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So, a few years ago,

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I was beginning a new unit on race
with my fourth-graders.

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And whenever we start a new unit,

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I like to begin by having all the students
list everything they know about it,

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and then we also list questions we have.

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And I had the type of moment
that every teacher has nightmares about.

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One of my students
had just asked the question,

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"Why are some people racist?"

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And another student, let's call her Abby,

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had just raised her hand and volunteered:

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"Maybe some people don't like black people
because their skin is the color of poop."

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Yeah, I know.

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So, as if on cue,
my entire class exploded.

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Half of them immediately started laughing,

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and the other half started yelling at Abby

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and shouting things like,

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"Oh, my God, you can't say that,
that's racist!"

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So just take a second
to freeze this scene in your mind.

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There's a class
of nine- and ten-year-olds,

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and half of them are in hysterics

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because they think
Abby has said something wildly funny,

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and the other half are yelling at her
for saying something offensive.

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And then you have Abby,
sitting there completely bewildered

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because, in her mind, she doesn't
understand the weight of what she said

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and why everybody is reacting this way.

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And then you have me, the teacher,

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standing there in the corner,
like, about to have a panic attack.

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So as a classroom teacher,

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I have to make split-second
decisions all the time.

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And I knew I needed to react, but how?

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Consider your fight-or-flight instincts.

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I could fight by raising my voice
and reprimanding her for her words.

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Or flight -- just change the subject

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and quickly start reaching
for another subject,

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like anything to get my students' minds
off the word "poop."

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However, as we know, the right thing to do
is often not the easy thing to do.

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And as much as I wanted
this moment to be over,

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and that I knew both of these options
would help me escape the situation,

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I knew that this was far too important
of a teachable moment to miss.

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So after standing there
for what felt like an eternity,

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I unfroze and I turned
to face my class, and I said,

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"Actually, Abby makes a point."

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And my students kind of
looked at each other, all confused.

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And I continued,

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"One reason why racism exists

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is because people with light skin
have looked at people with dark skin

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and said that their skin was ugly.

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And even use this reason
as an excuse to dehumanize them.

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And the reason why we're learning
about race and racism in the first place

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is to educate ourselves to know better.

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And to understand
why comments like this are hurtful,

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and to make sure
that people with dark skin

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are always treated
with respect and kindness."

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Now, this was a truly terrifying
teachable moment.

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But as we moved forward
in the conversation,

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I noticed that both Abby
and the rest of the kids

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were still willing to engage.

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And as I watched the conversation
really marinate with my students,

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I began to wonder how many of my students
have assumptions just like Abby.

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And what happens when those assumptions
go unnoticed and unaddressed,

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as they so often do?

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But first, I think it's important
to take a step back

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and even consider
what makes a topic taboo.

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I don't remember receiving
an official list of things

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you're not supposed to talk about.

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But I do remember hearing,
over and over, growing up:

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there are two things you do not talk about
at family get-togethers.

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And those two things
are religion and politics.

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And I always thought this was very curious

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because religion and politics
often are such huge influencing factors

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over so many of our
identities and beliefs.

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But what makes a topic taboo

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is that feeling of discomfort that arises
when these things come up in conversation.

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But some people are extremely fluent
in the language of equity,

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while other people fear being PC-shamed

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or that their ignorance will show
as soon as they open their mouths.

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But I believe that the first step
towards holding conversations

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about things like equity

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is to begin by building a common language.

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And that actually starts
with destigmatizing topics

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that are typically deemed taboo.

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Now, conversations
around race, for example,

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have their own specific language

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and students need
to be fluent in this language

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in order to have these conversations.

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Now, schools are often the only place

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where students can feel
free and comfortable

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to ask questions and make mistakes.

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But, unfortunately, not all students
feel that sense of security.

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Now, I knew that day
in front of my fourth-graders

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that how I chose to respond
could actually have life-long implications

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not only for Abby, but for the rest
of the students in my class.

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If I had brushed her words aside,

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the rest of the class could actually infer
that this type of comment is acceptable.

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But if I had yelled at Abby

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and embarrassed her
in front of all of her friends,

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that feeling of shame associated with one
of her first conversations on race

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could actually prevent her
from ever engaging on that topic again.

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Now, teaching kids about equity in schools
is not teaching them what to think.

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It is about giving them the tools
and strategies and language

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and opportunities
to practice how to think.

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For example, think about
how we teach kids how to read.

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We don't start by giving them books.

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We start by breaking down words
into letters and sounds

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and we encourage them to practice
their fluency by reading every single day,

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with a partner or with their friends.

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And we give them
lots of comprehension questions

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to make sure that they're
understanding what they're reading.

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And I believe that teaching
kids about equity

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should be approached
in the exact same way.

