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It was April, last year.

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I was on an evening out with friends

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to celebrate one of their birthdays.

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We hadn't been all together
for a couple of weeks;

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it was a perfect evening,
as we were all reunited.

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At the end of the evening,

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I caught the last underground train
back to the other side of London.

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The journey was smooth.

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I got back to my local station

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and I began the 10-minute walk home.

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As I turned the corner onto my street,

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my house in sight up ahead,

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I heard footsteps behind me

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that seemed to have
approached out of nowhere

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and were picking up pace.

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Before I had time to process
what was happening,

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a hand was clapped around my mouth
so that I could not breathe,

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and the young man behind me
dragged me to the ground,

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beat my head repeatedly
against the pavement

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until my face began to bleed,

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kicking me in the back and neck

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while he began to assault me,

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ripping off my clothes
and telling me to "shut up,"

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as I struggled to cry for help.

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With each smack of my head
to the concrete ground,

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a question echoed through my mind
that still haunts me today:

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"Is this going to be how it all ends?"

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Little could I have realized,
I'd been followed the whole way

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from the moment I left the station.

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And hours later,

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I was standing topless and barelegged
in front of the police,

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having the cuts and bruises
on my naked body photographed

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for forensic evidence.

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Now, there are few words to describe
the all-consuming feelings

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of vulnerability, shame, upset
and injustice that I was ridden with

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in that moment and for the weeks to come.

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But wanting to find a way
to condense these feelings

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into something ordered
that I could work through,

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I decided to do what
felt most natural to me:

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I wrote about it.

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It started out as a cathartic exercise.

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I wrote a letter to my assaulter,

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humanizing him as "you,"

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to identify him as part
of the very community

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that he had so violently
abused that night.

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Stressing the tidal-wave
effect of his actions,

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I wrote:

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"Did you ever think
of the people in your life?

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I don't know who the people
in your life are.

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I don't know anything about you.

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But I do know this:

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you did not just attack me that night.

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I'm a daughter, I'm a friend,

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I'm a sister, I'm a pupil,

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I'm a cousin, I'm a niece,

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I'm a neighbor;

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I'm the employee
who served everyone coffee

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in the café under the railway.

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And all the people who form
these relations to me

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make up my community.

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And you assaulted
every single one of them.

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You violated the truth that I
will never cease to fight for,

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and which all of these people represent:

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that there are infinitely more
good people in the world than bad."

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But, determined not to let
this one incident make me lose faith

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in the solidarity in my community
or humanity as a whole,

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I recalled the 7/7 terrorist bombings
in July 2005 on London transport,

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and how the mayor of London at the time,
and indeed my own parents,

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had insisted that we all get back
on the tubes the next day,

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so we wouldn't be defined or changed

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by those that had made us feel unsafe.

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I told my attacker,

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"You've carried out your attack,

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but now I'm getting back on my tube.

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My community will not feel we are unsafe
walking home after dark.

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We will get on the last tubes home,

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and we will walk up our streets alone,

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because we will not ingrain
or submit to the idea

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that we are putting ourselves
in danger in doing so.

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We will continue
to come together, like an army,

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when any member
of our community is threatened.

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And this is a fight you will not win."

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At the time of writing this letter --

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(Applause)

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Thank you.

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(Applause)

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At the time of writing this letter,

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I was studying for my exams in Oxford,

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and I was working
on the local student paper there.

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Despite being lucky enough to have
friends and family supporting me,

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it was an isolating time.

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I didn't know anyone
who'd been through this before;

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at least I didn't think I did.

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I'd read news reports, statistics,
and knew how common sexual assault was,

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yet I couldn't actually name
a single person

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that I'd heard speak out
about an experience of this kind before.

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So in a somewhat spontaneous decision,

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I decided that I would publish
my letter in the student paper,

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hoping to reach out to others in Oxford

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that might have had a similar experience
and be feeling the same way.

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At the end of the letter,

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I asked others to write in
with their experiences

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under the hashtag, "#NotGuilty,"

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to emphasize that survivors of assault
could express themselves

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without feeling shame or guilt
about what happened to them --

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to show that we could all
stand up to sexual assault.

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What I never anticipated
is that almost overnight,

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this published letter would go viral.

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Soon, we were receiving
hundreds of stories

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from men and women across the world,

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which we began to publish
on a website I set up.

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And the hashtag became a campaign.

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There was an Australian mother in her 40s
who described how on an evening out,

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she was followed to the bathroom

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by a man who went
to repeatedly grab her crotch.

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There was a man in the Netherlands

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who described how he was date-raped
on a visit to London

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and wasn't taken seriously
by anyone he reported his case to.

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I had personal Facebook messages
from people in India and South America,

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saying, how can we bring
the message of the campaign there?

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One of the first contributions we had
was from a woman called Nikki,

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who described growing up,
being molested my her own father.

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And I had friends open up to me

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about experiences ranging
from those that happened last week

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to those that happened years ago,
that I'd had no idea about.

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And the more we started
to receive these messages,

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the more we also started
to receive messages of hope --

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people feeling empowered
by this community of voices

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standing up to sexual assault
and victim-blaming.

