Thats your fault!!
getting crap all day from the managers (laughter)
Like fire alarms, everything they do
Fire Extinguishers kind of fire
Oh my God this place has been broken into
It was grim! This bitch is on her own in a haunted warehouse
Toxic as shit!
(Intro music playing)
(Gibberish) It makes me feel beautiful!
(Laughter)
Oh my God girl, it’s been tight
How this ring light is working? I don’t
even know because my niece, she
tripped up on it. Sent it! She might as
well have yeated it across the room
Sent it away for seven working days
Catipulted into the wall and it’s still alive
I don’t know what the lighting is like
in here, but I’ve got the curtains open at
the moment
I don’t know whether I’m going to shut
the curtains and get some lighting in here
I don’t know. So the lighting might change
throughout the video. I have no idea no
idea what to do, don’t know what to do
I can do it
moments before I started filming I had
a gulp of coughing
another reason I am still shocked that I
am still alive. I literally take a gulp of
coffee while I’m doing
my makeup. Dilly me!
I was about to sneeze but I
was mid-swallow
So I panicked and tried
to swallow. I still got coffee up
my nose!
What’s up and welcome to my channel
If you’ve never been here before please
make sure you subscribe right down there
And press on that bell so you know when
I next do a video
This video is going to be so
hard to do. Oh my God!
My mates have been begging
and dying for me to do this video
I was supposed to have a little audience
here but they’ve not arrived yet
Oh my God girl! This is so hard talk about
(Effect runs across screen)
Retail. Working in retail.
This girl has had her fair share
plenty of experience working in retail
quick disclaimer
this is not a video to go and get
out at the managers nor the customers
this is just about experiences that I have
endured while working in retail
though they might not work there
anymore or shop there anymore
why do I feel so nervous to do this
I’ve recently just left one of those jobs
that was toxic as all shit
working in retail in the UK
before anyone starts to work in retail
people forget to advise you about the
following: customers have no filter.
whatsoever!
they have no filter
nor common sense
not a percent of decent humanity
or compassion
managers think they rule the mini kingdom
we got the shoplifters
we’ve got the karens
we’ve got all of them
the wise people that have
worked in retail in the past
that have survived
never share their experiences and wisdom
this is going to be episode one because
I have got like eight notebooks of all
the weird shit I have experienced working
multiple stores. I’m even considering
writing a book but
this girl doesn’t want her ass sued just
yet. We’re just going to dive right in
(squeals and laughs)
I’m going to kick off this video with one
of the most funniest fucking situations
so this was about the job that I recently
left. My mates will even tell you
I don’t use my brain, ever
they’re shocked that I’m still alive
this is like one of the examples
when you watch like a horror movie and
your friend or your relative sits there
next to you and goes
”oh if that happened to me, if I got
broken into, I would punch them in
the face”
and then when a sort of situation like
this happens to you, you turn
like a deer in the headlights
I had to close down with one of
the, two of the managers
he’s no longer in the store anymore
he no longer works for the company
this was hilarious
so, I was closing up with this
manager, so I’m going to call him Taylor
for some weird reason
It’s me, muggin
did the closing up and the cashing up with
the manager
99% of my shifts and it was a bitch
I hated it
you know when you’re just like for
God sakes I just want
to go home
and especially when something goes wrong
when cashing out
there’s something missing in the
Flow. You can’t go home until
it’s done or when the alarm doesn’t
set itself properly and it just makes
you want to cry
you just want to go home
back to motherland
sitting in meudi
Watching Scream
Just recovering from the trauma that
I went through that day
we were cashing up
everything was going spiffingly well.
Taylor if you’re laughing
you’re going to hell
me, muggins, end up having to cash up
almost every single night of the
week. To set the scene, we’re
in the office right everything’s going
spiffingly well. So then Taylor goes “you
know what would make life a
lot easier?”
