Christian.

00:50:06.878 --> 00:50:08.351
She was a nominal Christian;

00:50:08.351 --> 00:50:10.582
she knew who God was.

00:50:10.582 --> 00:50:11.925
But we were friends,

00:50:11.925 --> 00:50:15.956
and, long story short,

00:50:15.956 --> 00:50:17.617
we started Bible studies,

00:50:17.617 --> 00:50:20.156
and then she went and found a pastor.

00:50:20.156 --> 00:50:21.709
So, she didn't depend on me.

00:50:21.709 --> 00:50:25.313
She found out who Jesus was,

00:50:25.313 --> 00:50:26.924
and she wanted to know more.

00:50:26.924 --> 00:50:28.222
So she went and did

00:50:28.222 --> 00:50:29.906
what she could do to find out

00:50:29.906 --> 00:50:32.453
and started going to church.

00:50:32.453 --> 00:50:38.200
And eventually, after we waited,
we got married.

00:50:38.200 --> 00:50:40.598
But, I mean, I didn't meet her

00:50:40.598 --> 00:50:42.497
and say, "Oh, I want to marry her."

00:50:42.497 --> 00:50:43.931
She was just my friend

00:50:43.931 --> 00:50:45.951
who I was giving studies to.

00:50:45.951 --> 00:50:47.279
And she did the rest

00:50:47.279 --> 00:50:48.818
of the soul-seeking,

00:50:48.818 --> 00:50:50.253
the soul-searching herself

00:50:50.253 --> 00:50:53.364
and found the love of Christ.

00:50:53.364 --> 00:50:55.532
(Derek) We were going to say,
"What happened?"

00:50:55.532 --> 00:50:57.159
but you just called her your wife.

00:50:57.159 --> 00:50:59.247
But that didn't happen

00:50:59.247 --> 00:51:00.502
in a few weeks, you said?

00:51:00.502 --> 00:51:03.262
(Gary) No, no no, it was...

00:51:03.262 --> 00:51:06.843
I knew her, like, 2010,

00:51:06.843 --> 00:51:10.376
and we were married 2015,
so five years, yeah.

00:51:10.376 --> 00:51:13.077
(Derek) Five years, and during that time,

00:51:13.077 --> 00:51:15.083
you saw her grow.

00:51:15.083 --> 00:51:17.098
I'm sure she was watching you, too, right?

00:51:17.098 --> 00:51:19.304
(Gary) Yeah, yeah, she looked

00:51:19.304 --> 00:51:21.957
at how I was with my family

00:51:21.957 --> 00:51:23.520
and my church family

00:51:23.520 --> 00:51:24.944
and my relationship with God,

00:51:24.944 --> 00:51:27.339
and she wanted to do that where she was.

00:51:27.339 --> 00:51:29.070
We were long distance,

00:51:29.070 --> 00:51:32.020
so she was in Kansas, and I was here.

00:51:32.020 --> 00:51:35.221
And it just took time, yeah.

00:51:35.221 --> 00:51:36.230
(Derek) Amen?

00:51:36.230 --> 00:51:37.143
(Team) Amen.

00:51:37.143 --> 00:51:39.526
(Derek) Second Corinthians 6:14 says,

00:51:39.526 --> 00:51:46.807
"Do not be unequally <i>yoked</i>
with unbelievers."

00:51:46.807 --> 00:51:49.014
What is that talking about?

00:51:49.014 --> 00:51:51.070
And then I'm going to ask someone to share

00:51:51.070 --> 00:51:54.799
who grew up in a family where there was

00:51:54.799 --> 00:51:56.877
an unequal yoking together,

00:51:56.877 --> 00:51:59.759
what that was like, okay?

00:51:59.759 --> 00:52:01.169
Do you think that's talking

00:52:01.169 --> 00:52:03.058
about marriage, "Do not

00:52:03.058 --> 00:52:04.600
be unequally yoked," Stephanie?

00:52:04.600 --> 00:52:06.717
(Stephanie) Sure, but I think
it's broader.

00:52:06.717 --> 00:52:08.243
(Derek) Broader, okay, could it

00:52:08.243 --> 00:52:09.869
include marriage to an unbeliever?

00:52:09.869 --> 00:52:10.610
(Team) Yes.

00:52:10.610 --> 00:52:12.604
(Derek) Okay, what else could it include,

00:52:12.604 --> 00:52:14.229
"Do not be unequally yoked," Tom?