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One woman called Olivia,

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after describing how she was attacked

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by someone she had trusted
and cared about for a long time,

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said, "I've read many
of the stories posted here,

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and I feel hopeful that if so many
women can move forward,

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then I can, too.

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I've been inspired by many,

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and I hope I can be as strong
as them someday.

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I'm sure I will."

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People around the world began
tweeting under this hashtag,

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and the letter was republished
and covered by the national press,

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as well as being translated into several
other languages worldwide.

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But something struck me
about the media attention

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that this letter was attracting.

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For something to be front-page news,

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given the word "news" itself,

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we can assume it must be something new
or something surprising.

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And yet sexual assault
is not something new.

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Sexual assault, along with other
kinds of injustices,

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is reported in the media all the time.

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But through the campaign,

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these injustices were framed
as not just news stories,

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they were firsthand experiences
that had affected real people,

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who were creating,
with the solidarity of others,

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what they needed
and had previously lacked:

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a platform to speak out,

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the reassurance they weren't alone
or to blame for what happened to them

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and open discussions that would help
to reduce stigma around the issue.

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The voices of those directly affected
were at the forefront of the story --

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not the voices of journalists
or commentators on social media.

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And that's why the story was news.

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We live in an incredibly
interconnected world

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with the proliferation of social media,

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which is of course a fantastic resource
for igniting social change.

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But it's also made us
increasingly reactive,

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from the smallest annoyances
of, "Oh, my train's been delayed,"

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to the greatest injustices of war,
genocides, terrorist attacks.

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Our default response has become
to leap to react to any kind of grievance

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by tweeting, Facebooking, hastagging --

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anything to show others
that we, too, have reacted.

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The problem with reacting
in this manner en masse

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is it can sometimes mean
that we don't actually react at all,

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not in the sense of actually
doing anything, anyway.

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It might make ourselves feel better,

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like we've contributed
to a group mourning or outrage,

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but it doesn't actually change anything.

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And what's more,

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it can sometimes drown out the voices

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of those directly
affected by the injustice,

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whose needs must be heard.

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Worrying, too, is the tendency
for some reactions to injustice

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to build even more walls,

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being quick to point fingers
with the hope of providing easy solutions

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to complex problems.

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One British tabloid,
on the publication of my letter,

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branded a headline stating,

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"Oxford Student Launches
Online Campaign to Shame Attacker."

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But the campaign never
meant to shame anyone.

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It meant to let people speak
and to make others listen.

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Divisive Twitter trolls were quick
to create even more injustice,

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commenting on
my attacker's ethnicity or class

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to push their own prejudiced agendas.

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And some even accused me
of feigning the whole thing

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to push, and I quote,

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my "feminist agenda of man-hating."

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(Laughter)

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I know, right?

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As if I'm going to be like,
"Hey guys! Sorry I can't make it,

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I'm busy trying to hate
the entire male population

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by the time I'm 30."

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(Laughter)

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Now, I'm almost sure

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that these people wouldn't say
the things they say in person.

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But it's as if because they might
be behind a screen,

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in the comfort in their own home

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when on social media,

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people forget that what
they're doing is a public act --

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that other people will be reading it
and be affected by it.

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Returning to my analogy
of getting back on our trains,

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another main concern I have
about this noise that escalates

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from our online responses to injustice

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is that it can very easily slip
into portraying us as the affected party,

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which can lead to a sense of defeatism,

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a kind of mental barrier to seeing
any opportunity for positivity or change

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after a negative situation.

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A couple of months
before the campaign started

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or any of this happened to me,

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I went to a TEDx event in Oxford,

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and I saw Zelda la Grange speak,

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00:09:08,545 --> 00:09:10,806
the former private secretary
to Nelson Mandela.

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One of the stories
she told really struck me.

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She spoke of when
Mandela was taken to court

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by the South African Rugby Union

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after he commissioned
an inquiry into sports affairs.

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In the courtroom,

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he went up to the South African
Rugby Union's lawyers,

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shook them by the hand

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and conversed with them,
each in their own language.

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And Zelda wanted to protest,

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saying they had no right to his respect

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after this injustice they had caused him.

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He turned to her and said,

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"You must never allow the enemy
to determine the grounds for battle."

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At the time of hearing these words,

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I didn't really know why
they were so important,

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but I felt they were, and I wrote them
down in a notebook I had on me.

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But I've thought about this line
a lot ever since.

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Revenge, or the expression of hatred

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towards those who have done us injustice

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may feel like a human instinct
in the face of wrong,

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but we need to break out of these cycles

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00:10:01,675 --> 00:10:04,783
if we are to hope to transform
negative events of injustice

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into positive social change.

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00:10:06,906 --> 00:10:08,079
To do otherwise

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continues to let the enemy
determine the grounds for battle,

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creates a binary,

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where we who have suffered
become the affected,

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pitted against them, the perpetrators.

248
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And just like we got back on our tubes,

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we can't let our platforms
for interconnectivity and community

250
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be the places that we settle for defeat.

251
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But I don't want to discourage
a social media response,

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because I owe the development
of the #NotGuilty campaign

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almost entirely to social media.

