[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:15.77,0:00:21.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,20 years ago, my life took on\Na wholly unexpected direction.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:21.89,0:00:26.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was sat watching television\Nwith my then four-year-old son.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:27.49,0:00:30.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And he said he needed \Nto tell me something.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:30.62,0:00:33.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I said, "Fine, yeah, what is it?"
Dialogue: 0,0:00:34.26,0:00:35.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And he turned to me and he said,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:35.84,0:00:40.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Mommy, God's made a mistake,\Nand I should've been a girl."
Dialogue: 0,0:00:43.20,0:00:45.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was terrified,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:46.12,0:00:52.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but also, it explained so many things,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:52.15,0:00:54.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so many things.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:54.03,0:00:58.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But a bit like Monopoly, I jumped \Nstraight from fear straight into denial
Dialogue: 0,0:00:59.10,0:01:05.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and told Jack that it was fine \Nto be a boy and like girly things,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:05.59,0:01:08.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but that didn't make him a girl,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:09.34,0:01:12.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and he looked at me,\Nand he dropped his eyes,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:13.40,0:01:16.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and he didn't say anything \Nelse that day anyway.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:17.60,0:01:21.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So what I want to do is walk\Nyou through the process
Dialogue: 0,0:01:21.51,0:01:26.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that has filled the last 24 years\Nof both my life and my child's life
Dialogue: 0,0:01:26.07,0:01:28.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and hopefully explain our journey.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:30.49,0:01:33.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So from Jack to Jackie.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:33.26,0:01:35.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So how did this eight-pound baby "boy" -
Dialogue: 0,0:01:35.69,0:01:37.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and, by the way she hates this picture,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:37.56,0:01:40.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,she says it makes her look\Nlike a member of The Village People -
Dialogue: 0,0:01:40.56,0:01:41.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:01:41.56,0:01:46.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,turn into this 24-year-old young woman?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:46.35,0:01:49.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She likes this picture;\Nshe says it makes her look hot.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:50.56,0:01:54.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, Jack was my first child.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:54.50,0:01:57.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I thought I knew what to expect,\Nbut really I started to notice
Dialogue: 0,0:01:57.93,0:02:02.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that as soon as he got mobile\Nand could express himself,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:02.80,0:02:04.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he was gravitating towards things
Dialogue: 0,0:02:04.44,0:02:06.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that you would see\Nas stereotypically female.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:07.16,0:02:08.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I wasn't bothered.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:08.65,0:02:11.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That didn't, you know,\Nthat didn't faze me at all.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:11.13,0:02:12.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,As far as I was concerned,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:12.41,0:02:15.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,children should be allowed to play\Nwith whatever they want,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:15.16,0:02:17.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,even if it doesn't fit this norm.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:18.75,0:02:22.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And at the childminder's\Nwhen I went back to work,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:22.81,0:02:25.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jack's favorite outfits\Nwere the tutu and Snow White costume.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:26.50,0:02:28.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And again, that was fine.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:30.72,0:02:32.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But not for Dad.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:32.97,0:02:36.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, Jackie's dad struggled,\Nand he blamed me.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:37.53,0:02:43.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,His thoughts were that because I allowed \Nthe Polly Pocket and the My Little Pony,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:43.30,0:02:46.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that I was facilitating and encouraging.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:46.100,0:02:49.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I disagreed. And it caused tensions.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:52.23,0:02:54.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What I had come to the conclusion with,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:54.50,0:02:56.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,over the sort of years\Nuntil she was about two,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:56.96,0:03:01.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was that I had a very sensitive,\Nquite effeminate little boy
Dialogue: 0,0:03:01.03,0:03:02.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who was probably gay.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:03.25,0:03:07.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But Jack's dad did not approve\Nof our child's effeminate behavior,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:08.07,0:03:11.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and it created such tensions \Nthat we ended up in couple's counseling.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:12.14,0:03:13.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We went to couple's counseling,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:13.76,0:03:17.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and what they said to us\Nas parents that we had to agree,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:17.37,0:03:20.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,no matter what it was\Nthat we agreed upon we had to agree.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:21.52,0:03:26.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,At that point, Tim decided\Nthat I must agree with him, apparently,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:26.52,0:03:31.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then all the "girl toys" \Nor "girly toys" as such
Dialogue: 0,0:03:31.38,0:03:33.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,were taken away and put away,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:33.06,0:03:35.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and Jack was made aware\Nthat this was not appropriate.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:36.24,0:03:40.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And suddenly, a confident,\Nhappy little boy
Dialogue: 0,0:03:40.72,0:03:44.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,became quite quiet, withdrawn,\Nvery clingy, and tearful.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:45.52,0:03:48.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I didn't like it,\Nand I didn't think it was right.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:48.18,0:03:51.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And really for me, the point\Nat which I really put my foot down
Dialogue: 0,0:03:51.75,0:03:55.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was about a few weeks later, I think,\Nand my mom phoned me
Dialogue: 0,0:03:55.23,0:03:57.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and said, "What's going on with Jack?"
