♪ Put on my blue tracksuit
♪ and I got on a bus
♪ Sat down by the man stinking of stale piss
♪ and got up again with minimal fuss
♪ At the Mecca Bingo
♪ where the Muslims go to bet
♪ Yeah, I got off at the right bus stop
♪ but I ain't done no shopping yet
♪ but I'm walking to Lidl
♪ Yeah I'm walking with my Primark shopping bag
♪ Walking to Lidl
♪ Cuz there's a special on my favourite fags
♪ Saw the half-price chicken
♪ on the corner of aisle 6
♪ Saw old Mavis had her eye on it
♪ so I nicked her walking stick!
♪ Now security, they did not see me
♪ They just loitered round the door
♪ But I've got chicken in my bag and with the special on fags
♪ I know I'm coming back for more!
♪ I love shopping in Lidl
♪ I love 20 packs of crisps for 15p
♪ Shopping in Lidl
♪ Cider for 10p is great for me
♪ Shopping in Lidl
♪ The only place to go to get your fill
♪ Shopping in Lidl
♪ When you end up with a minus £10 bill
♪ They've got codfish on the counter (Oooohhh)
♪ Bananas hanging in the air (Oooohhh)
♪ With your limited funds you can still buy food
♪ When you think you haven't got a prayer
♪ You got a prayer in Lidl
♪ Down in the wine and beer aisle
♪ I fill up my bag with booze
♪ They ask me if I'm gonna pay for it
♪ I said, "Is the Pope a Jew?"
♪ So they take me into the office
♪ and I shout with all my might
♪ They said, "Tell me, are you a robbing slag?"
♪ I said, "Yes I am tonight!"
♪ I love shopping in Lidl (Shopping in Lidl)
♪ Tins whose labels I can't understand
♪ Shopping in Lidl (Shopping in Lidl)
♪ It's a cut-price shopping wonderland
♪ Shopping in Lidl (Shopping in Lidl)
♪ It's a place where dreams are bought and sold
♪ Shopping in Lidl (Shopping in Lidl)
♪ A multicultural place for young and old
♪ Put on my blue tracksuit... ♪
Forgot the fucking milk!