You know me, I want to get out as quick
as I can is it going to get us out
quicker? he gave me both out cards
and said “clock us both out, I’ll be
turning on the alarm system
and then we can meet in the middle
and then exit the store
Brilliant!
So this was a supermarket
Oh yeah it was haunted as all are
you know dead people and ghosts
like me got a lot of uh story times to
tell you about that one
set back the scene, I clock uh…
it’s already eerie
when you are in a supermarket
and the lights are really dim that
it’s almost dark, it’s very eerie
this place was haunted as all are
we knew there was going to be a delivery
coming in but normally a delivery guy
would unlock the door from the outside
himself, in the delivery, and leave
in, late in the evening, right about
tenish to elevenish
well more like canter down the aisles
to get to the back room because
I was too fucking scared to walk
around in the shop floor
that’s haunted as all ass
eerie as hell, it’s like 10 pm
so picture this, when you’re clocking
in and clocking out
you’re on a system against the wall
so on the wall behind you is the fire exit
door and the door where the deliveries
come through (laughs)
normally the delivery man never got there
until way after that we left
he forgot to give the shop the memo
to say that he was coming a little earlIer
didn’t give us a tip
nay nay
gosh shit like this has to happen to me
so I’m clocking us out facing the back
wall in this retail park there’s a lot of
um shoplifting, raids, clocking out
La-df-da ing
going as quick as I can and
then I hear this BOOM in the milisecond
when you’re in that sort of situation
you’re in an eerie large store that’s
very dark
and the warehouse is haunted as all ass
already a millisecond thinking “okay,
the ghost has thrown a box”
happened quite often in this store
I hear the back door boom open
remember when I said to you if you was
in a horror movie and some broke into
your house like a crazy murderer broke
into your house what would you do
you get that “oh I’ll get a bat and
hit him on the head” “ oh I’ll find the
sulfuric acid in the kitchen somewhere and
throw it in their face”
“oh I throw a hammer at their head”
no, for that millisecond I thought “shit, someone has broken in”
I was triple the size at this time, so this
bitch couldn’t run fast enough
(laughs)
not even a half a milliseconds I’m
thinking oh my god this place has been
broken into
this bitch is on her own in the haunted
warehouse, doors wide open, someone
will break in and murder me
a million ideas and a million scenarios
were flying through my head
come to the part of the self-defense
mechanis my back is planted
against this system (laughs)
my first instinct was to put my hand
behind… oh my God… everyone thought
this shit was so funny they watched
the footage from the CC TV footage
over and over again cause they thought
it was hilarious not funny
cause I couldn’t see who was at the door
because he’d opened the door
gone behind the door to get the brick to
keep the door open
this bitch she’s keeping her back planted
against this system my hands are like
this like trying to find something lob
and launch at this person
i find something in my hand but at the
same time when this situation happens
to you you don’t think
was it a hammer? No
without even half a split second
quarter of a fraction inch of a second
thought this must be the delivery guy
I thought I was gonna get murdered
So I (laughs) long yeeted across the
warehouse (laughs)
this is one golden Chloe moment
This is just one of the reasons that
I would not survive if I had
a murderer encountment
thing in my hand that I yeeted across
the warehouse (laughs)
was a roll of sellotape (laughs)
let that sink in let that sink in
I don’t talk about this often because
it makes me feel so silly
my eyes were facing the floor
not a good position to be before
running away from some sort of
mass murderer but alas it was not
a mass murderer nor a burglar
it was the delivery man it was the
delivery man a very confused
very offended (laughs)
scared delivery man he just
boomed out “oi calm down love!”
the roll of sellotape was right at his
feet I literally end up knees down
to the floor with relief
why didn’t you knock why didn’t
you tell the manager that you were coming
rude! Embarrassingly tail between my legs
waltz back to the office
I’ve got a very confused manager
going “where have you been?”