254
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But I do want to encourage
a more considered approach

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to the way we use it
to respond to injustice.

256
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The start, I think,
is to ask ourselves two things.

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Firstly: Why do I feel this injustice?

258
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In my case, there were
several answers to this.

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Someone had hurt me and those who I loved,

260
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under the assumption they
wouldn't have to be held to account

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or recognize the damage they had caused.

262
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Not only that, but thousands
of men and women suffer every day

263
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from sexual abuse, often in silence,

264
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yet it's still a problem we don't give
the same airtime to as other issues.

265
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It's still an issue many people
blame victims for.

266
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Next, ask yourself: How,
in recognizing these reasons,

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could I go about reversing them?

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With us, this was holding my attacker
to account -- and many others.

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It was calling them out
on the effect they had caused.

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It was giving airtime
to the issue of sexual assault,

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opening up discussions amongst friends,
amongst families, in the media

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that had been closed for too long,

273
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and stressing that victims
shouldn't feel to blame

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for what happened to them.

275
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We might still have a long way to go
in solving this problem entirely.

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But in this way,

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we can begin to use social media
as an active tool for social justice,

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as a tool to educate,
to stimulate dialogues,

279
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to make those in positions
of authority aware of an issue

280
00:11:40,592 --> 00:11:43,113
by listening to those
directly affected by it.

281
00:11:44,112 --> 00:11:48,582
Because sometimes these questions
don't have easy answers.

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00:11:48,606 --> 00:11:50,272
In fact, they rarely do.

283
00:11:50,715 --> 00:11:53,979
But this doesn't mean we still
can't give them a considered response.

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00:11:54,370 --> 00:11:56,574
In situations where
you can't go about thinking

285
00:11:56,598 --> 00:11:58,693
how you'd reverse
this feeling of injustice,

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you can still think,
maybe not what you can do,

287
00:12:01,395 --> 00:12:02,944
but what you can not do.

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00:12:03,681 --> 00:12:07,373
You can not build further walls
by fighting injustice with more prejudice,

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more hatred.

290
00:12:08,894 --> 00:12:12,736
You can not speak over those
directly affected by an injustice.

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00:12:13,121 --> 00:12:17,100
And you can not react to injustice,
only to forget about it the next day,

292
00:12:17,124 --> 00:12:19,432
just because the rest
of Twitter has moved on.

293
00:12:20,078 --> 00:12:24,265
Sometimes not reacting
instantly is, ironically,

294
00:12:24,289 --> 00:12:26,683
the best immediate course
of action we can take.

295
00:12:27,919 --> 00:12:31,729
Because we might be angry, upset
and energized by injustice,

296
00:12:32,219 --> 00:12:34,522
but let's consider our responses.

297
00:12:35,413 --> 00:12:38,649
Let us hold people to account,
without descending into a culture

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00:12:38,673 --> 00:12:41,459
that thrives off shaming
and injustice ourselves.

299
00:12:42,345 --> 00:12:43,992
Let us remember that distinction,

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00:12:44,016 --> 00:12:46,214
so often forgotten by internet users,

301
00:12:46,238 --> 00:12:48,678
between criticism and insult.

302
00:12:49,330 --> 00:12:51,346
Let us not forget
to think before we speak,

303
00:12:51,370 --> 00:12:53,787
just because we might
have a screen in front of us.

304
00:12:53,811 --> 00:12:55,782
And when we create noise on social media,

305
00:12:55,806 --> 00:12:58,124
let it not drown out the needs
of those affected,

306
00:12:58,148 --> 00:13:00,589
but instead let it amplify their voices,

307
00:13:00,613 --> 00:13:03,555
so the internet becomes a place
where you're not the exception

308
00:13:03,579 --> 00:13:06,747
if you speak out about something
that has actually happened to you.

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00:13:06,771 --> 00:13:08,824
All these considered
approaches to injustice

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00:13:08,848 --> 00:13:11,544
evoke the very keystones
on which the internet was built:

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00:13:12,317 --> 00:13:14,572
to network, to have signal, to connect --

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00:13:14,596 --> 00:13:17,088
all these terms that imply
bringing people together,

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00:13:17,112 --> 00:13:18,335
not pushing people apart.

314
00:13:19,443 --> 00:13:23,165
Because if you look up the word
"justice" in the dictionary,

315
00:13:23,977 --> 00:13:25,243
before punishment,

316
00:13:25,267 --> 00:13:28,543
before administration of law
or judicial authority,

317
00:13:29,529 --> 00:13:30,775
you get:

318
00:13:30,799 --> 00:13:32,911
"The maintenance of what is right."

319
00:13:33,794 --> 00:13:37,560
And I think there are few things
more "right" in this world

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00:13:37,584 --> 00:13:39,320
than bringing people together,

321
00:13:39,344 --> 00:13:40,646
than unions.

322
00:13:41,395 --> 00:13:43,892
And if we allow social media
to deliver that,

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00:13:43,916 --> 00:13:47,854
then it can deliver a very powerful
form of justice, indeed.

324
00:13:48,477 --> 00:13:49,706
Thank you very much.

325
00:13:49,730 --> 00:13:56,615
(Applause)