Dialogue: 0,0:03:57.03,0:03:58.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I said "What do you mean?"
Dialogue: 0,0:03:58.46,0:04:01.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She said, "Well, I phoned\Na couple of days ago
Dialogue: 0,0:04:01.03,0:04:03.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to ask what Jack wanted for Christmas,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:03.11,0:04:05.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and he took the phone\Nout of the room, and he said,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:05.76,0:04:10.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'Can you buy me Barbie Rapunzel?\Nbut can you please hide it
Dialogue: 0,0:04:10.38,0:04:13.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because if Mommy and Daddy find it,\Nthey're going to take it away'"
Dialogue: 0,0:04:14.26,0:04:18.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I realized that I was shaming\Nmy child and their toy choices,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:18.97,0:04:21.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the toy embargo stopped.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:23.92,0:04:25.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I went to my GP
Dialogue: 0,0:04:25.94,0:04:28.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because I was lost,\Nand I did not know what to do.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:29.28,0:04:31.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And she raised her eyebrows, and she said,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:31.49,0:04:33.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Oh, that's interesting."
Dialogue: 0,0:04:33.41,0:04:37.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Which wasn't really very helpful,\Nbecause I was hoping for some direction.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:37.34,0:04:38.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then, she wasn't the first,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:38.82,0:04:40.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and she certainly\Nwouldn't be the last person
Dialogue: 0,0:04:40.93,0:04:43.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to tell me that it was a phase -
Dialogue: 0,0:04:44.29,0:04:46.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's quite a long one, by now, \Nwouldn't you say? -
Dialogue: 0,0:04:47.65,0:04:49.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and that she would grow out of it.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:50.86,0:04:52.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But she didn't.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:52.27,0:04:54.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And what happened\Nwas she kept reiterating,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:54.39,0:04:57.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I'm a girl, I'm a girl,\NI'm really a girl."
Dialogue: 0,0:04:57.28,0:05:00.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Six years old, she asked me\Nwhen she could have the operation
Dialogue: 0,0:05:00.38,0:05:01.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to make her a girl.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:02.71,0:05:06.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And it was really hard for me as a parent\Nto watch the devastation when I told her
Dialogue: 0,0:05:06.100,0:05:09.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that she had to wait\Nuntil she was a grown-up
Dialogue: 0,0:05:09.75,0:05:11.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,before that could happen.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:12.40,0:05:15.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What that identified for me\Nis that I had to do something,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:15.72,0:05:19.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I couldn't keep ignoring this\Nand pretending it wasn't happening.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:19.58,0:05:21.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And so I did some internet searches.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:22.29,0:05:26.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I put in "My son wants to be a girl."
Dialogue: 0,0:05:26.87,0:05:29.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And it came out\Nwith a number of different sites,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:29.16,0:05:33.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but I think about tenth on the listing\Nwas a site called "Mermaids."