00:52:14.229 --> 00:52:16.166
(Thomas) It could involve doing business

00:52:16.166 --> 00:52:18.381
or having a contractual relationship

00:52:18.381 --> 00:52:20.724
with somebody who has different values.

00:52:20.724 --> 00:52:22.304
(Derek) Where you go, "I can't,"

00:52:22.304 --> 00:52:23.989
because two can't walk together

00:52:23.989 --> 00:52:25.495
unless they're agreed, right?

00:52:25.495 --> 00:52:27.128
So it could be a business,

00:52:27.128 --> 00:52:28.875
don't be yoked with a person

00:52:28.875 --> 00:52:30.675
who has different values. Jonathan?

00:52:30.675 --> 00:52:32.509
(Jonathan) I know a number of families

00:52:32.509 --> 00:52:34.391
that I've watched in different churches

00:52:34.391 --> 00:52:36.654
I've been where usually the female,

00:52:36.654 --> 00:52:38.573
but often somebody, one of the couples,

00:52:38.573 --> 00:52:40.326
is just passionate about serving God

00:52:40.326 --> 00:52:42.598
and so into it, but they're alone.

00:52:42.598 --> 00:52:45.471
And they're not able to share that

00:52:45.471 --> 00:52:47.262
with their other half.

00:52:47.262 --> 00:52:51.276
(Derek) So, it may include

00:52:51.276 --> 00:52:53.337
things that you're passionate about,

00:52:53.337 --> 00:52:56.418
goals, not just whether or not

00:52:56.418 --> 00:52:59.096
you believe in God--check--right? Tom?

00:52:59.096 --> 00:53:00.893
(Thomas) In fact, I was going to say

00:53:00.893 --> 00:53:02.153
that just because you have

00:53:02.153 --> 00:53:03.905
the same denominational affiliation

00:53:03.905 --> 00:53:05.665
doesn't mean you're compatible

00:53:05.665 --> 00:53:07.699
or that you even have the same faith

00:53:07.699 --> 00:53:09.706
because many people look for somebody

00:53:09.706 --> 00:53:11.239
of the same ("Oh, check")...

00:53:11.239 --> 00:53:13.303
they've got the same religious beliefs,

00:53:13.303 --> 00:53:14.887
but that doesn't necessarily mean

00:53:14.887 --> 00:53:16.528
that they are good for you, still.

00:53:16.528 --> 00:53:17.319
(Derek) Right.

00:53:17.319 --> 00:53:19.096
(Thomas) They could still be abusive;

00:53:19.096 --> 00:53:20.075
they could still be,

00:53:20.075 --> 00:53:22.178
not in love with Jesus, you know?

00:53:22.178 --> 00:53:23.733
(Derek) Tom, you mentioned to me

00:53:23.733 --> 00:53:24.695
before the broadcast

00:53:24.695 --> 00:53:28.634
that you did grow up in a family,

00:53:28.634 --> 00:53:31.030
would you say it was not equally yoked?

00:53:31.030 --> 00:53:32.959
(Thomas) Yeah, I just want to say first,

00:53:32.959 --> 00:53:34.514
I love my dad, and I have

00:53:34.514 --> 00:53:36.376
a lot of respect for him,

00:53:36.376 --> 00:53:38.299
so I don't want to talk bad about him.

00:53:38.299 --> 00:53:41.376
But he wasn't a believer;
it's just a fact.

00:53:41.376 --> 00:53:43.025
He didn't go to church.

00:53:43.025 --> 00:53:44.458
And it was really hard

00:53:44.458 --> 00:53:46.275
for my family, my mother,

00:53:46.275 --> 00:53:47.658
because, you know, every time

00:53:47.658 --> 00:53:48.911
we wanted to go to church,

00:53:48.911 --> 00:53:49.938
he would stay home.

00:53:49.938 --> 00:53:52.133
And I think we just missed out
on the intimacy

00:53:52.133 --> 00:53:54.142
and that spiritual connection.

00:53:54.142 --> 00:53:55.790
My mother was the spiritual leader

00:53:55.790 --> 00:53:57.678
of her family because of that.

00:53:57.678 --> 00:53:59.047
And I think that led

00:53:59.047 --> 00:54:02.099
to some tension, unfortunately.

00:54:02.099 --> 00:54:04.350
I think, personally from that experience

00:54:04.350 --> 00:54:07.061
I realized how important it is

00:54:07.061 --> 00:54:09.384
to have a relationship that has

00:54:09.384 --> 00:54:13.155
a common faith or at least common values.

