WEBVTT

00:00:10.897 --> 00:00:12.219
I'm fat.

00:00:13.297 --> 00:00:14.427
Wow, I'm fat.

00:00:15.228 --> 00:00:18.967
She's only nineteen years old,
what am I doing with my life?

00:00:19.717 --> 00:00:21.408
Hey! Two likes! Nice.

00:00:21.818 --> 00:00:23.589
Do I like this photo?

00:00:24.016 --> 00:00:26.097
Does she really need more likes?

00:00:26.597 --> 00:00:28.843
I hope I'm going to be invited
to the wedding.

00:00:29.469 --> 00:00:31.254
One more like, nice!

00:00:31.704 --> 00:00:35.914
Welcome to the internal monologue
of a typical social media scroll.

00:00:36.544 --> 00:00:39.390
A monologue that so many
of us have every day,

00:00:39.390 --> 00:00:42.542
but we don't think about it,
we don't talk about it.

00:00:42.542 --> 00:00:45.234
In fact, many of us
can't even recognize it happening.

00:00:46.831 --> 00:00:48.198
I'm Bailey Parnell,

00:00:48.198 --> 00:00:50.658
and I will discuss
the unintended consequences

00:00:50.658 --> 00:00:52.787
social media is having
on your mental health.

00:00:53.296 --> 00:00:55.679
I will show you what's
stressing you out every day,

00:00:55.679 --> 00:00:56.918
what it's doing to you,

00:00:56.918 --> 00:01:00.277
and how you can craft
a better experience for yourself online.

00:01:02.457 --> 00:01:03.857
Just over a year ago,

00:01:03.868 --> 00:01:07.615
my sister and I took a four-day
vacation to Jasper, Alberta.

00:01:08.300 --> 00:01:12.217
This was the first no-work vacation
I had taken in four years.

00:01:12.978 --> 00:01:15.818
On this vacation, I was going dark.

00:01:16.358 --> 00:01:20.868
I was turning on airplane mode,
no email and no social media.

00:01:21.488 --> 00:01:22.809
The first day there,

00:01:22.809 --> 00:01:25.251
I was still experiencing
phantom vibration syndrome.

00:01:25.251 --> 00:01:27.249
That's where you think
your phone went off,

00:01:27.249 --> 00:01:29.008
and you check and it didn't.

00:01:29.008 --> 00:01:30.830
I was checking incessantly.

00:01:30.830 --> 00:01:32.695
I was distracted in conversation.

00:01:32.695 --> 00:01:35.495
I was seeing these gorgeous sights
Jasper had to offer,

00:01:35.505 --> 00:01:37.695
and my first reaction
was to take out my phone

00:01:37.695 --> 00:01:39.167
and post it on social.

00:01:39.167 --> 00:01:41.221
But of course it wasn't there.

00:01:42.090 --> 00:01:44.381
The second day was a little bit easier.

00:01:44.629 --> 00:01:46.518
You might be thinking I'm ridiculous,

00:01:46.518 --> 00:01:50.069
but I hadn't been completely
disconnected in over four years.

00:01:50.783 --> 00:01:53.283
This was practically
a new experience again.

00:01:53.296 --> 00:01:55.335
It wasn't until the fourth day I was there

00:01:55.335 --> 00:01:57.616
that I was finally comfortable
without my phone.

00:01:58.075 --> 00:02:01.314
I was sitting with my sister,
literally on the side of this mountain,

00:02:01.314 --> 00:02:03.264
when I started thinking to myself:

00:02:03.264 --> 00:02:05.745
"What is social media doing to me?

00:02:05.745 --> 00:02:07.679
What is it doing to my peers?"

00:02:07.679 --> 00:02:10.901
That was only four days,
and it was anxiety-inducing,

00:02:10.901 --> 00:02:13.699
it was stressful and it
resulted in withdrawals.

00:02:14.780 --> 00:02:17.139
That's when I started to ask questions

00:02:17.139 --> 00:02:20.057
and have since started
my master's research into this subject.

00:02:21.567 --> 00:02:24.638
I've worked in social marketing
primarily in higher education

00:02:24.638 --> 00:02:26.349
for most of my career.