Dialogue: 0,0:05:34.40,0:05:36.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I clicked on that,\Nand there was a phone number.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:37.30,0:05:40.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I made a really\Nquite pivotal call for me,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:40.79,0:05:41.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I spoke to Lynn,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:41.89,0:05:44.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who was a founder member\Nof Mermaids, the charity.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:45.04,0:05:47.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think I cried through\Nthe entire conversation
Dialogue: 0,0:05:47.75,0:05:50.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because it was such a relief\Nto finally talk to somebody
Dialogue: 0,0:05:50.80,0:05:53.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who understood what I was going through,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:53.81,0:05:57.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and to point to similarities\Nregarding their children and my child.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:58.35,0:05:59.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It gave me hope.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:00.91,0:06:03.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,At seven years old, Jackie\Nwas referred to Tavistock,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:03.38,0:06:04.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which is the NH's clinic
Dialogue: 0,0:06:04.53,0:06:07.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that supports children and young people \Nwith gender dysphoria
Dialogue: 0,0:06:08.00,0:06:10.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and received a diagnosis\Nof gender dysphoria.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:10.96,0:06:13.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, really? Not a big surprise.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:14.06,0:06:19.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And at eight years old, unfortunately,\Nher dad and I separated.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:22.09,0:06:24.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But what this did for me\Nwas gave me much more freedom
Dialogue: 0,0:06:24.92,0:06:27.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to be able to give Jackie expression.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:29.50,0:06:34.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Tavistock said that allowing her\Ngirl clothes in the house was helpful,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:34.31,0:06:38.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and said that she needed to remain\Nin male persona outside of the home,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:38.75,0:06:40.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and that was fine.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:40.43,0:06:44.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I remember our first\Nshopping trip for girl clothes.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:44.36,0:06:47.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And we went into the store, and I said,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:47.19,0:06:49.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"OK, so over there, \Nthere's the girl clothes.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:49.40,0:06:52.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You can go and get a couple things,\Nanything you like.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:52.07,0:06:54.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And the look on her face\Nwas indescribable.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:54.19,0:06:55.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She was so happy.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:56.15,0:06:57.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And she went pelting off,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:57.94,0:07:00.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and she came back\Nabout two minutes later,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:00.93,0:07:03.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and she had two dresses\N- she couldn't decide.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:03.26,0:07:07.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And she was holding them up,\Nand she was just beaming,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:07.44,0:07:08.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and she was just like,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:08.64,0:07:11.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Which one? Do you like\Nthis one best or this one best?"
Dialogue: 0,0:07:11.32,0:07:12.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and doing a twirl.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:13.84,0:07:15.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I just thought to myself,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:15.24,0:07:18.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Oh my goodness,\Nis somebody watching me now,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:18.44,0:07:22.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,thinking 'this mother with this little boy\Nwith dresses, what is she doing?'"
Dialogue: 0,0:07:23.19,0:07:26.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then I looked back\Nat my child in front of me,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:26.44,0:07:28.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I looked at her face and I thought,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:28.65,0:07:32.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"You know something,\NI can't care about what strangers think.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:32.53,0:07:36.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The most important person to me \Nis right there in front of me right now."
Dialogue: 0,0:07:37.79,0:07:40.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,At 10 years old, we went on holiday.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:40.50,0:07:44.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So we had three weeks\Nwhere Jackie lived as Jackie -
Dialogue: 0,0:07:44.63,0:07:47.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,girl pronouns, girl names,\Ngirl clothes for the entire time.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:48.50,0:07:50.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And what that really pointed out to me
Dialogue: 0,0:07:50.58,0:07:55.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was how much lighter, how much happier,\Nhow much more cheerful my kid was,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:55.09,0:07:57.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,just like, literally,\Nfrom getting up to going to bed,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:57.68,0:07:58.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and it was at that point
Dialogue: 0,0:07:58.87,0:08:02.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I decided that actually forcing my child\Nto live as a boy in school
Dialogue: 0,0:08:02.49,0:08:05.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was the wrong thing\Nbecause I was sending her that message
Dialogue: 0,0:08:05.87,0:08:10.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that somehow wanting and needing\Nto be a girl and express herself as a girl
Dialogue: 0,0:08:10.64,0:08:15.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was shameful - that it was\Nsomething to be hidden, secret.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:16.58,0:08:21.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So the last year of primary school\Nwas her absolute best year of school ever.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:21.74,0:08:24.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So she grew her hair,\Nshe wore the girls' school uniform,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:24.98,0:08:27.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and school said that they noticed\Nan entirely different child
Dialogue: 0,0:08:27.100,0:08:29.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,from the one from the previous year.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:30.07,0:08:31.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And the kids were amazing!
Dialogue: 0,0:08:31.52,0:08:33.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I remember the headteacher saying to me
Dialogue: 0,0:08:33.39,0:08:36.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that she'd overheard a conversation\Nbetween two of the little girls
Dialogue: 0,0:08:36.55,0:08:38.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and one girl said to the other,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:38.19,0:08:42.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Why is Jack growing his hair\Nand wearing girl clothes?"
Dialogue: 0,0:08:42.56,0:08:43.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And the other girl went,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:43.78,0:08:48.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Oh, didn't you know?\NHe's got a girl brain in a boy body."
Dialogue: 0,0:08:48.71,0:08:50.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:08:50.71,0:08:54.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And the other little girl went, "Oh, OK."