00:54:13.155 --> 00:54:14.381
(Derek) So, may I ask

00:54:14.381 --> 00:54:16.110
a personal question in response,

00:54:16.110 --> 00:54:18.893
because you are a committed follower
of Jesus.

00:54:18.893 --> 00:54:20.135
We know that because you

00:54:20.135 --> 00:54:21.992
sought a godly companion, Hannah;

00:54:21.992 --> 00:54:24.672
you shared in this program your testimony.

00:54:24.672 --> 00:54:28.710
And you've grown, even, spiritually
as a couple,

00:54:28.710 --> 00:54:32.637
so who helped you as a mentor

00:54:32.637 --> 00:54:34.388
because your dad spiritually

00:54:34.388 --> 00:54:35.861
was not that for you?

00:54:35.861 --> 00:54:37.127
(Thomas) Well, my mother

00:54:37.127 --> 00:54:39.376
was a good influence for me; I learned

00:54:39.376 --> 00:54:41.261
a lot about relationships from her.

00:54:41.261 --> 00:54:43.257
But she remarried;

00:54:43.257 --> 00:54:45.756
my stepdad was a pastor,

00:54:45.756 --> 00:54:49.078
and he was a really good role model to me,

00:54:49.078 --> 00:54:51.417
and I really appreciated that.

00:54:51.417 --> 00:54:52.703
So that was very helpful.

00:54:52.703 --> 00:54:54.173
But I think the one Person

00:54:54.173 --> 00:54:56.149
that's really made the biggest difference

00:54:56.149 --> 00:54:58.019
in our relationship is God or Jesus.

00:54:58.019 --> 00:54:59.377
I mean that's the biggest...

00:54:59.377 --> 00:55:00.924
(Derek) A personal relationship.

00:55:00.924 --> 00:55:02.751
(Thomas) Having that common connection

00:55:02.751 --> 00:55:04.479
is really what keeps us together.

00:55:04.479 --> 00:55:06.480
(Derek) Is there anyone else here

00:55:06.480 --> 00:55:08.427
that was involved in a relationship

00:55:08.427 --> 00:55:12.223
where God wasn't at the center? Malaina.

00:55:12.223 --> 00:55:14.429
(Malaina) I was actually in a relationship

00:55:14.429 --> 00:55:16.443
for like two-and-a-half years
with someone,

00:55:16.443 --> 00:55:18.748
and when I started learning
more about God

00:55:18.748 --> 00:55:21.136
(I wasn't a follower of Jesus),

00:55:21.136 --> 00:55:23.735
they actually became very jealous of that

00:55:23.735 --> 00:55:25.035
and spending time with God.

00:55:25.035 --> 00:55:26.500
And then I had the opportunity

00:55:26.500 --> 00:55:28.449
to go to the ARISE program in Australia

00:55:28.449 --> 00:55:29.744
that my stepfather, Travis,

00:55:29.744 --> 00:55:31.148
offered for me to go.

00:55:31.148 --> 00:55:32.665
He said, "If you go,

00:55:32.665 --> 00:55:34.233
we're not staying together."

00:55:34.233 --> 00:55:36.055
Like, "You're not going to Australia;

00:55:36.055 --> 00:55:37.175
you're not doing that."

00:55:37.175 --> 00:55:39.004
And long story short,

00:55:39.004 --> 00:55:40.546
I had to end that relationship,

00:55:40.546 --> 00:55:41.559
which was really hard

00:55:41.559 --> 00:55:43.812
because it was not like I
didn't care for him.

00:55:43.812 --> 00:55:46.303
But the result of my ending
that relationship

00:55:46.303 --> 00:55:47.864
ended in my going to Australia

00:55:47.864 --> 00:55:50.262
and giving my heart to Jesus.

00:55:50.262 --> 00:55:51.131
(Team) Amen.

00:55:51.131 --> 00:55:53.957
(Malaina) So it was a good decision
in the long run.

00:55:53.957 --> 00:55:55.659
(Derek) Not necessarily easy.

00:55:55.659 --> 00:55:57.158
(Malaina) No, it was very hard,

00:55:57.158 --> 00:55:58.257
and I wrestled with it

00:55:58.257 --> 00:55:59.336
for three months, too,

00:55:59.336 --> 00:56:03.496
which caused more damage in the long run.