but when he found out how I reacted to
this situation of my near death experience
thought it was A star fucking hilarious
so I was off for a couple of days after
that after that embarrassing encounter I
come back and we close up together again
goes “oh, I remembered to look at the
footage. Do you know how fucking hilarious
it was to watch that?”
not only me and the manager saw that
footage, a large amount of people saw that
footage I felt more of an idiot than I
already do I’m not gonna lie it was
hilariously funny but at the time there
was a lot of break-ins and a lot of like
shoplifting, burglaries around the area
at that time I was like a little bit on
edge I was at the ready tape in hand
at the ready I never thought my eyes
could go as wide as they did
we watch the footage and he zoomed in at
least like 80 times my eyes were like
this (gestures large circles with hands)
Fuck you roll of tape
not gonna lie that was not funny
it wasn’t funny at the time but it’s now
hilarious and slightly worrying because if
anything like that happened to me
I would be in hot poo poo
oh God I mean it could have been anything
it could have been a stapler it could have
been anything no I had to get a bloody
role of tape as if that bitch was
gonna save my life but a little bit after
That I kind of decided not to do the
Closing up anymore it wasn’t that that
put me off, it was the ghosts actually
this is another story that just literally
Popped into my head so this is when
I worked in Mark’s an Spencer’s
back when I was like part-time modeling
because I was in college at the time
I think I was there for quite a while
that’s all I remember
I remember a lot of the experiences
but one of these experiences
was pretty grim you know when these
retail companies they say how much they
respect and look after their employees
umm I don’t want to be sued by Mark’s and
Spark’s to be honest with you
I ain’t got much Google AdSense for that
shit set the scene think of like an
abandoned swimming changing room
this Mark’s and Spencer’s was very old
I would do the early morning shift
like the stacking up in the morning
the employee bathroom it was grim
mate walking through the back of the
building early in the morning was grim
you had this girl that used to go partying
in that same area she’d go into the
changing rooms (laughs) in the staff
room have a quick Power Nap
this girl was fresh as a daisy back there
and could like that she’d come back to
life within minutes not anymore
walking through this echoey eerie
alleyway you’ve still got people passed
out on the ground from the clubs
across the street you’ve got the crazy
guy asking you money for drugs
imagine that think of Harry Potter the
Order of the Phoenix how eerie
that alleyway was when the Dementor
come through that was the kind of
alleyway a Dementor would definitely
of fucking flown in there scared the
crap out of ya during the day fine
but in the night early in the morning
I’d get there for like 4:30 in the morning
I would literally poo myself like run you
know those moments when you’re a kid
I’m lying there I still do it to this day
when you turn the light off you
marching half way up the stairs
you’re like I can do this I can do this
then you feel like there’s some sort of
slender man behind you you fucking canter
up the stairs that kind of feeling that
you when you were setting your ass down
this alleyway I mean I got paid weekly
the money was good everyone there was cool
we had I had some good time working in
there anyway leaving the scene of the
Dementor alleyway you went to this door
that you would lock yourself in from the
back of the door not in the office
like during that feeling when you’re
running up the stairs thinking there’s
some sort of boogeyman behind you you
start to punch in the numbers like a
freaking idiot you run up these very high
set of concrete stairs smash my knees in
every freaking morning I think I’ve still
got scars on my knees cause of that
desperate to go for a wee because this
girl drunk two red bulls while she was on
The bus on the way there yeah this
building was haunted as well waltz to the
toilet it was grim mold leak spots up the
ceiling I shit you not there was some
girls that had to go in together because
they were too scared to go in it was
prison vibes the store was lovely but the
back well I run to the toilet sitting down
holding me leg up high because oh yes
it’s like prison toilets i forgot I was
in prison now there was no lock
on the door so my leg is out high
my leg is right out there keeping the
door shut while trying to pee at the same
time it was very hard to concentrate
I swipe the toilet paper while I’m doing
this the employee doesn’t even think
the door just swings open lo and behold
you see me naked from waist down
(laughing) swiping position
oh my God I felt so sorry for her
cause she was an older lady and I
was mortified for her shoulder have been
pissed off because she should have
thought “hmm I’ve been here for several
years now, I’ve been here for two decades
now, maybe I should knock the pissing
door nay nay course not it’s my life
isn’t it she’s standing there looking at
me naked from waist down I’m now
looking at her (laughs) with my
(inaudible) there are times people
have seen me in the worst of times that
was a moment beyond that she can see
my cleanly shaved (laughs) she’s no
longer here I’m joking funny enough
she was just stranding there shocked
not like “ugh” waltzes out and I feel
exposed pull my leggings up and
I’m looking any myself in the mirror and
there’s a bit of mold there at least
someone saw my hoo haw
no one ever sees my hoo haw that’s a
Very rare sighting anyone sees my hoo haw
God just so happy it was her who saw my
hoo haw and no one else another thing I’ve
just remembered working in that store
it was just one of those moments
It was the first customer I had
he was rude as all ass
this is when I was on the till
Had to cover for the clothing department
aaaah I feel dirty remembering it HLEGH
first customer of the morning, it was 7 am
stores like that, like markses and stuff
opened a lot earlier
during christmas time. first customer of the day
he was an an absolute ogre
he was lovely, plesant, very very rude
He waltzes up to me, doesnt pass me these trousers he wanted to return
oooh nay nay, course not, first customer of the day!
flashes the bag in my face
good morning how can I help you?
so youre returning this, then?
deep evil voice Yes
as if hes asking me who the fuck im talking to
I have the best retail face, I can smile for miles
but this guy, hes not going to take the contents out of the bag
he wants me to do it, me, muggy
as soon as im halfway, pulling the contents out the bag
I smell a stench, old marajuana
and uhm kitty pee
I know the smell of kitty pee
Im holding the back of my checks, im thinking
that smell, I cant handle it
I had [indistinct] horses for years
20 a day at some times, they all came back in a day
cleam up baby bums
but this smell... I bet a dead body was wearing it
Pulled it out of a forensic scene
and tried to return the bitch
working in retail youd be shocked what people try to return
trust me. I push the button under my till cause i know
cause I know that this isnt going to go spiffingly well
all of the managers at that store, as grim as the place was
the managers were amazing
Had our backs, I didnt even need to explain to her
cause she could smell it
Just trying to get it out of her throat
thats how strong the stench was
All i remember was a MMMaaassive back and forth
he doesnt walk off with credit, doesnt walk off with a refund
just leaves the pants, pants like trousers
we'll get to that one in a minute
im standing there looking at this set of pants and
im lookin at it like girl what do we do with these
walk down the road and incenerate them?
Put em out of their mysery
Cant remember if it was called a return box or a debit box
in these "debit boxes"
the shit you find in there
will make you lose faith in human beings
not only we saw a pee stain on it, on the back of the trouser
there was a poo stain, definetly cat poo
that was in the return box for months
and that smell, never went away
everyone at the store room just sort of tried to avoid it
like the plague
another one is when people come from another planet
there is a small amount of people that think you can return used underpants
I kid you not, in the recent store I worked at
we would not return underwear at all
we sold underwear but we would not return it at all
makes sense right?
this woman... thiiiiis womannnn..
is very self absorbant, very self richous
woman waltzes to my till
has to be my station doesnt it, thats where shit goes wrong
passes the box of mens pants in my face like
just waves it in my face, not like hey can I return something
this is why retail workers are such misrable bastards
she waves this box of underpants in my face
and at first I thought, cause of these werd experiences ive had
that they were unopened
Its on the recept somewhere roughly
its in very fine print, but you can still read it
its still very very easy to read
and shes trying to return them
and im trying to explain to her, I cant take these back
we cant exchange or refund these
we're really sory, but due to our policy
we cannot return or exchange underwear
very nicely, I was famous for being the most bubbly person on the till
the managers didnt like that