Dialogue: 0,0:08:54.15,0:08:55.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:08:56.06,0:08:57.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And that was it.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:58.58,0:09:02.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Unfortunately, some of the parents\Nweren't quite so open-minded,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:02.42,0:09:05.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and we had to get the police involved\Nwhen we had a mother,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:05.19,0:09:08.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when she was collecting her own child,\Nwho is about the same age as Jackie,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:08.95,0:09:11.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,leaning out of the window of her car\Nand shouting abuse
Dialogue: 0,0:09:11.59,0:09:14.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,at my 10-year-old daughter\Nwalking home from school.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:15.72,0:09:18.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,By this time, Tim had come around.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:18.86,0:09:22.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He had seen more and more that this\Nwasn't something that was a choice,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:22.20,0:09:24.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this was just a part\Nof who our daughter was,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:25.67,0:09:31.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and he was now supporting, and frankly,\Nshe wraps him around her little finger.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:32.86,0:09:35.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But we were now preparing\Nfor secondary school,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:35.54,0:09:38.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the Tavistock\Nwere fully onboard and helping,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:38.15,0:09:40.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but from the minute\Nshe walked in the door,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:40.15,0:09:42.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,she was annihilated.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:42.32,0:09:44.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Absolutely annihilated.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:45.05,0:09:48.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And within two weeks,\Nshe took her first overdose.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:52.14,0:09:55.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I spent the next three years\Non suicide watch.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:56.10,0:09:57.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I look back,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:57.44,0:10:01.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I don't know how I got through that,\Nbut I don't know how she did either.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:03.02,0:10:05.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,To add to all of this, puberty.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:07.29,0:10:12.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So at twelve years old,\Nshe started going through a male puberty,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:12.78,0:10:14.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and it was horrific.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:14.13,0:10:15.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She began cutting herself.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:16.74,0:10:19.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And we were absolutely desperate
Dialogue: 0,0:10:19.57,0:10:22.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and faced with an NHS at that time -
Dialogue: 0,0:10:22.16,0:10:23.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's different now -
Dialogue: 0,0:10:23.69,0:10:26.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who wouldn't prescribe\Nany medications to pause puberty,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:26.78,0:10:30.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,no matter how badly\Na child reacted to those stages.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:31.44,0:10:35.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I went back into research mode,\Nand I found a doctor in America
Dialogue: 0,0:10:35.93,0:10:38.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who was working with children\Nwith gender dysphoria,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:38.75,0:10:42.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and who would prescribe \Ntotally reversible blocking medication
Dialogue: 0,0:10:42.01,0:10:44.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that pauses puberty.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:44.16,0:10:46.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If taken away, puberty resumes,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:46.29,0:10:51.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but it gives children like my daughter\Nthe time and space to live and be,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:51.08,0:10:53.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,without their bodies changing.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:53.01,0:10:57.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I know he looks like Indiana Jones,\Nbut he really is a proper-proper doctor.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:58.19,0:11:02.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And he's Dr. Norman Spack, and he works\Nat the Boston Children's Hospital,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:02.16,0:11:05.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and he is a world-renowned expert,\Nand he saved my daughter's life.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:05.97,0:11:08.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I have no doubt about that whatsoever.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:09.54,0:11:12.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In the midst of all of this,\Nschool was up and down.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:12.84,0:11:16.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Eventually we found her a school where\Nshe went to school eight miles from home,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:16.77,0:11:19.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and nobody knew her\Nas anything other than Jackie,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:19.14,0:11:20.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and that sort of settled down.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:20.65,0:11:24.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But the effect on her education,\Non her life, was profound.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:26.46,0:11:30.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She had had seven overdoses\Nin three years,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:30.90,0:11:34.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,all related to transphobic\Nabuse and attacks.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:35.07,0:11:37.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And one of her best friends
Dialogue: 0,0:11:37.26,0:11:39.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was the hate crimes coordinator\Nfrom West Leeds,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:39.84,0:11:44.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so it might give you a bit\Nof an indication of what she went through.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:44.49,0:11:49.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But at 16, my daughter\Nunderwent gender reassignment surgery.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:50.85,0:11:53.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And now, the next bit,\NI'm going to let her talk to you.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:53.78,0:11:55.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Video) (Music)
Dialogue: 0,0:11:56.25,0:12:02.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was born in the body of a boy,\Nbut I had the mind or the brain of a girl.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:02.74,0:12:05.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think I was five years old\Nwhen I said to my mother, like,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:05.66,0:12:08.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"God made a mistake, I shouldn't -\NThis isn't me. I'm wrong."