00:56:03.496 --> 00:56:05.018
(Derek) Travis, you were quoted

00:56:05.018 --> 00:56:06.781
in the previous testimony,

00:56:06.781 --> 00:56:08.431
but you've also experienced that

00:56:08.431 --> 00:56:10.857
in your own journey.

00:56:10.857 --> 00:56:14.275
(Travis) I have, and, you know,

00:56:14.275 --> 00:56:15.878
I want to say something positive.

00:56:15.878 --> 00:56:18.117
I know we're getting to the end
of the program.

00:56:18.117 --> 00:56:19.731
I want to say something positive.

00:56:19.731 --> 00:56:21.786
I had a business relationship with someone

00:56:21.786 --> 00:56:23.643
who was not from the same denomination,

00:56:23.643 --> 00:56:25.563
but we respected each others' beliefs.

00:56:25.563 --> 00:56:28.491
We had a beautiful business relationship
for a long time.

00:56:28.491 --> 00:56:32.019
And so, when we are equally yoked,

00:56:32.019 --> 00:56:35.071
positive things can come from that.

00:56:35.071 --> 00:56:38.265
Dan and Billie, my partner's wife
was Billie,

00:56:38.265 --> 00:56:40.600
and his name was Dan, and they are two

00:56:40.600 --> 00:56:42.669
of the most amazing Christian people
I know.

00:56:42.669 --> 00:56:44.231
And it was a beautiful thing

00:56:44.231 --> 00:56:46.302
to be in a business relationship with him.

00:56:46.302 --> 00:56:48.632
(Derek) So, if we've made
some bad decisions,

00:56:48.632 --> 00:56:51.096
we don't have to stay there.

00:56:51.096 --> 00:56:53.477
We can set healthy boundaries,

00:56:53.477 --> 00:56:55.349
and we can move forward.

00:56:55.349 --> 00:56:56.977
If we haven't made bad decisions,

00:56:56.977 --> 00:56:59.119
we don't have to make them.

00:56:59.119 --> 00:57:00.711
You don't have to do that

00:57:00.711 --> 00:57:02.294
in order to know they were bad.

00:57:02.294 --> 00:57:05.527
God wants to guide us, my friend,
through His Word.

00:57:05.527 --> 00:57:07.058
But what's so important is,

00:57:07.058 --> 00:57:09.405
wherever you are, He loves you

00:57:09.405 --> 00:57:12.209
with an immeasurable and unfailing love.

00:57:12.209 --> 00:57:13.753
And He wants to surround you

00:57:13.753 --> 00:57:15.609
with people who love Him and love you -

00:57:15.609 --> 00:57:17.911
ve've heard those testimonies,
even today -

00:57:17.911 --> 00:57:19.453
to guide your steps

00:57:19.453 --> 00:57:21.733
and to help you in that new life.

00:57:21.733 --> 00:57:23.016
We've all got times

00:57:23.016 --> 00:57:25.281
when we've made bad decisions,

00:57:25.281 --> 00:57:27.283
but He can give us a new beginning.

00:57:27.283 --> 00:57:29.214
Let's pray for that even today.

00:57:29.214 --> 00:57:31.984
Father in Heaven, thank You so much

00:57:31.984 --> 00:57:33.410
that You're patient and kind.

00:57:33.410 --> 00:57:34.946
You never give up; You can

00:57:34.946 --> 00:57:36.354
always give new beginnings

00:57:36.354 --> 00:57:38.247
to those who call upon You.

00:57:38.247 --> 00:57:42.283
And I thank You that, as we seek You
and find You,

00:57:42.283 --> 00:57:44.962
that You will direct our steps each day.

00:57:44.962 --> 00:57:46.838
In the name of Jesus. Amen.

00:57:46.838 --> 00:57:47.777
(Team) Amen.

00:57:47.777 --> 00:57:49.224
(Derek) Thanks for joining us

00:57:49.224 --> 00:57:50.380
for Hope Sabbath School.

00:57:50.380 --> 00:57:51.673
I know you want to send me

00:57:51.673 --> 00:57:53.316
all the bad decisions you've made,

00:57:53.316 --> 00:57:54.749
but just praise Jesus

00:57:54.749 --> 00:57:56.120
that He will guide you

00:57:56.120 --> 00:57:57.901
in better decisions.

00:57:57.901 --> 00:57:59.605
And one decision you can make today

00:57:59.605 --> 00:58:02.059
is to go out and share the love of Jesus

00:58:02.059 --> 00:58:03.215
with those around you.

00:58:03.215 --> 00:58:28.924
♪ theme music ♪