00:02:26.349 --> 00:02:29.653
That means I work
with a lot of 18- to 24-year-olds,

00:02:30.218 --> 00:02:31.378
which also happens to be

00:02:31.378 --> 00:02:33.889
the most active demographic
on social media.

00:02:34.691 --> 00:02:36.649
The other thing you need to know about me

00:02:36.649 --> 00:02:39.499
is that I'm young enough
to have grown up with social media,

00:02:40.080 --> 00:02:42.881
but just old enough to be able
to critically engage with it

00:02:42.881 --> 00:02:45.440
in a way that twelve-year-old me
probably couldn't.

00:02:45.811 --> 00:02:49.926
My life is social media: personally,
professionally and academically.

00:02:49.926 --> 00:02:53.771
If it was doing this to me,
what was it doing to everyone else?

00:02:55.076 --> 00:02:57.357
I immediately found out I wasn't alone.

00:02:59.532 --> 00:03:03.028
The center for collegiate mental health
found that the top three diagnoses

00:03:03.028 --> 00:03:07.266
on University campuses
are anxiety, depression and stress.

00:03:08.039 --> 00:03:11.768
Numerous studies from the US,
Canada, the UK, you name it,

00:03:11.768 --> 00:03:14.028
have linked this high social media use

00:03:14.028 --> 00:03:16.951
with these high levels
of anxiety and depression.

00:03:17.723 --> 00:03:20.335
But the scary thing
is that high social media use

00:03:20.335 --> 00:03:22.285
is almost everyone I know:

00:03:22.754 --> 00:03:25.295
my friends, my family, my colleagues.

00:03:25.971 --> 00:03:30.161
90% of 18- to 29-year-olds
are on social media.

00:03:31.093 --> 00:03:34.074
We spend on average
two hours a day there.

00:03:34.074 --> 00:03:36.694
We don't even eat for two hours a day.

00:03:37.452 --> 00:03:41.407
70% of the Canadian population
is on social media.

00:03:42.133 --> 00:03:45.001
Our voter turnout isn't even 70%.

00:03:45.362 --> 00:03:49.939
Anything we do this often
is worthy of critical observation.

00:03:49.941 --> 00:03:53.882
Anything we spend this much time doing
has lasting effects on us.

00:03:54.631 --> 00:03:56.161
So let me introduce you

00:03:56.161 --> 00:03:59.432
to four of the most common
stressors on social media,

00:03:59.432 --> 00:04:00.676
that if go unchecked

00:04:00.676 --> 00:04:03.882
have potential to become
full-blown mental health issues,

00:04:03.882 --> 00:04:06.372
and this is by no means
an exhaustive list.

00:04:07.773 --> 00:04:10.122
Number one: the Highlight Reel.

00:04:11.333 --> 00:04:12.727
Just like in sports,

00:04:12.727 --> 00:04:16.484
the highlight reel is a collection
of the best and brightest moments.

00:04:16.964 --> 00:04:19.445
Social media is
our personal highlight reel.

00:04:19.445 --> 00:04:21.934
It's where we put up our wins,
or when we look great,

00:04:21.934 --> 00:04:24.185
or when we are out
with friends and family.

00:04:24.185 --> 00:04:25.983
But we struggle with insecurity

00:04:25.983 --> 00:04:28.339
because we compare
our behind-the-scenes

00:04:28.339 --> 00:04:30.456
with everyone else's highlight reels.

00:04:30.456 --> 00:04:33.172
We are constantly comparing
ourselves to others.

00:04:33.172 --> 00:04:35.742
Yes, this was happening
before social media,

00:04:35.742 --> 00:04:37.582
with TV and celebrity,

00:04:37.582 --> 00:04:41.465
but now it's happening all the time,
and it's directly linked to you.

00:04:42.607 --> 00:04:45.784
A perfect example I came across
in preparation for this talk

00:04:45.784 --> 00:04:48.719
is my friend on vacation: 'brb, nap ...'

00:04:48.719 --> 00:04:50.209
(Laughter)

00:04:50.708 --> 00:04:53.186
'Wait, why can't I afford a vacation?

00:04:53.186 --> 00:04:56.028
Why am I just sitting here
in my PJ's watching Netflix?