Dialogue: 0,0:12:09.30,0:12:12.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think I was like seven\Nwhen I started growing my hair,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:12.99,0:12:15.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I started to wear the girls' uniform.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:15.82,0:12:20.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My school itself, they were really,\Nreally good about it, really helpful,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:20.70,0:12:22.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and so were a lot of the students.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:23.21,0:12:27.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If anything, like, I found\Nsome parents were not as accepting.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:27.84,0:12:30.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was walking out\Nof the school gate to go home,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:30.60,0:12:34.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and for a good two,\Nthree weeks consecutively,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:34.22,0:12:39.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,she would like hang out of her car window,\Nand shout abuse at me, this mother.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:39.32,0:12:42.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I could feel, like, hate.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:43.98,0:12:47.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then I got into high school,\Nwhich was a nightmare.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:48.42,0:12:52.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The story of me spread like wildfire.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:52.51,0:12:58.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My first day, like the first day \Nin school, into my high school,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:59.56,0:13:03.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was in my "form" group,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:03.18,0:13:08.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and some kid who I'd never met\Nopened the door to my form room
Dialogue: 0,0:13:08.61,0:13:12.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and he was just like,\N"Oh, is that freak in here? That freak."
Dialogue: 0,0:13:13.30,0:13:17.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I got spat on, and I got beat up,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:17.59,0:13:24.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and it really does hurt to think back\Nat how cruel people could be.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:24.43,0:13:27.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I find it quite empowering\Nthat I've gotten through it.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:27.02,0:13:28.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then I got ask to Miss England
Dialogue: 0,0:13:28.72,0:13:33.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I was like "I must be actually ...\Nattractive? Oh my God!"
Dialogue: 0,0:13:34.07,0:13:37.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It gave me a real boost that I needed.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:37.51,0:13:40.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's part of my story,\Nbut it isn't my whole story,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:41.18,0:13:46.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because, as I said,\NI'm a sister, a singer, actress, model,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:46.75,0:13:50.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,all kind of things\Nbefore I am a "trans person."
Dialogue: 0,0:13:51.02,0:13:52.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I hate that, like why do I need a label?
Dialogue: 0,0:13:52.98,0:13:54.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Why can't I just be a woman?
Dialogue: 0,0:13:54.60,0:13:57.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Everyone has the right to live\Ntheir life how they want to
Dialogue: 0,0:13:57.62,0:14:01.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and be who they want to be,\Nso why is it different for me?
Dialogue: 0,0:14:01.52,0:14:03.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm proud of everything I've gone through,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:03.62,0:14:06.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I wouldn't change it now.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:06.35,0:14:11.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's part of my makeup. It's in my DNA.\NI'm a girl and I always have been.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:11.91,0:14:14.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(End of music) (End of video)
Dialogue: 0,0:14:14.24,0:14:18.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I can't watch that, I have to look down,\Nbecause it still affects me.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:18.96,0:14:20.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm now CEO of Mermaids,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:20.51,0:14:23.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so I'm running the charity\NI contacted so many years ago.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:23.50,0:14:27.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This gives a little bit of an indication\Nof the demand, and how it's rising,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:27.66,0:14:31.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and what we are facing,\Nin terms of young people coming foward.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:31.43,0:14:34.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And the good thing is that parents\Nare now listening as well.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:34.65,0:14:36.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But you can see the difference.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:36.85,0:14:39.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Society maybe is becoming more accepting
Dialogue: 0,0:14:39.21,0:14:42.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,at the same time children \Nand young people across the country
Dialogue: 0,0:14:42.16,0:14:45.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,are still being treated like Jackie was.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:46.69,0:14:49.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is from a 2017 Stonewall survey.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:50.97,0:14:53.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,51% of trans children are bullied.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:53.74,0:14:56.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,One in 10 receive death threats.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:56.33,0:15:00.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,84% self-harm compared\Nto 10% of the population.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:00.52,0:15:03.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And 45% of them attempt\Nsuicide at least once.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:04.76,0:15:07.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Being transgender\Nis not a mental health illness,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:07.64,0:15:11.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but society's prejudice,\Ndiscrimination, and hatred
Dialogue: 0,0:15:11.68,0:15:14.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,lead to anxiety and depression.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:16.50,0:15:20.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now, this is her now.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:22.55,0:15:26.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And you can see, she's maybe\Na little bit of a diva as well,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:26.33,0:15:28.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't know where she gets that from.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:28.74,0:15:31.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Bottom line is she's happy.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:32.49,0:15:34.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And isn't that all that matters?
Dialogue: 0,0:15:34.97,0:15:36.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thank you very much.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:36.71,0:15:39.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause)