[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:00.00,0:00:01.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,…meditation retreat joke.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:01.56,0:00:06.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's this person, he’s been\Non a meditation retreat for nine days.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:06.06,0:00:08.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And you do actually find\Nthat people do actually slow down.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:08.92,0:00:11.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You walk very \Nslowly, you talk very slowly.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:11.96,0:00:14.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Can you get much more\Nmindful even picking things up?
Dialogue: 0,0:00:14.98,0:00:17.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You pick it up and\Nyou notice all these amazing sensations
Dialogue: 0,0:00:17.73,0:00:20.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when you pick things up\Nor you put it down again.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:20.81,0:00:22.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You do things very slowly.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:22.55,0:00:25.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So after the nine day \Nretreat fella went back to work,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:25.12,0:00:28.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and he was working in Perth Zoo.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:28.11,0:00:30.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And so when the head keeper saw him,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:30.02,0:00:34.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you know, coming to \Nwork walking very slowly
Dialogue: 0,0:00:34.04,0:00:39.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and mindfully, he thought ‘’What\Nam I going to do with this guy today?’’.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:39.39,0:00:41.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And so he thought\Nhe had this brilliant idea.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:41.78,0:00:46.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He said ‘’I know! I'm gonna put you\Nin charge of the tortoise enclosure.’’
Dialogue: 0,0:00:46.96,0:00:49.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:00:49.61,0:00:52.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Obviously because\Ntortoises go really slowly.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:52.34,0:00:54.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So if you’ve been \Non a meditation retreat,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:54.39,0:00:56.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,if you're working at a zoo\Nthat's the best thing to do,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:56.60,0:00:58.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you know – look after the tortoises.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:58.48,0:01:10.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So he told the head keeper ‘’Yes.\NI. Will. Look. After. The. Tortoises.’’.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:10.42,0:01:17.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And he walked very slowly\Nand mindfully to the tortoise enclosure
Dialogue: 0,0:01:17.33,0:01:21.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And at lunch time the\Nhead keeper decided to check up on him.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:21.06,0:01:26.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And there he was, in front of\Nthe tortoise enclosure, with the gate open
Dialogue: 0,0:01:26.04,0:01:28.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and all the tortoises had escaped.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:28.07,0:01:32.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:01:32.40,0:01:35.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When the head keeper asked\N“What happened??”
Dialogue: 0,0:01:35.42,0:01:49.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,‘’Well.’’ said the meditator, ‘’I.\NOpened. The. Gate. And. Whoosh!”.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:49.65,0:01:57.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:01:57.56,0:02:00.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's an old meditation teacher’s joke.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:00.29,0:02:01.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:02:01.33,0:02:03.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because when you\Nreally go slow even tortoises whoosh!
Dialogue: 0,0:02:03.90,0:02:06.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:02:06.51,0:02:08.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So anyway…