00:04:56.028 --> 00:04:57.888
I want to be on a beach.'

00:04:58.818 --> 00:05:01.221
Here's the thing, I know her very well.

00:05:01.517 --> 00:05:03.869
I knew this was
out of the ordinary for her.

00:05:04.200 --> 00:05:06.612
I knew she was typically
drowning in schoolwork.

00:05:06.612 --> 00:05:08.648
But we think, 'Who wants to see that?'

00:05:09.035 --> 00:05:11.277
The highlights are
what people want to see.

00:05:11.278 --> 00:05:13.557
In fact, when your highlights do well,

00:05:13.557 --> 00:05:16.406
you encounter the second
stressor on social media.

00:05:16.787 --> 00:05:20.116
Which is number two: Social Currency.

00:05:21.887 --> 00:05:26.048
Just like the dollar, a currency
is literally something we use

00:05:26.048 --> 00:05:28.214
to attribute value to a good or service.

00:05:29.000 --> 00:05:31.810
In social media, these likes,
the comments, the shares

00:05:31.810 --> 00:05:36.091
have become this form of social currency
by which we attribute value to something.

00:05:36.872 --> 00:05:39.313
In marketing, we call it
the 'Economy of Attention'.

00:05:39.678 --> 00:05:41.698
Everything is competing
for your attention,

00:05:41.698 --> 00:05:45.539
and when you give something a like
or a piece of that finite attention,

00:05:45.539 --> 00:05:48.541
it becomes a recorded transaction
attributing value.

00:05:48.972 --> 00:05:51.960
Which is great if you
are selling albums or clothing.

00:05:52.721 --> 00:05:55.623
The problem is that in our social media,

00:05:55.623 --> 00:05:57.443
[WE are the product.]

00:05:57.443 --> 00:05:59.761
We are letting others
attribute value to us.

00:06:00.560 --> 00:06:03.477
You know someone or are someone
that has taken down a photo

00:06:03.478 --> 00:06:06.370
because it didn't take as many likes
as you thought it would.

00:06:07.068 --> 00:06:09.439
I'll admit, I've been
right there with you.

00:06:09.448 --> 00:06:14.150
We took our product off the shelf
because it wasn't selling fast enough.

00:06:15.099 --> 00:06:17.719
This is changing our sense of identity.

00:06:17.719 --> 00:06:20.559
We are tying up our self-worth
of what others think about us

00:06:20.559 --> 00:06:22.976
and then we are quantifying it
for everyone to see.

00:06:23.780 --> 00:06:25.022
And we are obsessed.

00:06:25.022 --> 00:06:29.533
We have to get that selfie just right,
and we will take 300 photos to make sure.

00:06:30.353 --> 00:06:33.002
Then we will wait
for the perfect time to post.

00:06:35.384 --> 00:06:36.653
We are so obsessed

00:06:36.653 --> 00:06:39.884
we have biological responses
when we can't participate.

00:06:40.813 --> 00:06:43.543
Which leads me to
the third stressor on social media.

00:06:43.983 --> 00:06:46.306
Number three: F.O.M.O.

00:06:46.945 --> 00:06:49.158
It's a light phrase
we've all thrown around.

00:06:49.718 --> 00:06:53.930
F.O.M.O., or the 'fear of missing out',
is an actual social anxiety

00:06:53.930 --> 00:06:56.819
from the fear that you are missing
a potential connection,

00:06:56.819 --> 00:06:58.521
event, or opportunity.

00:06:58.521 --> 00:07:02.369
A collection of Canadian Universities
found that 7/10 students

00:07:02.369 --> 00:07:05.350
said they would get rid of
their social networking accounts

00:07:05.350 --> 00:07:08.324
if it were not for fear
of being left 'out of the loop'.

00:07:08.324 --> 00:07:10.685
Out of curiosity, how many people here

00:07:10.685 --> 00:07:13.595
have, or have considered
deactivating your social.

00:07:14.714 --> 00:07:16.204
That's almost everyone.

00:07:17.701 --> 00:07:21.180
That F.O.M.O. you feel,
the highlight reels, the social currency,

00:07:21.765 --> 00:07:25.949
those are all results of a relatively
'normal' social media experience.