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I like to start by giving my students
a survey every year,

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about different issues
around equity and inclusion.

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And this is a sample survey
from one of my kids,

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and as you can see,
there's some humor in here.

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For under the question, "What is race?"

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she has written, "When two or more
cars, people and animals

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run to see who is fastest and who wins."

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However, if you look
at her question, "What is racism?"

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it says, "When somebody says or calls
someone dark-skinned a mean name."

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So, she's young, but she's showing
that she's beginning to understand.

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And when we act

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like our students aren't capable
of having these conversations,

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we actually do them such a disservice.

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Now, I also know
that these types of conversations

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can seem really, really intimidating
with our students,

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especially with young learners.

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But I have taught
first through fifth grades,

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and I can tell you, for example,

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that I'm not going to walk
into a first-grade classroom

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and start talking about things
like mass incarceration.

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But even a six-year-old first-grader
can understand the difference

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between what is fair --
people getting what they need.

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We identified a lot
of these things in class together.

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And the difference
between fair and equal --

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when everybody gets the same thing,

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especially goody bags at birthday parties.

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Now, first-graders can also
understand the difference

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between a punishment and a consequence.

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And all of these things
are foundational concepts

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that anyone needs to understand

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before having a conversation

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about mass incarceration
in the United States.

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Some people might think
that kindergarteners or first-graders

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are too young to have
conversations around racism,

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but also tell you that young kids

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understand that there are
many different components

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that make up our identities

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and how people are similar and different,

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and what it means to have power
when other people don't.

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When we have these conversations
with students at a young age,

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it actually takes away
some of that taboo feeling

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when those topics come up at a later age.

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I also know that teaching
about these things in schools

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can feel like navigating a minefield.

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For example, what happens
if parents or families

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aren't on board with having
these conversations in schools?

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But to these people, I can say:

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these are some examples of things
that students have said to me

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and brought to my attention.

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For example, I had a student come in
and whisper to me,

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"I've heard all these people
use the term LGBTQ,

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but I don't know what it means
and I'm too embarrassed to admit it."

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I had a student come in over a weekend
and come up to me and say,

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"You know, I just watched
this movie about Australia,

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and it made me wonder
if they have racism there, too."

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And I always want my students to be
comfortable having these conversations

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because when they're comfortable
talking about it and asking questions,

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they also build comfort in bringing in
their own lives and experiences

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in how they relate to these big topics.

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Also, some teachers might be
kind of nervous

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if a student brings up a topic
or asks a question

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and they don't know the answer to it.

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But if a student ever brings
something to my attention

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and I don't know the answer,

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I will always admit it and own it

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because I'm not going to pretend
to be an expert in something

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that I don't have experience in
or I'm not an authority on.

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That same year, I had a student come in

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and ask a question
about the LGBTQ community.

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And I just didn't know enough
to give them an appropriate answer.

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So instead, I encouraged that student

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to reach out and ask that question
to a representative of a nonprofit

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who had come to speak to our class
about that very same issue.

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When we admit to our students
that we don't have all the answers,

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not only does it humanize us to them,

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it also shows them that adults
have a long way to go, too,

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when it comes to learning
about issues of equity.

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Now, a little while back,
I wrote a lesson about consent.

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And, to some people,
this was very exciting

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because I took this topic
that seemed very taboo and scary

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and I broke it down into a way
that was accessible for young learners.

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However, to other people,

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the idea of consent
is so strongly tied to sex,

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and sex is often considered
a taboo subject,

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that it made them very uncomfortable.

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But my students are third-graders,

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so we're not talking about sex in class.

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Rather, I wanted them to understand

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that everybody has different
physical boundaries

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that make them feel comfortable.

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And the social and emotional
intelligence it takes

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to read somebody's words
and tone and body language

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are skills that often need
to be explicitly taught,

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the same way we teach things
like reading and math.

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And this lesson is not reserved
for students of one single demographic.

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Things like questioning
and making observations

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and critical thinking

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are things that any student
of any race or ethnicity

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or background or language or income
or zip code should be learning in schools.

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Also, deliberate avoidance
of these conversations

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speaks volumes to our students

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because kids notice when their teachers,
when their textbooks

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leave out the voices and experiences
of people like women or people of color.

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Silence speaks volumes.

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I recently asked my class of third-graders

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what they would say to adults
who think they're too young

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to learn about issues of equity.

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And while this is a small sample
of my 25 students,

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all of them agreed

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that not only are they capable
of having these conversations,

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but they view it, the right to learn it,
as a right and not as a privilege.

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And, in their words:

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"We're big enough
to know about these things

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because these problems
are happening where we live.

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And we have the right to talk about them

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because it will be our life
in the future."

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Thank you.

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(Applause)