00:07:26.512 --> 00:07:30.052
But what if going on social every day
was a terrifying experience?

00:07:30.052 --> 00:07:32.330
Where you not just
question your self-worth

00:07:32.330 --> 00:07:34.301
but you question your safety?

00:07:34.445 --> 00:07:37.387
Perhaps the worst stressor
on social media is number four:

00:07:37.387 --> 00:07:39.040
Online Harassment.

00:07:40.823 --> 00:07:44.735
40% of online adults
have experienced online harassment.

00:07:45.685 --> 00:07:48.255
73% have witnessed it.

00:07:48.925 --> 00:07:52.502
The unfortunate reality is
that it is much worse and much more likely

00:07:52.504 --> 00:07:55.884
if you are a woman, LGBTQ,
a person of color, muslim -

00:07:55.894 --> 00:07:57.582
I think you get the point.

00:07:58.147 --> 00:08:01.627
The problem is that in the news
we are seeing these big stories:

00:08:02.247 --> 00:08:04.007
The 18-year-old Tyler Clementi,

00:08:04.007 --> 00:08:08.217
who took his life after his roommate
secretly filmed him kissing another guy

00:08:08.217 --> 00:08:09.702
and outed him on Twitter.

00:08:10.618 --> 00:08:14.296
We see women like Anita Sarkeesian
being close to shamed of the internet

00:08:14.296 --> 00:08:17.380
and sent death and rape threats
for sharing their feminism.

00:08:17.380 --> 00:08:20.175
We see these stories once it is too late.

00:08:21.248 --> 00:08:23.764
What about the everyday
online harassment?

00:08:23.764 --> 00:08:26.517
What about that ugly snapchat
you sent your friend

00:08:26.517 --> 00:08:29.897
with the intention of it being private,
and now it is up on Facebook?

00:08:29.901 --> 00:08:32.841
'And so? It's just one photo, it's funny.'

00:08:32.841 --> 00:08:35.318
'Just one mean comment, not a big deal.'

00:08:35.882 --> 00:08:40.172
But when these micro moments
happen over and over again, over time,

00:08:40.172 --> 00:08:42.652
that's when we have a macro problem.

00:08:43.791 --> 00:08:46.363
We have to recognize
these everyday instances as well.

00:08:46.930 --> 00:08:49.568
Because if they go unchecked
and the effects unnoticed,

00:08:49.568 --> 00:08:52.569
we are going to have
many more Tyler Clementis.

00:08:54.040 --> 00:08:56.176
The effects are not always
easy to recognise.

00:08:56.176 --> 00:08:59.787
How many of you have noticed
the notifications at the top of my screen?

00:09:00.269 --> 00:09:03.576
How many of you, like me,
are bothered that they're not checked?

00:09:04.949 --> 00:09:08.950
Ok, let me check them for you.
(Sighs) Okay!

00:09:10.647 --> 00:09:13.644
Just one small example
of what this can do to you.

00:09:13.644 --> 00:09:16.911
Maybe you simply cannot focus
because your notifications

00:09:16.911 --> 00:09:19.700
are going off the handle,
and you need to check.

00:09:20.382 --> 00:09:23.359
That need, eventually becomes addiction.

00:09:24.479 --> 00:09:26.897
Regarding social media,
we are already experiencing

00:09:26.897 --> 00:09:29.064
impairment similar
to substance dependencies.

00:09:29.630 --> 00:09:33.521
With every like, you get a shot
of that feel-good chemical, dopamine.

00:09:33.894 --> 00:09:37.504
You gain more of that social currency.
So what do we do to feel good?

00:09:37.891 --> 00:09:40.436
We check likes - just one more time.

00:09:41.093 --> 00:09:43.192
We post - just one more time.

00:09:44.015 --> 00:09:46.612
We are anxious if we do not have access.

00:09:47.205 --> 00:09:50.014
Doesn't that sound like every drug
you have ever heard of?

00:09:50.639 --> 00:09:51.401
Yeah!

00:09:52.594 --> 00:09:54.054
So when that grows,

00:09:54.054 --> 00:09:56.936
when your social media use
goes unconfronted overtime,

00:09:56.936 --> 00:09:59.890
that's when we see the rising levels
of anxiety and depression:

00:09:59.890 --> 00:10:03.101
the F.O.M.O. the distractions,
the highlight reels, the comparisons;

00:10:03.101 --> 00:10:05.168
It's a lot, and it's all the time!

00:10:06.550 --> 00:10:09.071
The Canadian Association of Mental Health

00:10:09.071 --> 00:10:14.132
found that grades 7-12 students
who spent two hours a day on social media

00:10:14.132 --> 00:10:18.291
reported higher levels of anxiety,
depression and suicidal thoughts.

00:10:19.763 --> 00:10:23.101
For those of you doing the math,
that's as young as twelve years old.

00:10:26.411 --> 00:10:30.946
Here is the thing, 
I like social media. I do, I love it.

00:10:31.413 --> 00:10:32.766
Hearing what I've said today

00:10:32.776 --> 00:10:35.073
might make you think
I want you to get off of it.

00:10:35.073 --> 00:10:36.367
But I don't.

00:10:36.367 --> 00:10:38.370
I don't think it's going anywhere,

00:10:38.370 --> 00:10:39.942
so I'm not going to waste my time

00:10:39.942 --> 00:10:42.698
telling you to spend less time
on social media.

00:10:42.698 --> 00:10:45.757
Frankly, I don't think
absence is an option anymore.

00:10:45.757 --> 00:10:49.074
But that does not mean
you can't practice 'safe social'.

00:10:51.982 --> 00:10:54.289
Everything I have talked about today

00:10:54.289 --> 00:10:57.681
has nothing and everything to do
with social media.

00:10:58.609 --> 00:11:01.681
I mean, social media
is neither good nor bad.

00:11:01.681 --> 00:11:05.028
It's just the most recent tool we use
to do what we have always done:

00:11:05.631 --> 00:11:07.980
tell stories and communicate
with each other.

00:11:08.409 --> 00:11:11.873
You wouldn't blame Samsung Television
for a bad TV show.

00:11:12.603 --> 00:11:15.353
Twitter doesn't make people
write hateful posts.

00:11:16.177 --> 00:11:18.591
When we talk about
this dark side of social media,

00:11:18.591 --> 00:11:21.355
what we really talk about
is the dark side of people.

00:11:21.355 --> 00:11:23.409
That dark side that makes
harassers harass;

00:11:23.409 --> 00:11:25.685
that insecurity that makes you
take down a photo

00:11:25.685 --> 00:11:27.178
you were excited to share.

00:11:27.178 --> 00:11:30.362
That dark side that looks at a picture
of a happy family and wonders

00:11:30.362 --> 00:11:32.702
why yours does not look like that.

00:11:33.501 --> 00:11:38.137
So as parents, as educators,
as friends, as bosses

00:11:38.137 --> 00:11:40.573
this dark side is
what we need to focus on.

00:11:41.470 --> 00:11:45.020
We need preventative strategies
and coping strategies

00:11:45.020 --> 00:11:48.284
so that when you have your low days -
because you will -

00:11:48.284 --> 00:11:52.454
when you're questioning your self-worth,
you never get as low as Tyler Clementi -

00:11:52.842 --> 00:11:54.925
and the many others like him.

00:11:55.876 --> 00:11:58.725
'OK, Bailey, how do you find
social media wellness?'

00:11:59.041 --> 00:12:00.873
Here's the good news:

00:12:00.873 --> 00:12:03.996
Recognising a problem
is the first step to fixing it.

00:12:04.474 --> 00:12:08.229
So hearing this talk is just that,
step one: recognise the problem.

00:12:08.229 --> 00:12:09.809
You know the power of suggestion,

00:12:09.809 --> 00:12:13.349
when someone tells you about something
and you start seeing it everywhere.

00:12:13.349 --> 00:12:15.383
That's why awareness is critical.

00:12:15.383 --> 00:12:18.877
Because now you will at least
be better able to recognise these effects

00:12:18.877 --> 00:12:20.846
if and when they happen to you.

00:12:22.864 --> 00:12:26.389
The second thing you are going to do
is audit your social media diet.

00:12:27.786 --> 00:12:30.102
The same way we monitor
what goes into our mouth,

00:12:30.102 --> 00:12:32.602
monitor whatever goes
into your head and heart.

00:12:32.602 --> 00:12:37.025
Ask yourself: 'Did that Facebook scroll
make me feel better or worse off?'

00:12:37.397 --> 00:12:39.937
'How many times
do I actually check likes?'

00:12:40.266 --> 00:12:42.834
'Why am I responding
this way to that photo?'

00:12:43.117 --> 00:12:45.860
Then ask yourself if you are
happy with the results.

00:12:45.860 --> 00:12:47.927
You might be and that's OK!

00:12:48.322 --> 00:12:51.059
But if you're not, move on to step three.

00:12:51.593 --> 00:12:53.858
Create a better online experience.

00:12:54.556 --> 00:12:56.049
After my partner did his audit,

00:12:56.049 --> 00:12:59.080
he realised his self-worth
was too tied up in social media,

00:12:59.080 --> 00:13:03.163
but particularly celebrities reminding him
of the things he didn't have.

00:13:03.173 --> 00:13:06.219
So he unfollowed all brands
and all celebrities.

00:13:06.535 --> 00:13:08.016
That worked for him.

00:13:08.027 --> 00:13:10.141
But it might not be celebrities for you.

00:13:10.141 --> 00:13:13.051
For me, I had to purge
other people off my timeline.

00:13:13.051 --> 00:13:14.381
Let me tell you a secret.

00:13:14.381 --> 00:13:17.221
You do not have to follow your 'friends'.

00:13:17.679 --> 00:13:19.973
The truth is that sometimes our friends,

00:13:19.973 --> 00:13:23.219
or the people we have
on Facebook as a courtesy,

00:13:23.219 --> 00:13:24.582
they just suck online!

00:13:24.962 --> 00:13:27.936
You find yourself in this
passive-aggressive status war

00:13:27.936 --> 00:13:29.956
you didn't even know was happening.

00:13:29.956 --> 00:13:33.805
Or you are looking at 50 photos
of the same concert from the same angle.

00:13:33.805 --> 00:13:35.685
(Laughter)

00:13:35.685 --> 00:13:39.355
If you want to follow artists,
or comedians, or cats,

00:13:39.355 --> 00:13:40.977
you can do that.

00:13:41.186 --> 00:13:43.737
The last thing you will do
is model good behaviour.

00:13:43.737 --> 00:13:46.787
Offline we are taught not to bully
other kids in the playground.

00:13:46.787 --> 00:13:49.822
We are taught to respect others
and treat them how they deserve.

00:13:49.822 --> 00:13:52.328
We are taught not to kick others
when they are down,

00:13:52.328 --> 00:13:54.120
or take pleasure in their downfalls.

00:13:54.120 --> 00:13:55.771
Social media is a tool.

00:13:55.953 --> 00:13:59.601
A tool that can be used for good,
for more positive groups,

00:13:59.601 --> 00:14:03.448
for revolutions, for putting
grumpy cat in Disney movies.

00:14:03.448 --> 00:14:04.775
(Laughs)

00:14:04.775 --> 00:14:06.464
Internet is a weird place.

00:14:07.099 --> 00:14:09.315
Is social media hurting
your mental health?

00:14:09.325 --> 00:14:11.375
The answer is: it doesn't have to.

00:14:11.758 --> 00:14:15.340
Social can tear you down,
yes, or it can lift you up,

00:14:15.826 --> 00:14:19.485
where you leave feeling better off,
or have an actual laugh-out-loud.

00:14:20.508 --> 00:14:22.463
Finally, I have 24 hours in a day,

00:14:22.463 --> 00:14:25.463
if I spend two of those hours
on social media,

00:14:25.463 --> 00:14:29.987
then I want my experiences to be full
of inspiration, laughs, motivation,

00:14:29.987 --> 00:14:32.854
and a whole lot of grumpy cat
in Disney movies.

00:14:33.689 --> 00:14:34.710
Thank you.

00:14:34.710 --> 00:14:37.260
(Applause)